Clone Commander Fox - Tumblr Posts
read between the lines
Fox x F!Reader
word count: 8.1k
description: the library is your favourite place to escape to when the galaxy gets too loud, and it just so happens to be the same for a certain marshal commander
warnings: sfw, fox being anxious & being frustrated about it, nervous (kinda non-sensical) ramblings from fox's pov incl. self-deprecating comments (basically projecting my anxiety onto him oops), but it ends cute and nerdy :)
a/n: really wanted to write a fox fic after seeing this post by @welcometo79s about fox being an introvert - I thought the idea was super interesting so here we have an anxious lil fox :) I could yap so much more but my notes are always too long so I'm gonna shut up
Going to the library was one of your favourite pastimes. Especially on a planet like Coruscant, which never seemed to slow down.
You had discovered this little corner of the planet years ago, and you spent more time here than you cared to admit. There were a number of libraries of Coruscant, but none of them as quiet and authentic as this one. You had truly struck gold in finding it, entirely by accident.
The feel of a real book, the feel of flimsi between your fingers, was an experience you relished in this technological day and age. You didn't have anything against technology, it was an integral part of your life and job after all, but holding something so precious and unique in your hands was something else entirely.
This particular library was not very large, though boasted an impressive catalogue of titles nonetheless. You loved curling up by the heater on cold evenings, in one specific cosy red armchair. It was a little more hidden, a reading nook of sorts, and it made the experience feel all the more special. Just you and a book, the outside world, the war, slipping from your mind easily.
In the last few weeks, there was a new regular that had started coming. At first, you were alarmed, his bright red armour alerting you to the fact that he belonged to the Coruscant Guard, but when he picked up a book and settled himself in a window seat, you had relaxed.
You had to admit, you found yourself watching him quite a lot. After a number of times seeing him, you had figured out exactly who he was. It was entirely surprising to you that the Commander of the Coruscant Guard frequented such a place, though he always walked in as if it was exactly where he should be, so you came to respect that.
Going to the library had become part of your daily routine, spending your evenings there as it was much quieter than spending them in your apartment. The people you lived with were particularly loud, not to mention the noise of the city outside the window. However, in the weeks that Commander Fox had begun to do the same thing, you found your reason for going shifting.
You couldn't help but be intrigued by him. You were always too far away to see what he was reading, and he never took his helmet off. You wondered how he could read through it, but you presumed that if it had been made for battle then a book probably wouldn't be a problem.
One day, as he was leaving, you noticed him acting a little odd. He peered around to see if anyone was looking his way, not noticing you at all, and then he pocketed a stylus that the person who sat there before him had left. You smirked, watching him leave the library with a little extra hurriedness to his steps. After that, you decided that you needed to know what it was he was reading all this time, your intrigue finally becoming strong enough.
When you entered the library the next day, he was already sat in his regular seat, one leg stretched out on the seat and the other foot planted on the ground. He held the book in one hand, the other absentmindedly playing with the stylus that he had stolen the previous day. You found the book you had been reading, and made your way towards his position, your stomach turning just a little.
The window bay that he sat in was reasonably large, with a wooden frame and covered with pillows. You made your way to the opposite side from him and took your seat. His head raised from his book quickly in surprise, and you offered him a smile, before opening up your book and finding where you had left it.
Unbeknownst to you, and contrary to your own thoughts, Fox had noticed you. It was hard not to; you were here everyday, and he found you to be distracting, to say the least. He had often watched you sneaking glances at him, the secrecy afforded by his helmet allowing his cheeks to heat up without detection. It was the reason he rarely took his helmet off really, he didn't want anybody to he able to read him, he had a hard enough time conveying his thoughts through words without people watching him try to do it.
Fox had always been somewhat of an introvert, a stark contrast to his brothers. He didn't know how he had ended up not sharing in his brothers’ natural outgoing demeanour, but it was something that affected him constantly. He managed to have a commanding presence and confidence in his work through his rigorous training on Kamino, and he now had enough experience in his role that it felt safe, natural. Though at the end of a long day, when his brothers went out to 79s, he much preferred to be by himself. He craved so deeply to have his own space, and finding this library recently had afforded him some semblance of that.
Fox drew his knee up towards his chest so that he wasn't invading any of your personal space, despite the feeling that that was exactly what you had just done to him. He watched you from behind his visor, intrigued and confused. You didn't look up from your book once, leafing through the pages gradually as you took in the information on them. You were reading something non-fiction, something to do with theories about wild space and beyond. Somehow that surprised Fox - he didn't know what he expected you to be reading but it wasn't that. After his heart had stopped racing at the thought of having to talk to someone, he let his eyes drift back to his own book.
For the entirety of the evening, you didn't talk to Fox, nor did you so much as look at him. He found it to be equally relieving and maddening. He was glad that you both seemed to just be enjoying each other's presence without the need for conversation, but he couldn't understand why you had joined him.
He knew his armour made him stand out among the civilians, and usually people seemed to be scared of him because of it, as if he would arrest them for looking at him the wrong way. It was a blessing and a curse. People left him alone, but he stood out nonetheless. He got what he wanted, but was constantly being perceived in ways he didn't know as he did.
He wondered what your angle was.
When he had seen you watching him, he had initially thought it was for the same reason: that you were scared of him. However, he soon realised that you looked at him with no contempt, no ill-will, and now that you had come and sat yourself within his presence, he was even more interested to know what was going on in your head.
After a number of hours - he had lost count how many - he noticed you rising from your seat. You placed down the cushion that you had set in your lap as you read, and cast a glance over to him. With how he had rested his book in his lap and looked up, it was obvious he was looking at you, and you gave him another sweet smile.
He was overtaken by the need to speak with you. Your kind gestures seemed to be an obvious response to the way he was acting, and that you were respecting the fact that he didn't want to talk. Unfortunately, before he could work up the courage, you had gone back over to the bookshelf and put the book back in its place, leaving shortly thereafter.
