8th House - Deepest Union Through The Purity Of Absolute Truth

8th house -  Deepest Union through the purity of Absolute Truth

The union in the 8th house occurs through a turbulent transformation, that takes place when our most cherished, personal ideals get confronted with intimate ideals of the other party. 

If we want to truly connect with another person, we need to learn how to merge both of these worlds together. We can’t live life forsaking either our sacred, internal principles (4th house) or people’s reactions to them (7th house). We need both of these parts of us to be preserved, so we need to learn how to reach a compromise, for the benefit of everyone involved. 

As a result, while some things have to die in the 8th house, something entirely new is formed here, when we have learned how to preserve our inner peace and stay true to ourselves (4th house), but still confront our intimate world with the outside through exposing it in connections with others (7th house). We give birth to the 8th house theme of shared values and resources. The 8th house reflects Scorpio themes of Mars and Pluto. Here, we shed our skin while refining ourselves, like polishing a diamond in the rough. You don’t throw the precious stone away, but you chisel away at it with determination (Mars), until you can in good conscience feel that purity of absolute truth (Pluto).

The 8th house, as a water house is very sensitive to natural rhythms of the Earth and cyclical changes, that also reflect in human beings. The transformation that occurs here is not a one time process, but an experience we are always forced to return to, being a very necessary step to the feeling of enlightenment and divine presence, that occurs in the 9th house. 

Our minds and souls are always gradually, yet constantly changing and evolving, so to truly remain united with another person, both parties must continuously purify themselves from any insincerity, and stay in tune with themselves and each other, in accordance with the personal growth of both parties. For people with personal planets in the 8th house, this purging process lasts a lifetime.

“It is already hard enough to understand what someone is saying. Discussion is just an exercise in narcissism where everyone takes turns showing off. Very quickly, you no longer have any idea what is being discussed.”

— Gilles Deleuze, Two Regimes of Madness: Texts and Interviews 1975-1995

2nd and 8th House Polarity - Material vs Emotional Realism

Among all the houses in the zodiac wheel, the 2nd-8th house axis is the one linked to both material and spiritual foundation of the human life. While the fact of the 2nd house linked to basic physical survivability is commonly talked about, the emotional realism of the 8th house contrasted with the equally practical 2nd house is something that is less commonly talked about, as the talks of the mystical and dangerous nature of the 8th house overtake the discussions about the true meaning of its energy.

Let's start with the 2nd house and its meaning. The 2nd house rules our basic, individual practical habits. It's basic physical survivability. It's our simplest physical routine, needs, preferences and desires that support our identity and our physical body, that long term end up contributing to the bigger picture of our mental and emotional health. Which is why the 2nd house also rules the physical act of putting food into our mouths and basic nourishment. The 2nd house understands, that the little things we do throughout the day, the small practical choices we make are the foundation of our basic self, and will long term contribute to our general well being. The 2nd house understands the foundational realism, that the basic physical actions we perform influence and control how we feel emotionally on a deeper level. This is how the 2nd house links to the 8th house and instinctively connects to it.

These houses, however, are interconnected polarities, which means that the influence is mutual and directly proportionate. That means the 8th house influences the 2nd house just as much as the 2nd house influences the 8th. That means the 8th house contains just as much foundational realism as the 2nd house does, but at the opposite end of the spectrum. The difference in the spectrum is that the 2nd house represents individual actions concerning solely our physical body, due to it supporting the basic 1st house of self, while the 8th house represents the union of two physical bodies, due to it supporting the 7th house of interactions with another.

The 8th house teaches us, that how others related to us since childhood has formed how we fundamentally perceive ourselves. That there is essentially no such thing as being an individual unit separated from another, because every single personal habit we have ever formed has been given to us by another, and we are always constantly externally stimulated, and thus form our personal habits based on other people's energetic influence. The reality of the 2nd house is how the power of the self can influence another, which is why it's also linked to speech, but the power of the 8th house is understanding how another's influence seeps into our subconscious mind and creates our individual perception. So while the 2nd house gives us mastery of practical realism about how our small physical habits can make or break our emotional and mental health, the 8th house gives us mastery of emotional realism on how our overall emotional state dictates the nature of the physical habits that we allow into our daily routine.

