Clone X Reader - Tumblr Posts

7 months ago

gone, but not forgotten

Fives x F!Reader

word count: 4.4k

Gone, But Not Forgotten

description: you're a bartender at 79s when the 501st gets back from a gruelling campaign. the clones make a game out of seeing who can successfully hit on you, but the one that catches your eye is the one that doesn't try at all, the one whose shoulders are weighed down by a painful loss.

warnings: nothing much, a little fluff & sad fives (post citadel), mentions of death and war as expected, non-established relationship

a/n: i'm probably gonna do a part 2 to this because it was originally gonna have a lot more to it and I still kinda wanna see that play out, but anyway, enjoy :)

part two here: how to feel again

Gone, But Not Forgotten

The low lighting and heavy bass that shook the very bar you were working at were no match for the ruckus that was caused whenever the clones of the 501st entered 79s.

You watched their entry from behind the bar with a small smirk. You spotted their Captain, already shaking his head at his men and bringing up the rear as the men filtered into a booth near the entrance, clearing out the clones who were already sat there.

You were familiar with a handful of the clones of the 501st, and when one of them - Jesse, if you’re remembering correctly - caught your eye, he sent you a wink. You instinctively rolled your eyes, though there was no animosity behind it. Working at a clone bar, people expected you to be sick of the clones, but you couldn't help but find them generally endearing. Sure, they all tried to hit on you, but most of their attempts were so harmless or pathetic that you couldn't find it in yourself to be irritated by it.

As you served a variety of customers, clones and nat-borns alike, you could see the 501st boys looking over at you and then talking amongst themselves, and you quickly realised that you were to be privy to some kind of game of theirs. Between pouring drinks and cleaning glasses, you watched them with suspicion, and you noticed that there was one particularly sullen looking clone among them, one that you hadn't met before. He didn't seem to be interacting with them much, just sitting back with his arms crossed over his chest and a far-away look in his eyes.

The first to approach the bar was Kix.

“Hey there” He said your name in a flirtatious tone, “What's a pretty lady like you doing working in a place like this?” He leant over the bar a little as he spoke, a charming smile painted on his face. If his words weren't so utterly ridiculous and overused, you might have even fallen for it.

“What should I be doing if not working here Kix?” You asked back innocently with a hand on your hip, playing into his game. For now.

“I'm not sure, but someone with a smile so radiant is surely made for greater things” He smiled triumphantly, as if he had just said the most flattering thing and not insulted your career.

“Hm” You tapped your finger on your chin a few times, as if thinking hard about something, “Yeah, it didn't work, nice try though. Can I get you something to drink now?”

“Ugh” Kix slumped down to his elbows in a huff, “I'll just get a fizzbrew”

You laughed at his defeated tone as you reached into the cooler below for his drink, “Come on, did you really think that was going to work?”

“I did! And it's true! Your smile is radiant” He argued as he took his drink from you.

You screwed up your face as he reiterated the compliment, “Kix stop, you failed already, go sit down”

“Alright alright, thank for this” He smiled with a small chuckle as he dropped his credits into your hand.

“No problem”

The next to try it was Dogma.

“Has anyone ever told you that you have the most wonderful hair?” He leaned on the bar and tipped his head to the side a little with a wide grin.

“Oh maker Dogma, that's awful. Is that really the best you've got?” You couldn't help but laugh at his attempt.

“Uh-” He rubbed his neck sheepishly, “Maybe”

You smirked at him and took a glass from the back, “Krilliz?”

His eyes lit up, “You remembered”

“Of course I did, nobody else orders this nightmare fuel”

“Hey! I like it”

“And I'm glad, here” You handed him his drink with a smile, “Enjoy”

He thanked you with a sigh and headed back to the snickering of his squad mates.

Over the next hour, almost every member of the group came up to the bar and tried to flirt with you in some way, and you honestly couldn't figure out what game they were playing. Though, it was hard to know, as you shot all of them down almost immediately.

When it came time for the last clone of the group, you were a little bit worn down by it all.

“I'll get a shot of that Shesharilian vodka stuff”

The regularity of the statement was refreshing, you almost weren't expecting it.

“You're not going to tell me how my hair is so wonderful or my smile is so radiant?” You asked with a smirk, earning a chuckle from the clone in front of you, but it held no mirth.

“I would be blind not to notice, but no, I'm not a part of their little game” He admitted, but you don't entirely buy it.

“Which one are you after then?”

“Which what?” He asked, confused by your question.

“Which lady?” You clarified, nodding out into the bar.

“Oh” He chuckled lightly, if a little sadly, “I'm not after that tonight”

“What are you after then?” You asked, and he paused for a moment before sighing.

“A strong drink”

You could see that there was a certain sadness behind the request, and realised that this was the dejected looking clone that you had noticed earlier.

“Coming right up” You said, offering him a gentle smile.

You sorted the drink, stealing glances at the man, noticing the way the coloured lights along the bar seem to make the bags under his eyes more pronounced. You placed the drink in front of him, but when he went to hand you some credits, you stopped him.

“It's on the house”

“What? I can't-”

“Don't worry about it” You smiled and pushed the drink further towards him, “I can tell you need it”

He looked at you for a moment and offered a thankful smile.

“That's… Thank you…” He trailed off, and you told him your name, tapping on your name tag. He repeated it with another thanks, and told you that his name was Fives.

“I couldn't tell” You smirked, pressing a finger to your temple, where he had an aurebesh tattoo. He chuckled lightly and thanked you again, taking his drink back to the 501st table.

You watched as his brothers all patted him on the back, and he rolled his eyes with a small smile as he settled back into his seat at the edge of the group. You wondered if he had just used the sad boy approach to appeal to your better nature, and win whatever game they were playing, but you soon forgot all about it as you got on with your work.

The bar was particularly busy tonight, so you had your hands full when it came to making drinks. It seemed that there were quite a few clone legions back on Coruscant at the moment, including the 104th, who got roped into the 501st game quite easily. A flurry of clones adorning grey armour sauntered up to you, offering a variety of compliments, and getting more ridiculous each time as you rejected each one of them. Truthfully, there were a number of them that appealed to you, but you weren't going to entertain their silly idea of a good time.

At some point between all the compliments and rejection, the sad clone you now knew as Fives had settled into a seat on the end of the bar. You noticed him sitting there as the bar area became more sparse, most people opting to make their way towards the dance floor.

You slid up to him and leant on the bar, your jaw resting in your hand as you address him. “So Fives, is this wistful look in your eyes authentic, or was it just so you could win this little thing you 501st boys have going on?” You asked with a cocked eyebrow, and he looked up, the ghost of a smirk crossing his lips.

“I meant it when I said I wasn't a part of their game, not that they believed me after you gave me a free drink” He replied matter-of-factly.

You chuckled slightly, standing up straight, “Can I get you anything?”

He looked behind you at the bar for a short moment. “I probably shouldn't, I hear drowning your sorrows isn't a healthy thing to do” He smiled sadly.

“Why ever else would you come to a bar when you're sad?” You teased slightly, and he huffed a laugh.

“Because I was dragged out of bed by my brothers”

You laughed with a warmth, “Ah well, how about just some water then?”

“Sounds good” He smiled genuinely.

You got him the water from the tap and he thanked you for it before you went about sorting drinks for the other patrons that had approached the bar in the time you had been talking to him. You kept an eye on him out of the corner of your eye as you did so, and he just drank his water at a slow pace, watching his brothers dance ridiculously with a small smile and that same far away look in his eye.

As the night went on and he settled into the chair at the bar more and more, a Pantoran woman approached him, and started flirting with him unashamedly. Fives replied to her questions, not wishing to seem rude, but was too distracted by his own thoughts to entertain the kind of ideas that she surely had about the night. You watched as the Pantoran started getting a bit handsy, placing her hands on his arm and his chest as she talked to him. You saw that Fives didn’t react to this very much, but then she got very close, her lips close to his ear, and he backed away a little.

As she was speaking into his ear seductively, he looked over at you and saw you watching. You averted your eyes as you saw his smirk grow, knowing he caught you looking.

You went about busying yourself with cleaning glasses, facing the back of the bar. When you turned around to serve a customer that called for you, you caught the Patoran woman dancing with another clone on the dance floor. You smiled at the sight, she got what she wanted after all.

Fives was still sat at the end of the bar as your shift came to a close and customers were dwindling a little, so you approached him again.

“You didn't fancy the Pantoran?” You asked and he looked to you from the dance floor, turning his body.

“Didn't want to make you too jealous Cyar'ika” He leaned forward with a smirk and you chuckled.

“How considerate” You rolled your eyes a little as you grabbed a cloth and begun cleaning up the bar. “How come you're still here? Doesn't seem like you're really enjoying yourself” You observed and he released a small sigh.

“Just distracting myself really” He admitted, and you felt yourself wanting to ask more.

You approached the subject tentatively, speaking in a gentle voice, “If it's not too much to ask… what are you distracting yourself from?”

Fives paused, and with a deep sigh, looked to your eyes, seeing only an honesty in them, “I lost a brother a week ago, my twin”

“Oh, I'm so sorry, this must really be the last place you want to be then” You offered him a truly sympathetic look, and he smiled a little.

“I don't know, the company's not so bad” He let his smile grow and you reflected the gesture back at him.

“You're not so bad yourself” You grinned, then your mouth dropped as you became more serious, “But seriously” You placed a hand on his, “I'm really sorry about your brother, I know how hard that is”

He gave you an appreciative smile and turned his hand over in yours, giving it a light squeeze, “Thank you, I really appreciate that”

You smiled, and continued wiping the bar, trying to ignore the warmth that lingered on your hand from his touch.

You started doing little chores before you headed off, sweeping the floor behind the bar. As you were doing so, a rather inebriated clone approached the bar.

“Hey there pretty one, three shots of dark lum please”

“Of course” You replied with a gracious smile, and took three shot glasses from below the bar. As you were pouring the customer's drinks, they tried to talk to you some more.

“Say, when do you get off work tonight beautiful?”

You chuckled, “In a few hours”

“How many hours?”

You shrugged dismissively with a polite smile, “A few”

He kept pressing, but Fives interrupted him before he could really embarass himself.

“She's already got company tonight brother” He told him, a hand on his arm to pull him backwards slightly.

“Fives! I didn't see you there” The clone said, surprised, only earning a grunt from his brother. “Alright, good for you man, nice score” He chuckled and took the shots away as Fives rolled his eyes.

“Sorry about him” He shook his head.

“Its alright, I'm used to it” You shrugged, an appreciative smile directed at him.

“I'm sure you are, but I'm still sorry. Some of my brothers can be a bit… crass”

You laughed at that, “I'm aware”

You watched Fives for a moment, then leant on the bar looking at him intently. “So what are we doing when I get off work then?” You said with mischievous glint in your eye.

“Oh, sorry about that, I just said it so he'd leave you alone” He spoke awkwardly.

You tutted, pursing your lips, “That's too bad, I was rather looking forward to it”

Fives’ eyebrows raised, “You were?” He unconsciously leaned forward a little.

“Perhaps” You said, then pushed back, leaning against the back of the bar, “If you were only joking though-”

“Hold on now, I didn't say that” He challenged, and you bit the inside of your cheek, trying to decide if what you had in your head was really a good idea.

“If you fancy it… there's a place I go when I want to be alone. I know there's not many places like that on Coruscant but I figure you could maybe do with some peace and quiet, just to think, grieve, whatever you want. I was thinking of going there anyway” You shrugged as if it was the most casual thing in the world, offering this almost stranger your safe space.

“That sounds nice” He said genuinely, a smile on his face “I'd love to”

“Alright, well I actually get off in 5 minutes, so be ready” You confessed and he laughed, standing from his seat.

You finished cleaning up and took your apron off, hanging it up in the store room out the back. When you exited the building, Fives was waiting, and when he spotted you coming towards him he pushed off the wall he was leaning against, “Where to?”

You gestured your head towards your speeder bike close by to him and got on. As you began getting it ready to drive, you noticed that Fives was just standing next to you.

“Well get on” You laughed and his ears tinged pink. He climbed on behind you, and you were about to depart but then you turned to him, “Are you gonna hold on or…”

He rolled his eyes a little, “Just trying to be respectful” He mumbled as his hands snaked around your waist holding your abdomen gently. You couldn’t deny the way his touch sent a shiver up your spine, a warmth spreading over the area where his strong arms brushed against you.

“Well you won't get the chance if you fall off, so hold on tight”

The speeder zoomed off as you rolled your hands forward on the handlebars, and Fives’ arms tightened around you as he pulled himself into you. The sensation of him being pressed up against you made you a little breathless, despite the thick layer of armour that separated you from the warmth you could feel emanating from him.

It served as a sudden reminder of the strangeness of the situation you had put yourself in. You saw clones in the bar every day, and while you certainly found them attractive, it had never occurred to you to actually seek any kind of companionship from any of them before. You weren't even certain that was what you were doing right now, every decision you had made up to this point suddenly seemed entirely spontaneous, misguided even.

Halfway through the journey, Fives gently leaned his temple onto the back of your head, and your stomach did a flip. Even at the high speed you were going, you could feel his warm, steady breath ghosting over the back of your ear, and you had to really try not to shudder at the feeling of it.

After around 15 minutes or so, you arrived at your destination. You brought the speeder bike into an alley, and lead Fives to the apartment building you were headed towards.

“Was this just a ploy to get me to come back to your place?” He smirked slightly, a look of disbelief in his eyes.

“No” You chuckled, “This isn't my building” You spoke confidently, walking through the front door. Fives followed after you, entirely confused.

“Hey there doll, late shift again?” The Gran on reception called to you as he noticed you enter.

“It was, I'm so tired” You said dramatically, and Fives' face contorted to one of utter amusement and confusion.

“Got someone with you tonight, that's new. Lucky man” The Gran winked at Fives and you laughed slightly awkwardly.

“Indeed” You said, giving a smirky side glance to Fives, who just stayed quiet throughout the exchange. “See you later Faadu” You called as you made it inside the elevator.

You didn't listen out for the answer, and after the doors closed, Fives turned to you, “I thought you said this wasn't your apartment building”

You smirked and shrugged “He doesn't need to know that”

Fives smirked back at you, and your stomach flipped as you realised how close he was to you in the somewhat confined space. You continued to look at each other, inspecting each other's features. There was definitely a certain charm to Fives that inexplicably drew you to him more than the other clones. His eyes were a deep brown, and as you found yourself lost in them, you couldn’t find it in yourself to remember that they were identical to the ones you so often saw in the bar. Fives went to say something, but the elevator pinged and the doors slid open.

“This is it” You stepped out into the darkened hallway, and traced the steps that were so familiar, though you hadn't been here in a long time.

You made it to the end of the hallway, and hooked your fingers into the door, struggling slightly as you pulled it open. You walked into the empty apartment and made your way over towards the balcony, already captivated by the familiar view out of the large windows.

“Woah” Fives spoke quietly, following you to the balcony.

“I know right” You pushed the doors open and walked up to the railing, leaning your weight onto it, “It's the tallest building in the district, but no one lives on the top floor”

Fives joined you, coming to rest beside you on the railing, and you both looked out on the cityscape. There was a gentle breeze, and you felt your hair shift gently. The view was undeniably beautiful, and being able to look upon the city from above was truly something spectacular, though it held some complicated feelings for you. You were glad that someone was here with you, it was nice to share the space.

“I just find that… When I'm here, it makes my problems seem small, insignificant. Like, I see all these tiny little dots that are really people, and all these different lives, and it brings me… comfort, or perspective, I guess”

Fives watched you confess with interest and you turned to see his expression, full of an emotion you couldn’t quite place your finger on.

“Not that your problems are small, they're not, but-”

“I know what you mean” He smiled, a hand resting on your forearm. He left it there as he recalled something you had said earlier, “How come you were coming here tonight?”

“What?” You asked, swallowing as you felt the warmth of his hand through his glove.

“Before, you said you were coming here anyway” He reminded you.

“Oh, I- um” You looked down to your feet, “I lost my brother a year ago today”

Fives viewed you with a newfound reverence and understanding, and his hand found its way down your arm. He interlaced his fingers with your own, and started rubbing circles on your hand with his thumb. It was certainly a welcome feeling, and it kept your tears at bay, staying as a glassy outer layer to your eyes.

“I know it's not exactly the same as with your brother, but… I came here a lot when I was grieving” You looked up to him, “If it would help you, feel free to come here whenever you want. I mean, it doesn't belong to me anyway” You said, ending in a chuckle and looking out to the view again.

“Thank you, it really means a lot” He smiled, though you weren't looking at him. He followed your lead and looked out to the city as he spoke, “Being in the GAR, losing brothers is part of the deal, and you're expected to just move on, but… It's not that simple, especially with-” He swallowed, “The brother that I lost, we'd been together since we came outta the tube, I don't know what life even means without him next to me” He admitted, and you looked to him to see that his eyes were full of sadness, his eyelids half closed as if weighed down by his emotions.

“What was his name?” You asked, and he looked up to you.

“Echo”

“Why was he called that?” You asked. You knew that often clones’ names held some kind of meaning, or a story behind them at least.

Fives chuckled sadly, “He was always driving us mad by repeating the orders we were given”

You smiled, “And… how did you get your name?”

Fives grinned, “Guess”

You thought for only a split second, “You have a lot of fives in your CT number?”

“Bingo” He smiled, then faltered, looking away wistfully “yeah, ARC-5555”

“You're an ARC?” You asked, a small smirk fighting its way on your face.

“Mhm”

“That's kinda hot”

“It is?” Five turned to you with an incredulous look, and you couldn't help but let your smirk grow.

“Oh yeah, I mean, it's not like, Captain or Commander or even Lieutenant-”

“Alright alright” He rolled his eyes, and your smirk transformed into a genuine smile.

“Was Echo an ARC too?”

His amused expression faltered a little bit, “Yeah, we got promoted together” He sighed, a fond smile gracing his features, “He was always more serious about everything, kept me in check”

“You don't seem like someone who needs keeping in check” You said, tilting your head as you looked at him.

He smirked, “I'm not always this reserved. On any other night I would've been performing for your attention like the rest of my brothers”

“That's ironic I guess” You chuckled.

“How so?”

“You're the only one that did get my attention” You admitted, blushing slightly, now feeling a little sheepish under his gaze.

Fives just smiled subtly and brushed his thumb over your knuckles, reminding you of the fact that he was still holding your hand, “I guess I've gotta keep up the sad and lonely act then”

You laughed, “I don't know about that. It worked on me but I'm not sure that other women are into it”

“That's alright, I wasn't really thinking of trying it on other women” He said, dropping his voice just a bit so that it held a slightly gravelly tone.

You bit back a smirk, “Smooth Fives, very smooth”

He chuckled, “I wasn't kidding, I don't just hold hands with anyone”

“Mhm, I'm sure” You shook your head slightly, looking away from his intense gaze.

The two of you fell into a comfortable silence, letting the noise of the city replace conversation. You could hear the whizzing of speeders and other transports passing by, the noise of the people below very feint from the height of the building. You sighed deeply, remembering your brother, the reason you had come here in the first place. Fives’ thoughts dwelled on the same thing, his own brother.

“Thank you for talking to me about Echo” He spoke just above a whisper and you turned to him, “Most people just give me a sad look and a hand on the shoulder at most. It's nice to actually talk about him”

“I know” You offered him a sad smile, silently telling him you knew how he felt, “Anytime”

Fives smiled and gave your hand a small squeeze.

Being here with Fives was nice, a relief to the mental torment you found yourself enduring when you had been here grieving your brother just after his death. His presence was calming, soothing, and his hand in yours even more so. You found yourself hoping that this wouldn't be the last time you shared this experience with him.

Gone, But Not Forgotten

Tags :
7 months ago

a tricky situation

Kix x F!Reader

word count: 2.8k

A Tricky Situation

description: you're used to the antics of the 501st as a mechanic aboard the Resolute, but one clone takes it too far. when pulling one of his typical pranks on you, kix does something you never expected.

warnings: angst, swearing, miscommunication, kinda enemies to lovers I suppose, blood & injury but not in detail, not really proof-read

a/n: I maintain that Kix is a massive tease, but also a massive softie so... here's this. feel free to tell me my characterisation is wrong, I'll probably agree with you

A Tricky Situation

You were grumbling to yourself once again.

It was something you found yourself doing too often, and you worried that soon enough your colleagues would stage an intervention and send you to get psychologically evaluated. You weren’t actually going crazy, but sometimes it felt like it.

Being a mechanic that worked aboard the Resolute, you frequently found yourself at the mercy of the clones of the 501st. Everyday, there was some new trick, some prank they were pulling. Today, it was the classic hiding your tools that they did at least twice a week, sometimes even twice a day. It was the first of the day, but it still had you ready to pull your hair out.

There was very few of them that actually let you get on with your job, and they were unquestionably your favourites. Though, that only amounted to being Captain Rex and Dogma. The rest, were positively menaces.

You had already searched through their barracks, unapologetically waking a few clones up, you had been to the engine room, the control centre, and through every side room you could possibly find, and you still hadn’t found them. You could use the ones belonging to the other mechanics, but it was late at night, and there wasn’t anyone else working. You stood in the middle of a corridor with your head in your hands.

Where haven’t I checked?

It then occurred to you who would’ve played this stupid prank on you, someone who would also be up this late at night, and you ground your jaw. Kix. You stalked off to the medbay, and if anyone had walked past you, they would have seen the steam coming out of your ears.

There was something particularly irritating about the clone medic, something you couldn’t put your finger on that made him be able to get under your skin like no other. He didn’t even try as hard as his brothers, but every single conversation with him felt like a game, an infuriating dance of taunting and tormenting. It didn’t help that you found him to be the most handsome among his brothers. Perhaps that was the reason you found him so annoying, but you weren’t going to analyse that right now.

You kicked the door to the medbay open with one swift motion and stormed inside, a surprised look on the face of the one you were after.

“Kix, so help me maker, I will shoot you if you don’t give me them back now” You growled at him, and he stood, setting down the datapad he held on one of the cots.

“My dear, I have no idea what you are on about” He said, a small taunting smile gracing his lips.

You clenched and flexed your hands at your sides, “Kix, this isn’t funny, I’m on a deadline with this one. Give them back”

The medic came to stand in front of you and placed his hands on your shoulders, running them down to your biceps. If it wasn’t him that had made you so angry, you may have even enjoyed it.

“Give what back?” He asked plainly, and you shook your head, your teeth grinding together so hard you were positive they would break. Kix could see the flame of anger in your eyes that he so loved. Winding you up was certainly his favourite pastime.

“You know what. I need my tools”

“Why would your tools be here?” He asked, cocking his head to the side, then came in closer, “You do know this is the medbay, right?”

You rolled your eyes so fast they could have rolled out of their very sockets. You ripped your arms from his grasp, and stormed around the room, turning over every single thing and huffing to yourself when you didn’t find anything. Kix watched you with utmost amusement. He would have to tidy up after you, but it was almost worth it to see you so worked up. Almost.

“Alright, alright. Relax. They’re in the closet” He called, and you rushed to the door that he was pointing at.

You switched on the light, which afforded little more visibility, but you saw your toolbox sat on the floor just by the door. You picked it up as you heard the door slide closed, and turned to see that Kix had closed you in with him.

“Get out of my way” You huffed, giving him your best withering look.

“What? No thank you?” He grinned. That damn beautiful smile of his.

“Thank you? You must be joking”

“I helped you find your tools, I think I deserve a little something” He reasoned, and you let out a disbelieving laugh.

“And what, pray tell, do you think you deserve?”

“I was thinking something along the lines of… a kiss?” He suggested.

All of your insides constricted as the word left his lips, and you were frozen on the spot.

“What?” You almost whispered out, eyes still burning with some form of rage.

Kix smirked, “You see, I know you think you’re pretty slick, but I see you looking at me when you think I’m not paying attention-”

“I do not!”

You do.

“- and I know the reason you pretend to hate me so much is because otherwise you’d just be falling at my feet-”

“I hate you so much because you do things like this!” You argued, holding up your recently stolen toolkit.

“Is that right?”

It was then that you realised that you were only a hairbreadth from his face, your nose almost touching his. You breathed heavily, not daring to utter even one word for fear of losing your composure in an entirely different way. Your eyes burned into his with an intensity that you couldn’t control, and his infuriating smirk only made it worse. After a moment, his mouth uncurled from the taunting expression, looking at you only with interest and nothing else.

Your eyes fell to his lips, and he leaned ever so slightly forwards, brushing his nose against yours gently. Your eyes fluttered shut on instinct, and you breathed out shakily. Your mind was screaming out and silent at the same time, it couldn’t make sense of what was happening, and your heart took precedent, giving into whatever it was.

Kix then brought his lips to your ear, brushing back a piece of hair behind it with his hand.

