Wishful Thinking- Adam Stanheight/Reader

Wishful Thinking- Adam Stanheight/Reader

A/N, okay like a warning. I write on my computer so this is gonna be a long one. IDK if that's what tumblr's for but... this is for anyone who wants it.

You hadn't slept in days. It had been rough with the loss of someone so close to you and you often had to think back to a time when life wasn't so hard. It was difficult, seeing as you had lost two precious people right after the other. The thing was, you couldn't seem to remember who it was you had lost. Could it have been your mother? Could it have been your father? Or was it a distant relative? A second cousin? A third cousin? Maybe an aunt or an uncle? In any case, the fact still remained, you couldn't recall who had passed away. It was almost like, you chose not to remember.

But why would someone like you want to forget the people who had passed? Wouldn't they be special to you? Didn't you have a relationship of some kind with the deceased? It shouldn't be so blurry. This was... nonsense! You weren't that heartless of a person. At least, you hoped you weren't... And you certainly didn't srive to be. But it didn't matter anymore. You were home, a pie was baking in the oven, and your significant other was working in his darkroom.

You had moved in with your boyfriend six months ago. He was nice, but... he had anxiety issues. Not like it was easy to recover from one of Jigsaw's games, but... it was a work in progress. His therapist said he was doing well. You sat down on the couch, the smell of cigarette smoke filled your nose. It was a relaxing scent; it made you think of HIM: Adam Faulkner Stanheight.

Speaking of which, out of nowhere Adam appeared around the corner. He was setting up some pictures in his darkroom. It was nearly eleven thirty, but you didn't mind, you liked staying up with Adam. Although, he had kept you out of the room this time, claiming that he was going to surprise you with this new set of photos. You were suspicious. Not that you didn't trust Adam, but... mostly, you were concerned about what embarrassing pictures Adam had taken of you behind your back. You weren't looking forward to finding out.

You gestured to the spot next to you all the same. It would take some time for the pictures to develop anyway, and Adam wasn't about to ruin the surprise. He had a grim look on his face. It worried you. "Is everything okay?"

Adam sat down next to you, and stared at the coffee table dully. His eyes were dark, and unseeing. After a long couple minutes, in which you started to wring your hands, he spoke at last. His words were slow and thoughtful, and his voice was hollow, but you could detect some kind of worry in it. "I just realized one day, you're gonna be gone. Then what will I do? Once you leave me and never come back, I don't think I'll be the same again."

You looked at Adam in alarm. What did he think was going to happen to you? You were completely fine and well. "Adam," you said soothingly, patting him on the shoulder. "Why are you worrying about that right now? I'm not going anywhere for a long time. I promise." You turned his head towards you, and he looked at you desolately. You leaned over and kissed him on the lips. You hadn't been expecting such a vehement reaction from Adam. Apparently he was eager to continue.

He lifted you from the couch and put you on his lap, never once removing his lips from yours. You started to smile at his affection, but Adam gave you no breathing time; he wanted more of you. So, you obliged.

Pushing him up against the couch, you kissed him harder, deeper, fiercer. You felt Adam sink into the couch willingly, tilting his head upwards in order to give you a better angle. You combed your fingers through his hair, tempting him to relax entirely.

There was no rush.

Everything was going to be fine.

You were right here.

Adam had his hands up your shirt in a matter of seconds, traveling up and down your body. You leaned into him, feeling him speed up the kiss. Your heartbeat was hammering, your cheeks were burning, and your head felt light. You loved the way Adam made you feel. But before anything could start, you pulled away. "I love you," you whispered.

"I love you more," Adam said softly and you chuckled.

"Undoubtedly," you agreed.

The oven blared loudly from behind you, and you stood up. "Hang on, baby. I don't want to burn the apartment down. Besides don't you want to try the blackberry pie?"

Adam gazed at the oven distantly. Fear flashed across his face, but it was gone so quickly you had a hard time believing what you saw. "Are you okay if I leave to go get the pie?"

The oven beeped again.

Adam didn't look at her. He leaned forward. "Don't go," he whispered to himself over and over. "Don't go, don't go, don't go..."

"I'm just getting out the pie, Adam. Where do you think I'm gonna go?"

Adam looked at her, a realization seemed to have sunk in. He seemed calm now, but dispirited. "Y-Yeah," he stammered slowly. "I guess I can't keep you here forever. I... hate this part... I wish... Oh, never mind I'm not gonna say that. You'll see for yourself any moment now."

Adam's words disconcerted you to an exceedingly far amount. You threw him a fearful glance. "Uh, what?"

"No, don't worry about it." Adam smiled. "Come on, I'll go with you." He brushed past you hastily, and began to open the oven.

Hesitantly, you turned around and stared after him. He was setting the pie on the stove now, allowing it to cool, but something didn't seem right. You now had less motivation to walk over and help him. You wouldn't have, if it wasn't for the smile he shot you. Surely, Adam was just being anxious. You approached him, your feet feeling heavy like stones.

As you neared the kitchen you could see the look in Adam's eyes. There was sadness, and a little bit of reluctance, but he didn't stop you from going. Finally, as your feet reached the tile of the kitchen floor, there was a wave of blurriness and you collapsed onto the ground.

You awoke with a raging headache, wet eyes, and a dry throat. You coughed a couple times and then raised your head. You found yourself in a busy bar. The lights were blinding you in streaks and the music blasted your eardrums. You gazed around dazedly, shuddering at the ache in your neck. It had formed from sleeping over the counter for so long. There was a glass of something next to you. It appeared to contain some alcoholic beverage, but you couldn't remember what it was you ordered.

You felt alone suddenly. Coldness seeped into your body, as the harsh reality sunk in. You turned around, not wanting to believe it, and called for Adam, but you were alone. Utterly and miserably alone. And then you remembered.

It came back in a flash so overwhelming you nearly fell off the bar stool. Your boyfriend hadn't survived Jigsaw's game. Your heart was ripped in half as you realized this. You almost couldn't move, and you burst into tears. You had been dating him for a year and a half, your lives had been going smoothly, and then John Kramer took him from you. You screamed and ignored the people who looked at you, that wasn't really something you were concerned about right now.

