Icarus Exists - Tumblr Posts
Reblog if you're gay, lesbian, bisexual, pansexual, asexual, transgender or a supporter.
This should be reblogged by everyone. Even if you’re straight, you should be a supporter.
Friendly reminder that people with stigmatized personality disorders like Borderline, Narcissistic, and Antisocial are people, too, and they struggle with their disorders more than anyone else. That's why it's called a "disorder;" it impacts their life in a negative way because of, more often than not, childhood trauma. People typically develop personality disorders because of things they went through in childhood that fundamentally changed the way their brains work, and it takes so much therapy and constant hard work to unlearn the behaviors adopted in childhood. (Not to mention that traumatized people are more likely to be re-traumatized later in life.) Vilifying people with these disorders is extremely harmful to them, others they care about, and those who care about them.
We are people, just like you. Please, be kind.
(imo npd creature by @imnotherelmao)
the npd urge to kill yourself when you fail at something
how to make a wolfe
albedo’s skillset
wanderer’s god complex
alhaitham’s personality
qingque’s work ethic
sunday’s religious trauma
aven’s mental health
Please, if you can, take a moment to read and share this because I feel like I'm screaming underwater.
NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) stigma is rampant right now, and seems to be getting progressively worse. Everyone is using it as a buzzword in the worst ways possible, spreading misinformation and hatred against a real disorder.
I could go on a long time about how this happened, why it's factually incorrect (and what the disorder actually IS), why it's harmful, and the changes I'd like to see. But to keep this concise, I'll simply link to a few posts under the cut for further reading.
The point of this post is a plea. Please help stop the spread of stigma. Even in mental health communities, even around others with personality disorders, in neurodivergent "safe" spaces, other communities I thought people would be supportive in (e.g. trans support groups, progressive spaces in general), it keeps coming up. So I'm willing to bet that a lot of people on this site need to see this.
Because it's so hard to exist in this world.
My disorder already makes me feel as if I'm worthless and unlovable, like there's something inherently wrong and damaged about me. And it's so much harder to fight that and heal when my daily life consists of:
Laughing and spending time with my friends, doing my utmost best to connect and stay present and focused on them, trying to let my guards down and be real and believe I'm lovable- when suddenly they throw out the word "narcissist" to describe horrible people or someone they hate, or the conversation turns to how evil "people with narcissistic personality disorder" are. (Seriously, you don't know which of your friends might have NPD and feels like shit when you say those things & now knows that you'd hate them if you knew.)
Trying to look up "mental health positivity for people with npd", "mental health positivity cluster bs", only to find a) none of that, and b) more of the same old vile shit that makes me feel terrible about myself.
Having a hard time (which is constant at this point) and trying to look up resources for myself, only to again, find the same stigma. And no resources.
Not having any clue how to help myself, because even the mental health field is spitting so much vitriol at people with DISORDERS (who they're supposed to be helping!) that there's no solid research or therapy programs for people like me.
Losing close friends when they find out, despite us having had a good relationship before, and them KNOWING me and knowing that I'm not like the trending image of pwNPD. Because now they only see me through the lens of stigma and misinformation.
Hearing the same stigma come up literally wherever I go. Clubs. Meetings. Any online space. At the bus stop. At the mall. At a restaurant. At work. Buzzword of the year that everyone loooves loudly throwing around with their friends or over the phone. Feels awesome for me, makes my day so much better/s
I could go on for a long time, but I'm scared no one will read/rb this if it gets too much longer.
So please. Stop using the word "narcissist" as a synonym for "abusive".
Stop bringing up people you hate who you believe to have NPD because of a stigmatizing article full of misinformation whenever someone with actual NPD opens their mouth. (Imagine if people did that with any other disorder! "Hey, I'm autistic." "Oh... my old roommate screamed at me whenever I made noise around him, and didn't understand my needs, which seems like sensory overload and difficulty with social cues. He was definitely autistic. But as long as you're self-aware and always restraining your innate desire to be an abusive asshole, you're okay I guess, maybe." ...See how offensive and ignorant that is?)
Stop preventing healthcare for people with a disorder just because it's trendy to use us as a scapegoat.
If you got this far, thank you for reading, and please share this if you can. Further reading is under the cut.
NPD Criteria, re-written by someone who actually has NPD
Stigma in the DSM
Common perception of the DSM criteria vs how someone may actually experience them (Keep in mind that this is the way I personally experience these symptoms, and that presentation can vary a lot between individuals)
"Idk, the stigma is right though, because I've known a lot of people with NPD who are jerks, so I'm going to continue to support the blockage of treatment for this condition."
(All of these were written by me, because I didn't want to link to other folks' posts without permission, but if you want to add your own links in reblogs or replies please feel free <3)
Children/teens aren’t allowed to be sad or in a bad mood because they can get yelled at for it and ridiculed and told to ‘change your attitude or I will for you’, while adults who are sad or in a bad mood, are allowed to yell at and take their frustration out on the kids. Adult privilege huh?
this!!!
If you advocate for mental health awareness, but joke about things like intrusive thoughts and schizophrenia, think it’s disgusting and lazy when people who are depressed can’t do things like showering or cleaning their room, use terms like “narcissistic abuse”, and believe that having ASPD, BPD, or NPD makes someone a bad person, you are not a mental health advocate. You don’t actually care about helping people or de-stigmatizing mental illness, you just want to make yourself feel like you do. You can’t pick and choose what disorders and symptoms are acceptable, and which ones make someone a bad person. Either you support everyone, or you support no one.
and if you’re neurodivergent/mentally ill and you do any of those things, you are part of the problem. there’s no such thing as “good/moral” disorders, or “bad/immoral” disorders. We all need to have each other’s backs.
“if somebody becomes panicked when you accuse them of lying theyre obviously not telling the truth” shut up ugly im a survivor who got punished for shit i never did all the time of fucking course im gonna panic when im blamed for something i didnt do
So many people seem completely unaware of what a genuine apology is.
And that's because children are forced to say sorry on command.
Before they ever had a chance to process what they did, why they did it, what effect it had on others, or what they should have done instead, they're expected to say that they're sorry. And they're expected to "say it like you mean it" with no indication of what that even means and with no time to figure out how to phrase it correctly.
Sometimes, even when the child's actions are justified by any logical reasoning, they're expected to apologize because an authority figure demands it.
The goal of saying sorry ends up being solely to avoid punishment. And they phrase the apology in whatever way the authority figure will accept.
The result is an entire society filled with people who give completely useless apologies that appear like they're only trying to avoid punishment.
The whole, "K*lling urself is a permanent solution to a temporary problem" bullshit is spouted by the ignorant lucky ones who have only had temporary problems. Some people's problems are permanent so maybe try offering actual help and support to them rather than regurgitating an overused phrase that means nothing to people with real struggles.
*mom voice* You can get these words back when you know what they mean
Does anyone ever just wants to stop caring and giving a fuck and just letting your personality disorder go free? I know I can't bc it will make me a bad person, but are you never just oh so tired of keeping this muzzle on? Sometimes I feel like I'm suffocating in order for others to be safe.
i don’t want to live like this. i only exist at this point. all i do is distract my mind so i don’t kill myself
I hate when people say suicide is the easy way out, they have no idea the pain you must be in to want to end your own life
I hate the question where do you see yourself in 5 years like bro fucking dead next question thanks
If I ever kill myself just know I tried my fucking best and please forgive me