L'appel Du Vide

L'appel Du Vide

He staggered from one pillar to another hoping that one of them would share his pain.

He walked through his school corridor meeting the judgemental glares of his fellow peers.

He passed by a class and saw a girl getting yelled at by her teacher. The teacher not knowing the pain the young girl goes through continues to batter her with harsh words.

He resumed walking, he realized that this place will never let him fail. No matter how hard things are ,this place will always remind how much he messed up, how he disappoints everyone and how he'll never live up to anyone's expectations.

The cold realization struck him when he found himself on the top floor of the school.

The cold air brushing his face with unkindness. He looks down and marvels how no one knows that he's up here, how no one knows who he is.

He's tempted to take the fall.

He wonders if he will do this will things change?

He wonders if he will do this will people finally realize and stop someone else from making a decision like this?

He truly wonders.

He sheds his jacket wanting to feel the coldness of the evening.

Wanting to be free of any warmth.

But at the same time he wants to be saved

He wants to be warm.

He understands that will never happen.

He knows that he will never experience a mother's love or a friend's trust.

After all who is he?

No one

And that's when he gives in to his temptation.

The earth capturing him in a trance and welcoming him with open arms.

In the few seconds of his flight he hoped that someone would catch him.

Someone would pacify his trembling heart.

But he knows truly that it will not happen.

And gladly welcomes the blackness that will keep him safe from the coldness of this world.

Call me by your name and I will call you by mine, is equivalent to, he is more myself than I am, whatever our souls are made of his and mine are the same.

Let's all go cry now.

I have three theories about the story of Icarus. Mostly its just me ranting at 3 in the morning and making the story gay. So, my apologies.

1. Icarus didn't fly towards the sun, he flew towards freedom.

This is only a slight variation of the actual story. In the actual myth Icarus flies towards the sun and he flies too high which is his ultimate downfall. Greediness that was his fatal flaw. However, in this variation, Icarus who has seen only huge stone walls as long as he could remember, just wanted freedom. That's all. He hadn't flown too high, he had simply wanted to fly from the maze walls that restricted him.

2. Apollo was jealous and Icarus was in love.

If you really know Greek mythology, you would know that Apollo had a boyfriend called Hyacinthus who was killed tragically by a wind God. The despair of Apollo was immeasurable. You must also know the story of Daphne. So yeah, Apollo's love life was quite tragic to say the least. Icarus who had only ever heard his father speak about the outside world wanted to see the Sun. So, when he was free, he flew too see the man he had fallen in love with. Of course Apollo didn't like this too much. He was a God and sometimes Gods were prone to insanity. He punishes Icarus for thinking that his love could succeed. For Icarus, the sea and land were enemies since the men who want to kill him prowl there, while the air, the Sun meant freedom and Apollo in all his bitterness kills him and punishes him in the most cruel way possible. Apollo has done something similar to this in the case of Patroclus and Achilles.

3. Apollo and Icarus are lovers.

If you look at Daedalus- Icarus' dad- he's not a very good guy. Like most inventors, he's a little crazy. He killed his own nephew, helped a queen screw a cow, was very appalled when he found out that there were consequences for his actions, killed a king for a mistake that he made and when Icarus fell to his death it is written that Daedalus mourned for his creation than the death of his son.

So, imagine this, the labyrinth is always easy to get lost into, Daedalus always worked and when he didn't, he was telling Icarus how he must be great and carry on the name of Daedalus.

Apollo who was always good at finding lovers-he just can't seem to keep them-finds Icarus. The nights in the Labyrinth are not lonely anymore. Apollo is thrilled to know that Icarus can leave with the wings his father creates. But Icarus knew, that if he got out, his father would force him to learn his crafts instead of music and art. Apollo and Icarus hatch a plan. His uncle helps him. After he falls Apollo drags him to the shore and takes him home. They say Icarus is dead because they don't want anyone to know that he's alive. His father might come looking for him, anyone whom Apollo insults might kill Icarus, so they lie. The uncle and nephew take the blame. The Sun God and the Sea God. Apollo makes him fall while Poseidon kills him. Enough people believe this. They make it a lesson for their children. While Apollo and Icarus, enjoy watching the world grow old, just happy that they are with each other.

This is just me, making the story of Icarus very gay. But make what you want of it. It could very well be just Icarus wanting to try something cool and dying tragically.

Let me know what you guys think.

Just a fun idea; whomever contributes the first letter in the ship name is the top, applying this rule, who tops in your favorite ship?

