Sanders Sides Au - Tumblr Posts

Resident dog walker by day, Running with wolves by night.

Resident dog walker by day, Running with wolves by night.

Star player by day, Fallen star by night.

Rock band guitar player by day, demon for hire by night.

E.V.0.L Au Update

So it’s been like a year or something idk??? Cause I’m a stupid procrastinating sh*t. But I’ve finally buckled down and wrestled myself into inspiration mode and here we are.

I have the prologue and chapter one finished! I just wanted to see if anyone still wanted to talk about it or go over it with me before I actually post either of them though.

Also I probably won’t post chapter one until I have the second one mostly written? Which will hopefully be soon so long as I keep myself in line?

Sorry again about being so d*mn lazy lol. Hopefully people are still interested in this.

Tag List:

@ren-allen @noneed4thistbh @accidental-sanders @demonvirgil @totalwhovian @bandgeek82002-love @allycat31415 @notalwaysthevillian @cloudchaser7 @iamredxd @lacrimosathedark @idon-kno @darkhumourandfandoms @phangirlandkilljoy @nikova-eve

Holy stack of flapjacks everything about this is amazing!!! I love creepy cute things, supernatural creatures, and eighties music/nostalgia and you just combined them all so perfectly like how??? And their little star like freckles and black sclera and claws are all so precious and pretty??? Outstanding. Fantastic. Mindblown. 

“SWEET DREAMS ARE MADE OF THIS,

WHO AM I TO DISAGREE?” (x)

I FINALLY FINISHED IT AND IT TURNED OUT EXACTLY HOW I PICTURED IT I’M SO FUCKIN’ HAPPYYYYYYYYYY !! !

So this is something I wanna make an AU for where the sides (minus Remus ‘cause I thought of this before the latest episode) are Fae-Demon-Whatever-The-Fucks-I-Just-Really-Like-The-Thought-Of-Combining-Those in a world that’s 80s inspired

Reblogs are welcomed~ <3

I will never ever get tired of seeing everyone’s different Sanders Sides SU aus, since I love both shows so much. That being said, this is some hands down gorgeous art. The last three dance poses are my favorites of this group and the last two fusion designs are my favorite.

I also totally picture this universe’s Roman saying something along the lines of “I’m not just a romantic person I am romance itself, baby.” lol

Patton is so delightfully tiny and I love that Virgil and Patton’s gem placements seem to mirror each others like Roman’s two does.

AAahhh

I took almost freaking all day doing this…….WHy Did I DO THIS?

SO:

For some reason, Roman turned into a fusion himself… I. Have no reasons except Extra Roman and that I made the gems basically their logos and, well, Ro had one on each shoulder.

ALSO I drew all the line art, and then they became gems, and then I did way too much research (and still have no names for the fusions), then Patton became an Aquamarine gem, which meant TINY. So that meant a lot of adjustments because I’d drawn them all in about the same size (because it wasn’t meant to be an SU au) At first, Lo was gonna be a sapphire, but I wanted to go with forehead gem, which meant the single-eye was gonna be hard to make look gooodd, sO now he’s Iolite which is also known as “water sapphire”. ……do what you will with that information….

Also, I’m not sure what Rubellite is composed of, so……that’s why Ro’s pair is un-labeled/unnamed…

…….And…yeah I got a (vague) story…………..I mean I spent pretty much all day drawing and thinking about it…

Gen tag:

Keep reading

I haven’t seen the movie in forever but this is amazing! It’s just so sweet and perfect? And Virgil totally rocks those outfits. Also love that you made Remus’ black stripes thicker while you made Roman’s white stripes thicker. Ahhh such a nice subtle costume design. 

Kat’s Sanders Sides Beetlejuice AU~

And so it is here and it’s come with a twist!! I decided to combine both the movie and the cartoon!

Remus is Evil!Betelgeuse, Roman is Good!Beetlejuice, Logan is Adam Maitland, Patton is Barbara Maitland, Thomas is Juno, Virgil is Lydia Deetz, Emile is Charles Deetz, Remy is Delia Deetz, and (even though I didn’t draw him) Deceit is Otho

The plot is pretty much exactly like the movie except that Roman wants a free ticket out of the Netherworld but he can only do that by at least getting engaged so he tries to get Virgil to agree to it, saying that they never even have to get married

Meanwhile, Logan and Patton are trying to get the Deetz’s out of their house while also dealing with Roman’s evil twin brother, Remus (who later tricks Virgil into agreeing to the free-ticket-out-marriage by disguising himself as Roman)

In the end they defeat Remus and it’s a happy ending for all, and Roman and Virgil are engaged and go on adventures in the Netherworld!

Reblogs Are Welcomed~ <3

E.V.O.L Prologue - Love is Evol

Chapter Summary: We start our story several years prier to the main events, in a dream unlike any other that came before it. One that would forever shift young Virgil’s dreams from henceforth.

Warnings: Mentions of murder and nightmares.

Pairings: None as of yet. 

Word Count: 1k+

Chapter followed by Author’s Note then Tag List under the read more:

Yeah... yeah... yeah...

Pink lipstick stains, cigarette butts.

I lie in bed, I hate my guts.

Blackness.

Loss of consciousness.

The usual, in perchance to dream.

Except what greeted him instead of the usual cacophony of screaming, screeching, and shrilling was a melodic birdsong.

Chirps, caws and coos surrounded him, enveloping him in a soothing sensation. An unexpected break from the usual night terrors that tended to plague him.

He was in a garden. A massive one, by the looks of it. Or perhaps he himself was tiny. Hard to tell in dreams.

The boy went to take a step forward, only to find himself floundering a bit. A quick glance down confirmed that he did not currently sport his human legs. They were replaced by little bird talons, grasping upon the soft earth. Thus he began hopping back and forth, searching for something to clue him in on just what was happening in this particular peculiar dream.

He knew for sure it was in fact a dream. Unlike most children his age, he had always been more aware of matters of consciousness. It was normally attributed to being surrounded by so many mystical mysteries in his day by day basis. Either way, he was still as curious as a cat like the other kids. So he trudged onwards.

Onwards and upwards. Upwards and onwards. Passing a few bushes, some trees, and several vibrant spring flowers. The only break from all of the plant life would be the occasional shadow of a bird that would pass by overhead. Always slightly too far away to make out any specifics of form or shape. He continued on like that until finally he reached a clearing with a mighty fountain. There were three whole levels of glistening water and angelic adornments, most of which were majestic Swans, that seemed to call his name.

He found himself flying all the way to the top, without ever even thinking about flapping the wings he was previously unaware of. As if it was instinct. Something deeply biological. Or even supernatural. After all, that was the natural for him. Or at least for those around him.

Peering into the crystal clear water reaffirmed his suspicions that he was currently a bird. A Sparrow, if he remembered his Pops’ teachings correctly. Pops had always been the parent most into woodland critters and other such creatures of the sort. And they were as drawn to him as he was to them. Speaking of being entranced…

The boy felt an odd connection to this reflection, despite not being his actual one. Somehow it still seemed to fit him perfectly. Well, as much as a member of an entirely different species could that is. Still, he yearned for far more answers than just that. He turned away from the water’s gleaming surface in order to fully take in his surroundings for the first time.

It was, indeed, a massive garden. Though he was tiny, as most little songbirds tended to be, this was still the largest garden he had ever had the chance thus far to lay his eyes upon.

In his awe of the grandioseness of it all, he had almost missed the shadow of the bird fly over him. Much closer than any of the others had previously been. Almost tangible in its intangibleness. Instinct took over once more, and he took flight in pursuit of it.

 It only takes two lonely people,

To fuck love up and make it evil.

It only takes a drop of evil,

To fuck up two beautiful people.

They weaved through well-trimmed bushes, magnificent stone statues, and picturesque trees. The other bird was always so close and yet too far away at the same time. Would he ever catch up to them? Why did he even want to? What did they mean to him? Why were they weaving in and out of reach so much? Did they even notice him? Did they want to lose him on purpose? Or did he mean absolutely nothing to them?

Nothing. Was he nothing?

As his questions grew darker and the dread crawled into his heart, so too did the garden twist and distort. Now they dived past thorny bushes, crooked trees, and broken and decrepit statues. He knew with unwavering certainty that he had been led into a terrible part of the garden. A part where secrets were kept and the ugliness of humanity was shoved under a rug. Or underneath the pitch black, coal like soil in this case. 

If he were to dig here, with his small yet ever sharp talons, what would he find? What did he want to find? Did he even want to find anything at all?

Interrupting his downward spiral, the shadow finally turned backwards towards him in mid flight. Their eyes caught and the boy froze in place. Well, as much as a bird could while still remaining safely in the sky.

I look at you, you look at me.

Milk and roses, squeaky clean.

Well, you're the best I've ever seen,

And I'm your dying beauty queen.

It wasn’t a shadow at all. They were a Dove. One so beautiful he would be enchanted by them if it wasn’t for the shadow still hung over their face like a never ending veil. It seemed some of the mystery would always remain. He opened his beak to speak to them, to hopefully finally reach out to them, yet just as quickly as they had the first time they turned away and took off into the wind.

He stayed frozen. Rattled to his very core. He simply just floated there and watched as the Dove flew up into another fountain, this one almost entirely covered in heavily thorned vines and dark green ivy that held the faintest hint of a deep purple amongst its leaves, and perched on the black brimstone Swan statue at the top of it. 

His momentary fear slowly but surely metamorphosed into an unbidden anger as he took in the sight. The rejection. The dodging deceitfulness. The everything. He fluffed up his feathers and rose up in order to dive towards the Dove.

Only to be denied once more as the Dove easily dodged and flew back into the brighter, lovelier part of the garden. The boy cried out in lonely agony but did not let it deter him.

He followed once more, slower this time around. Carrying the weight of something he did not know of quite yet.

When he finally caught up once again, they were now at the largest fountain in the entire garden. At least thrice the size of the two that had come before it. And instead of the usual statue at the top, there was a gigantic swan. A live one. Ever so alive and ever so vibrant. They had soft pink and peach markings and beak replacing the usual oranges and yellows of most Swans. They took one loving glance towards the Dove he had spent so long chasing after before sweeping them up into their wings. Almost like a mother hen seeking to hide her chick from the dangers of the world.

L.O.V.E. L.O.V.E.

L.O.V.E. E.V.O.L.

L.O.V.E., do you love me?

L.O.V.E., love is evil.

Yet he couldn’t help the sneaking suspicion that this swan was a danger to the world. The peaceful aura of them and this entire garden both carried an undertone of unparalleled peril. One that choked him from afar and almost caused him to lose altitude. If he were to fall, he wondered if his body would hit the rocks and his blood would stain the purity of this lighter part of the garden. If that were to happen, perhaps they would shove him aside in the darker part of the garden and bury him under its jet black fountain.

Just as his breaths were shortening and the Swan was beginning to look his way he heard the strange song of a Mockingbird. The song was as soothing as a lullaby and as homely as a bedtime story. He felt three pairs of talons gently clasp onto him but he did nothing to fight them. Nor did he want to. They carried him away from the ever elusive Dove. Away from the overbearingly powerful Swan. Away from that garden and all it’s mysteries entirely.

They were now in a regular old forest. Untrimmed and wild. Perfectly and welcomingly flawed. The three birds landed in a large nest, covered in little trinkets and knick-knacks, obviously home made by the three of them. They placed him lovingly into the center and took a few steps back so that he could better observe his surroundings.

The Mockingbird was the first one he saw, them smiling at him as much as someone with a beak possibly could. Next he saw the other two, an Ibis perched on the thick branch beside them instead due to their somewhat larger size and a Falcon that tilted their head curiously at him. These three birds were strangers. Complete and total strangers to him. Yet he felt as if he had known them almost his entire life.

Then the kind Mockingbird leaned in to nuzzle their beaks together as everything went white.

Whiteness.

A slap in the face type regaining of consciousness.

The usual, when one is suddenly awoken in the middle of the night.

“Oh gosh! Sorry kiddo, did I wake you?” A man leaned over him and his bed, a hand outstretched towards the dim lamp. As if he were about to turn it off.

“Pops?” Squeaked the little boy, voice hoarse.

“Ah, sorry!” He whispered, protectively wrapping the child tighter in his warm blankets, “I didn’t mean to wake you, we just heard you cry out and I wanted to make sure you weren’t having one of your nightmares again.”

“I don’t think it was a nightmare...I don’t really know what it was...”

“That’s okay, son. But remember we’re just down the hall if you need anything, okay?”

