Ch.5: Secrets For The Future

Ch.5: Secrets for the Future

Ch.4 Ch.6

"Before we proceed with the festivities, I'd like to formally introduce myself. Fetch the dog!" Lofa yells out; seconds later Huata walks forwards and starts translating what he says. He suddenly swings at Huata, knocking her over after he saw Hinto try to run, knocking Huata into a tree.

'She's not standing up, I know that blow didn't kill her, but I'm mad as hell now!'

I look over to see Sespria and her cousin trying to wake Huata, but she seems to be in a state of unconsciousness, as later stated by Sespria's cousin. Sespria sends her off to fetch water, while I slowly crawl over to the tree Huata is next to.

Dasker bares his teeth then launches at Lofa, they are constantly clawing and biting at each other. Suddenly Lofa has grabbed Dasker's head with one of his massive fore paws, slowly pushing him back, whilst puncturing Dasker's neck with his long claws.

Dasker jumps to the side, raking his teeth across Lofa's arm as he jumps to the side; blood mating the fur on his head as it drips down his forehead. He tries to catch his breath but is smacked down by Lofa as the big cat corners him in anger. He stomps his massive paw onto Dasker's face, preparing to bite into his neck.

I get up, and launch, looking to the side for a split second to see Anemy launching at the big cat as well. I tear into his back leg while Anemy rips into his right forearm, causing him to jump back before letting out an angered roar.

Dasker stood up quickly, looking at us in anger before saying, "What are you doing here! You disobeyed my direct order!" He growls at us.

"Hmm. And this is the thanks we get for saving your butt. Hmm, figures, sit back and watch how it's done." With that she takes off, signaling with her tail for me to attack with her. As much as I thought I hated her, she's turning out to be an interesting character.

I race after Anemy as we attack the big cat, Anemy gets hit, but she seems fine so we continue to attack Lofa. Hinto launches at Lofa, but the big cat swipes at Hinto, successfully smacking him away while also leaving cuts across his muzzle.

We all continue launching ourselves at Lofa; Hinto latches onto Lofa's back leg while Anemy gets thrown to the ground. Lofa begins to repeatedly hit Hinto against the ground until Lofa eventually rips him off before throwing him across the floor like a rag doll. Dasker jumps forward and gets a few good hits in before Lofa has him pinned, pulling at his tail.

I turn to see Sespria and her cousin pouring water onto Huata's face, I look at her but she doesn't regain consciousness. Dasker lets out a loud, pained howl as his tail is ripped off and thrown to the side, blood spewing out of the freshly torn skin.

I look back to see Huata awake and looking at Sespria confused. After Sespria explains a little of the situation Huata walks towards us slightly.

"Stop it, all of you." Lofa looks up and growls at seeing Huata is awake. I try to get up but my body is extremely tired from exertion.

"Look at you all, you're causing more damage than good; even you Lofa. You with all your strength refuse to take us wolves seriously. You played this like a game, and you underestimated us as predators.

I know you're in pain to, choosing to ignore it won't make it go away." Huata voices as she looks at us. Lofa looks ready to kill her with all the growling and snarling he's doing; not to mention he's towering over Huata whilst standing on his back legs.

"Pain you say. I'LL SHOW YOU PAIN! I'LL PUT YOU OUT OF YOUR MISERY!" Lofa yells, but before he can attack her the white lynx from before appears in front of her.

'That lynx looks pissed off, but she doesn't stand a chance against a lion like Lofa; after all he's so much bigger and stronger than her.'

"You shall not cause harm to her. Your presence has drastically altered the natural balance of the forest. Be warned, it will not put up with you for much longer." The lynx states in a slightly threatening way.

"Oh look, we have a talking dog and now a talking house cat. Unfortunately for you kitty, I'm not looking to adopt anymore pets." Lofa exclaims before striding forward and slicing his claws across the chest of the lynx, successfully wounding and throwing her back from the force. However in mid air I see her wrap her arms around her body; when she lands I see she is no longer wounded.

She must be like Huata, I'm making an educated guess that all albino creatures will be like Huata, but that might be a false conclusion, but I'll have to wait to find out.

I look away from the lynx to see that the blood coating his body turns into thick vines that wrap and tangle themselves over him, thus leaving him immobilized.

"What kind of sorcery is this!" He yells in anger at his predicament. The vines have a new appearance, and are coated with thorns that puncture through Lofa's skin; causing him to roar in pain as he struggles to free himself. I turn back and walk next to Huata, watching as the lynx turns to face us; before disappearing the same way as before.

"Go. Now!" Sespria exclaims as she turns from Lofa to us.

"Goodbye Sespria, and thanks for everything." Huata responds.

"Don't forget about me." Sespria states as she watches Huata run after her pack mates.

"I believe we'll be seeing each other soon, whether it be on good or bad terms is your choice." I voice before sprinting after the rest of our pack; leaving Sespria to wonder what my words meant.

As we return to the clearing I see an angry looking Ash as she watches Huata and Anemy return with Dasker and Hinto. I decided to take a different route, which led me to come up on the other side of the clearing.

"Anemy! Huata! Are you crazy?!" Ash questions as she growls at them.

"Chill out mom, I'm fine." Anemy states while Huata stays quiet. I walk up and sit in between the two sisters; I'm starting to warm up slightly to Anemy, but she's still a little to bossy for us to become best friends.

