One Mans Trash (my Fic At 2AM After Ive Reread It So Many Times Ive Become Sick Of And Disillusioned

One man’s trash (my fic at 2AM after I’ve reread it so many times I’ve become sick of and disillusioned by it) is another man’s treasure (my fic a few days later when I’m looking at it with fresh eyes and realizing it’s actually not that bad, perhaps even pretty good).

The futile task of ordering the chaos

ao3 fic dreamwidth

An index of oldfic:

A Worse Pill to Swallow: Part one Part two Part three

The Book of Moltres James: Part one Part two Part three Part four

Giovanni Is Just the Worst boss: Part one Part two

James and Meowth Do A Fluffy Experiment: Part one Part two

The Angsty Domestic Life of Team Rocket: Part one Part two Part three

Jessie Drugs James and Is Generally Abusive: Part one Part two Part three Part four

James's Special Delivery: Part one Part two Part three

Toxic Rocketshipping: Part one Part two Part three

Bad Blood: Part one Part two Part three

Holiday Half Arse: Part one Part two

You Got Played (A Yu-Gi-Oh songfic): Part one Part two Part three Part four Part five

The Invasion (A Sims 2 Darkfic): Part one Part two Part three

(IN PROGRESS) The Sad Saga of James Morgan and Company: Episode one Episode two Episode three Episode four Episode five

Brotherly Love (A Taboo Animaniacs fic): Part one Part two Part three Part Four Part Five

New fic and miscellany:

Level Nineteen and Pregnant: A Short Crackfic

The Charm Cat and His Queen: Erotic Blueshipping Haiku

Blueship Ahoy: A Collection of James/Meowth Smut Short Stories

Leaky Loki: A Sims 2 kinkfic (direct link to ao3)

Your Narf is My Drug: A Pinky and the Brain/Animaniacs parody songfic (mirror on ao3)

(IN PROGRESS) The Prophet of Moltres: An Illustrated Crackfic: Page one

(IN PROGRESS) Team Rocket But They're Sims: Part one Part two Part three Part four

a quick sketch of a ship kitten

Toxic Rocketshipping: But What Are James's Thoughts On Yaoi? (part two of three)

It might seem like the fic has calmed down, but it's just trying to lull you into a false sense of security.

Part one is here.

Content Warning: First-person mixed points-of-view; gross misunderstanding of slavery; possibly uncomfortable discussions of romance; Pokémon/Human romantic relationship; found family to lovers firebomb; Jessie freckle-shames James; silly, middle-school romance writing; out-of-character behavior for James and Meowth; absolute character assassination of Jessie; Jesus Hades Christ twelve!me tortured James a lot in fic (so much James whumpage)

-O-o-O-o-O-

(Meowth's point of view)

James was in the sun, working on our plan.

It didn't work.

James gets freckles when he stays in the sun for a long time. I thought it was cute, but Jessie didn't.

"Get rid of those hideous spots," she said.

"I can't," James said.

"Then you'll just have to be uglier than usual." Jessie sounded like she didn't care about James's feelings.

James just stared at her. Then he ran into our room and closed the door.

"What's his problem?" Jessie said.

"His problem?! What's your problem? Why are you trying to hurt James like this? He never did anything to you. He cared for you all the time. You never even said 'thank you' once to him," I said.

"Thank him? That little bitch? I'd rather marry that twerp. At least he's not as ugly as James," Jessie said.

"I don't believe you," I yelled.

I went into our room. James was lying down. His hair was messy, his eyes were swollen from crying, and he had dark circles under his eyes. Tears ran down his face, over his freckles.

"What's wrong, James?" I knew he could be upset because of what Jessie said, but there might be a deep-seated reason for all this crying.

"I heard the whole conversation. Jessie hates me." James's voice shook as he spoke.

I didn't want to tell him the truth. But lying only makes things worse. So I just didn't say anything.

"I knew it," he said.

"I just don't know what's with Jessie. First, she buys you, now she abuses you," I said. "I don't know what to do to comfort or protect you."

"It's okay," James said.

We sat in an awkward silence for a long while.

Then James asked the question.

"Would you mind if I liked Pokémon?"

"You mean, 'like them' like them?"

"Yes. It's called Pokébestial."