“Yes, papa.”

The man beamed as the proud father he was and finished his previous task of turning off the lamp. He shuffled softly back out the door, trying not to step on any creaky floorboards as he went. Before he was out the door entirely he leaned back to give one last hushed statement. “Try to get some more sleep. Love you.”

“Love you too.” The little boy whispered back, barely loud enough for his father to catch.

The eight year old wondered again, as he usually tended to, if he was being a burden. Had he disturbed his father’s rest? Had he disturbed the other two’s as well? He let out a resigned sigh and turned over to try and get more comfy. It would be at least a few hours until morning, maybe he could try for a more peaceful and a less eventful dream.

That had been eighteen years ago. And it was just the start of something much bigger than the little boy could have ever imagined. Not even in his wildest, most prophetic dreams. And prophetic they were.

A day in the dark, a murdered afternoon, yeah.

Oh baby, darling, how I'd love to become your suicide blonde.

To lie beside my Romeo, oh what a wicked way to go.

A/N: Hopefully it turned out okay. ^ ^ “” This marks the first official chapter of my first ever fanfic! How exciting yet also terrifying lol. If ya’ll have any questions about it or anything don’t hesitate to ask. Also!!! This fic is now dedicated to @accidental-sanders who has been kind enough to listen to all of my ramblings and musings for this AU and fic. I enjoy our conversations! ; 3

Tag List:

@accidental-sanders 

@ren-allen

@noneed4thistbh

@virgil-the-void-kitten

@totalwhovian

@bandgeek82002-love

@allycat31415

@notalwaysthevillian

@cloudchaser7

@iamredxd

@lacrimosathedark

@idon-kno

@darkhumourandfandoms

@phangirlandkilljoy

@nikova-eve

@rebelrewriter

@chaoticpanpastelle

@simreaper98

@adroolingmaw

@iloveallthegays

@corrupt-ink-denials

@all-of-them-sanders

@6-daughter-of-a-witch-6

@angelicakaiba

@blobdad

@bi-sappy

@clara-oswald-333

@friendly-neighborhood-murderer

@randomcrew

@demon-of-sparkles

@transdimentionalapocolypse

@maybe-one-day-i-will-be-okay

@dxlphmax

@aikitty

@comicsimpson

Roceit Greek Hero AU

Where Roman is a Greek hero(maybe a Demigod one maybe not) that is sent on a quest to kill the nearest Medusa, who is Deceit. Everyone thinks that Deceit is killing people by turning them into stone using his glare but actually it turns out that he’s just so good at sculpting that he makes all of his creations look hyper realistic. Roman, a known patron of the arts, decides to drop everything and sponsor(and probably also be his muse) instead.

So we know Virgil has his pet spider...

But what if!!! All of the other sides had bug buddies as well???

Patton- Is a friendly little bee keeper! He has a few hives he looks over like a mother hen.

Roman- Has an entire butterfly garden! The other sides love visiting it to unwind amongst the beautiful flowers and butterflies.

Logan- Has several different beetles housed in terrariums upon his bookshelves! Beetles are the kind of bug with the most species variants after all and he loves researching them.

Deceit- Has a centipede that is bffs with Remus’ millipede! Also has a wasps nest that is constantly changing location whom he loves to send over to pick on Patton’s bees.

Remus- Has a millipede that is bffs with Deceit’s centipede! Also has an eclipse of moths that flutter around him as if he himself is a lightbulb. He loves to sneak them into Roman’s butterfly garden as his little spies.

E.V.O.L Chapter 1 - Are You Satisfied?

Chapter Summary: A now fully grown Virgil goes to a meeting his parents set up with one of the city’s resident matchmakers, one Logan Sumner. Much more importantly, at least in his own opinion, he gets to meet the guy’s rather adorable familiar.

Warnings: Cussing, mention of past child death.

Pairings: Hints of one-sided analogical.

Word Count: 5k+

Chapter followed by Author’s Note then Tag List under the read more:

I was pulling out my hair the day I got the deal.

Chemically calm.

Was I meant to feel happy,

That my life was just about to change?

It was a tepid fall afternoon. The changing of seasons had not yet fully begun, leaving everyone waiting by a hair's breadth for the drop in temperature they've desired during the grueling summer months to finally arrive. Most trees still had their lackluster greens yet a few were beginning to step into their fancy new yellow and orange hues.

This certainly wouldn't be the scenery one would normally imagine for the beginning of a horror story...

Yet one cannot choose the perfect timing for when such situations are thrust upon you, as our current protagonist would soon find out for himself.

Speaking of which, here he drags himself along now. Scuffing his worn out converses on the pavement as he makes his way slowly to an appointment he oh so dreads is one Virgil Spurling.

He usually doesn’t visit this part of the city, known as Facilier Drive, for its clustered and cluttered buildings that look like they’re attempting to climb one another tend to set off his fear of crowds. Eugh, crowds. Yet his three annoying, doting parents insisted this was for the best and if he was anything Virgil was a man that knew how to survive. Pissing off a trio of well known, powerful supernatural beings certainly didn’t seem good for his health.

Now, don’t get him wrong - Virgil absolutely adored his parents. Those three adopted and raised him when no one else would. In fact, he would much rather be back at his comfy, spacious house hanging out with them than where he was heading right now. Which was- Which was-

Virgil sent a rock flying with his foot with irritation at the very thought of it. It stopped just short of crashing through a nearby store window. He wished the stupid stone would have hit it’s target so maybe he would have been arrested for vandalism or something and could have an excuse to get away from this place. But alas, no cheery coppers for him today. Instead, he was faced with this.

He pauses in front of one of the many store windows, seeing an array of bottles and jars filled to the brim with luminescent liquids. Slowly, his eyes drift toward the dreaded hanging sign. Please don’t be the place. Please don’t be the place.

His prayers are, as always, unanswered. The well-crafted, oak wood sign reads “Sumner’s Specialties : Potions, Hexes, and More” just as he feared it would.

“Dammit.” He hisses under his breath and pulls his hood further over his head. That was definitely the name his pops had told him over breakfast that morning. Meaning he had to go inside, despite how much he didn’t want to. Loathed to even.

People like to tell you what you're gonna be.

It's not my problem if you don't see what I see.

And I do not give a damn if you don't believe.

My problem, it's my problem,

That I never am happy.

It's my problem, it's my problem,

On how fast I will succeed.

A matchmaker! Why had he let them talk him into this again? It didn’t make any sense why he would need one, he was perfectly fine just being with his family. He didn’t need- He didn’t want-

Virgil was startled out of his troubled thoughts by the sound of the little silver doorbell ringing as it was abruptly swung open. A man around his age was glaring down at his hunched form with an upturned nose. The infamous matchmaking witch doctor himself.

“No loiterers allowed today, I have appointments to attend to.” He scoffed, sounding irritated about having been interrupted at whatever he was doing prior.

“I’m not loitering. I just don’t see the point of this dumb meeting.” Virgil snaps back, folding his arms and folding in on himself more. He was already on edge, and now this uptight hoity-toity guy was making it worse. The man seems to do a quick double take then hastily retrieves a small notebook from his pocket and rustles through the pages.

“Ah, then. Virgil Spurling, I take it? Age 26, self-employed, scheduled for a matchmaking meeting?” At Virgil’s quick nod, the guy continues. “You were supposed to be here at noon.” He makes a show of looking down at his watch, “And it is currently one-thirty.”

“Yeah, sorry I’m late I didn’t want to be here.” He shrugs with an air of indifference, but the shakiness of his limbs betray him.

“I see…” He eyes him knowingly before promptly holding out a hand. “My name is Logan Sumner, I will be your matchmaker as per the request of your parents Thomas Proudfoot, Joan Vivas, and Talyn Baines. Although I mainly specialize in hexes, potions, and the like I have also gained a reputation for my fortune telling and reading skills. So I have absolutely no doubt on my ability to find you a suitable match.”

Virgil hesitantly takes his hand while cringing at the sound of this gu-Logan’s rambling. He shouldn’t have left his headphones at home. His beautiful, noise-canceling headphones. “Er, Virgil Spurling… But you knew that already. Wait - All three of them talked to you? I thought it was just pops.”

Logan clicks his tongue, “Yes, all three of your parental figures have each contacted me multiple times. They were...very insistent that I help you.” He stepped back out of the door frame to gesture inside his shop. “Now, if you would please step inside. We have much to discuss.”

Now, normally Virgil detested having to walk in front of others; having his back turned to someone always triggered his fight or flight reflexes. It didn’t appear that he had much of a choice at this particular moment though so he sucked it up and took a couple of steps forward. Before promptly being accosted by a whirlwind of black feathers.

He sputtered and stuttered, trying desperately to both get away and figure out what was happening to him. “O-Oh god-d. W-What-”

“Caw!”

And instantly his fears vanished. He glanced to his shoulder to find a gorgeous crow, only this one had three pairs of legs clasped onto his hoodie and three pairs gleaming eyes staring curiously back at him. He couldn’t resist the urge to coo at it and reached up to scritch at it’s neck lovingly.

“Oh, it’s just you little buddy. You shouldn’t startle people like that, you know? It’s dangerous.”

The familiar cooed apologizingly back in it’s deep, throaty bird voice.

Meanwhile, Logan stood there dumbfounded - glancing back and forth between the two of them. Virgil, who had temporarily forgotten he was there, smiled back up at him. “Is this your familiar? If so, maybe you’re not as bad as I thought.” His smile fell into a teasing smirk.

The warlock’s mouth opened and closed a bit before he abruptly cleared his throat. “Why, yes. He’s-”

“-A Yatagarasu, right?” The client interrupted, his eyes shone with his knowledge and adoration of feathered friends. “I, uh, did I pronounce that right?”

“Indeed. And yes, you did, but-”

“-Does he have a name?”

“Moriarty!” Logan snapped. He gently yet promptly picked the bird, who was still rubbing his head on the newcomer, up from Virgil’s shoulder. “And he usually does not like anyone other than me.”

The beautiful bir-Moriarty let out a sad, soft caw at being taken away. Virgil pouted at him as he detached himself from his master’s arms to sit protestingly on his head. The warlock huffed up at his familiar’s unusual behavior but didn’t make any attempts to remove him from his hair.

High achiever don't you see.

Baby, nothing comes for free.

They say I'm a control freak,

Driven by a greed to succeed.

Nobody can stop me.

Virgil, suddenly remembering where he was and who exactly he was talking too now that his newfound bird buddy had been taken away from him, shrunk back in on himself. “Oh, ah sorry. “

He scratched awkwardly at the back of his neck. “I’m a bit of a ‘bird person’.” He made air quotes to show he wasn’t too sold on the term. “Most people don’t like me...but most birds do. Though I don’t really know why. I’m pretty unlikeable across the board.” He shrugged then rubbed his hands together nervously

Crap, I already ruined it. Great going, Virge! Now your parents are gonna be mad at you. I don’t want them to be mad I want them to be proud whymustiruineverythingi-

“I see.” The man thankfully interrupted his spiraling thoughts. “Though I do not wish for our appointment to have any further alike interruptions, so I will go place Moriarty upstairs.” The Yatagarasu in question cawed in protest at that but was promptly ignored. “I will be back shortly. Feel free to have a look around the shop while I am gone. However, Do. Not. Touch. Anything.” With that, he spun on his heel and stalked towards the sturdy stairway located in the far corner. His dramatic exit was somewhat hindered, in Virge’s opinion, by the adorable little bird still perched cutely on his head.

Oh well, he mused, at least I’ll have a moment to check out the place in peace.

The first thing he noticed was that two-thirds of the room was entirely covered in bookcases. They made up most of the two back walls along with half of the wall that led up to the staircase his shaky new acquaintance had just ascended.

Pfft. Figures as much. With that bookish, nerdy appearance of his.

The next thing, and perhaps his personal favorite if he was being honest, was that the entire ceiling was actually a map of constellations. Occasionally the stars on it seemed to twinkle curiously at him. Some sort of magic, he assumes. There were also strings of star lights, silvery in their glow, strung across most of the walls and fixtures. They made up most of the light in the shop, aside from a perfectly symmetrical lamp standing proudly beside the desk in the corner.

Wonder if I should get some of those little star lights for my own room. Sure Pops would be absolutely ecstatic if I did.

Virgil continued to glance around a bit more, taking a few careful steps here and there, still uncertain in this unfamiliar environment. There was a glass case of crystals here, a spice rack filled with strange dried plants there, the usual witchy stuff most warlocks would have he supposed. He slowly but surely made his way over towards the desk at the back of the shop.

