Werq - Tumblr Posts
Lab picture day! #ilovemyjob #goscience #ucsfmissionbay #limlab #photography #werq #bowtiesarecool #picturethis #sanfrancisco (at Genentech Hall)
Brad was about to take a selfie when he realized he was on lunch. Oh gosh. Was it WORK or WERK? Brad didn’t know.
Until Chris’ lecture about heterosexuals, he didn’t even think WORK was a real word. It still looked funny. Not funny ha ha either. More like an EWWWW! Yeah. That kinda funny.
Apparently, it’s written in lowercase letters as well. Double EWWWW!!! He def wasn’t there yet, but Brad knew one day with tons of effort by other people it may just be possible. Social efficiency was still underground. The trees were smart to live there so he did too.
Brad then looked at the selfie and the clock. 1:30pm on the dot. He typed “WEEERRQQ!!!!!” & hit send. Suddenly, he was feeling statuesque.
Boxed lunch.
WERQ. Brad wondered how the gays spelled it in Australia. He also wondered how many people there named their kids Crocodile. HAYYYY!!!
Brad text the photo of him in full costume over to his agent. Was the wardrobe 20th century ironic overkill or post-post-post modern Madonna blatancy?!
For Brad to really WERQ this Dollar Store photo shoot, he needed to know the backstory behind the costume and it’s designer, as well a passable fabricated construct of the social media campaign.
Who was the creator? What drove he/her/them? Influenced he/her/them? Inspired he/her/them? Made he/her/them who they are?
After wondering briefly if he left out too many pronouns, Brad then text the words “storytelling” “impact” and “authenticity” exactly five seconds apart. While he found intention rarely mattered in life, he knew buzz words always got you places.
Sooooo… Where was that exactly?
Brad would learn from AI that afternoon it was a public pool in the Valley about 20 min from Kim K's mansion in regular heavy traffic.
Five minutes later, his agent would call to commend him for 'the richness in texture of his texts.' Apparently, contrast was everything when it came to... well, everything.
Wowsers! Being all over the place was finally paying off.
Brad would gleefully repeat the phrase ‘texture of texts’ until just before dinner when his boyfriend Chris told him to ‘cut it out’ Full House style. Brad had just enough time to research the gesture on the internet before sitting down but couldn't decipher if it was offensive until he pushed his kale salad around the plate long enough to feel full himself. Then it just clicked.