Halfheartedly, you began to trudge over to the door. You needed to get home, and clean up. There was something you hadn't done yet. You had been too scared to do it at first, but now you felt brave enough. Though your dream had mostly been wishful thinking, there was something true behind it. The darkroom had been left unattended for a while now, and Adam had been working on something for you on the day he had died. It seemed that your dream had given you a revelation.

Through a haze, you drove back to Adam's apartment. After his death, you didn't move out. You wanted to stay in the apartment because it was the last thing you had of him. That and the rest of his belongings. You couldn't leave this place, the thought gave you extreme anxiety. You bundled yourself into the apartment, and looked around the room.

Instantly, you had flashbacks to your dream. You glanced at the couch, and your heart felt heavy. You could feel Adam's hands on your body, and feel his lips on your mouth. The smoke had long ago been filtered out, but you could still smell and taste the dry flavor. You swallowed, and looked back in the kitchen. There was no pie baking there now, it hurt you too much to acknowledge this.

You lightly crossed the wooden floor and glided over to the darkroom. It had been three months since you had gone in there.

Three months since you had talked to Adam.

Three months since you had been WITH Adam.

Three months since the DEATH of Adam.

You gasped as you put your hand on the cold and dusty doorknob. The door creaked sorrowfully, as it pitifully gave in to your demands. It was dark inside, which was ironic, seeing as the purpose of the room was to be lit up. And the name made it funny, it was a 'darkroom' after all.

Unenthusiastically, you stepped inside. Your hand trailed the wall, like it had done many times before, and flicked on the red lights above. They came on with a light buzz, they were older than you had expected them to be. Had Adam even changed them while he was still alive? You let your eyes fall upon the photos that were all strung up in a row. They had developed nicely, it seemed.

You plucked one off the line and held it up to the light. It was a picture of you, in all your glory. You were in your best outfit, sitting in a patch of sunlight on the couch. The setting sun captured your face and darkened everything else, highlighting only your face. The rest was in dim shadow, so you could still see it but nothing was drawing attention to it.

The other pictures were similar but not the same. The majority was of you, but there were still a good number that were of you and him together. They were taking from interesting angles, with different lighting. Sometimes he was posing and other times you were posing. You couldn't help biting your quivering lip. This was all too much! Why hadn't Adam been here to see your reaction? Why hadn't he given them to you from the beginning? Why hadn't you looked at these before now? Why, why, why, why?

Sadness tugged at your heart and you sat down on your knees, clutching the photographs to your chest. You wouldn't be giving these up. They were too precious for you. You couldn't think properly; your mind felt like it had lost all of its abilities. The only thing you knew how to do was cry. You missed him. You missed him so much. The world was lifeless and hopeless, nothing would ever be the same. All you wished was to be back in that moment within your dream, outside was too gruesome. But alas you could not go back to then, and you were trapped in this miserable hellhole. You wondered why your life was so unfortunate. What had you done to deserve this?

In your fit of sobs and whimpers, you lost yourself to the grief. A long time passed after that, and you spent it all on the floor, but as the light peaked over the horizon and spilled through the living room window, your crying was put to a stop, and you yourself were dragged down by something stronger, and certainly much more necessary; slumber held you close and refused to let you go but something more was there, hidden under the photos that were pressed firmly to your bosom. There was something familiar about the warmth though, almost like it was Adam's loving embrace. It wreathed around you, and in the darkness it soothed you into a fitful burrow of sleep from which you did not know if you would even awaken.

Happily Ever After - Adam Stanheight X Reader

It was your favorite month. The temperature was perfect, and the trees were beautiful. The sky was exactly the way you wanted, as you marched down the sidewalk. Your favorite shoes skidded across the pavement gently, barely making a sound. You stumbled along, a cool wind blowing at your clothes.

You had left your apartment not long ago to find Adam Stanheight, your boyfriend. He lived across the block from you. Your apartment was in much better shape than his, but considering his current circumstances, the reasons were valid.

Tripping a little bit over your own feet, you came to Adam’s apartment. He had given you a spare key a while back, so you could easily get inside. The only things that disconcerted you were the other people already in the building. They gave you nasty, judgmental, looks. It seemed they didn’t like you being there. This was nothing new, Adam’s neighbors had made it evidently clear that you did not belong here. They hardly let you pass by them without making sharp remarks. Adam was the reason they stopped. Self-consciously, you walked by and up the stairs, to Adam’s room. It was silent all the way there.

When you creaked the door open you were unsatisfied to find the lights turned off, the windows shuttered and Adam’s coat missing from the coat hanger, as well as his shoes missing from their place by the door. You clicked the door closed behind you, and ventured inside hesitantly. “Adam?” Your voice echoed lonely around the entire room. You flicked on the lights.

They buzzed dully, but you didn’t mind. Adam’s camera wasn’t on the coffee table. His ashtray hadn’t been emptied yet today. The smoke scent was strong, but you tried not to think about it.

You checked, halfheartedly, in the bedroom and the bathroom, and - of course - Adam’s dark room. Apparently, he wasn’t home. Where was he?

You had been with Adam for at least three years. You both thought it was best to take things slow for a while, whilst he recovered mentally from Jigsaw’s game. You were proud of him. He had come a long way from where he was before, though sometimes he would still have panic attacks, as was understandable.

Lately though, the two of you had been thinking about moving in together. It was Adam’s idea actually, and you had been surprised when he brought it up. Of course you could understand that his apartment might not be the healthiest place for Adam to be, but it was the only place that had a dark room available. It seemed Adam was ready to leave the trauma of the past behind completely now and start new. You would love to support him through that.

He had asked you to come over today, to maybe help with packing but maybe not; he hadn’t been precise about that. You wandered around for a couple minutes longer, and then figured you had no reason being here, and left.

Standing on the staircase in the wind, you tried to call your boyfriend, but he didn’t pick up his phone. This alarmed you because usually he was quick to answer his calls, especially if it was you calling. You called your best friend. Maybe they would know?

“Hello?”

Yes! You got an answer!

“Hi.”

“Y/N! Oh, W-What do you need?”

You noticed how your friend had stammered.

What the hell?

“Uh…” You said thoughtfully. “I was looking for Adam. Have you seen him?”

“No.” The response was too instantaneous for your liking.

