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PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT SERIES: 8th house and psychosis. Trigger: mental health

This is my understanding of "psychosis" that happens to 8th house natives. I have venus in 8th house & I experienced psychosis. Carl Jung had sun in 8th house, his psychosis is well known. Friedrich Nietzsche was scorpio rising with rahu and moon in 1st house & sun in 12th house in libra. More on this later but today let us discuss psychosis. From my understanding, it is triggered by two things: planet and time period of the house ruler. Venus in 8th psychosis is triggered by romantic relationship. Sun in 8th house by father? Moon in 8th house by mother? My understanding on this is not clear but I have definitely experienced the relationship and mom connection (venus + moon in 8th house). Next comes, time period of 8th house ruler. My 8th house is ruled by Gemini and my psychosis was triggered in mercury antardasha because it probably activated the 8th house. Someone with pisces ruling 8th house will be activated in Jupiter mahadasha or antardasha etc.

What exactly happens during psychosis? Since 8th house is to do with intense emotions, these natives go back and forth highs and lows to the extreme levels throughout the day. Psychosis occurs when they are overwhelmed by the unconscious content and have a weak & insecure ego. It happens either in early youth years or when they have not dealt with a challenge before in life or unprecedented misfortune. For eg, if venus in 8th house is in relationship, she will be her usual rollercoaster emotional ride. 8th house will bring a not suitable person to life. Native is her usual intense self but the romantic lover causes many emotional and mental issues by lying, manipulation, inconsistent behavior etc. This gradually drives the native to emotional distress. There comes a flood of negative emotions in them like extreme anxiety, fear and panic. They start obsessing about the whole thing to the point of mental breakdown. Since they are young, naive, early age or inexperienced, this emotional distress is too mentally and physically draining to live in. It gets harder and harder to live life in a hyper emotional state every day. This is when native starts to isolate herself.

Then occurs psychotic break. It is when the native starts to perceive reality differently and lives in delusions. For eg, delusion like I am pregnant or I am being stalked or somebody is trying to hurt me, seeing mental images of people hurting them and ridiculing them. The last one happened to me. This is very frightening and confusing to native. She does not know how to explain the strange things happening to her.

Then happens spiritual awakening. Something in her pulls her to occult and related things or psychology or therapy or hospital or anything else as per life path. Next step is the reordering of her psychic world which blends delusion and reality. Which means she has to face the trauma from her past and heal herself. Synchronicities begin to happen. Unlearn the trauma and relearn new things. 8th housers are called BRAVE SURVIVORS for this reason.

Depression and psychosis wipe her memory clean. Time to integrate the parts of herself now coming to consciousness. What parts? Shadow, animus, parts of herself she did not know she was, changing the old habits, changing the hobbies, career etc. These things are very crucial to mental development. We often hear "eh school sucks, I hate democracy, why do we have to do job.." but try living in jungle doing nothing & you will realize how system, rituals, patterns, routine, order are very important psychological needs. They are not just manmade institutions but strong psychological impulses.

Time to fix what is broken. Make peace with your childhood trauma. Acknowledge everything you hate in yourself and give it time (months, years) to integrate and heal. Read more about it in books because I cannot go into detail here.

Also, strengthen your ego. Intense women lack strong ego. Ego means self identity. Assertiveness. Stand up for yourself and your rights. Ego means to achieve or try to achieve your highest potential. There is no other way to live a fulfilling life. Ego means to putting yourself first, not being doormat and clingy.

This psychosis is life changing, catastrophic, sudden, unpredictable, similar to death and rebirth. It is the shedding of previous reality and creation of a new reality. It is why 8th housers say "I have lived so many lives in one lifetime."

Once they have overcome this psychosis, their ego is better able to handle next bouts of intense negative emotions and handle them positively with physical, intellectual, mental efforts. They also attract better quality of people in their lives because people can sense their maturity and character. 8th house still brings sudden twists and turns but they are able to handle that.

I personally went from browsing nonsense porn to turning pages of philosophy books. It is total life changing self development work. Painful but very rewarding.

What is seen cannot be unseen.

The first half of life is when you are unconscious, unaware and ignorant. When the gates of 8th house open, everything you knew about life is revealed to you. On emotional, mental, physical plane, secrets are revealed to you. Secret personalities, secret character, secret identity, lies and manipulation. Mental frameworks are broken, presuppositions are ruined, "everything I knew about the world and people was wrong".