Fox sighed audibly, and it came out as a small hiss through the filter of his helmet. Despite liking his own space, he had enjoyed having someone else with him, just sitting in silence while you both focused on your own things. He didn't have that kind of interaction with any of his brothers, they were often far too excitable for him.
He loved his brothers dearly, they meant a lot to him, but being around them all of the time tired him out, and sometimes it was nice to get away from them. He found himself thinking that perhaps he didn't always have to do it by himself. Perhaps it was possible to spend time with someone who didn't drain his energy. Someone like you.
When Fox arrived at the library the next day, you were already there, sat in your regular seat. He watched you for a moment, the corners of your lips lifting as you read something from your book. You looked so kind, so approachable. He didn’t feel as though you were trying to draw him in in any particular way, at least not in a way that would ordinarily have him feeling flustered. It didn't seem that you sought anything that would draw him out of his comfort zone at all. With that in mind, he just truly felt like indulging in your simple company once more, and so he did.
He approached the corner of the library where you were slightly hidden away, and he settled himself in the armchair opposite you. You looked up to watch him do so, and smiled warmly when his visor turned towards you. The crinkles at the edges of your eyes gave away how pleased you were that he had decided to join you, and he relaxed a little, his body moulding into the chair as he opened up his book.
As you had the previous day, you both engrossed yourselves in your books. The worries of today and tomorrow washed away and you just soaked up the words on the page. You were curled up in your chair, a cushion held to your stomach as you often did, whereas Fox had his legs outstretched, one over the other, his hand tucked under his arm as the other held his book. You were both just comfortable.
As the day wound to a close, you flicked your eyes to the clock, and thought that you best be getting home.
Fox watched you raise from your seat, placing the cushion back onto it neatly. His stomach lurched a little, once again feeling the urge to speak to you. He felt exceedingly stupid as he couldn't bring himself to do it, and he was floundering for something, anything to say.
“Wait!” He heard himself say, a little louder than he would've liked, especially for in a library. You turned back to him, your eyes finding his visor as you waited for him to continue.
Fox's brain drew a blank. He couldn't think let alone speak right now. However, you just gave him a patient smile, not expecting anything. It calmed his mind enough to ask a simple question.
“What's your name?”
Your smile grew a little before you replied, you voice even more kindly than he could have imagined - soft, yet assured. He couldn't help but let the corner of his mouth raise a little under his helmet. After a moment, he realised that you weren't asking his name, and his smile dropped, slightly panicking for something to say again. He would've given anything to be as outgoing as his brothers at this very moment, or any subsequent one.
“Well” You cleared your throat as he just looked up at you, and a small smirk wound its way onto your face. “I suppose I'll see you around, Commander Fox” You gave him a little mock salute as you turned away.
Fox could feel his cheeks burning, his mind now in overdrive. You knew who he was the whole time? Somehow he felt especially embarrassed more than anything, and slumped back into his chair with a huff. What was he supposed to say to you now? How much did you know about him? If you knew who he was, why did you sit with him? And why didn't you say anything?
Endless questions swirled around in his head, stopping him from enjoying his book for the rest of the evening. Even as he tried to sleep in his bunk, all he could do was stare up at the ceiling, his cheeks still burning as he thought of how stupid he must've sounded asking your name and sitting by you, when you knew exactly who he was.
He desperately wanted to know what you thought of him. Surely if you knew his name then you'd know other things about him? But what did you know? Had you heard that he was somewhat removed or lonely and thought he could use a friend? Because that would be positively mortifying.
Fox ran a hand over his face. He shouldn't be thinking like this. For all that he avoided them, he cared far too much what people thought of him. He wished he could stop doing that.
Fox had thought about not going to the library the next day, but after a long talk with himself in the mirror, he decided that it didn't matter what you thought of him, and he wasn't going to let it ruin what he had come to know as his little corner of the galaxy.
He was already there when you arrived, as you had come a bit later than usual. That had only struck Fox with an unpleasant feeling in his gut, but he wasn't going to let on.
You slowly approached his window seat with your book tucked in your hands. His head didn’t raise until you spoke.
“Is it alright if I sit with you?”
Fox's head snapped up at the sound of your voice, his eyes a little wide behind his visor. He elected not to speak, and instead nodded his head and gestured vaguely to the other side of the window.
Unlike the last couple of days, Fox was positively unfocused on his book. It was maddening, all he wanted to do was relax, especially after his sleepless night and the stack of flimsiwork that had awaited him on his desk this morning. He couldn't be so lucky, you had to go and distract him. Of course it wasn't your fault, and Fox knew that, he was just annoyed that he couldn't shut his mind off for once second. Ever.
After around 45 minutes had passed, and Fox had finally settled into reading his book, he noticed you watching him, and he internally groaned. He had just started relaxing.
He raised his head to let you know he saw you looking at him, and you smiled warmly before speaking.
“Can I ask you a question?”
That made him nervous, the slight anticipation making his head nod quickly to release it.
“Is your helmet comfortable?” You asked, resting your book in your lap.
Whatever he thought you were going to ask, it wasn't that.
“Uh… yeah, it's fine” He replied awkwardly.
“Cool” You nodded, seemingly satisfied with the answer, and opened your book back up.
Fox just stared at you. Was there not any other reason for you asking that? Did you actually just want to know if his helmet was comfortable or not? Why couldn't he stop questioning your motivation for doing anything?
“How do you know my name?” He asked, getting straight to the point.
Your expression was sheepish when you looked back up at him again, and you fumbled slightly with your book, losing your page. You let out a small huff at that, “I don't know, I think everyone kind of knows who you are”
That was probably the worst reason you could have given. Fox cringed, his body folding in on itself fractionally even though he tried to stay rigid and strong.
He looked back down to his book and tried to read, but now it just felt like the awkward silence was swallowing him whole. He couldn't focus on the page, his mind swirling with various words that he tried to string together to reply to what you had said.
After a few minutes of that, Fox was fed up. He practically slammed his book closed and strutted over to the desk to return it, not looking back as he left.
