Xiao Imagines - Tumblr Posts

Im not sure if you’ve done this already, but do u mind doing a dating xiao (genshin impact) moodboard?

Dating Xiao <3

=͟͟͞͞ ⌧ : bbygurl <3

💚🩵🖤

heaven on earth ✭ ˎˊ-

ft. social media au ⸝⸝ idol!xiao x reader

synopsis ; — in which you befriend your next door neighbour who, unbeknownst to you, was apart of a soon-to-be one of the most popular bands throughout liyue. you're unable to tell if cupid was helping you or not when things with xiao keept going up and down. will he continue to keep his secret from yours truly?

genre — 5wirl band au, next door neighbour (apartment but same thing), slow-burn, fluff, crack, angst (at some point yea), modern au, flirty x shy trope, sfw, includes writing ✰

staus — on-going

PROFILES — sleep deprived workaholics / an(emo) qties

table of contents !

00. prologue .. once upon a time ✮

01. cupid meter !

02. information acquired !

03. gift from stranger !

04. communication is key ✮

05. gift for stranger !

06. pride or nice !

07. unwinding !

08. a new number !

09. out of character !

10. unfamiliar warmth ✮

11. yet !

12. surely a dinner !

13. who he really is !

14. free tickets !

15. hint of the past !

16. arrivals !

TAGLIST [OPEN] — @mikctp @ghostlysyntaxed @kazemiya @nnasv @gojoandelsalovechilde @candy-purple-cyanide @kissingkzuha @zyilas @lunaavity @luminescent-light @mave-in @rizakari @riikyu @kokoscutie @starsxnight @sketcheeee @softlie @izakyun @xiaxilia @the-sweet-madame

(ask to be added or removed)

amusing beginnings.

premise: the dramatic prelude of a tale spun by the workings of fate, weaved with strings of scarlet linking futures untold. this is a story of innocence, of unforeseen encounters offering no clue of a romance that will blossom much, much later — this is how you begin together, yet there is no telling if there will ever be a proper conclusion for the prose you call love.

or, plainly speaking, a series of meet-cute scenarios i am far too lazy dedicating individual fics for. i just wanted to sound smart about it.

includes: xiao & itto !

xiao, a friend from an mmo game

moving to a different town and entering a new school in the middle of the year... are inconvenient. friend groups within the class had already been established, and badgering your seatmate to put up with your presence during lunch break or free time outside of lessons when you just don't click together as friends doesn't sound very appealing.

it doesn't help that you aren't extroverted, bumbling and awkward as you try to interact with others more. but if you don't want to feel like a loser for the entire year, you'd have to exert some effort to make friends.

so when you hear about a multiplayer game everyone's been raving about, you thought that was your chance to fit in — after all, if you had common interests with your classmates, couldn't you invite them to play together or something?

thus, you download the game, lament the astronomical numbers of space it took up in your storage, and experiment with the controls until you get more familiar with them.

except some high-leveled assholes who have nothing better to do keep killing your poor level 1 in-game character, armed with a dull sword, starter equipment, and flimsy armor that had no way to defend against level 41 fire blasts, and wait until you respawn to do it all over again. with this hindering your progress, you couldn't complete the main quest in order to advance to the next area.

they taunt you in the world chat, too obnoxiously prideful for someone miserable enough to pick on amateurs, and that's when he appears:

geared in what looks like expensive armor, equipped with rare weapons retrieved from the highest difficulty of dungeons, his name written in bright front and his level, 174, just above it. alatus, his ID reads.

it takes him no more than one move to wipe them all out.

what are you doing? he types in the world chat. hurry up and go before they respawn.

thank you so much!!!!! you reply with a flurry of exclamation points and emotes, shocked that you'd run into someone so high leveled right off the bat. the other players in the server watching the spectacle seem to think he's intimidating and steered clear of him, making a wide circle around you.

though he told you to hurry up, he lingers by your side, almost like he's guarding you. he escorts you all the way until you finish the main quest, not speaking a word and only silently killing surrounding enemies too high for your level.

you wonder if it would be too cheeky of you to send a friend request; he's one of the best in the server, boasting all kinds of achievements and artifacts in his player profile. why would he be interested in befriending a newbie like you?

you're terrible at this, he sends in the chat. this is the first i've seen anyone flubbing basic attacks. don't just press any button you see.

you cringe. his words are harsh but truthful. you kept pressing the wrong buttons to dodge and always receive the brunt of the attacks.

however, you pause when a notification flashes on your screen: player alatus has sent you a friend request! accept or decline?

