Rising Like The Phoenix

Rising like the phoenix

🌸 Especially for 8th housers.

🌸 So far we know that 8th housers are traumatizing placements. We know that they meet bad people in life. We know that they face unpredictable life events. We know that they are prone to neurosis. We know that they build themselves up from the ashes. Especially after rock bottom. They yearn for the person they were before. The naive emotional and carefree person. The person who never thought twice before taking a decision. The person who was so careless with their heart and emotions. The innocent. The child. Too gullible. Too trusting. They yearn to be that person again because it just felt so good in past, before they were aware of masks, hidden colours of people and ulterior motives.

🌸 What I want to talk about is CODEPENDENCY. If you are in a mental state to understand this, the reason why bad people came into your life was because you were a codependent. A bad one at that. All of us are influenced by the energy of the people we surround ourselves with. Energy and emotions are infectious and contagious. Given the 8th house placements their emotions are already extreme and when something good happens (a new friendship or relationship or even going to grocery) they are really very pretty seriously happy. They are happy in their bones and soul and cells and every atom in their body. That is just who they are. So when the betrayal and shock happens, it hits them hard like every atom in their body is collapsing. This is why they are transformed deeply after every betrayal.

🌸 But what does one have to do after rock bottom? You are in neurosis. You know you have to change your attitude towards life. You have to change your habits. You have to change your emotional reaction. It takes time, I know, it can take years. It is not easy to heal for 8th housers. But you should know what you are doing. You are healing your codependency issues. The person you yearn for was a codependent person. For every narcissistic sociopath there is a codependent. As simple as that. You were codependent because you lacked self worth. your self esteem depended on the words, opinions and judgments of other people. Your mood depended on the mood of other people. You let others take decisions for yourself. I am not victim blaming but it is to understand who you were before. Life has given you an opportunity to fix your codependency issues. You dont want to become a codependent again. Do you?

🌸 An infantile and immature childish codependent person you were living in a womblike state chasing a paradise. 8th house/scorpio/pluto are very bold teachers. But rest assured they will bring to your consciousness your own hidden flaws. In a toxic family line there are abusers and abused - both are magnets to each other - for every narcissist there is a codependent. You might think "I am not codependent, hell naw" but you are. Just dont be in denial. This is the silver lining in your neurosis.

🌸 Healing from codependency is not sunshine and roses. It is not aesthetics. It is not fruits and flowers. It is simple learning and practice. Learning from your mistakes. Learn from youtube, internet articles, books, write, journal, record yourself speaking in voice notes, make videos of yourself, it is about learning skills. Social media makes it look like healing is pretty and beautiful mess. But it is not like that. It is taking 3 steps but slipping 2 back. It is relapsing to old patterns. It is sudden insights and intuition. It is running in circles and ruminating. It is exhausting and tiring and frustrating. You just want it to be over so that you can start living your life like a normal person.

🌸 You are now a wounded healer. A wounded physician. A doctor without a degree - doctor of souls. You feel an urge to help others. Heal others. Like Chiron who could not heal himself but healed other people. Only a wounded soul can heal another soul. It is an experiment. Dont confuse that you be a saviour complex and put yourself in trauma again. But it is to make authentic connection with another soul and do your project together. Perhaps it is now your destiny to merge with other because your poison is your medicine too. This is why all 8th housers are pulled to occult, shaman, astrology, psychology because they want to heal others. It is their task. Their presence is now calming. They are a wise person. If you are 8th houser and you healed some major trauma you know that the only way out is to accept your wounds. To accept your flaws which in this case is codependency issues. It will make you feel powerful over yourself. You wont feel helpless powerless and hopeless. You have to diagnose your spiritual illness that is codependency. Simultaneously, you live a private life. Away from social media and make believe. It is a typical pattern. Just know you are not alone.

Scorpio/8th house dominant/stellium: Social circle.

Jaded, cynical, skeptical, guarded, high boundaries: That's how we describe an evolved scorpion/8th houser. They have seen a lot of bad stuff in life. They choose their social circle wisely.