“You haven’t seen him? Do you know where he is?”

Silence on the other end, then, “No.”

“ ‘No’?” You repeated skeptically.

“No,” your bff confirmed.

You frowned. “Well, will you call him for me? He won’t pick up. I tried calling him just now, but I also tried at my apartment.”

“Why don’t you wait? He’ll be back before long. Or are you paranoid that he’s seeing someone else?” There was a suspicious silence and then your friend burst out laughing. “Relax, I’m joking.”

“I am relaxed,” you said matter-of-factly. “You don’t have to tell me that he wouldn’t cheat on me. I know that, you idiot.”

“Awe. Did you hear that? Yeah? I know.”

Your friend was having a conversation with someone else, but you couldn’t hear who it was. You couldn’t hear them at all. “Who are you with?”

“One of the other friends. Now we will have juicy gossip for the group.”

“Right,” you sighed irritably. “Where is Adam? I thought we were going to pack some things so he could move in with me?”

“I don’t know,” your best friend sounded genuine. “Listen, Y/N, I don't know where he went, and I would love to help you but I’m busy right now. I’m sorry. Maybe just wait for him to get back. He’ll answer you when he returns to the apartment.”

“Okay, well, should I start packing up his things, or not?”

“It’s up to you.”

“I’m at his apartment right now.”

“Sure. I mean, he would probably appreciate the help.”

“Really, you’re sure you don’t know where he is?”

Your best friend only said, “I’m sorry, Y/N.” And hung up.

You scowled at the floor in annoyance. That had been uneventful… There was definitely something up with them though. That was some seriously strange behavior.

You gathered up your things once again, and went back inside. This time the hall was empty, no passersby to see you. You were mildly grateful for that.

You started in the living room, examining certain things and contemplating what to do with them. For now, you were just gonna leave everything in its place because you didn’t know how Adam wanted to situate his any of if for moving. You would just consider solutions and strategies and then consult your boyfriend when he got home. Whenever that would be.

Sitting on the couch to get comfortable while you waited, you pushed open the windows. While you tolerated the smoke smell for Adam, this was obnoxious. Why were the windows closed when the scent was so strong? You pushed a window open just as your phone lit up with a message.

You lunged for it, hoping it was Adam. You were disappointed to find that it was just a scam text asking you to click the link to some sketchy porn site. You made a face in disgust. That kind of thing did not hold your interest… Unless of course you were performing with Adam...

You tossed the phone next to you onto the couch, and went back to opening up windows, though your thoughts were now preoccupied about what kind of THINGS you might get up to with Adam, since you were on the subject already…

Unfortunately, you thought reluctantly. Adam isn’t here for me to ‘perform’ anything with.

You spent about fifteen minutes sitting on the couch, trying to figure out packing arrangements. There were already some things put in boxes and sealed away, but mostly everything was piled everywhere. You did notice though, Adam’s camera resting carefully and securely on the breakfast table. It was evident that Adam took more care of his very expensive camera than the rest of his belongings. This did not surprise you.

Absently, you picked it up in your delicate hands, and turned it over a few times. Adam would be panicking if he was here; he got way too anxious if the camera wasn’t in his own hands. But… he was not here… Which - you should have admitted to yourself first, but were too preoccupied with your discovery - this fact did not give you permission to go snooping through his privacy.

Hesitantly, you turned it on. It came on immediately, which only made you realize even more how good this camera was. This was like, top-notch perfect. No wonder it had been so expensive. No wonder Adam took such good care of it. No wonder he preserved it like it was the last one in existence. This was a damn good camera.

It felt cool on your fingers, and the buttons worked perfectly. None of them were sticky, or oversensitive. Just one gentle tap was enough to get the desired reaction.

And not to mention the photos inside. Adam had a talent for photography, that much was already apparent, but these were like… nothing you’d ever seen. They were clear, and straight on. Sometimes they were from angles so that the sun crossed right over the lens.

There were pictures of people, mostly you and sometimes Adam, but there were mostly pictures of the scenery. This must not have been his work camera, though even that one was just as expensive as this one.

Your breath had been taken from you, as you set his camera back on the table. The photos he’d taken of you were… amazing… Well, all his photos were amazing, but you hadn’t thought that you could be highlighted in such an incredible way. You hadn't even looked through all of them because you did feel guilty about prying. Adam would show you when he was ready to show you, and that’s what you were looking forward to.

You went back to the couch and peered out the window. There was traffic on this tiny road? Bizarre. Usually this street was empty. Police lights flashed passed and then the traffic cleared.

Frowning, you considered a fact about today. Today so far had been really, really, strange… You hadn’t found your boyfriend, even after a long time of searching, your bff seemed to be hiding something, and the events of the day were just weird; like for example a police car driving down the quietest street in your town.

For the first time you felt a little off, like you had teleported through another dimension and no one even knew who you were. It was an alarming feeling. You didn’t like it.

You stretched your legs out on the coffee table, wondering if Adam would mind if you turned on the TV. It seemed a little inappropriate to just… be at his house while he wasn’t there, but you were really freaked out, and… watching something to get your mind off it seemed like the best course of action. Or maybe you should just go home? That was a smart idea, right now you were essentially trespassing!

But… Adam would be home any second now, you were sure of it. Just a little longer… Just a few more minutes wouldn’t hurt anyone, and besides Adam wasn’t going to report his girlfriend for trespassing. He would understand.

Where is he? I haven’t seen him all day. I worry about him sometimes, does he know that?

After a moment’s hesitation, you took the TV remote into your hand. It was then that the door was pushed open wide, casting light into the dark room, and revealing a very tense Adam Faulkner Stanheight.

The remote slipped from your fingers dejectedly, hitting the floor with a quiet thud as you were no longer interested in it anymore. Running for your boyfriend, you called his name a couple times, apologizing for the unintended hangout at his place.

Adam smiled at you warmly, as he wrapped his arms around your waist and bent his head down to kiss you. You leaned into it willingly, moaning in surprise.

Adam pulled his head away again, and examined you. There was a gleam of adoration in his eyes. He shivered, and, without even looking away from you, said, “You opened the windows?”

You were flabbergasted. This man didn’t have to look to know you had opened them; he was so… amazing… “Yeah,” you whispered.