Now, normally Virgil Spurling was not one to rifle through other’s stuff without their explicit  permission, and yet today...right here in this particular shop...

His instincts were telling him to make sure this guy properly checked out.

Though, of course, his parents had been the ones to find the witch doctor in the first place...

And he trusted them with his life.

With his entire existence, actually...Still, something seemed…

Off.

Resolute now in his decision, he treaded forward head first.

Lying on the shelves above the desk were the usual certificates and awards. Including ones that must have been from the man’s childhood, such as a “Best Little Potion Maker’s” award that had a cauldron mascot with tiny arms and feet posed proudly on top of it. On the desk itself were assorted papers, documents, a telescope-shaped pen holder, a laptop-

Wait, a laptop? Virge squinted, peering closer at the grey computer with a thick, navy blue stripe at the bottom. Strange, to see technology in a magic-based establishment. But he guessed most witches now and days would have gotten with the more modern world by now. Even so, it looked rather plain compared to its surroundings.

He decided definitively against trying to hack into a computer or anything equally ridiculous, and continued with his search.

There was also a small calendar with different moon phases on it, and more interestingly, a couple of photographs. One featured both Logan and another man with sunset colored scales on both of his cheeks and purple slitted eyes with orange rims. Both wore cliched witch hats and held a diploma in their hands. Moriarity perched proudly on Logan’s shoulder, while the other had what Virgil remembered was called a Pyrausta curled around his neck. His friend from school, then? Hmmm..

He turned towards the only other photo on the entire desk and promptly gasped.

He has another familiar??? Man, he’s been holding out on me.

Just as he was about to pick up the offending object for further inspection, he heard footsteps coming back down the stairs, and he proceeded instead to fumble himself into the guest chair like a child who was about to be caught with their hand in the proverbial cookie jar.

The man in question was descending the stairs with a sigh, his forehead pinched between his fingers. Virgil couldn’t help but smirk at that, wondering if Moriarity had been hard to convince to stay upstairs. The warlock then straightened, scanned the room, and promptly strode over to where he was sitting. The abruptness of the man’s movements had Virgil sinking into the cushion of his chair and digging his painted black nails into the wood.

Oh god. What if he knows I was snooping more than I should have been? He knows, doesn’t he? Oh dear fuck heknows heknowsandhe’smadatmenowwhatdoIdo-

“My apologies for the wait.” His out of control thoughts were once again interrupted, “Moriarity seems to be rather...temperamental today.” Virgil snorted at that, causing Logan to send him A Look before he continued with, “No worries, however, I have expertly rectified the situation so that we may continue with the interview.”

He sure likes to brag a lot. Wait! What-

“Interview?!” He squeaked, never one to like being put on the spot.

“Indeed, interview. It is part of my ‘matchmaking’ process.” He even did the air quotes, to Virgil’s astoundment and begrudgement, as he spun and sat primly in his own chair on the other side of the desk, “To ensure I know enough information about my client in order to properly place them with another individual that may satisfy their romantic and or sexual requirements.”

Wow, he makes love sound so clinical. Not that I care much for this mushy gushy crap either, but-

“So you’re gonna barrage me with a bunch of stupid one dimensional questions until you think you ‘know’ me enough to cuff me to life with some random stranger?” He aggressively did the air quotes back. “No thank you, I’d rather die alone. In my sleep. Peacefully. Curled under my covers and far away from all of the idiots that litter this world.”

“Charming.” He dryly quipped back,  “And rather thought out on the death part-”

“Death is unavoidable. Life is obsolete.”

“Yes, well,” He pushed his glasses up and shuffled the folders on his desk, “I assure you I am properly thorough in my questioning. Besides,” He plucked out a specific folder and placed it in front of them, “This is just the first step of many.”

“Spare me!” Virge groaned out and threw his head back on the chair, “Just how long is all of this garbage going to take, anyway?” He threw his arms up as well before hunching forward and crossing them.

“I have found that it takes anywhere from a few weeks to a few months of meetings in order to set up a proper match.”

“Merlin and Merryweather, I’m doomed.”

Logan seemed to pause in his perusal of the folder’s contents, raising a critical brow towards his client.

“What?” He snapped, “Isn’t that witch slang?”

“It is..and yet you are neither witch nor warlock.”

He shrugged before looking down at his nails. “I’ve met my fair share.”

“I see…”

“Anyways, didn’t my folks already tell you everything about me or something? Do I really have to do this? I don’t even want to be in a relationship…”

“They only supplied me with the basics, as per the hiring requirement. They also insisted that this matching would be in the best interest of everyone involved.”

“What the hell does that mean?”

“It means, “ He pushed a few papers towards him and swiftly pulled a notepad from a drawer, “Let us start with the interview already, Mister Spurling.”

“Please don’t call me that.”

“Noted. Are there any nicknames or monickers that you do prefer to be called?”

“Uh, Virge. And V, I guess. Pops calls me Little Sparrow sometimes but that’s...just for Pops.”

“Mhmm. And are there any pet names you tend to respond well to?”

“Excuse me? How does that have anything to do with-”

“This is a matchmaking meeting Virgil, in case you were unaware of that. Romantic partners often refer to each other with assigned or improvised nicknames, known as pet names-”

“Ugh, fine. Darling or love or whatever. Certainly not sweetheart or sweetcheeks or anything with the word sweet in front of it. Fuck off with that shit. And if anyone ever calls me babe or baby I might just have to give them a Purply Nurply Swirly.”

“A- A Pur?”

“Trust me dude, you don’t wanna know.”

“Right, then” He cleared his throat, clearly perturbed, “Moving on. Would you look over those sheets and verify the information printed on them for me?” He pointed towards the papers he had pushed across the desk earlier.

Virgil glanced down and sure enough there were sheets containing his personal information. An overall ID, a list of his schooling achievements, and even a brief medical history.

What the actual fuck, dearest parents of mine? Why would you guys give him so much?

He sighed and skimmed over them.

Honestly, fuck my life.

“Yeah, it’s accurate and up to date and all that good stuff.” He snided. Realizing he was probably going to be there a while, he curled his legs up into the chair and rested his chin on his palm. Logan huffed at that, probably worried about the scuff marks that could result from him having his feet on the seat, but Virgil honestly couldn’t care less right now. It was his fault from having him do this stupid questionnaire in the first place.

Cause it's my problem,

If I wanna pack up and run away.

It's my business if I feel the need to,

Smoke and drink and sway.

It's my problem, it's my problem,

If I feel the need to hide.

And it's my problem if I have no friends,

And feel I want to die.

“Wonderful,” He slid the papers back over to his side and shifted them back into the folder, “That means we can skip that portion of the interview.”

“Thank the heavens and ancient mages of old, the sooner I can leave the better.”

“Thank the-?”

“I’ll mix slang however I want. Deal with it.”

“Right, then.” He cleared his throat while placing the folder back in the stack with the others, “What are your core values essential in any possible partner, romantic or otherwise?”

“Getting deep already there, Doc?”

“Well, it is integral that I-”

“I know, geez. I was just teasing. You’re such a wand in the quicksand.”

“A-A wand-?”

“In the quicksand, mister Parrot. Keep up.”

“So I am a Parrot, huh?” He looked both exasperated and amused at the same time. If Virgil was reading him correctly, that is. The warlock so far had seemed like a closed book with an old fashioned diary-lock around it for good measure.

“You’re more of a Finch, actually. Anyways, core values: Compatibility, Honesty, Reliability and Adaptability.” He held up a finger for each one, “But I would like to reiterate that I am Not. Currently. Looking.” He put the other three fingers down at each beat in order to leave just the middle one standing.

Logan stared at him for a moment before sniping back with, “How mature of you. I was looking for something more specific, however.”

“Specifics, huh?” Virge ran a hand through his hair before tucking his bangs behind his ear. “Um, a cool tatt?” At Logan’s sigh, he continued, “Listens to Evanescence?”

“Ah, some rock band name I presume? Do you even know what evanescent means?”

“To like evaporate or fade away quickly or whatever. But a cooler way of saying it. And also a cool band, you should check them out sometime.”

“I-I see. Well, perhaps. I vastly prefer classical orchestral arrangements however.”

“Oh,well, if you like violins then you should check out Lindsey Stirling. She’s a string playing badass. That’s the closest thing to classical I really ever listen to...”

“...Suggestions noted. Moving on with the partner preferences-”

“Oh god, there’s more?”

“Indeed.” He flipped to a new page in his notepad, presumably having already filled that one up with notes, “What pick up lines, if any, have been known to leave you with a positive first impression of the person who said them to you?”

“Pick up lines? Really? Are you shitting me?” Virgil gritted his teeth and balled his fists.

“Yes, pick up lines. Phrases often used as an opening statement of courtship in order to flatter the intended partner” He graciously rolled his eyes, “Such as: Are you made of Copper and Tellurium? Because you are-”

"No, but are you made of Helium, Iodine, Nitrogen, Oxygen, Uranium, and Sulfur? Because that pick up line is absolutely Heinous."

The warlock nearly dropped his pen,"Ah- Oh my-"

"And if you ever try to say something Fluorine, Aluminum, and Selenium like I'm Copper and Tellurium again then I'll go absolutely Boron, Aluminum, Lithium, Sulfur, Titanium, and Carbon, got it?"

The pen promptly fell to the floor, as Logan ran his hands threw his face and hair, pristine and well manicured nails nearly catching on his only two piercings, one being centered perfectly on his forehead and the other being perfectly centered on his bottom lip. "Ah- Yes, um, message...well received.” He cleared his throat for the hundredth time that day and plucked a new pen from the holder, ” And, for the record, may I just say-"

"What?!" Virgil snapped, gearing up for another dreaded pick up line to try and be thrown his way.

"Well, that is…” Logan inhaled, rather shakily, “That was certainly the most elegant way I have ever been insulted in my entire life thus far."

"Oh." Virgil shrugged and deflated back into the cushions, "Thanks, I try."

One life pretending to be,

The cat who got the cream.

Oh, everybody said,

"Marina is a dreamer."

They continued on with more partner questions, which Virgil hated. Then family related questions, which he didn’t actually mind. Until they finally got to the friendship category, which dredged up bad memories for him.

“So, you do not currently have any friends outside of your family members?”

“No, not really. Why? What does it matter? I thought we were here to focus on dumb romantic stuff, not platonic guilt tripping.”

At this point, Virgil had propped his feet up on the other’s desk, much to his obvious disgust. Though the other man had surprisingly not called him out for it yet.

“Indeed, however, all interpersonal relationships need to be reviewed and put into consideration before we are to introduce a new one into the mix.”

“Right, well. I’ll make this short and sweet then. I don’t have any friends other than my parents and cousins. I’ve only ever had one friend. A best friend. And he passed away when we were both kids. End of story.” Virgil listed of, tapping his finger against his palm irritatedly.

“Oh.” He sent a fleeting look towards the photo perched on the desk, “My condolences. I could not even begin to imagine how detrimental that could be for a-”

“Thanks, yeah, utterly damaging. Still seeing a therapist ‘til this day. Can we move on now or?” He gestured a ‘hurry up’ motion before crossing his arms for the hundredth time that day. They were eventually going to get glued together like that someday, like what those parents tell to their kids who make silly faces too often.

“Right, of course.” He nodded curtly as he flipped to yet another page in his notepad. How many of those were he going through?, “Well, we’ve been over partner, family, and friends. So next we-”

“Call this a day and I get to go home and finish reading the Poe book I got for my past B-Day?”

“Well, no. We still- Wait, are you referring to Edgar Allan Poe?”

“Duh, gothic poetry is best poetry.”

“The more macabre pieces do tend to be the most fascinating…”

“Exactly.” Virgil winked and sent him a finger gun.

“R-Right.” He fumbled with his pen again but managed to save this one, unlike the last. R.I.P previous pen. You belong to the floor now. “Well, speaking of what you think is best; The next portion of the interview is about you and your personal likes and dislikes.”

“Oh great, I’m back in highschool again making About Me Powerpoints.”

“So I take it you do not like slide presentations, then?”

“Nah, I’d rather do essays. Less people peeking in on my stuff that way.”

“Well,” the warlock preened, “They are the superior form of literature. Though, if structured and utilized properly, a slide presentation could potentially-”

“Ugh, just shoot me, dude.”

“Shoot you?! Since when did you have a gun-?”

“I meant with the questions, ya’ ninnyhammer.”

“Nin- Right. Okay. Questions.”

Are you satisfied with an average life?

