Bad Pun - Tumblr Posts
A guy walks into a sandwich shop and sees a sign that reads, “Home of the Meanest Grilled Cheese in Town.” So he orders the grilled cheese. When his bill arrives the waitress asks him how he liked the sandwich.
"Eh, it was about average."
The rare, medium, and well-done marshmowls
I still haven’t decided which form of pun delivery I prefer
said with a shitty grin, followed by a “aaaaaaahhhhhhh?“ that increases in volume and pitch (finger pistols optional but recommended)
said in absolute deadpan with no change in facial expression and no follow-up at all
said online where nobody can tell what you’re doing as you write it
UPS worldwide expedited with tracking
A Red Eared SLIDER. Guys! …guys? #prayforme #lordofpuns #comeatme
Originally posted by backwardsiris
All these video games with their epic orchestral musical scores. Those concerned moms are right: there’s way too much violins in video games.
Fuck the idea that you can’t engage in sex acts with abstract concepts.
i’m emotionally constipated.
i haven’t given a shit in days.
An imperial roman, brought into the modern world, fell ill and was given an IV. He asked “What is that for?”
Two things.
1: I crack eggs on the edge of whatever I’m mixing the eggs in.
2: I have a funny story about cracking eggs. So I was laying on the couch, with my legs over the arm when my older brother comes over holding an egg. He starts eggsplaining how you can’t crack an egg by squeezing it and demonstrates.
Only. He doesn’t do it right. The egg POPS. All over the couch. All over my leg. And all over his face. I lost it. I could not stop laughing. It was glorious. The timing was amazing, and I will never forget it.
can u guys rb this n add how you crack your eggs in the tags? i thought cracking them in the sinks’s edge is universal until i saw my friend cracking an egg on the counter instead and it was so pervese and diabolical