“Gotcha”

You were immediately snapped from your trance and recoiled, a look of absolute shock plastered across your features. Kix just watched you with his knowing smirk, and your anger flared once again, but this time, it was underpinned by an emotion he wouldn’t have expected. Hurt.

“You’re a cruel man Kix” You seethed out as you shoved him aside, opening the door and storming out of the medbay.

He watched you go, his insides twisting with guilt. He had only meant to tease you, but he had taken it too far, and now you were actually upset. You were usually too mad at him to ever let any other emotions slip through the cracks, but now he realised that maybe he had just never pushed you to a breaking point before. He was foolish to think that you didn’t have a limit.

You fought to keep tears from spilling from your eyes as you finished your work that evening. You were so frustrated with yourself for letting your guard slip, and even more for reacting this way to what was really a stupid prank, and nothing else. It hadn’t occurred to you before that your attraction to Kix was anything more than that, but now that he had truly embarrassed you, you realised it was more deep-set than that.

You actually liked him, he was right, and he used it just to trick you.

A Tricky Situation

“Hey, I need to talk to you” You heard a voice, his voice, call out as you were slid under a gunship the next day, your arms elbow deep in wires and grease.

“I have no interest in talking to you” You stated plainly, all emotion stripped from your voice.

Kix’s heart clenched at the sound of it.

“Please” He said your name in such a pleading tone, “I need you to know I-”

“Just can it Kix, I don’t want to hear it” You slid from underneath the gunship and looked up at him sternly.

He didn’t intend for this at all. In truth, it was him that really wanted to kiss you. While it was true, he had caught you looking at him sometimes, he had no reason to believe that it was because you liked him, and he only really said it to hopefully push you to a confession. Every time he had wound you up, it was just an excuse to see you react to him, to grab your undivided attention. It was a cowardly approach, making you confess before he did, but now he may never even get the chance if you wouldn’t let him.

“You don’t understand, I-”

“I understand just fine, you used my feelings as fodder for another prank, how surprising” You rolled your eyes, “Leave me alone from now on, if it’s not too tempting to try and embarrass me again”

Kix was floundering for the right thing to say, “It wasn’t a pr-”

“Fuck off Kix, can you not hear me?” You almost shouted, gaining the attention of a few of the nearby clones.

His amber eyes burned into yours. You could see he was sorry, but you’d rather let him feel guilty for what he did than accept any apology he could offer. As you stared each other down with an intensity to rival the previous night, you could feel your emotions getting the better of you.

“Just go away” You said quietly, sliding back underneath the gunship without another word.

You could see Kix hesitate, but you watched him ultimately decide to leave you alone, and walk away. You sighed, feeling your eyes well up with frustration. You were embarrassed all over again.

A Tricky Situation

It had been a week since what the other mechanics were just calling ‘the incident’. They had no idea why you had shouted at the clone, and you wouldn’t tell them, but that didn’t stop them teasing you about it. A silver lining about the whole ‘incident’ was that the clones had started leaving you alone, and your tools had not been stolen once. It was certainly peaceful, and you were reluctant to admit that life now felt boring, for fear that the clones would all suddenly come out of the woodworks with the worst prank of them all. Not that they could top the one already pulled by their medic.

You hadn’t even seen Kix since said ‘incident’, but your head was still maddeningly filled by him. The most maddening fact of all being that it wasn’t your argument that was stuck in your head, it was the way he looked at you as he pretended he was going to kiss you. It had felt so real, so sincere, and as it kept replaying in your head you found yourself wishing to go back in time and just kiss him.

But that would do no good, it was still a prank at the end of the day.

You were working under a ship, your hands buried in wires and a tool between your teeth. You heard someone call out for you and sat up, whacking your head on the underside of the ship in the process, the tool falling from your mouth as you shouted out in pain. You vaguely heard the person shout something along the lines of ‘nevermind, got it’ and cursed them for speaking in the first place. You brought your hand up to your head and felt small trickle of blood, or was it grease?

Then there you were, grumbling to yourself once again.

You stormed off to the medbay reluctantly, but this time you had no intention of speaking with Kix. You opened the door forcefully with your shoulder and made a beeline for the nearest cot, rifling through the draws next to it for a bandage or anything else.

“What are you-” Kix had watched you come in, and was utterly perplexed by your actions until he saw the mix of grease and blood trickling down your forehead. “What happened?” He asked, coming over to inspect the wound.

You just stayed silent.

He said your name gently, drawing your attention and you glanced at him briefly, “What does it look like? I hit my head” You said, finally finding a small bacta patch in the draw. You took it and peeled off the back, sitting down to apply it.

“Woah” Kix reached forwards and took your wrist before you could place it down, “Let me clean that for you first”

You grabbed your wrist back, “I don’t need any help”

“The grease will only infect the wound” He said, grabbing the patch from you, “Sit still”

You glared at him, “I don’t care, I’d rather let it get infected”

“Well it’s a good thing I care then isn’t it” He replied, pulling out an antiseptic wipe.

You sat in silence with what he’d just said. Is this part of his latest trick? Kix gently grabbed your chin, tilting your head to get a better look at the wound. He brought the wipe up to it, “This is going to sting a bit”

And it did.

You hissed as the wipe came into contact with your wound, moving away from the clone inflicting the pain, but he just kept going until there was no more grease or blood dripping out of it.

“Wait here. Please don’t leave”

You watched him suspiciously as he moved away to retrieve something. He was being uncharacteristically serious and kind for someone who loved to tease you. He returned a moment later with some bacta and a bandage, and applied it without another word.

“You know, if I didn't know better, I'd think you were avoiding me” He said, the corners of his lips turning up at the attempted joke.

“Well clearly you don’t know any better then” You rolled you eyes.

He spoke your name in a soft tone as he finished applying the bandage, “That hurts” He said in mock hurt, a hand resting on his heart.

“Good” You replied instantly, looking up to his eyes to find him now looking at you seriously. He just watched you for a moment, and your own scowl softened slightly without your permission.

“I’m sorry” He said softly.

You bit your lip a little, looking away, “I know you are”

He brought his hand back to your chin, forcing you to look at him as he spoke, “I didn’t mean to embarrass you. I-” He gulped, “I wanted to kiss you”

Your heart leapt to your throat and your eyebrows furrowed, and then scrunched up, going through a million emotions at once.

“Is this a joke?” You asked, your tone hesitant and unsure.

“No” He said firmly, stepping forwards and finding himself between your knees, “I’m sorry for… the way I went about it. I only wanted to tell you that…”

You looked up at him with widened eyes, hanging on every word.

“I wanted to tell you that I have… feelings for you, and it- well, it all backfired” He chuckled slightly, and you let your mouth form a small smile.

“And this is real? You actually like me?” You asked once more for conformation.

“It’s real. I like you, I really like you” He admitted, his hand moving from your chin to cup your jaw.

You leant into his touch a little, and his heart did a flip, “I… I like you too, but I think you already knew that” You grinned a little and his lips formed the smirk that you usually found so maddening.

“I might’ve had some idea” He spoke teasingly, then stroked your cheek with his thumb, “Care to try that kiss again?”

You didn’t reply, and instead pulled him down by his chest plate to meet his lips with yours. It was a slow and meaningful kiss, both you and Kix making no haste and just savouring the moment. You felt him hum contentedly against you, and you smiled into the kiss, breaking away to catch your breath a little. He placed his forehead on yours, but you pulled away quickly when your wound began screaming out against the action.

“Sorry” He chuckled then placed a light kiss on top of the bandaged area, “There, that’ll make it all better”

You smirked, “Is that a treatment you give all your patients?”

“No” He smiled, “Only my favourite one”

A Tricky Situation

Tags :
7 months ago

how to feel again

Fives x F!Reader

word count: 3.1k

How To Feel Again

part two to gone, but not forgotten

description: since meeting fives and showing him to your secret space on coruscant, he had come to 79s almost every day to spend time with you. when he doesn't come in for weeks, you realise how much of a hole his absence leaves in your life.

warnings: fluff!!! small amount of sad fives, I think that's pretty much it, perhaps friends to lovers

a/n: part 2 !! go read the first part or it wont make that much sense. also flirty fives is so fun to write omg p.s. I saw a @/katekenobi edit to this song on tiktok and it's lowkey what inspired this sad fives vibe I suppose, anyway I love it so you must listen too

How To Feel Again

Life had always felt as if it were passing you by, that you were just watching the days go by, doing the same things, day in, day out. Recently, however, everything seemed to have slowed down, and you knew the reason why. Ever since you had met Fives, things had felt different.

Perhaps it was that you weren’t used to getting so much attention from one person, and the regular appearance in your life had captivated your attention so naturally. You were reluctant to get close with anyone new, but you just couldn’t help it. Especially when he would turn up at the bar almost everyday and charm you so effortlessly by simply being himself.

That was how it was until a couple weeks ago at least.

You suspected that Fives and the rest of the 501st had been sent on another campaign, which you couldn’t blame him for, you just wished that you could have known before his absence left a sizeable hole in your simple existence. You hadn’t quite realised what an impact his presence had made on you until it was gone.

Talking with Fives was easy. Usually, he would just sit at the end of the bar and nurse a short glass of liquor, and you would have light conversation as you served drinks to other patrons. Then as people dwindled, he would remain, and you would get to talk properly. He told you lots of stories about his brothers, and you asked a lot about Echo. You loved to see the way his eyes would light up as he told you about him, the joy he got from remembering the good times he spent with him. You told him a lot about yourself, your everyday life, your family, your friends, and the conversation flowed naturally towards deeper topics, with you finding yourself telling him things you hadn’t fully realised yourself. He would ask all the right questions, and challenge your beliefs about yourself and the galaxy in such a simple way; by asking why you thought that way.

It occurred to you that no one had ever cared to understand the way you thought before, and that's what endeared you to him the most.

He had become a great friend in a short time, and now you missed him. You were cautious to assume any ulterior motives in his constant presence, as he was forever turning down the many advances from men and women alike. He was so insistent about it that you were convinced he must have a partner, though you assumed that if that was the case, they probably didn't live on coruscant, as he spent his evenings in your company instead.

You didn't think too far into it, you were just glad to have his company. Though you couldn't help the jealous pang that hit your chest when you saw the latest person flirt with him. He entertained them until they took it too far, and watching it unfold right next to you made your jaw grind.

Tonight was very busy. Your hands were completely full, both metaphorically and literally, every customer seemingly wanting the most difficult drinks to make. You could barely hear people to take their orders over the noise. Though still, the ruckus caused by the 501st was unmatched.

You caught the flash of blue in the low light and your heart skipped a beat, your throat going dry. You tried to look to see if it was Torrent Company, but your focus was quickly drawn by another demanding customer. You focused your attention on them, trying to forget how you had such a visceral reaction to the possibility of Fives being back.

It was a while before you saw him, but the crowd around the bar cleared as if just to make sure you could get a perfect view of the show. Your eyes caught him immediately, his charming smile and highly recognisable tattoo and facial hair standing out among his brothers. He was looking up at a sky blue Twi'lek, who was leaning her arm onto the back of his seat, her face close to his.

Your teeth ground together as you watched him talk to her, your hand tightening around the bottle you were holding. You crossed you arms as he looked her up and down subtly, his gaze settling on her face as he said something to her with a smirk. She seemed somewhat deterred by whatever he had said, and it was then that he cast a glance at you. He caught the deep frown settling over your features, and his smirk widened. You felt yourself go bright red, turning away and pretending to clean glasses to busy yourself.

Not even one minute later, Fives was at the bar.

“Something the matter Cyar'ika?” He spoke, and your heart stuttered at the sound of his voice.

“Hey Fives” You said simply, a smile adorning your features as you turned, as if he hadn't just caught you staring.

“You were giving me quite the sour look just now” He smirked, “Any particular reason why?”

You just shrugged. It seemed that neither of you wanted to acknowledge how much time had passed since you had seen each other last.

“Come on, you can tell me” He said in an almost mocking voice, though there was an undeniable fondness to it.

“Can't a woman have her secrets?” You asked teasingly, resting your hands on the edge of the bar.

“Hm, I suppose so” He replied, and sat in his usual seat towards the end of the bar.

You instinctively sorted his usual drink and placed it in front of him, and he thanked you, handing you some credits.

“That's too much” You handed back his change but he reached out and closed your hand with his.

“Keep it” He smiled, and you couldn't help the way your heart fluttered at the feel of his hand around yours and the kindness in his eyes.

“Thanks” You returned his smile and pocketed the credits, “Shouldn't you be sat with your brothers?” You asked.

“Maybe… But I prefer your company” He said simply, a small grin making its way onto his face.

You chuckled, “Aren't you a flattering one”

“Only for you” He smiled disarmingly.

You raised a brow at him, an amused twinkle in your eye, “You 501st boys doing another little game tonight or what?”

“I don't play games”

“Huh, funny. I remember you telling me how incredible you are at Sabacc”

Fives rolled his eyes, “That's not what I meant”

You gave him a little smirk before moving away to serve the onslaught of customers that were seeking your attention.

The hours were passing exceeding slowly tonight, your time filled by drunken slurring and impatient patrons. It wasn't anything out of the ordinary, but with Fives back in town and sat watching your every movement, it was more frustrating than usual. It was hours later when you got the chance to talk to him again.

“So…” You began, leaning on the bar in front of him, “Where have you been?”. You tried to sound inquisitive rather than accusatory.

“Just away on a campaign” He replied, then cleared his throat, “Uh, I'm sorry I didn't get the chance to tell you, we left with pretty short notice”

“I kinda figured as much” You shrugged with a smile, “It's fine anyway, you don't owe it to me to-”

You were interrupted by a customer shouting at you, and rolled your eyes as you went to serve them. You took their order and gave them their drink quickly, making your way back over to Fives.

“Where were we?” You asked, an exasperated sigh escaping you.

Fives gave you a sympathetic smile, “I was just about to ask how you've been”

“Oh, fine” You replied.

“Just fine? Come on, I want to know what's been going on in your life” He leaned forwards with a grin.

“Well, I'm not su-”

You gritted your teeth together as someone else called for you, and you moved away to serve them.

You didn't get another chance to speak with Fives for the rest of the evening, though you always let your eyes wander over to him in between taking orders and making drinks. You noticed that he became increasingly more dejected and out of it each time you looked at him, but before you could ask what was wrong, he had disappeared from the bar altogether.

You looked around the bar, and couldn't see him anywhere, and when it came time for closing you still couldn't see him. You had a small inkling of where he could be, at least, you hoped that he would be there.

How To Feel Again

When you approached the empty apartment, the door was already slid open. You peeked your head through to make sure it wasn't someone else, but as you hoped, it was Fives that had left it so. He was laying down on the balcony, staring up at the stars and traffic lanes above. You took a few steps inside, but as you got closer to him you could see the tear stains on his cheeks.

You felt awful for intruding on such a private moment, and immediately began backing away, but you could have no such luck as to make it out without a sound. You knocked your knee on one of the side tables that adorned the room and let a curse slip from your lips.

Fives’ head whipped around, leaning on his elbow for support, but his posture relaxed when he saw it was you.

“Sorry” You whispered, a blush creeping up your neck at getting caught.

“Don't be” He smiled, “Join me?”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to-”

“Please, I'd like you to” He spoke with a small hint of desperation, and you couldn't resist it even if you tried.

You walked over slowly and sat down next to him, stretching out your limbs to lay down. For a moment, you two just watched the sky, the speeders passing overhead and the stars that littered the sky. You had never thought to lay down before, but it brought a whole new perspective to the space.

“You never got to tell me about what you've been up to” Fives said, turning to face you. You looked at him, and though you weren't very close together, your stomach still flipped.

“It's okay. It's not very interesting anyway” You chuckled sadly.

“I'm interested” He insisted, and you looked back to the sky when your cheeks started heating up again.

“The last few weeks were very uneventful. I fixed up my speeder and that was pretty much it” You said with a heavy sigh, “Nothing ever really goes on in my life to be honest, like I've said before. The job at the bar is all I really have”

“I'm sure you could have some stuff going on, like friends? boyfriends? stuff like that?” He suggested, and you let out a small laugh.

“I have friends yeah, but they work during the day so I don't get to see them very often”

“Why don't you work somewhere else then?” He asked.

You sighed again, “I wish it were that easy”

A silence enveloped you both again, watching the sky that felt like it was only for your eyes, a special show for the two of you who were wrapped up in your own little world.

“What are you doing here tonight?” Fives asked softly.

“To be honest? I was kinda hoping to see you here”

He turns to look at you, his eyebrows raised, “You were?”

“Mhm”

Fives waited for you to say something, anything else, but when you stayed quiet he decided to ask, “Why?”

“I don't know really, I suppose I’ve missed you” You admitted, refusing to look at him.

“I missed you too” He replied after a short moment, “And I meant what I said earlier”

You finally looked to him, “Meant what?”

“I enjoy your company”

Fives just looked at you with an indescribably emotion, something you couldn’t define. You admired his features, the features you were so used to seeing, but they somehow seemed new when looking at him.

“I enjoy your company too Fives”

He smiled tightly and then looked up, feeling the urge to share what was on his mind, “Echo hated Coruscant”

“I don't blame him” You agreed, “What about you?”

“What about me?” He looked back to you with a questioning frown.

“Do you like it here?”

He sighed, “I don't know. I don't really know how to feel about anything anymore”

You hummed in understanding of what he meant, you recall feeling similar when your own brother died. In fact, it still felt like that sometimes.

He then continued, “But some parts are okay, some… people”

You didn't catch his emphasis, “I don't know, I haven't met many inspiring people here”

“I sure have” He said definitively.

“Really?” You raised an eyebrow at him.

“Only one maybe” He shrugged, “But I think she's inspiring enough for the whole planet”

You tensed up at his words, facing the sky once again with your thoughts swirling with jealousy. You swallowed hard and tried to keep your breathing steady. It was annoying that Fives being with someone else affected you so much, there was no real good reason that you should feel that way.

“What makes her so inspiring?” You asked, trying to keep the indignation out of your voice.

“She… makes me feel like I'm not alone”

“That's good, I'm glad you have someone like that” You nodded, your jaw tightening with each word. You meant it, but your jealousy was almost giving you a headache.

Fives just watched you amusedly for a moment, and then shifted closer to you slightly, leaning in to speak lowly to you, “You do realise I'm talking about you, right?”

You turned to look at him and he was a lot closer than you had imagined, so close that your nose lightly grazed his as you turned. Your breath caught in your throat as you looked into his rich brown eyes, “You… You think I'm inspiring?”

“Mhm” He hummed, and gently rubbed his nose against yours, purposefully this time.

You were frozen, “Why?”

He inspected the various tones he could see in your eyes now that he was so close, as if it was where he was finding his answer, “You remind me that there's good in the galaxy, something worth… fighting for. I-”

He took a moment to find the words, looking up at the sky, and you allowed yourself to breathe.

“I couldn't stop thinking about you when I was away. Even in the middle of the fight, I couldn't get you out of my head, that… people like you are the reason we have to fight, the reason that I have to fight” He moved his gaze back, rolling onto his side so his body faced you, “Without Echo, I felt lost - I still do, but… You, you give me strength in a different way, the strength to carry on”

You were absolutely stunned into silence. You had never had such an observation made about you before, and you found it almost crazy that someone thought of you as what was ‘good’ in this large galaxy. You weren’t sure what to say, completely at a loss for words.

“Thank you” You breathed out unsurely, the only thing coming to your mind.

“Anytime” Fives smirked a little, a small chuckle sounding in the back of his throat. He didn't leave the close proximity he had put himself into, and instead brought a hand up to your cheek to gently brush his knuckles over your cheek. You could feel your heart pounding in your ears at this point.

“Cyar'ika… Can I kiss you?”

Your heart stuttered, but you let a small smile spread over your lips. “Only if you tell me what that word means” You whispered.

Fives grinned, taking your cheek in his hand. “It means darling” He tilted his head, his eyes falling to your lips as his almost brushed against them. He dragged his thumb along your bottom lip, his eyes then finding yours again, swimming with adoration. “My darling” He whispered, just before he finally locked his lips with yours.

He kissed you deeply, simply taking his time to devour your lips as if the whole galaxy would wait on it. His hand slid to the back of your neck and pulled you closer, deepening the kiss. Your hand found the top of his chest plate, and you pulled him into you further, wanting to be impossibly close to him in this intimate moment. Everything in your body felt as if it had been set alight. Every nerve was electrified and buzzing with passion at the feel of his lips tangled with yours.

Fives pulled back after a while, pressing his forehead into yours his eyes opening to look deeply into yours. You bit your lip and your cheeks flushed a darker shade, feeling nervous under his intense gaze all of a sudden. He chuckled slightly at your reaction, running his thumb along your lip to stop you.

His demeanour then became more serious, “Cyar’ika… I know I can't offer you much, only as much as the war allows me to, and it seems cruel to even ask but… I want you to be mine”

You smiled broadly, a glint of mischief in your eye, “I’d be honoured, you are the most sought-after clone in 79s after all”

Fives rolled his eyes, and pushed you onto your back again, his face above yours as he gently held you waist, “And yet… you’re the only one that caught my attention”

“If you say so” You smiled, nudging his nose with yours.

“I do say so” Fives spoke resolutely, placing a kiss to your jaw, and trailing a few more down your neck. “And I’m going to make sure everyone else knows too” He hummed against your skin, sending a shiver up your spine. He could feel you shudder beneath him and smirked, “That sound good to you?”

“I think I could live with it” You tried to joke, but it came out far too breathless to pretend that he wasn’t having an affect on you.

It certainly sounded appealing for the rest of the patrons of 79s to know that you were his, and that he was yours.

How To Feel Again

Tags :
7 months ago

make it feel better

Rex x F!Reader

word count: 4.3k

Make It Feel Better

description: when scouting a new planet, you fall into a bed of flowers that you understand the effects of all too well. Captain rex is the only person around and the only one who can help you.

warnings: NSFW (18+) minors begone! sex pollen/aphrodisiacs, oral (f! recieving), pinv sex, almost voyeurism not really, some reader masturbation, swearing, little bit of praise, non-established relationship

a/n: okay so this is the first ever proper smut I've posted and I'm SCARED. do not judge me pls and thank you <3 I haven't seen any sex pollen with Rex so I thought I'd try my hand at it

Make It Feel Better

The sun was only just clinging to the horizon as you made your way back to the ship, taking a shortcut through the forest. You and Rex had been scouting for a new, and safe, planet to move to, where the small rebellion you were a part of could operate without detection. This one had been uninhabited, and so far proved to be a solid contender. You had come along because of your in depth knowledge of various flora and fauna across the galaxy, and Rex deemed you the most qualified to ascertain whether or not the planet would be suitable. He also enjoyed your company but he wasn’t going to tell you that.

You and Rex had known each other for many years, as you were somewhat of a consultant to the jedi in the war. Your knowledge of different cultures and languages throughout the galaxy proved most useful, and you often became an intermediary between the Republic forces and the primitive beings you encountered. A lot of your time was spent in the field, which was where you met Rex.

The 501st had been part of a relief mission to Abednedo, where you were required for translation purposes. The Abednedo mostly spoke basic, but it was their written language that proved difficult for the Republic to understand, and with you understanding the Republic’s supply logging system, they opted to have you catalogue the supplies rather than teach the Abednedo to use it.

Rex had been uneasy around you initially, with you being someone from outside of the GAR, but he quickly warmed to you when he saw how well you integrated with the rest of his brothers. That was part of the reason that you joined his band of rebels in the first place - you definitely had a soft spot in your heart for the clones, and even more so for Rex.

Your feelings for Rex had grown steadily. Naturally, you found him to be handsome when you first met, his closely cropped blond hair making him stand out among his brothers, but your attraction for him really set in when seeing him on the battlefield, taking down almost a whole wave of droids with only two DC-17s and his own sheer will.

Though that was years ago. Now, you found yourself harbouring deeper feelings for him, feelings you had been reluctant to admit to yourself.

When Rex had found you after the end of the war, sending you a message on your encrypted comm channel, you felt like you had finally hit a stroke of luck. The transition from the Republic to the Empire was turbulent for you, to say the least. The Empire had uses for your intellect, but you had quickly become disillusioned with the whole regime when you realised the deception that they covered up in every corner of their reach. Rex had all but saved you from the Empire, and for that, you’d always be grateful to him.

Meeting him again after the end of the war, when you hadn’t seem him in some time, was like a breath of fresh air. You had never been exceptionally close with him, no closer than you were with any of the other clones at least, but upon seeing his tired and haggard figure on the other side of the hangar, you couldn’t help but speed over to him and embrace him in a tight hug. He had chuckled and returned the embrace, commenting something about ‘understanding the feeling’.