jolting, you scramble to click accept, lest he take it back last minute. can he even do that? whatever. following that is a present from a friend sent to your mailbox, a pair of level 50 dual blades and defensive armor. they pale in comparison to his current gear, but they're plenty powerful for normal players, especially for an amateur who barely just reached level 7 after grinding some missions (and with help).

old equipment. needed to clear out my inventory, he adds, as if he doesn't want you to get the wrong idea.

you've lost track for the amount of times you've thanked him in the past hour or so, and you try to send more exclamation points and different emotes so you wouldn't appear like a broken record. though i appreciate everything, can i ask you why you're helping a new player like me? you ask tentatively, eager to hear his answer.

there isn't much else you can do at this level. that's all there is to it. and you were pitiful.

...kind of pretentious, but okay...

can i play with you again some other time? you type before the thought of wanting to do so even registers in your mind. not just so you can help me. it's been really fun spending time with you!!!

three minutes of silence pass. your confidence to reach out and make friends shriveled up and died.

sure.

then, later, i usually play at evening or at midnight. our schedules might not line up.

there's no problem! i stay up most nights, too!

then i'll see you some other time. i'm logging off.

relief crashes over you, only dwindling when alatus has gone offline. he was fine with being friends... and promised to play together again in the future... well, maybe not promise, but something like it, and that's enough.

--

the months fly by, and opposed to your prior concerns, you fit in class just fine. playing the mmo game to have a common interest with your classmates was the right move, and it had opened ways for you to connect with others more through other similar hobbies.

but even after you achieved your goal, you didn't drop the game. you're not the most avid player, but you grind dungeons a normal amount, clearing time-limited events if you find them entertaining enough.

it's mostly just to spend time with alatus, though.

alatus, or xiao as you later learned after you exchanged your real names, is quite the charmer. not that you've ever seen his face; he is just... cute, in general. he appears gruff and intimidating, but really, he's an awkward guy who can't act soft because it's “undignified.”

you think he is sweet and kind, though you'll never say it to his face since it'll only make him feel embarrassed. not only does he come to save you each time you tell him you're having a hard time defeating a boss in your private chat, and he gives away precious weaponry and potions to you exclusively as if any other player wouldn't willingly hand over all their gold just to get a piece of it, he makes a great listener.

you have a bad habit of rambling and getting immersed in your thoughts at late hours of the night. you speak of your insecurities, your weaknesses, your fears, and he listens even if he doesn't type a reply all throughout your flood of messages. he keeps his response concise, but they're thoughtful advice, ones that you take into heart. he's a comforting figure, regardless of being a stranger behind a screen.

sometimes, you like to think you're sorta the same for him. xiao isn't as straightforward as you when he wants company, but he asks if you can stay online longer than usual, just to talk or to do the more relaxing tasks in the game. he trusts you to an extent, enough to offer exchanging real names at least.

enough to ask you to marry him.

your in-game character, of course! what else could that possibly mean?! okay, so you may have nearly fallen out of your chair in shock when he sent you a marriage proposal through chat of all things, but that's all it means! nothing more!

there was a couples-exclusive event dungeon, and the loot was desirable. some beautiful skins for pure cosmetic, and also a power-enhancing ring that you couldn't find anywhere else. xiao, the game nerd that he is, couldn't pass it up.

so yeah. technically, you can say you married him.

it was a hot topic at some point. alatus was one of the best players in the server, notorious for his aversion to cooperating with others, and he hadn't married anyone despite all the rewards you could reap with the marriage function.

then there's you, level 47, not especially skilled in anything, not especially appealing in your character's outward appearance, and not especially... notable. the very meaning of an average player, so to speak. he specifically chose you, but nobody could understand why.

well. whatever. the marriage is old news already. the present hottest news is the huge gaming convention to come in two weeks. fans are hyping it up and you'd be lying if you said you weren't excited too. in fact, your friends already made plans with you to come on a weekend.

when you talk to xiao about it, there's a rare moment of hesitance before he types out a reply, almost like the times where he gets nervous before asking you a favor.

are you going too? you ask, grinning to yourself.

yeah, he answers back. a minute and a half of silence.

then, startlingly, do you want to meet up?

you've always doubted the feasibility of choking on air before, but after experiencing it firsthand, you learn that anything really is possible. including meeting the elusive guy you've had a massive crush on, no matter how unlikely it seemed.

