human equivalent of haunted bog water
662 posts
L0r3ll3 - Sakura - Tumblr Blog
Oh to be a rabbit eating blueberries
I thought i died a couple times and this is what i saw the last time before i ended up in front of the biggest tree ever. It had glowing runes on it and yea
Who ever thought it was a good idea to bring Furbies back, i hope youre at work and get diarrhea when its freezing cold, it runs down your leg freezing mid stream, creating what can only be described as a melting fudgesicle trouser disaster.
Apparently its been cold???
I discovered boudin and I feel like the ancestors just smacked my hand and went "that's not for you!!!"
It was so good but then I started coughing, throwing up and nearly shat myself, while sneezing and clucking my tongue to get the roof of my mouth to stop itching.
Feels like I got my cajun card revoked. Just drove up, snatched it out my hand, flipped me off and sped away.
I'm dying in my spirit because I want to visit family, but they have cats, and I'm allergic to cats😫
My allergies are already bad so I figured "why not, go big or go home" but my husband said "noooo" 😭😭😭
"Get back in here before you turn to ash" he said while guiding me back inside from getting fresh air while my ramen cooks. Do I pout? I dooooo 😭
My doctor recommended I check out something called "midnight sun" and I had the audacity to ask if it was Twilight... it's not.
Finally 30 and if there's any advice I'd like to give anyone younger, it's to take better care of yourself. No clowning. I hadn't thought I'd live this long, so I rode this vessel through hellfire.
Imagine being afraid of going to heaven as a child because you're afraid of clouds. My Godchild asked if I'm going to heaven or hell, I told him hell. He asked why and I straight up told him "I'm afraid of clouds". He followed up by saying "I going to hell too" so I asked why and he told me "pooping my pants".
There's a special place in hell for both of us and we'll be arriving there via Ms. Frizzles short bus.
You start to die after you're born but like when you hit 30, it starts to happen more rapidly
One day you're telling someone "watch me do a flip" and the next you're crab walking out of the store after bending down to retrieve something from the bottom shelf.
Kiss him goodnight❌️
Hide in the closet and chant "cucuy" at rising volumes✅️
2023: btw=by the way
1600s: btw=burn the witch
I don't think I could let my spouse romantically wash my hair without having to wash it myself after on the assumption that he would be too gentle. Sir, I need you to scrub it like a man who thinks he can scrub the syphilis off just by removing the first layer of skin. If I don't feel deafened by the amount of soap in my ears, what are we even doing?
Him:
You what still bothers me to this day....
I was 8 years old, the year was 2001 and I was taking a school exam.... geese, goose.... mouse, mice, moose, meese....
Yes, meese.
"Oh but that sounds like mouse" people would tell me. No. Mouse has mice, that's already plural so it wouldn't make any sense!! If goose is geese, why can't moose be meese??
It's madness. I got it wrong on the exam. Fools. All of them.
It's 2023 and I stand by meese.
Goose-geese, moose-meese
That is all.....