Since then, the dormant feelings you had previously harboured for him only grew. You worked closely with him, spending most of your days by his side in the command centre, helping however you could. It was an inescapable fate that you would fall for him, and now here you were, living out that very fated feeling. You had no indication from the Captain as to whether he felt the same way, and so you kept it close to your chest, electing to not tell him.

Rex had gone back to the ship to comm the others, to say that this planet you were on could be the one, while you had stayed out to investigate a few final things. The water from the natural springs was drinkable, and the small bug you had captured carried no known diseases, and so you were satisfied that this planet would do nicely. You commed Rex and let him know what you were coming back, not waiting for an answer before you switched it off. It didn't really matter whether he heard you or not, you'd be back soon.

It was dark in the forest as you cut through, but it was just bright enough to see where you were going. Mostly.

You found yourself disproved when your foot caught on a tree root and you were sent tumbling forwards with a small yelp. Thankfully, there was a thick bed of flowers that cushioned your fall, so the pain from the impact dissipated quickly. You stood and brushed yourself off, but immediately felt your nose itching, and before you knew it, you were sent into a sneezing fit. You had sneezed at least ten times before you lost count, and you stumbled forwards, resting yourself against a tree when you came to a clearing.

The orange tone of the sky cast a gentle golden light over you as you caught your breath. The sneezing subsided, but as you breathed deeply, you realised that something felt wrong.

You felt your insides burn hot, the heat spreading through your body like a wildfire. An uncomfortable feeling settled in your stomach, but it quickly twisted into a heavy pain. You doubled over, holding your stomach as it cramped up and sent shockwaves through your system.

You dug your hand into one of the pouches on your belt urgently, pulling out the small torch you carried with you. You switched it on and shined it over the bed of flowers that you had just landed in, and inspected their yellow petals and purple centre, your eyes going wide.

Fuck.

You knew exactly what flower these were, you had studied them and their effects in your time at University on Coruscant. You knew exactly what was going to happen to you, and you almost wish you didn't.

Aphrodisiacs.

You dug your heels into the ground in frustration as you threw your head back into the tree, your eyes screwed shut. The burning in your stomach was quickly transforming from a small flame to a full blown bonfire.

Somehow this was typical. This planet was so close to being perfect, and now you had to go and trip into some flowers that would cause you a pain so sensual you'd be driven out of your mind. It had to be you, didn't it?

As you were writhing against the tree, contemplating if you could really get yourself off right here, you heard your name being called and groaned quietly. Why did he have to come looking for you right now?

You tried your best to stay quiet, listening to him calling out to you and hoping that he wouldn't find you, but then he came through the treeline, his eyes finding your struggling form.

“What's wrong?” He darted over to you, at your side in an instant, and you instinctively flinched away from him. His gaze was filled with worry.

You we're clearly in some kind of pain, your skin damp with sweat and a deep blush across your cheeks.

He reached out for you as he called your name, and you moved away again, having to look away from the man that you desired fiercely at any other given moment, but especially this one.

“Rex” You breathed out, trying to keep your voice steady, “Please don't touch me”

“Why?” He asked quickly, “Is it your skin?”

“It's… everywhere, it's not going to go away, It hurts, it hurts so much” You spoke, though you weren't sure your words were even coherent.

“What hurts?” He asked more urgently, trying to get a read on the problem the best he could without touching you.

I can't tell him. I just need to get him away.

“You need to leave. Go back to the ship and wait for me” You pant.

“What? No, let me help you” He knelt down beside you, his hand itching to reach out and comfort you, “What can I do?”

“Nothing. Please go away” You begged, but he didn't understand what was going on at all. For all he knew, you could be asking him to leave you to die here.

“Please let me help you”

You let a small moan escape your lips, one hand stifling it and the other gripping at your clothes to resist from touching yourself right in front of him.

“Rex please go away” You said desperately, your head now in your hands and gripping at your hair to try and distract you.

“I can't! I can't leave you like this, are you crazy?” His voice was so exasperated, and you ground your teeth together as you shook your head in defiance.

“I need you to leave, now. Plea-” You were cut off by your own whimper escaping your lips.

The pain in your core was becoming unbearable. While you knew you couldn't die from this drug, you knew the only solution was to satisfy the intense desire that it gave you, but you would've taken death before pleasuring yourself in front of Rex.

“Cyar'ika let me help you” He said softly, coming closer to you again.

“Please don't call me that” You practically whined, your body acting without permission and splaying out of the floor, twisting back on itself.

“Tell me what's wrong” He ordered firmly, and you felt your desire for him only spiral further.

“The flowers” You exhaled, “They're making me… hot”

“Hot?”

“Yes, hot” You gritted through your teeth, your hand playing with the top button of your trousers. You had to relieve this pain soon before it became worse.

“What can I-”

“Just leave Rex!” You hissed, the pain becoming blinding, “Please leave” You were on the edge of tears, your frustration nearly matching your arousal. You continued begging, different sentence formations that included the words ‘leave’, ‘please’ and ‘Rex’ tumbling from your mouth in a last desperate attempt.

“Cyar'ika” Rex grabbed your chin, forcing you to look up at him, and another whimper escaped you at his touch, “I'm not leaving you”

You whined, “If you don't leave I-” You couldn't finish the sentence.

“You'll what?”

“I need to- you can't be here” You said already unbuttoning your trousers with shaking hands.

“Why not? Cyare you're not making any sense”

You'd were finally at your limit, the pain driving you insane.

“It's an aphrodisiac Rex!” You screamed, hands tightened into fists to hold yourself back.

Rex froze, “Oh”

“Yeah. Oh” You mustered up a desperate chuckle, curling up in a ball on the floor.

“What should I-”

“I don't know. I don't know, you just need to get out of here before I do something I regret” Your words tumbled over each other as you spoke.

He touched your shoulder lightly, and when you moaned at the simple gesture, he understood how bad it really was.

“Rex, leave!” You screamed at him again, your hand finally finding its way past the waistband of your underwear.

Rex immediately averted his eyes, “I'm just going to be over there, I don't want to leave you here like this”

“Whatever! Just do it!” You said, a loud moan escaping you as you fingers found themselves running easily through your slick folds.

Rex quickly moved away from you. The sounds of your moans spilling from your lips were driving him crazy, but he was also overwhelmingly worried about you. He wanted to help you, but he knew that wasn't something he could really do without… well, fucking you. The idea alone was working him up, and the sound of your moans growing more and more frustrated had his cock hardening and pressing into his codpiece uncomfortably.

“It's not working” You cried out and removed your fingers from working your clit to pull your top off, trying to at least ease some of the heat. You were at your wits end, your thoughts all blurred together.

“Rex!” You shouted helplessly, “Please come here!”

Rex ran back over to you in a flash, the sight of your body sprawled out on the floor making his heart beat out of his chest.

“It burns” You choked out, tears spilling from your eyes, “It hurts so much”

“Maybe I could help?” He suggested, letting his emotions get the better of him.

“Help?” You said in a disbelieving laugh, “Are you going to fuck me yourself Rex?”

The silence was so loud.

You looked up at him, standing above you, and his expression was absolutely flat.

“You're serious?” You practically gasped, and he just nodded.

You brought yourself onto your knees and cradled your head in your arms, mumbling under your breath. “Maker, this is so fucked up, I can't believe this is happening. I can’t-”

Rex interrupted your ramblings as he knelt down in front of you, placing his hands on your arms to take them away from your head. You looked up to him desperately, and you could see the pity in his eyes.

“Rex it hurts, it really hurts” You whispered, the pain continuing to burn into you.

“I know” He said soothingly, “I'm going to help you, okay? I'll make it feel better”

You whimpered, your breathing calming just the tiniest bit.

“Is that okay?” He asked, getting a confirmation that this is what you wanted from him.

“Yes” You breathed out, any shame now escaping you, “Please help me”

With that, Rex took you up in his arms, and darted back the short distance to the ship. He set you down on the bunk in the back area and pulled off your trousers and underwear in one swift motion. The sight that greeted him drew a deep groan from within his throat, but he was hesitating.

“Rex please” You begged in a strangled moan, needing to feel him immediately.

“I'm sorry Cyar'ika, I just didn't think it would happen this way” He said honestly.

“Wha-?”

Before you could even ask what he meant, his tongue found its place between your legs. You cried out, the pain in your stomach melting away into pure pleasure. He was eating you out as if it was his last meal, as if he hadn't eaten in weeks. It felt so incredible, and yet, your head still felt foggy, and your pulse was elevated to an unhealthy rate. Even as he worked at your clit, the sensation of him sucking and biting feeling divine, given straight from the maker, you knew it wasn't enough.

“Rex I need-” You began, your words getting caught in your throat.

“Tell me what you need Cyare” He hummed against your pussy, “Anything”

Your hips bucked, “I need more, I need you” You panted.

“I'll need a little bit more than that I'm afraid” He said, and you looked down at him to see the slight teasing smile curling his lips.

“Please don't make me say it” You whined as he licked a stripe from your entrance to your clit.

“Come on Cyar'ika, tell me” He cooed, his hands gripping at your thighs tightly.

“I need your cock! I need you inside me Rex! Please” You finally admitted, and felt Rex hum against your core.

“See that wasn't so hard was it” He rumbled.

He placed a kiss to your clit before he moved away, and you shuddered, feeling the pain begin to twist at your core once more. Rex made short work of his armour, his dexterous fingers working the clasps quickly, his brain on autopilot as he looked down at you writhing beneath him. He then slipped off his blacks and his cock finally sprung free. You moaned as you saw it, throwing your head back onto the bunk and trying not to think about how wrong this was.

“See something you like Mesh’la?” You knew Rex was smirking, you could hear it in his voice. It only drove you more insane.

“Shut up and fuck me Captain” You hissed, which pulled a deep groan from Rex.

He chuckled slightly as he replied, “Yes Ma’am”

He lined himself up with your entrance and looked up to you for confirmation, taking your face in his hand to make you look at him. You could see the question in his eyes, and behind all of your blinding arousal, your heart fluttered at the careful actions of the man you were undoubtedly in love with. You nodded.

“Please” You sounded so pathetic, and Rex brushed his thumb across your cheek tentatively.

“I’ve got you Cyare, don’t worry, I’ll make it better”

He breached you entrance and the moan that escaped your lips was the most sinful sound he had ever heard.

“Oh Rex” You whimpered sadly, and he stopped his movements to check that you were okay.

“What is it?” He rocked his hips back and then forward very gently, earning another moan. “What is it Mesh'la?” He whispered.

“I'm sorry” You whispered

“Why are you sorry?” He frowned, and pushed your hair from your face to get a proper look at you.

The pain burned hot inside you, but you needed to say this.

“You shouldn't have to do this, I'm so sorry”

“Cyare, I can stop if you don't want me to do this, I can let you finish yourself”

“No!” You said quickly, too quickly, “I mean-” You were floundering to find the right words but Rex just pressed a soft kiss to your temple.

“You don't need to say anything” He said gently and pushed deeper inside you, his cock now fully sheathed within you. You moaned gently at the sensation of the stretch, and it was music to his ears, “I'm going to fuck you now, and we can forget about it later okay?”

“Okay” You breathed out unsteadily.

He started to pick up the pace and it was heavenly. The feel of his cock dragging along your walls was divine, and if this was any other time it would have been perfect, but right now, you needed more.

“Rex, please-”

“Tell me Cyar'ika, what do you need?”

The underlying feelings that you already harboured for Rex were spilling into your words before you could stop them.

“Please, I need it harder, faster. Fuck me like you mean it Rex, please”

“Won't be a problem” He said breathily before he began pounding into you, and you could already feel the familiar coil tightening in the pit of your stomach, replacing any pain that once inhabited it. Rex slid his arm around you, arching your back so he could hit the deepest possible spot within you.

“Fuck” You hissed.

“That feel good?” He panted out, and you nodded hastily. Rex tutted slightly, “Use your words Mesh'la, tell me how it feels” He said, dragging his lips across your neck, leaving small markings behind as his teeth nipped at you.

“Fuck Rex, it feels so good. Please don't stop, I need you” You were whispering, as if it were a secret you didn't want to tell.

Rex groaned loudly, burying his face in your neck, “Say it again”

“Which part?” You said letting a small smirk onto your face at his reaction to your words. You knew exactly which ones he wanted to hear.

He looked up at you in disbelief of your teasing at this moment, then pressed his forehead into yours, slowing down his pace and making you whimper at the loss of intensity, “Tell me you need me”

You had no problem saying something as true as that. “I need you Rex, I want you” You emphasised, your eyes burning into his from a mere hairbreadth away.

He groaned, the distinction between the two phrases not lost on him. He quickly resumed his punishing pace, pulling away from you slightly to watch you. You felt the coil pull taught within you, just waiting to snap. You weren’t certain if the drug had something to do with it or not, but you had never been wound up to an orgasm so quickly by anyone else before.

“Stars, just like that” You moaned, eyes closing and head pushing back into the bunk.

“Fuck, look at you” Rex breathed out, “You’re so beautiful taking my cock like this”

The words hit you in the very centre of your being, and without thinking, you grabbed the back of Rex’s neck and pulled him in to your lips. His hips stuttered for one second, but then he was groaning into the kiss, his hips snapping to yours even harder, his fingers holding you down with bruising strength. You didn’t care at all. The idea of having his hands imprinted into your skin only sent you careering towards your orgasm.

“Rex I'm gonna-” You couldn’t even get the words out.

“That's it Mesh'la, let go, cum for me”

His words tipped you over the edge, the coil snapping suddenly and harshly, filling your system with intense pleasure. Rex wasn't far behind.

“Where-”

“Inside, please. I want to feel you Rex” You scraped your nails down the back of his neck as he rode you though your high.

“Kriff, you're going to be the death of me Cyar'ika” He mumbled, hooking his lips with yours as he snapped his hips to your one final time, spilling all of himself inside.

You both took a second to come down from your highs, breathing heavily against each others lips. The more your breath returned to normal, and the burning inside of your limbs subsided, the more the dread crept in.

Rex slid out of you without saying a word, without looking at you. You whimpered slightly at the loss and covered you mouth out of embarrassment. He left the room and your thoughts instantly spiralled out of control.

He’s never going to speak to me again. He’ll never look at me again. I’ve ruined everything. There’s no way we can just move on from this. I’m never going to be able to forget this. He’ll never look at me the same.

A moment later, Rex returned with a damp towel and knelt on the floor, placing a hand on your knee. “Open” He said gently, a kind smile across his lips as he guided your legs open to clean you up. You couldn’t look at him, opting to lay your head back and stare at the ship’s ceiling.

“Rex, I’m so sorry” You said quietly, tears pricking at the edges of your eyes.

“Don't be, I'm just glad I could help you” He replied, as sweet as he always was, and you felt the tears spill, running silently down the sides of your face.

Everything's ruined.

When he finished cleaning you up, Rex noticed your despondent expression and tear stained face and grabbed your hand tentatively.

“What are you thinking Mesh'la?” He asked, his deep voice exceedingly smooth.

“This isn't what I wanted, it shouldn't have been like this” You stared up blankly, blinking hot tears out of your eyes.

Rex's heart started beating faster, “Did I hurt you?”

“No!” You sat up, looking into his eyes, “It's not that it's-”

He brought a hand to cup your cheek and his thumb gently caressed your cheekbone, wiping some tears from under your eye, “It's what?”

You took a deep breath. Now felt like both the right and the wrong moment but you were past caring, your dignity was already laid outside in the bed of flowers that started this whole mess.

“I- I actually like you Rex, I might even love you, and now…” You looked down to your lap, shaking your head, “Now I've ruined everything. I'm just sorry” You buried your face in your hands, feeling ashamed of your actions, even if they weren’t entirely your own.

“Hey, hey” Rex pried your hands away from your face, “Cyar'ika look at me”

You raised your gaze to look into his eyes, your head still angled down as if it would stop the confrontation.

“You haven't ruined anything okay? Its not your fault, I-” He smiled a little, “I like you too, might even love you” He mimicked the way you had said it and your heart stopped.

“You do?” Your eyebrows pinched as you stared into his amber eyes, seeing only admiration and honesty swimming in their depths.

“Yes” He placed his hand on your cheek, “It's like I said, I didn't think it would happen like this”

“Oh, that's what you meant” You said plainly, and he chuckled at your expression.

“Yeah” He said, gently rubbing your thigh, “I'm sorry, I should've told you before all of this happened” He said, some kind of guilt creeping across his features.

“It’s okay” You took his face in your hands, “Thank you Rex, for helping me”

A smirk grew on his face, “Anytime”

Make It Feel Better

Tags :
6 months ago

we never quite made it

Tech x F!Reader

word count: 10k

We Never Quite Made It

description: after first meeting on kamino, you and tech seem to keep running into each other, without being able to fully indulge in each other's company. will you ever find the time to be able to tell each other of the feelings that have bloomed over the years?

warnings: not a happy ending!! death, torture (not in any great detail), blood & needles, some mentions of other medical stuff, tech brainrot I fear, don't wanna spoil it but... cx-2...

a/n: okay this was originally just gonna be a cute little fluffy thing and then I kinda went over board. it's a little more high-concept (which feels like a generous word for it) than my other oneshots but i'm pretty happy with how it turned out :) also anyone who writes tech fics regularly I salute you 🫡 it is truly not for the weak

We Never Quite Made It

22BBY, KAMINO

You waited patiently in the medical bay, lining up your various tools so none of them were out of place. You weren’t necessarily a neat freak, it was just something to occupy your hands. You were about to see your first patient since transferring from the hospital on Coruscant, to Kamino, in an effort to help the war effort.

The other medics around you weren’t new, and seemed a lot more relaxed, and sure of themselves. You had faith in your abilities as a medic, you had graduated from university into the job a number of years ago now, but somehow this felt like a lot more responsibility, looking after the men that fought for the Republic.

Your fingers were fidgeting at your sides when the door to the medical bay slid open, and a large group of clones were ushered inside by a Kaminoan. You were at the back of the room, so the clones from the front of the group were shown to the medics closest to them. As the group parted, you could see there were a group of clones in vastly different armour from their brothers, and your interest was certainly piqued.

You watched with intrigue as they got closer to you, and before you knew it, one of them was standing in front of you. You still felt nervous, but the timid look on the youthful face of this clone was enough to snap you into gear.

“Hello” You smiled at him sweetly, gesturing to the cot next to you, “Do you want to take a seat?”

The clone didn’t say anything, but obliged quickly. He was taller than many of the clones you worked on before, his hair a light auburn, and he wore goggles that were tinted a subtle yellow.

“What’s your name?” You asked politely.

“CT-9902, Ma’am”

The nervousness was evident in his voice, which you noted was different from the other clones, a more formal twinge and bite to the vowels.

“No need for all that Trooper, just my name is fine” You chuckled a little, tapping the name badge on your uniform, “and I asked for your name. What do your brothers call you?”

The clone looked to the name badge and then up to your eyes, “Tech”

“Well Tech, I understand that this is your last check-up before you graduate, is that right?”

“Uh, technically, we have already graduated. We are waiting to be deployed” He corrected you and you nodded.

”I understand” You smiled, “I’m just going to take some of your blood, if that’s okay”

“Of course it’s okay” He said matter-of-factly, “I wouldn’t expect anything less”

You had to suppress a smirk at his observation as you took the syringe from the tray, “It’s just what they ask us to say, bedside manner and all that”

“Ah” He replied, a blush tinging his ears pink, “My apologies”

It was hard not to find Tech adorable. He was so young and fresh-faced, somehow more so than the other recently graduated clones around the room. Perhaps it was the difference in facial structure, slightly pursed lips, or the big brown eyes that looked up at you though his goggles.

“No need” You waved off his apology, “It’s nice not to have to baby your patients really”

Tech nodded thoughtfully, and took of his left vambrace to allow you access to the correct vein, rolling up his sleeve. You raised an eyebrow at his actions.

“You had a lot of blood taken before?” You asked, and he looked at you puzzled.

“No” He replied simply, “Why?”

“I didn’t have to tell you where I was going to take it from” You gestured the syringe towards his now bare forearm.

“Ah, well” He looked down at himself and back up, “I am… a little knowledgeable about such things”

You smirked a little as you took his arm, keeping him talking while you placed the needle to his skin, “Knowledgeable huh? and why is that?”

He looked up at your face as you worked, wholly uninterested in the needle that was pressing into his arm, “I am interested in knowing about it”

You hummed slightly in reply, drawing the blood from the clone and placing the syringe down again.

“Just a few more things to check” You said, taking the small torch from your belt, “Would you mind taking off your goggles for just a moment?”

The clone didn’t hesitate, and pushed his goggles atop his head.

“Now, look straight ahead” You told him, and shined the light into his eye, checking to see if his pupils were dilating properly. At some point his eyes flicked up to yours, and you were surprised by the flurry of butterflies that filled your stomach. “Eyes ahead, Tech” You reminded him, and he righted himself straight away. You had to bite back your grin at his certainly interesting demeanour.

As you moved onto his other eye, you let your curiosity get the best of you, “If you don’t mind me asking, why are you and your brothers… a little different?”

“I do mind you asking actually” He said plainly, and you were unsure if you had actually upset him, if he was kidding, or if that was just how he spoke.

“Okay” You smiled graciously, choosing to just move on, “You can put your goggles back on now”

Tech watched you carefully as he pulled down and adjusted his goggles until they were comfortable again. With your pleasant smile, it seemed that you were just being sincere and inquisitive in asking about him and his brothers, and he felt a little silly for just brushing you off.

“We usually get seen by the Kaminoans” Tech noted, “Why are there civilian medics on Kamino now?”

“We volunteered” You shrugged with a small smile, “Could you lie down?”

Tech once again did as you said quickly, a little too quickly this time, hitting the back of his head on the cot that was not as comfortable as he had thought. You winced a little and his cheeks flushed immediately.

”Good thing I’m about to scan you” You joked, “Hopefully that didn’t do any damage”

Tech pointed his first finger up as he talked, “It is highly unlikely that I would sustain any dam-”

“I know Tech, I was just kidding” You interrupted, and he stuttered as he looked up at you standing over him with a gentle smile

“Right” He nodded, “Of course you do, my apologies”

”There’s no need to apologise” You smiled, pulling down the scanner over him “Stay still now”

You stepped back from the machine and picked up your datapad, reading over the information as the scanner picked it up. It scanned his identifying code in his wrist and your eyebrows raised at his profile. Defective, genetically enhanced intellect and cognitive functions.

“Is something wrong?” He questioned your reaction.

“No, you’re in perfect health in fact” You answered his question, pulling the machine away so he could sit up.

“What is the… matter, then?” He asked slightly hesitantly.

“The machine scanned your identifying code” You explained, unable to hold back your grin, “You sound like a very interesting individual indeed, Tech”

Tech blushed furiously, looking away and noting that his brothers were already finished with their examinations, huddled together watching him with the widest grins he had ever seen from them. He only blushed further upon seeing them, scowling and turning back to you. You just watched him with a look of vague amusement on your face.

“Well, you’re all good to go now” You informed him, and he stood quickly, accidently knocking the elbow of his armour against your hip.

He was mortified. “I am so very sorry” He spoke hurriedly, turning back towards you with wide eyes, gently holding onto your arm without even realising.

“It’s really alright” You replied with a chuckle, though it was a little strained.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you, that is the last thing I would mean to do” He continued, and you couldn’t help but find his reaction so effortlessly charming

“I like the way you speak, Tech” You smiled, genuine happiness just taking over your face.

Tech didn’t think it was possible for his face to heat up even more, but he had to clutch at the edge of his blacks and pull them away from his neck so it didn’t feel like he was over heating. He didn’t know what to say at all. He couldn’t think of the last time he had ever been complimented by someone, let alone someone as pretty as you. He willed himself to get a grip, knowing he was just giving in to his body in allowing those kind of thoughts to fester, and he cleared his throat.

“Well, it was a pleasure to meet you” He added your name with an emphasis, as if it was to help him remember it, “If I weren’t about to leave I would ask you to explain the functionality of this machine you’ve just used on me”

“Maybe another time?”

Tech nodded, “Another time”

“Goodbye Tech” You smiled at him warmly, “It was a pleasure to meet you too”

Tech nodded and turned to leave, making a beeline for his brothers, who welcomed him by teasing him mercilessly, the largest of the bunch ruffling his auburn curls. You watched them leave, and caught Tech looking back at you as he exited the room.

21BBY, KAMINO

“New orders”

Before you could realise, a datapad was being thrown at you. Luckily you got your hands around it before it dropped to the floor. You looked over the screen, then up at the other medic.

“We're not trained for that” You implored.

“The GAR is running low on medics, they asked for some of us to fill the roles for now” They replied with a shrug, “It's probably more interesting than being here anyway”

You could agree with that.

“What squad are you with?” The other medic asked, and you looked back down, tapping on your name.

