Would You Kill Him In His Bed?Thrust A Dagger Through His Head?I Would Not, Could Not, Kill The King.I

Would you kill him in his bed? Thrust a dagger through his head? I would not, could not, kill the King. I could not do that evil thing.  I would not wed this girl, you see. Now get her to a nunnery.

~ Green Eggs and Hamlet 

Funny story time: My mom, a veterinarian, was once in a taxi with a friend chatting about a dream she had about a snake. The cabbie made a less-than-tasteful remark about how "you know what a snake in a dream really means", to which she responded "actually, this snake was a patient of mine. Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar."

if a plant is sad do other plants photosympathize with it?

Readers, Friends and close-kept foes, Lady Excelsior and I will be offering the complete contents of our emporium available at a reduced price for the holidays! The forthcoming week (starting tomorrow at 9 a.m.) our entire inventory is 25 percent off with no additional shipping on multiple items; simply use the passcode ‘Narwhal’ to redeem the special discount. Hooray for Snow! 

An Engineer’s Guide to Cats 2.0 - The Sequel

Funny, Funny …

We constantly eat chemicals. We drink chemicals. We breathe chemicals. We are FULL of chemicals. We are literally MADE OF CHEMICALS. People who accuse things of being “full of chemicals” confuse the hell out of me. Of course they’re made out of chemicals What did you expect? Radio waves? Light? Anti-matter?

Here are some sources on the subject. Though no two of them seem to agree 100%, most of the data looks fairly similar, which is significant, considering they were likely using different types of bananas(I also am unfamiliar with most of these sources, and therefore cannot vouch for their credibility, but they appear to be legitimate): http://www.scopemed.org/?mno=15069 http://www.researchgate.net/publication/233758534_Article_6/file/9fcfd50b4875a31318.pdf http://bicol.da.gov.ph/Opportunities/banana%20profile/topic1.html http://nutritiondata.self.com/facts/fruits-and-fruit-juices/1846/2

so much for the “if you can’t pronounce the ingredients you shouldn’t eat it” thing am i right?