26 posts
Vaggie: "Hello, Charlie's Girlfriend Speaking."
Vaggie: "Hello, Charlie's girlfriend speaking."
Husk: "Why the fuck do you always answer calls like that. This is your fucking phone."
Vaggie: "Yeah? And? I AM her fucking girlfriend, dumbass. She's only got one right now, so answering with that is just good as using my name."
Husk: "Just ask to use her last name already. This is stupid as shit."
Vaggie: "I, Charlie's girlfriend, am gonna have to say- fuck off."
Husk: "Chicken."
Vaggie: "Come at me when you're not still single, scaredy-cat."
Husk: "Like you don't have a ring."
Vaggie: "Like you don't practice having candlelight dinners-"
Husk: "How the FUCK do you know about th-"
Vaggie: "-same way YOU somehow know about the RING, you fucking-"
Angel Dust: "Both of you's know this is a conference call, right?"
Vaggie: "......"
Vaggie: "...Charlie..?"
Charlie: "Yes! Vaggie's future wi-"
Charlie: "-WHEEE HA I MEAN VAGGIE'S GIRL SPEAKING! FRIEND! GIRLFRIEND! Girlfriend of Vaggie who is CHARLIE! It's me I'm Charlie HI HELLO!!!"
Vaggie: "Sweetie, I love you."
Charlie: "I love you too! I love being your girlfriend and I DO- h, have a last name! I do. Have one of those."
Vaggie: "Right."
Charlie: "I have one."
Vaggie: "Good, cool. Hold that thought? I'll be right back."
Charlie: "Okay!!!"
Vaggie: (hangs up)
Vaggie, distantly in the hotel: " H U S K ! "
Husk: "Oh FUCK-" (CRASH) "-SHIT-"
(call ends)
(distant sounds of running and violence)
Angel Dust: "....."
Angel Dust: "Hey do-ray-mi-fa-so-la Charlie, I might not be datin' the guy, buuuut if your totally not future wife kills him I'm so not commin' to ya gay ass wedding."
Charlie: "....what if she just, MAIMS him a little?"
Angel Dust: "Ya serious?"
Charlie: "About marrying her???"
Angel Dust: (hangs up)
Charlie: "...Yes... yes I am~~"
Charlie: (cheerfully hangs up to go stop her gf from ruining their future wedding)
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