Shadow Weaver - Tumblr Posts

4 years ago

Y'all ever think about how Shadow Weaver is...hot, and like lose your shit?


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4 years ago

im feeling a very specific emotion that i have only felt in very specific situations for very specific people and it's extremely violent and graphic and pouring it into words isnt exactly what someone would call healthy


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2 years ago

I finished "Do It" my fic about what happens if Glimmer kills Catra in the s4 finale! I'm really happy about the way the final chapter turned out, especially because Shadow Weaver gets what she deserves, instead of getting to sacrifice herself like she did in the show


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2 years ago

I finished "Do It" my fic about what happens if Glimmer kills Catra in the s4 finale! I'm really happy about the way the final chapter turned out, especially because Shadow Weaver gets what she deserves, instead of getting to sacrifice herself like she did in the show


Tags :
2 years ago

I finished "Do It" my fic about what happens if Glimmer kills Catra in the s4 finale! I'm really happy about the way the final chapter turned out, especially because Shadow Weaver gets what she deserves, instead of getting to sacrifice herself like she did in the show


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1 year ago
Happy Pride Everyone.

Happy pride everyone.


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3 years ago

She-ra Season 2 Re-watch Thoughts

She-ra Season 2 Re-watch Thoughts

Season 2 is much more tonally consistent than season 1. The tone doesn’t shift as much episode to episode as it did in the first season with more of a mix of humor and seriousness within the episodes themselves without comedy dampening the drama. For example the episode “Roll with It” did have a lot of comedy in it, but it didn’t dampen the revelation as to why Adora was being so meticulous. In fact I thought that moment hit harder because of it. They did a very good job of showing Adora’s frustration being in stark contrast to everyone else’s carefree attitudes towards the planning. The most jarring episode in terms of tonal shifts is probably Ties that Bind and that episode is actually pretty great on the whole despite the swift wind humor falling flat for me.

She-ra Season 2 Re-watch Thoughts

You can’t talk about season 2 without mentioning its magnum opus episode light spinner. This episode manages to be a linchpin in the series moving forward tying together the fates of all the main heroines (Adora, Catra, and Glimmer) with shadow weaver in the past, present, and future. This show puts an emphasis on cycles and learning how to break them and this episode masterfully shows those cycles that shadow weaver creates.

She-ra Season 2 Re-watch Thoughts

I do think this season suffered from dreamworks or netflix deciding to split up seasons 2 and 3. This season, while having some great episodes, was mostly build up to season 3. Everything that was set up and established in this season was paid off in season 3: Hordak and Entrapta’s portal experiment and Catra’s desperation for motherly love that was denied her and jealousy over shadow weaver’s preferential treatment of Adora all come to a head in the third season. This made it so that I enjoyed this season a lot more the second time around than the first. The first time around it felt very cut off and I couldn’t help but be disappointed to not get the climax the episodes were clearly building to. I will say the payoff was well worth the wait, but that just makes the decision to cut the season in 2 to be more ill thought out in my opinion because the pacing works much better when you can go right into season 3 without the wait.


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4 years ago

Shadow Weaver’s Death, Her True Abusiveness, And Her Final, Beautiful, Gift To Catra

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::The resistance fighters stand in the failsafe chamber. Catra has just called Shadow Weaver out on her manipulation. Shadow Weaver reluctantly explains the danger of the failsafe, and then implores Adora to take it: even if she fails, Shadow Weaver says, she will save her friends, and the universe. As literally every other person in that room cries out against Adora taking the risk, Adora turns and says she will do it. Catra, dismayed, runs to her telling her that Shadow Weaver is sacrificing her, and demands to know why she's letting her do that. Adora tells Catra "Because even if she is, it's better than Prime getting the Heart and destroying the universe." Catra trembles in deathly fear, her face consumed in terrible realization: if Adora does as SW wishes, she will die. Shadow Weaver is trying to kill Adora. She knows this to her very soul, because... she is Shadow Weaver... And Adora is letting it happen…

Hi there, my name is Joel, and in this segment I'll be looking at Shadow Weaver's death, her being a child abuser, her terrible manipulations of Catra and Adora and the monstrous pains the two girls have to conquer to save themselves from her.

The main premise I'll be trying to explain here is that, like Horde Prime, Shadow Weaver is a villain of utmost seriousness. And, like Horde Prime, the girls will treat her as one, surpassing and defeating her once and for all. But it won't be with violence, but instead with love, creating a beautiful story of two people transcending their trauma and hurt through coming together over their love for one another.

I feel obliged to warn readers: this post will cover child abuse, even predatation (*not sexual, ie). It may be hard to read. Also warning: tl;dr, please consider at least sitting down to read this!

Finally, I know there are Shadow Weaver fans out there; that's good. Shadow Weaver is, at times, cool af. But, definitively a terrible person within the plot of the show.

So, even if you're a fan of Shadow Weaver, I still encourage you to read along because as we reveal her truth and the damage she deals to Catra and Adora, it makes her final moment so, so much more beautiful… and it gives entirely new meaning to her final... two… words….

Disclaimer time: Taking on Shadow Weavers death is ambitious for a first post, I know. But understanding her is crucial to understanding most of the major moments in this show. Still, I should say here that while this may seem a bit ‘head’ canon-y, I assure you my conclusions come from watching the show carefully and referencing the entirety of the rest of the show back to this one moment. I'm instead positing these as theories, and let's just say I feel I have the data, and Data Never Lies! Please *do* ask questions or seek calcifications in the comments or Ask me anything (I'm new to Tumblr).

----Part 1: Catra, Micah, and the Truth----

To start this journey we will travel backwards in the series to investigate the what and why of the terrible child abuse Catra suffered growing up under Shadow Weaver's care. We will be looking chiefly at the Light Spinner episode in the 2nd season. We will cover Catra's confrontation and SW's -supposed- explanation for her abuse, then the tale of Micah and Shadow Weaver's manipulation of him, and then the terrible truth of why Catra -really- was abused.

>A terribly alone Catra asks her abusive mother why she did it. Why did she treat her so badly ?

Shadow Weaver answers: "Because you remind me of myself. You always have. Nothing was ever easy for me either. I wasn't born to power like Adora and... others. I had to earn my power, fight for it. Why should it be any different for you?"

This is a very typical reason for an abuser to feel they are acting out their abuse on others: no one in this world understands my pain, so therefore I will inflict my pain upon a child so that they will know my pain as well. For many people this is essentially the truth of their abusers. I can't see any other reason for MY abusers to do what they did, other than this. It is, however, not the truth about Catra. We will discuss this in detail later.

We then watch as Catra does a very strong and eloquent job of rejecting and condemning it. She shows great emotional pain as she does so, and we know that her trauma is severe from watching her. Catra exclaims, her face full of emotional hurt and pain at Shadow Weaver's betrayal: "I was a child when you took me in. What could I have possibly done to deserve the way you treated me? I am nothing like you. You are old, and bitter, and weak."

Everything she says is perfectly true. As a child, there is no way she could have deserved the abuse Shadow Weaver inflicted on her. There never is. And she's also right when she says she's not anything like Shadow Weaver. Where Shadow Weaver is an unfeeling monster (as we will see), Catra feels deeply. Catra is inherently good, and while she will make terrible mistakes to come, she feels intense remorse. Shadow Weaver simply does not.

So, Shadow Weaver gives Catra a believable reason for the abuse, which, again, is a lie. But... there is meaning which we need to take from her choice of words: Shadow Weaver feels others, like Adora and Micah, are given an unfair advantage over people like herself. We will come back to this important insight soon...

Before we get to the real, harsh truth of why Catra was abused, we need to understand the tale of Micah and ‘Light Spinner’-‘s manipulation of him to get power.

>The story of Micah seems to be full of whimsy and childlike innocence. A young boy is talented beyond his years, a true prodigy. SW trains him, giving him access to teachings beyond what a sorcerer of his age should have. She tells him he's special, a true talent, like her. When she tells him "the guild needs talents like OURS more than ever before" she manipulates him, making him feel apart, better than all the other students and teachers, and that only SW can understand. It's SW's greatest talent: dividing people against each other, and this is part of her lifelong manipulation of Catra and Adora. Note: Castaspella accuses SW of mind controlling Micah (s5e8) to which SW responds "My gifts were always far subtler than that” - SW controls young Micah through mind games.

>SW hints of something of great importance, but then says "you're not ready". Micah demands to know, he's a special boy after all, right? He's so incredibly naive and innocent, doing things like chewing on magic crystals and acting out in class. He is, in fact, exactly the kind of privileged child who SW so greatly hates. This is where we get real meaning out of SW's supposed explanation for abusing Catra: Micah has inborn power that SW feels he is unworthy of possessing...

She preys upon his naiveness, showing him the Horde army. He, of course, demands they be stopped, and he's playing right into her hands. When she tells him the plan and of the upcoming meeting she tells him "I only hope that Norwyn and his followers can see the threat as clearly as YOU do." Again, she is making him feel apart, as though he's better than others. After all, he's a special little prodigy, right ?

SW gives her presentation at the council, trying to prey upon their fear by saying that the Horde have a rune stone. As she speaks of the spell of obtainment, her eyes are full of lust at the idea of so much power. But it is forbidden, and for good reason. As she looks over her shoulder at Norwyn her look is severe, accusing. She has no respect for him. And he's right to say that the problem will be handled: the war, in fact, does become a stalemate and stays that way all the way up until we are first introduced to Catra and Adora. Angrily, greedily, she demands they get power so they can 'have a planet to protect'.

She fails to convince them, but of course Micah sees her leaving the meeting, angry and frustrated, so he comes to her aide. "They never listen to me. After all I've done I still haven't earned their trust". Again, SW is set apart from them. When she says "they just want to hold the rest of us back" she's including Micah, making him feel separate, better, like her. She's indoctrinating him in her plan.

>We get a scene between Catra and SW here, where Catra tries to get SW to give her a reason to save her. All SW wants to know is when she's being sent to Beast Island: she realizes she has to escape that night. She sets out to manipulate Catra into giving her the reagent she needs to escape. SW talks up how weak and powerless she is, preying on Catra's lingering pity, desire for connection. A emotionally desperate Catra unfortunately gives it to her. Catra tells her "you don't get to ask things of me anymore" but she's desperate and depressed, feeling totally alone after so recently seeing Adora and consequently nearly dying the episode before, only to be saved by Scorpia's caring about her.

>And apprehensive Micah asks SW if she's sure this is a good idea. She tells him "WE need this power, it's the only way to protect our people". It's a lie, but Micah thinks he's special because he's SW's apprentice, and so he agrees to do it.

As the spell begins to work, we see a terrifying eldritch horror type of creature summoned. It soon breaks free even as Micah helps SW try to contain it. SW acts surprised to see it, but she always knew this spell. Micah runs, and SW stays, yelling angrily at Micah for leaving. She experiences fear as it consumes her, but she knows it's part of getting her power. This is the price she pays to become powerful. She tells Micah he betrayed her by abandoning her and yet, what other possible outcome was there but for them BOTH to be destroyed or corrupted? Norwyn tries to stand up to her, telling her "bringing you into our ranks was a grave mistake". She counters calling him a fool. "You're all weak. None of you deserve my help".

I often see people say this show doesn't show death, but what happens next is undeniably so: it is murder. She annihilates two sorcerer's in one hit, consumes the head sorcerer to give her more magical power. It is pure evil. As she realizes her new power she exclaims "The spell worked. I am stronger than ALL of you." She menaces Micah.

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This. Was. Always. The. Plan. The spell worked, she says so herself. Micah tries to defend himself weakly against her, he's entirely at her mercy. He expects death, but instead she caresses his cheek, touches his ear. Then she gives him a look of disdain. It's no mistake she covers half her face even at this point in her history, so we can't know her full emotions. But it's clear, she condescends to him: he was a naive little pawn, not meant to survive, or at minimum, he was supposed to become corrupted like her. But it doesn't matter. She got what she wanted. So she leaves him to live knowing what he's done. The tale of ‘Light Spinner’ has ended: her better persona was just an illusion, useful in her goal of obtaining more power. An empowered Shadow Weaver then shows up at the Fright Zone, killing the guard as a demonstration of power. She declares herself for Hordak, and at least a partial truth is apparent: she wanted the vampiric power so she could channel the Black Garnet. Changing sides bothers SW not at all.

I point out SW’s violence because it is the only time they show any graphic death in this show, and it's therefore meant to show that SW is different, and dangerous. There really was no ‘Light Spinner’, as at multiple moments during her time at Mystacor her true emotions show through (such as pic1, top) and they are both vile and malicious, to put it lightly. Furthermore, note that SW going to the Horde doesn't end up ensuring their victory over the princesses, so yes, in fact, SW was lying to Micah all along. Last, keep in mind Micah’s opinion of her later on: SW is never to be trusted.

Now it's time to get back to the real reason Catra was abused and it's important implications for Adora's abuse as well.

>The scene following Catra's confrontation with SW, we see baby Adora having just arrived in the Fright Zone. SW walks past her, not particularly interested... and yet she sees something in her. And so she takes interest. She knows, in some way, that Adora will wield powerful magic, and since it also becomes clear to us that SW knows all about the past history of She-ra and the Heart of Etheria, it's a logical jump to say she probably thinks Adora is She-ra. Either way, Adora is a powerful orphan child with inborn talent beyond any normal expectation.

Sound familiar? The tale of Micah is there to inform this moment: SW meeting baby Adora. She is in a position to wield ultimate control over a magically privileged child. And the implications are not good...

Apologies to readers here, this next part is intense. Just a quick warning. The total implication of this is that SW never loved Adora, just like she didn't care about Micah. It is all manipulation, and it should be noted that at this point SW has switched to a full mask, conveniently hiding all emotion except a sliver of her eyes (as well as hiding her corrupted features). It's now almost entirely impossible to accurately read her emotions. I don't think she wants you to, as she really has no feelings of actual compassion. She only sees Adora as a privileged child she will use and then discard for her own power.

This means she is, in fact, a child predator. In this case, she's a predator of children of privilege, but the effect is the same: she sees such children as easy targets for her to manipulate for her own gain. Worse, the strong emotional feelings which Adora naturally feels towards those around her makes her easier to control, and SW manipulates this vulnerability against her, as a child and then again as they are headed for the failsafe.

So, returning to the real truth of why SW abused Catra. Let's take a look back at Catra’s condemnation of SW's explanation for her abuse, and it's just one line we need to understand: "I was a child, what could I have possibly done to deserve the way you treated me?" As it turns out, Catra -did- do something, and you have to adore and appreciate this show because we don't get this answer until the very end. Before season 5 was available, it would simply be impossible to understand Catra's story fully. The creators want you to come full circle of so many understandings, the story is that deep.

It's that one, beautiful, follow on line when Catra confesses her love to Adora- She says "I always have"...

Adora was Shadow Weaver's tool, her next prey. So, along comes Catra, who experiences romantic love for Adora right from the start. Beautiful, total love and devotion. SW sees this, and she decides that she can't let Catra be a hindrance to her plans. And yet she knows she can't kill Catra outright or risk losing Adora's affection. So she hurts Catra, tries to make her weak, to diminish her. She is trying to crush Catra's spirit, her will to live, all while making sure to instill a sense of duty and ambition in Adora which makes her less available to Catra. The abuse works, but not on Catra. Catra stays loyal to Adora, and is so secretly strong within herself in such a way that SW fails to destroy her spirit, although Catra has such incredible trauma from it that we see her struggle with it throughout the rest of the series.

But the abuse does work on Adora and so she grows apart from Catra in such a way that Catra eventually comes to feel Adora doesn't love her. And when Adora so clearly breaks the final half of the promise she made to Catra, Catra too, grows apart from Adora.

Catra therefore represents a person in this story who would have been so entirely below SW's notice that had she not loved Adora the way she did, SW would never have taken the time to hurt her. It wouldn't have been worth her time, and Catra would have had a happy(ish) childhood if not for loving Adora. By the way, this truth of SW's abuse of Catra is indeed confirmed in the show, but we don't have time to cover it here and it deserves its own theory post, anyways.

Before we get back to s5 let's take a brief moment to address SW's abuse of Adora: Adora is the kind of person who can't help but empathetically feel the pain of others when they feel it, and it's what makes her to be so unable to balance her own needs against those of others who are hurting. And so SW making Adora have ambition, to want to win at the expense of others, is actually a frightening manipulation. SW teaches Adora to believe she has to do this in order to be the leader, and then as the leader she must protect everyone else from harm. Adora goes on to show great emotional confusion over this, as she doesn't really feel she’s qualified to be that leader. It makes her feel alone from everyone else, and makes Adora worry about every decision she makes. SW essentially saddles Adora with a lonely burden of leadership, one which she's not well suited for. Adora has a very ADHDish (I’m no expert on ADHD) response to this where she bounces around trying to satisfy everyone else’s feelings, such as within their unit, and so her relationship with Catra suffered because of this.

To sum up, the abuses SW inflicts on the two of them results in their division from each other, and it's a division which tries to tear down both girls spiritually throughout this series. They each have specific traumas relating to Shadow Weaver's abuse of them. These are different, damaging fears SW instilled in each of them to make them easier to control. Because of this, both girls contribute to their separation to the two different sides of the war, and it's only through the great emotional learning of each of them that they are able to start putting it back again in season 5. And so, we will see that when SW returns in season 5, she immediately tries to pick up where she left off… to drive them apart from each other and manipulate them, once again, for her own gain.

Side note #2 before we get back to season 5: SW has a complete and total lack of love for Catra as well. Her callous manipulation of Catra, followed by leaving the fright zone like she did, was a spiritual blow and then a death sentence for Catra. SW would know this and yet she simply did not care. Furthermore, when they meet in Moment of Truth (s3ep4), SW again tries to kill Catra, only stopping short because Glimmer can't withstand the magical drain SW is taking from her. She's just not good people... And if she has such a total lack of love or compassion for Catra, it's a logical jump that she has just as little love and feeling for Adora.

Anyways... let's work on that season 5, phew, I know this is long. We're not done yet, though...

----Part 2: The present up till SW’s Death----

Alright, so returning back to season 5 where we began...

Catra is certain that SW is killing Adora. And the reason Catra is so certain of this is because she understands this fundamental truth behind the childhood abuse of of her and Adora. She knows that SW intended to use Adora, and was grooming her in order to use her to gain more power. And, she knows the true nature of SW’s abuse of Catra herself, that it was meant to destroy her so she wouldn't get in the way of SW using Adora.

How exactly Catra knows this I won't cover here, it would take too long and it deserves its own theory post. But, it is pretty well confirmed in the show as well. No distractions! Moving on...

So… when Adora tells Catra she will take the failsafe even though SW is killing her, it's Catra’s knowledge that SW is for certain doing this to Adora which leads Catra to shake in fear, and then refuse Adora once she returns with the failsafe. This moment goes much deeper than just Catra knowing she can't live without Adora, although that is also true.

Ok so here it is, the big theme we will now delve into, that explains so much:

The all important, crucial thing that Catra isn't seeing is that in order for SW to sacrifice Adora, it is entirely dependent on abusive manipulations is SW doing to both of them, starting from the moment they first see SW in season 5, which are intended to make sure Adora doesn't survive deploying the failsafe.

I know it's a tough implication to accept, but I promise to explain. So why? Why would SW not want Adora to survive? This, atleast, should be obvious: She-ra could stop SW once she has the power, so She-ra is an enemy that SW needs to eliminate to achieve ultimate power. So, SW's goal is to get Adora to bring the failsafe to the heart, but then be too weak to survive the process... leaving SW the uncontested champion by her magical vampiric powers. And so... SW manipulates the two girls, doing her most familiar trick: driving them apart, making them feel isolated from each other.

Her manipulations begin from the very moment Catra and Adora see her in season 5, and they continue up until Adora accepts the failsafe and a bit beyond.

So let's lay this out from the beginning, shall we? Episode 10: When SW walks into the room, saying she knows where the failsafe is, Catra is at first surprised at her appearance, she's thrown off guard. Catra very much wanted to stop SW once and for all, but never got the chance. And now, the new, more feeling Catra is faced with her oldest enemy: she can't hide her hatred and anger at her. It pretty much takes everything she's got not to violently attack her right there and then. But this new Catra isn't going to sink to that low. And yet... SW will intentionally aggravate and attack Catra to reactivate her trauma.

What I find very interesting about that scene, though, is that both Glimmer and Adora immediately look to Catra, knowing she will be upset, both trying to help her. And yet, it's Glimmer who looks first.

Even though Glimmer never says it out loud, Glimmer knows SW played and manipulated Glimmer herself, and that her manipulations were ultimately the reason that Glimmer made the mistake of activating the Heart, which brought Horde Prime's fleet down upon Etheria. Glimmer also watched SW torture and almost kill Catra in s3ep4, so I think Glimmer knows very well how dangerous SW is and how badly she's hurt Catra in the past. Instead, we can take the story of Glimmer and SW as another stand out example of how, once again, we saw SW manipulate someone, Glimmer in this case, with no concern for her well being.

>Adora is also thrown off by SW's reappearance, she doesn't enjoy seeing her either. But then, she also sympathetically looks to Catra, knowing this is a hurtful moment for her. All of this is to say that Catra actually has strong allies against SW, unlike in the past. And it's very important that Adora is such a staunch ally to Catra against SW, in fact it's everything. But, Adora doesn't quite do a good enough job in showing Catra how strongly aligned she, too, is against SW. Unintentional though it may be, as we will see.

>Episode 11: Continuing on, Glimmer immediately opposes SW's desire to use the heart's power. Castaspella tries to say SW is the lesser of evils, but of course, Castaspella is just a pawn. Catra jumps on Casta's words, calling SW evil... SW taunts her back mockingly and we see Catra's anger start to get out of control. But, Adora knows, one way or another, that SW is the root of all of Catra's pain, and so she comforts her, showing her that she sees her pain, and that she's got her back.

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Again, it's very important that Adora is Catra's greatest ally against SW, as she has learned to treat SW as a de facto enemy because she has seen the pain and torment Catra experienced because of SW’s abuse; in addition to her own knowledge of how SW manipulated herself as a child.

>Adora confronts SW, asking why she even needs their help getting the failsafe. SW answer is a lie, but plays to her manipulation of Casta, who she needs: she says she can't get past Micah. (Note: who she actually needs is Adora.) As SW tells her plan she leans into Adora's emotional fears of letting others get hurt and reminds Adora she has to be the hero, SW even touches Adora, which we see Catra react angrily to. But, SW successfully manipulates Adora into accepting her plan, and Catra can't stand to watch it as she knows it must somehow be a dangerous manipulation. Catra quietly leaves to try to process her anger. We then see Adora slap SW's hand away, showing defiance, but as Catra has left, she probably doesn't see that. Adora looks around and sees that Catra is gone, which SW responds to by trying to manipulate her into leaving Catra behind, as she knows Adora is more vulnerable without Catra around. But Adora is wary of SW's manipulations, and goes after Catra. SW is aggravated by this.

>The two girls have a very good, emotional talk about SW. Catra is dismayed, but Adora is always brave for others, so she tells her she's got to try. Adora acknowledges Catra's pain, their pain, from SW's abuse. Ultimately Adora convinces Catra to come. Together, Adora says SW can't hurt them anymore. Catra reminds Adora how dangerous SW is, but the girls have reaffirmed their bond, their promises to each other. Which is important later, as this will come up again.

>As they infiltrate Mystacore, Catra is apprehensive and stays at the back. But as the mission progresses she drifts towards the front, trying to be the lookout so she can protect Adora. This, unfortunately, puts her in physical proximity to SW when they check the ritual chamber. Catra checks the chamber, but then a sorcerer appears out of nowhere (literally, how??) and SW grabs her in a way that's very reminiscent of s1ep2, traumatizing her.

I can't help but conclude SW is being intentionally hurtful in order to unnerve Catra. She could have just pointed, or put her hand to Catra's mouth, after all. Catra throws herself away from SW, demanding she not touch her, and makes the mistake of dropping the spell and revealing their presence. Look closely at this scene and you see Adora actually shows great anger, even violent intent towards SW for doing this to Catra, but it's so quick Catra probably doesn't see it, as she's staring down SW instead.

Under a track, Adora tries to become She-ra, but she's too emotionally conflicted since the episode before when they returned to the Fright Zone and Adora started to realize she's been letting Catra down, leaving her hanging. And SW's hurting of Catra also blocks Adora, she's trying to help Catra and yet she's accepting SW's guidance again, which she knows Catra hates and doesn't trust.

>As they pass through the door and continue down a corridor, Adora sees Catra is in emotional pain and holding herself, so she lends her emotional support. She knows SW touching her was incredibly abusive. She tells Catra that it'll be ok, and to trust her, hitting her with her dearest look of love and care for her. She knows SW is Catra's enemy, and she's got her back. Catra looks back, trying to trust her, to put her fear aside. But the moment is cut short when SW interrupts them, guilting Catra for revealing their presence. Adora walks on, saying they have to keep moving, and her face says she's doing it to stop SW from talking to Catra, but again, Catra doesn't see Adora's face. Catra feels left behind, that the moment was cut short. It's by the barest off margins Catra is missing how strongly Adora is coming down against SW for her sake.

> We get more information about SW's corruption next, that it's a way to bypass the crystal of Arxia and get at Heart of Etheria's energy, and we know this because it's discussed immediately after Castaspella tells them about the crystal of Arxia. So, if the magic is released, SW will have practically unlimited power. SW just mocks Casta when she tries to guilt SW over using the spell, she gives no apology. We see both Catra and Glimmer seemingly have a deeper realization about SW and her powers and that both of them look disturbed by it.

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>Continuing on, we get the scene where Catra saves Adora from fire, which is so cute but I'll skip the romantic implications: as Catra walks through the fire, Adora stops and frets over not knowing what to do about Catra, how to give her what she wants. Adora is worried she's going to fail, that she could die. It's Adora's biggest, lifelong fear as the bearer of She-ra, and she struggles with it continuously throughout the series. To her, it therefore doesn't make sense to her to get Catra's hopes up too soon.

