Hey Guys. Sooo We All Know That Im Not Consistent On Here. But When I Show Up! You Have To Admit, That

Hey guys. Sooo we all know that I’m not consistent on here. But when I show up! You have to admit, that its good. Lol

So today I had a really good conversation within myself.

To paint a clear picture, I work over nights. Which is really important. I’ll be explained later on. So my work night starts at 20:30 hrs. And thats just prep time. I actually start work at 21:00. I’m a newly promoted person in charge. Im a (SUPERIOR!!!!)

In my profession. It takes a while to earn this status. Which at one point I had turn down. So… to make a bigger deal of my position. There’s tiers. 1-9 and I’m at 5. But when I started this security position, which is part time by the way. I entered at level 3. Which cave me a bit of an ego boost. I’ve been with this part time security organization for 7 years. I would have been a tier 6 but because I declined my position before I’m at tier 5. Which at the time. I have to say was very wise.

So from 21:00 until 05:00 hrs. My team and I are a presence. A deterrent as you will. Most of us professional and proficient. While others are clearly here to cash the checks and buy a house.

At 05:00hrs. I head home. By which I go to through public transit. The 4 or 3 train to Brooklyn. YEA!!! Brooklyn. A part of New York I’m never really in. Or care to be in. Its a part of New York that feels as if its just segregated. And there’s just no need to be apart of. I mean they are the part of the city that get hit with the storms first. Thus! Slowing it down over the rest of the city.

By the tome I get home its 06:00hrs. And I take a shower and brush my teeth. I have a personal belief that when you work in service. Helping demographics that are under privileged, there negative energy clings to you.

When I w home the bathroom is the first place I go. I undress myself and kick the clothes in a corner. And get in the tub. I wash with soap thats been infused with green tea sage and one other banisher. And once I’m wet I wash my face and brush my teeth in the shower. Because why not! Once I get dressed I don’t see the point. While tired, doing these grooming steps I could have do e while in the shower.

After doing those tedious things. I begin to chant to my spirits and call them to help me remove the energy I picked up. And I continue to do this procedure until I feel clean and almost see the negative energy in the suds going down the drain.

Once I finish, I get out the tub and immediately from the back I stand and spray in the direction of the drain with bleach. After that I leave the bathroom. Prep some tea and take multivitamins capsules. Head back into the bathroom and run the shower on cold. Until the bleach is gone.

This is all the things I do before I head to bed. Once I jump in my sweet cradle of rest. I knock out for a few hours. By this time its 08:00. Then I typically sleep for 7 hours. And I should be awake at 14:00hrs. And procrastinate for an hour. Then I go the gym and hype myself up to be a body builder. To only almost die from too much pre-workout. Lol.

Yes this is true it happens a little too often for my liking. But after going to the gym at 1600 i head back to house to shower again and do this routine all over again.

Sounds like a lot right! Well… it is. Usually my job allows me to be in a hotel. “Great right” but! There are stipulations to these. Such as distance and how long it takes you to get to work. Unfortunately, for me I don’t quality. It takes me only (30/1.45) min from new lots to 42nd street. And I’m less than 30 miles. Soooo…….. yup..!… I don’t qualify

Honestly, its actually a good thing that I’m not in a hotel because they reserve the right to check your room. And you cannot have people over which sucks because I would have slutted it up

So the whole point of this rant is to give you insight into my day! Im 3 weeks in and to myself, walking home from the gym I had to express to myself out loud. I’m……. Not……… happy!!!!

Recently I had my own very modern version of eat pray love. Where I went to Africa on the east cost. And I with a very well established team help liberate this 3rd world group of people. We pretty my educated them on various methods of self preservation. My hand in it was cooking and giving my love and life into the food. They were eating.

There! I learned I wasn’t happy either. But there I had time to burn. Burn in the sense I was working and getting paid very well and!!! And! I had tome to think! All of my basic needs were met and I truly was able to deeply self reflect.