--

you are severely late.

but! for good reason! you'd hate to look like a hobo, so you made sure to dress nicely! ...maybe too nicely for a gaming convention where everyone will be sweaty and icky, but better prepared than sorry!

somehow, i'm not even surprised, reads xiao's text — yes! you exchanged numbers! — and you can picture him scoffing at the other end. don't rush and trip in the middle of running. i'm not going anywhere.

you ignore the way your heart skips a beat at that and focus on getting there safely. he said to do just that, after all. but while waiting at the crosswalk, you wonder what xiao really looks like... would he be tall and scary? or unexpectedly soft and cute?

in all honesty, you should've sent pictures of yourselves to identify each other easier at the venue, but against your better judgment, you suggested only describing your attire and keeping your appearances a secret because the mystery is “fun” and it'd be nicer to see each other for the first time face to face. (you've only been trying to prolong your inevitable death, because whatever he looks like, you're bound to fall deeper anyway.)

i'm here, you text to him, beginning to anxiously look around your surroundings. he said to meet up at the entrance, and there are more people than you expected...

i'll find you. stay by the first advertisement banner at the front.

alright!

you bite your lip, clammy hands holding your phone tightly. you're a lot more nervous than you thought you would be. did you look okay? you've asked your friends over and over again if you looked presentable, enough times to annoy them, probably. you styled your hair differently too... you wonder if it looks weird. xiao said he would be wearing a green jacket and dark pants, and he had piercings in his ear, and then you can't remember what else because oh my god, what does xiao look like with piercings in his ear.

you snap out of your thoughts when a path opens up in front of you. first, there are disgruntled noises from people being pushed away, then they disappear like wisps of smoke the second after. quiet gasps of surprise come from the group of girls nearby, and if you had to guess, it would likely be a good-looking cosplayer passing by.

the figure stops in front of you, sneakers in your line of sight where you stare blankly at the floor. slowly, your eyes rake up — dark fitting jeans, a trail of silver chains disappearing under the hem of a green jacket, a white shirt printed with dragons...

you're reluctant to glance anywhere higher above the line of his neck.

“[name]?”

fuck.

it's him.

you take a deep breath, squeezing your eyes shut. then you look up, properly.

you see golden eyes, specks of stars glittering in his irises.

his skin is pale, pink from the warm sun. his lips are pink too, a traitorous part of your mind marvels, slightly parted in surprise and shaped around an o. his hair is dark, tied up into a messy ponytail, sharp tips dyed in teal poking his cheek, framing the sides of his face.

oh no. he's hot.

he is so hot.

and he's staring at you.

“x... xiao?” your voice comes out strangled. embarrassingly. oh god. you are so fucked.

his face grows redder, and he scratches his cheek. “...that's me.”

silence.

you have to say something.

“do you... want to go outside?” he coughs into a fist. “the event has already started.”

“uh, yeah! sure! of course!” you ramble, walking past him in the hopes you wouldn't make a bigger fool of yourself. your face looks weird, surely. “i can't wait to see the cosplayers! they're also announcing a new chapter for the main story today, aren't th-”

“wait.”

he catches your wrist. you stop breathing, at risk of choking on air again.

“it's crowded.” his hand curls tighter. oh no. “don't get lost.”

“i won't, what are you talking about?” you laugh awkwardly. seeing him, hearing him, touching him, is such a strange thing.

“i wouldn't be surprised if you did.” his fingers dip lower, fitting in the spaces within yours. properly holding your hand. oh. oh. “so don't wander off without me.”

“yeah.” you're positively breathless. “yeah. i won't.”

he squeezes your hand. you're not looking at him directly, but you see him tilting his head at the corner of your eye. “...no complaints about this?”

“none at all.”

“okay.” he squeezes again. carefully, tenderly. his palms are sweaty. at least that tells you you're not the only one nervous. “if you say so.”

itto, a delinquent in the downpour

arataki itto is an idiot.

an idiot who keeps picking fights with people he can't beat, and kujou sara tells him off for it. an idiot who grabs the last piece of fried chicken on the table, agrees to thoma's proposal for a battle of rock-paper-scissors to get it, only for itto to lose each time. an idiot who bets on his entire deck of trading cards in his beetle fights, never truly realizing the risk until he'd already lost everything to kamisato ayato.

but arataki itto doesn't regret.

he doesn't regret trying to beat kujou sara even if it's his loss in the end, because she doesn't look down on him for losing and his friends are always there to patch him up. he doesn't regret doing rock-paper-scissors with thoma, because thoma would end up sharing the piece of chicken anyway. he doesn't regret betting on his deck, because ayato is never greedy, and he will always, always give it back to itto and tell him to try better next time.

