Witty - Tumblr Posts

Funny Childfree Gamer Shirt

Funny T-shirt for gamers who don't want kids.

Okay which episode is this from! I need answers so please help!

Me about a lot of people.

Magically genius, and quite creative! More Feitan for the fans- yeeesss, MOOORRREEE~ 😍🖤💗💕✨✨✨

I wondered why Feitan has straight hair now for way too long.

incredible how much housework you can get done if you take a chance and believe in yourself and also have fifteen other much more pressing responsibilities

"I have faults enough, but they are not, I hope, of understanding. My temper I dare not vouch for. - It is I believe too little yielding - certainly too little for the convenience of the world."

Pride & Prejudice, Volume One, Chapter Eleven

moon in gemini

erratic, emotionally inward, witty and charming, can be moody, curious to a fault, restlessness is common, easily bored by routine, difficult to please on an emotional level, sociable and friendly, open to new ideas

Accurate 🙈🌙

gemini moon culture 🎇🍒🖤

🎭Loving to exchange opinions and various ideas.🎭Your moods can be easily influenced, but never your thoughts or principles.🎭Not settling until you’ve had plenty of time to explore yourself and discover your desires.🎭Hating boredom of any kind, so you constantly try and keep yourself busy with new activities.🎭Being great with witty comebacks.🎭Having trouble dealing with your emotions and frequently hiding them behind words and humor.

Aw damn it, I got Venus and Jupiter in 10th house 😅

The Astrology of Humor

Humor is ruled by Mercury, Venus, Jupiter, and, in some accounts, the Moon.

Mercury represents humor in or from communication and/or wit. This is the sort of humor that we find in wordplay and quick exchanges.

Venus represents humor in or from art. This is what we see in the movies and in those witty political cartoons.

Jupiter represents humor in or from a more hopeful or optimistic outlook, like the ability to make light of the bad or find hope in it. We could also see this as a more philosophical sort of humor.

And the Moon we could see as representing the emotional aspect of humor. Humor does draw an emotional response - happiness, hopefully - so this makes sense.

Comedy, specifically, is ruled by Venus. So the strictly artistic or “professional” side of humor and expressing humor.

You can really tell what people find funny through the placements of these heavenly bodies and their aspects.

I think there’s a tendency to only see certain signs as comedic or humorous but really every sign has a sense of humor, it just varies by type. Capricorn, for example, definitely has a dry sense of humor, and Aries a physical sense of humor - the type that inspires a person to act out something to make others laugh.

I've never seen a post being more accurate than this one about my rising before, absolutely incredible 💜♍

Hi. Can you do virgo rising culture. Thank you

yes but only because I'm nice lol I actually don't know a lot of virgo risings :D but based on my logic, here are my... interpretations(?) :

VIRGO RISING CULTURE♍

-not necessarily smiling at strangers but being nice

-having a stern look but really kind tho

-PREPPY. preppy preppy preppy

-your clotjesb are always neat and clean and I feel being judged by you ugh

-PROPER PUNCTUATION!!! no grammar mistakes found

-the ceo voice lol

-a m b i t i o n, but not for a very long period of time lol

-hair so goooood

-I WANNA THANK YOU FOR ALWAYS HELPING PEOPLE AROUND WE ARE DOOMED TO FAIL WITHOUT YOU

-good at noticing details

-bookworms!!! mostly reading novels and articles

-would make a really good journalist ngl

-you probably have a notebook collection lol

-ANALYTICAL AF and SUPER DUPER SMART AND WITTY you are like the SECRET CLASS CLOWN

-skinny legend even if you eat a lot

-on an ongoing battle with aNxiETy

-nervous physical energy babEy, usually fidgeting

MOON IN GEMINI

“the power of youth is on my mind”

social butterfly, curious, witty.

Astrology Observations: Gemini Moons

Gemini moon people, just know that I love y’all and I hope you’re not slowly being driven into insanity from the lack of mental stimulation due to quarantine. ANYWAY. ENJOY LMAO.

☁️ Lighthearted

No matter how heavy the rest of their chart is, these people are lighthearted. While they definitely do have traumatic or painful experiences just like everyone else does, they don’t like to take anything too seriously, and aren’t likely to dwell on darkness or negativity. This can make them seem naive or childish, but they’re really far from it. They aren’t ignorant to the harsh realities of the world; they just choose to rise above it.

☁️ Sociable and witty

These are the people in your social circle that always have some wisecrack remark to make, or can easily lighten an otherwise dark and heavy mood.  They often make others laugh by making jokes about observations they’ve made about the environment that no one else probably noticed.