>Adora's thoughts naturally turn to her inability to transform... and SW pounces on the opportunity in order to exploit it.

Consider now, if Adora's problem is becoming She-ra, why does SW immediately give her a hard time about Catra, instead? Adora rejects SW's criticism, but SW flips the conversation telling Adora she can't be a weak She-ra and seemingly blaming it all on Catra. She tells Adora that her weakness means she's letting everyone else down. SW tells her she has to focus, and Catra makes her weak. This is terribly the opposite of the truth and SW knows this. What she’s really doing is a deep manipulation of Adora that leans on her early abuse of her: Adora has to be perfect for everyone else, and as she's the only one who can do it, she's totally alone in this burden. The truth is that Adora has always needed other people, that's where she draws strength from. Catra loves Adora simply for who she is: she represents the strongest, smartest and most dedicated person, ie, she's the most powerful person to help Adora with her emotional need for support.

Which SW knows, so she does her best to try to separate them, to make Adora think she's alone. SW does this by grouping Catra with everyone else: save everyone, or no one. Then she delivers a direct assault of Adora spiritually by saying "the world needs She-ra right now, not Adora". She's telling Adora that she doesn't matter, only She-ra matters, and she needs to be willing to give it all up to be that hero. We see Adora search SW's face, she's not satisfied and then she does her best to reject her, pulling her hand away in anger while saying she will stop Prime “no matter what.” Catra is eavesdropping on this, but can't see that Adora stands up to SW so strongly... as usual. Catra knows SW is up to no good with it, though. Doubt takes root in Adora, and it aggravates her fears that she's not good enough to be She-ra.

>Arriving at the failsafe chamber, SW gives away just how much she already knows about the Heart. SW explains the failsafe, and so we know she always planned on getting Adora to accept the failsafe, risking it all. Adora approaches, trying to be brave for everyone else.

One of Catra's most important moments follows: she stops Adora from accepting the failsafe, and calls SW out for her bullshit. She's not going to let Adora walk into a trap when she knows better. Catra flips it on SW, telling her to take the failsafe, making SW tell them why it's dangerous, why SW won't do it herself. She points out how SW knows too much, yet didn't pursue the power of the failsafe. Catra is totally certain that SW wants to hurt Adora, and so she's calling her out to get SW to reveal her manipulation of Adora.

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SW instead tries to guilt Adora, saying she alone understands that this is the only way to stop Prime. But Catra stands firm, she protects Adora from SW's manipulation as best she can.

Confronted and trapped by Catra's having seen through her plan, we see literally every person in the room ally themselves against SW. SW is forced to admit the truth: using the failsafe will mean death even for She-ra, if she isn't strong enough.

And so Adora realizes what's coming, that She-ra is the only one who can do it. She's terrified and sad at the thought that this could, will, be her end; that she really will have to give it all up for everyone else. She's always thought she'd have to. It's a deep held belief that she's alone in her burden as She-ra.

Adora asks the obvious question: What happens if I die? SW's next words prey upon Adora's every weakness, her lack of belief in her self worth, and innate need to protect others: "Then the magic will be restored to Etheria, through your sacrifice. You will give us the power to bring us to victory. Prime will be defeated. Your friends will be free." SW is listing out every last thing that will happen if Adora doesn't do it, and each is a part of her greatest fears. Adora is unable to resolve between her distrust of SW and need to protect and be brave for everyone else's sake. SW has her trapped by her own emotions.

Catra looks on, watching the manipulation, seeing the consequences of Adora attempting this. Everything about this moment speaks to manipulations SW has used on Adora before: she preys on emotional need and weakness, she isolates Adora in her burden, she even does the dreaded ear touch. If Adora does what SW says, Catra knows it'll be the death of her.

As SW completes her manipulation, everyone in the room cries out against the unfair decision Adora must make. And yet, Adora doesn't see a choice. Catra puts it best, saying: "you don't care about Adora, Adora can't even care about herself!"

But Bow's words also have meaning: "Theres no way we're risking Adora like that." For all that Bow and Glimmer have done for Adora, she's still supposed to be the champion that's going to save them. They need things from her, not simply Adora as herself. All in all, Bow and Glimmer did their absolute and kindest best to help Adora, often emotionally supporting her through her depressions and fears of not being a good She-ra. But in the end, they still needed her to be She-ra.

But Catra is different, all she wants is Adora, and for her to be safe and loved, and ideally, to be with her. Catra's opinion in this moment is the true one, the most honest. But Adora can't overcome the thought of failing everyone, and so she pushes forward, saying she will take the failsafe.

Adora is feeling alone, trapped by fate. Catra runs to her, literally shaking her in order to try to convey how sure she is that Adora is going to die if she does this. But Adora can't let the universe die, and she's She-ra. She (Adora) doesn't matter. It's only what she can do to try to fix things for others that matters, her hero's burden. Adora pushes Catra's hands off her, in a lifetime of pain and sorrow Catra has never looked so sad. Adora really is pushing her away, not seeing how seriously Catra feels, how badly she needs Adora to understand her in this moment. A dissociated Adora looks internally, accepting her fate, alone again, isolated.

Maybe Catra could have found a way to get through to Adora, but they run out of time. A chipped Micah shows up and begins to systematically defeat them, and Adora has no more time to choose. SW is easily taken down by Micah, it shows his anger at her. He taunts her, she's got nowhere to hide. This is interesting, but not our focus..

Adora again tries to summon She-ra and fails. She simply can't resolve between her sense of failure to Catra and her need to be brave for everyone else. She looks to Catra, decides to do the brave thing as herself, not as She-ra, even if it means she will fail, and hurt Catra. After all, since she’s She-ra, she has to try, right? This is her burden.

As SW turns to Adora and says "the failsafe... we... we can't" Adora is pressed by urgency, doing what she can. Catra tries one last desperate plea: "Please. It doesn't always have to be you!" Adora can't accept this, internally she is certain she has to save everyone. Even if this includes SW herself, and so when Catra later says Adora chose SW, not her in this moment, Catra is right, except that Adora believed she had no choice. Adora is also the only one in this moment who can reach the failsafe, and so it seems like fate is against her. Adora knows she's probably choosing to die, and if she does, she knows Catra will probably die of a broken heart as well. She really does choose SW over Catra, in a way. It's a tough moment, but taking the failsafe is the right thing to do, given the circumstances.

Receiving the failsafe is intense, and as Adora tries to withstand it, Micah binds the entire party with dark magic. Interestingly, this means SW indoctrinated Micah more than we're shown, and now that he's chipped, he is uninhibited.

Adora sees everyone is in danger, if she doesn't come through now it's all over. It gives her that singular focus she needs, summoning She-ra is easy because if she doesn't, Catra, all of them, are about to die.

Failsafe achieved, Micah vanquished, Adora offers Catra her hand, she's trying to show Catra she's there for her, they are together. But Catra rejects her, she's too sure that SW has won, that Adora will die. In this moment all the old trauma Catra carries is too strong, and SW has unnerved her too greatly. As Catra runs from her, Adora realizes that Catra was trying to tell her something deeper, but somehow she's missed it.

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>Catra watches Adora sleep, she's emotionally distraught at the thought of her dying. So, she tries to sneak away. Adora finds out, and manages to confront Catra before she can leave. This is one of the most heartbreakingly beautiful scenes about love in this show, but I'll just cover how SW's manipulations come into play...

>Adora tackles Catra, and demands she explain why she’s leaving. Catra throws SW's words back at Adora, that she's a distraction, that she makes Adora too weak to be She-ra. Catra knows this was a unfair manipulation by Shadow Weaver, but she couldn't see, only hear, what happened between Shadow Weaver and Adora. She doesn't know that Adora rejected Shadow Weaver so strongly, both spiritually and by violently pulling away from her. Adora tries her best to get Catra to see that she's not doing this because of Shadow Weaver's manipulation, that she's trying to rise above SW's control of her. But Catra pushes her away, instead trying to speak to a more central truth: Adora's need to serve everyone else's needs, her inability to regulate her desire to make things better for others who are hurting or will get hurt, and balance that against her own needs and safety. She's speaking to the part of Adora which Shadow Weaver is exploiting to get what she wants from her, to control her. It doesn't really matter in this moment to Catra whether Adora is doing it for Shadow Weaver or not, because either way Adora is allowing Shadow Weaver to win. Catra wants Adora to be better than a slave to her emotional need to help others no matter the cost or danger. She's asking Adora to be strong in herself in a way Adora has never been able to be. She challenges her, asking "What do you want, Adora?" The obvious answer, Catra believes, is her. But Adora is too worried she will die and let Catra down to let her romantic feelings about Catra manifest and make it real between them, and taking the failsafe has made Adora all the more doubtful of her own survival. Adora counters "I have to do this Catra, I'm the only one who can." It's all to say that Adora is alone in her burden, and she accepts it and its consequences because she's She-ra. Adora doesn't believe she has value, or deserves happiness unless she can save everyone, including Catra.

Adora believes as She-ra, she is totally alone in her burden. This is wrong of course, Catra does see her and understands her burden, and is the one person in the world who wishes to share that load with her, unlike the other princesses who need Adora to be a hero and save them. But both girls are weak from their deep traumas which Shadow Weaver has reaggravated, and they can't overcome them. Catra resigns herself to the belief that Adora is unable to rise above her most basic emotional need to serve others, telling her "Then do it. That's what you want, that's what you'll always choose." She can't stand to watch Adora kill herself so willingly to serve everyone else, all while letting SW win. She rejects Adora, and turns to leave. Adora desperately begs Catra to stay, wanting her to uphold their promise and telling her she needs her, but is unable to vocalize her desire to be with Catra romantically. Meanwhile, in Catra's mind, Adora is just going to let herself die, and if she does, then Adora never really needed her after all... all Adora cares about is being She-ra. It's harsh, but true... even if what she's doing about it is so wrong.

It's a painful moment for both of them, and it's horrible because Catra is so clearly breaking their promise, the one that Adora restored to Catra she came to rescue her from Horde Prime. And yet, her leaving will work in the end. Catra gets Adora to see how crucial it is that she not let Shadow Weaver win, to let Shadow Weaver get whatever she wants by taking that cost from Adora's own life. And it's how Adora finally becomes too strong for Shadow Weaver to ever manipulate again.

>As Adora returns to camp, still crying from Catra's abandonment, Shadow Weaver tries to swoop in and make her manipulations of Adora take their final hold. She tells Adora she "made the right choice, don't let Catra convince you otherwise, she's never understood." Dreaded ear touch and all. By saying Catra can't understand, Shadow Weaver tries to make Adora feel alone in her burden as She-ra, seeking to weaken her spirit. But we see a total shift in Adora's attitude as she rejects SW’s cruelty and manipulations entirely. Her words carry incredible weight and speak to how she's so clearly seen through SW's malicious manipulations of the two of them. "Stop. I will never forgive you. You ruin people. You ruin any chance they could ever be happy." Adora just watched Catra reject her and abandon her because she couldn't stand to lose Adora again over SW's manipulations. It's by knowing Catra's pain that Adora is able to finally deny Shadow Weaver any sliver of control over her. As always, Adora couldn't do it for herself, she couldn't resolve between her deeper need to save everyone and SW's plans to use her for her own gain. But Adora is strong for others, and so she's strong for Catra. By leaving, Catra has given Adora the ability to rise above any manipulation Shadow Weaver can do to her.

Adora stands up to Shadow Weaver once and for all in her next words: "I'm going to take the failsafe to the heart, and I'm going to save Etheria. But I am not doing it for you. I'll do everything I can to make sure you never get your hands on the magic." (pic1, fyi) Note the exact words Adora speaks here as we will return to them later, they are important. While Adora has seen past SW’s manipulations, and seen that Shadow Weaver only ever desired power, she doesn't realize how SW's childhood abuse of her and attempts to manipulate her in the present are making her too weak to survive deploying the failsafe. To get past that, Catra must help Adora.

EPISODE 12: We watch as Adora struggles to become She-ra, but eventually manages it. She's seen through SW's plan after all, and so she does her best to believe she is strong enough to win on her own, to survive the heart. But she misses Catra desperately. She rallies her people, and ends her speech by saying resolutely that she will take the failsafe to the Heart and destroy it. It's an incredible speech, Adora has become a wonderful leader, but then she looks up and sees Shadow Weaver hiding in the back. As SW meets her gaze, She-ra's form falters and we see Adora's face for a split second. She's furious at her, that she hurt Catra so badly that she ran away.

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Adora moves away from the group so they don't see her lose her She-ra form because of the turmoil she feels over Shadow Weaver and losing Catra. Bow and Glimmer check on Adora, knowing she has a tendency to try to sneak away so people won't see her risk her life. Glimmer is perceptive and asks about Catra, she knows it's Catra that Adora needs, that her being gone is tearing Adora up inside. Glimmer is a great friend to the both of them. Adora voices concern for their safety if they come with her, but Bow and Glimmer know Adora needs support. And so they will try their best, even though they know Adora is heartbroken from Catra leaving her.

>Buoyed by their support, Adora goes to the ruins to try to face her final task, to overcome it through her own strength alone. Bow and Glimmer take her hands, we see Adora does her best to set her fear aside. And yet, as they enter she wonders where Catra is, whether she will come back to honor their promise.

>Catra looks back, also experiencing pain over their separation. She has not been able to overcome her trauma, and manage her feelings. Well isn't it just nice to have a telepathic therapy pet! Melog stops, and forces her to actualize her feelings and process them. At first Catra tries to deny them, saying she won't go back, but Melog sits on her. She cries, saying out loud her deepest feelings. Let's take this one in steps. "You saw what happened, A-Adora chose Shadow Weaver, not me". In a very real sense Adora did do this, she pushed Catra away in the failsafe chamber. She ignored Catra's warnings and, in Catra's mind, committed herself to death at the hands of SW's manipulation. The next line is one of the most important in the series, but we will only cover it briefly as it's romantic implications are best discussed elsewhere: "Adora doesn't want me, not like I want her." We get to see one of the most honest truths about Catra: she is an intensely romantic person, and has always had the most incredible dreams of them being together. But a lifetime of pain has told Catra that it can't be real, or atleast, not for her. It is deep seated trauma that blocks her, trauma Shadow Weaver started and then aggravated against her, making her leave Adora just moments before. Catra is, in a word, furious that she's come this far, having dared to dream once again that the two of them could be together and in love, only to have SW come in and take that from her once again.

Let's take a moment to consider how Catra is doing as she adapts to her new emotional way of dealing with the world, as she has shifted her perspective since rejoining Adora: The old Catra might have simply struck SW down, maybe even killed her to remove the threat. But now, Catra doesn't want to do that but is expected to trust in Adora’s ability to overcome the threat through her inner strength, and the through the strength of her community. But, as far as Catra could see, Adora just accepted her death as necessary rather than fighting SW’s manipulations. And this worries her, and it's why it's so important to Catra that she not let Shadow Weaver win, so Catra leaves to make sure Adora gets the message. She's wrong to do this, and she realizes this after opening up to Melog. Adora needs Catra to have faith in her, because without her support, there's no chance Adora overcomes what Shadow Weaver is trying to do to her.

>Glimmer watches the doubt play across Adora's face. She doesn't know how to make it better, since Catra isn't with them. She asks her if she's scared, and Adora answers back as truthfully as she can: "No, I just really hope this works." She's putting on a good face while trying to believe there's a chance, but when Bow tells her it's going to be a whole new world when she's done, Adora doubts. Can she even survive? Will Catra be gone forever? The next scene is, of course, very romantic. We see that Adora has always loved Catra, just like Catra loves Adora. The magic is trying to remind Adora of her own desires, her wants. Let's not get too distracted though: as Adora moves on, vowing to not let the magic distract her, we see her She-ra form falter, she's still fighting despair and loneliness. Bow and Glimmer don't know what to do...

>Catra sees Horde Prime begin hacking the planet and knows Adora is in grave danger of not succeeding in her last, unselfish mission before Prime stops her. Catra can't let this happen, also, since Melog has helped her process her emotional pain, she's ready to support Adora in any way she can, even if it means her hopes and dreams of them being together will be unfulfilled. She tries to rush to her side.

>Adora is panicking and unable to resolve her feelings of failure to Catra, She-ra is in danger of fading again. She sees the sword as she saw it back when she first left Catra, her hand goes to the failsafe on her chest, the thing that made Catra reject her after she accepted it. She tells Bow and Glimmer she can't escape her destiny. The words "I'm losing her" speak to a deep held belief by Adora that she's not worthy of survival because she feels that she has never been able to help the one person she truly loves, making her no hero. All of the manipulations of Shadow Weaver, Horde Prime, even Light Hope are crushing down on her. She believes she has to accept her fate, to die to fulfill her duty as She-ra. It's the price she has to pay for not being good enough, for hurting Catra when she left her to become She-ra. She thanks Bow and Glimmer for their love and support. "I never could have done any of this without you." Bow and Glimmer did everything they could to prop Adora up, get her out of her depressions when she felt she wasn't good enough to be She-ra. But they still needed her to be She-ra, and therefore they can't help her get past her deepest insecurities. To do that, she needs someone who has unconditional love for her. She needs Catra. Adora leaves Bow and Glimmer behind, trying to protect them, so that only she will have to die.

>Catra finds Shadow Weaver patiently waiting to receive her power, to be able to achieve dominion over everyone else. SW tells Catra "She's gone to the heart of Etheria to free the magic and become the hero she was born to be." The dead hero, that is. As SW tries to guilt Catra, calling her selfish, she glares back. She stands up to SW, rejecting the manipulation: "Enough! This isn't about you and your messed up power trip anymore!”

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In this moment, Catra shows us how clearly she understands SW's goal. She calls her out perfectly. She tells SW that Prime is infecting the planet to take the heart, which changes everything, including for SW.

>As Catra leads SW, having forced her to cooperate, they see Prime's broadcast and Catra knows they have to act. She demands SW take them to Adora, and doesn't accept her lies. She knows SW can do it with magic, and demands she comply. Her words hit home "So do something good with it for once and help me save Adora before it's too late." Notice the similarity to when Glimmer asks Catra to be better on Horde Prime’s ship. SW is trapped, she has to comply. If Adora doesn't reach the heart, no magic for SW, universe ends. Catra accepts SW's hand, though it hurts her to do so.

>Catra and SW arrive in the corridor. As Catra gets the truth from Glimmer, she's dismayed. "Of course she's gone, that's what she does, isn't it?" She knows in this moment that Adora is consumed by fear, her inadequacies. As she finishes briefing Bow and Gimmer on the situation, she tells them she will stay to help Adora, and she invokes their promises to each other. It's an important moment, as it is the two of them together, their promises to each other, that gives them the strength to surpass SW's manipulations of them. Glimmer knows Catra is in love with Adora, so she leaves Adora in Catra's care. Bow’s words are important as well, speaking to the power of the Best Friend Squad. It gives Catra a boost to her morale, a belief that maybe there's a chance she and Adora can overcome the odds they face.

>Adora looks out over Etheria, seeing its beauty. Mara joins her. Adora tries to promise Mara that she will save the world, everyone, at any cost. Mara flat out rejects this as wrong, she doesn't let Adora promise. Mara confronts Adora on her decision to die for everyone else. When Mara asks her what she wants, Adora says it doesn't matter, that she's She-ra. Again, an isolationist view, a lonely burden, just like SW wants her to believe. Mara tells Adora that she, Adora, has value as a person, not only as a hero, and that she deserves love, too. As Mara tells to not lose hope, Adora is emotionally moved but you can tell she's still struggling to accept Mara’s words because of her feelings of inadequacy and loneliness. Mara manages to pass some courage to her, but then Horde Prime cuts them short.

Prime leans into Adora’s fears, threateningly. Like SW, he knows how to exploit her. He was in Catra's head and so he knows what Catra knows. He tells her that her failure is imminent, that she is already defeated, like the other She-ra's. The guardian monster then strikes and infects Adora, and she finally loses her grip on her She-ra form. He tells her even her own people didn't want her to make it to the heart, telling her the whole world is against her, and that she's totally alone. She tries to counter this with defiance, but the virus has her. She knows she's in trouble.

----Part 3: Final Moments, and Death, of SW----

>Episode 13. Adora is in pain, trying to understand the nature of the infection. The monster towers over her, it has only to reach out to deal the killing blow, she's defenseless. Suddenly Catra shows up, engaging the monster. Adora's only concern is for Catra's safety, telling her to leave her because it's too dangerous. But Catra has decided: she will do whatever it takes to give Adora her chance to save the universe, if that's what she wants. Even if it means Adora has to die. She tells SW to get Adora to the heart, which Adora objects to. SW is looking closely at Adora and seeing her illness, evaluating. As Adora begs for Catra to not leave her, Catra tells Adora she'll catch up. After all, they are the best friend squad. Bow's words have given Catra a small amount of hope that maybe it'll be ok. Adora, now that Catra has finally shown up, is desperate to not lose her again, and knows fighting this monster is too dangerous for her alone. But she's sick, and unable to help her. SW takes Adora unwillingly towards the heart.

>Catra is doing her best, but the monster is too much, even for her. She tries to slip away, seeing the virus continuing to spread. She's trying to get to Adora, who’s alone with SW. Horde Prime stops her (no keep running!!) and she gets caught. He mocks her, telling her he expected better. But Catra has already surpassed his greatest expectations, and she'll stop him yet... as the monster catches her, she cries out in anguish. It seems the cruelty of the universe has caught up to her again, after all...

>As SW tries to bring Adora to the heart, Adora's sickness is rapidly advancing. She demands SW wait, but she's too weak to resist. The thought of losing Catra again is weakening her spirit and allowing the virus to take over. SW tells her not to lose her focus, she's still hoping Adora will deploy the failsafe before dying. But then the virus seemingly attacks Adora's heart and SW watches the failsafe nearly fade out. SW looks up, she's close enough to already siphon power from the heart. Her lust for power is apparent.

As Adora hears Catra’s scream, she forcefully pushes herself from SW, and starts to go back for Catra. SW calls for her to wait, but Adora leaves her behind.

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This is it, the turning point. The great moment of truth: SW now realizes, in utter totality, that she's never going to get to have the power. It's one of the most important moments in the series, and what happens next is the culmination of all of the hard emotional growth the two girls have been doing.

>>Quick interjection: we’re about to get emotional here... (well, I do). Just a light suggestion to check your surroundings. <<

Shadow Weaver now realizes that, even if she were to drag Adora to the heart, she would be too sick and heartbroken to deploy it. It's over for SW, either she dies now, with everyone else in the end of the universe, or she dies giving everyone else, including the girls, a future.

Remember as well, Adora has told SW that she would do everything she can to make sure she never gets the power. Adora is too strong against SW's manipulations, something Adora learned from seeing the pain Shadow Weaver caused Catra through her abuse. I mentioned that the exact words Adora used when she rejected SW the night before were important, so let's return to them: Adora told SW she would deploy the failsafe, and also that she will block SW from getting the power for herself. But as she said all of this, about saving the world, the universe, she doesn't say one, very important, word.

Promise.

Adora may have dedicated herself to being She-ra, but somehow in that moment she knew not to promise to SW that she would deploy the failsafe to save the universe, instead only saying that she was going to find a way, while making sure SW doesn't get the power. We saw that Adora later tried to make this particular promise to Mara, but Mara threw that out, telling Adora to be better, to rise above her lack of self belief.

A promise was made, though. She promised Catra. Their beautiful, childhood promise, the one she so casually broke way back when, her greatest mistake. And so Adora goes back for Catra, to be there for her, to try to help. If this Catra's end, she will be there for her... even if the cost is this high. She can't just let her die alone. She is honoring their promise...

And so… Adora finally… after all this time, puts Catra above her duty as She-ra. Her love for Catra is more important than fulfilling her heroic duty, and so SW can no longer manipulate her into giving up her life so SW can get the power. The girls have, in fact, transcended her manipulations, and as Adora leaves SW standing by the heart, SW is totally alone and without anything, anyone, left. She is, in fact, defeated by the girl’s love for each other... and so as SW looks towards the heart, she finally... makes... the right... choice. She gathers enough power from the heart to fight the monster...

>Horde Prime mocks Carta as she tries in vain to resist being pulled towards her death. When he invokes Adora's name, saying she will die, Catra shows her sadness, disappointment, at having come so close to being with her. He mocks her again, asking her if it was worth it. Catra shows defiance, then sorrow. The answer is yes, of course. Catra was willing to lay it all down to give Adora her shot at saving the universe, she's honoring their promise as best she can even if this is Adora's final act before her, and their, deaths. Catra has total belief that in this moment, that she needed to sacrifice herself for Adora. It seems like the natural outcome of fate, of the cruelty that is SW's and the universe's betrayals of the two of them their entire lives...

Heroic. Fucking. Music. SW shows up, charged from the Heart to take Catra's place. She's going to do one heroic and worthy thing of remembrance before she goes, since she is defeated and knows she won't get to have the heart's power.

Carta's disbelief is total, she can't understand how SW would ever do this for her. Her manipulation of them their whole lives was so total, so unfeeling. And yet, here she is. SW tells Carta to get to Adora and run. She forces Catra back and blocks the door. Catra still can't understand... and we finally... see Shadow Weaver show some actual real remorse for how empty her life is. She begs Catra to take Adora to the heart, to set the magic free. The one thing SW is dedicated to is magic, and she knows releasing the magic will restore the planet. Catra points out the obvious, that SW will die. Part of the reason Catra is so broken up by SW doing this is because Catra had just accepted her fate of dying in order to give Adora her chance to save everyone: Catra was willing to die for Adora even if Adora never found the courage to want Catra the way Catra wants her. And now SW takes her place? It doesn't make sense to her, as SW is a greedy person.

Shadow Weaver’s next series words are some of the most important in the entire series. And this is also the one redeeming quality she has... that she is a teacher. And she’s about to tell Catra something very, very... important.