arataki itto doesn't regret it this time either, even if he doesn't gain anything. even when he's battered and bruised, drenched in the rain, slumped against a wall in the middle of a dark alley. even when the boy he just saved from money-grubbing hooligans didn't spare him another look nor gave him any word of thanks, left him to fend for himself when the men's hostility had already been directed at him. never called for help, either, just allowed him to be outnumbered in a fight, and as strong itto is, there's no way he can beat five bulky guys on his own.

he doesn't regret, but it stings a little.

his entire body prickles with hurt, but at the same time he's unfeeling, numb in the cold rain. his line of sight is getting blurry, too, blobs of color instead of people darting past, streetlights small bright spots like fireflies.

he tries to open his mouth to ask for help, but that stings too. a busted lip, maybe. his voice is feeble, silent in his own ears. it can't be heard over the pouring rain. he tries to sit up straighter, but the effort to nudge his shoulder back exhausts all his energy. he wants to reach out a hand at least, but before he can even try, his body won't listen to him. his eyes close against his wishes.

he knows for sure he isn't too deep in the alley. can't anybody see him? or are they deliberately ignoring him because they don't want trouble? there's nothing wrong with that, really. not everyone has the time to help, or the bravery to approach a big guy covered in wounds. he understands. but he still hopes anyway.

ah, it's cold. the brick wall behind him is rough. his clothes are uncomfortable, sticking to his skin like this.

he forces his eyes open. there, he sees a pair of shoes, forming ripples across puddles when they step closer.

they halt.

they turn the opposite direction.

they leave him alone.

(he doesn't notice the umbrella they leave behind.)

--

he wakes up to someone patting his cheek. someone is speaking, but everything is muddled. it's still cold, and his back is still resting against the brick wall. but there's no rain anymore, only the pitter-patter sound when it hit the pavement.

he wonders how long he'd been shielded away from it.

“...llo... can... stand...”

stand. do they want him to stand? he's afraid that's too much to ask for.

the rain covers him again, icy drops falling on his skin. warmth overlaps with the frost, grabbing his arm, curling it around... something. he's being lifted up. not very effectively, but they're trying.

so he tries his best too. shifting his weight, blinking his eyes open, staying awake. they take him somewhere. it's dry, and when they push him over, it's to a plush seat. they don't complain when he leans his head on their shoulder, possibly soaking their clothes with his wet hair. he has to apologize, but sleep overtakes him.

itto doesn't remember much after that. just a hand on his forehead for some time, parts of his body wiped and wrapped in gauze. a blanket tucked carefully around him, fingertips brushing by his shoulders before they leave.

--

when he fully comes to, the first thing that registers to his mind is a room full of white. white sheets, white ceilings, white curtains. then a head of blue hair, standing by the window.

“oh, you're awake!” ayato exclaims, beyond relieved. “i was surprised when i picked up your call and it was someone else speaking. good thing they rushed you to the hospital, huh?”

“someone took me here?” itto asks, sitting up. “where are they?”

“they took off after i arrived. said they were late to an interview because they had to stay here... ah. that must've meant they probably didn't get the job...” he murmurs, grimacing. “i should've asked for their number so we can thank them properly. no point trying to find them now, though.”

but itto saw them. not very clearly, but he remembers kind eyes glazed in worry, a shirt partly soaked through, and a silver star hanging from their necklace.

arataki itto was never especially smart, but if anything, he is stubborn, and if he put his mind to it, he can do anything.

--

“isn't there any part-time job out there that doesn't pay minimum wage?”

“what? you saving up for something?”

“summer vacation is coming, you know! vacation trips aren't going to pay for themselves,” you sigh, burying your face in your folded arms.

“it's not like you have a boyfriend to spend it with.”

“can't i go on a vacation with friends?”

“and who are these friends you speak of? everyone is dating somebody. they're probably too busy,” she retorts, looking envious. “even xiao has someone when all he does is play games everyday.”

you scrunch your nose. “damn those happy idiots...”

“that aside, i thought you found a good part-time job? you didn't get it?”

hearing that, you turn even gloomier. “i didn't tell you? i blew it. i came late on the interview, and that didn't make a very good first impression. plus i looked horrible from the rain.”

“hm. find a rich boyfriend, then.”

“like who...?”

“kamisato ayato from the other department?” your friend suggests, grinning. “he's good looking. his sister is pretty too, i saw them walking together once.”

you snort. “way out of my league. i'm better off not hoping.”

