This Is Giving Me So Much Brain Rot It's Unbelievable...

This is giving me so much brain rot it's unbelievable...

Pick me girls and OM! Brothers - Part 1

Characters: Lucifer, Mammon and Levi (x reader, separately)

CW: pick me girl behavior, suggestive, mentions of sex between the brothers and mc, mentions of violence, a bit of magic, mentions of cheating (not actual cheating), mammon and mc taking a shower together, jealous mc, some fluff, some hurt, some comfort, kinda ooc but i had so much fun with this

Lucifer

Wherever you went, rumor followed. Haven't you heard? The mighty Lord of Pride has a significant other. Who could it be? Maybe the prince or his butler? Both of them? Or perhaps it was just some random demon? Surely not the human... right?

"Of course not!" said the witch, surrounded by both curious and jealous nobles.

You weren't in the balcony, but you could still hear the conversation in your spot near the open door. You could also hear the gasps and the murmurs. It was ridiculous.

What to do next? You could interrupt the gossip and make your relationship public; after all, it was only a matter of time before someone spotted you both in Ristorante Six or an empty hallway in RAD.

Ignoring them was the better option, however. No words sounded aggressive and yet polite enough to get the witch to shut up without making a scene. Plus, Lucifer was looking exquisitely fine that night. His wings did wonders to his appearance.

"Then who?" the voices asked while you walked away towards your boyfriend.

"Well, I wasn't supposed to say anything..."

Oh no she did not.

"But we're just so in love"

I'll be damned, you thought. She did.

The wrath you felt was primal and it provoked a worried glance from Satan, who was chatting with one of his many contacts in the other side of the ballroom.

You wanted to make an entrance, a dramatic one, but you could only watch as the witch talked and talked about her supposed first date with Lucifer, their first kiss, their first time, his performance in bed (which... No. She was so wrong about that one).

Finally, you opened your mouth.

"You don't say?"

But that wasn't your voice.

Beside you stood Lucifer in all his glory, with a smile that didn't reach his eyes and a hand hugging your waist. The floor trembled under your feet as he walked and, if it wasn't for his tight grip, the magic induced vertigo would've send you to the ground.

You could tell he was trying not to harm you too much, but the group in the balcony wasn't so lucky. All of them were on their knees and some even coughing blood.

"Do tell all your stories tonight, by dawn you'll have no tongue to keep lying"

The witch had tears in her eyes, too focused on her own pain to be aware of her surroundings or his words. Was he being serious? You wanted to ask what would really happen to that woman, but Lucifer was always two steps ahead.

He cradled your face and kissed you, slowly yet firm. His cold skin felt good against yours, already blushing under his half lidded eyes.

"Dance with me?" he asked, caressing your bottom lip with his thumb.

Damn, did he know how to distract you.

Mammon

"You're dating the Great Mammon!" he'd said with his characteristic smile, both of you eating ramen in your bed while watching bad romcoms "That's something to be stoked about! You need to tell everyone about it!"

Of course, that translated to: please, please, please, I need people to know that I bagged YOU and YOU chose ME.

So, there you were, chatting with his makeup stylist and some other models while he posed in front of the camera. It was better than you expected, actually. You thought the fashion world in the Devildom would be full of self righteous assholes and insufferable divas, but you couldn't be more wrong.

Well, of course, there's always an exception.

There was a demoness in the other side of the studio, taking selfies with a pout in her lips and a fake, nauseating, innocence in her expression. She looked toxic from a mile away.

And yet, your boyfriend dated her for three months; three long and excruciating months, yes, but still. They'd dated.

And you were cool with that. So so cool with that. You were chill. A freezer, even. You loved Mammon and everyone and their mother could tell Mammon loved you. Everything was fine.

Except... well...

It was easy to forget the brothers were famous and popular bachelors, princes of hell, that, just like in every human monarchy, had fans to spare. People that would support them no matter what they did and no matter who they dated and people that would hate everyone they dated because... You don't really know why.

You just had some haters.

And this bitch was taking advantage of this, you knew it in your heart.