Do I need to lie to make my way in life?

Thus began the onslaught of queries that drained Virgil of what little energy he had to begin with. Self loathing 101: your least favorite subject to be hounded about is yourself. So instead Virge changed the topic whenever he could. Switching the focus of conversation over to either Logan or his shop or really any topic other than him and his rebeling, revolting self. Over the course of their talk, Logan seemed to lean in closer and closer to him. Or maybe that was just the claustrophobia kicking in. Who knows.

"So, which one is it?" Virgil cut Logan off mid-sentence again. He was doing that a lot to the witchdoctor, but the man has done his fair share of interrupting him too so really they were even. At least, as far as he was concerned.

"Pardon?" He blinked a few times, as if coming out of a trance.

"You gotta lotta star related stuff hanging around." The emo gestured around at all of the celestial paraphernalia,"So you into Astrology or Astronomy?"

"And you...actually know the difference between the two of them?"

"Obviously. Or I wouldn't be asking that, now would I?" He drummed his fingers impatiently on the desk.

"Well,” The other adjusted his tie,” I was just making sure. Since most people I have met-"

"Just answer the question, man."

"Astronomy.” He scoffed, “Obviously."

"Oh thank the Titans."

"Thank the-?"

"The gods just weren't enough for that one.” Virge chuckled,” Had to thank someone of even higher power."

"So then, I take it you do not care for Astrology that much?"

"Well yeah, it's a bunch of bull malarkey. Plus it ignores a lot of the other good constellations out there.” He shifted in his seat, almost jitteringly, “ Like Apus, Aquila, Columba, Corvus, Cygnus, Grus, Pavo, Tucana..."

"You...certainly like birds, do you not?" He tilted his head with a signature smirk of his own.

"Er. Um. Yeah? Kinda?" Virgil twisted his hands together, before throwing them out again,"Why? Huh? That such a bad thing if I do? You've got a bird familiar yourself! So you obviously like them too..."

"Oh, of course!” Logan automatically stiffened in his seat, finally sitting up straight after awhile of leaning forward,” I assure you I was not being hypocritical or anything of the sort. I was merely being-"

"Analogical?"

The warlock took a shallow breath,"Yes." Then proceeded to whisper, "I want to be the Cepheus to your Cassiopeia."

"Huh?” Virgil perked up himself,” What was that?"

"Nothing!" Logan hurriedly snapped then cleared his throat, "It was nothing. It appears we have let ourselves get far too sidetracked so far. These tangents have gone on long enough. Let us continue with the likes and dislikes part of the interview, shall we?"

"Yeah, okay, whatever." He sighed out and slid dejectectedly down back into a slump.

After that, they finished up the interview at a faster pace. Both of them were in much more of a rush, not that they weren’t before. But some sort of shift in the overall atmosphere of the room had occurred that was now stifling and strangling the two men. They felt that they wouldn’t be able to breathe until they were away from one another. Both for different, entirely separate reasons…

“Alright, and that will conclude today’s meeting. Thank you for your cooperation-”

“I wouldn’t exactly call it cooperating, but sure.”

“And please come again soon. I mean!” Logan squeezed his nose before hastily retrieving a pad of sticky notes from one of the drawers, “Please actually be on time for our next meeting, which will be two days from now at noon.” He handed the sticky note over to Virgil and stood up to offer a handshake.

“Noon again? Yippee Ki-yayyyyyy.” He sarcastically jazz-handed, gently smacked Logan’s hand away, and pulled his hood back over his head. “Can’t wait to see you again. Oh wait, I can and will. Later, calculator.”

With that, he swiftly strode over towards the door on his way towards much deserved and well earned freedom.

Back onto the street, the tightly wound and partly overlapped buildings of Facilier Drive surrounded him once more. Now, after being stuck in a small shop for more than a few hours, they no longer gave him as much anxiety. Instead, they conveyed to him the promise of heading home. And so home he went, more pep in his step now that he was headed towards a welcome, familiar place instead of a new, frightening one.

He stepped out of Facilier Drive, crossed through the always sweet smelling Merryweather Avenue, and headed into blissful Evangeline Lane. Now, Evangeline Lane was a neighborhood with reasonably well off occupants, yet they all stayed in touch with their friendly neighbors and were generally much less stuffy than most rich folks tended to be. It personally also happened to be the very neighborhood that Virgil had happily lived in most of his life. He stopped abruptly at the sixth house on the left and walked straight up the driveway and through the door. Which was wide open, as it usually was this time of day.

“I’m home!” Virgil called out to no one in particular, not even sure if any of his parents were home themselves.

“Welcome back bitch!” Someone shouted before wrapping him up in a surprise hug.

“Damn you, dammy let go-”

“Okay, okay jeez.” They stepped back with a warm grin. “So how was it?”

“Utterly horrible in every conceivable way.”

“That bad, huh.” His dammy, a parental nickname given by him to Joan when he was much younger and was currently starting to regret but was too deep into the habit of to stop now, leaned back and crossed their arms with a frown. Joan was a Valkyrie, a winged warrior overseeing clandestined battles. When they weren’t serving jerks their due justice on the battlefield, they either spent their time writing songs for his parents’ band or lovingly pestering the hell out of him.  “Was there nothing good about it all or-?”

“Well, his Familiar was rather nice, actually. Though I didn’t get to see much of him.”

A devious smirk. “I’m guessing it was some sort of bird.”

“It’s not always-”

Joan gave him a rather pointed look.

“Okay, this time it was but my point still stands.”

“Uh huh, sure kid. Whatever you say.”

“Ugh, I can’t even with you right now. Where’s pops and maddy?”

Joan chuckled before sweeping their arms in a half-hearted grand gesture. “They’re out shopping right now, so you’re stuck with me bitch.”

“Damnit.”

“Language!”

“You cuss all the time!”

They leaned onto the back of the couch and raised an eyebrow. “Your point?”

“It’s just- Ughh.”

His dammy snickered and ran a hand playfully through his hair. “You know I’m just messing with ya’ kid. Why don’t you go upstairs and recharge, you antisocial fuck, and I’ll stay here and help them bring in the groceries, yeah?”

“Yeah, okay.” He shuffled past them, through the living room, and up the stairs. Before he could fully ascend them, he glanced back down at Joan, who was now laying backwards with their top half on the couch and their legs in the air. “Thanks, dammy.”

“No problem!” They shouted back with a wave.

Virgil rolled his eyes fondly at that before continuing his ascent. Finally. Home sweet home and, more importantly, room sweet room. He flopped down on his circular bed, drowning himself in his assorted pillows, blankets, and stuffed animals. Maybe he could catch a short nap before his parents called him down for dinner. He looked down at his clothes and wondered if he should change first but decided fuck it and curled further into his plush nest.

He tried to close his eyes and rest, but unwelcome thoughts kept invading his mind.

Thoughts of how he was so lucky to have the wonderful, supportive family he had and yet he couldn’t help but resent them a bit for making him go through with this matchmaking bullshit. Thoughts of his stupid new matchmaker he was forced to interact with. Thoughts of how the warlock with auburn brown hair and hazel green eyes had started looking at him weirdly throughout the interview. Thoughts of how his birth father, who he didn’t even remember really, had continuously abandoned him until finally his adoptive parents had found him and given him the loving environment he deserved. Thoughts that told him that he didn’t actually deserve it and that they were giving their precious attention to someone who was unworthy of it. Thoughts about his dead friend, the one from elementary school, who he was still mourning to this day. Thoughts that he might have been able to prevent his death, if only he had just been a little more vigilant. Overwhelming thoughts. Troubling thoughts. Thoughts that had no right to torture him the way they did. Thoughts that he eventually but fitfully drifted off too.

Are you satisfied with an easy ride?

Once you cross the line,

Will you be satisfied?

A/N: This just in I’m an awful procrastinator. But if you’ve followed me for literally any amount of time whatsoever this isn’t news at all. X ‘ 3 Anyways, I’ve been feeling a bit better lately so hopefully I’ll be more productive with this. I’ve started writing chapter 3 at least. Sorry for the super long wait!  Hopefully ya’ll like it. ^u ^ “”” 

Tag List:

@accidental-sanders 

@ren-allen

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@totalwhovian

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Sanders Sides Fantasy Ships AUs Ideas!

Moxiety 1- A werewolf Patton who befriends Virgil who he believes is a werewolf as well but is actually an Aswang (vampiric shapeshifter) with a black dog form.

Moxiety 2- Gentle Giant Elf! Patton meets an Angry, Dwarf Orc! Virgil while out on patrol near the borders of their territories. The two misfits form an unlikely bond despite being from warring species.

Roceit 1- Gorgon!Deceit, servant of Athena(snakes on head instead of hair, small tusks, bat wings, claws, lower half snake) VS Empusa!Roman, servant of Hecate(flaming hair, one gold leg and the other one a deer leg, vampiric fangs, fiery wings). They first meet at a council of the Greek gods and goddesses while attending to their respective masters, who coincidentally are good friends with each other and decide to play matchmaker for their servants.

Roceit 2- Manticore! Roman versus Sphinx! Deceit, who are both being made to fill in for the Griffins who normally guard the temple of knowledge.

Analogical 1- Both are artificially created/man made 'humans' from the same lab. Logan, an android (called Log-In) VS Virgil, a golem/Frankenstein's monster (called Sigil).  But Virgil's a lot smarter than most of the scientists give him credit for and Logan is basically the only one in the lab that acknowledges his capabilities.

Analogical 2- Stormy Mother Nature! Virgil and Studious Father Time! Logan who look after the lesser spirits together but never really talked to each other for all that long until now.

Demus 1- Suave, Vampire! Deceit versus Bumbling, Zombie! Remus who both find each other when they’re complaining at a supernaturally inclined bar about the pains of trying to be abstinent from feeding so they don't ‘scare the other creatures’. Turns out Remus doesn’t have blood for Deceit to thirst over and Deceit’s flesh is too cold for Remus to hunger over. A match made in heaven! Or hell, depending on which bar patron you happen to be asking. (Bonus: They adopt a Ghoul kid together aka little Virgil.)

Demus 2- AU where Deceit is a dragon that normally kidnaps prince Roman, who most of the time ends up just saving himself. But one day he accidentally kidnaps prince Roman's twin brother, Remus, instead. He proceeds to be perpetually confused that Remus seems to not want to escape at all and is rather enthused by the prospect of having a gigantic beast as a self proclaimed new friend.

Logince 1- Real magic, in hiding warlock Logan VS fake magic, famous magician Roman. They keep trying to one up each other and also expose each other.

Logince 2- Fairy Prince! Roman meets Royal Diplomat Mer! Logan at a meeting between the all of the world’s different mythological animals. Cue the saying about the Fish falling in love the Bird.

Anxceit 1- Deceit, a Crossroads demon, keeps constantly competing with and antagonizing Virgil, a Nightmare demon, despite them being in completely different departments of Hell. Now, they have been assigned by one of the Archdemons(Remy?) to team up with/work together in order to investigate rumors of Angels(The other sides?) sneaking into Hell.

Anxceit 2- Yin yang, opposing forces AU with Tiger! Virgil and Dragon! Deceit. They rule over two different sides of animal based yokai.

Prinxiety 1- Gargoyle!Virgil and Vampire!Roman who can both only meet each other at night. First met when Roman was fleeing hunters and ended up nesting on Virgil's statue for the day (not knowing it was a living creature lol).

Prinxiety 2- Elegant, Fire Kitsune! Roman versus Fierce, Storm Raiju! Virgil. They keep accidentally crosses paths with each other while doing their respect jobs of cursing humans(Roman) and creating storms(Virgil).

Dukexiety- Misunderstood, Grim Reaper! Virgil versus Chaos Bringing, Lich! Remus. Remus keeps resurrecting people just so Virgil will have to come see him in order to take their souls back.

Royality- Swan Maiden! Roman, who’s been forced into many marriages before but has always daringly escaped, ends up helping a Selkie! Patton who’s never had his skin stolen before now. They first meet each other when the same powerful and influential man captures both their pelts and immediately form a shaky alliance to find a way out of it.

Loceit- Logan, a secret agent tasked to track down and capture aliens VS Deceit, a lizard person slowly but surely making his way in this new world.

 Intrulogical- Forest Guardian, Centaur! Logan verses Trickster of Humans, Satyr! Remus. Logan keeps finding Remus pestering different mortals and having to talk him down each time.

Moraliety- Kelpie!Deceit and Unicorn!Patton. They're both being hunted by a prince wishing to prove himself to his harsh father(Roman?).