She says: "It's too late for me." All her manipulations towards getting the power at the cost of the girls lives have been torn down, they've completely moved past her, she has no place in their lives anymore. The girls have learned to love each other so loyally that SW is done, finished.

"But you... this is only the beginning for you." Catra listens to this, searching for the deeper meaning... "I'm so proud of you, Catra." I think we all agree SW being 'proud' of Catra is a devastating line, Catra doesn't need or probably even want her abusers approval. I also think it is a lie, everything about SW says she's unable to feel actual compassion. But SW is a mastermind, and I think she's telling Catra she has respect for her. Catra ended up being the greatest enemy SW ever faced, she was so smart that she saw right through every manipulation SW made, and in the end, SW couldn't touch her. But theorizing aside, we see Catra cry... somehow, someway, SW finally seems to be showing Catra some amount of good in her, and so she cries, wondering where it comes from…

As Catra brings her hand back to uselessly flail at the barrier, Adora catches it. Catra looks back at Adora, surprised at her reappearance...

… right then we see Catra suddenly look away from Adora. It's quick, but we're seeing a dissociative moment: this is Catra realizing something very deep, and very meaningful...

Catra realizes, that in this moment, SW has chosen to do something that is much more than just dying in Catra's place.

She has given Adora to her.

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All of Catra's life, Shadow Weaver has stood between her and Adora, love was a thing Catra was not allowed to have. But the girls, together, have transcended all of her abuse and manipulation. They have seen through her plan and risen above every cruelty, and have blocked SW's manipulations to use them for her own gain. And so, a defeated SW chooses now, to give Catra the most beautiful of gifts...

Catra puts it all together, filled with clarity: SW is telling her that Adora doesn't have to die, she can survive this. That they can survive the Heart!!! And Catra is the key, as SW has told her: "This is only the beginning, for you."

Catra is now given this knowledge freely by SW, and thus given hope. SW stands before them, totally defeated, in awe of Catra's incredible growth and cunning and that she was able to see through her plan, and how strongly the two girls have come to love each other. So, SW is giving Catra her fullest respect, and as a last act before her death she is passing Catra newfound hope that the two of them can overcome this, that they can survive...

Shadow Weaver removes her mask, showing Catra her face. It's not a face of manipulation, as we expect, no, there's respect, even, dare I say, gratitude. SW didn't have to do this, Catra knows that. And yet, Catra managed to show SW something she never expected to see. And so, by outthinking and so totally defeating her, by making SW see that all her manipulations were discovered and therefore wouldn't work no matter which way she turned, and by getting Adora understand the urgency of not letting SW win, Catra has won this final, beautiful gift…

“You're welcome…”

As Catra watches SW make her final sacrifice... her one good deed... she looks on, stunned. Life is never quite so simple as you think it is, and since returning to Adora, Catra has seen so many acts of generosity she didn't really believe were possible... and now... this...

Catra lets Adora cry for a moment, then tells her they have to go. Catra is filled with new urgency... they will face this final challenge together. As she resolutely carries Adora towards the heart, she knows she's now in charge of their fate... and as they face this final task, Catra is searching for a way to save Adora, and to save their love once and for all...

~

All of this has huge implications for what then happens with the girls when they reach the heart chamber, but that's a topic better discussed another time…

Some final notes here. It's my belief that Shadow Weaver is the overarching villain of the story, who spans all seasons of She-ra, and is far more important to the plot than Horde Prime is. Furthermore, understanding Shadow Weaver as this kind of villain is a stepping stone to explaining many other important plot points in the series, and we can build on it to understand a lot of the most important moments in the show.

My personal belief about this story is that the writers had such a diverse room of people of LGBTQIA+ and other backgrounds, each with their own trials and pains they had to overcome, that as a team, their goal was to bring to light as many of these struggles that they could. But as for this most central story, my guess is they wanted to tell us a story about overcoming real darkness that exists in our world, as well as Etheria, because sometimes that's how it is. And so the right thing, the only thing to do is to overcome and move past such people, to not let them control your life.

All this is to say that I think the moral of Shadow Weaver in the story isn't about finding the good in her, but about rising above her and the fundamental darknesses that we all sometimes face. And our girls do this through love, at no point do they use violence. And that makes this story very, very... special.

Thanks for reading. Until next time…

~EtheriaDearie

P.S. :: as I am new to tumblr, if you enjoyed reading this, please consider giving me a reblogg! Thanks!! 🙇💛


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4 years ago

Shadow Weaver’s Death, Her True Abusiveness, And Her Final, Beautiful, Gift To Catra

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::The resistance fighters stand in the failsafe chamber. Catra has just called Shadow Weaver out on her manipulation. Shadow Weaver reluctantly explains the danger of the failsafe, and then implores Adora to take it: even if she fails, SW says, she will save her friends, and the universe. As literally every other person in that room cries out against Adora taking the risk, Adora turns and says she will do it. Catra, dismayed, runs to her telling her that SW is sacrificing her, and demands to know why she’s letting her do that. Adora tells Catra “Because even if she is, it’s better than Prime getting the Heart and destroying the universe.” Catra trembles in deathly fear, her face consumed in terrible realization: if Adora does as SW wishes, she will die. Shadow Weaver is trying to kill Adora. She knows this to her very soul, because… she is Shadow Weaver… And Adora is letting it happen…

Hi there, my name is Joel, and in this segment I’ll be looking at Shadow Weaver’s death, her being a child abuser, her terrible manipulations of Catra and Adora and the monstrous pains the two girls have to conquer to save themselves from her.

The main premise I’ll be trying to explain here is that, like Horde Prime, Shadow Weaver is a villain of utmost seriousness. And, like Horde Prime, the girls will treat her as one, surpassing and defeating her once and for all. But it won’t be with violence, but instead with love, creating a beautiful story of two people transcending their trauma and hurt through coming together over their love for one another.

I feel obliged to warn readers: this post will cover child abuse, even predatation. It may be hard to read. Also warning: tl;dr, please consider at least sitting down to read this!

Finally, I know there are SW fans out there; that’s good. Shadow Weaver is, at times, cool af. But, definitively a terrible person within the plot of the show.

So, even if you’re a fan of SW, I still encourage you to read along because as we reveal her truth and the damage she deals to Catra and Adora, it makes her final moment so, so much more beautiful… and it gives entirely new meaning to her final… two… words….

Disclaimer time: Taking on Shadow Weavers death is ambitious for a first post, I know. But understanding her is crucial to understanding most of the major moments in this show. Still, I should say here that while this may seem a bit ‘head’ canon-y, I assure you my conclusions come from watching the show carefully and referencing the entirety of the rest of the show back to this one moment. I’m instead positing these as theories, and let’s just say I feel I have the data, and Data Never Lies! Please *do* ask questions or seek calcifications in the comments or Ask me anything (I’m new to Tumblr).

—-Part 1: Catra, Micah, and the Truth—-

To start this journey we will travel backwards in the series to investigate the what and why of the terrible child abuse Catra suffered growing up under SW’s care. We will be looking chiefly at the Light Spinner episode in the 2nd season. We will cover Catra’s confrontation and SW’s -supposed- explanation for her abuse, then the tale of Micah and SW’s manipulation of him, and then the terrible truth of why Catra -really- was abused.

>A terribly alone Catra asks her abusive mother why she did it. Why did she treat her so badly ?

Keep reading


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4 years ago

“Promise”

Why can't you just… Promise ?

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Today's goal is an in-depth look at one of the most beautiful and breathtaking episodes of She-ra: "Promise"

Storywise, it's incredibly important to the series, and focuses entirely on Catradora. It's the first time since Adora left Catra behind to seek out the sword that the girls really have an opportunity to talk, and things are not going well. Both of them are royally pissed off at the other, with good reason.

For Adora, we're gonna deflate that proud hair poof of hers a bit, as we'll take an honest look at her as a person at this point in her life. And Catra... she's really guarding her feelings closely, as she's already deeply angry with Adora. But we will use the combination of Catra's younger self in the memories they see, plus looking at other times in the series that relate to this episode, where she was less guarded, in order to understand her as a person at this time. Also: warning: tl;dr, best enjoyed while cozy with a drink..

To get started, we skip to when they end up stuck together…

After Adora takes drastic measures to ward off the security spiders by collapsing the tunnel, the girls are now stuck together, and so… they talk...

We immediately see how incredibly irritated they are with each other as Adora chides Catra for being in the Crystal Castle, since the monsters will continue to attack them as long as she's protecting Catra… only to have Catra retort that she didn't ask for protection. Some snippy bickering back and forth happens, then...

Adora asks: "Does Shadow Weaver know you're here?" Very deadpan assertion from Adora. She knows Catra must be disobeying orders, she just doesn't know why.

"I'd say Shadow Weaver has bigger problems right now". Catra is already starting her move against SW back at the Horde. With SW abusively blocking her every move within the Horde, and now that Catra knows that SW was going to mind wipe Adora, Catra has decided she must deal with her abuser.

Adora puts on her telltale sideways grin, and Catra chafes at Adora's flirtation, saying "I told you it's not because I like you” downplaying Adora’s suggestion that this was the reason she let her go. Catra freely admits here that she does like Adora, but it's not the real reason she did it. Still, Catra doesn't explain further, and we see later that Catra often lets Adora explain away her actions this way... but that Adora constantly misses the deeper truths.

"Where are your new best friends? I thought you did everything together". She's very snarky and dismissive of Adora and her flirting. She's mad about Adora leaving her for her new life.

"The ones you let SW imprison and curse?" Adora is angry at Catra for what she did, which was a sudden escalation of things by Catra.

"Yeah obviously, what other friends would I be talking about?" An obvious dig at Adora for leaving her, everything behind. She deadpans this, staring back plainly. Catra is obviously really angry at Adora... while Adora is legitimately mad at Catra for doing something so nasty to Bow and Glimmer...

::Let's take a moment to talk about Catra's feelings about Adora's new friends: Catra feels horribly betrayed by this. Adora completely tossed her aside, and replaced her with Bow and Glimmer. What comes to mind is at the end of Sea Gate, Catra is thrown in the water and then looks up at Adora, who is celebrating and cuddling with Bow and Glimmer. Catra is emotionally forlorn watching this, as Scorpia comes to drag her off to safety, Adora doesn't even look back towards her.

She's forgotten, Adora showed no love towards her at all in that scene (and then hardly any at Princess Prom, either). Adora ignored her plea for her to return, she didn't reach out to Catra at all. And now she watches her cuddle with her new friends: everything Catra thought she had with Adora meant nothing, and she's been replaced with these feel goodie goods who are fawning all over Adora.

Suffice to say, Catra couldn't do this, she's got way too many issues with emotional intimacy and touch aversion. So she watches Adora, seeing that what she offered her wasn't good enough, knowing because of it she's forgotten. Catra was trying really hard to be a close friend to Adora in spite of her issues, but as we will see, Adora wasn't trying to understand what was going on with Catra. And because of this, Catra was too afraid to express her affection openly, and yet here's Adora... accepting all of Bow and Glimmer’s love, for which Adora really did nothing to earn. Adora took Catra’s friendship for granted while ignoring her deeper needs, as will be explained, then completely abandons her, not even seeming to miss her. Catra is deeply hurt by the unfairness of this.

>Catra stares back at Adora, frustrated when she doesn't even acknowledge their lost friendship.

"Well, we don't need to go together. You do your weird little magic quest thing I'll find my own way out". Catra looks resentfully at the sword on Adora's back as she says this. Catra is laying down boundaries, except it's useless since they are trapped together. But, boundaries are important to Catra and as the episode progresses, Adora shows that she doesn't really understand Catra's.

>As they walk along, both girls' shadows loom equally tall. The symbolism is that in this story, both are equally important... it's also a shockingly beautiful sequence. (pic above)

After entering the room of infinite darkness, Catra tries to separate from Adora but the door is gone, they are stuck together. Weird things start happening. As the Fright Zone appears, both of them are confused. Adora decides to suspect Catra, after all, she attacked her friends. But as Adora grabs Catra, Catra is surprised and confused... Catra doesn't like being touched unexpectedly, Adora knows this but is ignoring that and attacking her. She gets treated as an enemy when she clearly hasn't done anything wrong, and it sets the tone for the two of them: Adora has constantly treated Catra as an enemy since the very moment she defected, not even trying to understand Catra's point of view. And so Catra increasingly emotionally distances herself from Adora. Catra angrily casts Adora's arm aside, not liking being vilified by her, and Adora doesn't understand why Catra is so upset. Catra slips away to explore, needing space from her.

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The way Adora immediately suspects and then attacks Catra is symbolic to the whole episode: by defecting to the Rebellion, Adora chose to start treating Catra, and her entire unit, as enemies, backing it up with hostility. But Catra doesn't really agree that the horde is evil... in her experience, it's just how life is.

>The two girls, now separated, call out to each other. Adora hears Catra's call, then another: young Catra is behind her, looking lost and insecure. Catra joins Adora as their first memory has just begun…

~DISCLAIMER TIME~ A lot of information in She-ra is inferred by emotional context, so if this seems a bit head-canon-y, I assure you, I have data! Please ask questions and seek clarifications, I promise to answer back! ~EtheriaDearie

>A worried and hurt young Catra runs to young Adora's side. She is emotional and needs support. Adora checks her out then gets the real deal: Catra was in a fight with an adult. It hints that Catra always had to deal with people messing with her, even before SW began her abuse. This is a guess, but it's probable: this is likely a happy memory of the two of them right before the hurting began. Along with the "promise" memory and the moments immediately preceding their entering the Black Garnet chamber, these scenes set the baseline for what their friendship was like before Catra suffered SW’s abuse. Also, this memory is a happy one, and how Adora remembers their friendship: it was likely triggered by her memories. The next ones are not, as I believe they are triggered by Catra, who is trying to explain to Adora what was so painful about their childhood...

>Catra doesn't know what to expect when she shows Octavia to Adora. She probably expects Adora to try to apologize on her behalf, or to give her a hard time about what she did. Instead, Adora sticks with her friend and yells “Hey Octavia, you're a dumbface." This brings young Catra much joy, Adora is sticking with her, not passing judgement. The two young girls run together hand in hand, experiencing childhood bliss, but it doesn't last. The present versions of themselves return, holding hands...

They share a brief moment of connection before Catra pulls her hand away in anger. Adora is surprised at the strength of Catra’s reaction. They are not on intimate terms any more, in fact, I suspect they had been struggling for a while before Adora's defection. Adora doesn't want the moment to stop, but Catra does. It hints that the gulf between them is already wide.

"How can you deal with all this magic stuff?" Catra has a deep distrust of magic, as it was used in her abuse. She resents it, and throughout the series whenever anything magic happens that she doesn't see coming she gets creeped out.

"I'm only dealing with it because I need to figure out how to heal Glimmer after someone got her cursed." It's a valid criticism, but Catra deflects it.

"What do you want? An apology? You're not getting one." We don't get the full story on this moment until season 5 when a young Catra tells Adora she'll "never say sorry to anybody, ever." Adora doesn't like Catra just refusing to explain, and as Catra pushes her away, Catra is full of reproach at Adora's judgement.

::As an abused child, Catra was continuously vilified and abused by everyone but Adora. And when Adora would suggest she apologize throughout their lives, she can't understand why Catra won't. It comes down to literally everyone in the world judging Catra and being cruel. Not once did any of them apologize to her, even though she didn't do anything to deserve the abuse. Except Adora... but that has issues, too. In fact, SW literally tells her "I won't apologize" regarding her abuse of Catra. Can you imagine the hurt at that?

Promise

[pic caption: Catra refuses to apologize, Catra often shows her deeper emotions while blinking, in this case: the incredible pain she experienced from SW’s abuse.]

So no, Catra won't apologize, she had a thing she was trying to do by kidnapping Bow and Glimmer and taking her sword, and it ended badly. But she felt she had a good reason to do it: she wanted to force Adora to see her, to make her acknowledge how big of a part of Adora’s life Catra used to be. And it's not like anyone has been helping Catra, she's had to make every single decision on her own her entire life and live with the consequences.

Also, mistakes for Catra have an entirely different meaning than they do for Adora. Whenever Adora made a mistake, she was given an opportunity to fix it. This is a theme of their relationship: Adora expects Catra to let her fix her mistakes. But for Catra, she learned that any mistake she made was dangerous, as when she did make a mistake, SW would torture her for it. And if other people saw it too, they'd use it to perpetuate the notion that she's some kind of no good fuck up. So Catra is extremely careful to not make mistakes, and if she does, she tries to cover it up, distance herself from it. (note: this isn't the same as Catra's intentional rebellions against this system where she was unfairly targeted for abuse-). This is why Catra simply cannot forgive Adora easily for breaking her promise: in Catra's world, she had to be perfect, or she could have been dead by SW's hand. She wasn't allowed to make mistakes like Adora is, she is what is clinically known as 'hyper vigilant' and always preparing for the worst. And so she applies this standard to be perfect all the time to Adora, and therefore she won't give Adora the same license to make mistakes with their friendship. Catra thinks Adora should know better, and see the consequences of her actions.

>Adora lets it go: when Catra seems to shut down, Adora does her best to try to accept her. Adora tries a different track. She asks Catra why she let her and Glimmer go when SW had them imprisoned, when it could have resulted in Catra getting in trouble. Catra walks ahead, trying to distance herself from having to answer. But the magic of the Crystal Castle intervenes: as Adora slips and begins to fall, Catra saves her. It's a symbolic moment: Catra has always tried to protect Adora, to save her from pain. It's why she changed course to give the sword back to her, partly.

"Did you really think I'd just let SW erase your memory like that?"

"I don't know. Probably." Adora shows such little understanding of their friendship. It shows Adora really is thinking of Catra as an enemy, not as the complicated person stuck between protecting her friend, and the cruel necessities of her life.

Catra looks at Adora with disappointment. "Yeah, well, you never did have too much faith in me." Adora tries to understand Catra's emotions, fails.

"Huh, can you blame me?" Ouch. Adora smiles at Catra, trying to show love for her roguish quirks. But it just shows how little Adora understands: she is repeating a negative stereotype of Catra that everyone in their old life believes and perpetuates. And Adora should know better, instead of just assuming the worst about her. That persona is one which Catra uses to protect herself, partly from her own emotional feelings, but also as a necessity to protect herself from SW. She had to act like she doesn't care, doesn't try, so SW wouldn't see her power.

"Psh, not really." As Catra turns away, again she deadpans this but you can see pain and disappointment leaking past her indifference.

As she walks away she trails her tail across Adora's hand, flirting and drawing Adora's attention to her butt. It's a cute little moment of telling a truth to counter the lie: 'Adora, you should know me better, and also, I like you.' Still, it's only a half truth: Catra couldn't let SW win because SW is Catra's true enemy. But, Adora takes the flirtatious hint, as always. She accepts it and doesn't dig deeper.

Catra asks Adora about their childhood, trying to understand how Adora could just throw it all away. Adora gives a very direct and impassioned speech, she looks Catra in the eyes, trying to convince her and make her understand why leaving was the right thing to do. Catra hides her emotions, weighing Adora's answer. She doesn't agree with her sentiment, in Catra's experience good and evil are relative and exist as such everywhere. Also, she's right: we meet many people in the Horde who aren't evil. And Adora's finding the sword is one giant sinister manipulation by Light Hope. Moral grayness is a constant theme in this show. Still, this isn't really why Catra chooses to stay with the Horde.

Adora sees her explanation failing to convince Catra, so she tries reminding Catra of their deeper friendship, telling her she misses her too. Catra is temporarily taken aback at being called out before remembering to deny it. She tells Adora to get over herself, and Adora tells her she won't stop until Catra says she likes her. They flirtatiously rough house, and Catra smiles during it: yeah, she does. But she denies it anyways.

::Adora often tries to be respectful of Catra's personal space but is making an exception here: she's telling her that she finds her desirable, and if Catra wanted it, they could be together. Adora can't understand why Catra feels the need to resist this, but she knows doing it helps her friend feel wanted. Still, this shows how casually Adora views their attraction.

Yes, they should be together. And actually, they had an unspoken agreement that they would be. But Catra's not going to open herself up to that just to serve her desire. She wants more from Adora, for Adora to show her that she really does see her, and cares about her. If she did, maybe Catra could open up about some of her pain. Being intimate without doing that would be impossible, and so far Catra's life still isn't safe enough to risk her feelings. Adora's promotion could have meant the beginning of something new between them, where they worked together to build a more secure future together where Catra didn't have to be fearful all the time. But instead, Adora left her.

So begins the second memory. The two girls, now teenagers, compete against each other in sparring. It's clear they are flirting, and neither is fighting all out. When Catra taunts Adora by putting her finger to her forehead, she shows how much better she is at fighting. She full heartedly laughs, Adora enjoys this and then throws a purposefully weak strike to restart the fight. When Adora seemingly turns the tables through brute force, Catra plays hurt to exploit Adora's naiveness. As Adora tries to show concern, Catra turns the tables back. She wants to teach Adora a lesson: that not everyone will play fair, as Catra knows all too well from SW's abuse. But Lonnie interrupts her. Catra doesn't appreciate this and makes quick work of Lonnie, showing just how good she is. Adora attacks, getting the predetermined win. Catra doesn't enjoy the beat down but accepts Adora's help up. She heads to Lonnie as Adora receives compliments from their commander.

As Catra confronts Lonnie, she tells Catra "you were playing dirty, I was just leveling the field". Catra will hear these words again when she leaves Adora behind in frustration near the end of the episode. They are significant: these are stereotypical views forced on Catra, and those views ignore that Catra was just doing something she felt was important: teaching Adora about the harsh realities that exist in the world. Real enemies don't play by the rules, and will be unpredictable.

As Catra’s anger rises at this, Adora puts her hand on Catra's shoulder to calm her down, then compliments Catra on her fighting skills. Catra ever so casually tosses the comforting hand aside. She's saying 'I can handle my emotions without your help, but thanks for asking.' As she tells Adora she let her win, Adora tries to tell if Catra really is ok.

Thus starts one of cutest exchanges between the two of them: as Catra tries to explain why she lets Adora win, Adora puts on her sideways 'you like me' grin while she playfully denies that Catra let her win. Catra gives a very animated and obviously made up explanation about not wanting to have people expect things from her. Adora grins along, and halfway through her lie Catra leans in, staring at Adora's lips before looking up into her eyes. Once again, Catra is undoing a lie by telling a truth: she let her win because she likes (loves) her. But it's only a half truth, once again...

Adora accepts the explanation, keeping her sideways grin: 'it's so cute how you like me'. Catra's explanation done, Adora moves on, wanting to catch up with their unit. Catra lets her do so while excusing herself. As Adora leaves, a huge amount of meaningful information passes across Catra's face…

First, Catra feels bad about having to lie to Adora, and it shows. Then, as Adora leaves to socialize, disappointment and rejection shows: Catra had hoped Adora might look deeper, and try to see the deeper truth. As Adora turns away and leaves we see a look of total love and adoration on Catra's face. She really, really loves Adora. She's the light of her life, a real idiot no doubt but Catra will always love her for exactly who she is.

Promise

The girls remain their younger selves as the rest of the memory plays out, Adora staying to accept praise while Catra separates to deal with her internal feelings which Adora always fails to see: the hurt and aloneness she feels.

>A frustrated young Catra cries, expressing her repressed emotions. It would be easiest to assume she cries because she's sad about losing, but we have to look ahead to the next memory to find the real truth.

Catra is sad because she never had a choice. SW took that choice from her, and while Catra is happy to let Adora win because of the love she feels for her, it hurts that she never really got to decide. And Adora doesn't see that, doesn't see the pain Catra is bearing, hiding. And so she cries for that, too. The one person who should love her doesn't really see her. As she looks up in the mirror to see herself, since no one else in her life seems to see her pain, she sees her present tearful self looking back. The pain of the past is real in the present, and while she's older now and won't let herself give in to tears, she feels the pain as she did back then. (pic 1, below) She sees the tears and it snaps her back to her present self, totally unnerved by the simulation as the security detects her and attacks. A fearful Catra screams, wanting help, wanting Adora.

>Adora snaps back to herself, having been participating in the replay of the memory post Catra excusing herself. She tries to run to help Catra, full of worry. She sees a terrified Catra trapped by the spider. As the spider begins to drag her away the two girls lock arms, trying to free Catra. But it's too strong, and as we see their grip start to slip, Catra looks to Adora wanting, pleading for help. As Catra is pulled away, Adora feels helpless, knowing she couldn't help her friend. She thumps her head in frustration that she wasn't there for Catra.

The scene speaks to an obvious truth: Adora has never quite been there enough for Catra. She's always less present, less aware of Catra's reality than she could have been. But since Catra was experiencing a painful memory when this happened, her reaction shows her vulnerable emotional state, and so she called out for help: Catra just wants to feel safe, for Adora to be there to help her. But she wasn't.

>As Catra is dragged away, she feels helpless, and calls out mournfully for Adora. But she's long gone; Catra is alone and scared, as usual. She screams out her frustration, the realization that she’s never gotten the help she needed, she always ends up alone. She cries tears for the suffering and anguish she feels from that. (pic 2, below) It’s a moment that shows us the real inner Catra: She feels deeply, whether it be her desire to be seen, loved by Adora, or the fear she feels in this moment and others. She tries her best to act confident in herself, but it's a lie: she needs support, yet is left behind by everyone, including Adora. She was willing to bear her pain for Adora's love, but she has become increasingly aware of how tenuous that really was growing up.

>Catra digs deep, like she's always done. She will handle this, won't take the abuse lying down. She shifts her mentality to being the survivor, the person who has survived years of abuse. She frees herself and gets to her feet, accessing her foe, determined to defeat it. She attacks, using her anger to deal damaging blows, seeking to destroy her enemy, to make sure she survives. She stands back, confident she's won, proud of herself for it. She doesn't quit, she always perseveres against those who want to destroy her. (pic 3)

Promise

Adora shows up, finishing the monster. Catra doesn't drop her mentality, this person who has lived a separate life from Adora and survived on her own, doing the hard things like winning fights and resisting Shadow Weaver's abuse.