“don't be like that~ i heard he was going to attend the next mixer. thoma told me himself-”

the door to the lecture hall opens, interrupting your conversation. “is [name] here?” a voice queried, rough and a tad bit too loud.

“right he-”

your friend slaps a hand over your mouth frantically, turning you away from the door. “what are you doing?!”

“what?” you blink up at her, whispering, “he's asking for me, isn't he?”

“didn't you see who it was?” she hisses, shielding you from view. “arataki itto! the one who beat up a senior on his first day as a freshman, remember?!”

arataki itto?

doesn't ring a bell.

“come on, that's just a ridiculous rumor, isn't it?” you wave her off, laughing. “wasn't kazuha rumored to have a criminal record at some point? you should know better than to believe them. so don't worry and let go of me, i'm sure he's not-”

your eyes flit to his sharp eyes, gleaming with intent, and his muscular build that could probably crush your skull with a single hand.

“...going to kill me...” your voice trails of too a whisper, face paling in horror. “on second thought, please be my meat shield?”

“[n-name] is over there!” a terrified classmate points in your direction the moment itto turns to glance at him inquisitively. a snitch! a tattletale! you're never lending him your notes ever again. given that you live another day, that is.

“oh. thanks.”

how polite! thanking him for his contribution in your likely murder!

“wait wait wait, what does he want with me?!” you shrink further behind your friend, but there is no escape. he can see you peeking over her shoulder.

“shouldn't you know that?! did you piss him off or something?!”

“i don't know! i've never seen him before!” you cried. you really haven't! you swear you have nothing to do with him! you don't deal with people who look like trouble! sure you might have dragged a delinquent to the hospital a few weeks before, but he was unconscious and defenseless! he could barely stand! this guy can punt you off to mars!

“you're [name], right?” his eyes sparkle with recognition, just an arm's width away from you now. your friend, traitor that she is, silently moves away.

an involuntary squeak is punched out of your lungs. “y... yes, that's me,” you respond meekly, attempting a wobbly smile. “did you need me for something?”

itto clears his throat, expression similar to that of a constipated man's. “well... that is... i was... how do i say this...”

the deafening silence stretches for what seems like hours. the back of your neck prickles at the attention, everyone's eyes focused solely on the pair of you. you can't read him at all. what kind of offense did you do that he had to come to you like this?

“ah, dang it, 'm not good at things like this...” he grumbles, scratching his head.

eh? what is he not good at? public execution? no, no, he wouldn't go that far right?

“so, what i'm trying to say is-!”

he flails about, thrusting out the hands he'd been hiding behind his back. a bouquet of pink roses, delicate and small, is curled within his grasp. your eyes widen, taken aback, turning even wider when you see the way his cheeks redden, entire face aflame, fingers trembling nervously. his face, pinched tight with restless energy, is nothing but earnest and sincere.

“i admire you a lot! i...” he takes an intake of breath. “i would like to court you!”

and, ever so eloquently, you respond with, “wuh?”

and when he leaves you in the dark. xiao x gn!reader. warnings: angst, xiao dies, 2.7 chasm update spoilers. wc: 1,906. semi proofread.

in each of xiao’s waking moments, he thinks of you.

he thinks of the sun rising in your eyes when you turn to look at him. he thinks of your smile brighter than the moonlight when you tell him about your day. he thinks of the warmth in your hands when you gently grab his own, tugging on him to lead the way.

and as his body grows weaker with each passing second from the fantastic compass, he thinks about you. as though his ears are filled with water, the loud yelling of yanfei and paimon is drowned away by his thoughts of you—it has always only been of you.

you always hated how self-sacrificial he was. your shoulders would slump when you’d hear him utter his thoughts and you’d angrily bite back your tears. you’d wrap your arms around his waist after and tell him it was all nonsense—that he still had you.

that should there come a day the stars will not align, xiao will still have you.

you would never miss the sudden look in his eyes, yet he smiles lightly and nods every time.

when the platform shatters and so does his mask, vanishing slowly as the strength in him dies a little more, xiao finally remembers what you had said to him before he left.

“come back home to me.”

you had been playing with his fingers when you spoke, not once looking up at him—missing the ghost of a smile on his lips. someone like you was too far for xiao to reach but still, he wallowed in your affection and surrendered himself fully.

you who has been blighted by someone like xiao, a demon who has slain thousands—mortals and gods alike. xiao wished back then that he had stayed away, kept to himself on the balcony of wangshu inn and never helped you with your problems.

for someone as awkward as him, xiao learned to breathe and love. love someone so different, someone who is not like him; and will never be like him. he learned to breathe you in as though you and he do not know where the two of you had begun and when you two had become whole.