The next night, you were still put out by the Commanders actions. You went to the library anyway, convinced that he probably wouldn't be going, that you had well and truly scared him off. You didn't know exactly why, or rather how, you had done it, but you could tell he'd been frustrated by it. You hadn't hardly said anything to him, but you supposed that you had managed to offend him in those few short words.
Thankfully, it soon slipped from your mind as you curled your legs into your chest and dove into the new book you had picked up today.
If Fox had been embarrassed by you knowing who he was, he was positively beside himself with mortification now. He had blocked it out the entire day, holing up in his ‘office’ and burying himself in his flimsiwork so he couldn't possibly let another thought into his head.
As it got to the end of the day, Fox couldn't stop watching the clock. Time was creeping along at a painfully slow pace, and that was as he was already staying late. It felt like torture, working late just to stop himself thinking. His brain was at maximum capacity, and all he wanted to do was rest.
“Commander” A voice called out, and Fox's head lifted slowly to see Thorn standing in front of his desk, “Maker, you look rough”
Fox scowled, “I thought I told you to knock”
“I vaguely remember you saying that…” Thorn said, a mocking grin growing with each word. “You do know this isn’t a door right?” He said, knocking on the wall that only vaguely separated Fox’s desk from the others.
Fox just rolled his eyes, “What do you want?”
“We're clocking out now, you fancy coming to 79s?” Thorn asked hopefully.
“You already know the answer” Fox looked down at his flimsiwork again.
Thorn huffed, “Come on vod, just this once?”
“I've got work to do” Fox replied.
“That's what you always say”
Fox gave Thorn a tired look, “Another time”
“You always say that as well” Thorn remarked.
Fox sighed aggressively, “Look, I'm really not in the mood for this tonight”
“Alright, alright” Thorn put his hands up in surrender, “I'll get you next time”
“I doubt it” Fox mumbled under his breath as his brother left.
He picked up his stylus. It was the one he had stolen from the library, or more accurately, whoever had left it at the library. He let a sigh escape him. It was filled with mixed emotions, positive memories of the library tinged by his own stupidity.
He twirled the stylus in his hand, manoeuvring it through his fingers. Maybe it wouldn't be the end of the world to go to the library, to seek the respite he so desperately desired. If you were there, he could just ignore you, it couldn't be that hard.
Once that thought had entered his mind and he'd let it grow for just a second, he rose to his feet, grabbing his helmet from the edge of his desk. When he stepped out of his corner, the chattering voices he could hear stopped, and the two remaining clones in the office looked towards him.
“Ah, Commander, you decided to join us after all” Thorn grinned.
“Uh, no. I’m going out” Fox replied, continuing to walk towards the door.
“Where to?” Stone asked, pushing himself from his desk.
“Just- out” Fox replied, much more rigidly than he would've liked. It sounded extremely suspicious coming out.
“Out? Like on a date?” Thorn asked.
“No!” Fox barked back, almost stopping in his place.
“Oh my god, you are” Stone’s expression turned to a broad grin as he dashed towards the door, stopping his brother from leaving.
“I'm not” Fox insisted, a sharp glare directed at Stone.
“You're blushing” He pointed out, which only intensified Fox’s glare. Stone pushed his brother's shoulder lovingly, “Aw vod, I'm so happy for you”
Fox rolled his eyes, pushing past his brother and grumbling to himself as he could hear the two of them laughing at his expense. He loved his brothers, but they really got on his last nerve sometimes.
When he got to the library, it was much later than he usually arrived, which the librarian commented on as he checked out his book. He just gave her a polite nod, not really pleased at his patterns being recognised.
He had planned to just ignore you, but when he saw you sitting in your usual seat, curled up and peaceful, reading your book as if you were the only two things in the galaxy, he couldn't help but feel drawn to you once more. He walked over to you in a few long strides, and cleared his throat. Your head shot up, eyes a little wide.
“Commander” You said, a little unsurely as it wasn't entirely clear if he wasn't upset with you or not. You couldn't tell from under the helmet.
“Please don't call me that” He replied in a somewhat affronted tone, though he must have seen how taken aback you were because he instantly backtracked, “I mean- No, just- Fox is fine, please”
“Okay then” You smiled, “Hi Fox”
Fox returned the smile, even though you couldn’t see it, “May I join you?”
You nodded, gesturing to the armchair opposite you. Fox sat down, leaning forward and clearly not finished speaking.
“I am… sorry, for leaving abruptly yesterday”
You couldn't stop your face from twitching with amusement, “You don't have to be sorry”
“Right… yeah” His hand snaked to the back of his neck on instinct as he spoke awkwardly.
“I do hope I didn't offend you though” You added, drawing your eyebrows together.
“Offend me?” Fox seemed genuinely confused.
“About… knowing who you are” You jogged his memory.
“Oh, no” Fox shook his head lightly. It had sent him spiralling, but you didn't need to know that.
“Good” You smiled sweetly and flicked your eyes back down to your book.
Fox watched you for a moment longer then opened his book, finding his place and continuing on.
What he liked the most about you, not that he knew much else, was that you seemed content just being in each other's space, and not needing to talk to fill the time. Talking wasn't his strong suit, it stressed him out at the best of times, even when he pretended it didn't. Particularly then, in fact. Somehow, without even communicating with each other verbally, this was the most meaningful connection he had shared with someone new in a long time. He didn't know that you thought that way too, but somehow he felt that you did.
Not too long later, the librarian came to tell you both that the library would be closing soon. Fox nodded and stood from his seat, but paused in going to hand his book back in when he realised you weren't moving. You hadn't even looked up from your book.
“Aren't you coming?” He questioned, his voice clearly showing his confusion.
You looked up to him, your lips curling into a smile, “I'm not quite done here yet”
Fox frowned, then sat back down opposite you, his knees spread and elbows leant against them, a stance he often took when questioning someone.
“You'll be chucked out by the librarian” He stated.
