He/Him professionally gay and depressed, you know what to do do it with style | my name changes based on my vibes deal with it
915 posts
WAIT I DIDNT EVEN TBINK OF THIS
WAIT I DIDNT EVEN TBINK OF THIS
if I had a nickel for every time I met killer who liked knifes and had killer brother who had a detective boyfriend, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice
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More Posts from Imsaunteringvaguelydownwards
I think it’s interesting that their most famous album is losing ngl/gen
You can never listen to any of the songs on that album again, including demos and live versions
Fake dating Remus&Regulus AU, but they're not really fake dating - everyone just thinks they are.
They go to the Room of Requirement together to hang out and read in peace (where their loud, excitable, motivated best friends can't find and disturb them). The room transforms into a library with a nice fireplace and books they also wouldn't get access to otherwise.
At some point they start ranting to each other about their respective crushes, James and Sirius, while said crushes are moping that "Reggie and Moony" snuck off together again.
I did not expect to be so violently called out in every way possible but damn here I am
My BSD kins and why I kin them:
I don't actually have a lot but I wanted to make this list regardless
Dazai
I kin Dazai mostly because I'm a compulsive, pathological liar. When faced with a conflict, my first instinct is to lie. Regardless of who I'm lying to(myself, my family, my friends, etc). This habit has made me very good at lying. So much so that I have a tendency to manipulate and be dishonest to my friends and family in order to avoid them posessing negative views towards me. I don't like lying and I try not to, but I simply do not understand why it's bad.
On a deeper level, I kin Dazai because I'm constantly seeking for a reason to live. Everyday I wake up without motivation to do anything, and I go to sleep with dread that I will wake up the next day. Life is just an ongoing loop of meaningless events. I feel as though I have a gaping hole in my chest, and I constantly try to fill that hole with my lies. I make jokes about wanting to die and act childish around my friends as a coping mechanism. I constantly tell myself, "My friends and family really do care about me," but it simply does not work. I feel only capable of feeling empathy(not sympathy), because I can't understand other people's pain until I go through it myself. This results in my lack of understanding of why most morals are the way they are.
Chuuya
I kin Chuuya mostly because I'm short. I constantly get made fun of for my height and weight. I am forced to turn to violence on a weekly basis, simply because no one takes me seriously. I fear the appearance of weakness, so I either compress my emotions or express them in a form of anger. I have not cried in a year due to this. I talk about the people I care about a lot, but in a way that doesn't express my regard for them. Sometimes I'll call them when I'm not in my right mind, just to call them slurs(dont worry I can say them). They find this entertaining. I would sacrifice my reputation and risk everything to avenge my friends, even if it may not be possible at the moment.
Ranpo
Ranpo lower on the list because I don't kin him that much. Though I am not that intelligent, my intelligence is like Ranpo's. Instead of creating plans to reach my goals like Dazai and Fyodor does, I'm more able to notice patterns in behavior. This allows me to deduce certain things about people, including their insecurities, occupation, and type of intelligence. I used to be able to figure out people's class schedules back in high school using small clues I picked up in their dialogue.
Unfortunately, I still don't understand people. I constantly struggle to fit in and I don't know why. It feels like everyone gets each other while I'm just the outlier. I ache to be like everyone else, but I have accepted that such a thing is unachievable.
Nikolai
I kin Nikolai because I feel trapped. I feel like my emotions are limiting me. Being an HSP, I am more empathetic than normal. Actions that remind me of my own past experiences deeply effect me, and I want to be free from them. I don't want to feel emotional attachment, but I can't help it. Like Dazai, I constantly mask my emotions and appear to be childish and immature. I am a sadist, but I can't tell whether I actually feel pleasure in seeing other people's pain, or if it is just another lie I have convinced myself of to make myself feel more free.
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Side note: I've only read and watched bsd once so some of these might be wrong, please cut me some slack lmao.
my gender is either loverboy or whore and there is no in between