Superficial parametres like looks, fame, titles, tags, money are byproduct of one thing - character. It does not matter to them that you are a high achiever unless you reflect that in your character.

Just-world fallacy is a cognitive bias which assumes that good things happen to good people and bad things happen to bad people. That what you get is what you deserve. That a successful person must deserve their success. An evolved scorpion just does not believe in this. They have seen far too many successful people with bad characters.

Scorpions choose their social circles based on character not external success. They choose people who are emotionally mature, self aware, know their emotional patterns, can self reflect and choose their behaviour. Scorpion has no time for immature people and they do not care for people pleasing. An evolved scorpion knows that a person who values a goal bigger than themselves can make money as a byproduct of their interest. They choose a doctor who actually genuinely enjoys studying, learning, helping people as a friend over a doctor who is just in the profession for title and money. Mars as the ruler of scorpio gives them the potential to perform and achieve their goals, but for the right reasons.

With sorpions, what you see is what you get. They are both emotional and rational. They are intuitive, thinkers and rationalize. An evolved scorpion is a lone warrior, on the hero's journey, no energy for drama and gossip, no time for toxicity and superficiality. This is because they intuitively know that life has to have a meaning. They do not merely live for pleasures. They live for purpose and dedication.

How so? Scorpion/8th house are both connected to strong libido energy. An unevolved scorpion can be a fuckboy, wasted, chaotic, problematic person. But an evolved scorpion is the anti-thesis. Libido as a life force, creative energy, kundalini, awakening, initiation, enlightenment, inner wisdom is what drives them. Many scorpion are also into occult subjects, but even without occult they are definitely into psychological exploration and philosophy.

Sigmund Freud has described libido as the instinctual physiological or psychic energy associated with sexual urges and, in his later writings, with all constructive human activity. This libido is the strength of an evolved scorpion because they are the ones who are most in touch with their conscience. Why scorpion? All signs can read astrology but nobody does it like scorpion. It is just like that. All signs have their innate qualities which share many similarities with others, mutually, but there is something about scorpion which sets them apart. This is where their reputation of dark, mysterious and psychic comes from, because they are internally judging others for all signs of character flaws and defects.

Their authenticity is remarkable. They keep their persona as close to the Self as possible. They like to live by their true values and the instincts. You cannot make them choose to be inauthentic at gun point. This is why they are also very conscious of karma and moral compass. They speak what they internally believe to be true and therefore they befriend those who are also on the quest for self knowledge.

Falling in love as a water dominant native

Inner planets (moon/sun/venus/mercury/mars) in a water house or water sign - love is different to you. You want to be with someone with whom you can be yourself and just yourself. Truly yourself. With all your feelings and vulnerabilities laid on the table, you are that safe and secure with your lover.

Water house or water sign placements make the native sensitive. Sensitive is to feel the feelings to their extreme. It is like holding a bubble in your palm, worried someone might pinch it, alert someone might blow it. You do not open yourself up to someone unless you trust their character.

Loyalty and honesty means a lot to you. You want someone as transparent as the water. You want to see through them. While other people look with their eyes, you look with your soul. Your eyes are turned inwards and constantly see the ups and downs of your emotions. Being sensitive and emotional, you are drawn to spirituality and choose your own path in life. You strive for a purpose in life. You want to know why you were born here on earth. You need a sense of mission and direction. You are a giver in love, the more you share your love, the more love there is in the world. You strive for higher principles, morals, meaning and values. You are the ones to turn the pages of philosophy books because the exterior life just does not suit your taste.

You fall in love with your soul. You meet someone and they are just the right person. Your intuition (water) tells you, this is it, you cannot reason why or how this person becomes the most prioritized person in your life. You are naturally obsessive. You are thinking of all the things you want to tell them, share with them, listen to them. Their mind, emotions and soul are your adventure place. You want to explore the depths of their mind. You want to merge your soul and identity with this person in your life.

Love is not just a word to you, it is life itself. Men with water dominant energy appear so ordinary from the outside, but oh-the right person will see the glaciers and ocean behind that mask. This ocean contains the secrets of the world. You want to self actualize with your lover. Someone who assists you in this journey. It is not just a material love to you, it is rather spiritual. You value their soul, their spirit, their essence. Love is a sacrifice to you, a noble cause, a martyr.