Rumors of Mammon cheating on you with one of his model coworkers had been there since the beginning of your relationship. It was something you just had to live with, one of the reasons the Avatar of Greed doted on you with everything he had.

Mammon loved you.

So why did you panick so much when he stood up in the underwear he was advertising, getting ready for the next picture, and the demoness took a selfie of her lips with his half naked body behind her?

"That whore" whispered another model behind you. You liked them.

But it was okay, you didn't mind. No, really. You didn't.

Except you did.

And so did Mammon.

"Oi!"

Everyone looked at him and you could swear his demon form was starting to show, blending with his siluette in blurred edges.

"Delete that"

She could've laughed at him, like everyone tended to do. She could've ignored him and tempt fate, but it was not a wise idea.

The demoness gasped, letting her DDD fall to the ground like it burned her. Looking at her smoking hands, it probably did.

There was static in the air, black mist barely clouding your vision and a faint voice whispering in the back of your brain. The sound of feathers filled the room and soon crows started to surround the studio outside the window.

After a couple of sickening minutes, a loud pop settled the place back to normal and caused the birds to fly away.

After that, everyone acted like nothing happened. You, however? Your whole body was buzzing, leaving you paralyzed with feelings you needed to explore in the future and making Mammon look at you with a knowing smile.

"...sick of those rumors..." he'd say hours later while he washed your hair in the shower "and you dumbass humans believe everything you see, even if it's stupid"

He'd wait until you were both in bed, ruminating about every little thing that happened back there before talking again.

"Because it's stupid, you know? I'd never cheat on ya. The Great Mammon would never do that to you. I mean, I'd never to that anyway, but specially not to you. Keep that in mind, human! You catched the best demon of all hell! Lucky you!"

Lucky me, he wanted to say instead.

You understood him anyways.

Leviathan

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu sent you a message!

.

.

You stared at the screen and the screen stared back at you.

Reading the user name physically hurt you and you'd lie if you said you weren't worried about it. Did you trust Levi? Yes, absolutely. Did you trust f3istyk1ttenuwu? Not really, no.

So (this time voluntarily), you opened the gates of hell.

It was the Devildom version of Discord, which was worrying enough, and the user's pfp showed a cute pinked hair girl with dainty horns and half of her boobs out.

With a frown and your heartbeat in your throat, you opened the chatroom.

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: r u lone?

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: did ur frend leef?

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: shes a party pooper

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: didnt let u join the grp

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: :(

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: leviachsn?

.

Oh, heeeeell no.

First of all, it was leviachAn. Second, YOU were the only one who could call him THAT.

Ignoring the voice of reason, you checked the door before investigating the previous messages. Levi was in your room, retrieving your nightwear as punishment for not letting you win in Devil Kart YET AGAIN, so, knowing how flustered he got everytime he saw you in the Ruri Chan's inspired piyamas he got you for your birthday, you were sure you had another couple of minutes alone in his room.

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: thx 4 sving me !!

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: we shld team more

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: were zo good 2gether

wEre Zo gOoD 2gETheR

You couldn't help but mock her in the privacy of your mind. Did she think writing like a 10 year old was attractive? If so, what the fuck?

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: call? brke my pc & cn't fix it alone \(-o-)/

"Call a fucking tech" you whispered to yourself.

"Henry?"

Fuck.

You turned around like a deer in headlights. Levi's cheeks still wore a furious red, but he remained quiet at the door when he saw you snooping through his private conversations.

Fuck it, you thought after some uncomfortable seconds. If someone could understand jealousy, it would be him.

"Who's this girl?"

Levi frowned and got closer to you, leaning over your shoulder to see his computer, probably giving you the closeness he'd crave if he was in your place.

"Oh, I don't know" his final answer disappointed you "Some girl the others wanted in the party"

But why was she talking to him like that?

"And why is she talking to you like that?"

He shrugged his shoulders, knowing that both of you knew the answer. Then, he straightened like he had an epiphany, and looked at you with shining eyes and a smile too big for his face.

"Are you jealous, MC?"

Levi jumped in happiness before you could say anything, unable to truly express how happy he was upon his sin affecting you.