I look over to see Trot trying to apologize for not watching over us, but Dasker simply walks away while Trot is in mid sentence. The pack follows after Dasker, while I fall in step next to Trot.

"Dasker just has a lot on his mind right now, he still accepts you even if you mess up every once in a while." I say trying to get Trot to loosen up on himself, after all it isn't his fault we all disobeyed the alphas order; and if he tried to stop us he wouldn't have really had any luck.

"Thanks Ceska, but it was my responsibility and I failed. I need to be more responsible; and if Dasker ignoring me is the price, then I must earn back his trust." Trot states, leaving no room for argument. We stop by Kilo's decomposing corpse, causing me to feel worried for Trot and Hinto who didn't react that well last time they saw it.

"You know, even though he could be a bully at times, he always knew how to make us laugh." Troy voices as he looks off, probably remembering a memory of Kilo. The laughing after a couple of seconds at what must have been a humorous memory.

"Yah, good ole Kilo; and to think that if it wasn't for him I wouldn't even be alive right now." Hinto states, but Huata suddenly begins to dig into the ground, creating a hole.

"Uh, why are you digging a hole?" Hinto questions in confusion.

"I hear it's how humans show respect for their dead." Huata answers before continuing to dig.

"It's respectful to throw dirt on them? Human culture is really strange." Hinto states as he questions why.

'You'll see what I mean." Huata states before pulling Kilo into the hole, then layering the dirt over his body, while the pack watches from the sides of the grave.

"You know what, it does look better. It's as if Kilo's at peace again, suddenly it's not so hard to smile." Trot voices as he looks up from Kilo's grave.

"Yah, I guess you're right." Hinto states as he looks at Kilo's grave as well.

The pack starts to howl, but soon after Dasker falls to the ground, and appears to be in a state of unconsciousness, probably due to all the injuries in his head and body which he failed to have treated.

_______

It's sunset when Dasker finally wakes up after being treated for his injuries, Ash sits up quickly after Dasker regains consciousness.

"You were all lucky to make it out alive, ugh. It's any wonder this pack needed this lot. We need to be out of here by morning." Ash states as she looks to Dasker to confirm the order.

Dasker seems to think for a moment before choosing Huata as his mate, to say she was unhappy was an understatement, but she hid it well so as to not offend him. To say Anemy was angry wasn't realistic, in fact she was well beyond angry as she watched Huata get chosen instead of herself.

"Oh come on, why her. After all the trouble I got in trying to save you; yet she gets captured by a pack of dangerous predators, and gets rewarded for it. Unbelievable. Okay enough already, it's about time someone said the obvious, she's blind. You hear me, blind." Anemy snarls out loud as she looks at Dasker.

"You're blind? What's that?" Hinto questions as he looks to the others in confusion.

"It means she cannot see Hinto." Ash responds.

"Exactly. She cannot see, do you really want to have offspring with someone like that; heck if anything choose me, Ceska is even better than my useless sister." Anemy states as she looks straight at Dasker.

"Let us not be angry at her for deceiving you, despite how wrong it was. We should instead cast pity upon her, it's not like she'll be able to appreciate how handsome and brave you are Dasker." Anemy adds before waiting for his new decision.

Dasker thinks for a few seconds before looking to me, I growl and snap my jaws at him before striding over and sitting slightly behind Trot. Dasker, seeing as he knows I will not do anything if unwilling finally looks over to Anemy where he then walks over and chooses her as his mate. They start to walk away, but not before Anemy sticks her tongue out at Huata.

"This is not how I wanted this to go about. Still it's best that he found out, are you okay with that Huata?" Ash asks as she looks at her daughter.

"I was never meant to be an Alpha female, it didn't mean anything to me; but I could've done without the humiliation." Huata responds before walking away, followed by Hinto. I was about to follow them but Trot jumped in front of me.

"What?" I question straight forward.

"Why did you refuse to become Alpha female? From what information I've collected from Ash, every female wants to be with the Alpha." Trot states in confusion and desperation. As he looks at me, awaiting my answer.

"Dasker isn't my type, and Anemy would have my throat, and I don't want that seeing as we're just starting to get along. After all, I've had another male on my mind instead." I state before stepping around him and sprinting towards where Huata and Hinto should be; after all, I know what his next question would be, and I didn't want to answer it just yet.

I arrive to see Hinto and Huata embracing each other, I walk forward silently as I stride over and sit next to them. When they break away they finally see me, and jump in slight surprise.

"When did you get there?" Hinto questions.

"What are you planning?" I ask as I stare at them. They both look to each other as if unsure to tell me something, but Huata eventually answers.

"Hinto and I have decided to take over the pack. He'll do plenty of training to make sure that this time he wins the battle." Huata responds as she looks to me in hope.

"Well in that case...... count me in!" I exclaim in happiness as I bound up and wag my tail slightly. They both look at me in surprise and confusion.

"So you're not going to tell Dasker?" Hinto questions in hope.

"Of course not, you two would be the perfect alphas, but I won't tell on one condition." I state as I look them in the eye.

"Name your terms." Hinto states. I look at them with a smirk on my lips before responding.