☁️ Street smart

Their playful and childlike nature may lead you to think otherwise, but Gemini moons are actually very aware of the world around them and deeply perceptive, making them adept at reading situations and acting accordingly.

☁️ Curious by nature

Gemini moon people can be labelled “superficial” by others because nothing seems to hold their interest. 

☁️ Easygoing

Gemini moons don’t tend to argue about anything. They’re similar to their sister sign, Sagittarius, in the sense that they’re both open-minded and nonjudgmental when listening to other people’s side of an argument. This makes other people feel at ease around them in social settings.

☁️ Can be two-faced

This is a commonality with all Gemini placements, but Gemini moon people are the most deeply two-faced out of all the others (sorry, lunar Geminis, lmao). This is due to their inclination toward intellectualism and attraction toward novelty, even in the realm of feelings. This combined with their naturally changeable nature, thanks to the mutable quality of Gemini, can cause outside parties to see them as inconsistent or “flaky” if they don’t understand the Gemini moon person’s line of reasoning.

☁️ Love feeling validated through words

A Gemini moon’s love language is probably words of affirmation (more likely to give than receive, though, which is fine by them). The blend of the air qualities of Gemini being in the emotional realm of the moon creates a person who is strongly affected by uplifting words and feel nourished by comforting words.

☁️ Nervous/anxious

Gemini moon people crave mental stimulation, and if whatever’s going on around them isn’t able to provide that for them, they can be visibly uncomfortable. From the outside looking in, they can appear anxious. But these people truly are just looking around, simply waiting for something to pique their interest.

Aaaand that’s a wrap on Gemini moons! As a Sag moon, you guys really have a special place in my heart and I don’t think you guys are appreciated enough. Stay tuned for the Cancer Moon post!

I feel personnaly attacked lmao 😂💕

gemini moon things

🎨 keen and liberal

🎨 quick witted and innovative

🎨 mother may have been someone who encouraged education and put a lot of emphasis on reading and learning etc

🎨 first instinct is to be distant and think things through OR to have offhand comments thrown at their opponent

🎨 can easily change from being open and friendly to aloof and cold

🎨 versatile and can socialise with anyone. Always has a witty and crafty comeback

🎨 magnanimous and friendly, doesn’t want to leave anyone out

🎨 prone to overthinking and can suffer from anxious thoughts more than most

🎨 has the skill of looking at their emotions from a detached point of view

🎨 impatient and has the mind of a Ferrari

🎨 prone to mood swings and can become disruptive when bored. Being bored can be the worst feeling for these people. However, if they’re bored they can become ether extravagant and unruly or energetic and spontaneous

🎨 bored easily and likes to change the topic of conversation easily

🎨 Intelligent and inquisitive, they need to give themselves more credit

🎨 has to feel and acknowledge their feelings, instead of denying how they feel and covering it up with humour and distractions

Early Sunday Morning - Adam Stanheight / Reader

It was Sunday, about six forty-five in the morning, the last day of the week. Thoughts and anxieties had woken you up. You floundered in the bed sheets futilely but couldn’t fall asleep again. You threw the covers off yourself, and flung your legs over the edge of the bed. The atmosphere was quiet and dull. A white light filtered through the big bedroom windows, the blinds folded shut. It was a chilly morning and you shivered as you got to your feet. It was cloudy outside, and the sun was just barely emerging from behind the large city buildings. You went to fix the blankets you messed up on the bed, and noticed Adam sleeping on the other side. You did not want to wake him so you gently brought the covers over your pillow. Adam rolled over, but didn’t open his eyes. Now he was facing you, his skin looking pale in the white light, and his whole expression peaceful and vulnerable. You heard the clock chime from the kitchen, and you glanced briefly in its direction. Adam twisted a little bit and you looked back at him. He was still fast asleep.

You turned away from the bed and padded into the bathroom. It was colder in here than it was in your bedroom. You stumbled to the bathtub and clumsily turned on the shower, you grabbed a clean towel from the cabinet, then waited for the water to warm. The remnants of your dream still haunted you a bit, but you proceeded to undress yourself, then stepped into the tub.

Hot water splashed on your face and rolled down your back. It soothed you and washed away all the horrors that still lurked in your mind from the night before. You let out a breath of relief, and leaned against the shower wall. You let your hair hang down in the water. It was so hot it burned you, but you liked it. ‘Scorching’ was better than just ‘hot’. The water relaxed your muscles, calmed your nerves, and allowed you to think clearly. The steam wafted up and warmed your face, it fogged the mirrors and the windows.

In your moment of bliss you missed the creak that came from the bathroom door, and the light swish of the shower curtain being pulled back. Someone came inside with you, and started bringing their hands up your back. You leaned into them, turning your head slightly to the left. “Adam…” you murmured.

