I Posted This Last Year, & As Another TDoV Has Come I Figured I Would Share A Bit Of Progress On My Personal

I posted this last year, & as another TDoV has come I figured I would share a bit of progress on my personal journey & some thoughts on the state of things for trans rights in my country.

As of this month, I've been on testosterone for a year & a quarter, & while I have experienced some changes I was looking forward to, I am still misgendered daily. I will probably never pass as a transmasculine person, but I'm doing my best to come to terms with that.

A fully positive experience was finally having top surgery at the beginning of February. My healing for that has gone pretty well overall, & the euphoria I get from having a flat chest has been so incredibly validating that I can't adequately put it into words.

That said, I have experienced transphobia going out in public, from occasional customer service workers & other customers in stores, & even from medical professionals during a recent health scare (I am recovering, no worries there).

My home state has a bill on the docket that would ban HRT for minors & prevent anyone from having their birth certificate amended after they are a year old. I have not yet begun the process of changing my gender markers on any of my legal documents, so this would directly affect two of my transition goals.

Similar bills have already passed in several states in the US, & many more are being introduced & discussed in others. The attacks on the civil rights of transgender people in the US are relentless right now, & the fearmongering & moral panic regarding trans people is at an all time high.

We need our cis & het allies now more than ever because we cannot protect our rights on our own. Our voices, though loud, are often drowned out by the opposition, & even those not directly opposed to trans rights aren't taking the situation here as seriously as they should.

Trans people are people, the same as anyone else, & all we want is to live our lives as ourselves & be afforded the same rights & dignity that cis people are afforded without question. As a visibly trans person living in the Bible Belt of the southern US, I am afraid that my very personhood may be stripped away from me soon.

It isn't a nice way to live, & moving somewhere safer isn't an immediate possibility for me. It's not feasible at all for many people. These transphobic bills & laws need to be met with strong opposition, & we need to fight just as hard to have protections for trans civil rights coded into law.

I am doing what I can, & I implore you all to do the same, be you cis or trans. We're all in this together, & we need each other now more than ever. Compassion & hope are what I wish for all my trans siblings on this day, & may our next TDoV find the world a more accepting place.

Happy International Transgender Day of Visibility from your friendly neighborhood nonbinary owl!

This makes.. so much sense in retrospect. I'm relieved & pissed off at the same time. So much of my negative self image as a child & onward can be tied back to things that I now know are related to my ADHD, & I'm just.. thrown. Things may or many not have been different if I'd known sooner, but I'd have an answer for so much that bothered me or made me feel inadequate. That would've been something.

UH WHAT

UH...... WHAT.........

Draco Falls First Fic Recs

I made this rec list when someone in a server asked for fics in which Draco falls in love with Harry first. I love pining, & this scenario is the perfect setup for it. As a result, I had rather a lot to choose from, but here are ten that made the cut this time.

The Unbearable Burden of Caring & it's sequel Sins and Scars and Shattered Things by Tessa Crowley (E, 22,189)

Thoughts: These fics both ruined me. They were so damn good that I could have wept from the sheer beauty of the prose alone. I swear I must've spent half of them clutching a tissue in anticipation of breaking into ugly sobs every five minutes. They were romantic & beautifully poignant; even the smut was so emotionally charged that I was left spellbound. I highly, highly recommend them both.

you've got the antidote for me by Kandakicksass (E, 20,730)

Thoughts: My heart was breaking for Draco before I even got through the summary. This soulmate fic is recced a lot & with good reason. It's still one of my favorites, & I reread it quite often.

Dragon Heartstrings by JET_Playin (E, 23,825)

Thoughts: Admittedly I'm a sucker for soulmate fics, so here's another for you. I liked how the author covered Draco's experience with seeing the red strings that indicated soulmate bonds throughout the years, briefly touching on his early childhood & skipping through his years at Hogwarts before settling into the meat of the story during his & Harry's eighth year at school. This is another one that I've reread several times because I just enjoy it so much each time.

Beating Out of Time by Moss_Man_Writes (E, 73,574)

Thoughts: I was sucked in from the very beginning, & I loved Draco's POV the most. The pining on Draco's part was perfect, & watching Harry fall in love with him was just enchanting.