"My Henry is jealous!! Because of a yucky disgusting otaku like me!! This reminds me of that anime: 'Help?! My crush snooped through my pc and now they're jealous because someone else is flirting with me??'"

It was obvious by now you had nothing to worry about, so you let him be. You let him appreciate how much you loved him.

In the end, you had to shower his face in kisses to shut him up and, for great measure, you also changed into that extra large Ruri Chan t-shirt in front of him.

Hours later, both of you were sweating in the comfort of his bathtub and Levi was completely sure you fell asleep.

And if you saw how he offered himself to fix this girl's computer only to hack her camera and post her real face all around the internet, no you didn't.

Tagging them lovely people: @hello-gloomy @the-sassiest-toaster @hero-nii-blog @yourlocalyin

Hope you like it!

The accuracy is unfathomable...

By @/jottober from TikTok

The premium version of human is here to wreck house, mfs.

[Twst x Obey Me!AFAB!reader]

CHP. 5

Previous chapter; Prologue 4

CW: Same as previous chapters.

The start of the "Rose-Red Tyrant aka. Satan but tiny🌹" is nearing, y'all 🤭

Next morning...

You dragged Crowley to a quiet corner of the infirmary while temporarily kicking Yuu out, just so that you and this squawking headmaster can have a heart-to-heart discussion about the roles that you and Yuu will play in the future as Crowley tries to search for your way home.

"You try to make me and Yuu work as janitors and I will skin you alive."

"You can't just—"

"Trust me, no one will ever find your goddamn body."

You cut him off, looking at him dead-in-the-eye, full of seriousness.

You're not about to get demoted into a janitor today, nuh uh.

Not now, not ever.

Crowley can go fuck himself.

"It's the responsibility of your goddamn school to compensate us for this situation and yet you try to make us into your errand boys? I gotta give you some credit man– I mean, that audacity is through the fucking roof!"

Crowley shrinks to himself a little bit, you may not be raising your voice but you're sure as hell figuratively spitting enough venom on him that it almost burns his skin. Looks like the years of mingling and having a pact with the avatar of pride is starting to pay off.

"Actually trying to get us to go around like servants at your beck at call?! You actually dare??"

"Like seriously? Do you have any idea how hectic my daily schedule already is? Because of your damn carriage I'm a whole world away from home! And yet you have the face to try and use us for labor like we wanted to be here?? How shameless can you be?!"

With each venomous spat of yours, Crowley shrinks more and more into himself as he starts fiddling with his fingers.

He takes quick glimpses of your 'Angry-Disappointed Asian Mom Pose™' and attempts to make himself look even more smaller.

• • • • •

After that verbal beat down, you calmed yourself and decided to be a part-time nurse of this school while Yuu can be your part-time assistant. Things will be easier if you're a part of the faculty, or will you be? you'll only be a part-timer after all... though, being a nurse in the infirmary is easier than running around in this campus sweeping floors and cleaning shit. You also need money to earn necessities. Ugh, what a pain...

You then decided to drag the now-too-timid Crowley by the ear straight into his office so that you two can discuss your paychecks. With written contracts and a witness.

. . . . . . .

. . . . .

. . .

.

"What happened here?"

You asked, seeing Yuu standing beside a charred statue as a ginger and a cat scrambled to get away, only to end up getting tied by Crowley's whip as the man scolds them and Yuu for some reason.

.

You can feel years of your lifespan being shaved off when the ginger (who you've learned had been the cause of this mess) had the audacity to be shocked that he's also going to be punished for the charring of the 'Queen of hearts' statue.

It looks like being absolutely shameless is a prerequisite to be enrolled in this goddamn college.

"Hold your horses crow-man, why is Yuu being punished when they weren't even involved in burning that damn statue?"

.

So... it turns out... You may have infected Yuu with your potty mouth and chronic bitchy-ness that Yuu is actually responsible for further escalating the fight between the ginger -Ace- and the cat -grim... srsly?- as by copying the way you speak and ended up immensely bruising Ace's ego with their insults... You don't know if you should be proud of that fact or not..

You turned to the headmaster.