Adora walks forward, seeing Catra's anger, determination. She looks blankly, trying not to upset Catra. She's trying to get a read on Catra but not having any luck, so she's being cautious. She asks if Catra is ok, casually pulling webbing off Catra's shoulder, trying to exist in her physical space without upsetting Catra further. "I had it" says Catra, not dropping her fighter stance, mentality at all. Catra is very much feeling the aloneness of her life from everyone, including Adora.

Adora tries to casually put aside Catra's assertion that she had it, she smiles diplomatically. She tries again to touch Catra, to break down her animosity and get her to calm down. It doesn't work. "We need to make sure we stick together from now on." As Adora touches Catra, she tenses, uncomfortable. Catra has strong touch aversion, and Adora knows this but she also knows doing it sometimes helps Catra shift her mentality, so she's trying to get Catra to connect emotionally, to get her to accept care.

"Will you stop telling me what to do?" An exasperated Catra says. We see a look of total dismay cross Adora's face. She's not understanding why Catra has so much animosity in this moment. (pic below)

As Adora looks at Catra, she hunches her body, looking misunderstood and isolated. Adora has consistently failed to see Catra's emotional states and so Catra is feeling more and more apart; that the mentality of the survivor she's feeling now is the right one. Adora didn't really help her at all growing up, and she doesn't see her for who she really is, either. Adora always took the easy explanation, like saying that Catra did things for her because she liked her. Never looking deeper, trying to see her struggle. And so Catra doesn't drop her combative pose, she stays in it because she feels in control, less vulnerable.

As for the words "stop telling me what to do", that's an essay in itself but consider: just now Adora became frustrated when she lost Catra, and now tells her they need to stay together. But they didn't, they never did, and even when they are together Adora is no real help to Catra. So she reacts in anger to Adora trying to direct her. After all, in the next scene we will see that Adora leads Catra into danger, and then doesn't really help her as she gets abused. Adora is no great leader, not according to Catra's experience.

::Adora is having a total loss, here, as she tries to understand Catra, why she's angry at her: It's because she has never really known this 'survivor' side of Catra. Adora wants to comfort her and calm her down, but Catra isn't having it. I think this is when we first see Adora begin to realize that there is something is very wrong with her friend that she has completely failed to see, and she's deeply worried by it. (pic 2)

Promise

[pic cation: Adora can't read Catra's emotions, Adora realizes Catra is deeply angry. Outside SW’s chamber, Adora wants to take Catra’s hand.]

Adora loves Catra, but can't seem to get through to her: Catra is holding herself apart from Adora. Again, Catra pushes Adora's hand aside, frustrated. She expresses her exasperation at the situation, saying she's sick of what's going on. Adora follows along, confused. As Catra seemingly purposefully leaves her behind, Adora demands to know what Catra's problem is, saying that she was trying to save her. Catra looks down at her confrontationally, frustrated with Adora's lack of vision. "For the last time, I don't need you to save me. I've been doing just fine on my own. No thanks to you." Uh oh.

The words "no thanks to you" are especially cutting. Adora has totally failed to see the struggles Catra had all her life, she didn't understand the hurt and abuse Catra was fighting against. And so Catra did it all on her own, protecting herself and trying to remain strong. Her love of Adora might have helped her have hope, but fundamentally Catra overcame the abuse by not giving up on herself, believing she had worth, and not letting others tear her down.

Adora runs to Catra's side, taking her arm in one hand. Feeling her friend becoming increasingly distant from her, Adora tries authentically telling Catra her feelings, hoping to make her friend see her desire to help and understand her. Adora explains that she's sorry for leaving and that she did it because she couldn't stand the war the Horde has pursued. Her next words are telling: "but I never wanted to leave you". 'Want' is an important word in this series, and it comes up again in season 5 when Catra asks Adora "what do you want, Adora?”. By choosing to leave the Horde, Catra feels that Adora wanted that more than she wanted what they had together. Also, promises are not something you're supposed to break over a 'want'. And Adora so casually breaking their promises makes Catra think she doesn't matter to Adora. It's not the truth, but this belief still determines her reaction in this moment. Even though Adora dearly loves Catra, including at this point in the story, she hasn't shown it in a way that Catra can see as meaningful. As Adora finishes saying this, Catra looks back, feeling alone and unwanted, seemingly thinking 'but you did leave me, Adora.'

Adora tries to appeal to Catra to join the rebellion with her. Then she says "I know you're not a bad person, Catra. You don't belong with the Horde." Catra must be thinking 'Ok so at what point did you become the authority on whether someone is good or bad, Adora?' Adora has shown no interest in understanding Catra's position, she treated her as an enemy without fail since she left her, literally in every single case including at Princess Prom when Catra was trying so hard to romance her. And Catra doesn't accept Adora's naive black and white view of the world. Think about it: when Adora defects she begins treating all Horde with hostility, including her dearest friend, she judges them all and doesn’t even try to see them as the complicated people that they are. So when she suggests Catra doesn't belong with the Horde, Catra looks back at her, feeling totally isolated from Adora. Even though Adora's plea is earnest, Catra declines it.

>As the next memory begins, we see Adora now has both hands on Catra's arm, she's desperately trying to hold on to her bond with Catra and show her desire to fix things between them. Catra doesn't drop her wary demeanor at all, and Adora looks lost and anxious over this as a young Catra runs by.

The memory starts out full of childhood innocence as the two of them play together. When the girls see that the Black Garnet chamber is open, young Adora remarks "we're definitely not allowed in there." Young Catra looks at Adora, seemingly asking if she wants to go in, trusting her. Young Adora runs off, and Catra follows her in. Yes, Catra participates in the decision, but she's not the one who runs towards the chamber, and that's important to what happens next.

A worried (adult) Adora looks to her friend who seems so distant, stoic. Anxiously, Adora tells Catra "You don't have to go in there." Adora knows what happens next is very bad, that this is a hurtful memory for Catra. As an unwavering Catra begins to walk towards the chamber, Adora looks down at Catra's hand. [pic above] She wants desperately to reach out and take it, to hold Catra back from this terrible moment, to tell her she's sorry for messing up. Adora knows now that she screwed up, that she's let Catra down, somehow more than she ever realized. She doesn't know what to do about it… she follows Catra inside.

The young girls explore, Catra touches the black garnet and gets shocked. Adora has second thoughts, she realizes they're trespassing.. but of course, SW returns, so they try to hide. As SW takes off the mask, Adora cries out, taken aback... young Catra looks at her in dismay. She's about to pay for Adora's mistake with a lifetime of suffering. Offended, SW tells them to "Get out!" but rethinks. She puts the mask back on, and decides to use this moment to instead abuse the girls and use the crime of their trespass against them. As SW tells Catra to stay, Adora turns around, seeing that Catra is caught, and she's scared for her friend. She really did make a poor decision, and as a highly empathetic person, what happens to Catra scars Adora, too.

Held powerless by magic, Catra tries to explain that they were just playing. SW's words to her set the stage for a lifetime of physical and psychological abuse: SW leans over her menacingly, telling her "Insolent child, I've come to expect such disgraceful behavior from you, but I will not allow you to drag Adora down as well." Again, it's not Catra who decided to go in, so it's really not her fault. SW disparages her and heaps blame upon her for Adora's bad choice, ignoring the truth.

Adora weakly tries to protect Catra, saying "SW, it wasn't her fault. It was my idea too." It's an understandable response, as they're just little kids. Still, Adora could have taken the blame for their trespass, since she led Catra inside. But it's about to get a lot more hurtful for Catra...

SW's voice echoes through Catra's head as she trembles in terror: "You have never been anything more than a nuisance to me. I've kept you around this long because Adora was fond of you but if you ever do anything to jeopardize her future, I will dispose of you myself. Do you understand ?" Catra trembles in fear, her eyes unfocused, the room empty but for SW menacing her. She's in a dissociative state, terrified and helpless. I think some people probably feel like this must have been a idle threat, but it isn't: SW abuses Catra many times after this for her mistakes. And the depiction of the dissociative state helps us understand just how damaging it was. While Adora seemingly goes on to not realize the importance of this memory, for Catra it is formative to her entire life.

Again, Adora tries weakly to stop what's happening, putting herself between them. She tells SW "please, stop" then looks over at Catra, full of concern. Running over to SW, she tells her "she didn't mean to". This is so hurtful, as young Catra is very smart. Catra knows Adora has blown it again, after all, what is it that she "didn't mean to" do when it was Adora's idea to trespass? Adora isn't getting the magnitude of the situation, and Catra is very much left to fend for herself.

SW then does a very insidious thing to Adora, a very directed abuse that's meant to work against her personality and empathetic reactions to others pain. She tells her "Adora, you must do a better job of keeping her under control. Do not let something like this happen again..." SW follows this up with years of manipulation to make Adora even more susceptible to abuse. But in this moment, SW again heaps the blame for Adora's mistake onto Catra, who did nothing wrong. For Catra, she comes to believe that what she did doesn't even matter, nobody cares what the truth was. Even Adora. But for Adora, the hurt goes deep as well. She made a bad decision, her friend gets hurt for it, and she never comes clean... instead, she's told she has to do a better job of controlling her friend, and that she has to be perfect so that it doesn't happen again. It's a deep and hurtful moment for Adora, just like it is for Catra. But the hurt is much less direct, and more sneaky. Nonetheless, Adora struggles with this moment, this abuse of her, in the most intimate and painful ways all throughout the series.

Young Catra watches on as SW completes her manipulation of Adora. For Catra, she's left with the feeling that nothing she does matters, she was blamed for something she didn't even do. And Adora seemingly took the easy out, spreading the blame. But she doesn't realize this moment is so insidious for Adora, that it attacks and manipulates her at her emotional need to help others. From this moment on, Adora is afflicted with a desperate fear that she can't protect others, and must lead perfectly so they don't get hurt. This internal conflict erodes Adora's self worth, and causes her great emotional pain throughout the series. Catra, instead, believes she is being told she has no worth, and isn't even allowed to make her own decisions. It's hurtful, and it's part of why she tensed so badly at Adora for trying to tell her what to do earlier. We see this realization cross young Catra's face: she feels forgotten in this moment.

We see the young girls walking away from SW's chamber, Adora with her hand around Catra's shoulder. This comfort is not enough... Catra really needed Adora to stand up for her there, to come clean, and she didn't. Trying to comfort her now seems hollow. As they flash to their present selves, Catra knocks Adora's arm aside in frustration, accusing her of needing to play the hero.

Adora responds, saying she was only trying to protect her. Catra's next words tell the real truth of their childhood: "You never protected me! Not in any way that would put you on SW's bad side!" Adora at first chafes at this statement, feeling like she did try to protect her, then crosses over to confusion at the strength of Catra's assertion. Catra is telling Adora she was blind to her pain. She wasn't there for her, and this is very much at the core of Catra's disappointment with Adora: the fact that she never stayed, never tried to understand. Adora let SW control her, make her ambitious, and so Catra was put to the side of that, and over time Adora grew apart from her. Catra’s exact words here are important: she says that Adora ‘plays’ at being the hero, yet always seemingly protected her status as the favorite, never standing up to SW and risking harm onto herself in order to save Catra from pain.

And so, the fact that out of seemingly out of nowhere, Adora decides to risk everything and defect in order to fight for people she doesn't even know, insults Catra. Adora abandons and consequently fights against her own people, leaving Catra behind, unilaterally treating her as an enemy. Never, in their whole lives, did Adora ever fight for Catra, only offering affection afterwards to make up for the cruelties that happened to Catra. So no, Catra doesn't want Adora to save her, or her sympathy, when she seemingly cared so little about her pain. Adora was no hero to her.

Now an obvious question might be: if the manipulation is that Adora is supposed to protect and control Catra, then shouldn't she have had to see SW abuse Catra for it to work? The first part of the answer is that it was never really about that, once the idea was put in Adora’s head, SW used it to manipulate her further into a mentality where Adora would accept praise, promotion on her path to becoming a force captain.

The other is that when someone is being hurt like Catra was in that moment... if the one person in the world who is supposed to get it doesn't get it... then it becomes very hard to ever bring it up to them again. It's a specific type of hurt and abandonment: for Catra, she goes on to believe that this is her burden, that somehow she alone is supposed to learn these hard lessons. And so she doesn't tell Adora about the abuse. Also, keep in mind that they are small children, and Catra doesn't want Adora to hurt like she does... so she's actually protecting her, in her mind. But the fact that time goes by and Adora never seemed to care, to stop and see Catra's pain, was very hurtful to her. And Catra’s feelings of betrayal at Adora’s not seeing the hurt are justified: in episode 1, we see Adora watch SW menace Catra, then happily run off to accept her promotion, only remembering to check on Catra as an afterthought. Catra needed Adora's support, and never really got it.

Promise

[pic caption: (left to right) Adora’s apparent willful ignorance of the abuse.]

So Catra believes she learns these hard lessons so Adora won't have to, but is left alone in her pain. This also means that SW specifically abused Catra at times and in places so Adora wouldn't be aware, which again, tells us it was never really about making Adora responsible for Catra's decisions. No, the reasons were much darker, and Catra bore it all alone.

The girls flash to their younger selves, and Catra accuses Adora: "Admit it, you love being her favorite." Catra is telling Adora that she was disappointed and hurt that Adora kept accepting praise and privilege from SW, after that moment when she so clearly should have seen how SW abused her, and the maliciousness of the death threat. In Catra’s mind, Adora could have rejected SW. As painful as it is for a small child to be without any parents, it would have been the right thing to do, for Catra. SW was no good to Catra, and they could have shared the pain of being orphans who only had each other, but instead Catra ended up bearing all of the abuse while Adora was given privilege.

Adora denies this assertion, and yet she did accept the privilege SW offered her. Catra's next words show how ignorant Adora was to the realities of their lives as they flash back to their present selves: "Oh yeah? When you left, who do you think took the fall for you? Who was protecting me then ?" Catra bore all the abuse and punishment for Adora's leaving, and Adora wasn't there to see it. Catra did this bravely for Adora, in fact, up until before Princesse Prom, Catra did everything she could to cover for Adora, just like she asked, protecting her, hoping she'd come back to her. But Adora shows no understanding at all for what Catra went through, she didn't even think about what must have been happening to her. Adora has never taken the time to think about how her actions affect Catra's life.

Adora counters, suggesting that Catra could leave the Horde, and therefore get away from SW's abuse. Catra just glares back at her, disappointed. Catra knows running from the abuse won't solve anything.

::What this comes down to is a totally different understanding of the world. For Adora, she thinks she became a hero for leaving the Horde, and becoming She-ra. She doesn't realize she was lucky to fall into the situation she did, with Bow and Glimmer helping her gain acceptance and protecting her. She's totally unaware that the reality that her becoming She-ra is a manipulation born out of evil intent. For Catra, she's always known that the world is harsh, and that bad people exist who will try to destroy you. She's not afraid to fight, she's had no choice learning these harsh truths. It's a jaded view that negatively affects her perceptions of people, but it prepares her for the worst, and so she relies on it. So when Adora suggests she run from it, she rejects her as naive. They flash back to their younger selves after Adora suggests Catra can leave like she did, and Catra accusingly points out that she doesn't need to follow Adora around. That they're children is relevant to the previous memory where Adora led Catra into danger, and then didn't protect her. Catra isn't interested in following Adora blindly after she's put her in danger so badly in the past.

Flashing back present selves, Catra tells Adora she doesn't want to leave. As she says this her face conveys her anger at the world, her drive to face SW instead of flee. She says "I'm not afraid of SW anymore, and I'm a better force captain than you ever would have been." Let's take this in parts: Catra won't run from her abuser, she's already planning to take her down. Doing so is important to Catra, as it fixes her world in an important way. And that Adora can't see this just shows how far apart they are now. In Catra's mind, Adora was supposed to stay, and as they rose to power together, they would have supplanted SW, fixing Catra's world. The two of them would have been stronger in the end. But Adora did leave, so Catra impatiently tries to get Adora to see that she won't just run away. If Adora doesn't want to help Catra overcome this evil, then she'll do it on her own.

Her disappointment in Adora for abandoning this fight is apparent, what comes to mind is when Catra calls Adora weak in the Sea Gate episode. And now Catra knows she's got the power to do this, she's a force captain, and if she can just find a reason to depose SW she knows she has the station and fighting ability to take her down. She always knew she could lead, but was happy to let Adora have success because she really didn't want that responsibility. So she points out her superiority, not to show that she's better than Adora, but to tell Adora she was blind to Catra's worth, and to be hurtful to Adora for abandoning her.

They flash back to their child selves: Adora looks at Catra, hurt and confused "You always said you didn't care about things like that." Adora is feeling hurt by the idea that she was unknowingly taking advantage of Catra, because Catra has seemily just told her she was lying.

Now, this next part is important, and it's important that we are seeing Catra's reaction as her child self: Catra looks sad and lonely as Adora finishes her question, and she's crying. Something adult Catra would never let herself do. So we're seeing a much more authentic expression of Catra's hurt and emotions than if it were her present self. What you need to understand here is that those emotions don't really match her words... Catra tells her "Well I was lying, obviously!" But her face says she's angry and hurt at Adora for not seeing her pain.

As she delivers those words her face is full of accusation and insult, she's being dramatic, something we will see Catra do time and time again. She stares down Adora, eyes scrunched up, showing Adora how betrayed she felt by her insensitivity. Then we get sadness, disappointment. Finally, we get a lonely kind of furious sorrow: all that time feeling alone and Adora didn't bother to understand is written on her face.

Promise

The tears are still flowing, but as she turns away they shift back to their present selves. Adult Catra looks totally alone, heartbroken.

Ok but how we REALLY know Catra isn't telling the truth is this: almost word for word, this moment exists in episode 1. ANY time you see that happen in this show, you need to look back to find the meaning of it.

>We will need to look in totality of this scene in episode 1: An excited Catra pounces on Adora, asking her what SW said. She sees the badge and takes it. Here's a funny thing, because we see Catra jump on Adora you might think Catra is always like this, she just comes into Adora's space as she pleases. But once Catra has the badge, we see no anger or jealousy. Just total wonder. She shows nothing but exuberation and happiness for Adora's promotion (pic 1, lower left fyi).

Catra knew this could be the turning point she's been waiting for, that Adora was due for promotion. And so she's jumping all over Adora, full of joy. We only see her attitude change once Adora tells her SW isn't letting her go on missions. And so, we can infer a lot of information from this...

Catra expected this moment to change their lives for the better. That Adora's rising in rank means freedom, the beginning of something new. Some many new things, in Catra's case. But Catra definitively shows us in this scene that she doesn't desire the success for herself. She only shows happiness for Adora, for them together, and she's ecstatic. (pic 1, fyi)

This, in Catra's mind, probably means the start of their romantic lives. If Adora is the force captain that brings them to victory, SW won't be able to just trample all over their lives. Catra can begin letting down some walls, maybe even let Adora pursue her romantically. If they're together, and Adora is on her side because of that, she becomes safe from her abuser. It's a much better outcome than trying to fight SW, but that's not how the story goes. No, Adora leaves her instead. How's that for emotional whiplash? All of these truths are laid bare in s3ep5, when we see Catra's perfect reality, when she and Adora are together romantically. Catra only wants to be safe and to be loved, but when Adora leaves her she loses trust in the goodness of Adora, and in people in general.

> Adora tells Catra she shouldn't be surprised she's been cut of of the mission because she's so rude to SW, to which Catra responds by calling Adora a people pleaser, then storming off in anger...

::Note, as this is important: Adora is taking SW’s side, and not Catra’s, which is entirely opposite of their early childhood memory of Octavia. It shows how Adora had started listening to the negative judgements others placed on Catra...

>Adora goes after Catra, finding her sulking on the roof. Catra is angry, betrayed by the world, at the injustice that SW is in her life. Adora asks "I didn't even think you wanted to be a force captain?" Catra tossed the badge at her, saying she doesn't. Then she folds her body up, holding herself. Adora sees this, but doesn't touch her. She's being careful to respect Catra's boundaries. But the anger Catra feels here isn't about being denied the chance to be a force captain, it's at all the hurt that SW has dealt her and continues to do so. And Adora doesn't see that, which disappoints Catra. But, she's unable to verbalize it herself, she is too insecure in her emotional vulnerability, so she lets it slide.

What we have here is two different instances of the same question with two different answers, but in both cases Catra is telling the truth. In episode 1, it's the truth that she doesn't care about being a force captain because of her love for Adora, and the promise, in her mind, that they will eventually be together. In episode 11, Catra then says she lied, and this now is also true: Catra did think about what she was going through, all the pain and sacrifices she made for Adora, which were done in the name of love. But Adora doesn't love her the way that Catra loves Adora, instead leaving her behind. And so now that Adora didn't ever see how excellent a person Catra actually was, how dedicated to her she is, and the pain she was willing to bear for her sake, it does matter. Because that's shitty of her, and so now Catra will survive on her own by her own excellence, her strength that Adora never stopped to see. So Catra is guilting Adora, trying to make her see how blind and unfeeling she is.

>Back to ep11: Catra tries to walk away from Adora, who desperately chases her, trying to understand why Catra is becoming so distant, wanting her to tell her what's wrong. She reaches out for Catra's shoulder in one last attempt to get Catra to talk, she knows touching Catra could maybe get her to be more open. But the truth is Adora has been far too easy on Catra, she needs to be more forceful if she wants Catra to talk, which she later comes to understand... she's been coddling Catra, and so Catra is allowed to wallow in her unhealthy mental states.

Catra takes Adora's hand, forcefully holding it away from her and delivering a hurtful line: "Why do you think I gave the sword back to you in the fright zone? I didn't WANT you to come back, Adora!" This hits Adora like a load of bricks, her dismay is evident. And it's all true, which is the sad part. Catra was already preparing to cut ties with Adora, as even by that point she had come to a realization, a decision: if Adora doesn't want to be with her, then she'll do it herself. She will do the hard things on her own.

She turns away from Adora, looking hurt and betrayed. And Adora is at a complete loss, she doesn't know this side of Catra, this part of her that has survived hardship all these years... she lets her leave, not knowing what to do.

Adora is then attacked by the security, which takes up her time. As that happens, we see memories only shown to Catra. Catra runs, emotionally overwhelmed as all the unfair judgements, the abuse, and hollow apologies ring out around her. All the years of frustration and sadness weigh on her, she tries to keep it together, lashing out at the holograms. She falls to her knees, fighting back emotion and trying not to cry, her inner, vulnerable self is near the surface, and she's trying not to break down in tears over all of the hurt she's had to bear...

… and then she hears soft crying...

She turns to see her younger, tiny self, crying. Then, a tiny Adora joins the tiny Catra. Unlike the other memories, Catra never flashes into her younger self, she just watches...

The tiny Adora pulls the blanket down, Catra hisses at her... Adora sits down next to her tenderly. And we finally get the promise, the two parts that Adora has so tragically broke...

Adora tells her "It doesn't matter what they do to us, you know? You look out for me, and I look out for you... nothing really bad can happen as long as we have each other." The tiny Catra looks at Adora, wanting to trust her, to believe in her. As she says the question, present Catra echos it: "You promise ?" This was a sacred moment that gave Catra hope as a young orphan, that maybe she would be ok.

And so, the present Catra echoes it. Adora tells her she promises, as the skeptical present Catra looks on. Tiny Catra is still sad, insecure... she hugs Adora, needing this. Adora suggests they go back out to play... and we see tiny Catra look at her, still afraid, reluctant, wanting to stay. But she decides to trust Adora, and so they walk out, holding hands. Then something unique happens. Tiny Catra stops to look up at her present self: note, this is entirely a unique moment in the simulation, it never happened in reality... and yet Catra is given this moment...

The innocent child stares up Catra, making her see her. It's a look full of meaning, it doesn't carry any specific emotion... only innocence. Catra is having an inner child moment. That most deep and innocent part of her, her vulnerable self who feels love, is communicating with her. It's asking her to see it's vulnerability, and it's pain. Catra sees this, all of the pain Adora has caused her, the breaking of the promise, the promise that this innocent part of her was holding on to desperately with hope. She is forced to acknowledge Adora's disloyalty to her, her carelessness. Catra is reflecting on how she did her absolute best to keep that promise, even after Adora failed to look out for her in SW's chamber. Catra was so loyal and so good to Adora all of their lives; she made sure Adora had a good life, and she played by SW's rules so Adora could be the chosen one, wanting to protect her. All in the hope that they would be together, and that their love was real. But Adora couldn't even do that much, she left her. And Adora doesn't understand her, she doesn't even seem to miss her.

Promise

[pic 9: Broken Promises, Catra’s inner child, The Hero goes Her Own Way].

Present Catra watches her tiny self leave, coming to the tough realization: that she's never been able to trust Adora, not really. Her love isn't reciprocated, not by her standards.

…. which makes Adora a deeply unsafe person to Catra...

Catra survived SW's abuse, learning to believe in herself, protect herself because no one else would. All while keeping this hope of love in her heart, this vulnerable core of herself that has tenderness and loves Adora, and needs love back. But, her need for love goes to such a deep vulnerability that giving in to it and then again being rejected or forgotten by Adora would simply destroy her. SW held the threat of death over Catra’s head her entire life, and Catra resisted it, got through it by being tough and trusting in herself. So now she sees she can't trust Adora: everything that happened since she left her behind, the fact that Adora always treats her as an enemy, that she seems to show no lingering desire for her, and doesn't even seem to miss her while replacing her with new friends, seems to confirm her worst fears. Fears that have been building over the years, starting when Adora broke their promise in SW's chamber, and then as Adora pursued her success while accepting praise and privilege from SW, ignoring the abuse Catra bore because of it. She decides she can't trust Adora. Love is a lie, a weakness. A weakness that could destroy her last bit of individuality, and belief in the world.