Adam raised a hand to your cheek, and held it for a moment, then brushed a strand of hair out of your face. His hand was warm and gentle. You pushed your head into his grasp. It was silent between you for a long time. Neither of you broke eye contact, or pulled away. This moment was perfect; exactly what you both needed.

“Adam?” You asked eventually.

Adam’s gaze flickered down your face for a moment, then back to your eyes. “Hmm?” He seemed so at peace, you didn’t want to bother him with the question.

“Where have you been?”

“ ‘Where have I been’?” Adam wondered aloud. “Well, let’s see…” He trailed off as your best friend walked into the room.

“I’mma watch the action’ah,” they popped their lips at the end.

You spun around to face them. “What are you doing? I thought you were with friends?”

“Adam’s my friend, isn’t he?”

You stared back at your bff, feeling slightly indignant, and jealous. “What the hell!?”

Your friend only nodded to Adam, a smile on their face. “Don’t jump to conclusions, baby.” There was sarcasm in their voice on the last word.

Flustered, you turned back around in a rush, not able to look at your friend anymore. You were sure it wasn’t what you thought it was, but why had they gone off to do something without you? Something wasn’t right about that.

You nearly fainted at what was in front of you.

On one knee, with his hands outstretched, was your boyfriend, looking rather smug with himself. A ring was placed in the middle of a tiny, black, box. “Will you marry me, F/N L/N?” He asked very bluntly.

Your heart seemed to stop beating. Your mind seemed to shut off. You were just… so stunned you were unemotional. All you could do was stare at Adam. “I-I-I-” You stopped talking at once.

The two others in the room were watching you intently, stiffly, apprehensively.

“I,” you found your voice finally. “Don't know what to say!”

Adam looked at you dumbly. “ ‘Yes’? ‘Yes’ would be preferable, please!”

And you realized that, in your current state of bliss, you had indeed forgotten to enlighten your boyfriend on your answer, which to yourself had been obvious - of course! You would spend everything to marry Adam! That’s what love was, right?

“Yes!” You exclaimed guiltily. “I’m so sorry, I was so shocked, you know? ‘Cause I wasn’t even thinking about the question, I was just thinking about the state of affairs, I can’t believe that this is happening right now, you know, I didn’t mean to leave you -” You said in a single breath. You were so busy you didn’t even notice when Adam stood up. In one fell swoop, Adam’s lips were back on yours, silencing you abruptly. You melted into his embrace, bringing your arms up around his neck, pushing into him, giving him all of yourself.

Your heart fluttered, your cheeks were hot, and your lips were tingling. Inside you felt a thousand things at once, but all of them were stemmed by one thing - joy. Adam pulled you closer to him, if that was even possible; you both were already practically standing on top of each other's feet. A couple of gasps and sighs were released but it was nothing that forced you to stop the make-out session. In fact, it only encouraged it more.

Somewhere behind you both, your friend arranged themself on the couch, tucking their feet under their butt, and staring, eyes wide, at the scene in front of them. If there was popcorn, they’d definitely be eating right now.

Adam let his hands trail your body, and you allowed him to feel you. He stopped kissing you to whisper in your ear, “I love you. I’m sorry I ditched you earlier, but… I do love you.”

“(bff’s name) was with you, buying the ring?”

Adam nodded. “Yeah. I didn’t want to get it wrong.”

“You wouldn’t have,” you whispered back, burying your face into his shoulder. “All that would matter was that you got me something beautiful. All gems are gorgeous, I think. Especially if they’re on a ring.”

Adam hadn’t gotten you something large, but you appreciated that, you had room to move your fingers. But it was still a very pretty color. Your favorite gemstone was in the middle, and the ring part was embedded with your birthstone. You couldn’t believe how pretty it looked altogether. “Adam,” you murmured desperately. Adam brushed his fingers through your hair. “I wouldn’t have made it this far without you, Y/N.”

“Don’t say that.”

“No,” Adam insisted. “You convinced me to keep up the photography. You convinced me to get therapy. You convinced me to… try to stop smoking…”

You laughed. “Yeah. The last one has yet to work. I don’t think I did very much convincing.”

“You convinced me to propose,” Adam admitted attentively.

You pulled back, smiling in amusement. “How so?”

“Well, last night, after -” he seemed to remember that there were more than TWO people in the room with you and started again. “What you said last night got me thinking about how much I love you.”

“Adam.” You shook your head dishearteningly. You hadn’t meant to pressure him. “I said ‘we have a unique relationship, I wonder where it will take us,’ not ‘I want you to propose to me tomorrow.’

“I do want this, though,” Adam continued hastily. “I was just nervous before. But what you said last night convinced me that I was ready to take things to a different level with you.”

“Well I’m glad you asked, because I want this, too. And the answer would have always been ‘yes’. And I’m glad that you want this. That’s what’s important.”

“It’s also important what you want,” Adam chimed in.

But I’M not the one with the trauma, you thought to yourself. You wouldn’t bring THAT up right now, but that was the reason why your relationship was moving slowly. You chuckled under your breath. Adam was way too wholesome for you.

“What?” Adam asked. “What did I say?”

You grit your teeth. “Nothing,” you told him firmly. “I’m just happy that you're happy.”

Adam smiled at you, then looked up at the third wheeler on the couch, who was leaning over their legs in utter astonishment. “Was that good?” He questioned.

“That was wonderful,” your friend exclaimed.

“Adam needed a pep talk? Really?”

“No, Adam needed confidence,” your bff retorted, then stretched and stood up lazily. “I think I’ll be leaving now. I don’t think I’m of any service here anymore.”

The couple didn’t object to the previously stated statement, in fact they were in full agreement. You watched your friend exit the apartment, and then close the door behind them. “So did you get any packing done?” Adam wondered hopefully. “You said you were going to.”

“I did some planning. But I wanted to confirm it with you first,” you confessed.

“Oh.” Adam shrugged. “I have no idea how to start! Anything works!”

“Nice!” You said, all your ideas coming to the front of your mind. “Let’s do it tomorrow, yeah? I’m tired. You know I was up late LAST NIGHT.”

Adam scoffed. “Baby, how could I forget LAST NIGHT?”

