Scum Villain's Self Saving System - Tumblr Posts

Idea: Shen Jiu wanders by the camp of children waiting for the entrance exam one night and comes across a small child beating Shang Qinghua with a stick shouting about his terrible writing and stupid ideas

It's very amusing even as Shang Qinghua is clearly not hurt he still looks cowed. And Shen Jiu is thoughtful, leaving his Shidi to get beaten by a small child

The next day the kids barely break soil before Shen Jiu is like: "That one" pointing at Shen Yuan

Everyone is surprised and pleased with his decision he leaves and in a frantic bit of panic Shang Qinghua nabs Luo Binghe

Which leads to Shen Yuan repeatedly stealing Luo Binghe and when questioned he says "he belongs on Qing Jing, not with that man"

Shen Qingqiu is delighted by the spite and joins Shen Yuan in trying to get Luo Binghe to switch to Qing Jing but Luo Binghe actually quite likes An Ding and Shang Qinghua who ruffles his hair and personally taught him to read.

(Shang Qinghua just wants to not die)

Anyway Shen Qingqiu secretly delights in Shen's sassy and snarky ways but he's also bad with children so he's like "fascinating." *pokes Shen Yuan with a long stick*

Ming Fan tries to bully Shen Yuan and gets called a "forgettable cannon fodder" and "ant boy" and immediately deflates and cries

Remember Shen Yuan was a bored rich kid internet weirdo. He's not dealing with bullshit if he can get away with it

The thing you have to understand about shen yuan as a person is that he's not an idiot but he's also too kind for his own good. He's the type of person who will see a violent monster imprisoned because it killed hundreds of people and think, "aww it's locked up how sad :("

He's the type of person who will free the monster, but think "I'm not stupid enough to try to pet it and end up dying myself, though!" not realizing the monster has sworn its life to protecting him for his kindness.

He's the kind of person who always changes others lives for the better and never expects anything in return. He's the kind of person who will expect his kindness to come back to bite him in the ass, but choose to be a loving person anyway

Shen Qingqiu, who had the most terrible,no good,very bad day possible in the holy mausoleum, described as "nothing but a heap of wounds and blood" by Binghe: start to cry when Binghe yells at him.

Also Shen Qingqiu: How unsightly.

Superstar Luo Binghe au. All the directors beg him to be in their movies because his fame will immediately assure success for anything they make. He’s handsome, charming, dedicated, and most of all, extremely talented. He even does his own stunts!! Women love him, and men who say they hate him will still watch his movies so they can figure out how to be more like him. 

The only weird thing about Binghe as an actor is that he refuses to star in romantic films. He won’t kiss anyone, won’t pretend to date someone on screen, won’t even let another actor take over his role for the scenes he doesn’t want to do. His reason? He’s completely loyal to his husband.

Everyone thinks it’s stupid, obviously. You aren’t “cheating” by pretending to love someone else, it’s literally your job! Luo Binghe still refuses and says even he’s not good enough an actor to make anyone believe he could ever love someone other than Yuan-ge.

His fans hate this mysterious Yuan-ge. Because of his (probably insecure and jealous) spouse, all of Binghe’s fangirls cant see him sweep some y/n character off their feet. It’s even worse because they don’t know anything about this guy. Whenever someone asks to see or learn about Binghe’s husband, the star says he’ll never reveal Yuan-ge to the public, because he’s too beautiful and he doesn’t want everyone falling in love with him. 

People kind of run with the idea that obviously this guy must be a total weirdo who Binghe is embarrassed to be seen with. That has to be the explanation, because no matter how perfect someone is, how can they have such a chokehold on THE LUO BINGHE??

Then, one day, years after Luo Binghe’s initial rise to fame…. He goes on a talkshow. With his husband Shen Yuan. 

Obviously EVERYONE tunes in. No one uses TVs anymore bc of the internet, but just for this show, viewer ratings are the highest theyve ever been. Everyone wants to know what the fuss is all about with this guy to have Luo Binghe so down horrible. 

And Shen Yuan isn’t a weirdo. He’s also not some pretty yesman. He makes jokes that make the audience burst into laughter. He’s opinionated, which is really refreshing when every other celebrity stays neutral on every topic to avoid losing fans. He’s polite, but he’s not a pushover. He’s likeable, but he’s not a try-hard about it. Referencing memes makes him an instant hit with the younger generations, and the calm gentle way he talks makes him a hit with the older ones. All of a sudden everyone is going, okay we see why Luo Binghe is obsessed with him. 