Disney Based Sanders Sides Ships AUs Ideas!

Part 1 because this was becoming a long post.

❥ Lady and the Tramp Moxiety AU but with abandoned cat familiar Virgil and neglected dog familiar Patton(his witch keeps paying more attention to other magical creatures they capture than him). Virgil keeps stopping by to warn Patton that 'all witches go for an upgrade eventually' while Patton keeps trying to convince him(and himself) that there's always hope and love in the world.

❥ Roceit Lion King 2 AU but set in modern times with shapeshifters. The dark lands is where the werecats reign while the pride lands are werewolf territory. Roman is the son of the alpha werewolf while deceit is the werehyena from the dark lands that saved his life one day while they were kids. (Patton and Thomas are werewolves. Logan is a werebear that lives in the pride lands. Virgil is a black leopard. Remus is Roman's long lost half brother who's half werecoyote/half puma that was banished to the dark lands. Remy is a fox who lives in the dark lands.)

❥ Analogical Atlantis AU but set in the lost kingdom of Roanoke (based on the Lost Colony but changed a lot for the au) instead of Atlantis. Virgil's people and inherited royal powers are more shadow based instead of water based(They kind of look like dark elves). Logan is a traveling conspiracy theorist with a blog and YouTube channel that leads a team to finding it.

❥ High School Musical Logince AU with Roman who's the top jock in school that secretly wants to perform in the drama club and Logan as the super smart new student that immediately joined the debate team and academic club but has an appreciation for poetry and after meeting Roman has started liking the theater too...

❥ Aladdin Anxceit AU with Deceit as the prince who sneaks out of the castle grounds and has a giant pet anaconda that scares his guards and Virgil as the street rat with a ferret who helps him steal things. Virgil does pretend to be a prince at first to get into the castle BUT  tells Dee who he really is as soon as they're alone together. Together they then both keep up the ruse for a while whenever they're  in front of Deceit's controlling father and his advisors.

❥ Hunchback of Notre Dame Demus AU with scaly, snakey 'deformed' Deceit and gypsy jester Remus. Deceit was kept locked up in the town’s clock tower by his adoptive father due to his snake-like appearance making people think he’s possessed by a demon. Remus is a jester but still leader of the rogue gypsies and is used to taking ‘misfits’ under his wing.

Disney Based Sanders Sides Ships AUs Ideas!

Part 2 because the previous post was getting long.

❥ Prinxiety Maleficent AU with dragon Deceit accidentally adopting prince Virgil despite being his kingdom's enemy and Roman being the neighborhood kingdom's prince who falls for Virgil when he hears him singing in the woods. Virgil likes singing to nocturnal creatures like owls, bats, etc. He thinks they're misunderstood, like his adopted dad. 

❥ Fox and the Hound Dukexiety AU but it's with Nogitsune Virgil and Tanuki Remus who are from rival yokai Japanese student delinquent gangs/yakuza: The Fox Clan versus the Hound Dogs. They fall in love anyways cause screw old family rivalries that no one even remembers how they got started in the first place lol.

❥ Loceit How to Build a Better Boy AU where Deceit accidentally tells a bully he has a boyfriend already so his hacker best friend Virgil hijacks a government experiment and programs the perfect robotic boyfriend for Dee- enter suspiciously perfect new student Logan.

❥ Beauty and the Beast Intrulogical AU but with ancient Duke turned Eldritch Abomination Remus and Paranormal Scientist Logan who's trying to prove himself to the other scientists who ridicule his work. (Also the Gaston is a famous TV paranormal investigator who's actually a big fraud who wants Logan to team up with him.)

❥ Moraliety Snow White AU where Deceit is the assassin known to have many faces whose sent to kill prince Patton so the queen can drink his blood to continue being the fairest in the land. But upon meeting the absolute sweetheart, he instead swears to rip out the queen's heart and deliver it to Patton instead. (Patton appreciates the sentiment but really wishes he just wouldn't kill anyone anymore.) Together, along with some woodland friends, they dismantle the monarchy.

❥ Little mermaid Intruality AU where instead of being the daughter of Triton, Remus is the son of Ursula. (He's half brothers or cousins with Roman, who is a son of Triton.) And Patton is the prince of the nearest kingdom who is starting an organization to rescue wild life because he adores animals. After a fight with Triton's many kids, he gets stuck in plain octopus form and is rescued by Patton. Later, when Patton's ship gets caught in a storm, he decides to return the favor...

Also if I ever do mange to finish the over 20+ chapters I have planned for the E.V.O.L au (and possibly some of the epilogues) then the Sanders Sides Fantasy Ships au ideas I posted would be my next group of ideas to choose from. 

My personal favorites from it are Moxiety 1, Analogical 1, Demus 1 and Demus 2, Logince 1, Prinxiety 1, and Royality. 

So now that Patton is a frog, how about Princess and the Frog AUs with his ships. 👀

* Intruality Prince and the Frog AU. With Frog!Patton and Wild Axolotl!Remus.

* Logicality Prince and the Frog AU. With Frog!Patton and Turtle!Logan.

* Moceit Prince and the Frog AU. With Frog!Patton and Albino Python!Janus.

* Moxiety Prince and the Frog Au. With Frog!Patton and Black Gecko!Virgil.

* Royality Prince and the Frog AU. With Frog!Patton and Fire Salamander/Red Salamander!Roman.

Just, More Princess and the Frog AUs with Patton now please.

E.V.O.L Chapter 2 - On No!

Chapter Summary: Logan is finally done with his workday and can now retire to his living quarter upstairs. He starts reviewing his notes for the day only to find a few inconsistencies and a startling conclusion...

Warnings: Beginnings of Yandere like behavior, mentions of stalking, emotional breakdown, breaking of objects.

Pairings: One-sided analogical.

Word Count: 4k+

Chapter followed by Author’s Note then Tag List under the read more:

One track mind, one track heart.

If I fail, I'll fall apart.

Maybe it is all a test.

'Cause I feel like I'm the worst,

So I always act like I'm the best.

Logan Sumner, self proclaimed magical child prodigy and warlock extraordinaire, always had three cups of coffee throughout his typical work day. One cup before breakfast, one in the middle of lunch, and finally one after his dinner. Dr Sumner was well known in the magical community as a stickler for his routine and the outbursts that were sure to follow if anything trivial ever dared to interrupt said routine. Though the particular interruptions that had occurred earlier that day hadn’t bothered him nearly as much as they should have. Almost as if-

He tightened his lips and jerkily shook his head to rid himself of that train of thought before it could even leave the station. Instead, he steered ever sturdily and steadily forward and into his quaint dining room table’s only occupying chair. It was time for dinner, after all. He whistled out into the air of the sparsely decorated apartment atop his shop for his two wonderful and trustworthy Familiars. 

Moriariy, punctual as per usual, was the first to join him. Flying in from the direction of his bedroom and landing at the other end of the table, where a small plate of little seeds and several lush fruits awaited him. His other Familiar, however, followed along at his typical slower pace. Slinking in from the direction of the stairwell and stopping beside him at the foot of the table, where a larger plate of tenderly cooked meats awaited him.

“Did you have a good run, Sheppard?” Logan asks the Valravn as he runs a gentle hand along the canine’s back.

Sheppard, who was slightly more wild in nature than the Yatagarasu, would occasionally leave the shop for the later half of their work day in order to have a refreshing romp in the nearest forest- the one just outside of Painic Park. Logan never once worried over his return, for his Familiars had never failed him before. Which is one of the many reasons he got along better with them than with his other, more humanoid peers.

The handsome pitch black wolf with scattered feathers along his form, bird’s talons as front legs, and a sharp beak perched at the end of his snout gave a tired out, low swooping nod at the query. His warlock gave him a quick pat on the head for his reply and turned away to focus on his own meal. 

It was a hearty and well balanced dinner of steak and salad, yet Logan could not help but feel as though he was craving something else entirely different. Perhaps it was the usual pull towards his work he so often felt? Nodding along to the notion, he picked up his cutlery in order to dig in. One cannot think well on an empty stomach, as the saying goes. Once he began eating, his polite and surprisingly patient Familiars began to eat their own meals as well.

After dinner he immediately washes the small amount of dishes used during the day. It was best not to let them pile up too much, as he was a man that loathed disorder and messiness.

Moriarty swooped in to help place the assorted plates and glasses back on the shelves while Sheppard strode his way over to the living room to lay between Logan’s grey loveseat and the small brick fireplace. Knowing full well that that seat was where Logan would be spending the next couple of hours as he casually went over the day’s work. 

Moriarty, on the other hand, would spend the time flitting between nesting on the cushion beside him, perching on the back of the loveseat, and resting himself upon Logan’s shoulder. His movements were easily predictable for Logan, who hardly ever got startled by the bird. Well, with the exception of…

The warlock pinched the bridge of his nose as he made his own way into the living room while holding his last cup of coffee of the day, sending Moriarty a look that somehow managed to be questioning, exasperated, and fond all rolled into one as he passed by him.

Why had the bird practically launched himself towards their newest client? Normally, if his Familiars invaded a strangers personal space so abruptly upon first meeting them then that meant that they saw them as a threat and were acting fast to protect their warlock. But that had apparently not been the case at all! Moriarity had....had proceeded to cuddle the darkly dressed man in an overly affectionate and quite frankly rude manner. His Familiars, as he had mentioned to the fellow, usually did not like anyone other than Logan. Only finding exception in long time acquaintances that he held a particular camaraderie with. Especially Moriarty because he was Logan’s first and therefore most bonded. The client in question, however...Had seemed to not mind at all...And had just happily soaked up the bird’s affection towards him. He had taken it all in with an alarmingly charming smile and softened voice that almost made his knees-

He falls into the loveseat, gripping the edge of the cushions with one hand and trying not to spill his fresh coffee with the other as he sits down. Anchoring his thoughts before he lets them set sail into some illusionary sunset. He needed to forget about that odd incident. He needed to start thinking straight again. He needed to get some more work done. 

Don't do love, don't do friends.

I'm only after success.

Don't need a relationship.

I'll never soften my grip.

With a resolved sigh the warlock reached over to the end table beside the loveseat, placed the just barely saved cup atop it’s coaster, scooped up the couple of notebooks that were there, and began looking through his notes on all of his meetings for the day. As he read through them, however, he began to feel unnaturally antsy. He chewed on his bottom lip. He tapped his nails against the cover. He hopped his foot continuously up and down. Sensing his uneasiness, Moriarty lets out a questioning caw soon followed by Sheppard’s concerned woof.  

“I’m fine.” He rasps out, “It’s just…” His eyes flicker towards the second notebook, the one now laying right beside his thigh. The one he would read second. Because he always read everything in chronological order and he would never skip around. Not for anything. Because it was very important that he remained well organized and timely in his work. So he would leave that one for later, for only after he had finished this one first. He would leave it there and he would-

Proceed to snatch it up immediately, entirely disregarding the previous notebook, which promptly and tragically fell onto the floor. Poor first notebook. Your fate belongs with the pen now.

“It’s this.” He hisses out as he flips on over to page thirty two. The beginning of his notes on his noon appointment, who had actually arrived an overwhelmingly terrible amount of one and a half hours late. Which had set him further on edge than he already was after dealing with Misses Stockbean around ten o’clock that morning, who had demanded more Ozian Poppy seeds than the original agreed amount for half the usual price. So understandably, he might have been a tad snappy towards the bloke at first but he had tried to soften at least a little bit after seeing how anxious the poor guy really was. But then, oh then, Moriarty had preceded to act entirely too strange for him which set Logan right back on edge again. After he had calmed his Familiar down with promises of extra fruits at dinner that night if he stayed quietly upstairs for the remainder of the appointment, he had finally been able to start to interview him.

Monday, September 23rd. Virgil Spurling. Age 26. Self Employed. Lives with his three adoptive parents, Thomas Proudfoot, Talyn Banes, and Joan Vivas. Only spends time with either the three of them, or his two honorary cousins Remington Sexton and Otto Toby Haggard. No living friends outside of the family. No current romantic or sexual partners. Has dark brown hair with light brown highlights. Has long bangs that fall over his eyes, sometimes almost covering them completely. Has rather stormy hazel blue eyes that almost appear violet depending on the lighting he is in. Has pronounced dark circles under his eyes- which are concerning. Has a lovely onyx teardrop piercing on his left cheek and a pair of matching dahlia piercings besides his lips. Has rounded, soft pink lips with a thinner upper lip and a thicker, more bitable lower lip and-

Wait a minute, just what kind of notes had he been taking the entire time he was conducting this interview?! He skips ahead two pages and he’s still just on the physical description section. His physical descriptions had always been more concise and to the point before now. He didn’t quite understand what had happened this time in order to change that. He skims ahead more to try and pinpoint any change or clue anywhere in all of this absurdity. 