"No. I wouldn't mind. Actually, I think I'd like you—I mean, like it, too."

Why?

"Okay," James said.

Like you? Why did I say that? I wasn't ready for James to know that. The only way he didn't hear that is if he couldn't think clearly.

Wait a minute—I just kinda mumbled it. That meant it was likely he didn't hear it.

Good, I thought.

-O-o-O-

(James's point of view)

I was out of love with Jessie, but I think my orientation got a little "off."

I think I'm Pokébestial.

The closer I got to Meowth, the more I liked him. At first, he was like an older brother, then he was like a twin brother, then we were like good friends, as in playmates. Then we started becoming like best friends.

Suddenly, I had a crush on Meowth.

What if he had a crush on me?! We'd be boyfriend and—

Hold up. Wait a minute. This'll have some yaoi in it.

That just didn't seem right, but I couldn't do what Jessie or anyone else would think is right. I had to tell Meowth.

But what would Meowth think? What if he was like everyone else? What if he didn't like it?

I was in for a real surprise.

-O-o-O-

Later that afternoon, we were sitting in our room, all alone.

Just us boys. No Jessie. She wouldn't want me until nighttime.

"James? I need to talk to you," Meowth said.

"Okay," I said. But I noticed something about his voice. It was soft, almost shy-sounding. He was also blushing a little, I could see it through his fur.

"Did you hear what I said about you being Pokébestial?" he asked.

"No. What did you say?" I asked. I started to get just a bit suspicious.

"I said that….I'd like it," Meowth said.

"Why?" I asked. I kind of knew why, but I just couldn't think clearly because of what it was.

"I like you."

"Like me, like me?"

"Yes."

Right then. I just found out my crush likes me too. What did I do? I did the only thing that was in my character to do.

I passed out.

-O-o-O-o-O-

Moral of the story: Being Pokébestial is probably better than being a sex slave for your coworker, though neither is recommended.

The Prophet of Moltres or: What if James thought Moltres was Azor Ahai?

The Sad Saga of James Morgan and Company: I Still Have Questions

If you were (or still are) a regular viewer of Xena: Warrior Princess, you will probably recognize the inspiration for this fic as the season three episode "Forget Me Not." You will also notice that eleven!me completely mangled it.

This fic contains: Colorful language; possible out-of-character moments for James and Meowth; convoluted occult lore; murderous, occult-powered Jessiebelle; ellipses abuse; definite out-of-character moment for Ash; original character; attempted suicide on astral plane/alternate timeline; violence; Jessiebelle is really messed up; Butch and Cassidy are pretty terrible, too; Jessie is still dead; James actually has useful powers (?!); Jesus Hades Christ eleven!me tortured James (and Meowth!) a lot in fic (this particular warning is getting a lot of use isn't it)

-O-o-O-o-O-

*James and Meowth are still mourning Jessie. Jessiebelle is still after James. One day, James and Meowth are walking in the forest when they come across a strange building. It has a sign that says, "Answer Shack: Any questions will be answered, whether you like it or not." It looks like a stone temple.

Meowth: Do you have any questions? James: (thinks awhile). Yes. Several.

*James goes in, but the two guards don't let Meowth in.

Meowth: Hey, what's the big idea? Guard One: Only one inquirer is allowed at a time. Meowth: I don't have any questions. I just wanted to go in with my friend. Guard Two: The questions must be asked and answered in private.

*In the temple, James is standing and looking around. A boy who looks an awful lot like Tylas is standing across from him. James is looking at him with a frightened look on his face.

Temple Keeper Tylas look-alike: What is wrong, James? James: (whispering) Nothing.

*The boy even sounds like Tylas, except his voice is monotone. He's also a witch.

Temple Witch: What do you wish to know? James: Why did all the things that happened to me have to happen to me? Temple Witch: I know what you are talking about. I have been watching you. I have seen you witness the death of your chosen sister and best friend as well as the death of your true love. I have seen you go through pain only a power-carrier can survive. I know the answer to all your questions. It all had to happen to you because you are the Chosen One. If all of that had not happened to you, history would have been changed. And because you are a good bad guy, meaning that on the outside you are a bad guy, but on the inside, you cannot stand being bad. You will kill yourself if you steal one more Pokémon. You will want your Meowth friend to scratch your heart out if your plan to steal Ash's Pikachu actually works. James: No…. Temple Witch: Yes. It may be painful, but it is the truth. You cannot deny it. James: No. I like being part of Team Rocket. I like being evil and nasty. Temple Witch: Admit it. You are not fit to be a bad guy and you know it.