What is seen cannot be unseen. You cannot be the same blindfolded native you were before. How careless, intense and emotional you were. Living on auto pilot. Before you know, your life shatters to pieces. Gifted with sharp intuition, you KNOW you have to transform. Memories of past come up to surface, emotionally overwhelmed and confused by "what just happened", you run towards the door but it seems the force is not in your control. What do I do? Where should i go? Help.. Help! Fear not, synchronicities will guide your way. Fateful detours guide your way. Inner reflection begins, childhood traumas are healed, you have the intuition to see through the mask of people. To the outside world, you appear to be lost and broken. But on the inside, you KNOW you are walking the path you were deatined to walk.

You are just not the same person anymore. You are a wounded healer. Relationships change. You are changed forever. You change your thought patterns, emotional reactions and identity. You begin to control the chaos that once controlled you. People say "you are different now, something has changed in you". You are threatening and fierce. You are resilient and reliable. New life begins, new people enter life, new chapter unfolds.

Deep down in your heart, you remember the person you were before. Longing to be that naive, infantile and careless person. You have seen the bad and the dark. You cannot unsee the bad and the dark. Life does not feel the same anymore.

Self development series: learning to handle life.

For 8th housers, scorpio placements - stretch to cancer, pisces placements and risings.

*knocks* Hello, astro world, it's me.. look at my birth chart please and tell me what's wrong with me? Why is my life a mess..? Why do I attract such narcissistic, controlling, manipulative people in my life? Why do i feel like I dont exist and am constantly transforming..? I have a weird relationship with my family.. I have so much trauma... I just want answers...

Just a regular day in the life of natives with vulnerable placements. Until they heal their trauma (which can take years), they would not know how to handle their life. How to not fuck up their relationships, mood, reactions, career, body, mind. The hidden gift of these natives is to be in touch with their insticts and emotional life. They do not just exist but are in tune with their emotional states. When unevolved, they act on their impulses, feelings, imagination, thoughts mindlessly.

When evolved, they have a conscious control over their impulses, feelings, imagination and fantasies. This is a gradual process, not overnight, and one filled with many trials, challenges and fallings. Contrary to the stereotypes, these natives are not doomed to be crybabies/crazy all their lives. They certainly can handle their life, depending upon the whole chart, timing of planets and the luck.

The trick is to know when to be rational and when to let loose. The trick is to change your lifestyle in such a way as accommodates things you can control. For eg, do not buy tubs of ice cream if you know you binge eat in maniac state. The trick is to live in the flow, be in the flow of life, mindfulness comes naturally to you when you are not giving in to every self destructive impulse. The trick is to set values for yourself. For eg, do not do casual hookup if you know you will get attached and obsessive. The trick is to hold yourself to higher standards of behaviour. The trick is to find fellow similar/compatible placement natives who will make your life a little easier. The trick is to become aware of your own inner narcissist and stop feeding him/her what they crave, instead choose the opposite action.

There is a thin line between chaos and order, that these natives know very well of. Sometimes they feel like they do not belong to this world, they are misfits, as if they want to go back to home. As if they daily life is very harsh and tiresome to them. Beware not to fall into the grips of substance abuse and/or criminal gangs. At the end of the day, you are responsible for your life. You have to live anyway, so why not make it worthwhile?

"Everything of which I know, but of which I am not at the moment thinking; everything of which I was once conscious but have now forgotten; every thing perceived by my senses, but not noted by my conscious mind; and everything which, involuntarily and without paying attention to it, I feel, think, remember, want, and do; all the future things that are taking shape in me and will sometime come to consciousness: all this is the content of the unconscious." - On the Nature of the Psyche, The Structure and Dynamics of the Psyche, CW 8, par. 382.

Obsessions for 8th Housers?

Do 8th housers get obsessed with someone and stay obsessed for years? It may not be romantic interest but even someone who displays the traits and emotions that the native embodies inside - quite literally the shadow work.