Perhaps, love is the language of water dominant natives. It is their religion and their philosophy. You will realize that this love trascends personality and unites with God, the eternal and the source. Nobody loves like a water dominant native, especially an evolved and mature one. They make life heaven, understand your emotional needs with their intuition, love you just the right way, be the best version of themselves, do everything to make your life better. Perhaps, nobody talks about water natives' love because very few experience it and those who experience the mature water love are too busy in self actualizing and transformation. They are too detached from self promotion and fakery.

Life themes: yours and mine.

🌸For anyone who resonates

I was watching a youtube channel of a woman who posts her life. It reminded me of my teenage years and early 20s years when I was too naive and careless like her. I would make drawings, cards, record songs and really dedicate myself to people I cared for. I would not think consciously of what I was doing and just followed my heart. Somehow when I got at a low point in life, I felt like I was depressed and started living my childhood again. I would tell my childhood stories and venting as a joke but later i realized that it was no jokes it was serious trauma. Then began a long journey of internet research and contemplation on human psychology and mental illnesses. Obviously, now my perspective was changed. I started looking for underlying faces, ulterior motives, signs of manipulation and really take lies seriously.

But somewhere in my heart was a bitterness "why me?" If other women can do the same things as me but flourish, have smooth lives and socialize, then why was I bumping into detours and psychological pain? For eg, some woman can post picture of her award on social media and be proud of it. But if i do it, i would feel intense regret and shame "what if i am imposter?" "I am so entitled and narcissistic" "i am just lucky, my good karma will run out then I will face failures" "There are so many girls who worked harder than me but did not get award" and so on. A cycle of self destructive thoughts and not under my control either.

Later, I read that it was my unconscious telling me I was on the wrong path, one that was not determined for me. What we see in other people's life is not necessarily meant to work for us either. Other people do have softer life paths and imitating them will do you no good, if your life has been darker than average. Life is not black and white, some days are really nice, some memories are really nice but if you think that the downsides outweigh the upaides then it is time to rethink if you are making some mistakes, that is if you are walking the path not meant for you? Simple example, some person can do love marriage all fine, but you keep getting into heart breaks, does this mean you need to go by arranged marriage route? Or, some people can succeed in business all fine but you seem to make losses, does this mean you need to go by job route? Or, some people can eat carbohydrates all fine but you seem to get sick from too much carbs?

I make a list of all the things I did in past and whether they were mistake ❌ or correct ✅? If they worked out correct for me then that is meant for my life theme but if it was mistake for me then I would not do it again. One more thing is to use tarot to ask question and write down cards that come up then in future reflect if this decision was mistake ❌ or correct ✅ for you? Eliminate mistakes and repeat correct decisions. This strategy is same as told in many self help books.

Basically, individual life theme differs between people. You are not living the life I live, although we both are interested in astrology. It might take some practice to figure out life theme but I think it can help some people who are prone to chaotic decisions making.

Self development series: "I am so bad at judging people".

For 7th, 8th, 12th housers, scorpio, cancer, pisces risings and placements. Also for airy signs placements.

You were born, you had family friends neighbours, you watched TV movies, you find a boyfriend/girlfriend, graduate get a job get married, have kids and life goes on. But who are you? And how do you know who the people in your life are? How do you identify others, how do you judge who is who? There is something called "projection" that happens when two people meet, or even watch a celebrity on TV, or even read something in a letter or on a website. How would you know what I am like from my posts? You will project, assume, judge.

Projection is a psychic process, it happens automatically and spontaneously, it is not under our will power to control our projection. Just like you breath to survive, you have to project to live in the society. No, you cannot be a hermit for too long. You have to go out, work, date, marry, buy grocery - projection is a necessity.

Everybody is not the same. People are different from each other - some qualities are dominant in them and some are sleeping. You project your own dominant (good or bad) qualities on others. For example, if you have jealousy in you, you will easily spot it in others too.