Except… while shen yuan was making jokes and charming everyone, Luo Binghe was at his side, pathetically pawing at his husband for attention. The actor keeps whining every two minutes to be reassured yuan-ge still likes him. Whenever Shen Yuan compliments the host, Binghe looks like he’s about to cry. Whenever Luo Binghe jealously wraps his arms around shen Yuan everyone watching just rolls their eyes. Seeing them together people realize… shen yuan is the one that’s out of Luo Binghe’s league.

In just one hour public opinion goes from ‘no one can be worth binghe acting like that for’ to ‘luo binghe is so annoying, let shen yuan talk!!’ 

The next day someone finds shen yuan’s twitter and it blows up. He has his own fan pages now. There’s no pictures of him online other than the footage from the talkshow, so the fan accounts just post that over and over again. Shen yuan retweets a post about him with the caption “i never realized she was holding a plate of corn in this scene” and everyone loses their mind. Everything he says immediately goes viral bc that’s luo binghe’s attic wife.

People start nagging Binghe to post about Shen Yuan bc theyre so attached after his one and only publicized appearance. Binghe is super possessive, but yuan-ge tells him not to worry, so he relents and posts pictures of him and shen yuan on vacation. They’re together, holding hands… but shen yuan’s face and body are blurred out. It’s HORRIFYING. He looks like an eldritch monster bc luo binghe refuses to let anyone look at his yuan-ge in a swim suit, go away you perverts!! His instragram is now just full of pics of shen yuan where his eyes are blacked out so noone else can see how pretty they are. It’s nightmare fuel

Shen Yuan is unfortunately too unbothered to post pictures of himself. Everyone’s tired of Luo Binghe for “hogging shen yuan all to himself” when Shen Yuan is practically an internet celebrity now. 

People go to watch movies and their theatre conversations sound like this:

“Oh, Luo Binghe’s in this one!”

“Who?”

“You know Shen Yuan’s annoying husband?”

“OH THAT GUY..”

forgot to share my svsss doodles on here!! immediately just wanted to draw LBH first and foremost

If you see this you’re legally obligated to reblog and tag with the book you’re currently reading

- día 7: Free day -

Mini Fic (220 words) language: español | rating:none | cw! Cisswap/genderbend

Actually yes making this its own post too. Luo Binghe is currently in the semifinals of the tournament for the title of the most misunderstood (by audience) character here and losing (UPD: he won after all! whoo! in the finals now!), so I made this bingo card of all the shitty and incorrect takes I've seen ppl have about him. Feel free to rb with your filled out card! (I would do mine but it would be just. full. obviously.)

And again, vote here!

Danmei: come for the beautiful men, stay for the tear-jerking angst and wild political drama

yall when i say that i cannot for the life of me read a svsss fic with ning yingying because everytime "A-Luo" shows up in text i cannot stop giggling no matter what scene no matter what context all i can think of is a potato with lbh's demonic mark and i lose it

blueberry ass nipple

You didn’t have to be so cool!!!

disciple luo binghe, running errands for his shizun one day, somehow manages to be in the exact wrong (right) place at the exact wrong (right) time and catches shang qinghua meeting with mobei jun

in order to keep luo binghe from tattling right away, shang qinghua dissembles in a panic and claims that his clandestine meetings with mobei jun are happening because they're lovers and definitely not because shang qinghua is betraying the sect and handing their secrets over to demons in order to save his own hide. when that almost doesn't work, he also tells luo binghe that he knows he's part demon, and that if luo binghe rats him out then shang qinghua will take him down with him. mutually assured destruction

it works, and even though luo binghe threatens him quite a bit (jeez kid calm down, you might be the almighty protagonist but also you're like sixteen) he agrees to keep shang qinghua's fraternizing a secret. but if ANYTHING BAD should happen to the sect or especially to luo binghe's shizun because of this, luo binghe will take shang qinghua down even if it does ruin his life too

shang qinghua, now sweating even more bullets about the impending immortal alliance conference: cool! cool cool cool sounds great cool yeah

so shang qinghua can add "being blackmailed by the punk ass brat I sort of created" to his list of stress-inducing woes. which gets even worse when luo binghe keeps somehow sensing if mobei jun is around for more than a couple hours and showing up, and picking fights with him?? kind of??

wtf has the protagonist been taking tips from liu qingge or something...?