It happens in their life that they often get obsessed with someone, thinking about them all the time, when they speak they only speak about that person, they cannot even attempt to think about someone else, their emotions are tied to that person's behaviour, their memory is flooded with that person, they think about all the conversations with them and all the encounters with them, they make up scenarios in their head, begin their day with that person and end with that person. The subject of their obsession may not even know that the native is obsessed with them, native pretends everything is normal on the outside but secretly inside they are obsessing over that one person like crazy

You would wonder what the hell is this? Is it something deeply psychological issue? It turns out that these natives get obsessed with people who have something in their physical or material life that the native lacks but wants to have. 8th house deals with intense emotions and envy too is felt intensely. They are often not happy at the success of others and may even feel envious of other people's accomplishments. 8th house is psychologically complicated for a reason. If the native does not have certain things in life, he feels envious and bitter against someone who does have that thing. It could be something like respect in society, powerful job, elite lifestyle, somebody's looks or intelligence.

The natives may not even realize they are doing it and since envying someone is frowned upon socially as ethically incorrect, they feel ashamed of their emotions and add to the self-sabotage. That something is wrong with them or that they are a bad person for envying someone else's good fortune. Even talking about this behaviour is taboo because who wants to admit that they are an envious and greedy person? The envy is not unfounded because in - the material world a lot of people compete for few resources so most people are bound to lack the resources; - not everyone starts from the same point in life; - not everyone has the same natural inclination or potential; - not everyone wins the genetic lottery or is exceptionally lucky; - not everyone has the required intelligence or ability to understand concepts. The usual things that successful people say "I am here because I worked hard, the harder I work the luckier I get" is not quite correct because our decisions, choices, thoughts, instincts, impulses, motivations are often unconscious and only make sense in the hindsight. They also underestimate the extreme luck they had to beat the competition and know the right method that makes them successful at something.

On top of that, many of them go on to flash, rub it in other's faces, identify with their success and use it for hierarchy control. That others are inferior to them, "you are an inferior human because you are not as successful as me". Often they do it unconsciously because they do not realize it is their insecurities and inferiority complexes, despite the success, that they still want to prove themselves to others and maintain their dominance over others. It is true that not everyone who gets successful in life is capable of handling that success emotionally, it goes to their head, they become arrogant and flamboyant, they are convinced that they are great and special, that they know better than others, that they must be better humans with better karma. This is no surprise, what I am telling is the insights I have observed over the years.

Take this astrology page, for example. I know astrology because it was a natural impulse in me, it is easier for me to understand the language of astrology than others who are simply not meant for it, since it is my natural interest I also spend a lot of time thinking about it so I automatically get better at it naturally, for some reason I was born with the genetic lottery in occult and a natal chart with karmic influences in the field of occult. None of my family members are into astrology and some of them do not even know the basics. Astrology is like Spanish to them, completely dumbfounded they are when they see the birth chart. Does this mean I am a better human than them because I understand something they do not? Can I use the astrological knowledge to dominate and show off to others? No, that is arrogance, pride, being self-important and being delusional that my astrology knowledge is something I willed. I did not will it, it happened to me. And it is not permanent and eternal, I will die someday and with that my astrology gifts will end too. It is my purpose for this lifetime, not eternally giving.

For these reasons, 8th house is the shadowy and complicated thing that we do not understand on the surface. How easy it is to slip into entanglements of pride, ego, arrogance, possession over your material accomplishments. What we do not realize is that behind the glamour of success is deep fear of uncertainty, insecurity, lack of agency over one's life and fear of losing everything they have gained in life. Fear of losing good fortune makes someone dominate others so nobody else takes their place, become arrogant because internally they do not believe they actually deserve their good fortune, manipulate and misguide others so they do not become successful like them, build a brand for themselves so they leave a legacy and remain important even after death, they try to act like they know the secrets of success because they cannot digest that their success might just be a fluke or gamble of luck.

However, if these tendencies are ignored and dismissed, they bottle up inside and inflate the native's ego. With transition to 8th house or activation of 8th house in its ruler's dasha, this inflated ego is threatened and forced to collapse, undergo change and transform. The end result is to gradually realize that ego is merely an attachment to material form but what we forget to see is the wholeness of Self beyond the ego. When you go beyond "I, my, mine, myself", you realize that you are a nameless, faceless and invisible something. How scary is it to be a nothing in nowhere as a nobody! So you cling to the past, identity, material life, out of fear that you will never come back from the underworld.