The tricky part of the 8th house, is that while the 2nd house habits are more obviously visible, the emotional motivations of the 8th house are of a more profound nature, and thus in theory take more digging and work to explore. However, the house polarity exists for a reason and that reason is to help us. If you want to check on the state of your emotional well being, observe your physical habits. Do you struggle to get up in the morning? Is your routine compulsive, or conducive to your overall well-being? Is there a looming sense of panic behind your tightly formed schedule? Conversely, if you want to assess the validity of your practical routine, look at your emotional state. Are you feeling anxious or not grounded? Do you experience a permanent loss of feeling of safety? Are you feeling emotionally chaotic, is there an inherent feeling of a volatile influence on your daily life, a sense of panic you struggle to get a hold of? While these things of course also indicate a deeper emotional problem, they can point to what you can change that doesn't work in your daily routine, that is a practical reflection of your emotional turmoil. Through consciously introducing healthy physical habits, while you can't bypass solving the essence of a deep psychological problem, you can develop a routine, that is more conducive towards creating a feeling of peace.

If you have any planets, especially difficult ones, placed in the 2nd-8th house axis, the struggle represented here will be a major theme of your life. The 2nd house especially may feel rudimentary, but I assure you that with malefics placed there, it is a journey to discover even such simple energies. To give you a personal example, I have North Node placed in the 2nd house and it took me almost 30 years of my life to observe how my eating schedule, or a lack of food in the fridge, contributes to experiencing a feeling of emotional anxiety, as I tended to dwell on it in my head instead of simply assuring myself basic physical comfort.

In the 2nd - 8th house axis, there is a delicate balance between managing both your physical and emotional support system, that is nuanced and interchangeable, intricately woven. One can't exist without another. The realism of these houses indicates understanding, how catering to both our emotional and physical needs is necessary to realise either of them. A good example of them is looking at how we need speech (2nd house) to be able to express our deepest feelings and satisfy our emotional needs (8th house), but also, the reason why we even bother to speak to other human beings at all, is because we have a foundational emotional need to connect to them.

Maturity in realism of fulfilment of our basic needs in life is achieved, when we learn how to integrate both of these houses in our daily practice and truly gain an understanding of our individual preferences in this department. You can't achieve realism without the 8th house. That is why this house is also linked with crisis situations, because a crisis occurs when we have neglected our basic emotional survival need to the point our body responds with a warning signal to let us know what is happening. But in reality, creating crisis situations is already a sign of mismanagement of the 8th house. Because if the realism of the 8th house is managed well, we have constant access to dwell within its depths and assure ourselves with basic fulfilment of our emotional desires, and no need for a crisis to occur and remind us who we really are.

Ladies with Venus 8h

Make sure you date someone who's not already secretly dating someone else

By the time you find out, you are neck deep in emotions

It may drive you crazy to the point of psychosis to wipe the memory clean and begin afresh

Because when you give yourself to someone, you give without thinking

Also, for you ladies the rules are reversed. While other women may love the man equally or do a lot of things for the man or as we see in media that women sing and flirt with man playfully

You ladies, on the other hand, attract equally intense and "complex" man. He may either be evolved or unevolved. If unevolved, he will lose interest the moment you show him that you love him too (so frustrating)

Unevolved Scorpionic man are chasers, hunters, driven by power and do not have understanding of their emotional turmoils. They simply suppress them or project their emotions on you

So when dealing with man, if you can afford to do some emotional control and realize that your life theme runs in OPPOSITE direction of general dating rules, you will not feel confused and overwhelmed

As for your man, I think he needs to ride out his insecurities. When he is evolved, he will feel safe in his worth and not walk on eggshells around you but only when he evolves and finds connection with something larger than life

8th house Relationship Needs

It's absolutely hilarious how you can get distracted from your own natural needs and desires based on how your equivalent of this energy most commonly manifests in an average person or relationships you have been in. I realised today that I have been unaware of my 8th house desires and perceptions of human relationships, because most people tend not to handle the 8th house well themselves...so it hit me by proxy and made me blind for a long time to my actual preferences, because I thought other people's low behaviour was the norm, and so I must also be low myself. Then I realised I was in pain precisely because I don't like these lower dynamics at all, and that is what brought me so much suffering. Go figure.