You walked into the bedroom, with Adam following closely - too closely. You got the sense that tonight and last night were going to be pretty similar. There was one key difference though. Could you guess it?

Of course.

You weren’t going to sleep next to your boyfriend anymore, you were going to sleep next to your fiance.

Now what did you think about that?

Don't Forget About Me - Adam Stanheight / Reader

18 + A/N I dunno 'bout all y'all's... limitations... but this is strangely more detailed than what I've written... So like... have a warning just in case. Y'all lmk if it was needed

. 18 +

You woke up at eleven thirty in the morning. The room was bright with sunlight, which was being cast into the room from the window above the bed. There was a golden glow to the atmosphere, leaving a warmness to the air. You gazed up at the ceiling for a couple moments, feeling tired. It was cold in the room and you didn’t want to get out of the comfy bed. If it wasn’t for the empty side of the bed, you would have contemplated the idea, but sadly it appeared that your boyfriend was already up. That encouraged you to meet with him this morning.

Throwing off the blankets, and stepping out of bed, you shivered at the cold as it brushed along your skin. The wood floor felt like dry soap on your feet, and it splintered and creaked whenever you walked on it. You approached the dresser you shared with Adam Faulkner Stanheight; it was standing to the side of the room, up against the wall, looking lonely and old. It had a clutter of objects on top of it, mostly photo albums of you and him, most of which were half empty. You wondered why Adam didn’t just finish one before starting another.

Dazedly, you opened up the top drawer. Inside it were a mix of your shirts and your boyfriend’s shirts. You rummaged around for a little bit, before throwing on one of his white tees.

It was soft and silky, and smelled of him. You hugged it closer.

Stepping into the bright living room, your eyes were blinded by the harsh, overhead lights. You squinted instinctively, as pain hurt your temples for a short moment. It faded after a couple of seconds, allowing you to get your surroundings.

Your boyfriend was sifting through some recently taken pictures. You didn’t recognize them; they must have been photos of a client.

You sat down next to him, feeling fatigued and sleepy. Adam barely looked at you, but he did greet you brightly.

You leaned your head on his shoulder, and watched him sort photos. It was a very methodical process, rather soothing in fact.

Adam put down the last photo and looked at you. Your face was pale white, and you had dark circles under your eyes. Your eyelids blinked slowly, like you were about to fall asleep at any second.

“How’s your morning, Y/N?”

“Good, I think,” you mumbled.

“How’d you sleep last night?”

“Good, I think,” you repeated.

Adam stared at you blankly. “How about we get you some breakfast?”

“Sure.” You curled up on the couch with your legs under you.

Adam didn’t leave your side on the couch though, despite having offered you breakfast. Instead he dropped an arm onto your shoulders, and leaned in close.

You could feel his body heat from the close proximity. Blood rushed up your cheeks, and made you dizzy. Your stomach felt like it was being twisted with prickly rope. You swallowed nervously, your throat suddenly dry. “Oh… H-Hi Adam…”

“Hi, sweet thing,” Adam murmured.

He examined your face carefully, and then started to palm your stomach with his hands. You smiled at him, shyly.

Stanheight brushed his lips over yours briefly, you could feel light tingles of expectance travel down your jaws.

“Mmmmh,” you breathed.

Adam kissed you gently, his hands rising up your shirt. “That shirt looks good on you,” he informed you. “Much better than it could look on me…” he gripped the end of it, and started to pull it over your head. Chills ran up your skin.

Slowly, your boyfriend pinned you up against the couch cushions. His thumbs played in circles over your stomach. You were forced to relax under his insistent domination.

Adam pressed up closer to you, biting your lower lip delicately, leading to a high powered make-out session.

His lips were firm on yours but somehow managed to remain harmless. It was like drinking Hershey’s Syrup; so good you couldn’t get enough.

You moaned out a little bit, feeling the sweetness enter your mouth, and squirmed at the delicious aftertaste. It was warm and invigorating. You slid right up next to him. “Hmm. I love you, Adam…”

Adam blinked at you. “I don’t think you can love me as much as I love you,” he purred directly into your ear. He sent soft kisses down your jaw enticingly. “Lean back.”

You did as you were told, almost too eagerly. Adam turned your head towards him, keeping his mouth on yours. His hands caressed your cheeks and ears soothingly, pulling his fingers through your hair.

More Hershey’s syrup was poured down your throat. You gagged a little bit at Adam’s aggressiveness. Adam pulled back after a couple of minutes, panting. “Lay down,” he told you. “Make yourself pretty.”

You laid down on the couch, adjusting yourself carefully. Adam was watching you intently, making you feel extra self-aware. You kept moving, trying to please Adam with your best efforts. It was hard to tell what he was thinking under his calculating gaze. You felt completely vulnerable laying on your back with nothing but your underwear on. It made you apprehensive.

After a while you managed to twist yourself up in a way that appeared painful, it wasn’t though. Adam straddled you then. “That’s fine, baby. Thank you.”

You felt him cover you like a heavy blanket. You grunted at the weight, but Adam seemed to know exactly what he was doing.

“Do you know how lovely you look in my clothes? I wish you wore my shirts more often, you look so good in them, baby.” You opened your mouth to respond, but Faulkner covered it with his palm, and leaned over. “Perfectly fuckable, even.”

Your eyes stretched wide, and you groaned quietly into his hand. Adam seemed to relish the sight of his significant other looking up at him desperately. “Adam…” You muttered around his fingers.

“Where were you yesterday, anyway? I was missing you.”

“I was busy…” you informed him. “I had an appointment.”

“Where are you going today?”

“Well, I had made plans last week to meet up with a friend. You were invited, of course!”

“Reschedule,” Adam advised. “I think you’re gonna miss it.”

You squeaked. “S-Sure. Let me grab my pho-”

Adam pushed you down again. “Oh, no. I don’t think they’ll mind if you inform them afterwards.”

“Um…” You looked at your boyfriend, conflicted. “I want to be with them, too, you know. I’m excited about this trip.”

“When do you have to leave?” Adam’s voice was low and ominous. He started rubbing your stomach again.

“At one…” you whispered.

Adam shrugged, and started to pull the last piece of clothing from your body. He chuckled smugly. “We have plenty of time, dearest. I’ll even treat you to lunch, seeing as you won’t be having breakfast.”

