Anyone Else Ever Feel Like Youre Faking Because Of How Many Alters Are In Your System??? Blue And I Feel

Anyone else ever feel like you’re faking because of how many alters are in your system??? Blue and I feel like that a lot and then we look at each other and go:

“We’ve literally had full blown conversations with these people. We literally cannot control them.”

But like… we’re nearly 400 alters (that we’re aware of). We feel really… unnaturally big. Anyone else feel this way?? Because we know they’re all real and not imaginary. But like… it’s still weird. Y’know??

-🩶👻

Any other fictives feel like this when they meet another introject of themself? (Whether in their own system or in another system)

-🐹

shout out to fictives who:

do keep their source name

dont keep their source name

feel disconnected from their source

have intentionally distanced themselves from their source

have an "embarrassing" or "cringy" source

really love their source

feel like they're too different from their source

really miss their source world, family, and friends

theres no right or wrong way to be a fictive, just be yourself and you're doing more than enough. ♡

This is me btw if anyone cares ;p

-🧸

singlets treat fictives like actual human beings challenge: impossible!!

(i swear to fucking god i'm going to lose it)

Any other hosts feel this… immense need for control that makes it so you never leave the front? No matter how badly you know it’ll be ok and you know your headmates are trustworthy and absolutely capable.

Because I often have a very hard time letting go of front and allowing myself to let others take control. The last time I talked about doing that, I was screamed at not to by a (now realized to be emotionally abusive/manipulative) ex-friend. But I know it’ll be ok. But I can’t seem to let my headmates take control without me at least partially present/in co because there is just this overwhelming anxiety that something will happen the moment I let my guard down.

The second I allow my guard to slip, shit will hit the fan. That’s how I feel 24/7. My headmates keep telling me it’s ok and that they understand. They all say they understand and that they will be there to help quell that anxiety as best they can because they know I’m so tired of being in the front constantly.

But that fear is still so fucking present.

Do any other hosts (or alters who aren’t designated as hosts but stay in front a lot) feel this? And does that anxiety ever go away?

-🍓