Has brushed his bangs aside and placed them beside his ear to allow me to see that he has a tattoo behind his ear, on the side of his neck, comprised of a complicated swirl of black roses and thorns. It looks like it would have been painful to get but compliments the structure of the junction between his neck and shoulder nicely. It makes one wonder if he would appreciate someone’s equally difficult yet proudly designed tattoos of assorted constellations across one’s rib cages-

Okay, just why had he started talking about his own tattoos? These notebooks weren’t for some diary-esque documentation of himself. They were for taking professional notes so that he made sure he remembered the most important details of, and information for, all of his assorted clientele. Skip ahead further!

He is surprisingly smart. He is as quick witted as he is sharp-tongued. Metaphorically, of course. Physically, his actual tongue is baby pink and soft, if the few times it has darted out to lick nervously over his lips and teeth are of any indication. He hates pick up lines. Understandable. I find them pointless as well. He. Him. He too has memorized the entire periodic table of elements and is actually fluent in using their abbreviated symbols to make multiple words. Impressive. Breathtaking-

Well at least he seemed to be finally past the physical description now. Yet those strange sentences kept popping up and intertwining themselves where they had no right to be. Even if that had been rather breathtaking at the time it still...It still didn’t explain...Skip ahead! Skip ahead!

He lost his only friend at much too young of an age. I couldn't even begin to imagine how he must feel. How I would have felt were I in his place. He deserves to be comforted and well looked after. He needs a hug. A nice long, extended hug. Perhaps, seeing as I am the only one here with him as of the moment and thusly the only person currently available to do so I could-

Woah, woah, woah. Slow down there past Logan! One should never initiate physical contact with their client without their express consent. He knew that, of course. He knew that and yet he had written...He had written far too much about himself, is what he had done. Wasn’t he supposed to be finding Virgil a suitable romantic and/or sexual partner? How could he do that if he was too busy writing about himself and what...what he wanted? And wait, he wanted? He...yearned? And just for what, exactly? Skip-

He likes poetry. Specifically gothic poetry. That is one of my many favorites as well. I have a rather extensive collection in my shop that I could share with him-

Oh Merlin. 

He prefers Astronomy as well. Rather surprising, actually, given his darker appearance and habit of speaking- I had wrongly pegged him for someone much more superstitious. A nice surprise. A welcome one. He seems hyper fixated on the plethora of bird-associated constellations which is highly endearing. There is a new large telescope being currently housed in the recently opened observatory section of the Morph Museum, which is not that far of a walk from my shop. Perhaps I could take him-

Oh Merryweather.

He likes bath bombs and the hand soap that foams. He likes collecting seashells and storing little hidden trinkets in them. He likes feeling the gentler tides lap across his feet but dislikes ever actually going any further into the water unless someone he trusts is there with him. Meanwhile, I personally haven’t been out metal detecting in a while maybe I could go with-

Oh Mages of Both Old and New!

I know exactly what I want and who I want to be.

I know exactly why I walk and talk like a machine.

I'm now becoming my own self-fulfilled prophecy.

Oh, oh no, oh no, oh no, oh!

Logan tosses the notebook back down onto the couch, a notably much safer place than the floor, and lets out a choked, broken sob. Using his hands to haphazardly tug on his hair, he somehow hopes to numb his ever spiraling thoughts like a brain freeze might do so after drinking a cold beverage too fast but it’s not working.  Nothing’s working and-

And there’s a lick on one of his hands. He blinks aside a few tears he hadn’t even realized had fallen in the first place and sees that Sheppard had risen to his height by standing on his hind paws and was now trying to gently get his warlock to stop abusing his own scalp. Meanwhile, Moriarty was darting back and forth across the room, obviously trying to locate the source of Logan’s clear distress. He manages a breathy chuckle at that despite his current haggard condition and decides to wrap his arms gently around Sheppard’s feathered scuff instead.

“Really,” he praises, “What would I do without you two?” 

Sheppard huffs back at him, which roughly translated to Nothing, obviously. And causes Logan to break out into a more genuine laugh this time before sinking to his knees and bringing the pup softly down with him. He evens his breathing out as Shep licks consolingly at his hands and arms. “What am I going to do, boy?” he mumbles as he uses his dress shirt’s pocket handkerchief to dab at the stray tears with one arm as he still clings to the wolf with his other. “This can’t be happening, right? It just can’t.” He gets no response at that, however, probably since the poor canine can’t entirely grasp the emotional severity of the situation. 

Deciding to just toss the handkerchief into the nearest bin instead of sending it through the wash as per usual whenever he dirtied it, he finally lets go of Sheppard, stands back up, and brushes off his pants legs. Upon glancing towards the looming form of the notebook where it still lay tauntingly on the couch’s cushions, he guffaws a more strained and panicked laugh as his thought train not only takes off down the tracks but also entirely derails off course.

If you are not very careful,

Your possessions will possess you.

TV taught me how to feel,

Now real life has no appeal.

“What have I always told myself, hm?” He gestures wildy, causing Moriarty to stop his frantic searching in order to look towards him and for Sheppard to perk back up into attention as well. “What have I always told myself even way back in school? Even though other more hormonal mages always disagreed with me, what were the words I always stuck by, huh?” The two Familiars shared a brief confused look between the two of them.

Logan stops to run a hand through his hair in hopes of straightening it up a bit from it’s tousled state. “What words not only got me through school but also allowed me to reach my full potential and achieve the placement of top student?” He allows himself to take a moment to stroke a hand over each of the surfaces of all the awards aligning the top shelf of his smallest bookcase, located on the other side of the loveseat than the end table was. These were the backups of the awards he kept in his shop downstairs, just in case a particularly rowdy customer ever managed to break one. After his fingers left the “Best Little Potion Maker’s” one, he pushed himself away from the area entirely and headed swiftly towards the hallway in front of the staircase. 

It has no appeal.

It has no appeal.

It has no appeal.

It has no appeal.

It has no appeal!

His ever attentive Familiars followed worriedly behind him until they stop just before the steps. He flourishes a harsh, pointed finger at the few portraits hanging on the wall there. “What words were going to eventually get me all the way to the top of Heartwish City’s very own magical community? But are now just...Just dead pipe dreams!” His two most trusted creature companions, still ever so confused by his current trail of logic, made hushed little questioning noises.

Ripping the topmost portrait off of the wall, he began to hiss his next words at it as if the object itself had managed to personally offend him. “Focus on your work. Never fall prey to your feelings. You need to be successful in life more than you need to personally engage in any inane romantic or sexual endeavors.” Merlin’s painted facade stared blankly and unchangingly back at him. In utter retaliation at the silence, he tosses it frame and all down the stairs. Upon remembering Logan’s aversion to untidiness, Sheppard slinks slowly down them to go collect the scattered remains.

Don't want cash, don't want card.

Want it fast, want it hard.

Don't need money, don't need fame.

I just want to make a change.

“Lot of good that did me, boys!” He continues to deliriously shout out, “All these years and not even so much of an inkling of said feelings and yet over the course of one idiotically ineffable day I’ve managed to gain what is essentially a childish schoolyard crush!” He managed to breathe out all in one go before slumping tiredly against the side of the stairwell.

In a Eureka! moment Moriarty begins to excitedly flit to and fro while hurriedly chirping at his warlock. Almost too fast for him to be able to sense the meaning of. “Wait, slow down a bit Mori. What are you-” More hard to decipher chirps, “Hold on, move in? What on earth gave you that idea? No, he’s not going to-” More persistent caws this time, “Well, of course we both like him, I’ve literally just now established that already and- And wait just a moment.”

He scoops the bird gently into his palms. “You liked him first, didn’t you?” One short caw confirmed a resounding Yes. for him. “Did you know, then? Could you have possibly sensed that he’s perfect for me? For us?” He stutters out a breathy laugh, “That’s what that whole debacle was about, wasn’t it?” The crow coos soothingly back up at him and gives him a love bite on the bridge of his nose. Logan releases Moriarty back into the air, along with the emotions connected to his previous outburst, and leans back to place his hands firmly on his hips while he stood proudly back up on his own two feet.

“Just look at me, behaving so ridiculously over the top for such a trivial matter. Throwing a temper tantrum even! Just what would my old professors say, if they saw me now?” He shuffles over to the other side of the hallway where a small cabinet is and opens one of the drawers. “After all, I am more than perfectly capable of handling more than one problem at a time, am I not?” There was both a cheerfully agreeable caw and howl at that, which caused him to finally smile happily again. “And besides, it might not even last all that long. Crushes and mere infatutations are usually short lived!” He rifles through the drawer’s contents until he finds another portrait that was dusty and slightly cracked in one of the upper hand corners. Shutting the drawer and striding back over to the stairwell he holds it up to see if it’ll fit in the arrangement. “Yes, this’ll do perfectly.”

I just wanna change.

I just wanna change.

I just wanna change.

I just wanna change.

I just wanna change!

“And well, if it does last longer or just so happens to escalate further, then...” He concludes as he places the portrait on the spot with a short spell to fix the hook he had broken earlier and steps back to admire the new set up, “His parents never specified that I couldn't be the one I chose for his match, now did they?” Morgan Le Fey, now sitting atop the others as if on a throne made up of the mages, gives him a subtly wicked and tilted smile in response. 

He mirrors her expression for the briefest of moments before spinning on his heel and heading towards the only window on the top floor of his building. The warlock steps into his bedroom,  pushes the curtains aside, and undoes the latches in the center. As he thrusts the two panes wide open, Moriarty joins his side once more.

 “Ah, perfectly punctual as always, Moriarty.” he praises as the bird lands on the back of his hand before leaning in to whisper conspiratorially to him, “Before any new endeavor one embarks on in their life, they should always research properly first, yes?” After his Familiar nods in agreement he continues onwards, “And I’m sure you want to see him again soon yourself, right?” Upon realizing who his warlock was talking about, the bird fluffs up his feathers in anticipation. “Exactly, so this all makes perfect sense.” He waves away any other possible negative notions with a sweep of his hand and turns swiftly back towards the open window.

The sun was setting now. The doctor briefly recalled a time, as a kid, where he had stayed up long past his bedtime not only to see the sunset but to also test out his newest telescope. Back then, before he had properly entered into his magical schooling, he had been far more into scientific pursuits at the time. Though he still held a liking towards them now that he was older, what really currently consumed him was his work with all things magical and mythical. Though now, after today, a new beast of a subject was rounding the corner to have it’s turn eating away at his soul. Maybe, just maybe, if he was lucky enough, he could manage to take a bite out of it first.

“Alright, Moriarity, you know what you must do.” He interrupted the nostalgic scene and swung the arm the Yatagarasu was perched upon out the window and into the open picturesque evening air. His voice took on a booming echo, “Go forth and gather all that we must know, Though never your own cover you must blow.”

All three of his Familiar’s eyes flashed with the royal blue color of Logan’s magic before the third eye disappeared into the feathers of his forehead and his third leg was tucked away into the feathers of his tail. They both breathed a collective sigh of relief at another spell well cast, despite the roller coaster of emotions that they had all been through that day. Moriarty gave him one final nod in reassurance of their plan and took off into the ever changing dusk sky.

The warlock stayed by the window long enough to watch until his Familiar’s form disappeared over the horizon then set about closing and locking it back up. His other Familiar trudged upwards from the stairs, through the small apartment, and into his bedroom. Giving him a huff to announce his presence. 

“Oh, you cleaned it up?” he asked the Valravn, who butted his head against his thigh, “Thank you, though I could have gotten it myself later.” A grunt followed that and he chuckled as he scratched behind the canine’s ears, “Yes, yes you're a good boy. Now let’s head to bed, shall we?” Sheppard pulled away from the affection to howl at the window. “Moriarty? He’s...running an errand. He’ll be a while.” To which he received the most pointed look a dog’s face could ever muster. He shivered as he felt the intrinsically implied Can’t hide things from me, we’re bonded. and cleared his throat to correct himself, “He’s watching over our dear new acquaintance, Virgil. Don’t worry, you’ll be able to meet him yourself soon.” 

Much more satisfied by that answer, Shep hopped up onto his rightful spot at the foot of the bed. Where he settled down to wait as Logan went through his nightly routine of partially getting ready for the next work day, cleaning himself up, and changing into his pajamas. 