You shook your head gently, “I can be sneaky”
“Then you'll be locked in” He tried to find reason in whatever idea you had up your sleeve.
“Eh” You shrugged, “I can pick the lock”
Fox tilted his head. Even though you couldn't see the confusion on his face, you still found the action a little cute.
“You realise I could have you arrested for that”
Fox could see your eyes flash with a small amount of alarm as you remembered exactly who was sitting in front of you, but it was gone as soon as it came, and instead you narrowed them a little.
“Well, that would be a little pointless” You said as if it were obvious.
Fox’s eyebrows raised instinctively, “And why is that?”
“Because you'd have to arrest yourself too” You stated, your eyes sparkling with mischief and a grin overtaking your face.
“Wha-”
Before he could even finish the word, you had jumped up and grabbed his arm, dragging him towards the rows of bookshelves and pulling him in between two of them.
He wanted to protest, but the words were stuck in his throat. He was once again thankful for the shield that was his helmet, because he knew that his cheeks must have been bright red with the way you were looking up at him. Your face bore the widest grin, your eyes crinkled at your own mischief, and he was hopeless to do anything about it now.
Fox’s head was telling him to leave, that breaking the law, something that he dedicated his life to upholding, was not a good idea. Though between your excitement and the secret thrill it was giving him, his heart was aching to stay. So he did.
He watched you as you glanced around and listened out for the librarian. Somehow the only thing in his mind was that if he rocked forwards onto the balls of his feet that he'd probably be touching you, or at least feel the heat of your body. The thought was disturbed when the lights cut out and the librarian could be heard walking nearby. You grabbed his arm again, tugging him down the shelves to hide against the other end.
You were grinning, resting your temple against the end of the shelves and looking up at him.
“Having fun?”
Fox just hummed in reply as he copied your posture, not giving much away. You rolled your eyes, but your smile remained, and you kept listening out for the librarian. Soon enough, the clunk of the outdated technology of lock and key slotting together rang out in the darkness of the library, and you stood up straight, walking back over to your regular spot.
By the time Fox caught up with you, you had turned on a nearby lamp and were already sat back in the chair with your book open. He just sat opposite you, watching you through his visor.
The library was usually quiet, but now it was dead silent, and Fox couldn't help but relish in that fact. Even the sounds of the city couldn't be heard in here. It was an entirely peaceful moment, something he rarely got the opportunity to indulge in.
Fox peered around the library, making sure nobody else was lingering after closing, and then hooked his thumbs under the base of his helmet, pulling it off with a quiet hiss. The noise made your head raise, seeming loud in the quiet environment.
It was hard not to stare. You knew more or less what he looked like, he was a clone after all, but nothing could have prepared you for actually seeing him. His dark curls, streaked by silver, his eyes a dark brown and his battle worn skin. He was gorgeous, so rugged yet so stately, and so unique in his appearance as compared to the brothers of his that you had met.
He noticed you examining his face and immediately went to put his helmet on.
“No!” You called out, a little more desperately than you hoped for. Fox gave you a weary and puzzled look, and you could have melted right there. It was strange to see the emotion on his face when he had always concealed it from you.
“Sorry” You coughed out, a little flustered, “I didn't mean to stare”
Despite your words, you continued to observe him, inspecting his face. Every mark, every scar, every feature drawing you in.
Fox tilted his head to the side a fraction, a small crease forming in his brow, “You're still staring”
“Right, sorry” You looked down to your book and scanned your eyes across the page, trying to find where you had been when you got distracted by the sheer beauty of the man before you. It certainly wasn't helpful to think of it in those terms when you were trying not to look at him.
Fox let one side of his mouth quirk up at your reaction to him. He hadn't really expected you to care all that much, but your darkened cheeks were telling him that perhaps you did. He spoke your name, and the sound of his voice unfiltered by his helmet sent a shiver running up your spine.
“Hm?” You replied, glancing up.
“How often do you stay after closing?”
“Oh, not that often” You shrugged a shoulder.
“Why tonight?” He pressed.
You hesitated, “Well, you didn't come until late, and… I feel like that was kinda my fault”
Fox couldn't help the way his stomach flipped, even if he didn't know exactly why it had. He placed his book down on the table next to him.
“It's not your fault” He asserted, “I had a lot of work to do”
It wasn't exactly a lie, but he wasn't going to tell you that he had been trying to banish you from his head all day.
“But thank you. It's not often that I get to-” He gestured his hand vaguely around the library, “Experience the quiet like this”
“No problem” You smiled, setting your book down as well. It seemed you both were now more interested in each other's company than that of the books you had chosen.
Fox bit the inside of his cheek, a little nervous under your undivided attention. The feeling in his stomach was akin to his usually anxiety around socialising, but it felt different, not entirely unpleasant.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Sure” You replied, “I'm an open book”
Fox let out a breathy chuckle, the amusement dancing in your eyes letting him know that your pun wasn't accidental.
“What do you do?”
“Like… for work?” You asked.
“Yeah, I guess” Fox shrugged. He didn’t really mind what you talked about, he just wanted to know more about you.
“Um” You looked away, flexing your hands nervously, “Nothing. I mean- you know, nothing interesting… or important”
Fox hummed, giving you a sceptical look, “Something tells me breaking into libraries in the middle of the night isn’t the only illegal thing you do”
“Okay, first of all - I don’t break in, I only break out-”
“Not much better really” Fox shrugged, trying to keep the smirk from his lips unsuccessfully.
”Sure, maybe not” You smirked, “But it’s hardly malicious. It’s nothing like, say… Stealing someone’s private property, such as a stylus or something like that…”
A blush dusted Fox’s cheeks immediately, now knowing you had indeed caught him doing exactly that. He cleared his throat, looking away and trying to find a way to explain himself.
“Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone” You teased, resting your hand on his knee for a second to draw his attention back to you, “Besides, who would I tell? We’ve already established that you’re not going to arrest yourself”
Fox dragged his gaze back to you, the gentle touch only making his cheeks burn hotter. He gave you a weary sort of look, but the edge of his lips curled upwards nonetheless.