“okay, i will,” xiao whispered that night. it was a promise to you and him—he’d come back home, safe and sound, to you.

then you looked up at him that time, smiling lightly as your eyes interlocked. you had noticed the fondness in his eyes, hand reaching up to cup his cheek. cute, you thought—but you’d never tell him that.

xiao supposes this would be the only time he has broken a promise to you. of the countless promises he had kept, this would be the only one he would have to break, whether he had a choice or not.

he staggers back, breath heavy and so is his body. they all look at him—yanfei, yelan, the traveler, paimon, and shinobu—with wide eyes as he stands weakly, eyes travelling towards the opening above them.

he would apologize if he could, take you once more into his arms and kiss your nose. he would apologize for everything he couldn’t have done with you and ask for your forgiveness. he knew you’d accept him as you always have.

xiao knows that his time is running out.

the color green engulfs his right hand as he balls it into a fist, knowing this would be his last act. heroic—he thinks, idiotic—you’d say. 

“i like the color green,” you told him once on a stroll.

xiao paused in his steps, turning to look at you with a raised brow. “green?” he repeated.

“yeah, i like it,” you hummed. “everything about you is green—you’re green.”

he didn’t know what it meant during that time, only that he knew you liked it because of him. xiao took every chance to take home every colored green object in sight when he would go out.

he brought a four-leaf clover once, hoping that it would bring you any luck compared to being with him. xiao left it on your hands with a shy smile as you stared at it with a smile.

everything else followed after that. xiao would grab a jade stone should he see one, a beautiful water lily when he passes by the lake, a green flower when it blooms at night.

when the sunset came and you laid your head on his shoulder by a tree trunk, xiao hesitantly asked, “why the color green?”

you didn’t move from your position, instead, you took a look at the setting sun. “i just like it,” you answered. “but, if you really want to know…”

xiao gazed at you, watching the way your lips would move, nose scrunch up when you smiled, and eyebrows moving when you spoke. he then glanced at the sky and the setting sun—it was pink and purple, something you always loved to stare at, even more than you loved the color green, that he knew.

“does that answer your question?” xiao blinked. ah, he didn’t listen.

“it does,” he said, hand slowly reaching towards yours, intertwining it with his. 

though he feels disappointed in himself for never hearing your answer, xiao realized there, you are more beautiful than the sun setting. should the sun itself disappear, xiao would follow you to the ends of the earth just to watch the sunset in your eyes.

this time, however, xiao understands why you like the color green—it symbolizes his protection. the color engulfs his companions, a bright light green that he knew would protect them and bring them to safety, and he knew that it would bring only them.

xiao watches as yelan reaches out to him, yelling something incoherent in his ears, then finally, they disappear and leave him on his own. 

the platform below him cracks and xiao falls.

he wonders what you would have said to him should you know he sacrificed himself for others—only this time, he isn’t coming back. it was his job, his duty—it was bound to happen at one point. it was something you always refused to accept, xiao shouldn’t have to bear the burden of others.

“you first before others,” you said one time. “why should you put your life on the line for them?”

it was in the contract—he would have said. but xiao was bound by no contracts (at least anymore), only his morals and his guilt. his sins were far greater than any living adeptus and he must suffer for all eternity for what he has done.

but you show him that he doesn’t have to bear the burden of others, that like everyone else, xiao is loved. and he is loved deeply and greatly by none other than you.

to others love may be a burning fire of desire, to know all of your deepest secrets, or kissing below the shade of the trees in spring and waiting for the flowers to fall. but for you, you show xiao that love to you is simply him.

and xiao knows that you love him more than you do yourself.

it’s only that xiao knows in himself that you are the epitome of love itself—and he will love you even until death.

“what are you holding?” you came up to him on a cold night by the balcony. the wind blew and howled, you shivered slightly as you make do with your hands rubbing your arms for any source of warmth.

xiao turned to you, holding a crystal-fly in his right hand. “i thought it would suit you,” he murmured, reaching out to tuck the piece in your hair. 

he gazed at you, a light smile on his lips as you touched the crystal-fly on your hair gently. xiao was right whenever it came to you—something he was always proud of, and the only thing he was proud of in himself.

“i love it,” you whispered.

“i love you,” xiao whispered back—barely audible but he knows you hear it, and wants only you to hear it.