“Clone Force 99” You informed them. The name rung a bell from somewhere…

“Never heard of them” The medic replied, “Guess you'll find out tomorrow”

We Never Quite Made It

Having stayed up late investigating the group of clones you were instructed to be joining, it was no wonder that you were bouncing on your toes with a beaming smile as their ship came hurtling into the hangar. You were impressed by their success rate, not falling short of perfect, but it was from realising exactly who was a part of this team that made you so eager.

You would be lying to say you hadn't thought of Tech a few times since first meeting him. With him being your first patient here on Kamino, it was hard not to compare the other clones to him, and while you had no issue with the other clones, you had not enjoyed your time with them as much as that first encounter.

The ship was set down on the ground, and soon the small batch of clones emerged from inside, looking particularly disinterested, and your smile faltered. They huddled together outside, talking amongst themselves, some of them leaning on the side of the ship.

You walked over slowly, feeling a little more hesitant than you had initially been. You couldn't see Tech, as he was behind his brothers, but you recognised the rest of them by their differing appearances.

You cleared your throat, gaining the attention of the clones, and offering them a small smile. They turned to look at you, apart from Tech who's face was buried in a datapad.

“Hello, I think I've been assigned to your squad” You spoke, and that's when Tech's head snapped up, his eyes meeting yours.

He looked a bit older than the last time you had seen him. His face seemed slimmer, his cheekbones slightly more hollowed out and defined, his jaw strong, but his widened eyes had the memorable sparkle in them all the same.

“We don't need you here” One of the others said, earning a elbow in the ribs as you looked up at him.

“Shut up Cross” The elbow-er hissed quietly at the elbow-ee, “Ignore him, it's nice to meet you…”

You told the man your name.

“Well, I'm Hunter” He introduced himself, and you gave him a nod of acknowledgement.

Crosshair rolled his eyes, “Why are we being made to have a medic?”

“I'm not sure” You shrugged, “I wasn't really told all too much about it”

Crosshair seemed almost pleased that you were just in the dark as them, then grunted, pushing his way past you and onto the ship.

Hunter huffed, noting your slightly offended expression, “Sorry about Crosshair, he's in a mood. We just weren't… expecting this, is all”

You chewed the inside of your cheek, “Me neither”

“Well anyway, let's get going” He walked up the ship's steps.

“I'm Wrecker” The large clone introduced himself with a warm smile, which you were inclined to return.

You held out your hand to him, and he took it with a crushing strength. “Nice to meet you… Wrecker” You managed to peep out despite the force of his grip.

Wrecker followed his commanding officer up the stairs afterwards, and you were about to follow after, but realised Tech was still stood firmly in his place. You looked back at him and he was still staring at you.

“You coming Tech?”

His eyes went a little wider.

“You know who I am?” He said, his voice holding a clear tone of surprise, though it was nowhere near as timid as it had been the last time you saw him.

Your cheeks flushed a little, embarrassed that he had clearly made more of an impression on you than you had on him.

“Oh, you don't remember meeting?” You asked, keeping your voice even.

“No, no, I remember” He confirmed, “I just didn't think you would remember me”

You gave him a puzzled look, a smile growing on your face, “Of course I remember you”

“Can you two wrap it up, we're leaving” Crosshair shouted from inside, and you chuckled slightly nervously, walking up the ramp.

Tech was still frozen in place for a moment. He hadn't been excited to be getting a medic, having ample training and knowledge of the subject himself, but now, he couldn't help but feel a little exhilarated that it was you that would be joining them.

The few times that the squad had been back to Kamino since graduation, Tech had found himself wandering down to the medical bay. He hadn't talked to you, he was far too nervous to do that, but he had watched you work through the little window in the door. You had almost caught him one time, and that's when he decided to stop doing it, realising how strange he was behaving.

He walked up the stairs of the Marauder, a little on edge, a little nervous, but a little more happy than he had been when they landed.

21BBY, MARAUDER

Tech was staring. At you, to be specific. Once again.

His brain worked at a klick a minute, and yet, whatever you had just said to him had him stumped. His mouth hung open a little, his eyes slightly narrowed and his brow furrowed deeply. He wasn't saying anything. For once, nothing was going on in his head. It was like his brain had frozen, unable to process any new thoughts. He was confused.

“Tech?” You said hesitantly, drawing him from his stupor.

“I'm sorry, I don't think I heard you correctly” He replied assuredly.

You hesitated a little before asking again, “I asked you if you think I should leave”

That's what he thought you'd said.

“I don’t understand your meaning” He dropped the tool from his hand and stood up, facing you and trying to read every movement you made.

You felt a little uneasy under his scrutiny, but continued nonetheless, “Like… leave the team”

Tech still couldn't understand.

“Why are you asking me this?” He asked, his brow furrowing even deeper.

“Well, I figured you would give me an honest answer” You shrugged. Tech was nothing if not upfront, and it was one of the many things you liked about him.

“No, I mean… why are you asking this at all?” He surveyed your reaction to his words, your throat constricting as you swallowed and subtly wiped you hands on your trousers.

“Uh… I suppose I don't feel that my presence is very necessary”

“I don't see how you could possibly think that” Tech replied, “You have a very useful skillset”

“Well, I know that Hunter doesn't exactly love having me around, and Crosshair even less so” You argued, “And my ‘useful skillset’ hardly gets used around here”

Tech didn't know what to say. There was something nagging at him from the depths of his consciousness, urging him to tell you to stay. He found you exceedingly interesting, and enjoyed hearing about your medical exploits from before joining their squad. He always asked under the guise of learning new information, but his brothers all understood, far more than him, that it wasn't just knowledge that kept him asking you questions.

At this point, you had been with the Bad Batch for a few months, and - as you were explaining to Tech - you had not felt very useful at all. They rarely got injured, but even when they did, they would mostly refuse your help. Particularly Hunter. Crosshair had not warmed to you at all, though Wrecker did seem to enjoy your company. Tech was kind, in his own way. He always listened to you attentively, and as both of you were reasonably light sleepers, you had often found yourselves staying up together between missions, talking about a great many things. He seemed interested to know about medical procedures, but expanding his knowledge was only making you more and more obsolete within the group.

“I'm sorry if we've made you feel unwelcome” He said, and your gaze softened a little.

“It's okay, I know none of you really wanted me here in the first place”

“That’s…” Tech tried to find the words, “I would not say that is entirely factual. Though if you would like to leave, I think you should”

You couldn’t help but feel a little disheartened by Tech’s words, but you did come to him for the truth after all, you couldn’t be mad now.

“Alright, I'll notify the medical team back on Kamino then”

You walked away from Tech, and his brain began working, screaming at him to ask you to stay. He pressed his lips into a hard line, trying to come up with something, anything that he could say to make you stay, but all of the possibilities floating around in his head were jumbled and he couldn’t make sense of anything. He shook his head, trying to focus himself, but you had already walked away, already set on leaving.

We Never Quite Made It

“Get away from me”

You were crouched over Crosshair’s crumpled form, who was bent over and holding the wound to his side in the co-pilot's chair of the Marauder.

“Crosshair, I'm only trying to help” You insisted, trying to tend to him.

“I don't need your kriffing help, back off” He hissed, snatching the medkit from you.

You sighed deeply, taking a step back, “You know this is the reason I'm here right? To help when things like this happen?”

“We don't need you!” He shouted, “We never wanted you here, and we certainly don't now”

“Crosshair, calm down” Hunter scolded lightly, and when you turned to him you could see the look on his face, where you knew he agreed with his brother but was holding his tongue.

“Well good for you, I'll be gone soon” You mumbled as you stormed away, your eyes welling up instinctively from someone raising their voice at you.

You felt entirely useless.

You became a medic because you wanted to help people, and you joined the GAR medic team because you wanted to help clones specifically, but here you were, surrounded by clones, and they didnt want your help. It was hard not to feel downcast about it.

You understood Crosshair's contempt to a certain level, but did he really have to be so mean?

Tech could hear your soft sobs from outside the door to the cargo hold. He knocked firmly, and heard you sniff before telling him to enter.

When he saw the rosy tint of your nose and cheeks and the tears running down them, he realised that he had no idea how to comfort you in this moment. He stared at you as you stared up at him, waiting for him to say something.

“I'm sorry” He said unsurely, and you gave him a sad smile.

“It's fine Tech”

“I don't really think it is ‘fine’. I am very unimpressed with the way my brothers have behaved towards you” He asserted.

Looking down at you, your knees tucked into your chest and biting into your bottom lip to stop it quivering, he was reminded that he really didn't want you to leave, and even further, he realised the true reason why. He finally mustered up the courage to ask you to stay.

“I know that you're not happy at the moment, being with this team. I… I wish it were different, I wish we could have made you more comfortable. I am sure that if you stayed for a little longer and I talked to my brothers that-”

“I've heard from Kamino already, they want me back” You said softly, cutting him off before he could even say it.

“Ah, I see” He paused, then turned away “I shall leave you to-”

“Tech”

He turned back to you, and you offered him a soft, genuine smile, “I appreciate it, thank you”

He just nodded to you and left, the nasty feeling of rejection gnawing at his brain.

We Never Quite Made It

As the Marauder touched down in the hangar on Kamino, there was the most unpleasant sensation stirring in your gut. This was the right choice, you didn't fit in here, and you wanted to actually make a difference. Despite knowing all this, you couldn't help but feel strange, and descending the ship’s stairs felt like regressing, going backwards instead of forwards.

You turned to look at the clones as you left. Each of them, apart from Crosshair, gave a nod and a goodbye and walked back inside. Aside from Tech, of course.

He followed you down the steps, and it was the look on his face that placed that feeling in your gut. It was the reluctancy to leave behind this man that you had grown so fond of over the past few months, this man who listened to you and made you feel wanted despite the rest of the squad's insistency to not.

It had only been a few months, but you realised that you had grown very close with the clone before you, and your heart ached. You realised the depth of the feelings you harboured for him, that it was something you had never felt for another.

“I'll miss you Tech, it's been nice getting to know you” You spoke honestly, realising this could be the last time you saw him.

Tech sighed almost imperceptibly, “I agree, I shall miss… learning about medical procedures from you”

You couldn't help but laugh, “Well next time you're on Kamino, swing by the medical bay and I'll be happy to answer your questions”

“Are you making fun of me?” Tech suddenly resembled the shy cadet that you had met the first time.

“No” You smiled, “I'd always be happy to talk to you”

Tech didn't know what the correct thing to say was, so he said nothing. He just stared at you, once again, his mind fighting for anything to say once more. There was nobody that could send his mind spiralling like you did, and it seemed that you didn't even try to.

You smiled despite his slightly awkward silence, and stepped forwards, raising to your toes to plant a soft kiss to his cheek, “Goodbye Tech”

Tech could feel his face burning, from the blush that overtook him, and the feeling of your lips searing into his skin, rendering him completely speechless. As you walked away, he brought a hand to his face where you had kissed him and traced the area with his finger lightly.

“Ugh, I'm going to throw up” Crosshair asserted from the doorway of the ship.

“Shhhh” Wrecker pushed him and watched Tech swoon over you with a large grin.

Tech paid them no mind. He just watched you leave, a mix of emotions overtaking him. A frown settled on his face as your figure disappeared into the facility, but the feel of your lips on his cheek brought a warm feeling to his chest.

19BBY, ANAXES

“Hey Baar'ur'ika!” You heard the unmistakable voice of Jesse call out to you as he jogged over to the medbay in the Anaxes base.

“He doesn't call me that you know” Kix asserted from beside you, and you chuckled.

“Do you want him to?” You asked earnestly, but with an amused twinkle in your eye.

“That's besides the point" He grumbled, earning another laugh from you.

“Me and Kix are being sent on a mission with the Captain” Jesse said as he came to a stop in front of you.

“We are?” Kix asked

Jesse nodded, “Some special squad is joining us apparently”

“Special?”

“Yeah, I'm not sure why though, you wanna come find out?” He grinned, gesturing his head towards the landing strip.

“Can't. I've got all these reports to sign off” You sighed, holding up your stack of flimsi.

“Alright, we'll see you later on then Baar'ur'ika” Jesse smiled, ruffling your hair.

You huffed, putting the lose strands of it back into place, “See you later”

You took up your stylus again, clicking it absentmindedly as you read over the reports.

You had been reassigned to the 501st only a few weeks after leaving clone force 99, and you fit in so much better here. It seemed that the clones of the 501st actually wanted to get along with you, and they always included you in their shenanigans, reluctantly on your end. You got along with all of them really well, but Kix and Jesse were the ones you were closest with. You worked most closely with Kix, so that was only natural, but Jesse was certainly the most friendly to you from the outset.

You came across a report with an error, and checked the next piece of flimsi, and the same error had been made. You then leafed through all of the pages and realised the error had been made on every single one of them, and you groaned loudly. It then occurred to you that maybe you were the one making the error, and so you grabbed the stack of pages, rushing out the door to try and grab Kix before he left for his mission.

Luckily when you got to the landing strip, him and Jesse were still standing there with the Captain. You rushed over to them, almost dropping a page on the way.

“Kix, can I just ask you about something” You spoke, and the huddle of clones turned to look at you.

“Ah Baar'ur'ika, you came to investigate after all” Jesse slung an arm around your shoulders with a grin.

“I didn't come to investigate, I-”

Your voice seemingly stopped working as you turned your head and locked eyes with the specific ones that had always managed to draw you in and leave you speechless. Those wonderful brown eyes that always widened when they met yours

“Tech” You couldn't hold back the smile that grew on your face.

Tech spoke your name, and Jesse stifled a laugh when he felt a shiver run up your back.

You were absolutely mesmerised by the man in front of you. It had been just over a year since you had seen him, and in that time it seemed that he had only got even more beautiful. Your heart felt as if it had been set alight, the emotions that accompanied seeing Tech returning as if you had only said goodbye to him yesterday.

“We're here too” Wrecker laughed, snapping your gaze away from the spectacled clone.

“Hey Wrecker” You grinned, and he gave you a wink in return.

“Hey Hunter, Crosshair” You addressed the last two clones.

“Hey, it's good to see you” Hunter replied, a small genuine smile directed towards you.

Crosshair didn't say anything, but you hadn't expected him to.

“You know these guys?” Jesse asked, squeezing your shoulder.

“Uh, yeah. I was with them for a little while” You replied, looking to the floor for a moment before realising why you were here. “Oh! Kix, I just need to ask about this”

Tech watched you talking with the other medic and flipping through the pieces of flimsi as everyone else fell back into their previous conversation. His eyes lingered on the arm slung around your shoulders, and the way you placed your own hand on the shoulder of the other clone. You were clearly comfortable around these clones, and Tech's jealousy fizzled away to a form of sadness as he realised that you were so much happier with these clones than you had been with them. With him.

You settled the matter with Kix, and turned towards Tech once more, stepping forward so you stood in front of him.

“How are you?” You asked, clasping your hands behind your back.

“I am well” Tech replied flatly, not giving away an inch of the emotions that swirled within him, “How about yourself?”

“I'm good yeah” You smiled, “I've been here for a few rotations”

“With the 501st?” Tech asked.

“Oh no, just on Anaxes, I've been with these guys since… well, a couple weeks after I left you”

Something about the sentence pulled at Tech's heart. These clones were so lucky. They had got to spend all of this time by your side, all this time that he had spent with you only as a memory in his head, your absence taunting him constantly.

“I- Uh- I am glad to see you are doing well, you seem… happier, than last I saw you” He observed, pulling a small laugh from you.

“Maybe a bit. I do miss having someone to rant to though” You smirked a little at him, and despite his heated cheeks, he returned the gesture.

“I don't know that I'd call it ‘ranting’, you were always very precise with your words, very… intentional” He complimented you in a way that only made sense to both of you.

You hummed in response, “Well how's this for intentional - I've missed you Tech”

Tech couldn't hold back the small contented sigh that escaped him.

“I have missed you too” He admitted, indulging in losing himself in your eyes, inspecting ever fleck of colour.

“Hey Tech! We've gotta get going” Hunter shouted over to him. Neither one if you had realised the others had moved away.

Tech scowled inwardly, turning his attention back to you, “I was… I should like to ask you about biopsy methods, I am unsure of safe practice”

“Maybe another time?” You asked hopefully.

He nodded, a small smile quirking the edges of his lips, “Another time”

In a bout of confidence and rising adrenaline, Tech found himself leaning down and pressing a short kiss to your cheek, as you had done to him last time. Your mouth hung open a little as he then immediately walked off and joined his brothers on the gunship, surprised that he had actually done such a thing.

“Bye Baar'ur'ika” Jesse called teasingly, and you were snapped from your daze.

“Bye di'kut” You called, rolling your eyes as you clutched your flimsi close to your chest.

Tech's eyes locked with yours as the doors to the gunship closed, and it made your chest ache. You could still feel the warmth of his breath, the gentle scratch of his stubble, the softness of his lips. It was all too much and not enough, and watching him leave hurt more than you thought it would.

18BBY, CORUSCANT

You sat at your makeshift desk, your head in your hand and flicking through your datapad to survey the latest news. Things certainly had become bleak since the rise of the Empire.

You heard your name called, and your head snapped up to meet the golden eyes of Senator Chuchi.

“Senator, what can I do for you?” You asked, sitting up straight.

“Please, it's Riyo, and it's more what I can do for you” She said with a small smirk lifting the edges of her lips.

“Oh” You said, your eyebrows drawing together in confusion, “What do you mean?”

“There's a new clone joining us, I believe you know him” She replied, her smirk growing.

You immediately stood from your seat, “Is it who I think it is?”

“Perhaps” The Senator shrugged coyly.

You couldn't hold back your grin, “Where is he?”

“Just in the hangar” She nodded in the direction.

“Thank you Sen- Riyo” You said quickly, rushing from behind your desk towards the hangar.

You had known that Echo was alive, but this was the first time you would actually be seeing him since before the mission to the citadel where he had been presumed dead, and boy was he a sight for sore eyes.

“Echo!” You exclaimed excitedly, drawing the attention of the clone as you ran towards him across the hangar.

The clone's eyes lit up as he took in the sight of you, and stepped forwards, taking you in a tight hug when you crashed into him.

“It's good to see you” He said with a smile as he pulled away.

“It's even better to see you” You grinned, “I was so upset I didn't get to see you after you were rescued”

“I heard” He smirked, looking over his shoulder at Rex.

You looked over at the blonde clone too, and saw that he was watching on with three other familiar clones.

“Woah” You couldn't stop yourself from saying, “I heard you were hanging around with this lot nowadays”

Once your eyes found Tech, you couldn't bring yourself to look away. He seemed to be hanging back a bit, his eyes once again a little wide behind his goggles.

“Hey!” Wrecker said excitedly, earning a small laugh from you.

“Hey Wrecker, hey Hunter” You smiled at the clones.

“Hi” The Sergeant smiled at you.

Wrecker then pushed Tech forwards, and you smirked a little as he glared at his larger brother.

“Hey Tech, how's it going?” You asked, and he brought his eyes back to you.

In a way he couldn't define, you seemed more mature than when he had last saw you. Perhaps it was the tiredness he saw in your eyes, or perhaps it was the few small scars that adorned your skin, clearly earned in battle. The thought of you sustaining injuries made his stomach lurch, so he tried not to think of it.

The way you were looking at him was so familiar. Your smile was kind and easy, gracing your features in a way that was so uniquely you. The light crinkle around your eyes and lips, the small glint in your eye, the way one side of your mouth was more contorted than the other. Tech was certainly glad to see you.

“Uh… it is going well” Tech replied unsurely after a moment, and you smirked a little bit at his answer.

It was intoxicating to be in Tech's presence once more. Everytime you were around him, things felt a little different, like there was something in the air that made everyone else look a bit more fuzzy as he was brought into focus. It didn't ever help that he was seemingly always getting so much more handsome every time you saw him.

His auburn locks were a little longer at the moment, no doubt because his biggest priority whilst on the run from the Empire was not his hair, but you weren't complaining. His hair framed his angelic face so perfectly, his features undeniably sharper and more mature, though his eyes were still as soft and gentle as they had always been, with a startling youthfulness that he couldn't seem to shake.

“It's good to see you guys, I'm glad to see you're not… with the Empire” You said a little hesitantly, then noticed the small blonde girl that was hiding behind Hunter.

He noticed you looking at her and introduced her to you.

“It's nice to meet you Omega” You smiled, kneeling down to get on her level.

“It's nice to meet you too, though I have already heard of you since Tech talks about you a lot” She said matter-of-factly.

“Is that right?” You smirked, looking up at Tech, whose cheeks were positively burning.

“I think I may have mentioned your existence a few times” He spoke flatly, but the edge of squeakiness gave him away.

The idea of Tech talking about you, or even just casually mentioning your existence in a passing comment, was enough to set your heart alight. In whatever manner it had truly been, he had at least always remembered you in some way, and that brought the smile to your face.

Hunter then said goodbye to you, and then to Echo, and retreated to the ship. Tech did the same, but instead walked towards you, stopping just in front of you. You had to crane your neck a little to look up at him in the pleasantly close quarters. Had he always been this tall?

“I-” He just looked at you for a while, and you smiled at him, waiting patiently for him to continue. “I have many questions to ask you” He finished.

You chuckled, “Maybe another time?”

Tech couldn't help but sigh, the familiar words making his heart ache, “Another time, yes”

“I think I owe you something now” You said with a small grin, trying to ease the light crease in his brow.

Tech watched your expression change cautiously, “Owe me? I don't think so”

“I mean, if you don't want it then-”

“Well, I must admit, I am curious now”

You laughed at his interjection, smiling at him fondly, “Alright, here you go then”

You placed a hand on his cheek and brought your lips to the other one, placing a lingering kiss to his cheekbone. Tech closed his eyes at the bittersweet feeling of it, and opened them to look back into yours. He placed his own hand to your cheek before the moment could end, and gently rubbed his thumb back and forth, his eyes searching yours. He took a quick glance over your shoulder and saw his brothers all watching him, waiting for him so they could leave, and he chewed the corner of his lip a little as he looked back to you.

“One of these days, I'll give you a proper kiss” He said quietly, making your heart skip a beat, “If you'd like that”

“I'd like that very much” You replied quickly, the grin on your face only growing.

Tech cracked his own small smile. “Another time then” He whispered, and looked over your features for a second longer, before placing a soft kiss to your forehead and walking away.

You watched him leave with an undeniable fondness swelling in your heart. You had felt a certain affection for Tech from the very beginning, and the thrill of the idea of him returning the feelings that you harboured for him brought forth the newfound nature of said feelings.

It went deeper than just liking him in a special way. This emotion you felt when you looked at him, or when you thought of him, was different. The way your heart stopped when he looked at you, the way your breath hitched when he spoke your name, you knew it was different. This was far more profound than a silly crush. The longevity of your affections had caused them to develop into something deeper, more serious.

Something like love.

17BBY, REBELLION BASE

“I need to talk to you”

You looked up from cleaning your workstation and saw Echo striding towards you, determination in his eyes that seemed otherwise tired and possibly even sad.

“What's the matter?” You asked, rushing over to meet him in the middle.

He opened his mouth, trying to find the words, but finding them hard to say, to admit even to himself.

“I… was just on a mission with the batch” He started.

“Oh how are they? How's Tech?” You ask, your mood lifted just a little.

Echo's heart ached, his eyebrows pinching together as his lips formed a hard line. His eyes began to well up slightly and he blinked a few times to rid himself of the tears.

“I'm so sorry” He whispered.

“Why are you sorry?” You asked cautiously.

“Tech… He-” Echo swallowed, “He didn't make it, he fell”

The words hit directly into your heart, and you could almost feel it collapse in on itself.

“Wh- What?” You whimpered out, almost hoping that you had heard him wrong, or that it was just a cruel joke of some kind.

“He… He sacrificed himself for the squad, so that they could live”

You couldn't say anything, couldn't breathe, couldn't move, couldn't think. The only thing you could do, was let the feeling of everything crashing down wash over you. It truly felt as if the hinges of your life, the certain something that seemingly held it up, had come loose.

You heard Echo say your name, but it was distant, like he was in another room. Your knees slowly gave in, and he grabbed you as you fell to the ground. He held you in his arms as you cried silently, your tears soaking through his clothes. He stroked your hair comfortingly, whispering assurances about how it was going to be fine, that everything would be alright.

“I never got to tell him, Echo” You choked out eventually, cutting through his smooth words.

“Tell him what?” He asked tenderly, knowing all too well what it was.

“That I… love him” You said, and a small sob finally escaped you.

Somehow it felt even harder to admit now that he was gone. Your love didn't feel as if it was in the past tense. It felt present, current, and that's why the sudden grief stung so much - the love was still lingering, and it didn't feel as if it was planning on leaving anytime soon. After all, it had managed to survive not seeing him for long periods of time, and to your broken heart, it felt the same.