Meanwhile, the coffee mug in the living room on the dark wooden end table still sat forgotten and untouched. Where it would no doubt remain throughout the entire night.

I'm gonna live, I'm gonna fly.

I'm gonna fail, I'm gonna die.

I'm gonna live, I'm gonna fly.

I'm gonna fail, gonna die, die, die, die.

A/N: So I’m still a dirty rotten no good procrastinator. But! Hopefully it’ll help make up for the wait just a little bit that I’ll be posting both chapters 2 and 3 in quick secession. Along with a short, one-off Creativitwins fanfic (coming soon) based off of the latest episode (SVS Part 2). Hope you’ll enjoy! ^ . ^ “”” Also, I’ll no longer be going through the original post for reblogs to add to the taglist. So if anyone wants to be added to it please dm or ask me and let me know! ;3

Tag List: 

@accidental-sanders 

@ren-allen

@noneed4thistbh

@virgil-the-void-kitten

@totalwhovian

@bandgeek82002-love

@allycat31415

@notalwaysthevillian

@cloudchaser7

@iamredxd

@lacrimosathedark

@idon-kno

@darkhumourandfandoms

@phangirlandkilljoy

@nikova-eve

@rebelrewriter

@chaoticpanpastelle

@simreaper98

@adroolingmaw

@corrupt-ink-denials

@all-of-them-sanders

@6-daughter-of-a-witch-6

@angelicakaiba

@blobdad

@bi-sappy

@clara-oswald-333

@friendly-neighborhood-murderer

@randomcrew

@demon-of-sparkles

@transdimentionalapocolypse

@maybe-one-day-i-will-be-okay

@dxlphmax

@aikitty

@comicsimpson

@agatheringofbees

@mediocrity-at-best

@babybunnyquake

@sanders-sides-uncorrect-quotes

@screechingflapbiscuitpeach

@hunter-shyreen

@randomfactscenteral

@charlineedstea

@bee-a-queen

@thatonepersonwhoshippeople

@virgil-is-baby-boi

@chocococo16

@softboisnek

@forbiddensender

@tinylightthingtrash

@andreaissy

@girl-from-pluto

@loveyousweets

@im-a-space-gay

@kai-the-person

E.V.O.L Chapter 3- Living Dead

Chapter Summary: After a bit of a rough morning, Virgil decides to visit the grave of his long dead best friend... Meanwhile, Patton has finally graduated and is ready to take on his first assignment as a newly appointed cupid!

Warnings: Beginnings of Yandere like behavior, stalking, watching other’s without them knowing, wounds, stabbing, blood.

Pairings: One-sided moxiety.

Word Count: 4k+

Chapter followed by Author’s Note then Tag List under the read more:

Everyday I feel the same.

Stuck, and I can never change.

Sucked into a black balloon.

Spat into an empty room.

The next day Virgil found himself waking before even the roosters themselves would have crowed.

Rubbing the sleep from his eyes and cursing his wishy washy biological clock, he wondered if it was too early to grab a bite of breakfast. He had missed dinner the previous day, after all, having been too tired from being forced to socialize for so long with someone so new. His parents would probably understand if they caught him. They always did.

He shrugged and slung one of his lighter weighted blankets over his shoulders before taking a few shaky steps away from his bed. His legs felt like jello, making it tempting to just go back to the safety of his little nest and spend all day inside of his room. But the obnoxious rumbling of his ungrateful stomach made that nearly impossible. So to the kitchen it was instead.

Virge tried his best not to step on any creaky floorboards on his way out of his room and down the stairs. If his parents weren’t already awake, then he certainly didn’t want to be the loud, fumbling asshole that actually woke them up. Heaven knows they deserved all the rest they could get. They did so much for him. And for the whole neighborhood, for that matter.

Wonder if there’s any of those blueberry bagels left. He pondered as he descended the final step.

He went past the living room and into the kitchen, where upon after he entered, Virgil was immediately met with his answer.

“You’re up early, V.” Talyn said around a mouthful of their buttery bagel, “Can’t sleep?”

“More like slept too much.” Virgil corrected as he joined them at the breakfast bar.

Talyn was a Banshee, a wailing ghost that had the ability to warn others of approaching death.Though, they usually used their glorious screeching voice for the screamo parts of their band’s songs instead. Once in a blue moon however, especially back when Virgil had done something particularly rebellious when he was a teenager, he had had the pleasure of witnessing firsthand the more negative side to their voice. Between his maddy’s booming voice and the sad puppy dog eyes his pops had sent his way-it was easy to see why his version of a ‘rebellious phase’ had been cut short. 

“I’d chastise you for your poor sleeping habits but I’m honestly not one to speak myself.”

“You’re a ghost, you don’t even need to sleep.”

“And yet here we are.” They waved the hand holding the bagel, sending some crumbs flying, “With me taking afternoon naps and staying up all night like a heathen.”

“God, same.”

“We’ve rubbed off on you too much, little one.” Talyn chuckled, putting a hand on his shoulder, “Me and Joan. Why don’t you take after your papa more too?”

“Pops is too sunshiney for me, maddy. I’m half convinced he’s made of literal sunbeams at this point.” Virgil sneered out with a fond undertone as he gently lathered butter on his own bagel, “I’m more of a punk moonchild, ya’ know?”

Maddy was the affectionate nickname he had given Talyn as a kid. He was pleased to later find out that, unlike with dammy, other kids sometimes used maddy for their nonbinary parents too.

His maddy chuckled at that, patted his shoulder, then returned to devouring their own breakfast. They both sat in a comfortable, companionable silence for a while as they finished up their food and took in the morning sights through the wide kitchen window. Then as the birds started up their autumn songs and the sun started it’s slow trek over the horizon, they both got up to put away their trash and tidy their mess. As he was putting his blanket over the couch for later cuddling-while-watching-tv purposes, Virgil’s eyes unfortunately happened to land on the calendar hanging next to the entryway. The sight of a certain circled reminder of a date he had been trying to forget caused a past pain to resurface just as hot and stabbing as the first time it had ever appeared in his heart.

He reentered the kitchen with a familiar, haunting grimace. Talyn sent him a fleeting confused look before it morphed into one of understanding instead.

“It’s next week, isn’t it?” They breathed softly, “The anniversary.” Their tone held an unnecessary weight of guilt. For even though they were a Banshee, they had not been able to foresee that death. The most important one. The one that had hurt their child so much at such a young age.

“Yeah,” Virgil choked out, tears threatening to brim his eyes, “If...I’m being honest...I’m not sure if I can make it, this year.”

“Well maybe…” They bit their lip and shifted on their feet nervously, “Maybe you can just go now? It might be less pressure, if it’s not the day of.”

“I-I don’t know, maddy. I’m still kind of worn out from yesterday.”

“Ah, the matchmaker meeting. I almost forgot about that.” Talyn moved to lean back on the counter, “How did that go?”

Virge sucked in a breath, blinked away the wetness of his eyes, and thanked whatever higher power may be for the change of topic. “Terrible, I hate socializing. Also it felt like I was being hounded by a teacher with how many questions I was being asked.”

“He needs to ask questions, dear. How else would he know what you like?” They sent him a sympathetic smile that didn’t quite meet their eyes. The mood of the room was still soured by the date hanging ominously on the wall. Taunting them both with it’s ever approaching red circle.

“What I would like is to not have to go to these meetings at all.” Virgil whined. He hopped up to sit cross legged on the countertop beside his maddy. “Why’d you and dammy even talk to him anyways? I thought pops was just going through one of his romance craze phases again, but…”

“But, we all agreed it’s what’s best for you. It’s not healthy to only ever hang out with your family. You need to spread your wings, sweet little baby boy.”

“Ew, baby talk.” Virgil mimed throwing up before crossing his arms and pouting. “Why’s it gotta be some stupid dramatically set up romcom though? Can’t I just go to an online group chat for depressed-emos-anonymous or something?”

Talyn did a laugh somewhere between a giggle and a chortle at that. They playfully swiped at his shoulder. “No, you idiot. Just listen to your parents, okay? It’s time. Way past time, actually…”

“Time to what? Get some?”

“Find someone to love. Someone to...give your feelings too.”

“I give mushy lovey dovey stuff to y’all all the time!”

“Not like that, V. To…” They tapped a frustrated rhythm onto the countertop with their long, pointed nails. “To obsess over. To be attracted to and fawn over. Stuff like that.”

“To bone.”

“Virgil!”

“What? That’s the only difference, ain’t it?” He sighed as he leaned over to place his head on their shoulder. “Why can’t platonic love be enough? I've been doing just fine with just that…”

“Honey…” They let out a sigh of their own before running a reassuring hand through his hair. “That may have been enough until now, but trust me you need this.” The soothing touch of their petting almost calmed  him, until- “We need this.” They ended in a strained whisper, yet unfortunately still loud enough for him to hear.

Virgil jolted away from Talyn and off the counter as if he’d been burned. “What? You’re...You’re all trying to pawn me off or something? Finally tired of me being a fucking mooch?”

“No, no- Little one, that’s not what I-”

“Well if I’m such a leech, maybe I will go hang out in the graveyard with the rest of the rotten worms.”

The tears that had pricked at his eyes earlier decided to return, yet once more he held back the flow of the damn. His eyes reddened with the strain of the repression. Still, he refused to cry around others. Weakness was an ugly shade of color to wear. He wanted to toss out all of his flaws from the closet of his inner self and go shopping for better traits. But maybe, he couldn’t help but think...he was the one that needed to be tossed out right along with them.

Got bubble wrap around my heart.

Waiting for my life to start.

But everyday it never comes.

Permanently at square one.

“Tell the others I’ll be at the church.” He snapped instead as he rounded the corner and stomped up the stairs. He no longer cared if he woke anyone else up. His body was brimming with aggravated energy and his mind was swirling with all the possible negative implications of those few simple whispered words.

The day had barely begun and he already had a massive headache.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After having haphazardly thrown on the nearest clean clothes he could find and all but running out of his house and into the nearly empty street, save for a lone old maid that was bird watching on a nearby bench, he began to make his way over to the cemetery.

On his way there he stopped by Fauna's Florals to pick up a small bouquet of soft and pale yellow roses, the flower of friendship, because that's what he had been to him- the truest friend he would probably ever have. Besides his family, of course, though they were kind of obligated to hang out with him. And he was beginning to wonder if even that reliable, familial obligation had started outstaying it’s welcome.

Miss Fauna, having noticed his red rimmed eyes, had given him a sympathetic smile and a pat on his hand as she handed over the bouquet. He shied away from the unwanted contact and thanked her in a small voice. It was the loudest one he could muster at the time.

When it's late at night-ight,

I'm so dissatisfied-ied.

The weight of an empty life-ife,

Will lessen in the moonlight.

In the light,

In the light,-light,-light.

Shooting Star Cemetery was luckily located in the next street over, making it an easy and short walk. Yet not nearly a long enough a walk to clear his head any from the raging storm it currently housed inside. The graves were all well kept and neatly aligned. The landscaping was done with care and sheer professionalism. The overall atmosphere was more bright and welcoming than one would expect a place housing the dead could ever be.

Virgil moved past the groundskeeper with quick steps, not wanting to have to engage in any conversation with the man whose smile always seemed to stretch too far over his face and whose eyes appeared to linger on his form for too long. Especially not today of all days. He thought as the conversation from earlier resurfaced in his mind. Fresh and unwanted.

His feet took him to his destination almost on autopilot. He had been visiting this particular grave at least once a year for almost seventeen years now. Of course it would be practically hardwired into his system at this point.

“Hey, buddy.” He called out wearily as he approached. Virge leaned over to place the bouquet of yellow roses directly in front of the ivory gravestone before stepping back to sit on the grass across from it.

The stone was the lightest of the ones in its row, almost basking it in an ethereal spotlight. The carvings of angels, ribbons, and roses around it’s surface only accentuated the holy glow. In the dead center, carved in looping and elegant cursive writing, was the epitaph.

It read,

“Patton Sangster:

A young Cherub bright and fair,

Taken from this world too soon.

Now he is way up there,

Dancing between the Sun and the Moon.”

Definitely more fancy and vague than most of the epitaphs around here. Virgil mused, Then again Mrs. Songster was always the poetic dreamer type.

While on the other hand, if he had a gravestone, it would probably say something like "Here lies Virgil Spurling: What an idiot" or "Virgil Spurling: Died of Depression and General Dumbassery".