“Why did you steal it?” You then asked, devoid of any of the teasing tone you had previously employed.
“Uh” Fox ran a hand through his hair, “Well… I don’t really have anything that’s… Mine”
You gave him a puzzled look, “How do you mean?”
Fox cleared his throat, “I mean… I don’t really have possessions, I share all of my time and my space with my brothers. I don’t have a place that is mine, to put anything that might be mine”
He paused for a moment, conscious that he may be oversharing, but your even gaze, the way you were sitting forward and listening attentively told him that perhaps you didn’t mind. That you were interested in what he was saying.
“I have an office, sort of, but not really. It’s just a tiny area in the corner of the Guard’s office, so it’s a little closed off, and it barely even fits my desk, but- anyway. I just take what I can get I suppose” He wrapped up his rambling.
“I can understand that”
“You can?” He asked.
You nodded, “Yeah, I’ve… never had a space to myself either really”
“You don’t have an apartment or something?” He tilted his head to the side.
“Not to myself. I live with three other people, and they’re very… loud. That’s why I come here”
“Yeah, same here I suppose” Fox smiled, then his face fell a little, “Hold on- We didn’t get to the bottom of what you do for work”
You chuckled a little nervously, “I’m a mechanic”
Fox gave you a dubious look, “That doesn’t sound illegal”
“It’s not” You sighed, “It’s just… my boss is a little dodgy”
Fox took a moment to shift in his seat, trying to appear casual, “What kind of dodgy? Who… is it?”
You just smirked at him, “You’re not getting it out of me that easily I’m afraid, Commander”
Fox wanted to chuckle, but he was also suddenly struck by the fact that he had no reason to believe you had any moral integrity or that you actually were any sort of good person.
“You don’t think they should be brought to justice?” He spoke with trepidation.
You smiled a little, “Yeah, I guess I do, but then I would be out of a job”
“You could get another one” Fox reasoned.
“It’s not that simple” You stated, “I don’t live with three people for the fun of it after all”
Fox was confused, you could see that much woven into the frown he gave you.
“I can’t afford anything else” You completed the thought, trying to sound as casual as possible.
“Oh, right” Fox replied.
Fox didn’t really know what to say. He hadn’t faced that kind of issue before in his own life, so he couldn’t say he fully understood. He wasn't shy of people turning to crime because of money, their were often few other reasons, though it certainly gave a new perspective to the way he looked at his role of what had turned into a short jump from policeman.
“Anyway” You said more cheerily, “It isn't such a bad job, I do get to spend my evenings here”
Fox smiled at that, “How long have you been coming here?”
“A few years” You replied.
It wasn't long before you were talking animatedly, sharing little details of your life with Fox. He could feel himself coming out of his shell the more you talked, enamoured by the way you spoke and the things you had to say. He found himself agreeing with many of the observations you made, even if he didn't say so. It was also hard to ignore how drawn to you he now felt, in a way he hadn't experienced with many others, possibly anyone. He told you details about himself too, a little bit about his brothers, about a book that he had heard of but couldn’t find, about what he does in the Coruscant Guard.
You were explaining a passage of your favourite book, and the way the light was hitting you face was making it hard for Fox to concentrate on your words fully.
“Do you think that was the right thing for them to do?” He asked, a crease in his brow to show his engagement.
“Well, no. Probably not, but that's what the book is questioning” You explained, then noted Fox's slightly dazed expression, “Maybe they should take a page out of your book and just start stealing” You raised your eyebrows a little, and Fox laughed defeatedly, both as his own habits and your terrible library humour.
“I can't believe you saw me do that and still came and sat with me” He joked, the outright sarcasm feeling unfamiliar on his tongue.
“Oh no, that was what made me do it” You admitted a little theatrically.
“Really?” He cocked his head to the side, giving you a genuine disbelieving look.
“Yeah, it interested me. I wanted to know what the Commander of the Coruscant Guard was doing stealing from a library” You chuckled, “It was just… not what I expected, I guess”
“What did you expect?” He asked with a teasing edge, “The armour does tend to give a certain impression”
“Oh no, I would never judge a book by its cover” You put your hand to your chest in mock offense, a smile still pulling at your lips.
He rolled his eyes, “Do you always have such terrible humour?”
“I think it's funny” You shrugged, covering your mouth as a yawn escaped it. You blinked a few times, and it was only then that you realised it was most likely very late. Checking your watch, you saw that it was past midnight and you sat forward in your chair, “I should be getting home really”
Fox was tired as well, but he wasn't ready to say goodbye just yet. Though, he didn't want to keep you if you were tired, and he wasn't exactly fully awake himself.
“Can I escort you back?” He suggested.
You smiled as you stood up, “Sure, that'd be nice”
Fox followed suit, grabbing his helmet, and letting you lead the way to the door, both of you returning your books to the shelf on the way.
“My very own Coruscant Guard escort, lucky me” You muttered, eyelids heavy with sleep as you looked up at him with a smirk.
Fox’s lips formed a similar expression. He rolled his eyes, though it wasn’t as spiteful as when he had directed it at his brother earlier on in the night. He had completely forgotten about the aspect of having to pick the lock, so was a little surprised when you then produced a small tool from your pocket and knelt down, slotting it into the keyhole.
“Should I be worried that you carry around a lock pick?” He asked, placing his helmet over his head.
You let out a breathy chuckle, “I only use it for this. Besides, it's just a regular tool, not specifically a lock pick”
The door cracked open, and you pulled the tool out, placing it back in your pocket.
It was only a few blocks to your home, and on the way you explained to Fox how you had first found the library on an evening stroll shortly after moving into your current apartment, trying to get away from your loud roommates.
You could already hear them as you approached now, music turned up loud and some form of excited squealing spilling from the windows. You cracked open the door, and winced as the noise became ten times louder. You gave Fox a sheepish expression and he chuckled a little.
“I can see why you go to the library” He noted.