"I will be allowed to have pups as well.", I responded. They looked at me in extreme surprise before Huata questions,

"Who would you have puppies with though?"

"I believe Trots is the male she has her eyes on." Hinto states slyly as he looks at me in happiness.

"How'd you know?" I question, averting my eyes to the ground in embarrassment.

"Trot told me he was attracted to you but couldn't act on it seeing as he isn't the Alpha; but to answer your term, of course you can have pups, it would only help the pack so I see nothing wrong with that arrangement." Hinto explains. I'm so happy I jumped up and ran around them in eagerness.

"Calm down Ceska, we have to wait until Hinto takes leadership, then we can expand the pack, but for now let's head back before the others get ideas." Huata voices as she looks at me then Hinto. We both nod then jog back.

When we get back it's night time, and the others are getting ready to sleep. When we arrive Ash looks up and growls something about leaving without telling anyone, and almost waking Eric. I simply ignore her and walk over to Trot. He seems to be in a peaceful sleep, and it's just too perfect to resist.

I start to whack his tail with my paws before getting bored and simply tackling him. Trot jumps up in surprise, looking around until he spots me; I jump off him and run a little off into the forest, but he pounces at me, successfully pushing me to the ground. I flip over causing him to roll off me. We both stood up and circle each other before jumping and wrestling till one of us got the upper hand. So far I was winning.

At the end I stood over him while he was lying on his back; he suddenly kicked out my feet and turned over, causing me to be swept onto my back in one swift move. I look up to see Trot smirking in victory, before stepping off of me so I could get up, I look up at him before rubbing my head against his neck slightly.

After stepping away afterwards his face is confused, but then becomes understanding, he looks to me and back in the direction of the pack.

"Ceska, you know we can't have pups or anything like that; after all, Dasker's the Alpha, not me." Trot states in slight sadness and anger as he sits down, trying to deal with his emotions. I sit next to him close enough so that our fur is slightly rubbing against each other.

"I have a secret to tell you, but I can't tell you unless you promise not to tell anyone else." I emphasize as I look into his eyes.

"If it's that important, I promise I won't tell anyone else." Trot states as he touches my nose with his.

"Hinto is training to take on Dasker as Alpha." I state as I look away from him.

"Well if Hinto wins we still won't be allowed to be mates, only the alpha pair can be mates after all." Trot responds as he looks up in slight surprise.

"Yah, I know the rules, but I overheard their plan and said I wouldn't tell anyone if I could also have pups. They obviously agreed so when Hinto is Alpha I'll be allowed to have a mate and pups; so technically we only have to wait until Hinto becomes Alpha." I explained as I looked up to see if he was okay with it.

"Really?! That's amazing! We would have a large pack, plenty of offspring to continue; and we could be mates." he exclaims as he bounds around me, rubbing up against me.

I look at him and motion with my tail that we have to get back to the pack before Dasker and Anemy show up and wonder where we went and what we were doing. As we get back we lay a little away from the others, with our backs touching against each other's. That night we went to sleep thinking of the future ahead of us.

Ch.4 Ch.6

David Bowie: Don't Go

Imagine David Bowie falls in love with you the moment he meets you, but you're taken away; only for him to find you again after many years have passed: Warnings: Alludes to suicidal thoughts/ideation, abuse, abuse of power, feelings of worthlessness, injury, angst, apathy

1975

It was always loud around me, everyone shouting and screaming in my direction. Adoration emanated in their voices as they called my name, but all it made me feel was anxious and overwhelmed. I'm always running from them, these people that claim to love me... they lie when they say that, how can they love someone they do not know?

These manic strangers scared me, I never wanted to walk down the streets alone, but there were moments I would risk it simply for a second just to myself. I once thought of leaving this world, setting my soul free, abandoning this shell I am forced into. I was so close to going through with it, but then I met someone who forced a change in my perception.

We were young during our first meeting, I was several years into my stardom, usually caged up in my Los Angeles apartment. I hate Los Angeles, in fact, I hate California as a whole; the only reason I was even there was because my manager had forced me into this movie deal.

I wasn't unhappy with the movie, I had read the novel it was based on, and the script embraced a lot of the original elements. I couldn't survive there for long though, my mind was always leaving me, traveling elsewhere, to places with happy memories. The few moments of awareness during my day left me with an unending headache, it made me nauseous knowing that I was still alive. I felt like I was betraying God with these thoughts, that I was dishonoring him in some way with my destructive hatred for myself and my surroundings.

___

The first day on set was numbing, my manager had escorted me there, his firm glare setting me on edge; I know the only reason he was with me was to ensure that I didn't go against him. A deal with the Devil, he observed my every move, I felt like he was screening my thoughts before allowing me to speak.

I wanted to scream, to reach out to the people around me for help; but I didn't. I simply kept my eyes down, only speaking when the director or cast members addressed me directly.

The day was nearing its end, I had been encapsulated with this crowd and wanted a moment of quietness, I knew when I was back in that apartment that I would be yelled at. He would be angry that I seemed so disinterested in everything, furious that I had the audacity to try and come here without him.

I nervously skittered away from the people, moving swiftly towards the door as my heart rate raced. I was so close, it would only offer me momentary relief, but that was better than nothing, better than this everlasting flame that was burning me from the inside out. I felt cauterized from the heat, forever stuck in this flesh prison until my untimely death. Yet, death offers me no salvation, in this world of sin we are doomed to return, to relive these traumas until we learn something from this negative world.