shang qinghua feels like he's gonna have a heart attack when mobei jun just snorts and tosses luo binghe by the scruff like he's an annoying yappy dog

mobei jun actually knows what's up though. teenage half-demon who has never been around his own kind has become spoiled by the lack of competition on this front, and now his hackles are all up because he wants to claim the whole mountain range as his territory, and his instincts are screaming at him to challenge mobei jun about it so that they can decide who is actually top dog. since mobei jun could easily kill him, especially with his blood sealed, and has been clawing rocks and pissing on trees along the borders of an ding peak since before luo binghe was born, he's clearly got seniority here

and since qinghua doesn't want mobei jun to just kill the little shit (fair enough -- that sealed bloodline does look kind of interesting) that means it's up to mobei jun to teach him how to do things like interact with other demons without making a complete fool of himself. lesson one: what to do when you challenge someone out of your league and they win, assuming they don't just kill you

so luo binghe reluctantly gains another demon tutor

meng mo actually approves. he's been out of the loop on demon high society for a long time, and has lacked a body for long enough too that he's forgotten a lot of the particulars of socializing. it'll be good for luo binghe to pick up some manners that aren't just silly human tea ceremonies and things. maybe he'll start addressing meng mo more respectfully for a change!

(lol no)

luo binghe is partly like "I don't need to learn demon social skills since I'm spending the rest of my life as a disciple of qing jing peak" but partly like, well, if shizun knew about this and didn't freak out about it, he'd probably say that knowledge is power and learning how to handle politics and diplomacy of all kinds is important. and despite himself luo binghe is also interested, because this is a whole perspective on his own nature that he's never really gotten advice about

also, mobei jun is the lover of shang qinghua? mobei jun is a demon who successfully seduced a cang qiong peak lord? does he have any advice about that?

(he does -- all of it very bad)

anyway all of this sort of fucks up the immortal alliance conference developments really good, so the system kind of gives up and settles on some other big transformative achievements that luo binghe has to complete in order to be suitably heroic

but shen qingqiu has no idea and so the reprieve just seems to come out of nowhere until several years later, when he walks in on luo binghe with his claws out and huadian gleaming in the company the demon king of the northern desert, the two of them playing weiqi or something while they wait for shang qinghua to get back from some random logistics crisis he had to rush off to

shen qingqiu: ...?!?

luo binghe, panicking: wait shizun I can explain it's not what it looks like SHIZUN I SWEAR I WAS GOING TO TELL YOU PLEASE DON'T BE MAD--!

shen qingqiu: all this time I thought you were sneaking out to meet a girl, and this was what you were doing instead?!

luo binghe: WHAT?? shizun no I'd never do that I swear I don't even like girls!

shen qingqiu: that's not -- wait what do you mean you don't even like girls?!

mobei jun, unperturbed and still focused on the weiqi board: he's gay

do you think if given the chance tianlang Jun would have been a good parent to luo binghe? In fics with su xiyan he is a great father or atleast a father who tries and has a somewhat healthy relationship with his son. But in canon would it have been possible if say zhushi Lang managed to come across luo binghe or lbh stumbled across the bailu lake or smth and lbh ends up being adopted again. Would he have a good or even healthy dynamic with these two? without a body and su xiyan to raise his son would tianlang Jun even try? or will he just attempt to get rid of lbh? What would lbh relationship with his cousin be? Im actually so curious for people's opinions so spam me <3

tianlang-jun snake man collector question mark

Tianlang-jun: Master Shen, can I offer you something? Water? Tea? My nephew's hand in marriage?

Shen Qingqiu: what?

Tianlang-jun: Perhaps wine? Some snacks? My sons hand in marriage?

Shen Qingqiu: I-

Tianlang-jun: Tanghulu? Congee? My hand in marriage?

love the thought that "balls" might actually be some demonic unit of measurement like SQQ asks Binghe what fucking balls n he's like "idk shizun I never bothered to learn demon lore" and he asks Mobei and Sha Hualin and they both are like "uhm???it's six balls. What's unclear??" SQQ is going fucking insane, then Mobei picks up random object like "mhm this is about six balls heavy." N Sha Hualin takes it then like "I'd say nearly seven"

SQQ spends the entire night trying to figure out how much "a ball" is in normal measurement units.

Writing 人渣反派自救系統 (SVSSS, Scum Villian's Self Saving System). The 渣 and 反 (in red at the end) are written such that they form the character 愛 (ai4; love)

[eng by me]

Peaklord Shen (svsss) as Lord Shen (Kung fu Panda)