17BBY, IMPERIAL PRISION

You surfaced slowly into consciousness, your eyes trying to open, but to no avail. You could feel your wrists caught in restraints, held above you on either side of your head. You tried to remember what had happened, but everything was fuzzy. You were… at the base. The Bad Batch were there, then… You were attacked? You were running with… Howzer? and then…

You couldn't recall anything past that point, but when your eyes finally opened you had a little idea of what could have happened. Sat opposite you with their arms crossed, was a man dressed head to toe in black armour, like the operative that Rex had captured before the attack on the base. He began talking, but it wasn't initially intelligible.

You shook your head to try and clear the brain fog a little, “Wha-”

“Tell me where the girl is” He demanded. The sound of his voice was so eerily familiar, but it was heavily modified by his helmet.

“Girl?” You questioned through your delirious state, turning your wrists in their restraints. Naturally, you knew who he was talking about, but you weren't going to give up that easily.

“Omega. I saw you talking with her, I know you know her and her brothers. Now, tell me, where would they have taken her?”

You pressed your mouth into a hard line, you could hardly deny it if he had seen you. “I won't talk”

He sighed, standing up and walking over so he stood in front of you, “I don't need to hurt you…” He said your name, and a chill ran up your spine. How could he know your name?

“That's not my name” You narrowed your eyes, looking into his visor.

“You cannot lie to me, Cyare” He spoke, and ran a hand over your cheek, “It would serve you well to tell the truth, it would be a shame to have to ruin this pretty face”

You looked over the man's appearance, for any semblance of individuality, but there was nothing.

“Who are you?” You asked.

“No one that concerns you anymore” The man chuckled, stepping back from you, “Now, tell me, what has become of the defective clones?”

You clenched your jaw in defiance, refusing to spill anything without even a little bit if incentive. You were clearly in some kind of imperial facility, but you weren't in any immediate danger, so you would stay stubborn for as long as you could.

The man spoke your name in a warning tone, his head tilted to the side, “I need you to tell me”

“I wont tell you anything” You spat back at him. He was irritatingly calm and collected, something you had not experienced from the Empire before.

He folded his hands behind his back, humming thoughtfully, “You will. Perhaps, another time”

With that, he turned and pressed the button on the door panel to leave.

You let your head hang down again, letting out a deep breath. If you weren't so tired you were sure that you'd be more panicked, but as your eyes closed and you let the exhaustion take over, you couldn't find it in yourself to be scared. Your body ached, and you needed it to rest if you wanted any chance of getting out of here.

We Never Quite Made It

The mysterious operative returned often over the next few days, pushing for answers but always leaving empty handed. He would always threaten violence, but had not touched you once since caressing your face in that first encounter.

He was now stood opposite you as he always was, making another empty threat about how you would be hurt if you didn't answer him.

You rolled your eyes, “Are you ever going to hold true to that promise?”

He stayed silent, and you laughed a little.

“Come on, I dare you, hurt me” You urged, jutting your chin out.

You were so tired of this, and he was obviously worn out by your defiance as well.

“I told you” He spoke quietly, “The last thing I would ever mean to do is hurt you”

Your heart stopped, and your eyes went wide as the familiar voice finally placed itself, hearing the same words that it had said all those years ago.

“It can't be, you-”

The man reached up and took off his helmet with a short hiss. He looked different, his face scarred and weary, his goggles nowhere to be seen, but it was undeniably him. The only thing that could have convinced you otherwise was the fact that his eyes didn't have the youthful sparkle they always seemed to in the past. Instead, they looked tired, completely worn down, and cold.

“Tech” You whispered, your heart beating impossibly fast in your chest.

He stepped closer, “I do not go by that name anymore”

On instinct, your eyes began to water, and a single tear ran down your cheek, “What are you doing here? You- You're with the Empire?”

He didn't reply, but he took off a glove and brought his hand to your face to wipe your tear away. You closed your eyes, and he let his hand remain on your cheek, rubbing your cheekbone lightly.

“I need you to tell me what I want to know” He spoke so softly now, and you opened your eyes and look up into his. They were still so inviting despite their unfamiliar coldness.

“Tech, why are you doing this?”

He didn't reply again, but brought his other hand to your cheek and held your face gently, his own just in front of yours, “Tell me”

“I can't” You choked out, brow furrowed as he ignored your questions.

“Please, Cyare. They will hurt you if you don't talk”

“Let them” You said firmly, tugging your face from his hands, “I won't betray your brothers”

Tech just watched you for a moment before opening his mouth again.

“So be it”

He put his helmet back on and left the room, leaving you alone with the revelation that the man you had been in love with was not only alive, but under the control of the Empire, the very thing you had dedicated your life to defeating.

We Never Quite Made It

The following day, when you lifted your head to see Tech enter your cell, he was now joined by an Imperial officer, and a floating droid that had a thin needle protruding from it. You understood all too well what this droid was, what it was used for, and you pulled at your restraints, a string of grunts escaping your lips.

“Resisting will do you no good” The Imperial officer chuckled, standing before you as the droid positioned itself to your left.

Tech couldn't watch. He kept his head up, appearing to be looking straight through you, but he had to close his eyes. Your screams were enough. You were resisting at every turn, and Tech just wished you would relent so that he wouldn't have to listen to the awful sounds that escaped you. The sounds that cut deep through his conditioning and hit his very soul, causing his chest to ache.

“Please, Tech. Make them stop” You cried hopelessly, and he squeezed his eyes closed even further, trying to block everything out.

To you, he looked cold, unmoving, and even after the Imperial had left with the droid as you had not let anything slip, he didn't budge at all.

After a few minutes of quiet, the only sound that was heard being your heavy breathing, he stepped forwards, taking off his helmet and letting it drop to the floor. He reached up and let you down from your restraints, catching your body as it fell down, limp with exhaustion. He knelt on the floor, his hand on the back of your head as it rested in his lap.

Your eyes fluttered open to see his face. He looked undeniably remorseful, and his eyes had a little amount of that special spark that they used to. You reached up and touched his face, causing his eyes to close with a shaky breath.

“What have they done to you Tech?” You whispered, your throat raw from shouting.

He didn't speak, but his heart clenched in his chest, every word you spoke bringing him further from the conditioning he had been subjected to to make him the way he was.

“How you could you let them do this to your brothers? To me? Do you not care about me at all?”

His eyes were now glassy when he opened them and looked down at you. He leant down and brought his forehead to yours, “I care for you more than you know”

Your tears were streaming down your face, “Then why are you doing this?”

Looking so deeply into your teary eyes, something in him finally snapped. He had a moment of intense clarity, fighting through his conditioning and realising the severity of his actions, of who he now was, who he had been forced to become.

He helped you stand before tying you back up in your restraints, much to your confusion.

You were sobbing now, your body and mind heavy with exhaustion, “Tech, please. Please stop this”

“I will come back for you, Cyare” He whispered, bringing his forehead back to yours with a hand on the back of your head, “I will get you out of here, I promise”

He stepped back, and was about to put his helmet back on, but he looked up to you once more.

“I am so very sorry”

You saw a tear slip from his eye, and he then placed his helmet on his head, leaving you alone once more.

We Never Quite Made It

Holding true to his promise, Tech returned that night. He unclipped your restraints, and you crumbled to your knees.

“Come on Cyar'ika, I'm going to get you out of here” He said gently, helping you to stand.

You tried to get a good footing, but your legs were too weak, and you fell into him. Without needing to be told, he picked you up, slinging an arm behind your back and the other under your knees. You rested your hands on his chest, looking up at his helmeted face and feeling unsure about his motivations. You were too tired to inquire though, so you just leaned your head against his shoulder and let him take you wherever he was going.

Tech carried you through the corridors of the prison, looking around corners and making sure to take the route where there would be the least guards. He constantly made sure you were still with him, as you kept slipping in and out of consciousness, so he'd place his fingers against your pulse point.

He slammed his hand into the door panel, and entered the elevator that would take you to the surface. The doors slid closed and he looked down at you, and behind his mask, he couldn't help but smile.

You looked so peaceful, so calm, so… beautiful.

For the first time, he let himself think of the future. He would get you out of here, and then he'd be free to think about his future. Maybe he'd re-join his brothers on Pabu, maybe… you would come with him. He hoped you could forgive him for the mistakes he'd made.

The doors opened, and Tech stepped out, pacing quickly across the landing platform to the nearest ship. Before he could make it there though, a bright light was shone on the pair of you from above.

“Trooper, put the prisoner down” A voice spoke through a loudspeaker, and he held you tightly in defiance.

He continued towards the transport, but was stopped in his place as blaster fire ripped through the air. His leg gave way as one of the shots grazed him, and he collapsed onto his knee, keeping you close to his chest so you wouldn’t hit the ground. He heard you let out a strangled gasp, and his heart sunk to his feet.

He pulled back from you, and sure enough, a blaster bolt had ripped straight into your chest.

He began panicking instantly, his breath quick and ragged, his heart stuttering and beating at an uneven pace. He let you rest in his lap, looking up to him through half lidded eyes that told him what he already knew to be true.

“No” He said assuredly, “You’re fine, you’re okay”

“Tech” You whispered.

“Everything will be fine” He bit into his bottom lip, completely in denial of what was happening.

“Tech” You said more firmly, though your voice was croaky, “It’s okay”

“It is not okay!” He exclaimed, tears spilling from his eyes that had quickly welled up.

He just watched you in disbelief, now unable to control the sobs that left his mouth. He had never cried so hard at anything in his life, but right now it felt as if everything was ending when it had only barely just begun.

“I'm so sorry Cyare, for everything” He whispered, his heart aching when you gave him a half-hearted smile.

“I know Tech, I know” You said breathlessly, the feeling of the blaster bolt to your heart ripping any strength from you.

Tech held your body close to him as the life slipped from you.

“It shouldn't have been like this, I should've protected you” He sobbed into your chest.

You pulled his head back and hooked your fingers under the edge of his helmet, taking it off his head so you could look into his eyes. You placed your hand on the side of his scarred cheek, and he leaned into it savouring your warm touch while he still could.

“It's okay Tech, I forgive you”

He didn't even think, he didn’t want to. Instead he just brought his lips to yours, the salty taste of his tears finding your tongue. The kiss was perfect, yet so bittersweet. It was something you had both waited years for, but now it would be one of the last moments you would ever share together. Tech kissed you so fervently, pouring every inch of his being into you, connecting his soul to yours, and in return you gave everything you had, even as it was slipping away.

He didn’t want it to end, and neither did you, but you knew your time was limited, and you had something you needed to say. You had thought that you had missed your chance before, and you’d be damned if you missed it now, in your final moments.

“Tech” You whispered, pulling away from him and looking into his glassy eyes, “I love you”

He let out a choked sob and brought his forehead to yours, “I love you too Cyar’ika, I always will”

His forehead rested against yours as you slipped away. He was whispering apologies, his eyes closed, unable to look into your eyes and see the light leave them. After a few moments, your hand fell from his face, and that's when he knew you were gone.

Tech held you close to him for a moment longer before his blood began boiling with rage. He laid your lifeless body against the ground, closing your eyes and making sure you could be comfortable even in death.

He stood, a flame burning inside of him that spread throughout his limbs, urging his fingers to find the pair of blasters that sat at his hip. He unholstered them just as blaster fire once more resumed. He dodged what he could, shooting the stormtroopers that closed in on him and depleting their numbers single-handedly, but his luck was eventually going to run out, and he knew that.

The first shot was to his shoulder, sending him stumbling backwards, but he fought through the searing pain and continued knocking down the soldiers. The second shot placed itself in his knee and he cried out as it gave way and he fell to his other knee, still fighting for his life. The third and fourth shots were the true nail in the coffin, both of them finding his chest and ripping him open as you had been. Even though he had armour, it was not enough to withstand two blaster bolts to the heart.

He fell forwards, his body sprawled on the floor unceremoniously. He lifted his head just a little to look towards your body. He grasped ahead of him and found purchase on your hand, still warm as if you were there comforting him through death as he had for you.

He laid down on his back as he saw his life flashing before his eyes, your hand clasped in his, and he mourned the life that could have been. Perhaps in another life, another time, things would have ended differently.

We Never Quite Made It

Tags :
6 months ago

cool cool cool, I'm feeling very very chill about this, very relaxed, I'm definitely not about to cry for the next week straight or anything, nope, nothing like that

but fr I'm ruined goddammit 😭😭 Wrecker being so insistent that he's a monster like my heart can't take it actually, I'm going to cry now and that is a threat

Few Fates Worse Than Death

Few Fates Worse Than Death

Pairing: Wrecker x fem!Reader / Wrecker x Jedi!Reader

Words: 13,780

Tags/Warnings: angst, hurt/comfort, canon-typical violence, platonic Rex x Reader, kissing, found family stuff so that makes it better right?

Summary: You refused to believe that Wrecker would ever hurt you, but on Bracca, his nightmare finally comes true.

A/N: I've written angst to some degree for every member of the squad except for Wrecker, so I decided to change that. This is the first and probably only time I pull quotes/scenes directly from the show for a one-shot.

Previous Work | Next Work | Masterlist

Few Fates Worse Than Death

The moment Rex told you about the inhibitor chips, everything fell into place. A cold, icy dread filled you, even as the others insisted that the chips held no power over them. Everything that had happened since Kaller, since Crosshair and Master Billaba's men tried to kill you... you saw it all through a new lens, and the galaxy spun dizzyingly before you.

Like the others, you’d barely paid attention to Omega’s explanation of the chip. The idea that the Kaminoans put some sort of mind-altering device inside every clone was beyond the pale, so absurd that, even if it was true, you never thought to give it much attention. And Tech was so confident that his own research proved the chips had no such abilities. It was easier to trust Tech, who had always been honest and open with you, than to question your own instincts.

But Rex was different.

The others protested, but Rex had seen something, experienced it himself, and he wasn't willing to risk any of his brothers falling prey to it again. You can hear his fear in his voice, feel it radiating from him. His insistence that the chips be removed, one way or another, was unshakeable.

Rex looks over at you, as if expecting you to back him, but you can only look away.

You feel like you can't breathe, can't think. You take a step back and settle down on one of the barstools, your hand gripping the edge so tightly your knuckles are white. Your stomach churns with dread. What do you do? What can you do?

You’d felt it, the moment Jedi across the galaxy were cut down, like a thousand tiny shards of glass stabbing into your mind. The pain had been nearly blinding, and it had taken every bit of concentration you had to keep from screaming. But you hadn’t seen the images. Hadn’t witnessed the slaughter. That had been a mercy. You hadn't been there, hadn't seen them fall, but you still feel the echoes of their deaths in the Force, a dull, aching pain that never goes away.

The thought of what Rex had seen, what the other clones had experienced, sickens you. Being forced to witness the death of someone you care about is awful enough, but to see your own hand, your own blaster, murder the very people you are sworn to protect? You shudder, the horror of it too overwhelming to contemplate.

The others are talking now, and the argument is escalating. You watch them in a daze, barely able to focus. Your thoughts are running away with you, and you have to fight back against the urge to panic.

The clones were made to be obedient, but not this obedient. There was no way the Kaminoans, or the Jedi, or anyone would have created them with the ability to commit mass genocide at the push of a button. It couldn’t be real. It couldn't.

Could it?

"The chips make you a threat to everyone around you," Rex says, and it's like being doused in cold water. You stare up at him, wide-eyed, unable to speak.

Rex's jaw tightens. "You're all ticking time bombs." 

And you realize then that he's right. Even if the inhibitor chips really do hold no influence over the clones, you can't ignore the potential threat they pose. Not after what happened on Kaller, the horror of it still fresh in your mind. You hadn’t been there after, but you’d heard what happened. If Crosshair had really wanted to kill those refugees, if his chip had made him turn on his brothers... how could the others be so sure their own wouldn’t do the same?

They're all still arguing with Rex, telling him he's wrong, but they don't understand. None of them understand.

Rex turns to you, and when he sees your face, he falters. He knows. He has to know what's running through your head, because he takes a step forward, and you hold up your hand.

"Don't—"

"She's not safe with you," Rex says, gesturing to you. His face is stony, his expression hard. "Any of you. How can you protect her from yourselves?"

Wrecker's eyes dart between you and Rex, and when his gaze settles on you, his brows knit together in a worried frown. He looks distraught, and you wish there was something you could say, something you could do to ease his fears, but you can't get your tongue to work. 

"What are you talking about?" he demands. "We'd never hurt her."

"No, you don't understand. It's not—" Rex pauses, and his expression goes from pained to resigned. He takes a deep breath and shakes his head, his shoulders drooping. "What's in your head is more dangerous than you can imagine. I've seen what happens when the chip activates, and I don't want to bury any more of our brothers."

Rex meets each of the Batch's gazes in turn, then his eyes settle on you, and you know that you won't like whatever he has to say next.

"You can't keep her. She's not safe with any of you," he says quietly.

He's not saying anything you haven't thought before, but the way he phrases it sends a sharp stab of hurt through you, and the ache is only exacerbated when he continues.

"I can protect her."

"We can protect her!" Wrecker snaps, taking a step toward Rex. He glares down at the captain, looming over him, and for a moment, you're reminded of just how much larger Wrecker is than him. But Rex doesn't back down, doesn't flinch. Wrecker glances back toward you and Tech, a desperate look in his eye, and his voice goes soft. "Right?"

You open your mouth, but no sound comes out. Tech doesn't speak either. He just stares at Rex, a deep furrow in his brow.

"She'll be safer with us," Hunter argues. His voice is firm, but you can tell from the way he avoids meeting Rex's gaze that he's not nearly as certain as he seems.

"It's not the same," Rex says, and he's clearly struggling to hold onto his patience. "Trust me. It is not something you can control. I couldn't. It's a risk you do not want to take."

You've heard enough. Your throat is tight and your stomach is roiling, but you can't let them continue like this. You swallow back the bile and rise unsteadily to your feet.

"Enough," you say, your voice thin.

The others turn to you, and when Wrecker looks down at you, his expression is heartbreaking. You take a deep, steadying breath, then glance up at him.

"It's okay," you whisper, and force a small, reassuring smile. "Everything will be okay."

Your words don't have the desired effect. Wrecker's brow furrows and he takes a half-step toward you, reaching out his hand. He hesitates, and you close the distance between you, reaching up to take his hand in yours. His hand engulfs yours, and his fingers close around your hand gently, like he's afraid he might hurt you. His grip is warm and reassuring, and for a moment, everything is okay.

But it doesn't last.

“General, please." Rex's voice is soft, imploring, and when you meet his gaze, there's a pleading look in his eyes. "You know I'm right.”

“I’m not a general anymore, Rex," you say, shaking your head. "And I’m not a Jedi."

He opens his mouth to protest, but you cut him off.

"You can't ask this of me," you say, and a shiver runs through you. You wrap your free arm around yourself, wishing desperately for the security and comfort of the cloak you left behind. "Please. Don't."

Rex closes his eyes, and for a moment, the two of you are silent.

"Alright."

The others look relieved. Wrecker's face scrunches up and you think he's going to cry, but he's also smiling, and he wraps his arms around you and picks you up off the floor. He buries his face against your shoulder, and you wrap your arms around his neck, squeezing as tightly as you can.

"We'll figure this out," you say, and pray the others don't notice the way your voice wavers. "It'll be okay."

Wrecker nods, but his voice is thick when he replies. "I don't want you to go."

"I'm not going anywhere," you promise. "I'm not leaving."

But Rex's words are stuck in your head, echoing relentlessly. It's a risk you do not want to take.

Wrecker sets you down, and when he steps back, there's a wet sheen in his eyes. He rubs at his face and laughs nervously. You reach out and take his hand, squeezing it lightly, and offer him a smile. It feels forced and unnatural, and Wrecker must notice, because his expression falls, and he looks almost guilty. He drops his gaze and takes a deep, shuddering breath.

You look past him to the others. Tech is standing by the door, his arms folded tightly across his chest. You can see his hands are clenched, the muscles in his arms tense. His eyes are fixed on the floor, and when he senses your attention, he lifts his gaze and meets your eyes. His brow is furrowed, and you know he wants to say something. You can see the words forming in his mind, but whatever he's thinking, he keeps it to himself. He holds your gaze for a moment longer, then looks away.

Hunter and Echo are standing together, watching you. When you meet Hunter's eye, he gives you a curt nod.

"It'll be alright," he says, and his tone is oddly final. He turns back to Rex. "How do you suggest we get them out?"

"Good question," Rex replies, and his gaze falls on you again. He frowns and tilts his head. "You're sure you don't want to leave?"

"Yes," you reply, but your voice sounds thin, even to you. You clear your throat and repeat the word more firmly, and the others all look at you. "Yes. I'm sure."

Rex hesitates. For a long moment, he just looks at you, as if searching for some sign that you've changed your mind. Then he sighs and nods, his expression grim.

"Alright. I'll be in touch."

He leaves without another word. The moment he disappears up the stairwell, Wrecker tugs you against him, wrapping his arms around you and crushing you against his chest. You squeeze him back, closing your eyes and resting your forehead against his chest. Your heart is pounding so hard that you can feel it in your temples, and your head is throbbing.

"It'll be okay," you repeat, trying to sound reassuring, but there's an uncertainty in your heart that you can't ignore. You're not sure who you're trying to convince, yourself or Wrecker, but you both need to hear the words.

You're not sure what comes next. You've only just got back to the Batch, and now this...

It feels like you're standing on a precipice.

You're not sure which way the wind will blow.

Few Fates Worse Than Death

Wrecker's headaches are getting worse, and they come more frequently.

He can barely sleep, and his temper is short. More than once, he's lashed out at the others, and you can tell that it's eating him up inside. He's ashamed and frustrated, and all the more upset because there's nothing he can do. When he does manage to rest, it's fitful. You're not sure how long it's been since he slept properly, and it worries you.

Your own rest is fitful as well.

Ever since Rex's revelation, there's been a tension between you all that was never there before. It's like you're all just waiting for something bad to happen, and every day that passes is just more time spent in anticipation of a nightmare you can't stop.

It's hard to shake, and sometimes, it's all you can do not to cry. You miss the Jedi, the people you thought of as family, and the knowledge that the clones were responsible for their deaths is like a knife through your heart. It was easier when you didn't know the truth, when the deaths felt more distant. Now, every time you think about the Jedi, you can't help wondering how they felt in those final moments. If they knew.

The pain in the Force is still there, but it's different. A constant ache, a reminder of all the lives lost. Sometimes, it's too much, and the grief overwhelms you.

The worst part is knowing that the others are keeping their distance.

It's subtle. Just little things, but you can tell.

You and Omega are still spending most of your downtime together, but when you go to spend time with the others, it doesn't last as long. You've barely seen Echo and Tech, and Hunter is avoiding you like the plague.

And Wrecker.

Wrecker is pulling away, and he's doing it so slowly that you didn't notice at first. At least, not until you woke up one morning to find the bed empty. He hasn't slept beside you since that night with Rex, and he's not spending much time with you outside of missions. And the longer this goes on, the harder it is to break the ice.

When you do manage to talk to him, you try to offer support. You want to reassure him, to comfort him, but the pain in his head makes him recalcitrant. It's like he doesn't want you to know the truth of what's bothering him, and the more you press, the more agitated he gets.

One night, you try to help him with his headache. He's sitting on his bunk, leaning over and clutching his head, and you can't stand by and watch him suffer any longer.

You sit beside him and rest a hand on his back. His skin is slick with sweat, and his muscles are tense, his entire body shaking with pain.

"Can I help?" you ask, keeping your voice soft. "Will it help if I massage your temples?"

Wrecker's answer is a muffled groan, and it's impossible to tell whether it's a yes or a no, so you tentatively begin to rub your fingers in slow circles. You start at his temples and work outward, hoping that some of the tension will release.

You keep rubbing for a while, and it seems to help, a little. When his head finally slumps forward, you pause.

"How's that?" you ask softly.

"S'good," Wrecker grumbles, but the tone of his voice makes it clear that he's anything but pleased. "Thanks."

He doesn't move, doesn't relax. You're not sure what else to do, but you don't want to leave him like this. It feels wrong.

"Is there anything else I can do?" you ask, and you try to keep your voice gentle.

Wrecker shakes his head. "I'm fine."

“You’re not.” Your words are quiet, but they feel like a shout. Wrecker freezes, and for a long moment, neither of you speaks. You sigh and move so that you're kneeling in front of him, and you place your hands on his knees. "Please, talk to me."

He doesn't answer. He doesn't move, his head bowed.

"Why are you shutting me out?" you whisper.

"I'm not," Wrecker mumbles. His hands come up to cover his head, and you have the feeling that the action has less to do with his headache and more to do with his reluctance to meet your gaze. "I'm just..."