The Butterfly Kiss by triggerlil (T, 1,998)

Thoughts: This is the shortest of all my recs, but it's by no means less engaging. The ethereal atmosphere of the whole thing left me breathless. Draco as a butterfly was something I'd never seen before, & even though I knew fairies were sometimes viewed as butterflies by unsuspecting mortals, I never would've thought of it as a premise. It was such a gorgeous soulmate AU (couldn't help myself). Draco's pining for Harry throughout was heart-achingly beautiful, too.

The Shape of the World by bixgirl1 (E, 48,276)

Thoughts: Memory loss fics often guarantee a healthy dose of angst, & this is no exception. Harry being the one afflicted did provide the perfect setup for Draco to fall for him first, though. He was probably already a bit in love with him before he ran back into him, to be honest, haha. This is by my favorite Drarry author, & rarely is there ever a time one of her fics doesn't make it onto a rec list of mine.

The Light More Beautiful by firethesound (E, 81,255)

Thoughts: Draco was so clever & creative in this, & the way he felt about Harry took my breath away. He appreciated the exact things about him that make me love Harry so much as a character, & it was probably my favorite thing about this fic. The pining was achingly lovely, the banter & teasing were fun, & the smut was scorching hot. firethesound is one of the most popular Drarry authors to date, & this is probably my favorite fic of hers.

The Lily Spell by pickledghost (E, 86,512)

Thoughts: Okay, fair warning, this is an Omegaverse fic & the author is up front about the fact that Draco's characterization isn't standard to canon or even most of fanon. He was so sweet that I just couldn't get enough of him. It's also an AU in which there was no second war with Voldemort, & I think it had a very believable interpretation of how Harry might've turned out under those circumstances. He was still very much himself at his core, just more confident & self-assured, in my opinion. The slow burn was so well done that I didn't even notice the passage of time while I was glued to the story. It hooked me in & kept me invested from start to finish.

Pop Up Pals by bambimoss (E, 62,447)

Thoughts: I cannot believe I almost forgot to add this fic. I read it twice in a row. That's how much I enjoyed the story. Draco being so lonely broke my fucking heart. Seriously, I think someone would have to be a sociopath if they couldn't empathize with Draco's experiences here. Surprisingly, I laughed a lot at this, & I also cried like a baby at one point. The characterizations were amazing, & the fic was jam-packed with emotion. It was absolutely stunning, & nothing has managed to knock it off of my top ten favorite Drarry fics list despite some very close contenders since the first time I read it.

Go wild!

Reblog if I can spam you with boops

AO3 Top Relationships Bracket - THIRD PLACE

This poll is a celebration of fandom history; we're aware that there are certain issues with many of the listed pairings and sources, but they are a part of that history. Please do not take this as an endorsement, and refrain from harassment.

Could you elaborate on what you meant by "[Draco] appreciated the exact things about him that make me love Harry so much as a character" in your rec for The Light More Beautiful? That got me really curious, but I already have so many fics to read atm 😭

I'm so sorry that I didn't answer this sooner, but I'm very scatterbrained, nevermind all the upheaval in my life this year, haha. Anyway, to give you a full explanation would require quoting part of the fic like I did in my comment on it, but I don't want to spoil anything for you. So I'll do my best with just the general idea.

The Harry in The Light More Beautiful is very protective of the people he loves. He's funny, clever, & tantalizingly powerful. But the thing I love most about him, that the Draco in the fic agrees with me on, is that despite Harry's horrible childhood, the mad years with Voldemort trying to kill him at school, the war, & all the death & sadness he's seen, Harry can still deeply appreciate the simplest things. Like his favorite song coming on the radio, the first bite of a crisp apple, making a friend laugh, or savoring the warmth of a fire during winter.

This is illustrated by a moment in which Harry is savoring something simple like that & Draco is watching him & appreciating that quality in him, thinking about what a marvel Harry is to him. I loved it because I was like, "Yes, that! Someone else sees it & understands & feels the same way I do." Connecting with a character & a moment like that makes a story particularly special, & it's stuck with me even years later. I really do highly recommend it if you haven't gotten to it yet. I hope you read it & that you enjoy it just as much as I did.