*James tries to break away from him, but for every step backward he takes, the Temple Witch takes a step forward. Even if the Temple Witch weren't taller than him, he'd be afraid.

Temple Witch: You are the perfect one for my experiment.

*Meanwhile, outside….

Meowth: Let me in, NOW!

*Meowth hears James scream. The guards let him in. Meowth sees James lying unconscious on the floor. The Temple Witch stands over him.

Meowth: (screams) What have you done to him?! Temple Witch: I dosed him with this. (holds up a sack of powder) I will take you into what he is thinking and experiencing now.

*The Temple Witch takes Meowth into a back room to show him what James is experiencing in the astral plane dimension. It's mostly what would happen if James had never met Jessie and Meowth.

Meowth: You forced him to think these awful thoughts? Temple Witch: It was necessary. (points to a lonely-looking Pokémon) Look over there. Does that cat look familiar? Meowth: Is that….? Temple Witch: Yes. That is you.

*The cat he pointed to could talk, but….

Temple Witch: What is wrong with this picture? Meowth: I don't know. All I see is a cat talking. Temple Witch: He is talking to himself. This is where you would be if you had never met James, just after Jessie died. All alone.

*Some people take him away.

Temple Witch: Listen. Person taking Meowth away: Where is your owner? Can you really talk and understand us? Meowth in James's dream: She died. Person: We'll have to set up an orphanage. Dream Meowth: An orphanage?! Please don't take me there! Person: I'm sorry, but we can't let you stay on the streets if you used to have a trainer. (takes him away) Temple Witch: That is what would have happened. Now, look at this.

*They're at a mansion, looking through the window.

Meowth: That's James! I don't see anything different about him. Temple Witch: Look closely. At his expression. Look what that woman is doing to him. Meowth: That's Jessiebelle! But she's got a whip and a wand. James looks so scared and sad. Temple Witch: He is not just scared and sad. He is frightened and miserable. Now, watch.

*Jessiebelle closes the door and locks it. James sits, shaking. He's crying. Jessiebelle hits him.

Meowth: Don't let her do this to you! Temple Witch: He cannot hear or see you. Meowth: I don't want to see any more of this. Temple Witch: We are not finished. Look.

*James is in the dungeon. He's doing something with a rope.

Meowth: What's he doing? Temple Witch: He had to tie the knot. Now he will tie the noose. Meowth: What's that supposed to mean?! Temple Witch: He is committing suicide.

*Jessiebelle comes in. She makes James put the noose away. He's now like a slave. He can't talk without permission.

Meowth: She's hurt him so much. Temple Witch: He is not allowed to cry. One tear could mean death for him. Meowth: (crying) Stop! Take me back to reality. I want to see the real James. Not some emotionless, voiceless boy who happens to be the same person. Temple Witch: It is now time to return.

*They go back to reality. James wakes up.

Temple Witch: What both of you just saw and experienced was a page from your life's history ripped out. The page where you met each other. (disappears into a cloud of smoke)

*James picks up Meowth and runs as fast as he can trying to get as far as he can from that temple. Later that day….

Meowth: Why are you sitting on that rock? James: (flat, monotone voice) I'm thinking. (wanders back to the tent)

*James's face is pale and his eyes are glazed over. Meowth could swear on Jessie's grave that an eerie green glow is coming from James's green eyes. Meowth follows him into the tent.

Meowth: If there's something wrong, please talk to me.

*James glances at Meowth, even though he isn't really looking at Meowth.

James: (flat voice) It's just that boy. He looks too much like Tylas. Meowth: (thinking) I wish I had the old James back. Not….this distant boy who looks at everyone with an empty stare and wanders around like a ghost. I want my only living friend back.

*Meowth starts to cry.

James: (flat voice) What's wrong? (turns to face Meowth)

*James's empty stare and the lack of color on his face only makes Meowth cry harder.

