I Have Worked So HardTo Love Myself AgainAnd You Shall Not Let Me

I have worked so hard To love myself again And you shall not let me

they all told me i was much too dependent that the way that i loved was suffocating i began to believe it i held back my love and adoration when there was nothing wrong with my affection there never was

I hope that someday people will beg to read what i write

i finally feel that relief i was finally told it i finally know that i am not crazy

my heart thrummed when i heard of how they found him his neck in a grotesque position as he floated in that lake it is a miracle that he survived the night it shocks me even now that it wasnt what killed him

Queer I do not care what the person that i love is This individual trait supposedly makes me a part of a community However I do not feel that i belong there They are so proud and fierce This aspect of themselves  Seems to be far greater to them  Than mine is to me They accept this part of me But not who i am We are supposed to have this thing that binds us Yet it does not I still manage to be out of place surrounded by my own I do not have a place among the rest either No one seems to want me In regards to sex and love I have nowhere left to go This loneliness is no pleasure.