“Yeah” You sighed, rubbing your neck, “They’re not so bad really, just…”
Fox nodded in understanding.
You both just stayed watching each other for a moment, neither one of you wanting to be the first to say goodbye. You stared into Fox's visor, hoping to find his eyes behind it, and by some miracle, he understood that, and took it off in one smooth motion.
You smiled up at him as his eyes emerged from beneath the mask, and his heart instinctively skipped a beat. With you looking up at him like that, and nothing to hide his own emotions, he suddenly felt exposed. His stomach erupted into what felt like his usual anxiety-ridden state, but for once, it was more exhilarating than it was scary.
“I'm glad I made you stay behind tonight” You admitted, little care for how odd the words sounded.
Fox chuckled slightly, “Yeah, me too”
There was another moment of silence, and now Fox read it as awkwardness, so he immediately began backing away.
“I- Um, I'll see you around?” He offered.
Your smile faltered for half a second before you replied, “Yeah, see you around”
Fox watched you get inside safely, and then turned on his heel to head back to his quarters.
The whole way back, and well into the night, Fox couldn't get you out of his head. Though, this time he didn't mind.
The following morning, Fox was once again buried in flimsiwork, already on his third caf and ready to pull his hair out.
“Commander” Fox heard the unmistakable voice from the ‘door’ of his office, and he could have easily groaned in frustration.
“I thought I told you to knock” He grumbled, not bothering to look up from his flimsiwork.
“Perhaps you did” Thorn shrugged, a grin evident in his voice, “But you have a visitor”
Fox's head snapped up at that.
“A visitor?”
“Mhm” Thorn confirmed in a somewhat teasing manner, “No idea how she got past security downstairs but, there's a woman asking to see you”
Fox frowned a little, but stood from his desk, walking over to look around the corner. He saw you leaning on Thorn's desk, looking around the office and a book clutched between your hands. You were in a mechanic’s jumpsuit, folded down to the waist with leather gloves tucked into the belt, and seemingly not caring one bit how your appearance made you stand out in the office.
He called your name, and your head turned towards him, along with everyone else in the office that had already been staring at the you, the person who didn't belong. Your eyes lit up a little as you saw him, and you pushed yourself from the desk, striding over to him and Thorn.
“What are you doing here?” He asked softly, leading you into his corner of the office.
“I wanted to g-”
“Actually, hold on one moment” Fox interrupted you, then walked back out into the office to find Thorn and Stone waiting just outside with their ears turned to the wall. Fox rolled his eyes and cleared his throat, making them jump away.
“Could I maybe have some privacy?” He gave them a pointed look.
Both of them mumbled a ‘yes sir’ as they slunk away, brandishing matching smirks. Fox huffed, before returning to you.
“Sorry about that” He ran a hand through his hair, “Are you alright? What are you doing here?”
“I'm fine” You smiled, “I came to give you this”
You held up the book in your hands, offering it to him. Fox eyed it suspiciously, his gaze flicking between you and the book.
“Did you steal this from the library?”
You laughed gratuitously, “No. I thought we established that was your thing”
“But…” Fox frowned, “Did you buy it then? You really shouldn’t have spent your money-”
“I didn’t buy it, it’s mine” You cut him off, “Well, it was mine, it’s yours now”
You tried to hand it to him but Fox just pushed it back towards you, taking a step forward, “I couldn’t possibly take your property”
“I want you to have it” You grabbed his hand and forced him to take it, looking up into his eyes intently.
Fox’s heart stuttered at your intense gaze, aware of how your hand still rested over his as you awaited his reply. He looked down at the book, and turned it over to read the spine. His eyes quickly found yours again, and a grin had bloomed on your face.
“This is it” He breathed out, “The book I was looking for”
“It is” You nodded, finally taking your hand away from his.
“Wh- How- I didn’t even know what it was called, how did you…?”
“I guess I can read between the lines” You shrugged, your grin widening, and Fox laughed, the edges of his eyes crinkling. “I’ve read it a few times” You admitted, then flipped the book open, revealing annotations in the margins, “I went through and pointed out my favourite parts, wrote a bit about why and kinda analysed it a little”
“You wrote these notes for me?” He questioned, his voice sounding unusually small as his brows pinched together.
“Yeah” You gave him a warm smile, “That way, it’s like… personalised for you”
Fox was at a loss for words. You had really listened to him yesterday, and heard how his lack of personal effects weighed on his mind, and now you were giving him something of yours, and you had made it personal to him. His chest spread with warmth, his shoulders relaxing in a small contented sigh.
He let the book fall to his side, and he leaned forwards onto the balls of his feet, so his chest was almost against yours. He brought his hand up and gently brushed your hair away from your forehead, his hand lingering against your cheekbone. Your eyes shone up at him, and a genuine smile crossed his face.
“I'm glad I met you” Fox murmured, his voice low so that only you could hear.
“I know you are” You grinned.
Fox rolled his eyes, “Let me guess, because you can read me so well”
You chuckled, your head tipping to the side in thought, “I hadn’t thought of that one actually. Looks like you’re picking up my novel sense of humour though”
Fox scoffed a laugh, “You’re terrible”
“Maybe” You shrugged, “But I like to think that maybe you don't mind”
Fox hummed, “Perhaps not”
You grinned up at him for a moment, and then stepped back, “I should be getting back really, I'm not supposed to be here”
“You don't have to tell me that” Fox raised his eyebrows at you, “How did you manage get up here?”
“A fun story for another time” You smirked, disappearing around the corner.
Fox followed after you, watching you leave from where he leant in the doorway, when you stopped in your place and turned back to him. You seemed to be weighing something in your head, and then evidently decided to go through with it, jogging back over to him.
Fox raised an eyebrow as you came to stand in front of him, “What is it?”
“I forgot something”
“Forgot wha-?”
Fox was interrupted by you raising onto your tiptoes and placing a delicate kiss to his cheek, your hand finding his to steady yourself. The feel of your hand gently holding his, let alone your lips on his cheek, was enough to set his skin alight. His cheeks were already burning by the time you pulled away.
