Guys In Spandex - Tumblr Posts
Chris wasn’t so keen on his boyfriend Brad’s ‘soccer mom’ comment. His breasts were perky without the need for a bra.
For the longest time Brad thought Celsius was a cellulite cream.
Chris threw in the last towel for his burgeoning line of men's underwear after learning his boyfriend Brad sourced the prototypes by purchasing them directly from SKIMS.
Finally connecting why they took a sheet to the beach that one day, Brad found it difficult to pay attention to a lecture on copyright infringement from someone involved in such an oversight debacle. It was also hard not to wonder what the grey skintight suit might look like wet.
Brad was far from alone. Everyone in the closest row of cabana's would hold their breath every time Brad took a small step backwards toward the pool in his highly animated and passionate speech oddly championing someone with billions, a team of lawyers, and the law already in their favor.
She was also a lawyer herself... or at minimum on her way. It was difficult to keep up with bar exam news between Klhoe's lackluster clap back's and finding yourself justifying why not a single man has managed to remain on the show despite secretly feeling not so hot about that. It was a lot with nowhere to go, especially considering the level of sophistication fronted.
Brimming with frustration at his boyfriend's antics, Chris snapped and rushed Brad midsentence to land them both squarely in the pool. Everyone on deck was already on the edge of their seat as they surfaced.
Well… Let's just say Kim K deserves every single dollar she has as the pool deck literally broke out in applause at the sheer glean and mind-blowing accentuation of Brad's perfect nipples. It was breathtaking. It was the only time the two of them wished California was more humid and colder.
Despite the gray suit's flawlessness, Brad and Chris still managed to one up the design. The incident inspired them to launch a new brand of swimwear composed completely of dissolvable materials called ‘Sorry But Not Sorry SKIMMY.’ The initial investor would convince Brad and Chris to shorten the name to ‘But SKIMMY’ to transform it into the ultimate macho answer to the curvaceous clothing line.
Ironically, Brad and Chris’ venture would fail because no one could materialize a profitable dissolvable.
Just the Fashion Tip #1436
When doing curls at the gym never underestimate the importance of form-fitting.
Yes. That’s form followed by fitting with both words working in tandem. Got that? Most people forget the ‘fitting.’ It is such an amateur move.
Ok. Let’s concentrate now.
Hey …Is that Slater from Saved By The Bell?
Tight look
During aftercare, Chris would ask his boyfriend Brad if the real Ben Dover ever stood up.
He did at least once.
What?!
This new AI selfie app just colored Chris’ stellar gym outfit pink.
How did it know?
AI was beginning to freak Chris out where he already was.
Maybe AI was gay. Could it be gay?
For a moment, Chris wondered if he could take the thought any further. First, he needed to order the same spandex threads in pink. This sh*t looked good onscreen and might just come in a gay shade of pank.
Hmmmmm…
Chris found himself hesitating. He would need AI to conduct a deep search and was already spooked by its spot on intuition.
‘It’ was the correct pronoun for AI wasn’t it? Given this pink episode just now it was feeling more like it could be her/she/hey girl hay or one of its many derivatives.
This was a quandary.
You know it was times like this Chris was thankful he didn’t have morals. The last thing he needed was a dilemma. Talk about inhumane!
With his own famed fashion label coming online, Gustavio was in it to win it. Handsome, charming, and built like a rock, the Euro heartthrob made making pie as easy as love.
Wait… something’s feels off here. Let’s just hope it’s his shirt. Oh.