You squished yourself further into the mattress. “Woah…” you said. “You really think so?”

“Ha. I’d bet a million dollars on it. Now lay down and let me fuck you, baby. I’ve been waiting all morning.”

“You don’t even have a million dollars,” you retorted.

“Obviously,” Adam cast one miserable glance around the tattered living room. “If I did, would I be fucking you in this shitty apartment?”

“Probably not…”

“ ‘Probably not’? Definitely not. Baby, I’d spend more money on you than whatever the fuck this is. I’d spend more like… fifty-two thousand dollars, or something. Enough for a suitable place to live and… a wedding. But… I don’t have that either.”

“Awe…” you couldn’t stop the smile from forming on your face. Adam’s words made you really happy. “I don’t care where we live, as long as I’m with you, baby. That’s all that matters to me.”

“Well look at that. You’ve outdone me, sweetie. Here I was planning our future, and all you have to do is remind us of our pleasant reality. I love you, baby.”

You sighed awkwardly..

“Now let’s get on with it, shall we? Don’t want to be late for your hang out.”

“No…”

“Good. Scream extra loud for me, okay? The window’s open.”

You glanced up in alarm, horror filling you. “Uh- What!?” But Adam started messaging you with his hands; rolling them up your stomach and chest, meanwhile his mouth planted firmly on your own.

It was too late to change anything now. Good luck my dear reader. ;)

Dreaming of You - Adam Stanheight / Reader

A/N I've been inspired to write this for a long time. Water Fountain - Alec Benjamin - inspired it.

.

The hot wind blew into your face and blistered your skin. It was one hundred and six degrees this summer but you didn’t mind, not now that your emotions were so laid back. The past year was over, and you didn’t feel good about it at all; all you felt was numb. Your heart was heavy, your stomach was sick, and your head hurt painfully. You gazed at the beautiful water fountain in front of you. The water rose and fell methodically, flaring out prettily at the top and splashing a little over the edge.

You closed your eyes, trying to clear your head, when you felt a soft, gentle, hand on your shoulder. The scent of tart, metallic, smoke came from behind you. You grit your teeth in frustration, trying to center yourself. The voice that spoke out was calm, and familiar. Just a little higher in pitch than you would expect for such a man. “Hey, Y/N.”

You couldn’t keep your feet planted in one place, even though you knew you should. “Adam!” You exclaimed brightly, spinning around quickly. You flung your arms around his shoulders despite yourself. You really couldn’t help it, you needed this right now. Reality was just too harsh at the moment.

“Hey, baby!” Adam smiled at you warmly, wrapping his arms around your waist.

You rested your head on his chest, letting the softness of his white tee sooth you. You let out a deep sigh. “Adam…” you breathed. “I was wondering when you’d come find me.”

Adam lifted his hands up, and brushed his fingers through your hair. “Darling, of course I’d find you. I’d never leave you.”

You gazed up at him sadly, not feeling secure. You hadn’t felt secure for the last twelve months. “I thought I’d lost you forever, remember? Sometimes, I still feel that.”

Adam looked at the fountain solemnly. “Yeah. I do, too. But it’s over now. You don’t have to worry about that anymore. I love you, and that’s all that matters. Why don’t we go home?”

You shook your head. Somehow, you weren’t ready to leave this place yet. “No. Not quite. I… need a little more time… I miss you…”

“ ‘Miss’ me?” Adam asked you skeptically. “Baby, I’ve been here the whole time. You went to look at the fountain, remember?”

“Oh…” you grumbled dishearteningly. “Y-Yeah. I do now.”

“Oh, sweet-pea, please cheer up. It’s like you’ve lost a puppy, or something. Come on. Come here.” Adam plopped you on the edge of the water fountain, and sat on your lap. He cupped your cheeks with both hands. They were soft and warm, and his breath traveled down your neck and gave you goosebumps. You leaned your head back, allowing Adam to start kissing you. You smiled at the clear sky and sighed heavily. Holy shit, this was what you had needed during that last year. “Where were you?” You murmured.

“What do you mean?” Adam asked you in annoyance, his lips barely removing themselves from your skin. “I’VE BEEN HERE. I DIDN’T GO ANYWHERE.” He emphasized every word.

You looked at him happily. “Mmmh. I know. It just feels… like… We’ve been away for a long time… I don’t know…”

Adam lifted his mouth up to yours. “Now where have you been getting those ideas? You’re always allowed into my dark room, you know. I’d love your company, baby. Just don’t touch anything, please. I put a lot of work into those photos.”

Your heart melted. You pressed yourself closer to him. “Of course. I’m sorry. I should have thought of that. Of course that’s why I feel so lonely.”

Adam rubbed your head, and then wrapped his hands around your waist. He pulled your hips forward, brought your head in real close and kissed you. “You don’t deserve that loneliness, darling,” he whispered in your ear. “Come produce photos with me one day.”

You felt so light and overwhelmed. You were giddy, and very much at a loss for words. You gaped at him. “Just kiss me,” you begged him longingly.

“There’s the Y/N I know. Finally coming back to yourself, I see? Let’s keep it that way, yeah? No more dosage of depression, please. I just want my baby back…”

His words struck your nerves. You could feel heat rising in your cheeks, and butterflies flying in your stomach. You reached out your arms and wound them around Adam’s shoulders. “I love you,” you whispered. It was all you could think of to say.

“I love you, too.”

Adam kissed you again, harder this time, with much more passion.

More heat.

More excitement.

More lust.

You felt like an angel floating through heaven, Adam’s way of pleasing you was just so perfect. You wrapped your legs around his waist, Adam adjusted himself on your lap. “You like this?” He questioned softly in your ear.

So much!

There were no words to explain how you felt right now. You felt… Happy… That was the most important thing right now, not feeling sad anymore.

You felt safe.

You felt glad.

You felt… hmmm… perhaps that one wasn’t meant for public ears…

“Baby,” you practically whimpered out in desperation. “I-I…” your voice trailed off as you spoke. Shyly, you forced yourself to finish the sentence you started; there was no turning back now. “...Want you.”