One foot was out the door when a hand seized my wrist; had it been my neck, I'm sure I would think I was being strangled. A chilling shiver scraped along my spine, it was that uncomfortable feeling of knowing I was caught. The air in my lungs felt suffocating, the heat of my body sweltering as I glanced at the hand.

"Where do you think you're going?" I look sternly at my manager, surveying his aura and body language. I can tell that he is nearing the end of his rope, the 'patience' he has is running thin. I remember the first time I hired him, I thought he was respectable, he looked like a business man with his hair combed back with his immaculate suit, speaking to me with high revere.

Not many things have changed about him, he still speaks well of me - now only to possible clients or partners; his way of dressing has only gotten finer with the money I bring in, but the young man I hired was long gone. He's been my manager since I was 12 and he was 36, I'm now 19, him being 43. The full head of black hair is slightly graying at the sides, his athletic physique gave way to slight obesity - but the strange type of weight gain where he is top-heavy in the chest, if that makes sense.

He used to make me feel comfortable, he wouldn't yell or scream at me, but that was back when my parents were always around, as soon as I turned 18 they upped and left. They still sent me requests for money every now and then, well aware I would oblige. I know they likely think I wanted them to leave, but what I wouldn't give for them to come and stick their noses in my business.

"...I'm going to the bathroom?" My voice feels like it's grating against my throat, as though I haven't had a thing to drink all day; however, I know he wouldn't let me go a day without 8 glasses of water. That may sound like he actually cares for me, but he knows that my albums are the reason behind a lot of my wealth, and he refuses to let anything damage my voice.

The eye contact we hold burns me, I don't know what else to do but hope he believes me. I sigh in relief as he releases his hold, sending a curt 'get going' to me before turning away. I haven't felt happy in a long while, and though I know what I'm feeling isn't happiness, it still reminds me of it. I want to rush forward, but force a steady walk, going straight past the bathroom and outside.

The sun is obnoxiously bright, I want to go back inside, but I know he will be waiting for me. I shuffle over to the back of the building, a lonely bench awaiting, luckily sheltered away from the sweltering sun. My back aches as I collapse onto it, head falling back against the wall as I quietly groan in dissatisfaction. The traffic is loud, I can hear airplanes in the distance, and the footsteps of people along the sidewalk.

God, I wish I was somewhere else, I wish I was back home in Montana, or maybe at my seldom used cabin in Idaho. I want to not see another human being for miles, I want trees and wildlife to surround me as I write and draw, but I know that won't happen anytime soon.

The thoughts overrunning my mind lower my awareness of my surroundings, so much so that I only become aware again when someone sits next to me. The alarming aura of a person so near, this is the closest a stranger has been to me without my manager in sight; I can't remember how long ago it has been since I talked to someone without him watching me.

I observe them from the corner of my eye, he's taller than me, dressed in a casual black suit with a hat, his orange-blonde hair coaxing my attention. I know who he is, we were briskly introduced during the meeting, but he was surrounded by an entourage that kept people away from him.

He glances to me, our eyes meeting for an instant before I turn away from him. I'm not sure how to talk to him, it's been so long since I was able to speak freely that I fear I don't know how to anymore.

"So, what are you doing out here?" His accented tone rings out sharply, dancing through the noisy ambience, my head subconsciously tilting as I listen to him. Turning my face to him, I'm met by his piercing eyes paired with his angular face; I almost want to huff at how exact and fine his features are.

"I could ask you the same." I state, holding a steady gaze, watching as his eye flicker over me before returning ahead.

"I saw you leaving, and I wanted to know where you were going." He responds, voice smooth as he brushes his hair back neatly.

"So you followed me?" The sentence flows from my mouth so quickly, realizing what I've said makes me feel bilious. I gulp, looking over to him as I await a yell or a glare; surprised when he lets out an amused laugh.

"Don't make it weird." He giggles, looking down to his hands. He looks up to speak again, but a concerned look washes over his features.

"Are you alright? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable." The sentence strings along, his body shifting towards me as all his attention is focused on me. I'm confused at first, wondering why he was reacting like this before realizing I must look tense and pale.

"No, no, it's alright. It's not you." I quickly respond, resting a hand gently over his own to calm him down. I once again speak without thinking, not realizing I told him indirectly that I am in fact uncomfortable.

"So that's why you're out here." David states, his hands gently holding my own as his concerned expression magnifies. I pull my hands away in fear of the repercussions for this conversation.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I scowl, glaring at the wall opposite us. I hurriedly stand up, worried about staying out too long, I don't want my manager getting suspicious.

I squint my eyes against the weather, the sun burns as the heat overwhelms my sense. I want to cry, but I know that I can't allow myself to. David stands as well, and I'm about to walk away before feeling something being placed atop my head. Glancing over to David, I notice his hat missing, my sight no longer being hindered by the sunlight. I gaze at him in suspicion, what does he want?

"What?" Is all he says, a smirk playing on his features as he leads me back around the building to the front door. I try to give him his fedora back, but he simply pushed it back to me, telling me to keep it. I thank him, a smile trying to appear on my face as I look up to him; he grins to me before walking away, leaving me alone.