And so, Catra, The Survivor, makes the decision... in her mind it's the brave one, just like way back when and she decided to bravely stand up to SW's abuse and not let it destroy her: she will stand up to the threat that is the weakness of her love for Adora. Adora is selfish, she doesn't deserve Catra's love. She was stupid to believe that love was even possible, for someone like her… who has always been ignored, and told she is unworthy of praise or even existence. There's only one thing left for her to do: she will be alone, strong on her own, for herself.

Her gaze hardens... that part of her that has made sure she survived SW's abuse, and made sure she won fights when she was threatened, is now the decider. It will protect her from her vulnerability, and reject Adora for her. I suppose you might be confused as to what I'm referring, or maybe not... If you haven't had to fight for your life, whether physically, mentally, or otherwise, you might not know this side of yourself well. But we all have it, it's The Survivor. And while I knew mine would protect me, I didn't accept it as my real self, I didn't accept its necessary but vicious deeds as my own. This is very much how Catra is, and as the series goes on she puts this survivor in charge of more and more decisions, we watch her deteriorate as this part of her gets out of control, protecting her from darkness with more darkness. All the while her vulnerable inner self suffers, watching the horrible deeds and becoming more and more alone, desperate for affection.

>Adora is outnumbered, eventually ending up hanging from the cliff's edge by spider webs. She hears Catra return, dealing with the spiders. Adora looks up, hopeful because Catra has returned...

Catra saunters in. Let me say a few things before we go through this part: Catra is about to say a lot of things that aren't really true. They are instead meant to be hurtful to Adora, Catra is being intentionally mean. We shouldn't take her exact words as her authentic beliefs, because they're not... no, Catra is doing what she believes she has to so she can be apart for Adora, and be safe from her. The truth is, Catra needs to be away from Adora. She's too scared of the vulnerability that is her love for Adora, because Adora hasn't shown her that she cares. And she can't do that by defecting, no, she must stay with the Horde. It's the only thing she feels there is left for her to do.

Now, let's go through this: and heads up: I'm getting at something very powerful that's going on here that you may not have realized. This speech is, in fact, a heroic moment. A heroic moment... for Catra. Not Adora, for Catra. And you just need to open your ears to hear it...

"Hey Adora."

🎶 is sad

"Catra! Help me, please!"

"This thing wouldn't work for me if I tried, would it? It only works for you... then again, you're special... that's what Shadow Weaver always said..."

🎶 is melancholy

"Catra, what are you doing??"

"Ah, ya know, it all makes sense now... you've always been the one holding me back... you wanted me to think I needed you, you wanted me to feel weak."

🎶 has even tone

"Every hero needs a sidekick, right?"

"Catra that's not how it was.."

🎶 rises, falls, sad (“Promise” begins playing)

*Catra chuckles* "The sad thing is I've spent all this time hoping you'd come back to the Horde... when really you leaving was the best thing that EVER happened to me..."

🎶 lowers, is dark, is dramatic. -Note: we see Catra seemingly become deranged as she says this line. This is Catra deceiving herself out of perceived necessity.

"I am so much stronger than anyone... ever... thought." *she cuts part of the web*

🎶 begins to rise, uplifting

"I wonder what I could have been if I'd gotten rid of you sooner." *she cuts the rest of the web, Adora falls, catching herself*

🎶 rises, is dramatic

"I'm sorry! I never meant to make you feel like you were second best. Please, don't do this."

🎶 is still rising, uplifting

*Catra stands proudly, nobly, looking at the sword. She looks down at Adora, then she casually tosses the sword past her...

🎶 is rising, hopeful, heroic.

"Bye Adora, I really am going to miss you..."

🎶 is heroic, violins now playing, adding depth

*Catra turns and walks away from Adora, proudly*

🎶 has risen to its height, crests, is heroic.

"Catra... Catra, no!!"

🎶 remains high, cresting, heroic

*Adora cries, sad, confused by Catra's leaving her...*

🎶 crests again, fades out...

Ok, so... let's talk about what just happened here. The undeniable conclusion is that this was meant to be a heroic moment, and a damn heroic moment... for Catra. The writers are telling us that Catra leaving is an important part of her hero’s journey, and that it was the right thing to do. You might be wondering, how can that be? The short answer is, Catra is on a hero’s journey unlike all the other hero’s journeys normally portrayed in fiction. All of it, even her darkest deeds, all her cruelty towards Adora, will be part of a very... important... and powerful... journey. One which will forge her into a hero in this series, in her own incredible right... how this is, what she is, is yet to be revealed... but make no mistake, she's a hero. Just not the one you expect…

We see Adora open her eyes, and see Light Hope. She tells Adora to let go. She means of her emotional attachments, as we find out. Adora cries for her lost Catra, that she couldn't bring her back to her. She lets go...

BIG ASSERTION TIME: Now, I know it's a common theory that these memories were all just an elaborate manipulation by Light Hope to divide the girls from each other, but I don't agree with that. No, I believe this was a memory journey guided by Catra, subconsciously, to help her tell Adora why she couldn't come with her, why she has to be apart.

Take for instance the memories and visions that Adora sees when she's on her way to the Heart of Etheria in season 5: this system exists apart from Light Hope, who dies at the end for season 4. This simulation comes from somewhere more primal: in my belief, it is the deep magic of Etheria being visualized through the First One's tech. We see the simulation show Catra the promise memory, something Adora isn't shown at all, and then allows her to see her inner child's hurt. Something deeper is going on here, and you should consider how strongly the magic of Etheria is resonating with Catra when it does. Because the magic of Etheria will again speak directly to Catra, this isn't the last time... In short, the magic helps the two of them to understand each other, because Catra is an important part of Adora's true She-ra journey.

I also believe that a theme of this series is that abusers, like L. Hope, are not perfect vindictive manipulators. They are flawed, and L. Hope in particular, I believe, is no genius: she fails time and time again. That L. Hope uses the moment to get Adora to let go is her using the moment to her advantage, she didn't play ultimate control over it. She just piggy backed on Catra's hurt to do it. So that last memory really was for Catra... Furthermore, I simply cannot believe L.Hope would understand the concept of the inner child… as she can't even understand sarcasm.

But now, because of this, Adora now knows of Catra's pain... and this is the beginning of Adora's long journey back to Catra, of her repairing their bond…

Let's address the obvious counterpoint: Adora now knows that Catra is hurt, but she doesn't yet understand why. And it's not really her fault, as Catra doesn't know how to talk about her feelings, among other things. But it's apparent that Adora doesn't remember these crucial memories as well as Catra does, even though they were critical in her development as well. Adora is a mess of emotions, just like Catra, and (if) she has ADHD, it might be one reason why she doesn't really get Catra. Especially if her parental figure has been manipulating it against her. Adora very much vibrates between stimuli anxiously, so SW might have made her forgetful by distraction over time. Also, the way in which Adora treats Catra as an enemy when she doesn't accept Adora’s (totally rushed, afterthought, and hollow) ultimatum that she defect with her, is a reflection of Adora's ingrained Horde war training… this is something she has to unlearn, as it is wrong. But Adora is a good person, she really, truely, is, because Adora never stops trying to make it better. And so, she slowly, but surely, comes to understand Catra’s trauma.

We get one last scene of Catra returning to the fright zone. We get to see Catra's truth here: She walks, as if she's not even there, she's deadened by the sorrow and the inevitability of what her life will now be: one of hard work, and zero joy. She will try her best to stand on her own, and put Adora out of her heart, slamming its doors shut against love. It doesn't work, but that's what she's trying to do, nonetheless. This is the beginning of a profound depression that builds over the next 3 seasons, and combined with new traumas, nearly takes her life.

But the tech Catra has brought back will end up giving her what she needs to face down and depose SW, just like she needed...

::Here is another complicated twist that's so essential to She-ra as a series: Catra, in fact, protects Adora by taking down SW. Catra may go on to command the Hordes forces so effectively that it pushes the Princess alliance harder than it's ever been pushed before, but her deposing SW is extremely important in the story. She both removes SW’s ability to attack Adora, and then denies her any sorcerous power by taking the Black Garnet from her, since SW needs an external source to draw power from in order to use her vampiric powers...

Ok so more theory time: it's a common belief that Catra stays with the Horde, and goes on to try to conquer the world out of some deep need to externally validate herself, and to prove she was the better child by beating Adora. I don't think any of these explanations are true. Catra may go on to play such a character on a surface level, but every time she professes to have any such ambitions, she is either in the presence of Adora, or under incredible stress. In the one case, she's saying those things to try to hurt Adora, and make her see how naive and foolish Adora always was, especially now that Adora thinks she can fight against her.

In the other case, it's actually her survivor mechanism trying to take over, to make her world safe. In every case where Catra says something about ambition, somewhere in that scene, Catra shows the distinct emotions of her true inner self: generally, these emotions are sorrow, fear, and loneliness. They don't exist on screen long, they are what is known as micro expressions. (See below for a short discussion of Catra’s micro expressions.)

To put it simply, the only reason Catra stays with the Horde is so she has somewhere she can be separate from her feelings and heartbreak over Adora, and then she climbs the ranks in order to find safety, first from SW, and then Hordak, once he threatens her life with his temper tantrums. That she fights against Adora is just a collateral consequence, she isn't out to get Adora, but nor does she care if Adora gets hurt, because she’s hurt her. Catra does fight against the princesses, though (including She-ra).

A core feature of Catra's character is indeed one of personal power. She's a person who is told to hurry up and die at an early age, but refused to do so. So her arc, her issue, isn't a cautionary tale about chasing validation, it's about her overcoming her fear of vulnerability and allowing herself to rely on others in a way that lets her be safe without needing to combat the darkness with more darkness. But vulnerability scares her because of the abuse she experienced.

As for validation, the only person she would want that from is Adora. This is because Catra believes in herself already: that she has a sacred right to exist, no matter what SW and others may tell her (note: Adora struggles with this, she's actually the one who seeks validation). But, she also needs love, and she is too fearful that Adora doesn't really love her and is afraid of being hurt by that. It's also why I think she's so chaotic towards Adora: her inner child tells her adult self to protect her from her love for Adora, which it tries to do, but that same child misses and needs Adora in so many ways. So she's trying to be mean to compensate for the incredible desire she feels towards Adora. I love it when Adora calls her a brat in season 5, it's such a well deserved line, mmhhmmm.

Actual discussions of how these particulars play out in the show are better left for another time, but there you have it.

Promise sidebar discussions: Catra’s micro expressions; Catra nearly dies at the Battle of Bright Moon

“White Out” microexpression discussion: [see pics below] This is the first time since the Battle of Bright Moon that Catra and Adora meet. So it's a good time to talk about Catra’s micro expressions. Picture 1: Adora says “Hey, Catra” out of the blue and Catra is completely blindsided, she figured she wouldn't be bothered out in the middle of nowhere. She's anxious and unhappy to be seeing Adora. Along with her suspicious absence the episode before in “Roll With It”, the answer is obvious: Catra has been avoiding Adora. She may have cut ties with her in “Promise”, nearly bested her at the Battle of BM, but she doesn't want to see her. She doesn't know what she feels about her.

Picture 2: Enraged monsters are decimating the base, and a battle breaks out over the corrupted disc. Catra is desperately trying to protect it, because she can control Adora if she has it... and she needs this chance to have her back. As Catra reaches to pick it up, she's facing away from everyone and so no one can see her desperation and sadness from missing Adora. (pic 2) Shortly after, we also see her clutch the disc desperately to her chest in a way that's very endearing, right before the monster attacks her and makes her drop it. Then, as she's about to die in its jaws because she doesn't want to give Adora up again, Scorpia breaks the disc and saves her life. We see in this episode as Catra completely loses track of her emotions, and now realizes she has to come to terms with the fact that she's so desperately sad from missing Adora, she was willing to die just for a chance to have her back.

Pic 3: Catra hates working for the Horde. She HATES it. She gets zero joy from the job, and she’s already figured out that Hordak will kill her if she screws up too badly. She didn't want this job, plain and simple, but now feels stuck with it. None of this is the life she wanted. Combining this knowledge against Catra’s declaration to Adora at the end of Promise, we know she's not happy that she had to go her own way...

Promise

Catra’s near death experience at the Battle of Bright Moon

At the Battle of Bright Moon, Catra leads Adora (She-ra) away. They battle, but then Catra retreats and instead starts listing out every single worst fear of failure she thinks Adora has. It's a dark moment, she's acting much like SW did to them as children, and we watch her manipulation take root in Adora. Finally, her words are too much, and as Catra looks down at Adora's (She-ra's) back, we see Adora become deranged, overcome with her fear of failing everyone... (pic1, above) she picks up a boulder and throws it directly at Catra. Catra is knocked flying, and only by the barest of margins does she keep from falling to her death. Adora nearly kills Catra. And so, as Adora drags Catra up from the cliff and slams her into the wall, we see a totally heartbroken and emotionally crushed Catra. In this moment, Catra believes all of her worst fears are confirmed: Adora only cares about being She-ra, so much so that Adora would kill her in the name of being that hero. Catra uses this moment, this belief, to justify her division from Adora. Sadly, she's wrong... she's ignoring the seriousness of the threat that the battle poses, and as Adora was facing away from her during that moment, she doesn't see the terror and desperation Adora experiences due to her cruel words…

Oh, and one more thing before we go: when Catra says “What, did you really think this was about you ?” SPOILER ALERT: It was. Because She-ra is one big Catradora story… and we love it.

As always, thanks for reading. <3

~EtheriaDearie

P.S. :: as I am new to tumblr, if you enjoyed reading this, please consider giving me a reblogg! Thanks!! 🙇💛


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4 years ago

How Corrupted Catra knows ALL of the Princesses dirty little secrets..(and so does Catra)

How Corrupted Catra Knows ALL Of The Princesses Dirty Little Secrets..(and So Does Catra)

Corrupted Catra is one of the most visually stunning sequences in She-ra. Her look is iconic, her anger has been seared into our minds... it's as though everything about her is just... pure... magic.

That's right, because Corrupted Catra is magic. She's Catra, and yet she's more... She has magical knowledge and power. Supernatural powers, you might say.

This makes her Catra... extra. Because Corrupted Catra... knows all.

That she knows all is made immediately clear::

She accuses Adora of being a portal baby, something Catra simply did not know at the time (explanations below) and then goes on to suggest that Adora is fantastically guilty of all that has happened. And the sneaky truth is that Corrupted Catra is exactly right: Adora really is the source of all that has happened. Because Adora... is She-ra...

How Corrupted Catra Knows ALL Of The Princesses Dirty Little Secrets..(and So Does Catra)

Explanations can wait a bit, but the fact that Corrupted Catra knows Adora's She-ra history means Corrupted Catra is unique, different, than Catra herself. And this is what makes her so important. Once we hold this insight while considering all of Corrupted Catra's words, together, in relation to each other and to the story, it becomes clear that Corrupted Catra is talking to Adora about the totality of the She-ra story, even parts of Adora's own story she herself hasn't yet uncovered, and also weren't even revealed to us, the viewers, by the end of season 3. And Catra, too, has this knowledge, because Corrupted Catra is magic.

Now, the goal of this post is to establish theory, unlike my other posts which could be described as character studies. The intent here is to lay out how Corrupted Catra is unique, and because of it, she has importance to Catra’s arc as well as the story's overall arc. Understanding Corrupted Catra is important to further character analysis of Catra post portal episodes, hence the discussion. This certainly isn't the last you’ll hear of this, so for now, I hope you enjoy!! 📝

To start, we'll look at what is proven that Corrupted Catra knows, then we'll discuss how the butterfly effect is part of Adora's story, and finally I'll share a possible origin story for Corrupted Catra.

Let's get right to it ~

So here are Corrupted Catra's words, along with their simplified meanings: (*extended explanations to follow)

"It's always the same with you Adora. I have to do this, or-r we have to do that. Let's be honest: all of this... is your fault."

::This is Corrupted Catra's thesis, her divine message intended for Adora… and for Catra. Corrupted Catra is, in fact, revealing that Adora has caused a butterfly effect.

"If you hadn't gotten captured, your sword wouldn't have opened the portal."

::Adora was incredibly naive when she accepted the sword, she was foolish to give in to Light Hope's false narrative that she was destined to be a hero... Consequentially, Adora is now caught up in a dangerous sequence of events, for which she is woefully unprepared.

“If you hadn't found the sword, and been the world’s worst She-ra, none of this would have happened.”

::This statement is actually having to do with Adora's own fears: that she will fail at being She-ra, that she's been failing in her duty, and is about Adora's recent revalations that she is, like Mara, caught up in a dark First Ones plot.

“Admit it: the world would still be standing if you'd never come through that portal in the first place."

::Catra knows that Adora is a portal baby, that she's a First One, and that she's being used as their weapon. Also, once Adora was portaled into Despondos, becoming She-ra was inevitable.

“You… made me this! You took… everything from me!”

::The abuse Catra suffered by Shadow Weaver's hand was because of Adora being She-ra, which SW must have figured out back when they were only children. Young Catra loved Adora, which SW hated because it threatened her plan to sacrifice Adora for power, and so SW tried to break Catra's spirit.

“You broke the world… and it is all… your… fault.”

::Everything that’s happened… even what is yet to happen, including the activation of the portal by Catra... is part of a chain reaction of events which started when Adora was pulled through the portal as an infant: Adora's existence changed the timeline of Etheria, and is the origin of all of the conflict that's occurring… in the past, the present, and even the future. Because Adora was pulled through the portal to make her She-ra, the conflict which Mara put on hold by sacrificing herself has been restarted, with various forces now scrambling for control over She-ra.

… And Corrupted Catra knows ALL of this, including possible implications for the future. She therefore knows about the super weapon.. and likely it's intended use. (*explanations to follow)

Now, let's go over the proof that Catra does indeed know what she knows, as it is revealed within the story:

Firstly: Catra knows what Corrupted Catra knew because everyone retained their full memories of the portal dimension, as proven by Lonnie, Kyle, and Rogelio:

How Corrupted Catra Knows ALL Of The Princesses Dirty Little Secrets..(and So Does Catra)

Next, Catra's emotions and reactions immediately after she returns to reality further confirm she remembers being Corrupted Catra, including Adora punching her out:

But most importantly... Catra's knowledge is confirmed later on in season 5 through Horde Prime:

How Corrupted Catra Knows ALL Of The Princesses Dirty Little Secrets..(and So Does Catra)

Notice the similarities of how Adora reacts to Corrupted Catra's accusal, and then to Horde Prime's: she's as surprised as we are about their knowledge... (in pic1, Horde Prime calls Adora a First One, in pic2 Corrupted Catra tells Adora she's a bad She-ra >>because she's a First One)

Horde Prime might have been able to predict that Adora was a First One because of his past lives, but as their conversation continues it proves he knows her story. This is because Horde Prime didn't know Adora's She-ra story until Catra is chipped, as before this, he was still playing Glimmer and Catra against each other in order to gain information.

How Corrupted Catra Knows ALL Of The Princesses Dirty Little Secrets..(and So Does Catra)

His chipping Catra is the how of his 'I see all, I know all', and that he gains such intimate knowledge about Adora, we then know Catra knew all of Adora's She-ra history. But since Catra never interacted with Adora in any way during season 4 where she would have learned Adora's She-ra story, Catra must have learned it somewhere we're not shown. Except, that we were... she knows it because of Corrupted Catra...

Also consider that he's telling Adora all this as he stands next to Catra, with his hand on her shoulder. Creepy in the least, it indicates where he gained this knowledge. Furthermore, the way he taunts Adora shows he has an outdated knowledge of She-ra, just like Catra would have had. He doesn't know that Adora broke the sword, and will instead tap into her primal She-ra powers as the true champion of Etheria...

Lastly, that surprising bit: Catra knows about the super weapon, as confirmed by what she says as well as her actions at the end of season 4 and beginning of season 5:

How Corrupted Catra Knows ALL Of The Princesses Dirty Little Secrets..(and So Does Catra)

Catra knows- she isn't bluffing when she tells Horde Prime she can help him understand the weapon. This is because she already knows how it works. During her time as Corrupted Catra, she must have been given the big picture of everything to do with the First Ones and She-ra: and so she knows She-ra and the princesses are part of this weapon...

Ok, but Corrupted Catra doesn't talk about the weapon directly, right? What she says is vague, so how can we know? Well, because that part of the story was yet to be revealed: her omission was necessary from a storytelling perspective... and yet, later evidence indicates that Catra knew all along.

That's the basics of the theory, for now let's call it the Corrupted Catra theory: It is that Catra gained inside knowledge, by way of Etheria's magic, through Corrupted Catra, during the conclusion of season 3, having to do with the First Ones corruption of Etheria and of She-ra... and Catra knows all of this, even as Adora is yet to uncover the dark plots and manipulations herself, during season 4.

The implications of Catra knowing all of this is complicated, and as this isn't a character study, I won't get into them. But to briefly explain: Catra doesn't understand all of it immediately... she processes what she learned in a way that's very similar or even mirrors how she's processing her emotions and trauma throughout seasons 4 and 5. That Catra is so emotionally confused post portal contributes to her understanding of things also being confused, and so it takes her time to really understand the total implications of all that she knows...

But, I degress...

Hey, thanks so much for reading this far!! To let you know, what's up next is a descriptive readalong of Corrupted Catra's conversation with Adora, and how it's all one BIG discussion about the butterfly effect. If you want more information, feel free to keep reading… if not, you've got the gist of it. Thanks again!

Also, a bonus level: a possible origin story as to how Catra comes to be Corrupted Catra...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We take up the story in s3ep6... just as Corrupted Catra is going to encounter Adora... (obligatory CW: despair/death-)

::Adora kneels, crying... Bow and Glimmer have just faded away… they've given Adora all the love they could, telling her that they believe in her... and so Adora cries... fearful at the magnitude of what she now faces: a universe collapsing in on itself, a world she helped create through her careless treatment of her friendship with Catra. Despite Bow and Glimmer's encouragement, Adora is still fearful that she won't overcome, to be able to fix things. As we see later when she meets Angella at the sword, even then, Adora is still convinced she must pay for her mistakes with her life.

But Catra is about to return... her beautiful, lovesome friend, who before throwing herself into the fires of the collapsing reality, finally told Adora why it hurt her so deeply that Adora didn't stay. Not with words, but instead with an authentic display of emotional need and vulnerability that Adora could see and begin to understand. And yet Catra, in the end, rejected her, not willing to say those words, to confess her love to Adora... instead lashing out and cruely throwing Adora to the side. Catra was unable to overcome her hurt and fear of abandonment in that moment… seemingly choosing death instead... not willing to trust in Adora to fix their love…

And so... Catra returns... her voice corrupted, her features being consumed by darkness. She is Corrupted Catra, and she is the personification of Catra's anger and disappointment at Adora for breaking her heart. And yet, so very much more... she is a being of divine purpose, created by Etheria’s deep magic, who is meant to challenge Adora's entire world view... and make both girls see Adora in a new light…

>Adora is thrown back by Corrupted Catra, snapping to the bar in the Crimson Waste. It's not a place the two of them met, no, this place is meaningful to Catra. It is the point of Catra's deepest low after Hordak ‘kills’ her, rending her down to her very soul... and is the place of her epic speech about losing it all, being unwanted and persecuted.

Corrupted Catra straddles Adora, deep flirtation in her voice. Her desire is evident, Adora is a thing she wants but lashes out at, viciously protecting herself from her feelings of love for Adora...

She coos at Adora, asking her where her friends are, reminding her of the fact that Adora left her forsaken, and that the people which Catra believes don't care for her as much as Catra cared for Adora before she broke their promise, are gone... it's just the two of them now. She finally has Adora alone... and so she lashes out, wanting Adora to see her pain...

Adora dodges it, pulling Catra close, looking her in her eyes, trying to explain again the seriousness of the danger they face...

Catra pushes at her face, rejecting her plea: "It's always the same with you Adora. I have to do this, or-r we have to do that." Catra pulls her up by the hair, Adora at her mercy. "Let's be honest: all of this... is your fault." Adora looks at Catra, confused and yet... deeply ashamed...

What we are witnessing is an incredibly perceptive take down of Adora as a person. One that isn't really fair to her, but is based in the undeniable truths Corrupted Catra knows about Adora, knowledge that is entirely beyond what the present Catra knew, and reflects hard truths about the nature of their relationship that the present Catra had only seen glimpses of...

::Let's pause here to take a quick aside regarding the season 2 and 3 story arc~~

::In case there's any confusion: both of the portal episodes are about Adora's broken promise to Catra. That's what they represent in the narrative of the story: that once Catra decides she should separate herself from Adora at the end of "Promise", bad, traumatic things happen to Catra. Catra thought she could be strong on her own, strong for herself, without needing the Promise which Adora broke, but the universe, fate, whatever... doesn't let her, and she gets hurt very badly.

First by Shadow Weaver's manipulation and abandonment, then by Hordak handing her a death sentence because she tried to trust SW, and finally when SW reappeared in the fright zone, channeling Glimmer's power and nearly killing Catra yet again. She's reeling from a cruel world which keeps trying to kill her, while also feeling a deep sadness of loneliness in her heart from missing Adora which saps her will to live. And Adora knows that she's let Catra down... that something has gone very wrong with Catra, leaving her frightened for her friend... she is just beginning to understand the consequences of her having left Catra.

How Corrupted Catra Knows ALL Of The Princesses Dirty Little Secrets..(and So Does Catra)

[pic cation: Catra as Hordak suffocates her, Catra feeling powerless to SW's abuse, Adora's realization]

The portal happening is a reflection of this broken promise: Adora isn't there, and so she can't look out for Catra… and really terrible things happen to Catra after Adora left her brokenhearted. And so, Catra pulls the switch, in desperation to change her life, no matter the cost, and also heartbrokenly sad and wanting to die from all of her loneliness and pain. She's in a terrible state, and Adora needs to see this, to understand the truth of her heartbreak, because they were once all that each other ever had...

Right from that moment when Adora tells Catra that Shadow Weaver is in Bright Moon, Adora sees the change in Catra... something broke inside Catra then, and now Adora must try to recover her friend, and the universe, before it all falls apart from her betrayal of Catra... all that is happening... is because of that broken promise, and the seemingly unending hurt that her friend is feeling...