You gave him a sweet smile, squeezing his hand lightly and speaking in a whisper, “See you later”
Fox watched you go with wide eyes, his body unable to move from where it was firmly rooted to the ground. Your body finally disappeared out of the office, and he let out a breath he didn’t realise that he’d been holding, his body relaxing.
“So you did have a date” Stone nudged his brother, a grin almost splitting his face. Fox just gave him a withering look.
“What did I say about privacy?”
“Well I figured that since you made it everyone business-”
“I suggest you get back to work, Stone”
“Yep. Got it”
Fox settled himself back at his desk, his fingers trailing along the spine of the book that was now in his possession. His cheeks were still burning, and they probably would be for the rest of the day. He was looking forward to going to the library that night, but it wasn’t for the books this time.
taglist: @darthnihila @cdblake1565
animatic depicting the tragedy of the clone wars and answers the question: what if Commander Fox was able to put down the gun and raise it at at someone else?
Song: Take Me to War (Live) by the Crane Wives
if one (1) person asks I will post an in depth analysis of every panel
I wanted to do some anatomy practice and because I need something to motivate me I decided to draw Commander Fox not just that you can see the improvement from when I last drew shirtless clones
𝐌𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐬
Commander Fox x F!Reader Fox is a meticulous man. He doesn’t do things for ‘the sake of it’. So why couldn’t you tell the meaning of his words now? Word Count: 2,133 Warnings: Mild swearing, angst, mean to sad Fox. A/N: This came to me an hour ago and I needed to write it or else I'd be biting my pillow :( I hope whoever reads this will enjoy it <33
Fox is mean. Fox is rude. He’s rude, but in such a way that one can’t counter. Fox is a meticulous man. He doesn’t do things for ‘the sake of it’. No. Each word and action has meaning to it. Usually you prided yourself on being able to read his mind, understand his tactics. So why couldn’t you tell the meaning of his words now?
“It’s over. Don’t try to contact me again.” Were his words as he sipped on some whiskey neat. He looked so relaxed, so nonchalant as he destroyed a year-long relationship. But even as his words tore through you, he couldn’t look you in the eye. He didn’t respect you enough to even look at you as he ripped your love for him apart.
“But what about-“
“I’ll come by tomorrow to pick my things up,” He quickly interrupted, intent on silencing you, “It’s about time I did this. I don’t see this relationship working out… In the long-term. You’re fun, but you can’t give me what I need.” He continued, eyeing the golden liquid with a stern gaze and furrowed brows.
His words cut through like broken shards of glass. They dug into your skin, cutting and tearing with practised precision. He was aiming for where it hurt, straight for your heart.
“You’ve got nothing to say?” He asked, finally looking up from his glass. That meant something, but what? You couldn’t tell. Not anymore. “Good. I’ll see you there, two PM sharp.”
“Okay.” You uttered out, looking down at your lap as you reached for your handbag.
“Okay? That’s it?” He prodded with a raised brow. Your reaction set off sparks in his brain, his neurons working hard to convey the confusion from a mental level to a physical one. He expected you to cry, to beg him to stay, to question why he was doing this. He almost felt betrayed by your lack of response.
His body was rigid, shoulders stiff as he remained glued to his seat. The movement of his glass had stopped, his hand resting flat against the table in between the two of you.
It took you a moment to collect your thoughts, to swallow down the flickering, burning pain of your heart shattering.
“I’m… I’m sure you have a reason,” You spoke slowly, carefully, rising from your seat with wobbly legs, “I just don’t wanna hear it. See you later, Commander.” Your words were quiet, meek, as you walked away without sparing another glance at him.
Fox was the one who broke up with you. He was the one who tossed you aside like a used tissue. So why, as you walked further and further away, did his chest hurt and his fingers itch to reach out for you?
Three precise knocks on your door interrupted your holofilm. You were currently laying on your sofa, mindlessly watching your favourite romcom. The events of last night replayed like a broken tape, Fox’s voice replaying like a broken record, and your heart twisting and breaking like a broken toy.
You cried on your way home, you cried as you showered, you cried as you fell asleep. You were hoping it was all a dream, that your darling commander would reassure you, tell you it was ‘just a shitty nightmare’, but deep down you knew it wasn’t.
With a heavy sigh and a heavy heart, reluctantly, you abandoned the comfort of your sofa and made your way over to the front door.
The sooner you let him in, the sooner he would leave.
The soft ‘click’ of your door and the gentle breeze that pushed its way into your apartment had your heart racing and your gut twisting. Bile rose up into your throat as he came into view.
Your gaze remained trained just below his face, centred on his chest. He was wearing the hoodie you had gifted him with. What was the point? Was he doing this just to antagonise you? The sweet and caring Fox you knew was gone, replaced by this complete son of a bitch.
“Hi.” His voice came out sweetly, softly as you opened the door far enough to let him in. You were very eager to slam the wooden structure in his perfectly awful face.
But instead, you turned away, making your way back to your sofa and fuzzy blanket.
“Come in.” You threw over your shoulder, settling into your makeshift comfort.
You retrieved your TV remote, and turned to him one last time.
“Feel free to roam around and get anything of yours. If you need help, or can’t find something, just ask.” And with a soft click, the sound of your favourite holofilm filled the otherwise silent space of your apartment.
All Fox said in response was ‘Okay’ before he got to work, carrying two empty cardboard boxes inside.
He headed into your bedroom first, much to your relief. You really did not want to see him.
Tears crept at the edges of your waterline, tickling and teasing as you attempted to focus solely on the film. But you couldn’t help yourself, and soon after you tuned into the muffled shuffles of Fox moving around your room.
Just a mere day prior, you would have called it your shared bedroom. When not on duty, the Commander spent most of his days at your place. The only time he wouldn’t sleep over was when he was working overnight, which wasn’t often.
Tugging your blanket closer, you dabbed at your eyes, ridding them of any evidence of crying.
