Gojo Is A Menace - Tumblr Posts

i umm sir..your chest is..uh...god *faints*

Gojo’s body irl:

argue with ur mammy about it.

*somewhere in a park*

Gojo: damn, todays weather is so good! *smiles widely* don’t you think so, sweet stuff?

You: yeah, it’s pretty sunny. *covers face with hand*

You: *grabs Gojo’s hand and move him in front of you to block the sun* Better.

Gojo: *smirks and looks down at you* so now I’m your human shield?

You: *looks up at him and smiles* you’re freaking tall dude. I bet you could even touch the clouds from up there.

You: *continues to tease him* so, is it hotter up there? Can you see the whole city from up there? *laughs loudly*

Gojo: *looks down at you and slyly smiles* hahaha, oh sweetheart. Since you’re down there; tell me, how big my c*ck is? Huh?

You: *eyes open wide and blushes* w-what?

Gojo: hahahahahahahah, you should’ve seen you’re face!! It was all red and confused!!! *continues to laugh and wipes away a fake tear*

You: *you blankly look up at him and scoff* whatever. It wasn’t even that big. Getou’s is bigger. *smiles widely at him and walks away*

Gojo: *just stands there with a shocked face*

*minding your business*

Gojo: wassup?

You: hey?

Gojo: I got a question for you?

You: ask ahead…

Gojo: do you squirt? Or do you cream? What kind of noises does your p*ssy do when you finish creaming or squirting? What color is the inside? Does it get real wet or not really? Does it clap? Is it real tight, to a point where my c*ckhead can’t even slide in? How does it smell down there? Can I smell it? Is your cl*t big or small? How do your juices taste like? Sweet or neutral? Is it hairy or not? How much fingers can you fit in there? A whole fist or just 2? Do you swallow or not?

You: ….(　˙-˙　)

*somewhere in New York*

Gojo: hey bro, I gotta take a leak, ok?

Getou: Sure, I’ll wait here. Just don’t take too long dude, I’m dying to try some New York pizza!

Gojo: you got it, bro!

*Gojo hurries to the public restrooms*

Gojo: *hums to some random song while doing his business*

*random noises come from the next stall*

Gojo: what the fuck… *mumbles and looks down*

*sees four pairs of legs, but one of them is kneeling down*

Gojo: …oh God! *finishes and walks out the stall and washes his hands*

*walks towards Getou with a huge grin*

Getou: you took forever!

Gojo: dude!! you won’t believe what I saw!

Getou: what? Shit on the ground?

Gojo: ew no. I saw someone propose to someone!

Getou: huh? where? I didn’t see anything?

Gojo: i heard weird noises in the stall next to me, so I took a peak and saw someone kneeling down in front of someone else!! Weird way to propose to someone but its cool either way!!

Getou: w-what??!? you saw two dudes in the same stall?!?! And one of them was on their kneels?!?!

Gojo: yeah!! Good for them! Now, come on!! Let’s try that pizza you wanted!!

Gojo: hey? You speak Spanish, right?

You: uhh…yeah? Why?

Gojo: great! awesome?

You: …

Gojo: how do you say “I love you” in Spanish?

You: Te amo

Gojo: Sheesh baby! I love you too! Damn, I’m so lovable!

You: huh? I was just translating what you-

Gojo: shhh babygirl. I get it, you love me too much! Who wouldn’t? ƪ(˘⌣˘)ʃ

You: … ~_~;

Getou: wassup dude?!

Gojo: not much…just chillin ;)

Getou: hmmm, ok

Getou: anyways, I got a question for you

Gojo: sure

Getou: have you ever had an argument with your girlfriend?

Gojo: Pft, me and my bitch don’t argue

Gojo: she just tells me to shut up and I do

Getou: ….(._.)

Do you guys think that gramps was hot when he was younger?

Gojo: come on

You: not interested, Gojo

Gojo: why not?

You: you’re immature, annoying, loud, and obnoxious. Want more?

Gojo: b-but dating me you’re not just gonna have that but a comedian, p*rnstar, and a mental patient all in one ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

Gojo: Me? Beg for anything? Hahaha! Geez, people get on their knees for me and beg. I’m too powerful and strong to beg.

You: hmmm, too egotistic but okay

*1 week later*

You: eww no!

Gojo: please! I never begged nobody like this!

Gojo: please, please, please!!

Gojo: just let me squeeze your tits for a minute and that’s it!

Gojo: please, I beg on my knees!

You: …never beg, my ass

Gojo: heyyyyy!!! Nanamin!!! I wanna tell you something!!!