___

My manager was pissed, he knew I lied about going to bathroom, and was even angrier when he saw I had David Bowie's fedora clutched in my small hands. He snatches it from my hands, I open my mouth to argue, but the look on his face tells me it'll be much worse if I speak.

I follow him through the crowd, weaving carefully so that I don't touch people. We reach the group surrounding David, my manager saying we have something of his. As he walks towards us, my manager shoves the fedora into my hands before shoving me forward. I can tell David is confused by the situation, I hope he didn't see my manager push me.

"What is it (Y/N)?" This is the first time he's used my name, I don't know why it stunned me, maybe because no one cares enough to know my real name, instead calling me by my pseudonym. I nervously glance away and look back at my manager, I can tell he wants to yell at me, but he knows he has to wait.

"I-I'm returning your fedora, you must've dropped it..." I reply, hoping he goes along with it.

"What?" His bewildered response matches his expression, I don't know how to get him to go along other than to rephrase myself.

"I was coming back from the bathroom and saw it on the floor, you must've dropped it." I explain, looking him firmly in the eyes as I hold out the hat. His eyes now hold understanding as he glances behind me.

"Oh, thank you... Can I speak to you for a moment?" He responds, grabbing the hat and then my wrist to pull me forward. I yelp weakly, my wrist hurting from its past abuse. David glanced down at me in worry just as my manager moves forward and grabs my shoulder.

"We need to get going, you have another meeting in a half-hour." My manager interrupts, bundling me away before David could even blink. ___

My manager is fuming, I can tell by the slight jitter in is movements as he forces me out of the building and down the street. I know he wants nothing more than to yell at me, make me cry, but he will have to wait until we get some privacy before he can do as he pleases.

The car ride is anything but pleasant, he may have opened the door for me, but he shoved me in so fast that I knocked my head against the frame. The headache is splitting through my skull, the mixture of pain and internal agony is catching up with me.  My manager angrily slams his door and begins driving back to my apartment; he wastes no time laying into me.

"What the fuck was that!" He shouts angrily, fists clenching the steering wheel to the point I think he's fantasizing that it's my neck.

"What?" I try to play dumb, but I should've known better.

"Don't give me that bullshit! I know you didn't go to the bathroom, you snuck out so you could talk with that singer!" He states with a scowl, glaring at me before looking back to the road. I can see the sweat layered upon his brow, perhaps the sun is getting to him as well?

"I didn't!" My response is halted quickly, my manager reaching across the center console as he smacks me sharply. I want to say I'm surprised, but I'm not, though that does nothing to numb the stinging pain as tears burn my eyes.

"You wanna rethink that response." He grits, I can tell he's furious, and he'll do as he pleases no matter my answer. Involuntarily curling into myself, I make no move to respond, wrapping my arms tightly around my abdomen as I look out the window. My lack of response is only going to anger him further, but I can't seem to care anymore.

When we arrive at my apartment, he's tossing me in as soon as the doors unlocked. He pulls me back to him so harshly I can hear the fabric of my sweater tearing as he scrunches it in his fists. I subconsciously put my hands up, trying to get away from him.

He heeds my movements, shoving me away just as harshly as he had pulled me in. The action is so sudden that I'm thrown off balance, taking  a moment to recollect myself before turning back to him.

I go to say something, but have no time to contemplate my words as something is hurled at me. I try my best to dodge it, but my actions are in vain as the object meets my eye.

The left side of my face radiates in pain as I fall backwards into the wall, my hands flying up to my injury as I try not to cry. I look down at the object and see my favorite book was what had been thrown, Jane Eyre... my manager can't seem to get enough of ruining things I love.

I'm so caught up in my thoughts that I only notice my manager approaching when he already has his thick hand wrapped around my throat, thus pinning me to the wall I've taken solace in. He grabs my wrists with his free hand and forces them up and away from my face. 

I try to observe him as he analyzes my face, his once kind eyes seem so empty, when did that happen? His hair is thinner, and though he's out of shape, he still overpowers me with ease; who is this man before me? I want to look at him more, but the agony of my injury overpowers my wants, eyes stinging as the tears cloud my vision before streaming down along my cheeks.

"You'll need to cover that for tomorrow, I'll bring you a bandage."

Just like that, his hold is gone and he exits the apartment. I'm alone in this apartment, silence settling back into it as the furious tornado that is my manager has left the vicinity. If someone came in, they would think me strange curled up in the corner with tears in my eyes; no one ever sees who causes them, but they always have an opinion.

___

He did as he said, bringing me a roll of Coban with some gauze so I could pad my eye against the adhesive bandage. I hadn't look at my eye throughout the night, not wanting to see the damage, but knowing it must look bad as my eye had swollen shut. 

I wanted to assume the mirror was lying to me like everyone else does, but I know it wasn't.

The bruising was light as it hasn't been more than a day, the contusion will darken later on as it fully forms; the swelling wasn't as bad as I assumed, my eyelids were definitely swollen, but I could peel them open slightly to view the sclera flooded in red due to burst blood vessels. Brushing those thoughts away, my manager shoves open the bathroom door and grabs the bandages from my grasp, grumbling about me taking to long as he wraps my injuries.

The car ride there is a stark contrast compared to yesterday, the silence was almost more eerie than when he yells, but I try not to think to hard on it.