It is especially for those who are more irrational and impulse driven. They would think that just because they are honest, somebody else is honest too because both are just the same, especially if that somebody says the right things like "yeah I want to connect deeply with you". How we judge others, react to them depends on our projections. But how exactly do I judge someone else? In archetypes. Archetypes are images, emotions, factors and motifs that arrange the psychic elements into certain images. Carl Jung observed in his practice that similar patterns repeated in every patient assisted by similar meanings - he called these patterns motifs and proposed that the archetypes are universal in nature, reside in the collective unconsious and are inherited by each generation. How a person reacts to a situation in 2023 is how a person reacted in 1723 - patterns are the same.

Archetypes are not singular but a combination of many elements. For example, have you watched any typical romance movie? You see a silly lover boy and a next door girl, falling in love, going through made up scenarios and end up together. These kind of characters are simplified and basic levels of archetype. Reality is 10× more complicated than fairytales.

So when a scorpio girl falls in "love" with the boy she met last week, she is actually projecting and seeing archetypes in him that may not be there. She falls for the inner image of the ideal boy, her own masculine part animus and is driven by her feelings. I see a handsome/rich/funny/intelligent/top college graduate boy? "He must be a good man, he must be what I think he is". Did he just say he loves me even though we met in a chatroom 2 days back? "Of course, I know this is love". I swear if water placements dont tell the funniest "love stories", I will eat my hat. Madam/sir, this is projection, not love. Though I would not advice against making mistakes. You learn from your mistakes. Make 100 mistakes but in the end you will learn to judge people's character the right way.

I read something interesting about projection so i will share. We are all energy. The way we project is believed to be godly or divine process. Projection happens from the background of the psyche, that is the autonomous inner inages that come and go on their own happen from the very bottom of our psyche. Therefore, those who are gifted in astrology are the ones who project very consciously. In fact, the most accurate astrologers are those who are the most watery/most in touch with their unconscious life. This is why 8th house is called the house of occult and also signifies the unconscious.

Joseph Campbell has said, "The psychotic drowns in the same waters in which the mystic swims with delight". An evolved native is a good judge of character because he/she knows his/her own inner life, corners of personality, sleeping qualities, spends a lot of time exploring their own inner world and self reflection. This is why water people make detective type because they can really read the energy, tone of voice, pattern of behaviour, body language, expressions and intentions of people. Though, do not be too caught up in assumptions - projection is after all a means to understand yourself, your own individuation and identity.

Intention matters

Have you ever met one of those people who pretend to be someone they are not inside? You might be surprised that so many people around us are actually actors. Intention means goal or purpose behind an action. For eg, someone dating a girl because he says "he loves her" but actually his intention is to use her for her money or use her for her beauty or to keep her for emotional work&security. Language is a powerful tool to connect with each other. We have a default tendency to trust someone with their words. If someone says "I am a doctor" you would trust they are because they said so. You might ask for their degree and cretificate for proof. This is a big example. Lets take a small example. If someone says to you "I care for you so much. You are my best friend". This is an abstract claim. What proof will you ask? Nothing. Only time will show if they actually meant what they said or else.

Apart from spiritual world, we also need material world for survival. Money, job, power, status are actually really important in life. You can pay for treatment of your loved ones. Education of your dear ones. Give them a comfortable lifestyle. Give money to social work and charity. Money is important in life. And it is obvious that not everyone will have an honest intention to make money in honest ways. Corruption is rampant.

In my observation, it is air signs that are most prone to saying something but intending something else. You might have to take their words with caution because lying comes easily to them. Air signs can mature of course. Remember, maturity does not come with age but self work. Maturity is hard work. It is not just aging.

The next question is whether their intention is malicious? Apart from psychopaths and sociopaths, others do care a bit about how others perceive them. I have read that psychopaths dont feel any guilt or shame. So these are the people who can lie and manipulate with evil intention.

On the other hand, most of the people think they are doing what is "right" to them. They will justify explain defend react how they acted righteously.

So, be very vigilant if you can when dealing with people. Life is hard and people can attempt deceptive ways to make their intentions meet the end.