[name], when tomorrow starts without me, i hope you feel relieved.

he has seen the mountains fall and the oceans rise, but xiao knows that he has loved only you, and forever will only be you. 

but i hope you know that i will love you even if there are no clouds in the sky and the setting sun has become dull in your eyes.

and as he falls into his doom, xiao remembers your smile, the crinkle of your eyes, the laugh you let out when he takes you too seriously, the warmth of your hugs, and the love that you brought him.

“what’s your favorite flower?” he had asked suddenly.

you thought for a few seconds as you say, “oh, i don’t know.”

xiao frowned.

“but if there was a flower like you, i would choose that one,” is what you said after.

you gave him a bright smile, laughing at your own words—still, they were true. wrapping your arms around his neck, he staggered backwards, holding your waist to steady the both of you. should there be a garden full of flowers, you would choose xiao again and again.

“that’s nonsense,” xiao clicked his tongue.

“huh? hey! i thought it was cute!”

his eyes shoot open.

for once in his life, xiao reaches up towards the small light and wishes it would grab him just as how you pulled him out of his misery.

what would you think?

what would you say?

what would you do when the news comes to you?

as he falls, tears spring to his eyes as he remembers you. the only person in his life who had shown him love. the only person who had cried when he came home with blood on him. the only person who he knows would be devastated when you find out the truth about what had happened to him.

if only xiao had stayed far away from you, it wouldn’t have ended up like this—you would not have to cry for him.

until xiao’s final moments, he thinks about you.

--

“i’m sorry, xiao has died.”

the smile on your face fades, handpicked qingxins now lay by your feet as your hands drop to your sides. verr goldet stands in front of you, a solemn look on her face—you watch her lips move but you could barely hear what she says.

xiao has died.

xiao has died?

you open your mouth to thank her for bearing you the news, but it stays open. there was nothing to say. she watches as you tremble, the gloss in your eyes fading—a look she had first seen on xiao when you had not come for a week.

with a shaky voice, you reply, “okay… thank you.”

you should have seen it coming; that one day, xiao would not return safely in your arms. the longer you stand in front of verr goldet, the heavier your body becomes, dragging you down as if it wishes to bring you with xiao himself. for now, you will weep for your dead lover.

you hope that in xiao’s final moments, he knows that should he and you walk this world once again with no remnants of each other, you will find him again and again.

notes i thought about xiao finally resting but wipee go down with me he worries about leaving you alone so in his last final moments he's desperately trying to cling onto whatever faith he has left in himself to go back to you but <3 he can't tada hehe also i hope the transitions are understandable as you can see the reader isn't with xiao in the chasm, so all you saw are xiao's memories with you just loving him or as i like to call it his life flashing before he dies :p i wrote this in one day i can't believe but i had to edit it a lot because my metaphors didn't seem right, i am not an english major so i am horrible at this

taglist @ljinghe @yaefics @imtoodumbforaname@sugxqts @wccycc @hangesextra@queens-knave @quinnwas @lucy-roo @selenshinitai @luvvmeilin @akiyutaa @prilux @ghostiedolly @17an @lordbugs @monicahar @pissied @plinkuro @kiyowoir // join the taglist here

if your blog is not highlighted, it means i cannot tag you and you may have to put your blog out of being hidden! :)

BOYFRIEND! XIAO WHO. . .ᐟ — xiao

—✩ content: established relationship, reader is gender-neutral, modern+university au, kinda a sneak peek to this smau im making, mild suggestive content (its just a paragraph)

—✩ author’s note: back to my og roots aka xiao!

Boyfriend! Xiao who is well-known as your university’s heartthrob; due to his indifferent, cold and nonchalant demeanor. No one has the courage to approach him; always sent running with their tails hidden between their legs just by one mere warning glare thrown their way. No one dares to approach him, except for you; his beloved partner. Only you were granted the privilege of witnessing his usual stoic features softening when his golden eyes landed on your approaching figure. 

Boyfriend! Xiao who wasted no time in wrapping an arm around your waist, pulling you close until you were snugly pressed against his side. He scowled whenever someone’s eyes lingered on you way longer than his liking. Compared to people's thinking, he isn’t shy to show he is in a relationship with you. 

Boyfriend! Xiao whose clothes were slowly taking up more space in your closet and he doesn’t want it any other way. He will never admit it out loud but he feels pleased and satisfied whenever he sees you wearing his clothes to class. He strongly insists you should keep them whenever you want to return it to him, always telling you that he can simply buy more for himself (and for you too).