But you knew Fox, and Fox knew you. When you woke up, your eyes were red, puffy and swollen. You felt the way you looked; like shit. No amount of makeup or face cleanser could wipe away the evidence of your care for him.
Fox was an observant man. He knew when something was off, no matter how well you managed to mask it. And to know he was the cause of your pain, Fox couldn’t help but cruelly indulge himself in the pain in his heart.
It was a simple fact; you were in love with the Commander of the Coruscant Guard, Commander Fox.
Commander Fox, of the Coruscant Guard, was in love with you. Enough so for his brothers to know of you. He had told them many stories, and even showed them pictures of you.
He had crept into your heart like a preying fox, stealing from your farm until all you were left with was your heart. And that, he stole too.
The sudden noise of your bedroom door opening and closing snapped you from your thoughts. Fox was awfully good at that.
He stood there, holding one of the boxes. It was filled with a few pieces of clothing you had gifted him. Clearly he wanted to hang onto those, and you wouldn’t stop him from doing so. The Chancellor did not pay the clones, you had learned soon after the beginning of your relationship with Fox. The first time you had gifted him a hoodie and some matching socks, he went mute for a whole twenty minutes. He changed out of his blacks very quickly and soon after that before showering you with gentle kisses and words of appreciation.
And now he stood there, clinging onto those few belongings like a small child. He could keep them. You wanted him to have something that belonged to him and him only.
“I-“
“I think you left some things in the bathroom too, if you wanna grab those.” You spoke softly, not even bothering to pause your movie or even glance at him.
“T- Thank you.” He stuttered out, his arrogant, nonchalant façade having faded away the night prior.
With that, he shuffled into your bathroom next, the sound of him knocking a few things over reaching your ears. Followed by a loud ‘Kriff’ before the door clicked open and closed again. That was quick.
“I’ll get going now.” He said, lifting both boxes up. With his back turned to you, you allowed yourself one glance at him.
He was wearing his favourite hoodie and a pair of black joggers. You remembered how he said they were his favourite, they allowed him to breathe easier.
The two boxes looked too large, and even though you knew he was perfectly capable of opening the door himself, you still stood up and went to aid him.
Your hand reached the doorknob just as his did, and you quickly retracted it. Your body took a screenshot, completely flinching away from him. The last thing you needed was for him to touch you, to give you a glimpse of what you loved and cherished, to take it all away and leave you wanting more.
“Sorry.” He muttered, moving away from the door to let you open it.
A soft click and a shuffle later, he was making his way out. With his back turned once more, you allowed yourself one final glance. His curly, overgrown hair was your favourite. White streaks decorated the locks throughout, starting at his root and some ending at the tips.
You loved his hair.
Your fingers itched to reach out, to ruffle and tug at it one last time.
Slowly, he placed the boxes down and turned back around.
Unlike his appearance, his gaze pierced right through you. Fox was a meticulous man. He didn’t do anything without a plan.
“Still have nothing to say to me?” He asked, half expectant, half wary.
Your eyebrows furrowed, and your grip on the doorknob tightened. He sure had a lot of attitude for being the one that broke up with you.
“Excuse me?”
“I know you’ve got something to say,” He paused, his gaze flickering down to the floor, “You always do.” He whispered that last part, almost affectionately, as he looked back up at you.
He looked tired. His eyes were droopy, and his hand twitched at his side, fighting not to drag over his face tiredly. Did he get any sleep? Why did you care? He made sure that that couldn’t be a concern of yours any longer.
“Not really, no.” You said, looking to the door.
“Oh, okay.” He replied, pursing his lips.
The air between you had become cold, and yet somehow stuffy as the two of you stared at each other. “I guess I’ll be going then.. See you around.” He said, turning his back and bending over. You watched him, glued to your spot. There was one question nagging at the back of your head, threatening to spill over the tip of your tongue.
As he took a step away, you followed, until you could stand outside of your doorway.
“Wait.”
He turned around, one eyebrow raised.
“I have a question. Only one.”
“And it’s?” He prodded. His heartbeat was loud in his ears, adrenaline pumping through his veins as he waited. Only you could have him feeling so desperate, so eager, to hear your voice, to listen to your line of thought and questions.
“Was… Was it ever real? Us, I mean.” You asked, hugging yourself. You finally did what you couldn’t do since last night; look into his eyes.
His irises reminded you of warm honey. Soft and sweet, sticky and dense with secrets and cultivated thoughts.
He took a long pause, his eyes searching yours.
You couldn’t rip your eyes from his, and bile rose in your throat once more as he took longer to reply. Maybe he wasn’t even sure what to say. Maybe he wasn’t prepared to answer this question. Maybe he never thought he’d have to-
“Yes. I loved you from the very beginning, and I love you now. I’ll always love you,” He paused, his Adams apple bobbing up and down as he swallowed harshly, “But I can’t be with you.” Not if I want to keep you safe, he thought.
“I see.” You replied, and with a heavy heart, you half turned, propping your door open.
“Goodbye then, Commander.” You uttered, leaning your head against the doorframe.
“Goodbye, cyar’ika.”
With that, you turned on your heel and shut the door behind you.
Fox stood there for a moment, watching the wooden structure as he listened to the sound of you locking the door. Followed by a thump, as you leaned on it and slid down.
Tears pricked at his waterline, salty and unforgiving as he listened to your mellow sobs and hiccups.
Fox was a meticulous man. He never did anything simply for ‘the sake of it’. That’s why he had to do this, to keep you safe.
But he’d be back.
He would be back for you, he would keep you safe and earn your forgiveness, love and trust back.
He would be back for you, once this was all over.
Okay think like - why we never see Fox with his helmet off (excusing the fact the whole time we see him in canon he’s on duty) - is because he wears a compression garment for his face!! I like to think Fox was on the first battle of Geonosis, and suffered heavy injuries that left him well decorated but never to see the front lines again. Now imagine these injuries are burns!!! He’s just like me fr