Anxiety bubbles up in my throat as he parks the car and exits, what will they say? This is opening the door to unwanted questions, what if they find out my manager abuses me? What if they take his side?? I don't get too much time to think as my door is opened by my manager as he signals for me to get out. I do as told, hesitantly walking into the building after he enters.

The building is thankfully not nearly as crowded as yesterday, today only requires the actors/actresses, costume designers, and music producers to be present. 

I stand there silently as I wait for the group to be called to focus, but I'm disrupted from daydreaming as I feel someone tap my shoulder. I turn around, coming face to face with the director, Nicolas Roeg.

"Hey Y/N, you're manager called yesterday and explained that you got injured while playing with your cousins. I know how head injuries can be, so let me know if you start getting headaches, or if the noise or environment gets too overwhelming. Alright?" This man, he was so nice over the phone when asking if I wanted to be a part of this project, how could I forget him, especially after how kind he's being now?

I grace him with a thankful smile, nodding my head. He smiles back, giving my shoulder a pat in reassurance before turning away and walking to converse with someone else. I am about to go back to dissociating when another tap is felt, I want to sigh, but halt my actions when I meet eyes - well, eye - with David Bowie.

I can tell he had his words prepared before walking over, but I feel like they abandoned him as soon as I turned around. I can only assume it has something to do with my lovely injury, I know for a fact that I alone cannot leave a man speechless.

"Darling, what happened?" He's concerned, that much was audible, but I know I need to make that dissipate if I don't want my manager to have a repeat of last night.

"Oh this... it's er, nothing, happened while I was rough housing with my cousins." My lie was almost seamless, but the hesitation in my words at the beginning was noticed by him, the squint in his eyes at my words gave that much away.

"I'm fine, honestly David, no need to worry about me." I voice, trying harder to get him to put this on the back burner. He's conflicted, eyes glinting with so many different emotions I can't seem to keep up. Luckily though, he bows his head slightly and nods at my words. I can tell he's still uncertain, but at least he's stopped talking about it. 

I didn't try to avoid him the rest of the day per say, but we were working on two very different parts of the film; he was the lead Actor, and I was working on the film scores as well as dabbling in the costume design. We weren't around each other very often, and if we were, they were but fleeting moments.

He had me cornered during our lunch break actually, but my manager put a quick stop to that, dragging me away to talk with some fans outside; at this point, I think he's doing everything in his power to keep David and myself separate.

The hours go by, Roeg and my manager keeping me plenty busy. I would say that I barely noticed my injury all day apart from the constant headaches and dull ache that seemed to keep building up the longer the day went on.

I know Roeg said to tell him when it was getting bad, but let's be honest, my manager would have my other eye if I said anything. 

As the day is coming to an end, people begin leaving, my manager says we can go after he uses the restroom. He fixes me with a hard look before going in, basically telling me,'do something stupid, and we'll have a rerun of last night.' His eyes looked so dark I felt a nervous chill run down my back as I took a step back.

"Y/N!" I hear a voice call, turning around to be met with that same fedora as yesterday.

"David..." I greet uneasily, glancing back to the restroom in fear my manager will walk out at anytime. David seems to catch on and speeds past the pleasantries.

"Listen, I'm going to the preview tonight if you'd like to join me, I can pick you up tonight if that's alright with you?" His offer is said with such a hopeful voice and sweet look that I almost agree right then and there, but then reality stabs me in the back.

"Y/N." That voice nearly startle me out of my skin with how hard I jumped. My shoulders turn stiff as I look back and watch as my manager stalks closer, gripping my shoulder before steering me to the door.I turn my head quickly, making eye contact with David and his crestfallen face, giving a smile with a slight head nod to confirm his plans. I watch for a second as joy encapsulates his face before I'm forced out the door into the obnoxious environment of Los Angeles.

My manager leaves early, stating he has a meeting to get to before the day ends, leaving me alone in my apartment. He usually stays gone until the morning, that of which I'm thankful for, or else I would never be able to have David pick me up. 

He arrives when it's already dark, around 7 pm when the last streaks of sunlight are dissipating. His driver goes to get out, but David beats him to it, walking over and opening the door for me before getting back in on his side. We both sit in the back and his chauffeur takes us to the movie theatre. It was a quiet ride, I think he could notice how jittery and uneasy I was; he held my hand and offered a comforting smile, reassuring me until we felt the car halt.

We sat in the back, hoping no one would notice our presence. The movie was good, it held my attention the whole time - well, at least until David nudged me, motioning with his head for us to leave. I do as told, standing and following him as he led me down the hallways and back into the main room.

"Whats wrong?" I ask, unsure why we left half-way through the film.

"Nothing, I just want to spend some time alone with you." He states, before grasping my hand, leading me outside and down the quiet sidewalks. Los Angeles at night is better at night I would say, a little more quiet with much better weather.

There is a hint of a breeze though, sending light shivers down my back whenever a gust came my way. My clothes aren't really the best for this weather, a knee length dress with only a feathery shawl to protect my shoulders.

"Oh, I'm sorry darling, I should've told you to bring a jacket." He voices guiltily, detaching our hands before shrugging off his suit jacket. He stops me from walking, grabbing my shoulders and turning me to face him as he wraps the large jacket around my thin frame.

