Angst And Pain - Tumblr Posts
”Do you love her?”
“No!” His answer was immediate, wanting to - no, needing to ensure you that he does love you, and only you. “I don’t. I don’t love her, I love you. Okey? I love you so so so much. Only you. Always you.”
He was kneeling on the floor. Face buried in your stomach, calloused fingers grabbing at the thin fabric of your shirt in a desperate attempt to make you stay.
You thought if you knew that he didn’t really love her, that he still had some love left for you, you would feel better. That then you would maybe be able to forgive him for what he had done. But no. It only made it worse
“Then why?” your voice was barley above a whisper and all he could think about was how you sounded so small, so fragile, so tired.
“Why?” He asked, although he already knew what you were asking him.
“Then why did you do it? Why did you risk everything we had for one night with someone you don’t even care about, someone you don’t even know?” You were shouting now, tears streaming down your already tear stained face.
“I don’t know!” he yelled back. “I was stupid, and I made a stupid mistake and I am so fucking sorry!” he sobbed, hands shaking violently.
“Please just tell me what to do to fix this and I’ll do it”
And for a moment you actually thought about it. What could he do? What could he possibly do to make up for the ungodly thing he did?
“Nothing” your voice hardly above audible, but he heard you. And his heart completely broke.
Because it’s when he eventually lifts his head up from your shirt, and he meets your empty, cold eyes staring out into nothing, that he ultimately realizes that he’s lost you.
”I dont care that you regret it! I don’t care that you’re sorry! I don’t care that it was a mistake! All I care about is that you did it,”
“All I care about is that you fucked her in our room. In our bed, where just hours before you promised me to love me forever,”
He stayed silent. He didn’t know what to say. What could he say? All he could do was stand there, watching as she was falling apart right in front of him.
All while he did nothing, because what was there to do? He fucked up and he knew it.
So he says nothing. He stays silent even as she walks out the door, leaving him all alone once again.
UneXpect - Silence_011010701