His words trail off, and a tense silence falls between you.

"What's wrong?" you ask, and now your voice is wavering. The tears you've been fighting for days are threatening to spill over, but you hold them back. You take a deep, shuddering breath and lean in closer. "Wrecker. Please."

"It's nothing," Wrecker mutters, and his shoulders hunch. He doesn't look at you, and his hands clench into fists.

"It's not nothing."

You hesitate, then gently rest your hand on his cheek. He flinches, and for a moment, your stomach tightens with fear. But then his eyes flick up to yours, and when he sees your face, a pained look crosses his features. His eyes soften, and a single tear rolls down his cheek.

"You're not sleeping. I can tell."

"Neither are you," he grunts, and he tries to pull away.

"I'm worried about you," you whisper. You reach out and touch his hand. "Talk to me."

Wrecker looks away. He wipes the tear from his cheek and clears his throat. "Don't be."

"I can't help it." You reach out and touch his hand, and when he flinches, it's like being stabbed through the heart. You draw back and look away. "I'm sorry. I'm not trying to pressure you."

"I know."

"Just... if you need anything. I'm here."

"I know," he whispers. He looks down at his hands, and the tears are back. He wipes them away, but not before they start rolling down his cheeks. He shakes his head. "I'm a fuckin' mess."

"It's okay."

“It’s not okay,” he snaps. He glares up at you, his brow furrowing, and the pain in his expression is so raw that it takes your breath away. His voice is thick with tears. "I don't wanna hurt you."

"You won't," you insist, but your stomach twists and knots at his words. "I trust you."

"You shouldn't."

"Wrecker—"

"What if Rex was right?" Wrecker asks, and his words cut straight through your heart. "What if he's right? What if—what if something happens, and I..."

His voice trails off, and when he looks at you, his eyes are wet. He blinks and swallows, and when he continues, his voice is strained.

"What if the chip took control, and I hurt you? Or Omega? I couldn't..." He chokes and shakes his head, looking away. "I couldn't live with myself."

"Nothing is going to happen," you insist, and when Wrecker doesn't answer, your heart sinks. You climb up onto the bed and wrap your arms around him, pulling him against you. He rests his forehead against yours, and the tears are streaming freely down his cheeks. You kiss his cheek and reach up to brush away the tears, but there are too many. You wipe away a few, but the others just keep coming, and Wrecker lets out a soft, miserable noise. "Oh, Wrecker."

He doesn't answer. He turns his face into the crook of your neck and wraps his arms around you, pulling you close, and buries his face against you.

"I can't lose you," he whispers, his voice thick. "Not again."

"You won't," you murmur. "I promise. You won't lose me."

You can't be sure that's true, but you don't know what else to say. Wrecker holds you tightly, and you wrap your arms around him and kiss the side of his neck, and then his cheek, his shoulder, his chest, his lips. You want him to know how much you care, how much you need him. How much you love him.

"I'm not going anywhere," you say as your own tears spill over. You squeeze him tight and bury your face against his neck. "You won't lose me."

"If anything happened to you..." Wrecker shudders, and his grip on you tightens. "I couldn't handle it. If something happened, I couldn't—"

He stops and takes a deep, shuddering breath. He presses his face into your hair and squeezes you tightly. His voice is small, almost lost in the darkness.

"I love you."

You freeze. For a moment, your heart stutters, and you feel like your lungs have stopped working. He's never said it before. Not in words, anyway. You’ve known it for a long time, but to hear him say it, even in a moment like this, is something else entirely. It makes you ache.

"I love you," Wrecker repeats, and then his face scrunches up and his words spill out in a rush. "I've loved you for so long. I love everything about you. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, and the thought of hurting you, or losing you, is too much. I can't. I won't."

"Wrecker." You pull back and take his face in your hands. "Look at me."

"I should have told you earlier," Wrecker mumbles. His words are so slurred together that they're almost unintelligible. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

Your eyes are filled with tears, and it's hard to see, but you know you need to get close to him, to offer him the same reassurance he's given you countless times. So you slide onto his lap, wrapping your arms around him, and rest your forehead against his.

"I'm not. There was never a good time, not really. But now, right now, I'm glad I heard it." You cup his cheek and brush the tears away. "And I'm glad I can tell you now. Because I love you too. So much. And I need you to know that. I'm not going anywhere. Not ever."

You press your lips to his, and he responds instantly, returning the kiss with a hunger that catches you off guard. It's intense and overwhelming, and he pulls you tighter against him, like he's trying to merge the two of you together. His hand slips beneath your shirt, his fingers splayed across your lower back, and he groans into the kiss. It's the most intense and passionate kiss the two of you have ever shared, and it leaves you gasping for breath.

"I love you," you repeat, and when he looks at you, his eyes are bright. He leans in and kisses your forehead, then rests his forehead against yours and closes his eyes.

"I won't let anything happen to you," he whispers. "No matter what. I promise."

"I know." You press a soft kiss to his jaw, then rest your head on his shoulder. "And I won't let anything happen to you. We're in this together. I'm here, no matter what."

Wrecker doesn't reply. He just nods and wraps his arms around you, leaning back until the two of you are lying down. He pulls you on top of him, and when you shift, the movement is enough to send a shiver through him.

He presses his face into your hair and holds you close, and for a long time, the two of you stay like that, holding each other. It's a little awkward, with your legs tangled together and the bunk too small for the two of you, but it feels right. It feels good. Safe.

 "I love you,” you whisper again, and Wrecker's arms tighten around you. He kisses the side of your neck, and his breath tickles the hairs on the back of your neck. You snuggle deeper into his embrace and close your eyes.

"Love you," Wrecker mumbles. 

The way he says it is so soft, so full of adoration, that your heart breaks a little. You love him. You love him so much. You never thought you'd get to say the words, never thought it would be possible, but now that it's out there, the words come so easily, like they've always been waiting to come out. And the relief of hearing him say them back is almost dizzying.

You stay there, wrapped up in each other's arms, and you listen to the sound of Wrecker's breathing. He falls asleep eventually, and his grip loosens, but he doesn't let go. When you're sure he's sleeping, you shift, resting your head against his chest and listening to the steady beat of his heart.

You close your eyes, and for the first time in a while, you feel safe.

For the first time in a while, sleep comes easily.

Few Fates Worse Than Death

As soon as you arrived on Bracca, things took a turn for the worse. You'd all managed to dodge the Scrapper's Guild, but traversing the wreckage of the fallen Venator was a trial in and of itself. There was debris everywhere, and you could hardly breathe in the thick, oppressive air. Every step felt like it could be your last, and you and Hunter couldn't stop sensing something in the murky water below. Something lurking, waiting. And when Wrecker fell in...

He'd nearly drowned. He'd nearly been devoured by that dianoga. You'd thought you'd lost him.

You can't think about it.

He's safe now, and that's all that matters. He's safe, and you can finally breathe again. But the tension is still there, coiled tight in your stomach, and it's not just because of Wrecker. There's something else, something more. 

It's been there since Kaller, a feeling that something terrible is looming. You've felt it before, and it's never been wrong. The Force is trying to warn you, but the warnings are growing more frequent, more intense. Something big is coming, and there's no telling when it will happen, but you're sure it's not good.

You're standing in the back of the medbay, trying to keep out of the way as Tech works on Wrecker. He's running scans and taking readings, and the whole time, he's muttering under his breath. You cast a glance at Rex, who's standing next to you, but his attention is focused on the scene in front of him, his brow furrowed and his hands clasped behind his back.

"You've been quiet," he murmurs, his gaze shifting towards you.

"Yeah."

"Wanna talk about it?"

You hesitate. There's no point in keeping it to yourself, and maybe it'll help to get it off your chest.

"The Force is warning me," you say quietly, and Rex nods. "I don't know what it is, but... I can't shake the feeling that something bad is coming."

Rex frowns. "Do the others know?"

You nod, and he turns his gaze back toward the medbay. "Have they said anything?"

"Hunter knows," you say, and the words catch in your throat. "But... he's been keeping his distance."

Rex glances at you. His expression is unreadable.

"They all are," you whisper, and the admission is almost painful. You look away, unable to meet his gaze, and you have to fight the urge to cry. "I don't know what to do."

"You're worried," Rex says. It's not a question.

"Yeah," you reply, and a chill runs through you. You wrap your arms around yourself, hugging tightly, and take a shaky breath. “But it’s not just that. The Force is warning me. They... they could be in danger. All of them."

You swallow, and when you speak again, your voice is quiet.

"All of us."

He studies you for a moment, then looks back at Tech. He's still working, but now he's talking, and whatever he's saying is enough to pull a groan out of Wrecker. Rex watches them for a moment, his expression thoughtful, then looks back at you. His expression is grim.

 "How bad is it?"

You don't answer at first. The truth is, you're not sure. But Rex waits patiently, his gaze never leaving your face. Finally, you take a deep breath and force the words out.

"Bad," you say at last. You can't hide the fear in your voice. "Whatever it is, I think it's really bad."

Rex doesn't reply, but you can see the worry on his face. He knows what you're capable of, and he's seen firsthand the things you can do when the Force moves through you. If you're afraid, he's got every reason to be scared, too.

The two of you are silent, and when you can't bear it any longer, you break the silence.

"Do you believe in fate?" you ask.

Rex raises an eyebrow, surprised. He looks back at Tech, then shakes his head.

"Not really. I mean, maybe. Sometimes," he admits, and there's a hint of a smile on his lips. "But I try not to think about it too much."

You nod. "I can't help it."

"Why's that?"

"Because... sometimes, I think it's meant to be. Like, everything that happens is part of some bigger plan, and I can't change it,” you mutter. Your eyes drop to the floor. "All is as the Force wills it, and all that. But I don't know. It's... scary. It makes me feel helpless."

Rex doesn't reply at first. His brow furrows, and for a moment, he seems troubled. He looks over at the others, then back at you, and his expression softens.

"I know what you mean," he says, his voice is gentle. "But whatever it is, we'll handle it."

His hand comes up to rest on your shoulder, and you look at him. His face is serious, and the look in his eyes is reassuring. But he can't give you the answers you want, and the feeling of uncertainty lingers. You turn, pulling away from him, and your gaze falls on the others.

"Yeah," you say, but the word comes out sounding weak. Your eyes meet Wrecker's, and the concern in his expression is enough to make your heart clench. You don't want to worry him. You can't. Not after everything he's been through. You force a smile and say the words you don’t mean, knowing he can hear you. "We'll be fine."

It sounds hollow even to your own ears, but Wrecker relaxes, and the look of worry fades from his eyes. You look away, unable to bear the guilt gnawing at your stomach, and the smile fades from your face.

You know that if something happens, if something goes wrong, he'll blame himself. You don't want that. You don't want him to feel guilty, but the truth is, you're scared. For the first time, you're genuinely terrified. And not just for the Batch.

You're terrified for yourself. For the first time, you have something to lose. Your life, your happiness. You've never had that before.

And you don't want to lose it.

But the truth is, there's nothing you can do. You have to face the future, whatever it may bring, and pray that things turn out okay.

Rex's gaze flicks between you and Wrecker. He can see the concern in Wrecker's face, the worry in yours. His eyes are filled with sadness. Regret.

"I'm sorry," he says. "About before. I didn't..."

His voice trails off, and his brow furrows.

"I should have been more tactful," he says finally, and the corners of his mouth twitch up. He looks away, and when he speaks again, his voice is soft. "It's not an easy thing to talk about."

"No," you agree. "It's not."

He doesn't say anything, and neither do you. You both know there's nothing to say. There's no point in arguing or talking about what might happen. No point in making promises or predictions. There's only the present, the future unknown. So instead, Rex just squeezes your shoulder once more before letting his hand fall away. 

He moves to stand near Hunter, and the two of them start talking quietly. You watch them for a moment, but they're too far away for you to hear, so you turn your attention back to Wrecker and Tech.

Wrecker is groaning and wincing, his face contorted with pain as he hunches over. He looks miserable, and you want to comfort him, but Tech is moving him from one piece of equipment to another, and there's no room for you. 

Omega is hovering nearby, a look of concern on her face. She's wringing her hands, and her gaze darts between the two of you. She wants to help, and she's doing her best, but there's only so much any of you can do. You walk over to place your hand on her shoulder and try to give her a reassuring smile, but it feels forced.

You hate seeing him like this. You hate feeling helpless.

"Relax," Tech says as he prepares the surgical laser. "This won't hurt a bit."

Wrecker glares at him, and the look on his face would be amusing if not for the circumstances. Tech gives him an apologetic smile, then looks back at you.

"Could I trouble you to assist?"

"Of course," you say, and step closer.

"Hold his shoulders, please."

You do as he asks, moving to stand behind the bed, and hold Wrecker's shoulders firmly. He looks up at you, and the misery on his face is clear. It's hard to see him like this, but he needs you. So you do your best. You smile down at him, and when he smiles back, the tightness in your chest loosens, and the fear recedes, a little. You lean forward and press a kiss to his forehead.

"It'll be alright," you whisper. "You're going to be okay."

Wrecker takes a shuddering breath and nods, and you feel his body tense as Tech steps closer. You let out a slow, steady breath, and close your eyes, trying to impart as much calm through the Force as possible. Wrecker's shoulders relax, and his breathing slows.

Tech is talking again, and the sound of the laser whines, then there's a flash of light. You feel the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, and the air around you fills with static.

"You're in direct violation of Order 66," Wrecker growls, and your eyes snap open.

He lurches forward, his face contorting, and the force of him breaking from your hold sends you stumbling backwards. Wrecker grabs Tech by the throat, the laser slipping from his fingers and clattering to the floor. Tech tries to grab Wrecker's hand, but Wrecker is stronger, and he shoves him backwards, slamming him into the wall hard enough that it dents.

He's staring at his brother with cold, empty eyes, and you're frozen, unable to move or speak. There's no sign of the man you love, no trace of the gentle, caring, passionate man who's loved and cherished you since the moment you met. His face is devoid of emotion, his eyes blank and dead. There's no recognition, no hint of compassion or mercy. 

Nothing but a cold, empty void.

Your blood runs cold, and your stomach lurches. This isn't him. This can't be him.

"No! Stop!" you shout. Your voice cracks, and when Wrecker's gaze snaps towards you, a cold sweat breaks out across your skin. His eyes are dark, and there's something else in his expression. Something that scares the hell out of you.

Wrecker's lips curl into a snarl, and the anger is so fierce and sudden that it catches you off guard. You take a step forward, but Rex catches your arm, stopping you. You don't look at him. You can't look away from Wrecker, from his eyes. 

His grip on Tech's throat tightens. Tech's hands scrabble at his hand, and his feet kick uselessly against the wall.

"Please! Wrecker, stop! You're killing him!"

For a moment, you think you've gotten through to him. For a moment, you see something in his eyes, a flash of recognition, a spark of life. But it's gone as soon as it appears, and he throws Tech across the room with a snarl. 

You jerk your arm free from Rex's grip and rush forward, but Echo catches you around the waist and pulls you back behind cover. You struggle against him, desperate to help, but he's too strong.

"Wrecker!" Hunter cries. "Stop! Fight it!"

Wrecker is beyond hearing. He grabs his blaster and fires wildly, narrowly missing Rex as he dives behind the crates next to you, Hunter and Omega close behind. Your heart is pounding, and you're shaking so hard your teeth are chattering. Omega is trembling too, and she's staring blankly ahead with wide, frightened eyes. She looks like she's on the verge of tears.

"He'll destroy the equipment if we don't get him out of here," Echo says, his voice strained.

"You're all traitors!" Wrecker bellows.

He keeps firing, and it's a miracle no one's been hit yet. Rex pops his head up, ducking back down just in time to avoid being shot.

"You need to run," he says to you. "He's not going to stop until he kills you, and I don't think any of us are going to survive if that happens."

You shake your head. "I can't leave him."

"There's no other way. We'll distract him, but you need to go. Now!"

"No!" You shove Echo away and lunge towards Wrecker. Hunter is in front of you in an instant, grabbing your shoulders and shoving you back.

"Stop," he says. "Listen to Rex. Please. He'll kill you. Do you understand? You have to go."

"He needs me." You can feel the tears coming, and when Hunter sees them, his face softens.

"He does," he agrees. "But right now, he's a danger to you. He's a danger to everyone. You have to go. I'll keep him safe. I promise. But right now, he's going to kill you."

He holds your gaze, and the pain in his eyes is so raw and intense that you feel like your heart is breaking.

"What if you can't stop him?" you demand, your voice cracking. "What if you die? I can't let him do this."

Hunter doesn't answer. He's not even looking at you anymore. His attention is focused on his rampaging brother, and he's getting ready to strike. You can see it in his body language, the tension in his shoulders, the set of his jaw.

"Omega, stay with Tech," he says, ignoring you. "Make sure he's alright. We'll handle Wrecker."

Omega nods, and the two of you exchange a long, sorrowful look.

"It'll be okay," she whispers. "He'll be okay."

"I... I hope so."

You're not sure how much of that you believe.

"Go," Hunter urges. "We'll find you. I promise."

"Hunter—"

"Go."

You swallow hard and nod, and then you're running, narrowly dodging the blaster bolts thudding into the doorframe as you dash out the doors. You hear Wrecker's howl of rage, and then the sound of blaster fire as the others charge him, and the sound makes you sob.

"No," you whisper, and then you're running.

You're not sure where to go, and the ship is a blur around you as you dart down the halls, tears streaming down your cheeks. You run until you can't run anymore, and then you stumble, your chest heaving and your lungs burning. Your legs are weak, and the muscles in your thighs are aching, but you push on, determined not to give up. 

You have to get away. You have to stay alive. If you're alive, you can help him.

But the further you get from Wrecker, the more you feel like your heart is being ripped out. You want to be with him, to save him, but Hunter was right. You have no chance of defeating him without killing him, and the thought of you dying, of leaving him alone, terrifies you.

So you run.

You don't stop until the sound of his blaster fire has faded, and even then, you don't dare stop moving. You're sobbing uncontrollably now, and it's hard to see. Your vision is blurred, and the tears are pouring down your cheeks. You have no idea where you are, and every corridor and door looks the same. It's impossible to tell which way leads out, or even if there is an exit. All you know is that you're lost, and for the first time in a long time, you’re alone.

You finally come to a stop and lean against the wall, gasping for breath. You feel sick, and the walls are spinning. You squeeze your eyes shut and rest your head against the wall, willing the world to stop.

But it doesn't. And it's not just the room that's spinning. It's everything. Your whole world is spinning out of control, and you’re helpless to stop it. You've lost everything. You've lost your home, your friends, and now you've lost the man you love. He's been taken from you, and there's nothing you can do.

You're powerless.

Hot tears spill down your cheeks. Your chest is tight, and it feels like your heart is shattering. You can't breathe. You can't think. You just stand there, crying and shaking and feeling completely, utterly useless.

After what feels like hours, the tears begin to slow. You take a deep, shuddering breath, and the knot in your stomach loosens, just a little.

There's still a chance, you tell yourself. They'll stop him. They'll get him out of there. Wrecker will be okay. Everything will be okay. It has to be.

And then you sense him.

Wrecker's warm presence in the Force is gone, replaced by something cold and empty. He’s always felt warm, bright and strong, but now there's nothing there. Nothing but a cold, hollow void. A darkness so intense that it makes your skin crawl.

Your head snaps up, and you can feel him, a shadow looming in the corridor behind you. His presence is like a black hole, sucking the life and warmth out of the room, and you can't move. You can't breathe. Your heart is hammering in your chest, and the hair on the back of your neck stands up.

Your instincts are screaming at you to run, but you can't. You won't.

You don't know if it's stupid or brave, but you turn to face him.

You move slowly, terrified of what you'll see, and when your eyes meet his, a shiver runs down your spine.

He's standing there, his breathing labored and his body tensed, and he's staring at you with an intensity that makes your skin crawl. In the dim light of the wrecked ship, his face is barely visible, but his eyes are shining with a cold, cruel light. There's no recognition in them, no hint of the man you love, and for a moment, you can't believe what you're seeing.

But the hatred radiating off him is real, a tangible thing, and it's enough to make you sick. It's worse than any injury or torture. Worse than anything you've ever experienced. It's a raw, visceral hatred, and it's directed right at you.

You stand your ground, your hands shaking, and you clench them into fists.

"Wrecker," you say, and the words sound small and weak. "I'm sorry."

His brow furrows, and his jaw tenses.

"I should have done more," you continue, and the words catch in your throat. You're choking on the lump that's formed there, and you swallow, fighting back the urge to sob. "I should have protected you."

Wrecker doesn't answer. His gaze flickers over your face, taking in your tear-stained cheeks and the fear in your eyes. You can feel his hatred, the cold rage coiled tight in his muscles. He's barely holding himself back, and the tension in his body is palpable.

"Please," you whisper. "You have to fight this. This isn't you."

He doesn't reply. He takes a step towards you, and you tense, ready to defend yourself. You don't want to hurt him. You don't want to hurt him. You can't.

"Wrecker, please. Don't do this." Your voice cracks, and when he doesn't react, the tears start flowing again. "I love you. I need you. Please, don't do this."

Wrecker pauses, and his eyes widen. The hatred in his eyes wavers, and for a moment, you let yourself believe that you've reached him. But then his lip curls, and the hatred comes surging back. It's stronger this time, fueled by a rage so intense that it takes your breath away.

"Traitor," he growls, and then he lunges at you.

He moves so fast that you barely have time to react. You dodge out of the way, barely avoiding his grasp, and his hand closes around empty air. He snarls and whirls, his eyes burning with hatred. You take a step back, and the tears are streaming down your face.

"Stop this!" you cry. "Wrecker, please! I don't want to hurt you!"

He doesn't listen. He moves with a speed and grace that belies his size, and he's on you in an instant. You manage to avoid him again, but only just. He slams into the wall next to you, and the impact makes the metal buckle. The sound is deafening, and it sends a shockwave through the room. The walls creak and groan, and dust and debris rain down from the ceiling.

Wrecker's head snaps towards you, his eyes burning with a cold, cruel fire, and your stomach lurches. His lips curl into a snarl, and then he's coming for you again. 

You turn and run, darting down the corridor, and he's right behind you. You can hear the pounding of his boots on the floor, and the sound of his ragged breathing. He's gaining on you, and you don't know if you can keep ahead of him without hurting him. 

Your eyes are wide and desperate, and your heart is racing. You're terrified, but you force yourself to push that fear aside, to try and remember your training. You can't let it control you. You can't let it consume you. 

If you do, you'll never save him. You'll never get him back. You have to stay focused. You have to stay calm.

But it's so hard.

Wrecker roars, and you feel the air rush past you as he grabs at your arm. You jerk free, and his fingers close around empty air. You twist and slam your shoulder into his side, and he stumbles, hissing with rage. You reach out with the Force and shove him back, giving yourself just enough room to move, and then you're running again.

"Please," you sob. "Please, stop."

He doesn't.

You dodge around a corner, and the floor suddenly disappears beneath your feet. Your eyes go wide, and you cry out as the world drops out from under you. You tumble down the sudden drop, landing hard on your shoulder, and the breath is knocked from your lungs. You gasp, pain lancing through your shoulder, and for a moment, you're too stunned to move.

The sound of boots pounding on the floor above snaps you out of your daze, and you roll onto your back, pushing yourself to your feet. Your head whips around, taking in your surroundings, and it only takes you a moment to realize where you are. You're in the cargo bay, and the doors leading out to the planet are mere meters away.

Your heart leaps. You can get out. You can get help.

But you hesitate, and the feeling of his presence in the Force is enough to make your blood run cold. You dart behind a stack of crates just as Wrecker lands on the floor in front of you. He hits the ground hard, and the impact is enough to make the floor underneath you shake.

Your hand clasps over your mouth to hide your surprised gasp. Your chest is heaving, and your heart is racing. The tears are still falling, and you're trembling so hard that your knees are shaking.

The sudden silence is almost deafening, and the only sound is the distant hum of the ship's engines. You don't dare to breathe. You can't make a sound.

"I know you're here," Wrecker says. His voice is low and menacing. "You can't hide forever."

He steps forward, his boots crunching on broken glass. His footsteps are slow, methodical, like he's stalking his prey. He's close. So close. Too close.

"Come out, traitor," he snarls.

You shrink back against the crates. Your heart is pounding so hard that you're sure he can hear it. Your palms are sweating, and the crate next to you is slick with condensation. You have nowhere to go, and no way out. If you try to run, he'll catch you. And if you try to fight, you'll have to kill him.

"I'll find you," Wrecker growls. His voice is low and menacing, and it sends a chill down your spine. "You can't hide from me."