It swallows me up, a blush tinting my cheeks in embarrassment, I must look ridiculous to this man. David notices the blush, a wide grin spreading over his face at how adorable the site before him is.

"I must look ridiculous..." I say, looking down self-consciously. David simply huffs and removes his hat and placing it delicately atop my head, it's much too large, sliding down over my eyes and blocking my sight. He laughs gently, angling the hat so that I can see again, his toothy grin being the first sight I'm met with.

"You look adorable." Is all he says, wrapping his arm comfortingly over my shoulders before continuing to walk us down the street. I can confidently state that my blush has not faded throughput the entire exchange.

We both remain silent, simply enjoying the presence of the other as we saunter down the pavement. We pass many quiet cafes still open, him stepping to the left and halting as he opens the door to a warm cafe. I cautiously enter, removing the hat and surveying the interior closely.

A young woman sits sleepily at the register, the only other people being a middle-aged couple at a table against the wall. The lights have a warm hue to them, complementing the earthy tones of the walls and tables.

Glancing back at David, he offers a soft smile, resting his hand on my lower back before leading me to the register. The woman quickly writes down my order, not looking up until both myself and David have ordered.

I hold my breath when I notice that familiar glint in her eye, backing up subconsciously in fear she will shout our names and alert someone to our presence. If the paparazzo found out I'm here, and accompanied by David Bowie no less! The scandal would be horrific.

David holds me steadily in comfort as he smiles at the woman, he holds a finger against his lips to stop her, I glance at her in worry that she still might scream. She looks overwhelmed in excitement, but breathes deeply to calm herself down when she notices my reaction.

"Sorry! I just love both of you so much!" She whispers happily, still in shock of meeting two of her favorite artists. I feel the tension in my shoulders lessen as she only whispers in excitement.

"Thank you, it's nice to meet you to." David says politely, nodding to her before leading me away and to a table cozied up in a corner.

Our night was wonderful, David and I talked the night away, enjoying multiple drinks the longer we stayed up. I've never felt so at ease with another person, and we could converse for an extended amount of time without awkward silences or uncomfortable glances; how could someone so wonderful seek me out for company? Is this a blessing from God, or is Satan about to take him away from me.

___

After that night, I've looked forward to seeing him everyday, a smile gracing both of our features whenever our eye(s) meet, but we are both swept away. My manager found out about my late night escapade rather easily seeing as I didn't return to my apartment and was instead brought to work by David(no nothing happened, I fell asleep during the car ride back, and David decided it would be easier to just take me to his home instead of go up into an apartment building while trying to find my keys).

My manager was thoroughly pissed, but his physical punishments still didn't deter me from seeing David, but he always did know how to ruin a good thing. The movie was over, it had already been in theatres and what we were attending wasn't required work anymore; my manager took full advantage of that, signing me up with another director to work with them on film scores.

This new job took me across the country into New York, the director was very well known, Martin Scorsese, and the film was Taxi... Taxi Driver I think. It sounded interesting I guess, maybe a little on point for it being called Taxi Driver and set in New York. 

I didn't even get to say goodbye to David, my manager had dropped the news on me the night before I was to fly to New York. I didn't have anyway to contact David, but I'm not even sure if he would want to stay in contact... Either way, I'm leaving tomorrow whether I like it or not.

_______

1982

It's been a little while since I've agreed to do another film score since Taxi Driver, that film was surprisingly fun compared to my last experience, but maybe that's because my manager wasn't there with me most of the time.

None of that matters anymore though, after the success of taxi driver I fired that abusive prick, and I honestly couldn't be happier. I focused solely on my albums and dropped 7 of them throughout the past few years. I took a break from movies, I was too young for them and the change of environment when I was 19, but now I'm 26 and feel ready to face the world.

I don't actually know a lot about this film, other than the title and one of the actors/film scorers. I believe the film is called Merry Christmas Mr. Lawrence? The actor/musician I'm talking about is Ryuichi Sakamoto, and he's honestly the main reason I took this job; my albums blew up and have been making me a fortune, so this is really just for fun and the experience.

I'm walking down the road, suitcase in hand, trying to figure out how the hell to walk in sand. I'm about halfway to the hotel when I hear someone approaching from my side. I don't turn to them, hoping they'll keep moving and we won't have to awkwardly introduce ourselves.

"...(Y/N)? Is that really you!" What? I.. I know that voice. I turn to them, eyes wide as I watch a face from the past stride over to me, face plastered with a wide grin.

"David?" At the sound of my voice, his strides turned into bounds pretty much, I could see he was truly ecstatic at seeing me, and it would be a lie to say I don't feel the same.

I start walking towards him, dropping my suitcase as we embrace. How could I not? This man, this wonderful man that changed me for the better, made me see that my life was worth more. You beautiful man, I'll never disappear again, I promise.

Simon Gruber: Am I Worth Anything?

Imagine being John McClane's youngest daughter, and running away to Germany after your parents start fighting again and your dad moves back to New York. What happens when Simon Gruber finds you on the streets:

-This is set after the second movie, but before the 3rd. I have the reader at age 12-

They'd started arguing again, everything was going so good too, Dad had moved here to LA and everything. I don't know what caused all of this, I thought they were happy, I thought everything was fixed... but I'm wrong as per usual.