Adam only looked at you smugly. One eyebrow was raised, and there was a crooked smirk on his face, as his villainous gaze observed you thoughtfully. But he didn’t say anything. Not a single word. He didn’t make a move, either. You both sat there in silence.

“Adam,” you broke the silence eventually. You were confused. What had you said to make him zone out like that? “Did I do something?”

“No!” Adam objected immediately. “You did nothing wrong… but I’m just wondering how long you plan on staying here. Your ass is nearly falling off the fountain.”

“No, it’s not!” You exclaimed. It was true. You were sitting firmly on the edge of the water fountain. “Oh… Sorry…” Adam mumbled awkwardly. “The angle looked weird from here.” He laughed , but it was forced.

“This is the fountain, isn’t it?” You asked, abruptly changing the subject. “You said, if you could have a water fountain in our house, this would be the one. Didn’t you?"

Adam peered past you to the fountain. “Yeah. I think it would be cool if we could have a water fountain in the yard, or something like that. I’m still not sure about all the details.”

You smiled to yourself. “It’s okay. I like the idea. Just keep fantasizing, we’ll figure it out.”

“I think it’s time we left. It’s getting dark, doesn’t that worry you?”

“Nah,” you said casually. “I’m just… here. I’m… happy.”

Adam looked at you miserably for a moment. “Y-Yeah. Yeah. I’m glad to see you happy.”

“You don’t look like it.”

Adam kissed you once more. “It’s not that at all. I’M worried about being out late. But we can stay since you want to so badly.”

You beamed up at him, eyes gleaming. “Thanks, Adam.”

Adam pulled his fingers through your hair. “I should’ve built a home with a fountain for us,” he hummed out quietly. “The moment that you told me that you were in love.”

Adam started to flicker and fade. It alarmed you because you could still hear his voice in your ears and feel his touch on your body. It was a rare collision of flickering, but still you were beginning to see through him like a foggy window. The real world was breaking through your illusion.

Your eyes kept fluttering open and closed over and over again, until finally you woke up for good. Your back hurt, your head hurt, your butt also hurt; and you realized then that you were nearly falling off the edge of the water fountain.

The streetlamps were on all along the sidewalk, illuminating the darkness slightly. Sunset had passed a long time ago, obviously.

To the side, there was music playing. A quiet melody that no one but you could hear. However, now that there were no more people around to bring sound to counter it, the entire cemetery was filled with your music. “Now I’m grabbing her hips, and pulling her in. Kissing her lips, and whispering in her ear and I know that it’s only a wish. And that we’re not standing by the water fountain.”

How long have I been listening to the same song? You wondered. I didn’t know it was on repeat! I think my favorite song is after this… No wait, you realized. That can’t be right. If my favorite song was after this, I would have skipped this one completely!

You looked around the gloomy cemetery one last time. While you had been unable to assign the water fountain to Adam, you had been able to get the cemetery to put it in as a memorial for ALL of its occupants. It still stung. “I’m sorry,” you said.

Lifting yourself from the fountain, you found yourself unsteady. You stumbled down the hill, and looked back up at the water fountain. Your heart was heavy and sore. You didn’t want to leave this place, not when it gave you so much comfort.

So much relief.

You stared at the gravestone closest to the fountain. You couldn’t read it from this distance, but you knew what was on it. Your boyfriend’s full name. It tore you apart, it really did. You didn’t know how you could manage this all on your own. You didn’t know how you could SURVIVE. You didn’t want to leave Adam behind. You simply wanted to be with him one more time. “I just…” you stammered out loud. You tripped over your words for a short moment.

Frustrated you blurted out your thoughts honestly. The truth always hurt more the longer you held it in. Your words were cold, and blew away in the frost, up towards Adam’s resting place, but sometimes telling the truth was all one needed to feel better. Standing in the chill, as the clock struck twelve, you muttered to yourself dejectedly,

Horridly,

Depressingly,

“I still love you, baby.”

Hi... I'm new... I'm so nervous, but It's twelve forty in the morning, and I am feeling confident? What's that about? Well, I just wanted to let people know that I'm here! Hi! Welcome!

I like to write, so that's what this account is. Probably mostly fanfiction. I like writing readers specifically. And I recently watched the SAW movies, which were amazing, highly recommend. But I kinda fell in love with Adam Faulkner so... I'll be writing about him. But please excuse me for any delays. I have social anxiety, so working up courage will be hard. But I will still do it.

BTW I'm nervous AF, right now, but I am just doing it, otherwise I would never have done it. So, yeah... Please enjoy my stuff... which doesn't exist yet, so... good luck... :)

Quietus - Adam Stanheight / Reader

You felt like you had just woken up from a nice, long, nap in the bath, during the summer. There was nothing to be worried about, nothing to be excited about, nothing to be angry about, and nothing to be sad about; it was just a quiet evening, and you felt peaceful and calm. Your skin felt warm, and your hair felt clean, and as you crossed, you felt a tingling in your hands and feet.

The carpet was soft on your feet as you walked over it, it's smoothness was gentle on your skin and you liked it very much. You had never thought that the feel of carpet would please you so much, but this texture was truly exquisite. You took slow, savory, steps just so that you could have a reason to remain standing on it. The light over head was pale, almost like that of the dawn when it breaches your window frame and sets your bedroom aglow. There was something picturesque about how the dull light appeared; phantom like and basically transparent. It was an odd white color, not one that would usually be used for lighting; you didn't quite understand it but you proceeded down the dark void all the same.

Around you, there were black walls, above you blue-white lights, and below you gray ground, that could possibly be clear if you thought about it too long; you could make out, just slightly, hardly anything really, movement of some kind underneath the grayness of the floor. As you walked, you let your thoughts take a hold of your mind. There was something not right about this place, something unusual, something concerning. Was it all the blacks and greys strewn about, or the dark atmosphere? How about the way the lights flickered ever so slightly but just enough to notice, or the way that they warmed up the place just by being on? Perhaps it was the walls that misted when you touched them and the way they felt like liquid when you got close? Maybe it was simply a reality, and you were too tired to figure it out?

It was natural though, the manner in which you moved along. It was almost like it was meant to be; so overpowering you HAD to keep going. You didn't know how far you had come or how long you had been here, all you knew was that this is where you were now, and where you would be for a long while.