Meowth: I'm worried about you. James: (flat voice) Why ever would that be? I'm fine. Meowth: No, you're not. You talk like a robot. You wander around like a ghost. You have that distant look in your eyes. You're almost as white as your uniform. James: (soft, flat voice) I've always been like this. Meowth: (crying) No, you haven't! I just want the old James back. The one who even though he could only smile weakly, he'd smile anyway.

*James is quiet for a minute. Meowth thinks he sees a very small trace of emotion on James's face. When James turns to face him fully, he has that emotionless expression and empty stare back on.

James: (flat voice) There's nothing wrong with me. (sighs) Meowth: Even your sighing sounds monotone. James: (flat voice) Maybe after a good night's rest, we'll both feel better.

*They go to sleep. The next day, James wanders off to that rock he sat on the day before. The twerps notice him.

Ash: It's Team rocket! What are you up to now?

*James doesn't answer him.

Ash: What's the deal with him?

*James turns in Ash's direction. He has that distant look in his eyes.

Ash: He's giving me he creeps. Brock: He looks strange. Like a ghost, except he's not floating or see-through.

*Misty walks up to James.

Misty: What's wrong? James: (flat voice) Nothing. Meowth: He's been like that for hours.

*Misty waves her hand in front of James's face. He doesn't seem to respond.

Misty: He's so pale and quiet. Why is that? Meowth: I don't know. James: (flat voice) It's something I saw yesterday. Misty: What was it?

*James tells her in a flat monotone voice. His eyes are halfway open, like he's in a trance. After hearing the story, the twerps are disturbed and leave. James is trying to support himself by leaning on a nearby tree.

Meowth: I think he's draining your energy. James: (flat voice, getting shakier) I'm fine. Maybe my powers are just going insane again.

*James shakes violently, breaks away from the tree, and runs to a bush to throw up.

Meowth: You sure don't seem fine to me.

*James looks up again while wiping his mouth. He seems to have rejected whatever powder he took in the temple. The distant James dissolves. James breaks down in tears.

James: (crying) That temple witch was Tylas's ghost, being controlled by Jessiebelle.

*Meowth comforts James and then walks him back to the tent to rest. Later that evening, Meowth decides to cook dinner.

Meowth: We're having soup. It'll go down easier for you. (hands James a bowl) James: Thanks.

*The next day, as they're walking through the woods, they come across Butch and Cassidy.

Cassidy: I don't see Jessie anywhere. I guess she couldn't cut it in Team Rocket after all.

*James and Meowth glare.

Butch: You two should go ahead and quit while you're behind. You're not fit to be Team Rocket members. Cassidy: Are you still shitty at training that Victreebel? Did it finally snap and eat Jessie's hair off? Is that why she left you? Butch: Or did all your failures drive her to make a final blast off?

*James's hands curl into fists.

James: JESSIE WAS MURDERED, YOU UTTER CUNTS!

*James zaps lightning at Butch and Cassidy. They scream and run off. James sinks to his knees and stares at his hands.

Meowth: Ha! You sure showed them! (turns to James) James? James: I could've killed them…. Meowth: But you didn't. James: That doesn't matter! (trembling) Meowth: I think you should lie down. James: Let's just set up camp.

*They set up camp. James goes into the tent and lies down on his sleeping bag. Meowth follows.

Meowth: I'm worried about you. First, Jessiebelle tries to kill you, then she kills Jessie, now this. I hate to say this, but maybe we can't fight her anymore. James: What are you saying?! Meowth: Maybe we should surrender. James: No! I'm not going down without a fight. It's even in our motto! "Surrender now or prepare to fight!" I have to live up to it. Even if we lose. (sighs sadly) Jessie would want us to. Meowth: I miss Jessie, too. And we're not even near her grave. James: It's not just Jessie I miss. That temple witch reminded me of Tylas. Meowth: I see a pattern here. You loved Tylas, so Jessiebelle killed him. Jessie is our friend, so Jessiebelle killed her, and….

*James's eyes widen.

James: You're the only one left. (starts crying quietly) Meowth: I won't die. And I won't leave you. James: I will protect you.

*James protects Meowth and they manage to avoid Jessiebelle for a while.

-O-o-O-o-O-

Moral of the story: If a person, place, or organization claims to have all the answers, RUN.