Boyfriend! Xiao who is also a pro Valorant player. He only plays Jett and no one else and he easily crushed his opponents whenever he participates in a yearly gaming tournament held by the university. With his insane movements and aims, it was a piece of cake for him and his team to win the first spot for themselves. 

Boyfriend! Xiao who has lots of patience when it comes to helping you with your assignments or Valorant. He never raises his voice at you and he never shows any signs of annoyance. He knows you are trying your best and that’s simply all that matters. If (although very rarely), he does get annoyed at you, he will feel guilty and comfort you; reassuring you in a hushed tone that he doesn’t mean it and that he believes in you. 

Boyfriend! Xiao who has a secret gallery filled with images he took of you without you knowing. The images range from you napping to you either using your phone, playing games and so on. No one, even you, knows about the gallery and he prefers to keep it that way. There are times when he will look through the images with a lovesick smile on his face. It’s like he could never get enough of you. 

Boyfriend! Xiao who will not hesitate to step in if anyone dares to make you feel uncomfortable. Sending prayers to the poor person because Xiao is not afraid to use physical measures to get them to back off. Nothing else matters the moment he sees you attempting to move away, only to be blocked by some irrelevant human being. 

Boyfriend! Xiao who makes it a point to hold your hand when you are in crowded places. According to him, he does this so he won’t lose sight of you but you knew it was more than that. Nonetheless, you allowed him to hold your hand, savoring his warmth and how his hand fit yours; like the final piece to a puzzle. Sometimes, he will even rest a hand on your back as he guides you forward, ensuring you are constantly within his sight. What he doesn’t know is the effect he has on you; how butterflies fly about in your stomach and how your cheeks flushed red. 

Boyfriend! Xiao who tends to feel needy and whenever he is craving for your attention, he always embraces you from behind. The only warning you got was him sliding his hand underneath your shirt along with him pressing his lips to the back of your neck. He has a tendency to leave marks on you, leaving them in places that are hard to hide from the public. He feels satisfied with his work; a clear message sent out to anyone who dares to try and flirt with you. 

“i wish you would forgive yourself.”

you sit on the wooden railing of the balcony with your back turned to the world, legs kicking back and forth slightly. wangshu inn is a lantern lit heaven in the night, and you happen to be one of the many fireflies it has attracted.

xiao stares at you like you’re insane. “someone like me doesn’t deserve forgiveness. not after what i’ve done.” his mouth twists into a frown and you can already see him start to brood. “i’ve told you this.”

you sigh for the millionth time. “and i’ve told you that you shouldn’t suffer for something out of your control. and you’ve done more than enough to atone. besides—“ you take his hand in yours. “you’re so much more than your karma. i think you should recognize that.”

his scoffs at the idea, but you notice he doesn’t move to untwine your interlaced fingers. you grin a little.

“so, are you gonna come to the lantern rite?”

the lantern rite is absolutely stunning.

hundreds of glimmering lanterns dot the skies, hanging above liyue harbor and floating for miles on end. the moon, more alive than dead for once, hangs in the night. this year is particularly spectacular, likely because of the too-recent attack on the city.

despite the pointlessness of it all, it’s one of the things xiao allows himself to admire.

“it’s pretty, isn’t it?”

ah, you. the reason why he’s here in the first place, somehow.

perhaps it was your persistence, or the circumstances, or any number of other variables that could have led to this moment. begrudgingly, xiao admits to himself that he doesn’t regret coming here as much as he thought he would.

and then he looks over at you. you’re positively glowing, and his breath catches.

the lantern rite might be stunning, but you are nothing short of breathtaking.

to be vulnerable is to let yourself be bare, soft; to strip away everything until the only thing left is flesh and bone and skin. it is to carve out your soul and leave it at the mercy of someone else— trusting that they won’t leave you when you refuse to let yourself be anything but alone.

to xiao, a liability.

he is a weapon, an agent of bloodshed. vulnerability can only mean suffering for anyone who chooses to stay. (to be vulnerable is to be human, and he is anything but. when scarlet inks his hands, it is not of an innocent’s anymore. no longer the stain of humans, but of demons. this duty is repentance.)

and yet he finds himself soft for you.

soft, your hands as they cradle his face. and so, so warm. you tuck a lock of hair behind his ear, sweep a thumb across his bare cheek, and oh, how his heart trembles. he leans into your touch, shaky in resolve. (for how the mighty fall. for how long has it been since anyone has been this tender with him?)

and when you press a kiss to his lips, he lets himself melt into your hold. you are purer than anything he could ever dream of. you, divine and more than he deserves.

xiao is nothing like you, but perhaps he can learn.