I have made posts on the 8th house before, so you know of my intuitive understanding of it's energies. But somehow I have underestimated how these needs translate into my own emotional and practical life...because from my experience they tended to manifest into something toxic that I never actually wanted to begin with.

When you have energies of the 8th house related to your chart ruler, and your chart ruler is Venus, which is linked to your relationships, there is a natural craving for a high level of deep bonding and high intensity of that bond in your life. This can also manifest strongly if any of your main luminaries or Lagna Lord is in the 8th house as well. Even though I only have one 8th house placement, since it's linked to the ascendant lord I relate to it very strongly. Yet it took me so many years to be able to determine the actual functioning of its energies an how it translates into what I want in my life.

The 8th house is very powerful, but it is a difficult spot in the zodiac wheel. It's not for the faint of heart. When people have placements that are difficult for them...it often turns out to be only too easy to succumb into the lower nature of its expression.

I could simplify things and just label the 8th house as dark, dangerous, bad, prone to toxicity, all the things commonly said about it in Astrology circles. I tried to do that in the past, even trying to tell myself I'm ok with such a classification. But deep in my heart I can't agree with that, and I don't want to. I was born with a pure understanding of 8th house energies through my South Node talents for a reason, and the realisation of my desires relative to experiencing the 8th house energies reflect this purity of understanding.

Say what you want about an 8th houser, but I don't like toxic, controlling or unhealthy relationships. I never liked them, and I never wanted them, and I was always unhappy being part of any toxicity. I desire the most refined, pure version of what the 8th house connection can offer. I want deep intimacy without entrapment. I want passion and intensity without heartbreak. I want transparent communication without issues of control, deception and unleashing of unconscious negativity. I want to be able to achieve even more intimacy by talking through this negativity in a civil way when it already comes up. I want that raw emotional experience, that only two people who are completely bare with each other can provide, without needing to feel like it's part of an unhealthy dynamic.

You have to be conscious of and discuss each other's shadow side in order to achieve intimacy in a relationship. That's true. It won't always be perfectly pretty as emotions can run high when triggered, and that is true as well. But it is perfectly possible to have this experience of going to the bottom of the abyss together and returning more whole each time without delivering low blows and doing and saying things below the belt out of fear of vulnerability. Sadly, most people when touched that deeply, tend to try to unleash anger or manipulation and control mechanisms. But it is possible to explore the depths of the mind, heart and soul of another without being destructive in a way that serves no purpose, and can even sabotage the whole intimacy of the connection. It is possible to work through it, even if it's hard. It is possible to have a stable connection even with all these intense energies, without trying to "get out" of the bond due to some triggers or trying to keep side options to avoid the transformation the 8th house requires of us. It is possible, and if I did all of the above, others can do it too.

I have been told many times that it's my fault that I have had relationship difficulties, when people have yet again acted with me in questionable ways, simply because I was not afraid to approach potentially "dangerous" territory...simply by being honest and uncompromising and demanding something truly meaningful for myself. I don't believe in aiming for perfection, but I believe it is possible to have something real without it being completely messed up, even if you have to examine each other's dysfunctions. And that is the only type of relationship I wanted to sign up for to begin with.

Death

Death belongs to the realm of faith.

You are right to believe you will die.

It sustains you.

If you didn't believe it, could you bear the life you have?

If we could not totally rely on the certainty that it will end, how could you bear all this?

Nevertheless, it is only a matter of faith.

And the worst thing about it is that you are not sure.