Harlowe is born the day his mother dies. He is breathing for the first time while his mother breathed the last. His father doesn’t hold, but his brother does, and he calls him Lyra because he thought Harlowe sounded like a lyre when he cried for the first time. His brother teaches him many things, he taught him about the kingdom they lived in, about the royal family, about how there is war always in the eastern front, how the oldest prince is always in the battlefield, about how the king had stopped caring for the kingdom, how kind the second prince is, how quiet the third prince is, how Harlowe should speak with elders, how to fight, how to be honorable and how to always stand for justice; these were the things his brother taught him.

His father is home only twice a year for three weeks, the rest of the days months his father is fighting as a soldier in the eastern front. Whenever his father comes home, he brings gifts and teaches Harlowe how to be a good soldier for the prince. His father always wore the colors of the royal family proudly, the color of gold and purple but his brother always disapproved with his father but never spoke out against him. After their father has left his brother would tell him, ‘Don’t worry. After him I will be given his position in the army. So, don’t dream about fighting, dream about everything else. Leave the burdens to me.’

As older he got clearer the world he could see. He could see how his father did not arrive during the time he was supposed to, he saw how hard his brother worked to pay the taxes that were on them relentlessly, he saw how there was barely enough food on the table, he saw how everything was slowly falling apart and how helpless he truly was.

Harlowe, like every other boy in this world, falls in love, only he doesn’t realize that it is love. She was beautiful, she was everything that he never thought he needed in his life, she was everything that kept him awake at night wondering how he survived so long without her. She slowly became his friend, his partner in crime to drive his brother up the wall, his most trusted person after his brother, his equal. She saw him in his highs and lows, in his anger and in his frustration and she still chose to be his friend. She was his equal in all aspects and when she spoke- forget butterflies, the whole forest came alive inside of him.

Then the thing that brought chaos arrived and it brought destruction to everything Harlowe had ever loved. The war on the eastern front was won, but the oldest prince was dead and so were a number of troops, then the king died after killing himself and the second prince ascended the throne. While the royal family threw a party for the celebration for the new king, Harlowe didn’t have it in him to be to be happy for anything. Because his father was now dead and his brother was given a post in the capital so now, they would have to leave to serve the king there. He would have to leave her. When he departs from her, so many things in him die and he feels that nothing would be right again.

Harlowe is fourteen when disaster strikes again. After a few years of apparent peace, the youngest prince rallies troops against the king and dethrones him in the palace at the middle of the night, the king flees but his followers get stuck. The new king is ruthless. He crowns himself as the High King, and anyone who supported the previous king is killed or arrested. The people who won’t swear fealty to him are sent to camps where they have to remain until they die. He throws the rich out of their homes, kills the corrupt, and destroys any form of perversion in the kingdom. He promises equality for everyone in this kingdom, he says that everyone in this kingdom should earn their place and even his ministers would be treated like everyone else and all he asked in return was peace and submission. Equality in all aspects, those had been his words. He utters these words while he stands next to the throne of this brother and father while still covered in blood from the massacre that had occurred that night.

Harlowe would have loved the King, if not for what happened next; Harlowe’s brother came to him the morning after the rebellion, telling him to pack his things so that they could leave. Harlowe’s brother had done something against the new King. The door to their small house is broken in and his brother shakes him and tells him to just survive. Harlowe knew that his brother had personally served the previous king but he wishes his brother would just kneel and beg when the guards force him to the floor and the High King demands something from him. Some truth, what it was, Harlowe did not know. His brother refuses to depart the truth, even when the King himself breaks Harlowe’s arm. His brother dies while looking at him and the King throws the sword his brother had carried at him. The King looks at him and asks, ‘Well?’ and Harlowe kneels and begs for his life and the King allows him to join the army. Harlowe has always been quick witted, he might seem like a coward for begging the man who killed his brother. But in the end, he will be the reason for the fall of that man.

Now years later, Harlowe stands before the man who killed his brother, he smiles while guards force him on his knees, his mentor- someone he had trusted- lies dead a few feet before him, he smiles as the executioner raises a sword against him. He smiles because he knows that even now, even if he kneels, he has won. Then it all goes black.

Shall we start from the beginning?

Are you ready?

Where art thou, my love?

Amongst the moon?

Amongst the stars?

Amongst the sun?

Where art thou, my love?

Amongst my foes?

Amongst my friends?

Amongst the beasts?

Where art thou, my love?

In my heart?

In my bones?

In my soul?

Where art thou my love?

In a kiss?

In a grasp?

In a word?

Where art thou, in my life?