So the obsessions that happen to 8th housers are indication of personal issues that native denies. For eg, it may be someone you deeply hate, even the way they talk just disgusts you, the way they move sends chills down your spine, you hate their vibes and how selfish they are. But at the same time, you are obsessed with them, does this person deserve your obsession? No. But can you shake it off? Not unless you accept the hard truth that you are just as selfish, deceitful, egotistical as the subject of your obsession. The rule of 8th house is that awareness and consciousness will set you free while denial and refusal to look into the shadow will keep you trapped.

Similarly, if you are envious of someone's fortune, can you identify your insecurities and label them? Can you achieve that fortune in some way? If not, can you adjust your perception around it? Often feelings are the guiding lights in this house. What no one can tell you, you feel your way through it. Here is no guru and no mentor, here is you and your feelings. That is why being in tune with your feelings is painful, mentally uncomfortable and tiring but essential task for 8th housers. Lucky are those who identify this psychological hurdle. There are many 8th housers who never realize that they can solve their own problems with change of perception or becoming more conscious of their feelings. Often, the obsessions with people will end when you are self-aware and witnessing your feelings, no matter how uncomfortable they are.

Death

Death belongs to the realm of faith.

You are right to believe you will die.

It sustains you.

If you didn't believe it, could you bear the life you have?

If we could not totally rely on the certainty that it will end, how could you bear all this?

Nevertheless, it is only a matter of faith.

And the worst thing about it is that you are not sure.

Confessions of Scorpio moon 🌙

I am ashamed of myself for doing everything I possibly could do to make you stay. To make you love me. To fight for your attention. Even in those weak moments when I knew that I deserved so much better than a lost soul who didn’t acknowledge how many hearts they were breaking. I knew exactly how cruel and selfish you were. And yet, I decided to stay. I don’t know why. Cause I never believed I could have you. The closest I could get to being a part of your life was by being your punching bag, or a friend you’d text whenever you were bored. I became the entertainment you needed in your life, but to me, you always were a star shining so bright in the sky, I wouldn’t mind freezing to death if it meant I could gaze at you all night. Little did I know, there were many more eyeing you. I probably was the last person in your priority list. Or maybe not that either. I don’t want to know the answer, I think it’ll break my heart. I try to sound rational, but I really let you break my heart a hundred times, did I not? Well, atleast there’s nothing left that can be broken anymore. I think about you so much, it’s crazy how I can’t get a grip on my fucking self. I wonder if you miss me. I know it’s so strange to think about you. I have so many questions to ask, but I’m not sure if my heart wants to know the answers anymore. I tear up whenever I think about you, rather about the love I had for you. I wish I could be a part of your life and didn’t just fade away. I was barely in the background anyway. I know I’ve acted in ugly ways and I hate how low I had stooped to get you to notice me, to pay attention to me and to give me some of your affection. I never understood what I lacked. Did I lack something? I remember you calling me mean and irritating. I have tried my best to overcome those in the last two years. I don’t know why I cared so much about your opinion of me. I remember you calling me problematic. Was I really problematic? Did you know how insecure I felt everytime you spoke about a new fling, or a new crush? I wouldn’t share you even with a fictional character. That’s probably my insecurity speaking but yeah. I don’t get to read your poems anymore. I wish I did. You have the gift of gab. Do you still write poetry? How have you been lately? I don’t want to make any small talk. I miss our deep conversations. I hope you’ve been able to heal. The idea of letting you go still scares me. But I’ve understood through therapy that letting me go is scarier. I wish we didn’t drift apart. I guess, we weren’t meant to be anyway. I cherish everything we had. I am trying to master detachment. Are you holding onto me tightly too? Cause there’s a reason I’m unable to let you go. I will though. Cause you’re gone. I don’t know if we’ll ever meet again. I don’t know if I want to. I don’t know anything. Why has loving you been such a painful experience even though you are so lovable? I hope no one’s hurt you when I was not around. Please protect your heart. You are precious. You deserve to heal. I wish healing onto you. I hope your inner child feels safe with you. If you have landed a job in these past few years, I want to congratulate you. I knew you were built for great things. And oh hey, belated happy birthday to you. I hope you had a blast. I am happy for you. I hope you continue to do amazing things in the future. Lastly, I hope you find the courage to be yourself. Know that you are loved. And ummm….. missed. Yeah, that’s it. Bye.