My reflection told me I wasted time and parts of my life on things that don’t even belong to me. Which is the hate I had for my parents. The anger I had towards people who intentionally did me wrong.

So here! I caught myself falling back into the same behavior.

I’m not happy.

So! I might have to quit for the sake of my mental and emotional health. I’m not doing what feeds my soul. Which is art! Sex and poetry.

I love this.

A yellow kind of day, no thanks to the wildfires.

“There is nothing which remains difficult if it is practised. So, through practice with minor discomforts, even major discomfort becomes bearable.”

— Śāntideva, Bodhicaryāvatāra, Crosby & Skilton tr. (6:14)

This food for thought over hea!!!! Has been the seed to my whole existence. I learned that we all may experience the same thing. But take different slices from it.

This experience has became more & more prevalent to me. Especially when I would do readings on the street in Union square just for fun. You know, you have to keep your skills sharp. And I have to say. That, I would get some people who would debate the meaning of things with me. As if I did not know what I was talking about. For instance, in this sharpening of skills, I sat across the street from Starbucks, in, union square park. Directly in front of a statue where there's a mother holding her hungering child. "At least that's what I can remember, I'm in Africa right now" so my mind is pre occupied with Army stuff.

a few years back. I would sit there in Union square and be soo outlandish and boisterous. Loudly chanting "Reading, Reading.... do you care to be read. Do you care to know what the future holds!?" This I could tell you, that the spirits were on my mutha Fuckin back! Okay!!!! The energy was strong! I was feeling spicy and saucy. Talking my shit, doing, my shit! I loved every minute of it.

In all of that energy, moving and grooving I attracted a middle aged Asian woman who was looking for clarity. Clarity that she most definitely found with me. I do not remember all of the details of her reading. And since I don’t know her name and have not posted her picture. I will talk about her case. lol I have my own moral code when I do my readings. For me, one of them is that I will not share people information unless strictly given clear authority to do so, with other people who can figure out who it is. I respect people boundaries. It's a two may street here. Not only is the person being read is vulnerable. But! Also the reader! We take on so much of the bad JuJu and the emotional dump that comes with people opening up to us.

In all, this women comes to me and sits down at the table the park has already provided. And rightfully so, questions me about what it is that I do. Which is fair. I mean I am a whole stranger in a park in New York city that she does not know. I mean, It's a hustle city! Where you have to hustle or be hustled. But! I digress. After she completes her interrogation. She stops moving and locks eyes with me. I could tell, she was ready to ask her question and get an answers.

The process in which I divinate, so that the person feels more at ease. Is, I ask them to ask the question loudly in there heads and only think of that one question. And that question specifically. If not! I'll get the two questions. Even if you asked the question in a variety of ways. It will be confusing and you wont get a clear response to whats been asked. And yes the cards will reflect that for me. Every reader has his, hers or theirs own way of doing things. lol (I'm trying my best to be inclusive)

As I shuffle my cards; Locked into her energy. psychically pulling her thoughts and wonders into my cards. I throw a hand. "Now! the deets get blurry because this story happened so long ago!" But! Long story short I was on the money. I knew what she wanted to know and I have clarified it for her. The first part of her reading I do remember confirming something I could have never known about her. And that she was impressed. She did not live a normal life or have a normal type of career. At least, whats not normal for NYC. Towards the end of her reading. She and I butted heads because of semantics. She did't like how I was using certain words to define how she understood and experienced her life.

Ultimately, the reading closed out and she paid me. But I was perturbed that she challenged me on what I felt and saw for her. After all I was the reader. But this was a clear lesson and a win for my future readings. & that win is, I should choose my words very carefully. Not everyone will understand things in the way that I will.

Back then I really thought I was hot shit. I mean, I was and still am. I'm very skilled in my craft. However, I though to myself all those years ago, I'm an Empath and getting the information in 3 ways. & I learned, not right away mind you. that with all of the way I can magically, spiritually gather information. Does not me I can dictate how someone is experiencing something. That it does not mean that I can change the narrative of how they feel it, think it and even live it.