He moves closer, and the sound of his footsteps seems to grow louder with each passing second. You hold your breath, and your hand drifts toward your lightsaber on your hip on instinct before you clench your fist and drop your arm. You can't. You can't use it. You won't.

You won't hurt him.

You'll die first.

Wrecker moves around the crates, and his shadow falls across the wall. You can see his outline, and the hatred emanating off him is like a physical thing. It's palpable, suffocating, and it's enough to make your heart skip a beat.

You hear a thud, and a crate falls to the floor with a loud crash. You flinch, and your hand goes to your lightsaber again, but you stop yourself. You can't use it. You can't. Not against him. Not like this.

Another crate topples. And another. And another. Wrecker's getting closer. You can hear him breathing, and your heart is pounding so hard that your head is spinning. You can't see him, but you know he's there, lurking just out of sight.

He's so close.

So close.

He stops, and the room is deathly silent. You can't hear his breathing, and he's motionless, as if he's waiting for you to make a sound. The seconds tick by, and the tension in the air is so thick that it's almost impossible to breathe.

You can't take it.

"Please," you whimper, and the word comes out as a sob.

He freezes, and for a moment, everything is still.

And then the air shifts. You sense a sudden movement, and a fraction of a second later, the crate above you explodes. You yelp and dive to the side, rolling out of the way, and the crate is reduced to splinters.

 Your scramble to your feet, your back slamming against the wall, and you look up. Wrecker is standing over you, and his eyes are cold, dark pools. His hulking form trembles with rage, and he rushes towards you, his hand curled into a fist. You duck under the blow, and your hand flashes out, connecting with his chin. He stumbles, but he doesn't stop. 

He lunges at you, and you dodge, his hand catching your tunic and ripping the fabric. The sound of it tearing is deafening, and you feel the heat of his breath on your skin as he growls.

"Stop!" you plead.

He doesn't.

"Traitor," he hisses. He's on you again, and this time, you can't avoid him. 

Wrecker hits you in the stomach, and the breath leaves your lungs in a rush. Pain blooms through your torso, and your knees buckle. He swings again, and you throw up your arms, blocking the blow. The force of it knocks you to the ground, and your head smacks against the hard floor.

His fingers wrap around your throat, and he lifts you off the ground with one hand. Wrecker pulls you up close to his face, and the look in his eyes is terrifying. It's pure, unbridled hatred, and it's directed at you.

"Wrecker," you manage to croak. Your eyes search his desperate to find any sign of the man you love, and he growls, his grip tightening.

"Wrecker, please." Tears stream down your face, and you claw at his hands, struggling to breathe. Your lungs are burning, and the pain in your head is almost unbearable. He's going to kill you. He's going to kill you, and there's nothing you can do to stop him.

You know that your next breath will be your last, and you feel a strange sense of peace wash over you. There are worse fates than dying by his hands. Worse things than losing your life. You're not afraid. You're not angry. All you feel is sorrow, and a deep, aching love for the man in front of you. The man who's been your whole world, your heart, and the only home you've ever known.

If this is how it ends, so be it. At least you got to know him.

"Wrecker," you choke out, your voice barely audible. "I... I love..."

His fingers tighten, and everything goes black.

Few Fates Worse Than Death

Your eyes flutter open, and the world swims back into focus. There's a dull ache in your skull, and the air feels strangely thin. Your chest is heaving, and it takes you a moment to realize that you're not breathing.

No, you're hyperventilating.

Wrecker.

His name is on your lips, and you gasp before a terrible, aching pain lances through your skull. You try to move, but your body is heavy.

You're lying on your side. The ground beneath you is hard, and the air is thick and heavy. There's a bitter taste in your mouth, and your throat is burning. You try to take a deep breath, but it's like someone's squeezing the life out of you.

"Hey. Easy."

The voice is familiar. Soothing. But it doesn't register.

Someone rolls you onto your back, and the movement sends a jolt of pain through your body. You gasp, and the air burns. You can't see anything, but you feel something cool and wet being pressed against your face. It hurts, and you try to pull away, but a gentle hand holds you still.

"Shhh. Relax."

The voice is familiar, but your mind is too fuzzy to place it. Your head is throbbing, and your throat feels like it's on fire. You can't focus. You can't think. All you can do is lay there and try to breathe.

"Stay still. I'm trying to clean you up."

You try to open your eyes, but everything is blurry. A pair of dark brown eyes stares down at you, but it's not the mismatched ones you're looking for.

Rex.

He's holding something cold and wet against your face, and the sensation is painful, but soothing. You take a few shallow breaths, the air finally starting to reach your lungs. You cough, and it's like sandpaper being scraped against the back of your throat.

"Don't try to talk," Rex says. "You need rest."

Rest. The word echoes through your head. Your thoughts are jumbled, and you can't seem to focus.

"What... What happened?" you manage to croak. Your voice is hoarse, and your words come out sounding more like a growl than anything else.

"I think it's better if I don't tell you," Rex says. He's frowning, and the look on his face makes your heart clench. "Just focus on breathing."

You take another breath, and this one is a little easier. The pressure in your head is fading, and your vision is starting to clear.

"Wrecker," you rasp. "Is he...?"

"Yeah," Rex says softly. "He's... He's okay."

"Where is he?"

"We got his chip out, and the others," Rex tells you. "Tech is treating his injuries now."

There's a catch in his voice, and you can tell that something is wrong. Something terrible. You feel a sharp stab of panic, and you try to sit up, but the room spins. Rex grabs your shoulders and eases you back down.

"Just stay still," he says. "You need to rest."

"I'm fine," you argue, but your voice is weak, and the effort of talking makes your head spin. Rex shakes his head.

"No, you're not." Rex sighs and presses a damp cloth to your forehead. It's cool and soothing, and the pain begins to ease a little. "Just give it a minute."

"Rex..."

"He's okay. I promise." He smiles at you, but it’s forced, and there's a sadness in his eyes that makes your heart twist. "But he's not doing well. We're all gonna need some time."

Your heart sinks. You know what that means. Rex is telling you that Wrecker needs space. That he's not himself. That he's ashamed and guilty and doesn't want to face you. It hurts. More than the physical pain, more than the headache, the exhaustion, and the fear, it's a deeper, sharper kind of pain. The kind that cuts to the bone, and you can feel tears stinging the corners of your eyes.

"I understand," you say, and you hate the way your voice cracks.

Rex's smile falters, and the sadness in his eyes intensifies.

"Hey, now," he murmurs. "It'll be okay."

"No. It won't." Your voice is thick, and the tears are flowing freely now. You can't stop them. You don't even try. Rex pulls you into his arms, and you bury your face in his shoulder, sobbing.

"He tried to kill me," you choke out. "He... He was going to..."

Rex holds you, and he doesn't say a word. He doesn't have to. The pain is written all over his face, and he knows exactly what you're going through. He was there. He watched Wrecker lose control, and he had to watch him almost kill the woman he loves. He had to watch him almost kill his friend.

"I'm so sorry," Rex whispers. He holds you close, and his hand moves gently up and down your back, soothing you. "I'm so sorry."

You cry until your throat is raw and your lungs are burning, and when the tears finally stop, you're exhausted. Your body is limp, and your head is pounding. You lean against Rex, and his arms tighten around you.

"Come on," he murmurs. "Let's get you up."

He helps you to your feet, and you wince. Every muscle in your body is aching, your throat is sore, and the wound on the back of your head is throbbing. You feel weak, and the ground seems to sway under your feet. Rex holds you steady while the feeling slowly fades.

"I've got you," he says. Then, slowly, he leads you towards the medbay. You lean against him, and with each step, you can feel the guilt and shame and anger radiating off him in waves. It's overwhelming, and it makes your heart ache.

"Rex," you murmur. "Are you alright?"

"No," he admits. "But I will be."

"I'm so sorry," you whisper.

"It's not your fault," he says, but you can hear the bitterness in his voice, and the resentment. He blames himself for what happened. He's taking the weight of the entire situation on his shoulders.

You want to tell him that it's not his fault, either, but you're too tired. So you lean against him, and let him guide you to the medbay.

The door is open, and Tech is inside, tending to a  cut on Hunter’s face. Echo is helping, and Omega is sitting in the corner, her knees drawn up to her chest. She looks exhausted, tears staining her cheeks, but her face brightens when she sees you. 

She scrambles to her feet and rushes towards you, throwing her arms around your waist. The impact sends a shock of pain through your ribs, but you bite your lip and hide your wince. She's clinging to you like a lifeline, and you can feel the tremor in her body as she tries not to cry. You hold her close, stroking her hair, and the ache in your heart deepens.

"Hey," you murmur. "You alright?"

Omega nods against you, her fingers digging into the back of your tunic.

"Are you?" she whispers.

"Yeah," you lie. "I'm okay."

"You're not," she says, and the hurt in her voice is enough to make your throat tighten. "But it's okay. We're here."

She hugs you tighter, and you lean into the embrace, your heart aching. You wish it was as simple as that, but nothing is. Nothing will be. Not for a long time. Maybe not ever. You hold her close, closing your eyes, and her presence in the Force is warm and bright, just like always. 

You let yourself get lost in it, and the pain begins to ebb, if only a little, before you open your eyes again.

"Where's Wrecker?" you ask. Your voice is soft, but everyone in the room hears it and the tension is palpable. They exchange glances, their expressions grim.

"He's resting," Tech says carefully. "His injuries are relatively minor, and the surgery was successful, but his mental state is... concerning."

You swallow hard. You knew it was bad, but hearing Tech say it out loud is different. It makes it real, and the weight of that reality is suffocating. You take a shaky breath and nod, but the tears are threatening again, and your voice is unsteady.

"Can I see him?"

"He doesn't want to see anyone," Echo says. His voice is low, his words measured. He's... He's not himself. Not yet."

"I know." Your voice cracks. "I just... I want him to know that I'm here. That I care. That I..."

"Give him time," Hunter murmurs, his expression pained. "He's not in a good place."

"But I—"

"No." Rex's tone is gentle, but firm. "It's not a good idea. Trust me. He needs space. He needs to figure out how to live with what he did."

"It wasn't him," you protest, but even as you say it, you know that it's not entirely true. It was him. Just not the him you know.

"I know," he says. "But it was his hands that almost killed you. And that's hard to come to terms with."

You swallow hard and nod. You know he's right, but it doesn't make it any easier. It doesn't ease the pain in your chest or the ache in your head. You want to see him, to talk to him, but you know it's not what he needs. It's not what you need.

You let out a shuddering breath, your shoulders sagging. You're exhausted, and the world is spinning, and all you want to do is collapse into a ball and cry.

Tech approaches, and he hesitates for a moment before his hand settles gently on your shoulder. His eyes are sympathetic, but the frown on his face is deep, his expression troubled.

"How are you feeling?" he asks.

"I'm okay," you answer. The lie comes easily, almost automatically. It's a reflex. One that has been well-honed over the years, but one that's not very convincing. Not anymore.

He nods and studies you for a moment. Then, he glances at Rex.

"Help her onto the cot," he says. "I'll do a quick examination and treat her injuries."

"No," you protest. "I'm fine. I just need to sleep."

"You're not fine," Rex counters. He's not unkind, but his tone leaves no room for argument. "You were attacked, and you have a head injury. We need to make sure that you're okay."

"I am. Really."

"We need to make sure," Tech insists.

"I'm not—"

"You're getting checked out," Rex says firmly. "And that's final."

You open your mouth to argue, but the words die on your lips. You know he's right. Your entire body aches, and every breath is painful. You're not fine. You know it. But the idea of hearing it from someone else is too much. It's too real.

Rex gently guides you towards the cot, his arm around your waist, and you let him. There's no point in fighting, not when the others are worried about you. So you let him help you onto the bed, and Omega sits next to you, her small hand finding yours.

Tech begins his examination, and Rex hovers nearby, watching closely. You feel small and fragile and weak, and it's a strange feeling. You're used to being strong, to fighting your own battles. But now, you can barely stand on your own. It's a reminder of how fragile you really are, and it makes your chest tighten. No matter how good of a Jedi you can claim to be, it's impossible to ignore that the only reason you're alive is because Rex stepped in and saved your life.

"You have a mild concussion," Tech reports, and his words pull you out of your thoughts. "Several bruised ribs, and multiple contusions." He pauses, and his gaze shifts to your throat. "And those bruises will need time to heal."

Your hand reaches up, and you touch the spot where Wrecker had been holding you. The skin is tender, and the contact makes you wince.

"Yeah," Rex says, anger clear in his voice. "That's going to be a tough one to cover up."

You look away.

"It could have been worse," Tech points out.

"It was bad enough,” he snaps. When you flinch, Rex's eyes widen, regret flickering across his features. "Sorry. I didn't mean..."

"It’s okay." Your voice is quiet, almost a whisper. You swallow, but the lump in your throat remains. "I know."

Tech moves to examine the bruise on your stomach, his touch gentle.

"We can apply bacta to the worst of the bruises," Tech offers. "That will help with the healing process."

You nod, but you can’t bring yourself to say anything. You close your eyes and try not to think about it. About the way Wrecker had been staring at you. The coldness in his eyes. The rage. The hatred. The way his hands had tightened around your throat. The way he had been intent on killing you.

"Can I help you?"

Tech's voice is soft, and he sounds unsure of himself. It's such a stark contrast to his usual confidence, and it makes your chest tighten. This is hard for him, too. Hard for all of them.

"I'm okay," you murmur. "Really."

"You don’t have to be," Tech says. His tone is gentle, but there's an edge to it. “We understand, and we'll do our best to make sure that you're taken care of."

You open your eyes and look at him, and the sympathy in his gaze makes you want to cry. You don't want to be the one everyone's worrying about. You don't want to be the helpless victim, the one who needs to be coddled and comforted. You're a Jedi. You're supposed to be the one taking care of others, not the other way around.

But there's nothing you can do. Nothing you can say. So you nod, letting the tears spill down your cheeks, and Tech places a hand on your shoulder.

"Thank you," you whisper, and the words come out sounding more like a sob.

"Of course," Tech replies, and there's an unfamiliar warmth in his voice. "You're one of us, and we take care of our own."

He turns back to his instruments, and you lay down, resting your head on the pillow. The medbay is quiet, save for the soft beeps and whirrs of the machines, and the familiar sounds are oddly comforting. Tech continues to examine and treat you, his movements careful and precise. He works silently, and the others are gathered nearby, their attention focused on you. It's strange, but it feels nice, being the center of their concern. It makes you feel safe, and it eases some of the pain and fear and uncertainty.

You're surrounded by your family. By the people who love you and care about you. And as the exhaustion overwhelms you, and the pain fades into a dull ache, you realize that's all that really matters. You may not be fine, but you're alive, and you have people that care about you. And that's more than some can say.

Few Fates Worse Than Death

It's been three days since the chip incident, and things are... strained. You've barely seen Wrecker, and when you have, he hasn't said a word. He won't look at you. He won't even be in the same room as you. It hurts, but you're trying to be patient. Trying to give him the space he needs. But it's hard, and every day, the ache in your chest grows a little bit stronger.

You'd hesitated to say goodbye to Rex, and he'd again offered to take you with him. To keep you safe, to give you a place to heal. And again, you'd refused, promising him that things would be okay. And they would. You're certain. They had to be. 

But the entire time you'd spoken to him in hushed whispers, you could feel Wrecker's eyes on you. When you'd finally pulled away from Rex to board the Marauder, Wrecker had turned on his heel, disappearing into the ship without a word. He hadn't so much as glanced at you, let alone said anything.

The pain of that had cut deeper than the bruises on your throat, but you'd hidden it, plastering a smile on your face for the others, even though they all knew better.

The daring escape you'd made from Bracca had only served to complicate matters, and the entire team was on edge after encountering Crosshair again. The tension in the air is thick, and it seems like everyone is walking on eggshells, afraid of setting someone off. 

It's a far cry from the usual banter, teasing, and camaraderie that's typical aboard the ship, and the only sounds are the hum of the engine and the occasional beep from the instrument panel.

No one has spoken in hours, and the silence is oppressive. You haven't left your bunk since that morning, the high vantage point allowing you to see everything without having to interact with anyone.

It's lonely, but it's also safe.

No one bothers you, and you're free to let your mind wander. You watch the others, and the sight of them fills you with a strange mixture of emotions. You're proud of them, and the love you feel for them is almost overwhelming. But there's also a sense of loss.

What happened was a reminder that everything could change in an instant, and you're not ready for that. You're not ready to lose any of them. Not when they're the only family you have left.

You close your eyes, drawing in a deep breath, and let the feeling wash over you. It's a bittersweet sort of sorrow, and it makes your heart ache. You know that they're not going anywhere, that the five of them are a force to be reckoned with, but you can't help the anxiety that lingers, the fear that something might go wrong. You've already lost so much. You can't lose them, too.

The sound of footsteps approaching the bunk pulls you from your thoughts, and you open your eyes, expecting to see Echo. But the figure in the doorway isn't him.

"I'm sorry."

Wrecker's voice is barely a whisper, but it's loud enough to startle you, and you sit up, wincing as your ribs protest. He’s standing below, looking up at you with his mismatched eyes. His eyes are wide and pleading, and he's fidgeting, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. You can tell he's nervous, but there's a hint of something else, too. Sadness. Guilt. Shame.

"It's okay," you say automatically, but the words feel hollow.

"No. It's not." His voice is low, and there's an edge of desperation to it, and his hands squeeze into fists. You can feel the anger radiating off him, and it makes your blood run cold. He looks like he wants to punch a hole in the wall, and you have no doubt that he could if he wanted to. He could tear the whole ship apart. He could tear you apart.

You swallow, but your throat is dry, and the fear is starting to build.

"I could have killed you," Wrecker continues, his voice shaking. “I... I wanted to kill you. I was gonna..."

He trails off, unable to finish the sentence, and his shoulders slump. The anger fades, and the shame is so intense that you feel it like a physical blow. Wrecker closes his eyes and runs a hand over his face, his shoulders trembling.

"I tried to kill my own brothers," he says, and his voice cracks. "And I... I almost..."

He takes a shaky breath, tears stinging the corners of his eyes, and he shakes his head. You're at a loss for words, and all you can do is watch him struggle with the weight of his emotions. You want to say something, to offer some kind of comfort, but you can't. You're just as broken as he is.

"I'm sorry," he whispers, and his voice is thick with emotion. "I'm so, so sorry."

"Wrecker..."

He looks up at you, and the raw anguish in his eyes makes your heart twist.

"Wrecker, please, it's okay. I know it wasn't—"

"No. It's not." He shakes his head, his expression pained. "It wasn't me. But it was."

You open your mouth to argue, but he holds up a hand, cutting you off.

"I remember everything. I remember wanting to hurt you. I remember how good it felt. How right." His eyes darken, his lips curling into a snarl. "I'm a monster."

"No, Wrecker," you insist. "No. You're not."

"Yes, I am."

"You're not," you repeat, more firmly this time. You haven’t used the Force in days, but it flows through you now, warm and reassuring, and you can feel the conviction in your own words. "You're a good man. You're not a monster. I saw you try to fight it. I saw the struggle. I know what's in your heart. And it's not evil."

"I should have fought harder." His fists clench, and he hangs his head. "I'm supposed to protect you, but I... I'm the one who tried to..."

"Wrecker."

Your voice is sharp, but he doesn't respond. He's lost in his own guilt, his own self-loathing, and the weight of it is crushing him.

"Please, Wrecker, stop." You slide off the bunk, landing lightly on your feet, and you approach him, reaching for his hands. He pulls away, and it feels like a knife in your heart. "You don't have to apologize. I'm not mad at you. I'm worried about you."

"You should be." His voice is flat, his words coming out in a growl. "I tried to kill you."

"But you didn't."

"I would have." He turns away from you, his jaw clenched, his shoulders tense. "If Rex hadn't stepped in, I would have."

You reach out, laying a hand on his arm, but he flinches, jerking away from your touch. It's a rejection, plain and simple, but it's not unexpected. He's pulling away, both physically and emotionally, and it's tearing you apart.

"Don't," he says. "Just don't."

"Please," you whisper, your voice thick with emotion. "Please, talk to me."

"What's there to talk about?" He sounds bitter, defeated, but he doesn't pull away this time. "I'm a monster."

"No, you're not," you insist. "You're my hero."

"Don't say that," he mutters.

"It's true. You are.” He starts to speak again, but you’re faster, and your words cut him off. "You saved my life. Over and over again. You've never given up on me, even when the odds were stacked against us. You've always been there for me, no matter what."

He doesn't say anything, but you can tell that your words are affecting him. His shoulders are hunched, his body tense, but there's a tremor in his muscles, a slight shudder. You step closer, pressing yourself against his back, and you wrap your arms around his waist. You hold him tight, your fingers digging into the fabric of his shirt, and you rest your forehead between his shoulder blades.

"I trust you, Wrecker. I know you'd never hurt me willingly. And the truth is, I could've fought back. I could've stopped you. But I didn't. Because I trust you. I trust you with my life. And I always will."

He stiffens, his breath hitching.

"You're not a monster," you continue. "You're not a liability. You're my boyfriend, and you're my best friend. And I'm not afraid of you."

You press a kiss between his shoulder blades, lingering there for a moment. Your throat is tight, your heart racing, and you're filled with an overwhelming sense of affection and devotion. The feelings are strong, almost overwhelming, and you don't try to push them down. You don't try to hide them. You just let them flow through you, let them fill the space between the two of you. 

You've held them back for so long, afraid to show your feelings, afraid to let yourself be vulnerable, but now, the dam has broken, and you're drowning in the intensity of your emotions. There's a warmth spreading through your chest, a kind of peace that you've never felt before, and it's almost euphoric. It's like the first breath after surfacing from a deep dive, and the air is sweet, filling your lungs.

"I love you, Wrecker," you murmur.

"Don't," he growls, but the tension is gone from his body, his muscles relaxing under your touch. He leans back against you, his head dropping forward, his eyes closed.

"I do," you say softly. "I love you. And I'm not afraid."

You hold him, the two of you locked together, neither of you willing to move, afraid that the moment will end. He's trembling, his breathing shallow, his fingers curling around your arms, but he doesn't pull away. He doesn't reject you.

"I trust you," you whisper. "I love you. And nothing will ever change that."

There's a long, heavy silence, and then, finally, he speaks.

"I love you, too."

It's barely a whisper, but the words are clear, and the weight of them makes your heart soar. You tighten your arms around his waist, burying your face in his back, and you feel the tears stinging the corners of your eyes. You’re so happy that it almost hurts, the emotions swelling in your chest, making it difficult to breathe. It feels like you're floating, the weight of everything finally lifted.

“I love you so much,” he mutters. “More than anything. But you should be with someone else. Someone safer. Someone who won't..."

"Wrecker, stop." Your voice is firm, and you squeeze him, making him gasp. "I don't want anyone else. I want you."

He takes a shaky breath, his hands moving down your arms until his fingers are laced with yours. He squeezes, his grip gentle, and you squeeze back.

"I don't deserve you," he says.

"Yes, you do."

Wrecker lets go of your hands, turning to face you, his gaze meeting yours. His eyes are wet, tears streaking his cheeks, but there's a softness in his expression that you haven't seen in a while. He reaches out, cupping your face, his thumb stroking your cheek.

"I'm sorry," he murmurs. "I'm so sorry."

"Stop apologizing," you chide gently, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips. "I told you, it's okay."

"But—"

You shake your head, placing a finger over his lips.

"Enough." Your voice is soft, but stern. "No more talking."

His brow furrows, confusion flickering across his features. Then, he gets it, a hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. He nods, leaning down, his lips brushing against yours.

The kiss is soft, almost tentative, but there's an underlying hunger, a need that makes your skin tingle. You press closer, your arms winding around his neck, the kiss deepening, his tongue sweeping across your bottom lip.

He tastes like salt, the tears still drying on his cheeks, and the familiarity is comforting, soothing the ache in your heart. He's home. He's safe. And he loves you. Nothing else matters.

The kiss ends, the two of you gasping for breath, but you don't pull away. You stay close, your foreheads touching, his fingers tangling in your hair.

"I missed you," he murmurs.

"Me, too." You nuzzle his nose, your hands stroking his cheeks. "So much."

"M’sorry."

"I know.” You press a kiss to the tip of his nose, your fingers caressing the back of his neck. "But you're not responsible for this. None of us are. The only person to blame is the one who put the chips in your heads. You can't be held responsible for what they did."

"I know, but..."

"But nothing," you say, your tone firm. "You're a victim, Wrecker. Just like the rest of us."

He sighs, his shoulders slumping, the tension draining from his body. He's still upset, the guilt is still there, but you can feel it ebbing, the darkness fading.

"I don't blame you. None of us do,” you continue. "We're all just happy that we have you back. We're a family. We take care of each other."

Wrecker gives a small nod, the sadness in his eyes fading a little, replaced by something else. Something warmer, more hopeful.