He let out a long sigh and curled his legs underneath him while crossing his arms. “You wouldn’t believe the week I’ve had, Pat.” He began, “I think my parents have lost their ever loving marbles. Don’t get me wrong or anything- I love them a bunch. But I just don’t...I just don’t get why they’re doing this, ya’ know?”

“They’re insisting I see this stupid matchmaking witch doctor guy, who probably thinks I’m a loser by the way-he seemed kinda stuck up and I kept making a fool of myself as per usual. And like they want me to get hitched to some dude ASAP I guess so I can ‘spread my wings’? Whatever the fuck that’s supposed to mean?”

He started waving his arms around to accentuate his ranting, ”But a part of me can’t help but think they’re just trying to get rid of me. Just pawn me off to a random guy so I can be out of their hair! But they...They’ve never said or done anything like that before...They’ve always been so nice to me and so supportive and so loving so I just don’t…”

Now, in the sanctum of this empty cemetery and the equally emptily promised presence of his only friend, he finally let the tears fall quietly and slowly down his ever reddening cheeks. “I just don’t get it anymore, Patton. Nothing makes sense. It hasn’t for a long time now. Ever since...ever since high school, really. And I just…”

“I just wish you were still here.” He hissed into the morning air as he closed his eyes and let his eyes finish emptying themselves so he could hopefully return home with them dry and pretend that they had never been crying in the first place.

From several yards away the groundskeeper stole glances at the strange visitor as he worked his usual surveyal of the grounds. However, his gleaming, unwelcome eyes were not the only pair that happened to be following Virgil that day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Patton Sangster, newly appointed cupid under Eros, had just finished the last of his angelic training and was lined up with the rest of the lucky graduates about to receive their first heavenly assignments.

Finally! He cheered in his head. A chance to prove that all of his training wasn't for nothing. He may be light hearted, but he certainly wouldn't take his heavenly duties lightly. He would prove without a doubt that being soft hearted didn’t mean he was weak. Far from it in fact. He considered the overflowing love he had in his heart to be his greatest and most cherished source of strength.

Little did the little cupid know just yet, but that unbridled and passionate love of others would soon be his very downfall.

I'm living dead, dead, dead, dead.

Only alive-live-live-live.

When I pretend-tend-tend-tend.

That I have died, died, died, died, died, died.

An elder, more experienced cupid passed back and forth in front of the recruits with a golden clipboard they had summoned. Odiel, patron cupid of dark love ballads, was surprisingly the one giving the assignments to the newbies this year. He listed off each angel and their assignment with a resigned sigh and dramatic flip of the page. He went through many graduates before finally getting to Patton, which had caused the poor angel to bounce nervously on his feet.

"Patton Sangster?"

"Yes, that's me!" He nodded eagerly with a dazzling grin.

"Hm." His superior clicked his tongue before looking at his clipboard. "No official angel name given yet. No patron title earned yet."

Patton's eager expression flickered, a brief frown gracing his features before they turned back into his patton-ted steadfast smile.

"We'll just assign you to your old hometown during life, then. And see where it goes from there."

Patton gasped, bringing his hands up to cup his face. "Heartwish City?!"

Odiel pauses for a moment to check another page on their clipboard. "...Yes."

"Yay! Oh, I can't wait to see everyone again! And help them out!"

"Mhmm. Well, you will have to wait a bit more. There's still orientation to get through."

"Oh, of course." His smile turns more nervous, "Yes, sir."

And with that, the rest of the graduates were assigned before they all headed over to the orientation stadium.

The clouds are thicker and fluffier around the stadium, which is covered in red, pink, and white decorations and gold trimmings. Eros himself stands on a stage floating gently above them. Some of his more well known cupids fly  beside him and his effervescent presence. They give the awaiting crowd reminders of what-to-do's and what-not-to-do's before Eros finally speaks.

"Today is the day you truly become cupids. Go forth and spread love, devotion and admiration wherever you may fly to. Prove your loyalty both to me and to my almighty mother Aphrodite. Be the best angel you can be." He intones in a booming voice accompanied by grand hand gestures. He then bows his head toward the crowd of new cupids in respect and waves them off, officially dismissing them to their new posts.

Patton, having been absolutely jittery with excitement throughout the whole orientation, immediately flaps his small, pink and blue hummingbird like wings and takes off into the early morning sky.

His flight time is shortened by both his familiarity with the destination and his newly appointed status. So much so that to any outside spectator, he would have arrived there in the bat of an eyelash.

As he glided over his old town, he spotted several people he once new. Miss Fauna was putting up a new display in front of her flower shop. Tia and Ana were putting up an ad for their speciality tea of the day. Dr Picani was leaving the Blue Fairy Therapy building while glancing at his watch. And many, many more lovely and well missed faces.

But the one he had missed most of all was currently over at the Shooting Star Cemetery, sitting criss-crossed applesauce right in front of his grave.

Sure, he hadn't seen them in over seventeen years, not since their childhood together. But he would be able to recognize that pale face and protective spirit anywhere! This was his best friend we were talking about, after all. And Patton never took his friendships lightly. So he did a spiraling turn in the air to change directions for this newfound destination. He could worry about his other duties later, he had a dear friend to visit!

He hovered over the cemetery like an excited bee hovering over a group of flowers, staying close to the sparse clouds strewn about the glorious sunrise. Not only had Virgil grown up healthily, but he had even remembered him! And was currently paying respects to his grave, apparently. He leaned forward and focused his hearing on the sounds happening down below him.

"You wouldn't believe the week I've had, Pat." Oh dear, what could have happened? Is whatever it was the reason he was visiting? "I think my parents have lost their ever loving marbles. Don’t get me wrong or anything- I love them a bunch. But I just don’t...I just don’t get why they’re doing this, ya’ know?”

What could they have possibly done? Patton remembered Virgil's parents, three queer platonic partners who had always adored their son. They were loved by the whole neighborhood and Patton himself had also enjoyed their company whenever he had visited Virgil's house for playdates and sleepovers. He couldn't imagine them ever doing anything to harm their beloved child! But, if they had hurt Virgil somehow…

“They’re insisting I see this stupid matchmaking witch doctor guy," Ohhh! A matchmaker, huh? Virgie really had grown up! It seemed like just yesterday the two of them were talking about the other boys possibly having cooties during recess. "Who probably thinks I’m a loser by the way-he seemed kinda stuck up and I kept making a fool of myself as per usual." Well that didn't seem very nice of whoever this matchmaker fellow was. Patton would never think of his assignments as losers...everyone was equally deserving of love after all!

"And like they want me to get hitched to some dude ASAP I guess so I can ‘spread my wings’? Whatever the fuck that’s supposed to mean?” Wait just a minute...Matchmaker...Wings...Patton was a cupid now! Duh. The solution was obvious!

Patton puffed up his chest and fluttered his wings excitedly. He could be Virgil's new, better matchmaker. And nothing would make Pat more happy than having his childhood friend being his first assignment as an official cupid. It was all falling into place so well, almost like destiny! But Virgil was talking again now, so Patton tuned back in.

”But a part of me can’t help but think they’re just trying to get rid of me. Just pawn me off to a random guy so I can be out of their hair! But they...They’ve never said or done anything like that before...They’ve always been so nice to me and so supportive and so loving so I just don’t…”

Ahhh, this was all Virgie's anxiety getting to him again. He had always been a worrywart, even back when they were kids. He guessed some things never changed, not even when it had been so many years. Back then, Patton had always tried to ease his worries and be the most supportive friend he could be. But even at his best and most empathetic, he had been far too young to quite comprehend the full depths of Virgil's emotions.

He looked back at Virgil only to find tears running down his cheeks now, marring his dark eyeshadow. Oh dear sweet Aphrodite- he was crying! “I just don’t get it anymore, Patton. Nothing makes sense. It hasn’t for a long time now. Ever since...ever since high school, really. And I just…”

Highschool? What had happened in high school? Did someone hurt his dearest friend while he wasn't there to protect him? Patton leaned even more forward and gripped the clouds nervously.

“I just wish you were still here.”

Patton froze. Only holy magic and his grip on the clouds keeping him in the air.

I lay back in a glittering mist,

And I, I think of all the men I, I could have kissed.

I haven't lived my life, I haven't lived love,

It's just a bird's eye view from, from up above.

A part of him wished he was still there too. And that same part of him wished he had been there beside Virgil through it all. Had been there in highschool to prevent whatever it was that had hurt his Virgie. Had been there to tell that rude matchmaker off for him. Had been there to give him a lesson in proper etiquette and respect towards his clients. Had been there to help his parents find a better matchmaker. And even to help Virgil pick only the best partner for a great guy like him.

He released a breath he didn't even know he was holding in the first place. But he was here now! And he could help him now!

Now filled to the brim with determination- He hurriedly fumbled to summon his bow and quiver, which he had been storing in his Grace, and pulled out a red romantic arrow from the bag. In his haste, however, he had nicked the side of his arm with the tip of it. He paused to look at the offending wound, wondering if a nick was considered the same thing as a pierce. It wasn't, right? He didn't remember them saying anything about scratches while in the heavenly academy. Oh well, it was probably nothing to worry about! It hadn't come anywhere near his heart, after all.

Besides, Patton had much more pressing matters to attend to. And a heart that needed a connection only he could create was waiting for him. A connection that would transcend the very heavens themselves! Pat would definitely find Virgil a beloved partner that could kiss his many worries away. Many, many kisses. Kisses for that kissable mouth...and soothing voice...and soft looking cheeks…and pale, elegant hands...

Patton shook his head furiously to rid himself of those lucrative thoughts. Sure, Virgil had grown up handsomely, yeah. But this was Patton's best friend he was talking about! How could he be thinking such scandalous and traitorous things? Besides, he had chosen Virgil for his very first assignment. He had to be more professional than that! He had to prove himself a worthy cupid both to Eros himself and to his fellow angels.

He moved to expertly draw his bow, with the same arrow that had previously drawn his blood, poised in the direction of the huddled figure below him. Just as he was about to finally fire, however…He heard it.

"Patton." Just a whisper. A whimper through tears. Just a mumble amidst other unintelligible cries of sorrow.

And yet it felt like a shout. A cry for help. A plea for him. It rang through Patton's ears with the force of a hurricane and knocked him off of his balance.

The arrow cracked and twisted off it's place on the bow and turned to stab through his heart.

He choked on the blood that had bubbled up into his throat and desperately pawed at the arrow lodged accidentally into his most valuable organ.

The words of one of his superior angels and teacher, Balladeil, flared up into his mind. A cupid was not meant to take a cupid's arrow. A cupid's arrow was not made to be used on a cupid.

"Oh Eros!" He cried "Oh no!"

He grabbed at the arrow and started yanking on it. Trying to pull it out of his chest. But it was being stubborn, latching onto his Grace and using that to keep ahold of him. More blood gushed from the wound only to be consumed by his Grace as it tried to heal him from the intrusion. Tears started pouring from Patton's eyes to match Virgil's.

Then, before he knew it, the arrow had melted into his heart and merged into his Grace. And the connection had been completed.

Patton stared dumbfoundedly at the clean space where it used to be for several solid minutes. The wounds were completely healed now and the blood was all gone. It was too late. He had been too late. He had failed.

He took a shaky breath and moved to collect his bow and quiver.

He stored them carefully back into his Grace.

He looked back down at Virgil, who was getting up from the ground now.

He flew slowly over the graveyard as Virgil walked hurriedly past the leering groundskeeper.

He followed Virgil silently all the way back to his home, often passing by a strange crow that happened to be on the same flight path as him.

He watched over Virgil for the rest of the day and way on into that night.

Did I really deserve it?

It happens when you're hurting.

And cut me at the surface,

Of my heart.

Of my heart-heart-heart.

A/N: Patton, you darling idiot. You would have been fine if you weren’t so clumsy. X3 Anyways, hope y’all enjoyed! The next fic I’ll post will be that Creativitwins one shot I mentioned earlier. And then it’ll be right back into the E.V.O.L au! ;3

Tag List:

@accidental-sanders 

@ren-allen

@noneed4thistbh

@virgil-the-void-kitten

@totalwhovian

@bandgeek82002-love

@allycat31415

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@friendly-neighborhood-murderer

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@andreaissy

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@kai-the-person

I finally made an AO3 account!

My user on there is KittenInTheStars.

Any new E.V.O.L AU chapters will be uploaded on there instead of on here. But I will post a link to each update on here! <3

I've also started writing a sweet Dukexiety human sides highschool AU! So please check that out as well. ^u^