"...Yuu cleans 15 windows. That's the most you can give them. You can give the rest of the 100 windows to the ginger and the cat."

"Oi!—" Ace tried to speak, only for Yuu to discreetly cover his mouth. Ain't no way they're letting Ace stop you from tryna lessen their cleaning sentence.

Crowley seems to want to say something so you spoke even quicker, raising your voice so that the students around can hear you.

"Those windows are taller than Yuu and I can ever dream to be in our entire lives. You aren't going to make a magicless human clean more than 15 of those things are you?"

*Close-eyed smile*

"Well—" Crowley sputtered.

"Oh who am I kidding! Of course you won't! You're a very gracious and benevolent headmaster, aren't you..? There's no way you'll risk straining and over-working a magicless minor over a mistake they didn't even directly cause, would you~?"

*Happily clasping your hands together*

"Erm..."

Crowley would've gone back to shrinking his frame and fiddling with his fingers if there weren't students around, the face you're making is just scaring him too much... That kind of smile that made him want to meet your expectations or else..

"Ahh~ I'm soo~ happy that kind people like you are in charge of the youth! Knowing a young one's limits and adjusting to them even if they've made a big mistake! You are such an amazing educator, headmaster!"

The students, Yuu, Grim and Ace stared blankly at you, gobsmacked – exasperated – flabbershamabergasted by the stunt you're pulling.

There's no way that would work right..?

. . . .

. . right??

Crowley clears his throat, thankful that more than half of his face is covered by his mask, lest his red face be seen by all.

"A- ah yes, you're absolutely right Mr. [L/n]. Th- there's no way I can be such a callous individual, Yuu shall clean 15 windows while Grim and Trapolla will clean the rest."

He said speedily before making a swift exit, looking like a chicken with his tail on fire.

You sharply gazed at the students around and opened your mouth.

"Any of you have a fuckin problem with us?"

Those words caused the other students to start speed-walking away and the Weasley-lookin-mf scrambled to free himself from Yuu's hand.

• • • • •

Heterochromia eyes gleamed from a shady corner near the statues of the great seven.

"Hehe~ looks like Azul is right to be interested with the little cone snail–chan~"

• • • • •

MC... please.. be safe.

We'll find you, don't worry..

Then we'll make sure that no one will take you from us ever again.

← Pr. 4 | Chapter List | Pr. 6 →

Don't forget to like, and reblog guys, it really helps me and gives me motivation :>

Elae: Thanks for reading this far y'all, I really appreciate all of you 🤭

See you guys next time. <3

@leviathans-tail-scales

@f0urleaf-cl0ver

Writing fanfics gives me momentary joy but getting a comment, like or reblog makes me even happier..

It makes me feel like I haven't wasted my time trying to serve out a chapter only for it to be unlikeable.

Time is life, people.

Literally.

Once an author uses their time to create chapters for you to enjoy, then please comment literally anything (even if it's just a heart emoji or screaming gibberish) and NEVER forget to reblog if you liked their work.

The time that the author used to create what you've read is something that they'll never be able to get back, after all..

So please.. Make our time worth using by showing that you appreciate our work and spreading it so it'll reach more people..

We'll be very grateful to you <3

I noticed that an amazing fic I read with over 60k words and over 900 kudos...didn't receive a single comment in 2022.

There were some comments in 2021, then a gap, then a few comments from this year. That is insane.

Ao3 is not built like Wattpad, it is not meant to be treated like the 'latest hits' page where you only read the new works, or where you only click on sort by number of kudos. It doesn't matter if the fic you like is not wip anymore - if you really like the story, comment. A simple heart will do. The author won't think you're annoying, in fact they'll probably be incredibly happy.

Fic authors don't deserve to have their work just disappear with no engament after few weeks pass. The fics don't deserve it either

This is Dazai all over again, like teacher like student -_-

hey fellas is it gay to stare at your rival whom you just met with pure wonder and awe???

hey fellas is it gay to rant about and relish in your rivals impressive feats?!?!

fellas?!?? IS IT????

*NOM* ....Mheheheheheh

Smolomon