“Morning…” Adam answered calmly in your ear.

“I didn’t mean to wake you, Adam,” you breathed out.

Adam leaned down and kissed you on the lips. He pulled you even closer to him and wrapped his hands around your waist. “It’s okay.” His warm breath passed over your lips. You put your head on his shoulder, and let the water roll over you.

Adam spun you around delicately so that you were facing him. He took in all your little details, and scanned your body up and down. You stared at him hesitantly, yet playfully, and waited for him to say something. “Like what you see?” You asked him wittily.

Adam raised an intrigued eyebrow at you. “Oh, definitely.” He pushed you against the wall, moving his head in close to yours. Your lips were nearly touching at this point, and you hummed out happily. “You look good,” he whispered.

“Oh, I’m sure. Doesn’t everyone think their significant other looks good without any clothes on?”

“I’ve seen other people without their clothes on,” Adam said simply. “And none of them compare to the beautiful sight in front of me right now.”

You scoffed. “You’re such a charmer.”

“I don’t know about that. You must be pretty good yourself, if you ended up in my dream last night.”

“Oh? What was I doing?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know?”

“I mean of course not, that’s why I asked. Because I didn’t want to know about your dream at all, so I asked about it,” you mumbled sarcastically.

Adam’s gaze flashed down to your mouth momentarily then came back up to yours. He narrowed his eyes at you flirtatiously, a small smile on his face. “You look rather kissable right now.”

You shrugged. “Well, I’m here aren’t I? Or would you prefer to wait a little longer?”

“Don’t play the Top game with me, Y/N.”

You smirked at him. “Why not, baby? You’ve been playing the Sub game ever since we started dating.”

Adam scowled at you. “I’ve gotten better.”

“You’ve gotten CONFIDENT. Being ‘confident’ and being ‘dominant’ are not the same thing.”

Adam eyed you miserably, knowing full-well that he had lost the argument. Knowing full-well that you were RIGHT.

“Are you going to kiss me?” You asked him finally. Adam’s mouth was only inches away from yours now, the close proximity was driving you mad. But Adam didn’t oblige. Instead, you asked again, “What happened in your dream, Adam?”

Adam looked at you halfheartedly, then struggled to say, “You… being dominant… Like usual.”

You rolled your head onto the wall, and looked at Adam from the side. “I’ll let you do it this time, then. You were right about one thing, you have gotten better at it.”

Adam grit his teeth. “Hardly. I learned from a professional.” He winked at you.

“If you won’t kiss me, I’ll kiss you,” you whispered firmly.

Adam stared at you. “Go ahead.”

Eagerly, you closed the gap between his mouth and yours, and started intensely making out. There was no lead up, no preparation, nothing. Just immediately to the point without any dilly-dallying.

Adam was kissing you hard, pressing into you, strongly pinning you to the wall. His hands left your waist and started rubbing your cheeks. There was no room between you and him. You were practically being squashed in between your boyfriend and your shower wall. But you liked it - a lot.

There was heat corrupting your face, steam clogging your nose and eyes, water drowning your skin, and butterflies flying in your stomach. You felt incredibly elated, your mind was numb. Adam’s lips on yours was such a miraculous feeling; it left a tingling in your lips and a rush of jubilation entering your brain. Maybe Adam was the submissive one, but he was a helluva good kisser. You couldn’t get enough of him.

You were out of breath by the time either of you stopped. Your lungs felt like they were burning, but everything else was high on adrenaline. You and your boyfriend stared into each other’s eyes deeply, both of you panting heavily into the other’s mouth.

After a couple seconds of winding down, Adam said, “Love you, Y/N.”

Your heart fluttered at his words. It made you feel good to hear him say that. You looked up at him, lacing your fingers in with his. “Love you, too.”

Adam reached for the shampoo on the shelf, keeping his eyes fixed on you, and then started to message your head. You gritted your teeth and fell against Adam’s chest, letting out a contented sigh. His skin was warm and soft. You closed your eyes and enjoyed feeling Adam’s firm hands on your scalp. He tenderly rocked your head into the stream of running water, making sure not to get any on your face. Scorching water trickled down your forehead and shoulders, and dripped from your hair.

When the shampoo was completely out of your hair, he backed away. You felt obliged to give him the same treatment, so you slathered some shampoo on your hands and combed your fingers through his hair. Adam smiled at you contentedly. “Hi…” he commented shyly.

“Hi,” you said sweetly, and pushed his head on to your shoulder. You felt Adam breathe out in satisfaction. You smiled, enjoying this way too much. Feeling Adam leaning on you for support was… honestly kind of hot… Then again, everything Adam did was… ‘honestly kind of hot’. He was so perfect.