>>>Again, all of this is important, as its part of the butterfly effect we have yet to discuss. Hopefully that all made sense... let me know if you'd like to see a s2-s3 summary along these lines. For now, moving on.<<

>Back to Corrupted Catra, who is holding Adora at her mercy...

Corrupted Catra has just accused Adora of being the source of all the misery that has occurred, and she is right. But it's a narrow minded view which ignores the bigger truths, and it's horribly unfair to Adora. We'll explain this more as we go along.

>Adora is thrown, landing at the scene of the ice base where they had their second fight.

"If you hadn't gotten captured, your sword wouldn't have opened the portal."

I'll just say this: when Catra comes after Adora in the Crimson Waste, she is uninhibited, whereas before she was fighting with a code (ie, fighting She-ra 1vs1), this time she didn't. As she says post dying to Hordak "It doesn't matter what I do, I don't get to win". Catra beats Adora so fast because she's done playing by rules, and she's done with the rules because of the trauma that happened after Adora left her. In that moment when Catra captures Adora, all of Adora’s shortcomings as She-ra and as a friend to Catra caught up to her.

>C.Catra brings Adora low, throws snow in her face, pins her to the guard rail... "If you hadn't gotten the sword and been the world's worst She-ra, none of this would have happened."

We see Adora's face show intense shame and internal realization at the mention of her failure as She-ra. Something interesting is happening: this judgement of Adora being She-ra isn't Catra's, although she probably doesn't think Adora is very good at being She-ra. These are the very doubts and fears Adora herself has been struggling with: about being the new She-ra, and needing to meet Light Hope's austere expectations of her, of her inability to understand Mara's 'failure', of her recent revelations about Mara's sacrifice to stop the weapon and what this means for her as the next She-ra. And so somehow, Corrupted Catra is intimately knowledgable of Adora’s ongoing stuggles...

How Corrupted Catra Knows ALL Of The Princesses Dirty Little Secrets..(and So Does Catra)

>Adora is thrown, landing in the ocean near Salineas where they met be soon after her defection, only to be pulled up out of the water by the hair by Corrupted Catra, who sneers at her:

"Admit it: the world would still be standing if you never came through that portal in the first place."

Ok, wait, so we know Catra probably overheard Adora complain about being taken from her family, but at no point does she say she came through a portal. Could this have been general knowledge from their childhood? No. We know for certain that Adora has no knowledge of being a portal baby (s3ep1). Shadow Weaver took in baby Adora with the intention of using her for her own gain, likely predicting she was She-ra. For that reason alone SW would have made sure that Adora coming through the portal wasn't common knowledge, and as 2nd in command, SW had the influence to do it. Furthermore, when Adora attempts to confront Hordak on taking her from her family by opening the portal, he sneers at it, saying she's of so little consequence that he doesn't even remember her. Once again, Corrupted Catra shows us that she knows far too much, is too perceptive of Adora even when we take into consideration how intelligent Catra is.

>Adora is thrown again, snapping to Princess Prom. Now C.Catra says something VERY interesting, full of furious hurt and sorrow: "You... made me this!" Adora tries to run, is caught: "You took... everything from me!" This statement she’s making isn't some darkly warped manifestation of C.Catra's anger, no… it's the actual truth.

And so Catra’s object of desire isn't allowed to run from this, as Adora must come to understand this truth. Once again, C.Catra is saying something which shows supernatural perception: To really understand what that is, we need to understand the two other points in the story when Catra says remarkably similar things about Adora being the source of her pain…

::One is at the end of s3ep3: When captured Adora tells Catra that SW is in Bright Moon, Catra responds: "Shadow Weaver... left me... for you. All of this... happened... because of you..." There are many similarities in what she says here to what C.Catra has just said. All the pain of SW abandoning Catra to die and then Hordak 'killing' her for it, and then again when SW returns to the Fright Zone and nearly kills Catra yet again, all of that trauma happening is, in Catra's mind, because of SW abandoning her to go be with Adora.

But really, SW went to Bright Moon because Adora is She-ra and She-ra could heal her, and because SW knew she had to avoid the death sentence that Hordak was handing down to her. Yes, SW still has her goal of using Adora as a sacrifice, but the story doesn't prove out that Catra is right: SW mostly just switches prisons, and Adora gains not a whole lot from her presence other than her healing ability (which SW needed her to learn for her own benefit), knowledge of her origin as a portal baby (which SW wouldn't want to give up, but needed to), and some limited knowledge of the Horde's portal plan. But Catra, instead, only sees this as Adora receiving privilege from her abuser, again... Catra fails to see the bigger picture.

::Then, in s3ep4, Catra comes face to face with SW again: after trying to fight both her and Glimmer, Catra lies bound and at the mercy of SW, so she accuses SW: "You made me this way... and you get to be the good guy...?" And then: "You couldn't WAIT to get away from here, from me... but you came back... for Adora..." This statement is even closer to the truth, and the meaning of C.Catra's words.

Catra is blaming SW's abuse for her compromised mental state... the anger she's lashing out with in defense of herself, which has her unable to stop hurting herself and others while wanting to avenge herself against SW with no care of the collateral damage. Catra knows that somehow, Adora has always been the reason why SW hurts her... she just cannot see why. Yes, this angry vindictive person Catra is devolving into is the result of SW's abuse, but it doesn't get to the real truth of why she was abused, and ended up as this fearful, angry person who feels as though she can never trust anyone ever again...

>Back to the present: Corrupted Catra stands over her object of desire, telling Adora she is the source of all of the pain that makes her so hurtful... telling her that she took everything from her...

... And Corrupted Catra is telling the full truth of why Catra was abused as a child: it was because of SW trying to emotionally destroy Catra, when she saw that Catra's love for Adora was too strong… because SW was grooming Adora to make her weak so she could control and then sacrifice her, and SW didn't want Adora to have such a devoted source of love in Adora's life. (If you need more information, feel free to check out part 1 of my Shadow Weaver Death discussion post.)

Corrupted Catra’s choice of words are all about the real truth behind SW’s abuse, and it is now revealed that Adora really is the source of all of Catra's pain: If Adora hadn't been She-ra, Catra wouldn't have faced SW 's wrath and cruelty like she did, because SW has only ever cared about using Adora for her own selfish and depraved reasons...

... And so, when Adora then leaves Catra, breaking her promise to her, Catra stops believing that there is good in the world... her inner self panics as it's being consumed by heartbreak, and her outer, survivor self becomes more and more defensive of her own life, causing her to stoops to depraved levels like her abusers, SW and Hordak, in order to defend herself.

And ALL of this hurt originated because of Adora... in one... single... event...

> Adora is thrown again, ending up in the chair of Mara's ship, where Catra captured her, as Corrupted Catra cruelly accuses her: "You broke the world... and it is all... your... fault..."

So, let's combine these words with Corrupted Catra’s statement to Adora about her coming through the portal as being the cause of the world teetering on the edge of oblivion...

... And we a ‘beat of the butterfly's wing’ scenario. One where Catra's childhood was cruelly torn apart, as the consequence of Adora being She-ra… the events of which have lead up to the tragic creation of the collapsing portal, all because, as a child, Catra fell in love with the wrong little girl-

… A little girl... who was pulled through a portal from another dimension… to fulfill a dark purpose of wielding a super weapon capable of annihilating the First One's enemies or even the universe itself… who was then taken in by a abusive unfeeling monster in SW… who planned to weaken Adora and then corrupt She-ra, to use her for SW's own dark purpose… who then, recognizing Catra's incredible love and devotion towards her intended victim… abused and nearly destroyed Catra's spirit as punishment...

Everything bad that's happened to Catra happened as part of a series of events which began when Adora was pulled into Catra's plane of existence: Adora is the beat of the butterfly's wing which unleashed a hurricane of bad consequences, resulting in Catra being abused so cruelly...

… And that pain has continued right up to the present moment... where a emotionally lost and desperate Catra opened a portal… destabilizing reality… leaving Adora in the desperate position of trying to save reality… which will cost the life of her friend's mother… all while Adora faces down this angry, hurt, betrayed, confused, and heartbroken Catra who she left behind... hurting her so deeply.

::Now... is it personally Adora’s fault that this butterfly effect occurred? Of course not, I do not mean to suggest that!! (Also, even though it's not Adora's fault, she still accepts the burden of generational trauma and wants to help fix it..) But that's the point: Adora never had a choice in becoming She-ra, just like Catra never had a choice with the childhood trauma that happened to her. Adora played no part in SW’s decisions, and she has always tried to do the right thing all along… and Catra nee- WAIT NO jkbdbejbksjkb ahhhh ok I'm not going to get into it here! It would take too long…

👏🌺🙂 Let's shift gears instead~

In closing , I'd like to share one possible reason that Catra may have been able to become Corrupted Catra, instead of just disappearing like everyone else did... after she seemingly chose to end it all the episode before by falling into the fires of the collapsing reality:

This theory has to do with Madam Razz.

... So, when Catra falls into the light the episode before, Adora then runs, crying, and shortly finds Madame Razz, who tells her to "go back to the beginning". After her little inspirational speech to Adora, Razz then leaves Adora and purposefully walks into the burning light of the collapsing reality... only to have Corrupted Catra emerge moments later, who then tails Adora until the moment where she catches Adora and begins her monologue... Coincidence? Maybe, or maybe not...

How Corrupted Catra Knows ALL Of The Princesses Dirty Little Secrets..(and So Does Catra)

In season 4, episode 10 we see Razz lament the fact that she wasn't able to help Mara overcome and survive the nefarious plan the First Ones made for her. The episode then ends with Razz leaving the pie for Mara, in remembrance of her sacrifice... Razz's struggle with her failure to Mara is very emotionally depicted...

... But, now Razz has a chance to help Adora succeed where Mara failed. So, how does she do that, when the First Ones plan for Adora, and the unstable power of the Heart, is so insidious?

Well… how about by making sure Adora has the one person who truly loves her and who she truly loves back there to help her ? Is it therefore possible, since it is apparent that Razz can travel through the portal realities as she wishes, that she might have encountered Catra, and then sent her back on her way to Adora, as Corrupted Catra, as a way of helping to heal the divide between the two girls ?

... Because the truth is that both girls are in sore need of a new understanding of their situations:

Adora needs to understand that she has to keep fighting, because she's She-ra and there's no going back, now. Dark plots and Catra’s broken heart can't stop her, she has to succeed now, or all is lost.

And Catra must come to understand how all of her anger is wrong: that it's corrupt, and is the product of malicious peoples attacks on both her and Adora, all of their entire lives, and so her anger, and the defensiveness she feels because of it, is a mistake. Catra also needs to break free of the trauma cycle and to figure out how to help Adora succeed in saving the universe, and Corrupted Catra's knowledge helps Catra do both of these things.

So, Corrupted Catra is the push in the right direction... that both girls need, in order to stop the Heart and defeat Horde Prime…

So this is my belief as to how Catra returns as this representative of the deep magic of Etheria: Catra is not allowed to die, like she wanted, and perhaps by Madame Razz’s intervention, she returns as Corrupted Catra, who then gives both girls guidance as to where their paths must now go so they can correct things...

Anyways, so, so hard prove, and I won't call it a theory... perhaps, it'll only ever be a dream... 🕊

That's it for now. I hope you enjoyed this..!

As always, feedback is always welcome! And if you have questions, I will be happy to answer them!

Peace and Love 💫

~EtheriaDearie

P.S. :: as I am new to tumblr, if you enjoyed reading this, please consider giving me a reblogg! Thanks!! 🙇💛


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4 years ago

Shadow Weaver’s Death, Her True Abusiveness, And Her Final, Beautiful, Gift To Catra

image

::The resistance fighters stand in the failsafe chamber. Catra has just called Shadow Weaver out on her manipulation. Shadow Weaver reluctantly explains the danger of the failsafe, and then implores Adora to take it: even if she fails, SW says, she will save her friends, and the universe. As literally every other person in that room cries out against Adora taking the risk, Adora turns and says she will do it. Catra, dismayed, runs to her telling her that SW is sacrificing her, and demands to know why she’s letting her do that. Adora tells Catra “Because even if she is, it’s better than Prime getting the Heart and destroying the universe.” Catra trembles in deathly fear, her face consumed in terrible realization: if Adora does as SW wishes, she will die. Shadow Weaver is trying to kill Adora. She knows this to her very soul, because… she is Shadow Weaver… And Adora is letting it happen…

Hi there, my name is Joel, and in this segment I’ll be looking at Shadow Weaver’s death, her being a child abuser, her terrible manipulations of Catra and Adora and the monstrous pains the two girls have to conquer to save themselves from her.

The main premise I’ll be trying to explain here is that, like Horde Prime, Shadow Weaver is a villain of utmost seriousness. And, like Horde Prime, the girls will treat her as one, surpassing and defeating her once and for all. But it won’t be with violence, but instead with love, creating a beautiful story of two people transcending their trauma and hurt through coming together over their love for one another.

I feel obliged to warn readers: this post will cover child abuse, even predatation. It may be hard to read. Also warning: tl;dr, please consider at least sitting down to read this!

Finally, I know there are SW fans out there; that’s good. Shadow Weaver is, at times, cool af. But, definitively a terrible person within the plot of the show.

So, even if you’re a fan of SW, I still encourage you to read along because as we reveal her truth and the damage she deals to Catra and Adora, it makes her final moment so, so much more beautiful… and it gives entirely new meaning to her final… two… words….

Disclaimer time: Taking on Shadow Weavers death is ambitious for a first post, I know. But understanding her is crucial to understanding most of the major moments in this show. Still, I should say here that while this may seem a bit ‘head’ canon-y, I assure you my conclusions come from watching the show carefully and referencing the entirety of the rest of the show back to this one moment. I’m instead positing these as theories, and let’s just say I feel I have the data, and Data Never Lies! Please *do* ask questions or seek calcifications in the comments or Ask me anything (I’m new to Tumblr).

—-Part 1: Catra, Micah, and the Truth—-

To start this journey we will travel backwards in the series to investigate the what and why of the terrible child abuse Catra suffered growing up under SW’s care. We will be looking chiefly at the Light Spinner episode in the 2nd season. We will cover Catra’s confrontation and SW’s -supposed- explanation for her abuse, then the tale of Micah and SW’s manipulation of him, and then the terrible truth of why Catra -really- was abused.

>A terribly alone Catra asks her abusive mother why she did it. Why did she treat her so badly ?

Keep reading


Tags :
4 years ago

Shadow Weaver’s Death, Her True Abusiveness, And Her Final, Beautiful, Gift To Catra

image

::The resistance fighters stand in the failsafe chamber. Catra has just called Shadow Weaver out on her manipulation. Shadow Weaver reluctantly explains the danger of the failsafe, and then implores Adora to take it: even if she fails, SW says, she will save her friends, and the universe. As literally every other person in that room cries out against Adora taking the risk, Adora turns and says she will do it. Catra, dismayed, runs to her telling her that SW is sacrificing her, and demands to know why she’s letting her do that. Adora tells Catra “Because even if she is, it’s better than Prime getting the Heart and destroying the universe.” Catra trembles in deathly fear, her face consumed in terrible realization: if Adora does as SW wishes, she will die. Shadow Weaver is trying to kill Adora. She knows this to her very soul, because… she is Shadow Weaver… And Adora is letting it happen…

Hi there, my name is Joel, and in this segment I’ll be looking at Shadow Weaver’s death, her being a child abuser, her terrible manipulations of Catra and Adora and the monstrous pains the two girls have to conquer to save themselves from her.

The main premise I’ll be trying to explain here is that, like Horde Prime, Shadow Weaver is a villain of utmost seriousness. And, like Horde Prime, the girls will treat her as one, surpassing and defeating her once and for all. But it won’t be with violence, but instead with love, creating a beautiful story of two people transcending their trauma and hurt through coming together over their love for one another.

I feel obliged to warn readers: this post will cover child abuse, even predatation. It may be hard to read. Also warning: tl;dr, please consider at least sitting down to read this!

Finally, I know there are SW fans out there; that’s good. Shadow Weaver is, at times, cool af. But, definitively a terrible person within the plot of the show.

So, even if you’re a fan of SW, I still encourage you to read along because as we reveal her truth and the damage she deals to Catra and Adora, it makes her final moment so, so much more beautiful… and it gives entirely new meaning to her final… two… words….

Disclaimer time: Taking on Shadow Weavers death is ambitious for a first post, I know. But understanding her is crucial to understanding most of the major moments in this show. Still, I should say here that while this may seem a bit ‘head’ canon-y, I assure you my conclusions come from watching the show carefully and referencing the entirety of the rest of the show back to this one moment. I’m instead positing these as theories, and let’s just say I feel I have the data, and Data Never Lies! Please *do* ask questions or seek calcifications in the comments or Ask me anything (I’m new to Tumblr).

—-Part 1: Catra, Micah, and the Truth—-

To start this journey we will travel backwards in the series to investigate the what and why of the terrible child abuse Catra suffered growing up under SW’s care. We will be looking chiefly at the Light Spinner episode in the 2nd season. We will cover Catra’s confrontation and SW’s -supposed- explanation for her abuse, then the tale of Micah and SW’s manipulation of him, and then the terrible truth of why Catra -really- was abused.

>A terribly alone Catra asks her abusive mother why she did it. Why did she treat her so badly ?

Keep reading


Tags :
4 years ago

Shadow Weaver’s Death, Her True Abusiveness, And Her Final, Beautiful, Gift To Catra

image

::The resistance fighters stand in the failsafe chamber. Catra has just called Shadow Weaver out on her manipulation. Shadow Weaver reluctantly explains the danger of the failsafe, and then implores Adora to take it: even if she fails, SW says, she will save her friends, and the universe. As literally every other person in that room cries out against Adora taking the risk, Adora turns and says she will do it. Catra, dismayed, runs to her telling her that SW is sacrificing her, and demands to know why she’s letting her do that. Adora tells Catra “Because even if she is, it’s better than Prime getting the Heart and destroying the universe.” Catra trembles in deathly fear, her face consumed in terrible realization: if Adora does as SW wishes, she will die. Shadow Weaver is trying to kill Adora. She knows this to her very soul, because… she is Shadow Weaver… And Adora is letting it happen…

Hi there, my name is Joel, and in this segment I’ll be looking at Shadow Weaver’s death, her being a child abuser, her terrible manipulations of Catra and Adora and the monstrous pains the two girls have to conquer to save themselves from her.

The main premise I’ll be trying to explain here is that, like Horde Prime, Shadow Weaver is a villain of utmost seriousness. And, like Horde Prime, the girls will treat her as one, surpassing and defeating her once and for all. But it won’t be with violence, but instead with love, creating a beautiful story of two people transcending their trauma and hurt through coming together over their love for one another.

I feel obliged to warn readers: this post will cover child abuse, even predatation. It may be hard to read. Also warning: tl;dr, please consider at least sitting down to read this!

Finally, I know there are SW fans out there; that’s good. Shadow Weaver is, at times, cool af. But, definitively a terrible person within the plot of the show.

So, even if you’re a fan of SW, I still encourage you to read along because as we reveal her truth and the damage she deals to Catra and Adora, it makes her final moment so, so much more beautiful… and it gives entirely new meaning to her final… two… words….

Disclaimer time: Taking on Shadow Weavers death is ambitious for a first post, I know. But understanding her is crucial to understanding most of the major moments in this show. Still, I should say here that while this may seem a bit ‘head’ canon-y, I assure you my conclusions come from watching the show carefully and referencing the entirety of the rest of the show back to this one moment. I’m instead positing these as theories, and let’s just say I feel I have the data, and Data Never Lies! Please *do* ask questions or seek calcifications in the comments or Ask me anything (I’m new to Tumblr).

—-Part 1: Catra, Micah, and the Truth—-

To start this journey we will travel backwards in the series to investigate the what and why of the terrible child abuse Catra suffered growing up under SW’s care. We will be looking chiefly at the Light Spinner episode in the 2nd season. We will cover Catra’s confrontation and SW’s -supposed- explanation for her abuse, then the tale of Micah and SW’s manipulation of him, and then the terrible truth of why Catra -really- was abused.

>A terribly alone Catra asks her abusive mother why she did it. Why did she treat her so badly ?

Keep reading


Tags :
4 years ago

“Promise”

Why can’t you just… Promise ?

image

Today’s goal is an in-depth look at one of the most beautiful and breathtaking episodes of She-ra: “Promise”

Storywise, it’s incredibly important to the series, and focuses entirely on Catradora. It’s the first time since Adora left Catra behind to seek out the sword that the girls really have an opportunity to talk, and things are not going well. Both of them are royally pissed off at the other, with good reason.

For Adora, we’re gonna deflate that proud hair poof of hers a bit, as we’ll take an honest look at her as a person at this point in her life. And Catra… she’s really guarding her feelings closely, as she’s already deeply angry with Adora. But we will use the combination of Catra’s younger self in the memories they see, plus looking at other times in the series that relate to this episode, where she was less guarded, in order to understand her as a person at this time. Also: warning: tl;dr, best enjoyed while cozy with a drink..

To get started, we skip to when they end up stuck together…

After Adora takes drastic measures to ward off the security spiders by collapsing the tunnel, the girls are now stuck together, and so… they talk…

We immediately see how incredibly irritated they are with each other as Adora chides Catra for being in the Crystal Castle, since the monsters will continue to attack them as long as she’s protecting Catra… only to have Catra retort that she didn’t ask for protection. Some snippy bickering back and forth happens, then…

Adora asks: “Does Shadow Weaver know you’re here?” Very deadpan assertion from Adora. She knows Catra must be disobeying orders, she just doesn’t know why.

“I’d say Shadow Weaver has bigger problems right now”. Catra is already starting her move against SW back at the Horde. With SW abusively blocking her every move within the Horde, and now that Catra knows that SW was going to mind wipe Adora, Catra has decided she must deal with her abuser.

Adora puts on her telltale sideways grin, and Catra chafes at Adora’s flirtation, saying “I told you it’s not because I like you” downplaying Adora’s suggestion that this was the reason she let her go. Catra freely admits here that she does like Adora, but it’s not the real reason she did it. Still, Catra doesn’t explain further, and we see later that Catra often lets Adora explain away her actions this way… but that Adora constantly misses the deeper truths.

"Where are your new best friends? I thought you did everything together”. She’s very snarky and dismissive of Adora and her flirting. She’s mad about Adora leaving her for her new life.

“The ones you let SW imprison and curse?” Adora is angry at Catra for what she did, which was a sudden escalation of things by Catra.

“Yeah obviously, what other friends would I be talking about?” An obvious dig at Adora for leaving her, everything behind. She deadpans this, staring back plainly. Catra is obviously really angry at Adora… while Adora is legitimately mad at Catra for doing something so nasty to Bow and Glimmer…

::Let’s take a moment to talk about Catra’s feelings about Adora’s new friends: Catra feels horribly betrayed by this. Adora completely tossed her aside, and replaced her with Bow and Glimmer. What comes to mind is at the end of Sea Gate, Catra is thrown in the water and then looks up at Adora, who is celebrating and cuddling with Bow and Glimmer. Catra is emotionally forlorn watching this, as Scorpia comes to drag her off to safety, Adora doesn’t even look back towards her.

She’s forgotten, Adora showed no love towards her at all in that scene (and then hardly any at Princess Prom, either). Adora ignored her plea for her to return, she didn’t reach out to Catra at all. And now she watches her cuddle with her new friends: everything Catra thought she had with Adora meant nothing, and she’s been replaced with these feel goodie goods who are fawning all over Adora.

Suffice to say, Catra couldn’t do this, she’s got way too many issues with emotional intimacy and touch aversion. So she watches Adora, seeing that what she offered her wasn’t good enough, knowing because of it she’s forgotten. Catra was trying really hard to be a close friend to Adora in spite of her issues, but as we will see, Adora wasn’t trying to understand what was going on with Catra. And because of this, Catra was too afraid to express her affection openly, and yet here’s Adora… accepting all of Bow and Glimmer’s love, for which Adora really did nothing to earn. Adora took Catra’s friendship for granted while ignoring her deeper needs, as will be explained, then completely abandons her, not even seeming to miss her. Catra is deeply hurt by the unfairness of this.

>Catra stares back at Adora, frustrated when she doesn’t even acknowledge their lost friendship.

“Well, we don’t need to go together. You do your weird little magic quest thing I’ll find my own way out”. Catra looks resentfully at the sword on Adora’s back as she says this. Catra is laying down boundaries, except it’s useless since they are trapped together. But, boundaries are important to Catra and as the episode progresses, Adora shows that she doesn’t really understand Catra’s.

>As they walk along, both girls’ shadows loom equally tall. The symbolism is that in this story, both are equally important… it’s also a shockingly beautiful sequence. (pic above)

After entering the room of infinite darkness, Catra tries to separate from Adora but the door is gone, they are stuck together. Weird things start happening. As the Fright Zone appears, both of them are confused. Adora decides to suspect Catra, after all, she attacked her friends. But as Adora grabs Catra, Catra is surprised and confused… Catra doesn’t like being touched unexpectedly, Adora knows this but is ignoring that and attacking her. She gets treated as an enemy when she clearly hasn’t done anything wrong, and it sets the tone for the two of them: Adora has constantly treated Catra as an enemy since the very moment she defected, not even trying to understand Catra’s point of view. And so Catra increasingly emotionally distances herself from Adora. Catra angrily casts Adora’s arm aside, not liking being vilified by her, and Adora doesn’t understand why Catra is so upset. Catra slips away to explore, needing space from her.

image

The way Adora immediately suspects and then attacks Catra is symbolic to the whole episode: by defecting to the Rebellion, Adora chose to start treating Catra, and her entire unit, as enemies, backing it up with hostility. But Catra doesn’t really agree that the horde is evil… in her experience, it’s just how life is.