Nanami: Don’t call me like that.

Gojo: but…nanaminnnn it’s important!

Nanami: Leave me alone.

Gojo: come on!! Its important!!

Nanami: Fine! But, once you tell me. You leave me alone.

Gojo: you got it :)

Nanami: …

Gojo: ok! But just imagine going to the dentist and once you open your mouth he spits in it?!? (ﾟ∀ﾟ)

Nanami: ….why are you the why you are?

Gojo: but, I don’t wanna fold the laundry (＞＜)

You: just do it, im busy

Gojo: ughhhhhhhh!! fineeeeee

You: pft, what a lazy ass…

*proceeds to go to the laundry room & fold the laundry*

Gojo: go do this, go do that…geez, she’s like my mom…

Gojo: *grabs one of your shirts* hmmm, I wonder what it smells like? *sniff sniff*

Gojo: mmmmmm, she definitely knows how to do the laundry *holds your shirt close to his nose* ahhhh, it still has her perfume scent

You: what’s taking him forever?

*walks to the laundry room*

You: Gojo!?! What are you doing?!

Gojo: Oh f*ck! I was just sniffing your shirt and gosh, it definitely smells like you. I may or may not have gotten an instant bon☻r

You: h-huh…

Gojo: hahaha jk…but not really jk ʅ（◞‿◟）ʃ

You:…（；＿；）

They ran out of condoms

They’re probably size small (can’t tell me otherwise)

Gojo: nah Megumi, you don’t love her…

Megumi: …that’s none of your business mop headass

Gojo: that’s foul 🥺

Megumi: look…I love her so much that…just looking at other b*tches it makes me vomit

You: Satoru! Where’s the formula?

Gojo: Formula? I ain’t no Mr.Krabs. Go look for it somewhere else, Plankton.

You: No, you dumbass! The baby’s powder milk!

Gojo: Ohhhh, I thought you feed the baby boobie milk?

You: …Satoru…please Σ(-᷅_-᷄๑)

Gojo: Hehehe, boobie milk(*≧∀≦*)

Gojo: What a lucky baby we have

Nanami: Excuse me, I gotta use the restroom.

Gojo: ooo, me too. I’ll go with ya :)

*In the restrooms*

Gojo: so, are ya gonna piss or shit?

Nanami: You do see me going to the urinals, right?

Gojo: so???

*Nanami proceeds to unbuckle his pants and do his business*

Nanami: *looking straight* Gojo? Where are you?

Gojo: R-right here *rises hand*

Nanami: *looks next to him and sees Gojo sitting on the urinal* What the Fuck!! What are you doing??

Gojo: What else would I be doing? I’m taking a shit.

Nanami: *disgusted* Uhhhh, I-I’m done.

Gojo: What can i say? i'm charming and irresponsible (;

You: Huh? Irresponsible?

Gojo: Shit, autocorrect (:

You:...Satoru, we ain't texting. We're talking face to face \:

hi luv! i was wondering if u can write what would happen if the jjk men caught the reader touching themselves. if it’s not too much to ask :)

JSJSJS YES YES

Characters: gojo satoru x geto suguru x nanami kento x f!reader

Cw : nsfw, minors dni, gojo satoru is a warning itself, oral. (f. receive) orgasm denial

𝘎𝘰𝘫𝘰 𝘴𝘢𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘶

✫ He likes to watch you when you touch yourself on a regular basis so it doesn't change much when he catches you 𝘣𝘶𝘵 he's GOJO SATORU so of course he teases you about it like a little shit he is.

✫ "awe you just need me touch this cute little cunt of yours?" "Now don't be so shy, you wanted this didn't you?" "Moan louder fr'me sweetheart"

𝘎𝘦𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘶𝘨𝘶𝘳𝘶

✫ Just like gojo he's a tease when he catches you 𝘣𝘶𝘵 he will make you sit on his face. He 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘴 it when you grind you cunt on his face.

✫ "come on darlin', ride my face" "𝘮𝘮𝘮𝘱𝘧! just like that" "gonna cum? Already? But I've barely started" "𝘺𝘦𝘴! 𝘺𝘦𝘴! cum on my face, make a mess on me baby"

𝘕𝘢𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘪 𝘬𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘰

✫ He will be furious why would you touch yourself when he is right there to make you cum? So he of course doesn't let you cum or touch him.

✫ "darling, are you gonna cum?" "Keep your hands to yourself" "you just had to touch yourself, you couldn't wait for me?" "𝘋𝘰𝘯'𝘵 cum till I say so"