A couple of minutes passed as you both finished bathing each other. This shower was probably the most efficient one you’d taken in your life; it had definitely felt good. Now that the water was off, you stared at the curtain dishearteningly. Neither of you wanted to get out into the cold. “Want to grab my towel?” You asked Adam hopefully. You batted your eyelashes at him in a joking manner, though you were slightly hoping it would work.

“No,” Adam said bluntly. “You want to get mine?”

“No.”

It was silent after that. Kissing broke out between you again, but only for a short moment. Then your phone rang. You looked back at the curtain. “You should do it,” you said playfully. “I’m too tired! I woke up before you did!”

Adam gave you a disapproving look. “Even I know that’s not true. Why don’t YOU get MY towel?”

“I’m not freezing my ass off for you.”

“I guess I won’t come to you when I’m stuck in a blizzard then,” Adam muttered dryly. “That’s good news, thank you.”

You elbowed him in the ribs. “Knock it off! I didn’t mean it.”

“Then go out there and grab a towel.”

“Look, it’s not my fault you didn’t bring one over.”

“You didn’t either,” Adam retorted.

“Well, at least I got mine OUT,” you replied smartly.

Adam pushed you through the curtain. “Get out of here.”

You fell down in a pile of hands and feet onto the linoleum bathroom floor, but not before grasping Adam’s hand in your own, and bringing him tumbling out with you. You were sprawled halfway out of the bathtub on your stomach. Adam was also halfway out of the tub, laying on his stomach.

You let out a yelp of surprise, and Adam let out an exclamation of disgust. But you yourself were proud.

Epic plan gone wrong… You thought to yourself complacently.

“If I go, you go, baby. That’s how it works,” you told Adam smoothly.

Adam gasped, then seemed to find his positioning on top of you quite pleasing, and leaned his mouth to your ear. “Of course,” he purred seductively. “I wouldn’t have it any other way. You know I’d never leave you to suffer all alone.” You felt his warm breath travel down your cheek. It made you giddy.

You chuckled nervously. “A-Adam…”

“What’s that you said about being the top?”

You huffed. “I didn’t say that. Did I say that? Hmmm, strange things happen to the bottoms, don’t they?”

“Right. Like their conceited personalities.”

“Don’t get cocky,” you said in a low tone.

Adam got up. “I’m fucking cold. Thanks, Y/N.”

You shrugged. “You felt warm to me.”

Adam chucked your towel at you. “Happy?”

You started drying your hair. “Yes…” you mumbled cheerily.

Adam shook his head in disbelief, and sat next to you on the floor. He was also tussling his hair with a towel, but he didn’t need to; it was too short for that. You beamed at him, feeling the close proximity eating you alive.

Once both of you had hung up your towels, Adam pulled you into a tight embrace, in which he started leaving little kisses down your cheeks and jaws. You squirmed in his grasp, a big smile on your lips and also a bright blush on your cheeks. You both laughed a little, and then you tried to pry Adam away. “Stop!” You gasped.

“Why so eager to leave me? Do you have to be somewhere? Are you seeing someone else?” Adam shot you a look full of fake hurt. “How could you?”

“No, no, no, no, no!” You blurted desperately. “It’s not like that! I don’t want to leave YOU, I want to leave this cold bathroom!”

Adam released you, a smug smile on his face. “Okay. I can deal with that. It’s very cold in here.”

You made a beeline for the dresser in the room over. You flung open the drawers, and pulled out your favorite things to where - preferably the most comfortable. You saw Adam come up beside you and pull out a white shirt, and a pair of jeans.

What else did he wear? The plaid flannel that was on the edge of the bed? Sadly, you were right. You mocked him for it, but Adam laughed with you.

“I know what works baby, why would I find something else to buy when I know that white T-shirts and jeans are comfortable?”

You sighed, and laid on the bed, your face towards the ceiling, when your stomach decided it was time to eat something. It announced it very loudly, and embarrassingly. Adam cast you an astonished look. “Hungry?”

You scrunched your nose at him indignantly. “Maybe I’m a little hungry?”

“You want leftovers?” Adam wondered worriedly.

You glanced at him nervously. “Yeah…” You murmured.

There weren't enough leftovers for two people. You both knew this and scrambled to your feet, racing for the door, each of you trying to be faster and smarter than the other. In a laughing fit, you and Adam made it to the fridge at the same time, therefore declaring it a tie and resolutely forcing both of you to split the meal in half. At the end of it all though, you ended up having to make waffles to satisfy the remaining hunger.

Oh what a morning. Today was going to be great! You couldn’t wait for next week.