She wanted to get my information at the end. But! I said "No" At this point in my life I was not as humble as I am now. I did not live for the sake of knowledge. I lived to be right! I lived for power. Being a psychic vampire and casting spells because I could. I was just a menace. Not all psychic vampires are bad! I mean we exchange energy all the time. And most of the time, when doing readings.

I didn’t like how I would not want to finish or even start one. Because of the energy exchange. I'm more emotionally mature now. So I know to clean myself every other day. Or every day. Little do people know they are doing magic or spiritual practices everyday and don’t even know it. I have to go now. I have to ask a Ugandan about some hash browns.

Just a reminder that the people you look to for information and advice on religious practices, witchcraft, and other aspects of the spiritual are primarily sharing from a place of personal experience as well as their own values and ethics. This means that not everything one person shares or emphasizes will be relevant to you or vibe with you. That doesn’t automatically make them or you wrong. It just means that aspects of their teachings isn’t for you and you’re welcome to ignore it. Take what works for you and leave behind what doesn’t. Also learn from and engage with multiple people so you are exposed to different perspectives and possibilities. 

My Official Military Christmas.

First and for most. Happy holidays to all of those who reads this and who practice a difference faith than I do. I also have to say I'm not a Christian but! A Santero and spiritualist.

In these spaces I occupy, I have to take whats familiar to me. And well Christmas is witchy in nature. With all that being said. I have to say that my experience with this group of men are so different from what I am use to. That leadership does make a whole difference as to how you live in these environments and grow as a soldier.

The idea of putting up of the Christmas tree was one of the Air men's idea. Which I thought was pretty cool and very sweet. It did build moral as he knew that it would. When I saw it, It made me think of the pleasant times I had with my own family and the joys associated with Christmas.

It's ghetto as it'll ever be! But I have to say that I really do like it's creative nature. Since I work in the kitchen someone asked me to save the disposable table clothes. They're going to cut them up and make ribbons or bow ties out of them and add it to the tree dressed with Ripit energy drinks.

Now, myself, I don’t drink these. But the other guys do, and a lot. And they love them. I'll stick to my NewyoRican ways of drinking coffee and dying of dehydration because that's all I'll choose to put into my body. lol And yes, I'm joking!!!!!! Here I cannot do that. I think I would literally die! It's sooo dame hot here! I know Africa is suppose to be hot. But! I have to say, the thought of something. being in your head. Vers the experience is something else and actually doing it. man! I have to say I need to live a lot more than I have.

I'm just happy to see the tree. people are doing secret santa. my platoon isn’t doing it. and I'm not too sure how we can anyway.I mean were here! and we don't go any where and there are no stores. I'm just happy because well my family home will be happy. I also now that I'm not missing anything. We video chat quite often. I'm going to do my best to get the most out of this deployment. But the tree has definitely sparked some feelings in me I thought I have forgotten about. Which I have to say is a very good thing. I like when these good feelings and memories come back. Flooding my heart and head.

Over all, I know I made the decision thats best for me. I questioned myself about being a soldier. about being a military member. These question arise because my contract is coming to an end. And it's about that time to renew it. Or! Leave. I have thought bout leaving. Because of the horrendous leadership. People who are out for themselves and do not care about the people who follow them. But! thats another Blog post to be made.

However, I have to say that I titled this my first official Christmas because. The fist time I had one. The world around me way dying. It was 2020 and Covid was at an all time high. Christmas was jot on my mind although it was on everyone else’s. This year I’m I’m good spirits and have another ancestors to add to my alter. My first deployment was my uncle billy and now it’s my aunt Carolyn. I’m using this moral booster to cover up my pain. I’m not ready to be this exposed. Especially with a good group that I’m with.

Must love dogs. And tea.