Hyde: *bleeding Out*

Hyde: *bleeding out*

Eric: hyde, you’re bleeding, what’s your type?

Hyde: hot, brunette, loud, loves unicorns-

Eric: no man, you’re blood type

Hyde: red

a while ago i saw a tiktok about a woman who wore a white dress to her son's wedding because she hated her daughter-in-law. the sister-in-law, who also had a terrible relationship with her mother, got wine all over the dress and the woman had to go home and change.

pam burkhart is the kind of mother who would wear white to her own daughter's wedding and nobody can tell me otherwise.

and i think kitty would be the one to throw wine at her dress and kick her out of the ceremony.

but that's it. thank you for coming to my ted talk.

Jackie: I feel so bad for the people who just see me passing on the street and they're thinking like, "oh my God, she's so hot." but like, they don't know me.

Jackie: So they don't know that I'm also really funny.

Jackie: I think we should get a divorce.

Hyde: What are you doing?

Jackie: Just practicing.

Hyde, confused: Why are you planning our hypothetical divorce?

Jackie: I don't know, I'm 20. I think I'm having a... quarter life crisis.

Hyde: We aren't even married yet.

Jackie: Hypothetically divorce me.

Hyde: Okay, then I'm hypothetically taking half of your assets.

Jackie: Well, you didn't sign the hypothetical prenup... is it? It's called a prenup, right?

Eric: Yeah, it's a prenup, and you did hypothetically sign one so...

Jackie: What are you doing here?

Eric: I'm his hypothetical lawyer in this divorce case.

Jackie: Well, then I'm taking the hypothetical kids so– right? We can get those, right?

Donna: Yes, we can definitely get the hypothetical kids, don't worry about it.

Hyde: And what the fuck is this hypothetical nerd doing here?

Jackie: This is my hypothetical lawyer and we've been hypothetically sleeping with each other so...

Hyde: How could you hypothetically– How could you hypothetically do this to me?

Jackie: Because you hypothetically are an alcoholic, so.

thanks for the tag @zeppelin-and-unicorns and @scaponigifs 💖

coffee shop or flower shop | au or fix-it | enemies to lovers or childhood friends | angst or fluff | love at first sight or pining | modern au or historical au | soulmates or unrequited | fake dating or secret dating | break up & make up or proposal & weddings | get together or established relationship | oblivious pining or domestic fluff | hurt/comfort or crack | meet the parents or meet cute

Ooh games! I got tagged by @lastcallatrockysbar for This or That Fanfic Edition…

coffee shop or flower shop | au or fix-it | enemies to lovers or childhood friends | angst or fluff | love at first sight or pining | modern au or historical au | soulmates or unrequited | fake dating or secret dating | break up & make up or proposal & weddings | get together or established relationship | oblivious pining or domestic fluff | hurt/comfort or crack | meet the parents or meet cute

@fangirlxwritesx67 @stusbunker @waywardbaby

hello my honeys 😊

first of all, today is my birthday 🎊 i am really happy and i wanted to share this with you guys 🥰

second, i'm so sorry i'm not posting content constantly like i used to, i promise i'm working on it :)

and most importantly, i'd like to thank miss jackie burkhart for making me buy bell bottoms because... damn, i look so good!

love, mydearburkhart xx