I Dont Really Get The People Who Tell Me To Not Overshare My Trauma To Everyone Because I Need To Protect

I don’t really get the people who tell me to not “overshare” my trauma to everyone because I need to “protect” myself… because all I know is me being honest and open has saved atleast 5 people and has changed several others around me into thinking before saying something. So yeah I’m going to tell everyone abt the horrors I’ve faced, in the hopes that atleast one of them will know not to unintentionally hurt another person and atleast one of them will feel less lonely.

I always feel like I'm teetering on a ledge where I am simultaneously too much and still never enough... for anyone.

Easy - Seo Changbin

Pairing: Seo Changbin x Reader

tags: fluff, just pure fluff, boyfriend Changbin, oc overthinks a bit, subtle mentions of trauma ig, oc gender not specifically mentioned

a/n: not proofread, kind of a ramble, desperately needed to write cuz grad school has been kicking my ass

masterlist

The pitter-patter of rain keeps you awake through the night. You stare at the ceiling and then turn around to see your boyfriend lying on the bed next to you.

It was wild how quickly life can change. Just less than a month ago you were sleeping on this bed, in your new apartment, alone and cold. And now there is this beautiful boy right next to you, the warmth emanating from him lighting up your soul from within.

Changbin had come into your life like a whirlwind that calmed your soul. One moment he was a stranger giving you a kind smile when you dropped your books on the floor of the library staircase and the next he was a friend holding your hand through a tough evening. And now he is yours, in every waking and sleeping moment.

You watch as he breathes peacefully in his sleep, his chest rising and falling calmly. You trace mindless patterns on his arm that lay across your midriff. He stirs in his sleep and holds you tighter.

A year ago you would've absolutely despised the ides of going to sleep with someone because you're hyper independent brain could never fathom the idea of letting yourself be this vulnerable and close to someone. Your bed had been your refuge for a decade, no matter how incorrigible life became you could always come back to your bed and breathe peacefully in the comfort of the dark and let the acidic feelings out into the ever-absorbant pillows.

As you stare into the peaceful sleeping face of Changbin you realise that you haven't struggled to breathe in a while now. You could breathe freely around him, even on days when the whole world was weighing down on you. And especially on the days you got exhausted of him and yourself... you could still breathe freely and express yourself around him.

It all seemed like magic. Yet it felt like the most normal order of things. For this exuberant, softie of a boy to come into your life and turn it around the way the leaves turned orange all around you. During the summer you had taken all measures to spend the winter in your own comfortable company- even buying extra heating to stay warm as the snow falls. And yet, months later, you can see the snow fall out the window and warmth spreads around you from Changbin's soft breaths.

Changbin made it seem like loving you was the easiest thing in his life and for once you had someone to lean on without feeling inferior.

He was everything you didn't know you needed. He matched your loudness, played along with your childishness, and held you softly like a rare flower blooming only under his touch. Changbin showed his love loudly, proudly and ardently but understood that you express it in the little things. Sure the understanding hadn't come in a day, it had taken work.

You still remember the hurt on his face as he watched you ruin yourself because it felt impossible for you to let yourself be loved or taken care of. You remember the tears that rolled down your eyes on a chilly fall night as the both of you let your frustration at work get into your relationship.

It is that very pain, those salty tears and nights of apologies and condolences that made this very moment rewarding. Without the bad times, you would never know how valuable having Changbin by your side is.

"Slee-eep... babbyyyy..."

Your very erratic train of thought has been interrupted by a low grumble from your boyfriend. You titled your head away from the window on the other side to face him. His eyes were closed but you knew he was awake by the way he scrunched his nose and immediately snuggled into your neck when you turned to face him.

"Huh?" You mumbled back soft enough for him to hear but not wake up entirely.

Changbin's pretty eyes opened up slightly and he smiled softly at your face before leaning in and leaving a soft peck on your forehead (that never got old) before pulling back to see you.

"It's too early for your brain to be whirring." His morning voice was deep and his face was soft like a baby. This man was a living juxtaposition most of the time, but that's what made him special.

"Sorry, did I wake you up?" You ask tracing your fingers along his cheeks and nose.

"The noise from your brain running woke me." He said and nuzzled right back into your neck making you snuggle closer into his embrace.

"Sorry..." was all you could say before he gave a light peck on your lips and pulled you into a tight embrace against his chest.

"No need. just rest."

You couldn't really argue when you were smack dab against his very built chest and soft belly. It felt the closest to a home and the storm in your gut settled down. You could feel Changbin's palms caressing your back and his lips pressed lightly on your head as he drifted back to sleep. His steady breath formed a nice rhythm that made your brain relax and your eyes close.

Falling asleep in the arms of a man who patched your broken pieces with love that flowed and ebbed from every part of him as the snow fell down the cold streets like diamonds from the sky was all you could've asked for. You felt lighter in years as you drifted to sleep. A small smile formed on your lips, when you realised that Changbin's lips left a smile against your head as he slept.

ADHD writing culture is never getting through others' writing pieces if they're mainly/all descriptive text. My brain needs action.

kind of scared that people in the cinema will assume that I’m not a real swiftie because I won’t dress up or wear merch to see the movie but what they don’t know is that I was there for the gloves incident. swiftmas. yes whale. 300 people know. have i made a mistake what is a chain post…they don’t even know that I got five Taylor likes and I’m being so humble about it

it’s october. it’s Their Time