>The two girls, now separated, call out to each other. Adora hears Catra’s call, then another: young Catra is behind her, looking lost and insecure. Catra joins Adora as their first memory has just begun…

Keep reading


Tags :
4 years ago

Shadow Weaver’s Death, Her True Abusiveness, And Her Final, Beautiful, Gift To Catra

image

::The resistance fighters stand in the failsafe chamber. Catra has just called Shadow Weaver out on her manipulation. Shadow Weaver reluctantly explains the danger of the failsafe, and then implores Adora to take it: even if she fails, SW says, she will save her friends, and the universe. As literally every other person in that room cries out against Adora taking the risk, Adora turns and says she will do it. Catra, dismayed, runs to her telling her that SW is sacrificing her, and demands to know why she’s letting her do that. Adora tells Catra “Because even if she is, it’s better than Prime getting the Heart and destroying the universe.” Catra trembles in deathly fear, her face consumed in terrible realization: if Adora does as SW wishes, she will die. Shadow Weaver is trying to kill Adora. She knows this to her very soul, because… she is Shadow Weaver… And Adora is letting it happen…

Hi there, my name is Joel, and in this segment I’ll be looking at Shadow Weaver’s death, her being a child abuser, her terrible manipulations of Catra and Adora and the monstrous pains the two girls have to conquer to save themselves from her.

The main premise I’ll be trying to explain here is that, like Horde Prime, Shadow Weaver is a villain of utmost seriousness. And, like Horde Prime, the girls will treat her as one, surpassing and defeating her once and for all. But it won’t be with violence, but instead with love, creating a beautiful story of two people transcending their trauma and hurt through coming together over their love for one another.

I feel obliged to warn readers: this post will cover child abuse, even predatation (*not sexual, ie). It may be hard to read. Also warning: tl;dr, please consider at least sitting down to read this!

Finally, I know there are SW fans out there; that’s good. Shadow Weaver is, at times, cool af. But, definitively a terrible person within the plot of the show.

So, even if you’re a fan of SW, I still encourage you to read along because as we reveal her truth and the damage she deals to Catra and Adora, it makes her final moment so, so much more beautiful… and it gives entirely new meaning to her final… two… words….

Disclaimer time: Taking on Shadow Weavers death is ambitious for a first post, I know. But understanding her is crucial to understanding most of the major moments in this show. Still, I should say here that while this may seem a bit ‘head’ canon-y, I assure you my conclusions come from watching the show carefully and referencing the entirety of the rest of the show back to this one moment. I’m instead positing these as theories, and let’s just say I feel I have the data, and Data Never Lies! Please *do* ask questions or seek calcifications in the comments or Ask me anything (I’m new to Tumblr).

—-Part 1: Catra, Micah, and the Truth—-

To start this journey we will travel backwards in the series to investigate the what and why of the terrible child abuse Catra suffered growing up under SW’s care. We will be looking chiefly at the Light Spinner episode in the 2nd season. We will cover Catra’s confrontation and SW’s -supposed- explanation for her abuse, then the tale of Micah and SW’s manipulation of him, and then the terrible truth of why Catra -really- was abused.

>A terribly alone Catra asks her abusive mother why she did it. Why did she treat her so badly ?

Keep reading


Tags :
4 years ago

Hey! I just found your blog and I've gotta say, your analysis for the characters and episodes are incredible! They're so engaging and interesting to read through-- the one about the promise episode hit close to home since I identify myself a lot with Catra. Is there a list of all the analysis posts you've done for She-Ra? I'd absolutely love to read anything else you have looking more in depth into the show!!!

Hi, thank you for your kind words of encouragement!! ... And for reading my blog!!! Also, thanks for asking this question... I've been meaning to make a proper list, I just keep forgetting to do it.. 💜🤔💜🚨

Hey! I Just Found Your Blog And I've Gotta Say, Your Analysis For The Characters And Episodes Are Incredible!

Here's an impromptu list for the meantime:

Shadow Weaver's Death, Her True Abusiveness, and Her Final, Beautiful Gift to Catra (A look at Shadow Weaver as the main villain of SPOP)

Promise... Why Can't You Just... Promise? (Discussing s1e11 as an extremely important episode of SPOP)

How Corrupted Catra Knows ALL of the Princesses Dirty Little Secrets (how Catra returning as Corrupted Catra gave her deep knowledge about She-ra's past, present, and possibly, the future war with Horde Prime.

The Catradora dream theory 1 & 2: (How Catra is able to appear in Adora's dream to ask her to dance again, and to save their love):: Short: Visual Parallels:: and How the Dream is Canon Catradora Romance 💞 (quick guide)

Long: What if it's Adora's... and Catra's, Dream? (Understanding Adora and Catra's shared dream simulation as a part of their epic love story!!! ❤️🏳️‍🌈💞).

AMA- is Catradora a emotionally healthy relationship, how Adora is wrong, and her arc as a Hero of Love-

AMA- Light Hope's manipulations of Adora as part of the First Ones evil plans, and how Adora nearly kills the love of her life because of it-

Entrapta's Arc!! Wooo ✨Science ✨🧬 🧪🔬 🚀 ☺️

Catra is magic (and her violence is about everything but being violent

Endgame: She-ra's epic conclusion revisited in an emotional meta retelling that shows the show relied on no miracles, it's just that good

MEME's n' fluff: She-ra is a lesbian, Aimee is funny, Glimmer doodle1, Glimmer doddle 2,

All links are on Tumblr. Happy reading!! 😊🤞

That's about it for now, but I should have more analysis up soon!! Please feel free to keep sending me questions everyone! As always, keep it real, and Data Never Lies!!! 💜😁💜✌️

~EtheriaDearie


Tags :
4 years ago

Hello! Absolutely love your analyses! I'd spend breaks during work reading through a piece and I appreciate all the evidence (data as Entrapta would state) you use. I see many people boil Catradora down to being abusive (aimed at Catra) and it's just so hard to argue since there's so much depth to their relationship. What are your thoughts? How would you respond to someone stating so?

:: ... Reflections on the emotional healthiness of Catradora, on Adora's arc, and on SPOP as a morally complex story-

Hi, and thank you so much for this question, I know that some SPOP fans have this kind of reaction, and while I get why they feel bad, I strongly believe such a reaction was not the intended outcome. Which is my first point:

To anyone who feels this way, Hey!!! Noelle wouldn't hurt us like that, and even though we see hurtful behaviors shown in SPOP, this isn't part of suggesting that we forgive our abusers- Noelle wouldn't do that!!

SPOP is unique in that it explores trauma as seriously as it does… this show is so many different things: it's beautiful, it's fun, it's kid friendly, and it's really meaningful. I really, really believe that both Catra and Adora’s stories are meant to be a comfort to people who grew up in situations like theirs… (I, for one, find Catra’s story very comforting).

My second point is that Adora is as much a product of hurtful abuse as Catra is, and this includes that she has some very hurtful behaviors towards Catra, especially as we see the two of them together starting well before her defection. For example-

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We all know Adora is a sweetheart, and for her to even behave in hurtful ways is so against her own best nature that it's a sign that she's not really being herself. It's also very wrong in terms of her ability to be She-ra, as Etheria chose her for her ability to love- she is deep down an incredibly loving and generous person, and love is her power. Yet, when we see her with Catra in ep1, she's acting hurtful instead. This- is where their relationship becomes so complex- because Catra really isn't being hurtful, and Adora has a history...

...And, this is a much bigger problem than just her relationship with Catra, because Adora is also hurtful towards everyone in her past life, she vilifies them and fights them- never once does she make an honest attempt to help her former friends- Adora simply makes an assumption that fighting them is a necessary hurt of her 'destiny'.

Yet... this 'destiny' is a lie, and we cannot ignore how Adora's arc from s1-4 ends with her barely avoiding destroying all of Etheria... furthermore, with Horde Prime finding them all as a consequence. Despite Adora's attempts at being a hero through s1-4, it ends with her having betrayed all of her former friends for a 'destiny' which was evil all along- Light Hope never meant to make her a hero, only to use her and the rest of the princesses as a weapon. This is because Adora had followed her 'duty' and therefore failed to be her greatest good as a hero of love.

Her decision of duty and all that goes wrong results because of how Adora believes in duty before all else, including and especially love. This false belief system, where she simply fights rather than looks to help her former friends, and acts hurtfully to enact this false 'destiny', is because of how Adora was hurt by her abuser. And it makes her actions wrong- she isn't valuing love, and, she is being controlled by others, some which are evil, some which are unfair- through her false belief in duty.

This concept of duty, which is so wrong, is what Adora's entire struggles are about- this includes her hero's arc. Her perceived need to serve a false duty is the reason she justifies hurtful behavior and neglects to help her former friends, it's the reason her s1-4 arc ends in disaster with her destiny being revealed to have been false, (and that she's been manipulated for evil), and, it's the reason she's so hurtful to Catra- betraying all of their love, while failing to make any true effort to understand Catra's feelings.

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We might not like Catra's reaction, or how terribly wrong the war is, but Adora wrongly believes in putting her duty so far ahead of all else that she's failing to look deeper. Adora does break promises, and she does hurt people- she hurts everyone in her old life, not just Catra, with her hurtful and blind prioritization of duty ahead of love and all else- her belief makes her vulnerable to further manipulations. Her entire concept of duty before love makes her miss how she's hurting them, and, how she's wrong to do this... ... it results in so much pain. (-in fact, Adora ends up hurting EVERYONE with her stubborn belief in enacting a false destiny, as we'll discuss.)

So, for the purposes of this question, we need to look at Adora's behavior, and how she's wrong to be so hurtful. Catra ends up very much more wrong- that's well documented- and which we all know- but, Adora is She-ra, Catra is not, and all of Adora's actions matter so much because she is at the center of all that happens as She-ra. And, she's got to learn to value love, going against the hurtful beliefs of duty that her abuser ingrained into her psyche to control her. Even though Adora is trying to do her best, she falls short of what that actually is, and it's all because of her false belief that duty must define her. She is a hero of love, not a hero of duty or destiny- because destiny cannot power her, nor guide her. Love is what must guide Adora, because love is her real power... and as a hero of love, she cannot "leave anyone behind" who needed her help...

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Through s1-4, by acting hurtful, Adora is essentially creating a false equivalency by equating evil upon all of her former friends, in a hurtful way which all but ensures further division and misunderstanding. She-ra is supposed to be a uniter, a healer- yet Adora is making no effort to do so. Adora is such a extensive product of abuse that she doesn't even see that she's doing so, and she has to wake up to this in order to become a hero of love... so, in a word- Adora is a good example of how it's possible to want to do good, yet fall short of that by being unintentionally hurtful-

Also, in part: their division happens because when Adora leaves Catra and everyone else in her former life behind she does so having not once fought for them- like how she didn't fight for her and Catra's love against their abuser. As She-ra, Adora needs to be strong enough to fight for ALL of them, rebellion and the vulnerable people in the horde who are trapped in its abusive system alike- yet, Adora doesn't do so- instead she takes a simplified view of morality, and through it, justifies abandoning her and Catra's love and fighting against instead of helping everyone in her old life. This happens because of multiple complex factors, some dealing with her history as a being a survivor of abuse - but in reality, it's mostly because everyone around Adora also is not being their best, either... ...more later

As for Catra- her choices, while very very bad, come out of reactions to Adora's history of hurtful behaviors- her inability to trust Adora is a trauma reaction, just like Adora's, yet, that reaction comes in response to Adora's continued hurtful behaviors: Catra is trying to be apart from someone who has constantly hurt her by naively following duty while showing no effort to understand how she's hurtful or to fight for their love. Adora did this within the horde by playing favorite to Shadow Weaver, and Catra feels that Adora must be misguided, just like she was before, for leaving her- instead fighting against her so willingly and vilifying her... lumping her in with their abuser as evil.

Catra was constantly abused, and watched on as Adora played favorite to that abuser while ignoring how Catra was treated. So, Adora was betraying Catra all along, and had no awareness of it- it shows that Adora has a blind spot- something which she struggles with throughout her hero's arc: such as Light Hope using her for evil. Catra felt as though she had already lost the friend she thought she had years ago, and then Adora's continued hurtful behavior following her defection, while making no effort to save their love, is what causes Catra to feel she must part ways with Adora. By Catra's reasoning, Adora must not really love her- why else would Adora be so ready to hurt her, when she made a promise to love her? Catra doesn't think Adora is actually being a 'good' person by leaving like she does- and Adora's hurtful divisive actions confirm Catra is right- by choosing divisiveness and a false destiny while not valuing their love, Adora is indeed falling short of being the hero of love which Etheria chose her to be...

So, we can see Catra's distrust and Adora's being used by Light Hope as parallel, because Catra is right that Adora is letting people manipulate her, like she did within the horde- even if Catra is only basing this belief off of her gut feelings in s1. Adora ends up betraying her promises, and being used as a weapon by Light Hope, (and the rebellion, too) for the same reason: her belief in duty which blinds her to all else.

:: 🛑 There's also the matter of whether Adora and Catra are 'in a relationship' during the war. That's dubious- morality of the war aside, Adora divides their friendship for it, not Catra- so they aren't together anymore... And, as we'll discuss, Adora is coming up short of making the best decision by doing so. But, in regards to this question, what happens during the war between Catra and Adora should be considered separately, as apart from this time in their history, Catra was quite loving with Adora: both before, and then after, the war... and so it's important to not falsely equivalate Catra actions in this way (...again, morality of the war aside..) ....more later

We'll come back to Catra's motivations later, but here's the quick reference for the meantime- Catra doesn't do what she does out of wanting to hurt Adora, her love confession in s5 precludes that. And she also doesn't do it out of any great allegiance to the Horde- it's just all she knows, and she stays there because she's trying to be free of Adora- who is a constantly inadvertently hurtful person, as Adora had actually been betraying their love for many years. But: most importantly, Catra does what she does as part of her fight against their real abuser, whom Catra sees as the real evil in their lives. This starts as Catra taking down Shadow Weaver herself, and stays true within the meaning of her other actions through the rest of her arc as well. ...more later

All in all, this is part of how Noelle gave us a morally complex story with SPOP- it's not black and white like most stories we've seen (such as ATLA). The war, while terrible, has multiple sides to it, and with it moral grayness: The horde is wrong, yet isn't really made up of evil people. The rebellion is right to defend Etheria, but has a corrupted view of the horde where they summarily judge all horde as evil. That's an amoral belief, as we'll discuss, and it plays into Adora’s confusion over who she really must be, because their hurtful views block Adora's ability to be the hero of love she's meant to be.

... And, of course- the princesses are part of an evil super weapon, as naive enablers of a generational trauma so dark that it threatens them all... ...more later

Finally, the MAJOR PSA REGARDING ABUSIVENESS.. (and therefore this question)

Since we wish to discuss abusive relationships, we must recognize that there is indeed such a relationship at the forefront of SPOP, but it's not Catradora.

All of their bad behaviors- Catra’s isolationism and hurtfulness for self protection, and Adora’s hurtfulness in the name of false duty and vulnerability to naively trusting in false ideals set out for her by others, is because of how Shadow Weaver hurt them.

It's the real truth of Catra and Adora’s arcs, that they both act out hurtfully due to how their abuser has hurt them, and as such, they both contribute to their division, not just Catra. And, they both go through long arcs of self realization and healing to be better from how they've been hurt, to be their best selves and so they can be together again.

This journey of self realization is what allows Adora to start being a real hero in s5, and accepting Adora's flaws in her actions before then is an important part of understanding her story, because, as She-ra, everything Adora does matters- no matter how unfair what's done to her is, she's got to be her best, and she has to trust in love in order to win in the end...

That concludes the "short" explanation, but, since abusiveness is such an important issue, we'll cover some specifics it in greater detail. This- is Adora's hero's arc- her and Catra's love IS her hero's journey because she's not trusting in love by how she acts in s1-4.

So, apologies for how long this will be, but we'll be covering the following subjects as part of this discussion-

1- how and why Adora improperly continues hurtful behavior that started within the horde after she finds the sword, which Catra reacts to, and how Catra wasn't hurtful before then,

2- how Adora could have used She-ra as a liberator to help her former friends, and how the rebellion also being corrupt is why she misses it,

3- Adora's self realization of her love, and how it allows her to step past false destiny and manipulation,

4- how Adora was being a false hero during seasons 1-4 as told through Horde Prime forcing her to fight chipped Catra to save her during Save the Cat,

5- Catra’s wrongness and why she believes she's totally alone against her abusers evils,

6- how the love we see in s5 was always the truth.

Back to the topic of Adora’s hurtfulness, as we see it in ep1, that goes so deeply against her better, loving nature... (part 1)

From the moment we see Adora and Catra together in ep1, it's obvious that their relationship has already become very unhealthy-

This is almost entirely unhealthy on Adora’s side, not Catra’s, as every time Adora speaks to Catra, she does so with a tone- she's rude to her, she's hypercritical of Catra's actions, she's incredibly judgemental, and she acts as if superior to her.

Yet, Adora had become the puppet of their abuser- Shadow Weaver, making the mistake of trying to fulfill the false expectation of being perfect as she was told to do. And in doing so, her naive trust in fulfilling that duty made her an unintentional enabler of her own abuse, as well as Catra's.

So, all of Adora's judgments out of supposed superiority come out as false: she's devoted to a woman who means only to destroy them, it shows that she really didn't know what was going on with Shadow Weaver's abuse.

In contrast, when we look at Catra’s behavior, it's clear she thinks Shadow Weaver is evil. And, in terms of how she interacts with Adora, it's obvious that Catra is actually still being a very loving and supportive friend to Adora- we only see any of her negativity emerge in response to Adora’s own hurtfulness. As things stand in ep1, Catra isn't abusive, if anything, it's the opposite (although I wouldn't go that far).

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So, we can start to see that Adora has an entire history of deeply hurtful behaviors towards Catra- starting well before the moment Catra refuses to follow her, or before her decision to go to war against her following “Promise”. There was no good reason for Adora’s hurtfulness, it was done in respect to a false duty made for her by their abuser.

This false belief of superiority is another way in which we can see that Adora was failing to see the true evil that was happening as she was playing the favorite- she blindly believed that being good, as measured by an ideal set out for her by their abuser, was her only way of solving her problems.

Yet, Adora always had a choice- her assumption shows a failure of reasoning, because fulfilling that duty as she was told to never would have resulted in anyone being safe- much like her trying to fulfill Light Hope's ‘destiny’. Shadow Weaver only made Adora think that as part of her plan to use and then destroy her.

Likewise, Adora always had a choice to intrinsically value her and Catra’s love above the corrupt duty forced on her by Shadow Weaver- she could have kept the faith in their love, with Catra. Instead, Adora became hurtful towards Catra...

Adora was a bad friend- and her being as such in the name of false duties is the same reason she ends up being used as part of Light Hope’s corrupt 'destiny'. Also, being a bad friend is a canon part of Adora's hero’s struggle, (spoiler warn, LotFP) as being a bad friend can also be seen in how Adora acts towards Glimmer in s4: (as Bow says in s4ep8: "...it's hard being friends sometimes... So why am I the only one who's willing to work at it?". (In LotFP, Scorpia outright calls Adora a bad friend, and rightly so..)

In regards to Adora’s failure in choice- she and Catra weren't children anymore, and standing up to Shadow Weaver was always a possibility. She could have refused to play along in a system where Catra was made to suffer while she was given praise. And, the real kicker is: judging by how easily Catra takes down Shadow Weaver without Adora’s help, it wouldn't have even been that hard.

This shows Adora really was guilty of blind devotion to Shadow Weaver, because Catra had been prepared to step free of that abuse, probably for years. So, when Adora leaves Catra, devaluing their love and instead vilifying and falsely accusing Catra of being evil like Shadow Weaver (which is an immensely hurtful thing to do after the years of torture Catra suffered), Catra decides to step free of her abusers control, while also stepping free of Adora’s continued hurtfulness.

So, we see that Adora has a dangerous level of blindness to the deeper evils that people mean to use her for, which we can see in other places throughout her arc, such as with Light Hope’s plans for her. She can't even see how she's been corrupted.

Catra, in contrast, shows us she knew all along about their abusers' true evil: she shows her awareness by her little rebellions against a corrupt system where she was constantly being hurt. Catra refused to stay weak, and prepared to protect herself from her abuser all along. Yet, all Adora ever did was act out towards Catra for refusing to conform like she did...

Let's jump forward to when Adora finds the sword, and we can apply Adora’s naive belief in enacting duty, while being hurtful in the name of it, to that decision as well:

Adora accepts the sword, and her new ‘destiny’, with blindness and devotion- believing it to be her ‘destiny’, she willingly accepts that it comes at the price of hurting Catra as well as everyone in her old life as part of fulfilling it.

This ‘destiny’, or duty, is actually nothing but a lie made to confuse Adora by Light Hope and the First Ones- it's just a manipulation to use Adora for their evil. Believing in her 'destiny', Adora then makes no real effort to understand the darker truth behind what is really being asked of her, instead trusting in that 'destiny' and betraying everyone in her old life with her hurtfulness, instead of helping them, in service to this ‘destiny’. (...more later)

Adora in effect swaps Shadow Weaver for Light Hope, (The rebellion also uses Adora as a weapon in a hurtful way, which we'll discuss), and in doing so Adora acts hurtful to someone she loves, she agrees to hurt and therefore fail a whole group of people who deserve better from her. Adora has no right to vilify them like she does, after all, she was one of them herself. Also, her vilification shows no concept of her own hurtfulness and previous role as an enabler in that system.

Sure, Adora could complain that it wasn't her fault because she was being unfairly manipulated, yet Adora continually shows that she is vulnerable to those very same manipulations, again and again, throughout s1-4. It's all to do with her false assumption of fulfilling duty at any cost.

... and it brings Adora’s entire supposed ‘moral awakening’ into question, because while she's right to stick up for the citizens of Thaymore, her entire hurtful and superior attitude towards Catra while she does it is false: it's just like how Adora was hurtful towards Catra as part of playing her role as the favorite of their abuser within the horde. She was blind to the real evil that was occurring.

She therefore has no business being so hurtful towards Catra throughout s1, even IF she didn't know about the continued evil abuse Catra suffered because of her. All that Adora’s supposed righteousness over her ‘destiny’ actually shows is that she’s blind to what is really happening, in the past, and then again when Light Hope uses her for evil.

Also, fun fact: Adora’s supposed 'holier than thou' newfound morality isn't even her own: we know she's vulnerable to others' expectations- in this case she's accepting Glimmer’s hardline view that all people in the horde must be evil. Adora takes this closed minded viewpoint and uses it as she tries to enact her false destiny all the way through s1-4, never once making an effort to help her former friends.

All in all, Adora falls short of being a real hero by doing this. And Adora really does take things too far in her stubborn pursuit of her destiny (LotFP spoiler warn). She's so willing to hurt Catra, and all of her former friends, and is so far removed from the hero of love we see in s5 by doing so. Catra is right that Adora isn't the friend she used to have- Shadow Weaver's abuse changed Adora into something hurtful instead. (In LotFP, Adora strait up attempts to terminate Catra’s life; ...in contrast, Catra only ever tries to capture Adora...)

Catra, meanwhile, has no reason to trust Adora because of her past history as an enabler of her (their) abuse. If Adora could hurt her, while being devoted to her abuser, what reason does Adora give Catra to think that anything will be different with her sudden new devotion to the rebellion? The answer is none, and as Catra had to look out for herself to protect herself from abuse, she won't trust Adora. Meanwhile, Adora can't even make an effort to understand Catra's feelings of being hurt by her actions...

Also- at least Catra had a plan- which we know this by how she takes down Shadow Weaver to be free of her abuse. ..Nor Catra does want to just leave everyone in her old life, accepting the believe that people like her are only worthy of being vilified and condemned by the princesses- Adora's self righteous judgements just makes Catra think that Adora is being hurtful and naive. Adora, meanwhile, had no plan- and even after her 'destiny' is revealed, she's still playing into the hands of her abusers while trying to fulfill her 'destiny'. It doesn't matter if Adora doesn't mean to, she's still got to be better than letting corrupt people use her for evil. She needs to learn to not be so naive.

The best theory for the way Adora behaves- by being so hurtful while ignoring the deeper truths- is that Adora has a deeply engrained hurtful world-view due to how she was hurt by Shadow Weaver towards her purpose of using and sacrificing Adora. Because of how Adora was treated, she believes that duty always comes at a cost, and that it will be painful- it's a corrupted, painful way of seeing the world where she just assumes pain comes as part of her reality of being charged with duty.

This is false, it's just what her abusers (Light Hope, too) want her to believe, and waking up to how this corrupt concept of duty is used against her by her abusers is something that must happen for Adora to be able to move past it, so that she can start being a hero of love like she's meant to be. She cannot let naive concepts manipulate her into being hurtful, and cloud her from seeing her path of love. Adora in s1 sees none of this, only her concept of duty which is wrong- she gets wiser throughout s1-4, setting up for her heroic reveal in s5, and her true She-ra form.

So, Adora's fighting Catra and all of her former friends, instead of looking to help or understand them, is a presumption that it is a necessary cost of her duty. Upholding her 'duty' was always painful for Adora, and so she thinks hurting her former friends is 'just how it has to be', because Shadow Weaver conditioned her to expect that duty would always feel painful. Her hurtful world view assumes evil on them all, while making no attempt to do better. That's not heroic- Adora is accepting doing a lesser evil as part of 'duty', just like when Catra was allowed to suffer within the horde while she was given promotion. A real hero faces evil at it's source... Adora is being no hero of love...

Which brings us to our next topic: why Adora fails everyone in her old life, and how she could have done better to help the people trapped within the horde’s abusive system. (Part 2)

Adora’s hurtful vilification of everyone in her old life, while never finding a way to help them, really is a failure to all of them. In particular, we can see how much Lonnie feels this way, much like Catra does-

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Not finding any way to help them was always a failure of Adora as a hero, something which happens because of her trauma belief of duty before all else, and how her new allies in the rebellion wrongly influence her to believe that all horde are evil. Their corrupted, hurtful views makes Adora miss an obvious possibility:

Adora could have used She-ra as a liberator, rather than as a conqueror.