"You're my family," he says, his voice rough with emotion. "My brothers. Omega. And you."

He pulls you into a hug, his arms wrapping around you, holding you close. "And I will never stop taking care of you. No matter what."

You bury your face in his shoulder, squeezing him tight. You can feel the tears building again, but they're different this time. They're not a product of pain or loss or fear. They're tears of happiness, of relief, of love. You close your eyes, letting the feeling wash over you, letting yourself get lost in it. You've come so far, endured so much, but here, in his arms, you're finally home.

Wrecker's fingers curl into the back of your shirt, his breathing shallow, his face buried in your hair.

"Thank you," he whispers, his voice thick.

"For what?"

"For not giving up on me."

You pull away, looking up at him, a smile on your lips.

"Never."

He smiles back, the expression brightening his entire face. You can't remember the last time you've seen him look this happy, and the sight fills you with a warm glow. This is where you belong, where you've always belonged. With him. With your family.

You kiss him, long and slow and tender, and when the kiss breaks, the two of you are both gasping for breath, the flush high on your cheeks.

"I love you," he whispers, his voice rough.

"I love you, too." You reach up, tracing his jawline with your fingertips, your eyes meeting his.

"More than anything," he continues. "And I promise, I'll never let anyone hurt you. Never again."

His voice is thick with emotion, and there's a fierceness in his gaze, a protectiveness that makes your heart skip a beat. He means it. He'll keep you safe, no matter the cost. And knowing that, believing that, fills you with an overwhelming sense of comfort. It eases the pain, the fear, the anxiety, and for the first time in weeks, you feel... whole.

You're safe. You're loved. You're home. And no matter what happens, no matter how hard things get, that will never change.

"I know." You lean up, brushing your lips against his, and his arms tighten around you. "And I'm not going anywhere. Not ever."

Few Fates Worse Than Death

Taglist: @baddest-batchers @covert1ntrovert @stellarbit @bruh-myguy-what @qvnthesia

@spicy-clones @kindalonleystars @cw80831 @totallyunidentified @heidnspeak

@lovelytech9902 @frozenreptile @chocolatewastelandtriumph @etod @puppetscenario

@umekohiganbana @resistantecho @dindjarins1ut @tech-aficionado @aynavaano

@burningnerdchild @ihatesaaand @lolwey @hobbititties @mere-bear

@thegreatpipster @lordofthenerds97 @tentakelspektakel @notslaybabes @mali-777

@schrodingersraven @megmegalodondon @dangraccoon @dreamie411 @sukithebean

@bimboshaggy @anything-forourmoony @9902sgirl @jedi-dreea @salaminus

@ghostymarni @gottalovehistory @burningnerdchild @yoitsjay @callsign-denmark

@julli-bee @sonicrainbooms @captn-trex @feral-ferrule @webslinger-holland

@marchingviolist @deerspringdreams @chaicilatte @somewhere-on-kamino

@silly-starfish @floofyroro


Tags :
3 years ago

Hi hun, I was wondering if I could get a Star Wars (clone) matchup? I’m 19, 5’1”, with blond/silverish hair that is shoulder blade length and blue eyes but one has a noticeable block of hazel in it. I wear a lot of floral prints and always enjoy “dressing up.” I’m fairly serious a majority of the time, but around my close friends I am able to let loose. I’m also known as the “mom” of my friend group because I take care of my friends and adore children. I’ve always been told that I act way too mature for my age, even as a child. I’m also a hopeless romantic when given the chance. I’m very quiet when you first meet me, so people sometimes think I’m stuck up. Once they get to know me though they see that I’m am the complete opposite and am very kind and put their needs before my own. I’ve always been the type of person to struggle with my confidence, and I constantly stressing out no matter how big or small the situation is. It also takes a lot to make me mad/upset because I try to be a patient and understanding person. My main hobby is singing. I’m studying it and have always really enjoyed it. Along with that, I am obsessed with musical theater. I have seen so many shows and cannot wait to see more in the future! I also love to travel and visit new places. I enjoy being able to go out with my friends, but I also don’t mind just staying in.

Thank you :)

I can do that for you ^^ i love the clone wars hahah

I match you with.... Commander Cody.

Hi Hun, I Was Wondering If I Could Get A Star Wars (clone) Matchup? Im 19, 51, With Blond/silverish Hair

Cody takes to you very quickly with him also having to be the 'mom' friend of 212nd and the 501st. He's the responsible one who just wants a nap and yo not have to deal with everyone's bullshit.

You are very smoll beside him and it's a very great contrast. Everyone already calls you can Cody the Parentals.

Cody is very taken by your clothign style and how you dress. It make shim smile ebcuas e he can pick you out in the crowd on Coruscant. He can see the patterns as you make your way towards his battalion.

Me loves that your more mature then you look, it helps him keep a leveled head and it's nice having someone he can talk to over the shenanigans that 212nd and 501st do that cause him panic.

He's the type that when he gets shore leave is at your place never saving your side other then to make caf/tea for the both of you.

He's the type of man who will climb into the shower with you so he can hold you close and just enjoy the intimacy of holding you.

Shower dances and performances between you when music comes on on the holo.

He hates having to leave but knows that you will be there for him when he comes back. And he treasures every late night of soft whispers and kisses shared between you both.

____________

Cody had just arrived back in your small appartment. He undoes his armor and leaves it at the front door. Making his way thought the hosue in his black.

He can hear the lightly singing coming from in the bathroom and a smile makes it's way across his lips as he reaches the door. He is quick to remove his blacks and walk into the bathroom his clothes left forgotten as he walks into the shower.

"Su cuy'gar cyare" he says wrapping his arms around them. They let out a noise of fright before they calm down. "Cody!, don't scare me like that!, I thought you weren't coming home until tomorrow" they say quickly turning around to face the clone commander.

"We finished the mission early and I couldn't wait another night to see you" he whisper agaisnt their ear pulling them closer.

"I missed you too" they say running their hands thought his wet curls, his eyes close as he lets out a light hum.he leads into the touch.

"I missed you Cyar'ika"

"I missed you too handsome"


Tags :
3 years ago

helloooo!

could i please have a matchup with any member of the bad batch or clones?

i stand at a whopping height of 4’11. i have tan-ish skin, and dark brown hair coming to my elbows. my eyes are also dark brown. i’m interested in anything to do with history and learning about different religions and cultures. i have a growing collection of crystals and a small plant army. i also love love books!

my myer-briggs personality type is enfp i am an enneagram type 7: the enthusiast. i’m silly, a little unhinged and always rambling about some obscure fact i found out at 3am.

cheers !

Bad batch

I match you with.... Tech

Helloooo!

Tech, He towers over you like he does with everyone.

He loves playing with and also doing your hair in different styles due to how long it is.

Soo many lesson on planet histories and language.

He loves teaching you any and everything he can.

You are both completing for who has the most collected crystals and Rocks. Every planet you stop on you both try and collect as many different crystals and Rocks possible.

Please read for him, he is so used to having to be the one reading for others he really just wants someone to read to him.

Tell him he is a Genius it will make his heart melt.

Take his goggles off and just give him kisses over the small things aroudn his eyes and tell hi mn how handsome he is and how much you love him.

10/10 this man once you get him to fall for you will never let anything bad happen to you.

"Tech you can't sleep in your goggles again tonight." You call to the tried clone who leans against the controls. His tired eyes flick to you.

He smiles lightly to you turning his chair only for you to see Omega asleep on his lap. "Unfortunately I don't have the option" he chuckles lightly as you move closer.

You smile to him leaning over to remove his goggles, he lets out a sigh of relief as he leans back against his chair white Omega in his arms.

The red rings aroudn his eyes are very prominent to you as he closes his eyes leaning back. You move around and press a soft kiss you his lips which he eyes shoot open and a small smile crosses them when you pull away.

You lean down and press a soft kiss to Omega's forehead before standing back up. "Ill leave you too, get some rest Tech" They say softly which makes him laugh.

"I will try but can't guarantee I will sleep" he whispers. You shake your head lightly making your way towards the door of the cockpit.

"I'll see you in the morning Tech"

"You too Cyare "

Clone wars

I match you with.... Dogma

Helloooo!

For someone so against rules being broken he sure does it alot for you.

He also is alot taller then you. He also loves just looking it to your eyes.

Late nights of him sneaking out to see you. He's very against people being our do the Barracks when they aren't meant to be but he can be a bit of a hypocrite.

He mainly learns history of planets he's got missions on so he will share his finds and what he had learnt

He can be quite soft when he wants to be but it will always be when it's just the two of you.

He will also play with your hair just twisting it between his fingers late at night when you are curled up into his chest.

He's such as peaceful sleeper when he gets good night's.

Dogma comes back to the Barracks late, having been held up in another meeting with Captain Rex and a few other head commanders.

Tired and worn out is how he feel as he drags Himself towards the 501st barracks. He rubs his eyes opening the door to the sleeping quarters.

Many of the other men are still out partying, eating or catching up with others. So when his eyes land of a small figure curled up on his bunk a small smile finds its way to his lips.

He is quick to rid himself of his Armor trying not to trip over it as he shoves it under the bunk. He brushes his hand gentle against your forehead brushing back the strands of hair.

He moves agaisnt to lay on the bunk with you pressed into his chest as he rearranges the blankets. He lets out a sigh of relief pulling you closer and draping one of his arms over your waist.

"Dogma..?" You mumble tired eyes flicking up to to his face. He hums as a response eyes flicking open. "Hey Honey, finally back" he mumbles into your hair. You smile and close your eyes snuggling into the warmth the radiates off his body.


Tags :
3 years ago

Fives fanfic and match ups links

Fives

Fives Fanfic And Match Ups Links
I match you with... Fives
JT
Hi! I was wondering if you are still doing the match ups, it you could match me up to any of the clone troopers? I’m a 5’5” 27 year old fema
JT
JT
JT
12 - "You would like that wouldn't you" 16 - "You look good as a dad" 70 - " You'd look nice with a child" "you just have baby fever "

Tags :
1 year ago

Bit different from my version of Tech, but hot as hell. 🥵

Resourceful

Resourceful

Tech x M!Reader

NSFW

Warnings: sexual tension, explicit sexual content, cock rings, light dom/sub like very lightly implied, anal fingering, anal sex, inappropriate use of a mechanic creeper, multiple orgasms, anal creampie

Inspired by and Written for @clownbloody based on this very spicy masterpiece and outcry for more male reader fics told you I would ;)

Resourceful

“I am not sure that your idea is a good one,” Tech noted, still not looking up at you. 

You’d been trying to distract him from the repairs he’d been working on for the last hour, having to repair a part to go back into the malfunctioning console. 

“Why not?” you asked, pushing yourself up to sit on his workbench. “The rest of the squad is going to be out for at least an hour, right?”

“Yes, they will be. However-”

You took his chin in your hand. “And it’s been a while since we had some time alone.”

“It has been two weeks-”

“Then what’s stopping you?” you moved your face closer to his, stopping mere millimeters from his.

He sighed, his breath tickling your lips. “I… Well, I do not want to neglect you. I want you to have my full attention any time we are… intimate.”

You chuckled a little, releasing your hold on his chin. “That’s sweet, but the repair needs to be done before we can get back into hyperspace.”

“That is accurate,” he agreed, his attention turning back to his work. 

“Don’t you think this could be a good way to multitask? You’re always talking about how you want to be more productive.”

His hands froze. You smirked at the small victory. 

“And you can have two things you love at the same time.”

He glanced up for only a moment, eyeing you suspiciously. “Those being…”

“Having the repairs finished and having your ass railed by your very sexy and very needy boyfriend.”

His breath caught in a tiny gasp as his grip on his spanner nearly faltered. 

“I mean really, you could think of it as an experiment.”

He set the tools down, finally returning his attention to you.

“What is it that you would be testing?”

“Oh, that would be you, darling,” you laughed, sliding off the table to stand behind him. You placed your hands on his shoulders before slowly pushing them down his chest, the shudder he fought encouraging you. Your hands slipped past his stomach to his thighs and his breath hitched. “I think it could be quite interesting to see just how long I need to fuck you to make that brilliant mind of yours go completely cock dumb.”

His head fell back against your chest as he sighed. Your fingers ghosted over his groin, pulling a whimper so soft that you felt like you might melt then and there. 

“So what do you think, my love?” you cooed in his ear. “Think I can shut down all that clever thinking?”

He took a moment to respond, obviously enjoying the way your hands roved over his body. “Y-yes, I believe such a… compelling theory should prove interesting to test.”

You padded off to your footlocker to grab a few tools you would need, allowing him the space and minimal distraction to finish repairing the part before he returned to the console.

He set the part on the ground and started to lower himself onto his rolling cart. 

“Aren’t you forgetting something?” you teased, chuckling at the confused look you received. “I can’t very well fuck you with your blacks on, can I?”

His cheeks flushed the prettiest pink as he pushed the bottom half of his underarmor down. 

You hummed, taking in the delicious sight of his bare legs. As he stood back up, you noticed the small discolored spots around his hip bones and the insides of his thighs. You dick twitched in your pants as you realized that those were left from your last adventure. 

He watched the way you licked your lips, swallowing hard as his length continued to harden with just the thought of what you were planning. 

“Go ahead and lay down, love,” you smirked, pushing your own pants down, as he laid on the cart, pulling himself under the console to begin installing the repaired part. 

You took out the items you’d retrieved before, two cock rings and a bottle of lube. You first put one cock ring on yourself, suppressing a moan as you situated it around you. 

You knelt down in front of Tech, grabbing his legs by the ankles. You heard his breath hitch as you lifted them up and apart so his ass would be on full display for you, humming satisfactorily. 

Releasing his ankles, you slapped his bare thigh, pulling a small whimper from him. 

“Don’t worry, sweetheart, I can smack you around as much as you want later,” you breathed as your fingers trailed over to ghost across his balls. 

“Please, cyare,” he whispered. “Teasing was not in the itinerary.”

“You’re right,” you agreed, wrapping your hand around his now fully hard cock. You pulled the cock ring onto him, his whimpers and moans sounding like a symphony in your ears. “Ready, love?”

He eagerly nodded, despite not looking away from his work. 

You lubed up two of your fingers and swirled it around his ass, pushing in suddenly. 

He gasped and let out a low moan as you started to work your fingers in and out of him. Once you were sure he was ready for your length, you applied more lube to your own cock. 

Kneeling in front of him, you lined yourself up and shifted your hips forward to slide into his waiting ass. 

You both moaned as he took you all the way to the base and you heard the sharp sound of metal meeting metal as a tool hit the floor. 

You wrapped your hand around his cock, lazily pumping at it, watching his face flush even darker. 

“Cyare,” he moaned. 

You smiled. “Yes, dear?”

“Please move.”

You tried to shift your hips but found the movement awkward. He was too close to the ground. 

You looked up at his face, amused at how he was clearly trying to concentrate on the repair. 

A grin split across your face as an idea entered your lust-riddled brain. 

You released your hold on his dick to grab his hips. Shifting your hips backward to slide out of him, you got comfortable. 

“Is something wrong?” he asked, glancing down at you for just a moment. 

“You tell me,” you hummed.

You yanked him by his hips, rolling the cart towards you to impale him on your cock. 

“Fuck!” he shouted, nearly losing hold of the wire he’d been reconnecting. 

You pushed him away again, before quickly pulling him back, your eyebrow quirked up, watching to see any objections. 

Not seeing any signs of dissent you quickened the pace, pushing and pulling the cart, slamming his ass against your thighs. 

He kept his attempt to work at a relatively steady pace. That is, until you shifted your hips just a bit and suddenly the tip of your cock was pressing against that soft spot. 

He cried out your name, his hands dropping to grip the underside of the console. A couple more thrusts and he was moaning between the heavy panting dripping from his lips. You saw the drops of precum beading at the head of his member and picked up the pace, wrapping your hand around him. 

“Fuck! Fuck, cyare- oh, fuck I’m going to-”

He fell apart with a shout, his hands flying to the cart. You fucked him through it, his cum spilling out over his stomach.  

Despite the delay the cock ring was providing, you knew the way his orgasm made his already tight hole squeeze around you would make you cum fast but at this point you didn’t care. 

His moans and cries were still ringing in your ears as you slowed your pace, pulling the cart out more. 

You repositioned, never fully pulling out of his ass, and pushed his legs up towards his chest. Then, you started anew. 

You pistoned your hips into him, sheathing and unsheathing yourself in his heat. His moans were nearly constant now and you felt his muscles contract beneath you. 

Tech attempted to form words, but they all came out as moans, but you soon realized what he had been trying to say; he was cumming again, the tip of his cock leaking cum. 

The gasping breaths he took between moans sent you over the edge and you plowed into him, working yourself through your own climax.

When the room stopped spinning, you pulled your cock slowly out of him, admiring the way your cum leaked down his ass. 

You took a moment to catch your breath before smiling down at him. “How’d the repair go?”

“Actually,” he managed between pants. “I finished it… just before I came. The- the first time, that is. I must say… that was- it was quite resourceful.”

You shook your head, laughing in disbelief. “Come on, genius,” you smiled, holding your hand out to pull him up. “Let’s go get cleaned up.”

Resourceful

Thanks for reading! - River

Main Masterlist Taglist Form

Resourceful

Tags: @writing-positivelyexisting @nekotaetae @lokigirlszendaya @get-wr3ckered @jediknightjana @idoubleswearimawriter @lucyysthings @unstable-kiwi @6oceansofmoons @l3xi3luv @winter-phoenix1995 @serenityselene @nomercyforthewarrior @ravenclawbitch426


Tags :
11 months ago

Hot. Damn.

Target Practice

Target Practice

Crosshair x M!Reader

NSFW

Warnings: Snark, snarky flirting, hair pulling, Crosshair is a BOTTOM, reader is a top, manhandling, scratching, anal sex, fucking at the blaster range, rough sex, distracted fucking, prostate massage, creampie, Crosshair is a brat

Inspired by and written for @clownbloody! Thank you as always for the amazing inspiration!

Target Practice

You weren’t going to lie, you had been getting a little bored. Yes, there is something undeniably sexy about a man who’s good at his job, but you could only watch him pick off automated droid targets one by one for so long. You inched closer to him, your arm brushing against his.

“You’re making it difficult to concentrate,” Crosshair growled, not looking up from his scope. 

“Hey, you invited me, Hotshot,” you smirked. “Insisted on it, really.”

You saw his brow furrow as he sent three shots off in quick succession. “Fuck you.”

“I know you want me to, darling, but you said you were coming out here to practice.”

Crosshair didn’t reply, only shifting his toothpick between his lips.

Maker, the things you’ve seen him do with those lips.

“Besides, I thought you were an expert sniper,” you teased, ghosting your fingers across the back of his neck. You saw him fight a shudder. “Who’d have guessed you’re so easily distracted?”

He sent off a couple more shots, the blaster bolts finding their targets easily. “Maybe you’re just an expert pain in the ass.”

You laughed. “Oh, Crossy,” you grinned, leaning down so your lips were barely brushing against his ear. “We both know ‘pain’ isn’t the right word for what I do to your ass.”

Crosshair hissed as he fired, the shot still hitting the droid, but off to the side instead of his typical center mass. “Told you not to call me that.”

“I know,” you smiled, flicking your tongue out against his helix piercing. “But you know how much I enjoy pissing you off.”

“You don’t have to stay if you’re bored,” he grumbled as you shifted your position to lay next to him.

You were now in a very similar position, both prone, but where he faced the targets on the range, you faced your target: him.

He reached over to press a button, resetting the range while he grumbled about making Tech and Echo give him a real challenge.

“I can think of a way to make this more interesting for both of us,” you mused.

That earned a moment’s glance before he began firing again. “What?”

Got you now, you thought. “Pause the simulation for me, Hotshot?” you requested.

You heard him scoff, but he reached for the control pad, pressing another button on it.

You stood up, moving behind him. 

“What are you doing?” he asked, attempting to watch you over his shoulder.

“Stay in your position,” you instructed. “Just let me readjust it for you.”

He did as he was told, only flinching a tiny bit in surprise as you worked your fingers between the top and bottom half of his black underarmor. You might have imagined it, but you thought you heard a soft sigh from the sniper as your hands made contact with his hips.

He started to turn his head back to look at you. “Eyes front, soldier,” you scolded, reaching up to grab at his short curls, forcing his head back forwards.

You heard a muttering of annoyance, but the way the tips of his ears tinged pink betrayed him.

You grabbed his hips, fingers pressing in almost hard enough to bruise. You drew in a deep breath as you pulled his hips up suddenly.

He gasped, catching himself on his knees as his grip tightened on his rifle.

“You okay, Crossy?” you murmured, your hands roving over his newly presented ass and thighs.

“Fine,” he growled through gritted teeth, but his face was redder than the trim of his armor.

“And you’re…okay with this?” you prodded, slipping your hands under his shirt to run up and down his back.

“Go fuck yourself,” he grunted. 

“But I thought that’s what I had you for,” you teased, curling your fingers to claw long stripes down his back. A moan caught in his throat.

He could never make it easy for you, you knew. Could he let you know how much he enjoyed your attention? No, that would be too close to admitting the feelings he definitely did not have for you. And you certainly didn’t already know about those feelings.

“What I think you need is a proper challenge,” you said as you slowly eased his pants down, revealing his bare ass to you. “Let’s see if you can still hit all your targets, hm?”

You knelt down, craning your neck to lick a long stripe up from his balls to his pulsing asshole. 

“Just fuck me already,” he groaned.

“If you say so love,” you said as you slapped his ass, enjoying the way the skin flushed.

You pulled out a small bottle of oil you’d slipped into your pocket before, distributing it along your already hard cock and around his hole.

You lined yourself up, pressing into him.

You groaned as his ass eagerly took you in, delighting in the sighs that escaped him.

“Fucking hells, Cross,” you groaned, gripping his hips. “Fuck you’re perfect.”

“Move,” he pleaded - though it sounded more like a demand - as he pressed the button to start the simulation again.

He began firing as you began to rut into him. You went slowly at first, making sure he felt each inch of your cock entering and exiting him as you tried not to jostle him too much.

The first ten of the fifty targets down, you kept your speed pulling out, but switched to plunging your cock into him, hard and fast. He grunted with the first one and you could see sweat starting to drip down his temples.

Another five down and you switched back to the slow but steady pace, enjoying his little whimper of disappointment a little too much. But now as you pushed into him you rolled your hips, making sure to really brush up against that sweet spot inside him each time.

“Thought you said it would be a challenge,” he grunted out through his panting breaths. 

“Careful what you wish for, Hotshot,” you grinned, slapping his ass hard.

He groaned and you sped up your pace, slamming your hips against his roughly. You heard a string of curses he mumbled under his breath, so you quickened your thrusts even more. 

“Fuck, your ass is so fucking tight for me,” you moaned, lifting on leg to balance on your foot instead of your knee. It shifted the angle of your thrusts and you hit that perfect spot in his ass.

“Fuck,” he hissed, his legs beginning to shake under you.

You bent forward, grabbing at his short silver hair, yanking his head back.

“Only three more targets, Crossy,” you told him before releasing your grip on his hair and placing it back on his hips. 

You used all your strength to pull him against you as you thrust into him. He moaned as he fired, hitting one of the targets.

“You’re gonna make me cum,” you groaned, the wet sound of your balls slapping against his making your cock twitch inside him.

Another target down, one to go. “Fuck, fill me,” he all but whimpered as he lined up his final shot.

You reached around him as your hips began to stutter, grabbing his cock and roughly thrusting your hand around it.

He fell apart under you just after his final shot left his blaster. He shouted as he succumbed to the waves of pleasure washing over him, spilling his cum onto the floor beneath him as yours filled him so much that it started to spill out, dripping down his balls.

You’d both stopped moving, simply trying to catch your breath. Slowly, you began to pull out of him, your cock half-hardening again at the messy sight before you.

“I can’t believe you actually hit them all,” you scoffed.

“Must not have done a very good job distracting me,” Crosshair sneered, despite the way he still fought for breath. “Might have to give it another try.”

You groaned, sitting back on your heels. “You’re gonna have to give me like ten minutes.”

“Not so big and bad now, are you?”

“Shut your mouth and clean me up like a good boy.”

He moaned as he began to do as he was told.

This was going to be a beautifully long evening.

Target Practice

Thanks for reading! - River

Main Masterlist Taglist Form Read on Ao3

Target Practice

Tags: @writing-positivelyexisting @nekotaetae @lokigirlszendaya @get-wr3ckered @jediknightjana @idoubleswearimawriter @lucyysthings @unstable-kiwi @6oceansofmoons @l3xi3luv @winter-phoenix1995 @serenityselene @nomercyforthewarrior @ravenclawbitch426 @luna-the-lone-red-wolf


Tags :