Forwards was the only way to go. Forwards would take you to your destined destination. And who was to know where backwards led. That, unfortunately, was not for you to discover.

By now you had left behind the carpet, but that was already such a long time ago you just hadn't realized it when it happened. The tile floor was cool and liquidy. It was like placing your foot on the top of water. You could feel the coldness on the bottom of your foot and in between your toes, it confused you completely.

Finally, before you noticed the opening in the hallway, you heard voices. Two of them were unfamiliar but one of them was so recognizable, so impalpable, it frustrated you. Where had you heard it before?

The lights flickered randomly then, as if trying to give an incapacitated answer to your question. You didn't try to understand it, in fact you didn't try think about it at all, and you went right back to your meandering. When you reached the clearing, which was nothing but a room filled with black walls and grey floor, you could hear the voices more clearly. They were coming from inside. You peered into the small, plain, room almost halfheartedly. It was now that you were starting to feel concerned. You hadn't before, mostly just exceptionally laid back.

What felt like hours was probably only a matter of seconds, but your pumping heart and adrenaline made it seem like longer. You trailed into the room finally, it was the first time since entering this dank place that you had gotten somewhere. As you crept inside, you could smell a familiar smell, and taste a familiar taste. You could hear a familiar sound, and feel a familiar feeling. In front of you was a young man, probably about twenty, in his usual attire. Of course you knew who this was, but what the hell was he doing here? Or maybe a better question was: what were you doing here?

The warmth that had been with you this whole time left now, encasing you in bitter cold. You shivered, hoping to get warm by such an inefficient gesture. It was stupid, pathetic, and didn't work anyway.

You tiptoed over to the man, who was waiting for you in the middle of the room. He had his arms crossed over his chest, and his head tilted back slightly. There was a thin, white, cigarette in the corner of his mouth. You fell instantly, like you always did. The sight reminded you of a picture you had at your apartment. It was of your boyfriend with his head leaned back on the couch, and a cigarette - much like the one in front of you now - in his mouth. Adam Stanheight stood before you in all his glory, making you heart stop. You couldn't find words to explain yourself; the silence was deafening.

However, it wasn't for you to reply, Adam had that covered; he had planned this for a while now. Of course your death was entirely up to fate, he couldn't have had chosen that if he'd tried, but all the same, he'd planned out what to say when you arrived. "F/N L/N." There was a small smile on his lips. The one you'd seen many times before. It always presented itself when he was going to be smug. There was a different kind of smile he gave you when he was happy, this was not that smile. "What have you done to find yourself all the way up here?"

You could feel yourself smiling back. You knew he was joking, but you still smiled at him. You couldn't find words to say anything, you didn't know what was worth saying anyway. You remained silent, and Adam was unbothered.

"I guess it's been a while," he sighed. "I was confused, too, at first. But that's the strange thing, all of us are different. It just takes longer to adjust than it does for others. Maybe I was more fortunate? There's really no way to tell yet, not since you've only just arrived. We'll see how you're feeling in forty eight hours. A lot can change over the course of two days here, you might be surprised. But you'll see what I mean. It's been like a year since that day, so I've gotten pretty used to everything. I am still surprised it only took a year. I thought I would never get over it."

You stared at him for a long time, but still didn't speak.

"Can you remember anything?" Adam asked you lightly.

You thought about his question, but eventually you found your voice. "No."

Adam seemed impressed. "I'm glad to see you warming up, Y/N. Most people don't recover quickly."

"I think..." You stammered, your voice cracking along the way. "I think it helps that you are here."

Adam nodded briefly. "That was the intention. Do you remember anything now?"

You shook your head. "Remember what?"

"How you died."

You considered his words gravely. "Do you?"

"I was watching," Adam informed you. "The accident was... brutal... The car-" he interrupted himself. "Well let's just say, 'it exploded.' Shards went everywhere." He shuddered. "It's no wonder you came to join me. There was another person with you, and neither of you survived it."

Your mouth fell open as memories flashed through your mind. The car, the leaves, the wind. The driving, the spinning, the screaming. The final, abrupt, moment in which your life was taking away from you. You turned your head away dismissively, letting out a calming breath. "Meh," you found yourself saying. "It's alright that it's over. I don't mind the quietness or tranquility. It's nice, like..." You trailed off, and didn't say more.

Adam pulled you into a side hug. "I know the feeling."

You stared at the ground dully, letting Adam's presence sooth you. "So," you asked. "Now what?"

"Now," Adam replied. "I take you through there." He glanced over his shoulder. There was another opening behind you, leading out of the room. A long void stretched away from it.

"There?" You asked. "Where's it go?"

Adam only looked at you sadly, but didn't answer you. He guided you to the entrance and you followed slowly, feeling numb. Adam kept his arm around your waist as you walked. You could sense his urgency, but you didn't know why. You didn't know where he was going, or what was happening, but you trusted Adam. You pressed yourself closer as you continued down the dark, liquid, hall.

As the time passed, you started to relax. You felt really safe here, in Adam's warm and comforting embrace. Finally, you reached another room that was just as dim, and just as tiny, as the last one. By now, you had identified the feeling you were trying to explain before, only this time it was much more severe, overwhelming. You clutched Adam's hand tightly, and spoke up at last. "Adam, it's like..."

Adam ushered you inside. "I'll see you on the other side, baby. But unfortunately, I can't go with you for this part. Don't worry, you'll see me again, I promise. I'll be waiting for you."

"Wait," you whispered, and Adam smiled at you. He looked so reposeful and patient, like he had all the time in the world, and maybe he did; it was like he knew all the answers to life itself. You gazed at him. "It's like..." Your voice sounded melodic. "It's like," You repeated for a third time. "Like, I'm finally coming home..."

Adam let out a breath. There was a gleam in his eyes, one that told you he was content, and he said, "Yes, you are. It's such a scary place to call home, but it's almost terrifying how lovable a place can be once you start to live in it."

"Don't go," you mumbled desperately.

"I won't," Adam replied happily, and closed the door in front of you, leaving you all alone and in your impending doom. Unbeknownst to you, Adam was waiting in the room over. Neither of you knew how long it would take you to find him again but you knew that you would; and when you did, home would be right around the corner.