I realize that may sound like hyperbole, but there's plenty of evidence of how Adora fails her former friends, and even more about how the rebellion fails the people of the horde. ->see the following pics-

So, we need to talk about why Adora never tries to help her former friends, in order to open a path to freedom like she was offered because she was She-ra.

Even though the rebellion may have the moral high ground in this story, they still fall short of being their best with their derogatory views of the horde- it further divides themselves from what are essentially fellow native Etherians, it surrenders all further thought to what is essentially hate. One result of their flawed views is how we see its Glimmer that activates the super weapon: as she says “we’re the good guys, remember?”. Are they really being their best, though?

Glimmer and Angella have pain from the war, which gives them a corrupted view of the Horde where they summarily judge all Horde to be evil out of their pain. These are derogatory views which are based on their own personal feelings of injury, which leads to their views, as leaders, crossing over from needing to protect themselves, to enacting a unnecessarily hurtful exclusion of a group of vulnerable people who needed their help.

This isn't to say that their pain isn't real… it is, it just doesn't excuse an isolationist, closed minded view of their situation. Surrendering further thought out of emotional pain simply is never healthy, they take their feeling so far as up never show any understanding to any individuals within the horde, or to try to help them. As the leaders of free Etheria, this is a failure of their station as those leaders.

So enters our sweet Adora, who, while she does always mean well, is a lifelong product of abuse that makes her highly vulnerable to blindly going along with others' expectations of her. Afraid to fail her new allies, Adora accepts Glimmer and Angella’s ‘us versus them’ close minded view of the horde as evil as her own, she ignores her deeper knowledge of how this isn't true she has from her time as one of them. Because of it, Adora never considers how they deserve to be given the same chance to be better that she was granted because of her Princess powers.

In all of SPOP, Adora is the only person who is ever actually offered a chance to switch sides. This is a failure that happens because of the derogatory and closed minded views which predominate the rebellion's beliefs- it's no secret that they hate horde soldiers, and that no forgiveness is ever offered. It's derogatory and amoral.

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In SPOP, the Horde isn't evil in the black and white sense that most stories present their villains. They are a combination of bad, but also good: we can see that good in the stories of Catra, Scorpia, Lonnie, etc- even Hordak, the supposed leader of the evil Horde, shows he can be better and gets a redemption.

So, Adora’s intimate connections to people from her former life always demanded more understanding from her than just being crushed under She-ra’s golden boot. ... Not that anybody in the rebellion is actually interested in considering this possibility- and Adora is far too concerned at failing in her new duties as She-ra to stop and see it, and so challenge those views.

It was another missed chance to help people, rather than divide, Adora misses seeing due to her traumas- her addition to their ranks should have been a chance to change the derogatory views of the rebellion for the better, to open a real path towards freedom for people within the horde who feel trapped by its abusive system, so they can find safety from it like she did when she switched sides.

It's a way in which she could have helped her former friends, and it might even have lead to resolving the war more peacefully- losing soldiers in such a way would have weakened the Horde, possibly even seen its collapse… also, Catra would have seen that Adora was no longer giving in to a blanket derogatory view of people like her... -> ->Adora's childhood best friend helms the Horde, and yet, Adora still cannot find common ground ? (it's because of Adora's own divisive behavior towards Catra. Also, Hordak is hardly the leader of the Horde- he hides in his lab and only emerges to makes snide comments.....)

Quick aside: yes, Adora does make a few weak offers of this in s1 to Catra, but always coming after Catra had been further abused because of Adora’s actions, and always with Adora acting in her superior way that shows no understanding of how she's hurtful. It makes Catra doubt Adora’s sincerity.

As it turns out, this derogatory view of the rebellion is a much larger failure: it fails the people of the horde, but very importantly, the way their hurtful views affects Adora equals a personal failure to her.

What's really so terribly wrong with the rebellion's close minded views is that we never see any quarter offered to the horde: there's no opportunity for such people to be better- no choice given to them to step free of their abusive situation, and to prove they don't really stand for that. Not having that offer in place is an immoral act, and an abandonment of duty.

Glimmer and Angella’s presumption of evil upon all horde with no path to forgiveness in itself traps those very people in the system which forces them to act in evil ways. War is never an easy thing to solve, but presuming the enemy as evil shuts down all possible further understanding, and perpetuates the violence: as leaders of their world, Glimmer and Angella needed to do better.

And, their hurtful views are also a enormous personal failure to Adora, because it frightens Adora and leads to her continued self hurting-

Adora accepts the rebellion's close minded views that are forced on her, she throws herself into battle continuously trying to make up for her failure to be perfect. She's so afraid to fail them that she acts in compromised ways- such as looking to sacrifice herself, or hurtfully protecting her concept of 'destiny' at the cost of brutalizing her former friends in battle, never looking to help them.

It's a hurtful way to live, and Adora does it because she's so afraid to fail her new allies as a former child soldier from the Horde, and so their views hurt her- Angella and Glimmer's views that being from the horde is synonymous with evil are a personal failure to Adora, particularly from Angella: as a mother, she could have helped Adora to understand her new role as She-ra, and to help Adora understand her trauma.

Instead, Angella judges Adora and treats her like she's evil unless she fights as she's told to... even though Adora, as an orphan, never had a choice in being from the horde. This is an emotionally hurtful failure to Adora as a friend, (Glimmer) and as a mother (Angella).

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::This is also the beginning of a series of failures, one which ends with everyone being hurt, because of Adora’s betrayal of being a hero of love, in what could be considered a butterfly effect-

-> Adora takes the hurtful, close minded black and white view of morality of the rebellion, and applies it to her relationship with Catra- she ignores their intimate history and her promises, and implies that Catra must be evil like Shadow Weaver at multiple intervals following her defection. That is a failure of love, and of friendship.

Catra had been hurt her whole life, she watched as Adora turned from her as a friend to be the enabler of their abuser. She's had enough of being hurt in this way, and Adora isn't even making an effort to understand why Catra feels so hurt by her actions. So, Catra wants to be free of Adora, who hurts her.

Catra fails Adora as a friend- ending the generosity of love we see her have in ep1-2, that she kept giving despite Adora being so hurtful towards her. Catra is done with Adora’s double standards, she agrees to fight the war against them all, since Adora so seemingly wants it as part of her new life and a 'destiny' which ends up being fake, anyways.

And so, the rebellion's close minded views creates Adora’s failure to Catra, Catra goes to war against them, and so, the one enemy they simply cannot defeat is created by their own close minded views.

The rebellion fails Adora -> Adora fails Catra (plus all of her former friends) -> and in reverse, Adora fails ALL of them -> rebellion alike, by failing to make the choice of love of trying to make an effort to preserve her and Catra’s love, she turns Catra against them all with her lack of faith in their love, acting hurtfully instead. It is a failure of being the hero of love that Etheria chose her to be...

A chain reaction that starts with Glimmer and Angella’s own hurtful views ends with EVERYONE being hurt- it amplifies the war, because, Adora is at the center of all that happens, and isn't being the hero she should be... you could ever say it causes a butterfly effect...

Still, Adora had a choice to be better.

Just like she had a choice to stand up to Shadow Weaver in the horde. Just like she had a choice to not turn on everyone in her old life, judging them in such hurtful ways, while never looking to help them. And, just like she had a choice to value her and Catra’s love, and through seeing how her actions hurt their love, seen that the duty she was so blindly devoting herself to was wrongly making her hurt people that deserved better from her.

Adora in s1 has so little emotional presence to be able to see her own hurtfulness- it's due to how she was hurt- that she places her concept of duty so far ahead of love that she can't even see the value of a lifelong relationship of love she had with Catra. Why would Catra think Adora cares about her, when she so casually betrays her, infers evil upon her, implies that Catra must be like their abuser ?

If, Adora was a more emotionally present person, she would have recognized that she needed to find a better way that didn't just brutalizing everyone from her previous life. And the rebellion itself doesn't help her, they just place their unfair expectations upon her. Her trauma makes it hard for her to see why love is important- she can hardly see the bond of love that she has with Catra... so, she doesn't choose love out of false belief in duty and fails to be the hero she's meant to be.. and everyone suffers for it.

In the end, Angella and Glimmer are not in themselves blameless for creating the situation they face with Catra’s determined war against them, because as leaders of the rebellion, they had been failing the vulnerable people in the horde all along.

As the saying goes, hurt people hurt other people. It's true in life and it's true in SPOP. Mostly people hurt each other because of trauma, and in SPOP everyone's trauma adds to the sadness of the war they fight for 4 seasons, horde and rebellion alike, not just Catra... or Adora. It's not the war they needed to fight, it never was, and as such they are all mostly caught unawares when their mistakes in this way results in Horde Prime finding them- ie- the true enemy they all should have been preparing to face...

... Which, it must be acknowledged, results from Glimmer's choice of trying to use a despicable super weapon to win a war- one in which her own bad attitude hurtfully influences Adora and therefore helped to create. Her act nearly destroys them all, while exposing them to their true enemy all along.

Glimmer’s naive decision results in so much disaster that it really makes you wonder if the rebellion ever deserved to win the war with the way they conducted themselves...

I'd argue no…

Glimmer’s act, and how the princesses are caught so unaware of their true enemies- (ie, Horde Prime and the First Ones) shows them to be so naive that they likely would have inadvertently activated the Heart in time, and thus destroyed themselves, anyways.

They failed to be better, acting in way that added further trauma to the system. (..this is really a just commentary on the messiness of war in general) And, the princesses really have NO excuse for being caught unawares like they were- they don't know their own world's history- there's no real excuse for this. Especially when we see that it was possible- Shadow Weaver uncovered much of it as part of her evil plans to attain more power. (Shoutout to Bow’s dads, who made a heroic effort to understand it, while starting from scratch- 🥰)

Add to this that Glimmer’s corrupted choice to activate the heart happens much as a consequence of her listening to, you guessed it, Shadow Weaver, and we have all the proof we need that the princesses don't understand their own “hubris”.

Long story short, everyone messes up the first 4 seasons, nobody is being their best- and so, Adora has to go to great lengths and great personal risk to herself to repair all of their previous mistakes as part of her s5 arc. She does this in a very beautiful way- she does it through the power of her love- *not* out of destiny, or duty, or even sacrifice. (Part 3)

Adora was always a hero of love, love IS her power, and she should have seen it sooner. Trauma is what blocked her.

A bit of sympathy for Adora:

Even though I'm talking about how she's wrong, Adora constantly found herself unfairly forced into bad situations by others' expectations put on her, some of which are evil, others are at the least unfair and corrupted by hurt. So, she ends up making some wrong choices… yet she's She-ra, she's still got to be better than that.

And Adora shows great courage in getting free of her trauma cycle to trust in the power of love instead of duty, like she was always supposed to do. How she gets past this trauma mentality is by simply learning to reconnect to her best self- and her deepest feelings of love and generosity that she was chosen to be a hero for by Etheria.

... Nevermind the First Ones-- Adora was still chosen by Etheria, as she was as a loving child, before Shadow Weaver ever managed to hurt her and make her into something else.

And, Adora finds this truth within herself with almost no help from anyone with her best interests at heart- Angella tries her best for ~3 minutes in the portal reality, to make up for her own hurtfulness towards Adora. (..Bow and Glimmer do help her some, but are very much involved in their own concerns..) Adora is a hero, but not by destiny… love is her truth.

Now... Adora’s burden as She-ra is indeed incredibly unfair on a personal level, yet as She-ra, she's still got to be able to make the right choices to be able fix the big problems she faces, and making those choices must be guided by love, not by destiny or duty.

So it doesn't matter that she's not responsible for the First Ones original evil, for which she was innocently born into- Adora still won't quit trying to make it better, because that's who she is at heart. Love was always her guide, and her strength, that's why Etheria chose her, in late s4 into s5 Adora begins listening to her love.

So, Adora’s hurtfulness with Catra from s1-4 is just the most obvious symptom of how she's struggling with a trauma mindset that blocks her from being the true hero she's meant to be. This means that Adora and Catra's relationship issues and separation was always the real story of Adora's hero's arc, because Adora failed to look deeper and save their love because to her flawed concept of duty.

Being that hero requires not surrendering her reason to false judgements which require her to be hurtful to people who deserved her love and understanding, never mind if Catra makes everything worse with her own hurtful reactions. Adora always needed to be better than that, and being so isn't easy, but she learns to do it. Again, Catra isn't She-ra: Adora is.

::So, SPOP is one big story about people learning to not let their shitty attitudes control them, and of getting past them in order to become better people. Adora had a bad attitude in s1: it made everything worse, she turned on her former friends because of it. Catra’s attitude might be the worst of them all, but they all learn to be better- Glimmer, Angella, Mermista… the list goes on. Everyone needed to be better, and in s5 they are- it's what gives them the power to overcome Horde Prime together.

... Adora rescuing Catra is such an important part of her hero’s arc because of how she is a hero of love, but it's also important because she's making up for her previous mistakes of making hurtful and false judgements against her former friends... and against Catra. We also see Adora’s true powers emerge as she saves Catra, because she's trusting in love...

Speaking of Save the Cat… (part 4)

Still, if you're at all doubting that Adora struggles with being a false hero from s1-4, it's all well confirmed as Adora faces Horde Prime during Save the Cat in order to save Catra…

When Adora shows up to save Catra, and to save their love, Horde Prime pits chipped Catra against Adora, making her play out their entire history of hurting each other for false reasons in order for her to save Catra. This is meant to be a sly and forceful character assasination by Prime of Adora as a false hero, and as a bad friend. He wants Adora to feel weak, that her failures as a hero are so total, and her lack of love so hurtful, that it's much too late for her to fix her mistakes.

Because of his belief, he really isn't expecting Adora to succeed… yet, he doesn't know that Adora has found her truth of love…

He starts out by calling Adora a false hero, rubs it in that she's a First One, part of an evil empire that he easily defeated. And as she battles against chipped Catra, he tells her “you will destroy the ones you love in the process.”

This is supposed to be a scathing rebuke of Adora’s actions through s4. One where Adora, and the princesses at large, played into the hands of the First Ones manipulations, where she willingly hurt Catra in the name of her false destiny.

He reminds Adora of all of her failures, and how as a First One she's from an evil race of beings, she's totally at his mercy, just like the She-ra’s before her. He throws Catra at her, tauntingly, asking her to kill Catra, like she tried to do before in the service of Glimmer and Angella's corrupt expectations that she deliver them from the horde at any cost to herself.

Moments before Glimmer destroys the server, and Adora and Catra get their chance to talk, Prime rubs it in just how much Catra had to suffer for her sacrifice to protect Adora- “she was scared in the end, and she suffered”. A cruelty Catra shouldn't have had to experience, but for Adora’s long standing history of betraying her for false duty.

Adora tells Catra she's not giving up on her, something she did through the first 4 seasons of SPOP with her blind righteousness towards Catra, never stopping to consider how she herself might have been wrong, instead stubbornly trying to enact her false destiny.

Prime compels Adora- it's too late, the damage is done, he's all but assured to win. She is behind enemy lines, and weak.. “then you are a fool, you cannot stop Horde Prime… he will reign triumphant… it is destiny”.

Her and Catra finally get to talk to each other when the server is destroyed, and as Catra reaches out, nearly taking Adora’s hand to go home again, he steals it away and taunts Adora one more time: “some creatures are destined only for destruction”- like it always was… Catra was meant to fail from the beginning, to die. And Adora was the tool of her abusers, she threw Catra aside as part of their evil plan to make her fail for their corrupt purposes. He sends Catra plummeting to her near death..

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Clutching Catra’s dying body to her chest, Prime tells Adora “it did not have to be like this”. He's telling Adora that it never had to be like this, all of her betrayals of Catra, her struggles in vain against her false destiny, were done in naive blindness and only ever made things worse.

Everyone was made to suffer because of her naive belief in that 'destiny', she's failed, and if she's lucky, perhaps Prime might save Catra. By submitting to his will, maybe she can spare Catra her death... or if not... perhaps Adora can at least forget her mistakes like Catra has been made to do…

We all know what happens next. Adora is not the naive girl who played by the rules of her abusers, she's stronger within herself and knows she cannot abandon love. As she says: "you miscalculated”.

And luckily for her, Catra, a true fighter for her own life, surviving against a lifetime of death threats and near death experiences, is able to hang on just long for Adora to be able to save her from the brink of death..

None of this makes Catra’s actions during the war ok, but keep in mind that Catra shows great remorse for all of her mistakes. She's learned her lessons, too… and her remorse and then total confession of love hints that Catra never did what she did as part of wanting to hurt Adora..

Still… what really makes Catra fight Adora like she does? After all… she had a choice, too, just like Adora did... (part 5)

Catra could have chosen to sympathize with Adora's views at the battle of Thaymore, after all, Adora was clearly right that what was happening to the civilians was wrong, yet she didn't.

As it so turns out, Catra isn't very impressed by some suffering of people who have lived their whole lives more privileged than she has, not when every day of her life had been a crime- surviving against abuse and torture with nowhere to run or anyone to turn to, Adora included.

Her life was that of an orphan, singled out for total destruction by their abuser, and as an orphan, the only way Catra knew for sure she could get free of that was through her own actions. She can't rely on anyone liking her or helping her because of innate magical powers like Adora does.

So, putting her life in the hands of the people who have only ever seen her as an enemy makes no sense, she's been hurt too many times before, including by Adora herself, to take Adora’s word for it.

But, she at least hoped that Adora could have chosen her out of love. Adora's willingness to abandon Catra so totally, and then continuing to behave so hurtfully in all of their further meetings, seems to tell another story.

All of Catra’s anger, and her worst actions through s4 can be summed up in one thing, of which never had to do with her wanting to hurt Adora:

Catra believes that she is totally alone in the world against her abuser, that nobody else properly sees Shadow Weaver's evil or will deal with it. And so it's up to her to do what must be done.

Everyone around her is an enabler in some way: Hordak didn't care to take a role in the Horde's everyday, only cared about results. Glimmer and the princesses become the worst kind of enablers of Shadow Weaver from s3 onward by taking her in, giving her total freedom in all but name. (And then there's the matter of Glimmer letting Shadow Weaver channel her power in s3ep4, which she uses to nearly take Catra’s life yet again...)

But the saddest example is how she thinks Adora is a naive enabler who will never learn any better. Catra feels that way because of Adora's hurtful behaviors towards her, and how Adora couldn't even choose Catra out of love, instead vilifying her and hurting her as part of her false belief in duty.

She's wrong about this- Adora sees Shadow Weaver’s evil, too, she just doesn't know what to do about it. Adora had hoped that leaving her old life behind would free her from Shadow Weaver's corrupt influence over her, and yet... we see Adora struggle with how she was hurt right up until the end. Still, if she had just had one decent talk with Catra, it could have cleared up so much hurt between them so much sooner. (but they never did...)

Adora, as we see her in ep1, is a person that is so incredibly naive that Catra doesn't even need to feel that Adora ever intentionally enabled- Adora's blind devotion to Shadow Weaver's plan, followed by total willingness to abandon their fight against their abuser, while instead assuming evil upon Catra while hurtfully lumping Catra in with said abuser, means, as far as Catra could tell, that Adora was never going to choose to help her at all.

Adora’s behavior in the horde was so atrociously bad, that her continued hurtfulness after leaving seems to confirm Catra’s worst fears: that Adora really didn't care about her, and only cared about her duty.

If true, Adora having had no plan to help her would have made Adora's continued naive enabling of Shadow Weaver a clear and present danger to Catra's life. Was playing the favorite to their abuser really Adora's only plan? Would she have just continued to enable Shadow Weaver right up until she pulled off whatever deceitful plan she had for the two of them, killing Catra, or them both? It sure would seem so.

Add to this the fact that Adora just ends up having enabled a different evil manipulator as part of her deserting her, 💖💖💖and Catra is done expecting anyone to ever help her with the realities of her abuser. If the princesses want to call her evil, while sheltering her abuser and further enabling Shadow Weaver’s evil, she won't feel bad if they all get hurt along the way.

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Catra does a lot of dangerous and hurtful things in the name of this belief. But, this is a trauma state Catra learns to wake up from, because she's lost just like Adora is, and her trauma mentality is destructive to everyone around her.

It leaves her with nothing… no slice of happiness, nobody to call her a friend, a life of absolute loneliness with nothing to live for except her drive to punish her abuser at any cost, with little to no chance of forgiveness for her violence. She learns every lesson the hard way- that no matter how much your abusers continued existence hurts you, there's simply some things you just do not do… you're no good to anyone if you surrender your heart to that kind of anger.

Catra does show deep remorse for all of her worst actions. And, she's lucky that Adora saves her. (even if she's a bit pissed at Adora for risking herself like that… 🥺😥)

But, in regards to whether she's abusive… in s5 we don't see that. Catra does act out a little bit while coming to terms with why Adora saved her- she didn't think she would ever get a second chance. From that moment onward we only see love and devotion from Catra, she doesn't want to live in her hurtful ways anymore, even if she still has no idea how to feel safe with her abuser running wild. She can't keep living like she was, so living to help Adora makes much more sense.

My final appeal to people who have a hard time accepting Catradora… (part 6)

:: We should all strive to not let our personal hurt block us from appreciating people, and understanding them. I know it may seem like I'm targeting Adora harshly, but that's why I went to such lengths to show how her issues play out in the narrative. Adora struggles to be her best self, like Catra does, and that she does doesn't mean we should love her any less than we already do!

Adora is absolutely precious, as is Catra… they never should have been hurt like they were- Adora as the ‘hero’ and Catra as singled out for destruction because of how she loved Adora.

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They were always sweet girls, like the innocent and loving children we see them as in their earliest memories, before that day when Shadow Weaver hurt them so badly.

The beautiful love we see in s5 is what they always deserved- they should have been allowed to grow up with innocence and then fallen in love, but instead they got hurt because of the corrupt intentions of others.

They both spend the arc of the series trying to get past how they've been hurt, to get back to each other. And how they do that is by remembering the way they loved each other before Shadow Weaver was ever able to hurt them and drive them apart.

That, was always their truth, their love is good and pure like it is in those childhood memories. They were always supposed to love each other, and their division was a mistake that happens out of how Shadow Weaver and others have hurt them.

Both of them show tremendous courage in working hard to be able to step past how trauma controls them to be better, it's not just Catra who has to do this.

Adora does, too, because she's got to trust in love, not duty or destiny or sacrifice to be incredibly strong in the way she needs to be to face the really scary things she has to do- such as stopping the Heart, and solving a millennia old war that was never her fault, plus more. Love was always what makes Adora strong enough to do the very hard things which she has to do.

When Catra is given a second chance in s5, she sees that Adora is being hurt, and how nobody really helps her… they just expect her to do whatever has to be done. And that's wrong, because it’s unfair and it hurts her. Catra knows Adora has been hurt all of her life, she just didn't realize how much...

Catra may have been made to suffer for Adora, but she survived that, and so she can be free of it. And Catra realizes she can help Adora, really really help her, to do the very hard things that are expected of her… Catra puts everything she has into helping Adora in s5. It's what Catra always thought she'd do, as the wiser child that knew how evil the world really was. She just got all mixed up inside, fearing that Adora would never really love her… and that was wrong of her.

Catra isn't really expecting redemption.. or even for Adora to return her feelings of romantic love back to her in the same way that she feels. But, all she has left is her love for Adora, and so she gives everything she has to her.

I think that's really courageous of her, and when she sees Adora is failing in the Heart chamber, she makes a dazzling series of romantic moves during the dream and the kiss- to show Adora that she's loved, that she's wanted, and that she's not alone. Brave, romantic moves which Catra didn't know for certain that Adora would reciprocate, but... she was still willing to do it, she loved her too much to let Adora fail, and die, while feeling so scared and alone. So, Catra does everything she can think of to let Adora know that she's loved. Catra deserves some credit for that.

We see that it works, as Adora has always loved her, too. Adora was just too blocked from expressing her love by her trauma. And Adora’s final test, as a hero of love, is quite simply to accept that she can be loved, not as a hero, but for who she is...

... I don't know what else to say to anyone who can't accept their love, or at least I won't here. I think it is the most beautiful love story I have ever seen.

In large part this is because it's not simplified. Catra and Adora’s love isn't assumed to be kismet, they have to work hard to be together. They are both really bad communicators, and had to learn to talk to each other. This is true in most relationships, and in doing so they become truly loving partners to each other.

... So, it might have been nice if there had been enough time for Noelle to give us even one more kiss between them... but, I think Noelle wanted to tell us a very mature, grown up story about overcoming adversity to embrace love. And I think that's really commendable of them.

Sorry that took so long… Anyways, Catradora is the best ship, I don't make the rules! 😅🚢 ✨ I realize I won't be able to convince everyone, but that kiss was beautiful, was it not?? So, I hope my words aren't a total loss, and that maybe I can convince just a few people to feel like I do.

Love is power. 💞🏳️‍🌈☺️

:: Hi!! - I will gladly answer anyone's questions, and feel free to let me know what you thought of this. Thank you. (hopefully I didn't just become lost in my writing halfway through somewhere ?? 😅😬 -let me know if I did...)

Also, if you've read this far, thank you for that- if you enjoyed it please consider giving it a ✨reblogg✨ or a like!! *humble thanks 🙇*

Peace and Love,

~EtheriaDearie 🕊

Some final notes:

Yes, I do realize these are fictional characters, but it's easier to talk about them this way- they are the nuanced creations of very creative people, meant for us to enjoy… in that way they might as well be real, because they have so much to teach us-

-all hyperlinks are on tumblr. Here's a list of my other analyses-

LotFP = Legend of the Fire Princess. It's canon, important, a lot of fun, and worth checking out!! 10/10 😉

-note: I will never use the term 'toxic' because of how I feel the word carries cultural connotations which detract from discussion. However, discuss as you wish! I have no issue with the word or the concept, I just seek to be very clear in my meanings-

Finally, here's a link to a YouTube video of Adora saying Catra's name (fast forward to 0:40). You can really hear how her tone changes through time... https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=f_WRT3D3n_I


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