Mom has us staying with her, but I'm honesty feeling so alone, even with my siblings around. They both are a few years older than me, so they either bully or ignore me, but neither is my friend. Dad was helping us figure this out, but that all went to waste after he left. They started being cold again, acting as if I don't exist. I know this separating is effecting them as well, but at least they have each other, I don't even have mom here to confide in since she's always working.

I try to call dad sometimes, but he's always drunk and usually thinks I'm mom, sometimes he doesn't even give me the chance to talk, just picks up the phone and starts cursing. He's never treated me like that before, sure, sometimes he just picks up the phone and responds that way before knowing it's me, but is that really an excuse? The separation must be hurting him as well... I wish I could help him, but I don't even know how to help myself. 

Sometime, late at night, I think about what occurred leading up to dad leaving. I remember them shouting at each other, trying to get my brother and sister to take sides. They choose mom either way, I just stood in-between, how could they make me choose? The looks of disdain coming from all sides made me wither, I felt hated, unwanted. Maybe things would be better if I leave?

_______

I left home, it may sound really stupid, but maybe things will be better if I stay at dad's for a little bit; surely things couldn't be worse than staying with my mother and siblings.

The train ride was costly and took around 3 days for me to arrive in New York; my packing was light, just my back pack with a few changes of clothing, all my savings, my ID, some food and a notepad and pen. I didn't want to pack to much because it would make it harder for me to slip out of the house unnoticed, so I just stuffed my backpack and went for it - I probably should've packed other things, but it's too late now.

New York was interesting, I was quite young when we moved to Los Angeles, so being back is a new experience. The buildings are tall and overbearing, they make you feel so small, and the crowded, busy sidewalks only emphasize that point. 

I pull out the map from my pocket, dotting what street I'm on, and then charting the best way to get to my father's apartment. His apartment is a bit away from the station, about 20ish blocks, but I've got enough daylight to make it before nightfall.

Before beginning my trek I pull out my walkman, restarting the CD, it's the Station to Station album by David Bowie - I hd to beg for a whole 2 months before my father finally gave in and bought me the walkman, he later gifted me this CD upon noticing how Bowie is my favorite musician. It's a nice reminder that my father cares for me, whenever I'm feeling lonely, I'll listen to this album.

I'm weaving my way through people, trying my best not to run into anyone. The sun seems to be setting a lot sooner than I thought it would, but that must be because of the time difference, I must've forgotten to account for that. Either way, I'm over half way there and the sun is just beginning to set, that last thing I want is to be caught after dark on the streets of New York - I especially don't want this as I am currently an unattended child.

I finally arrive at my fathers apartment, pressing the buzzer at the door, hoping he'll be home and let me in.

"Who is it?" I hear an annoyed voice answer, but I still sigh in relief.

"Dad?" My voice sounds so small, hopefully he still heard me.

"Y/N?" I don't know how to describe it, but it seems like so many emotions smashed into one word: relief, anger, happiness, anxiousness. So many that they overwhelm me.

"Yeah, it's me, can you let me in?" I don't get a verbal response, but hear the door being unlocked. I push open the heavy door, making my way inside the lobby. I head over to the elevator and push the up button, waiting patiently for the doors to open. I'm startled by the abrupt opening of the door from the stairwell, staring at the door as I watch my father come bustling out of it. He looks tense and rushed - a mess if I'm being honest, looking around quickly before stilling when he spots me. 

His movements are fast, he catches me off guard when he pulls me in unexpectedly for a tight hug. I'm surprised, but accept the contact, it's been so long since I've seen my father after all. As he holds me, I can't help but smell the alcohol on him, though I know mentioning it could be disastrous.

We separate and head into the now awaiting elevator, the ride up was quick but surprisingly quiet; I expected some sort of conversation, but maybe he's processing? The walk from the elevator to his apartment felt uncomfortably tense though, like something suddenly angered him. Either way, it made me feel uneasy.

As soon as I enter, I go to speak, but am cut off by the harsh slamming of the door.

"What the hell do you think you're doing!" He questions in a raised voice, he's angry, that much I can tell.

"I-" I begin to respond, but have no time as I am immediately cut off.

"Leaving without telling your mother, wandering the streets of New York at night! How the hell did you even get here from LA, no airline would let you board unattended?"

"I-I used the amtrak." I explain in a shaky voice, averting my eyes from his gaze and staring down at the dirty floor.

"What were you even thinking? Coming over here?" His voice is solemn now, and it makes me more uncomfortable than when he was yelling.

"I thought that... maybe I could stay here for a while?" I respond sheepishly, but hoping - no, praying - that he'll let me stay.

"Stay? Here, with me?" He questions incredulously.

"Please?" I whisper, glancing at him hopefully.

"What? No, you can't stay with me." He looks at me like I'm crazy, I suddenly feel very out of place, like I can't find anywhere that I'm allowed to exist. It's an astounding experience, especially when I've always felt so comfortable with my father.

"But..." I begin, trailing off as I try to think of what to say.

"But what? Don't tell me, you thought you could leave your mother and come live with me, that it would be as easy as showing up on my doorstep unannounced?" I can tell he's making fun of me, his tone gives it away.

"I-" I begin once again, only this time I'm interrupted.

"Well it's not! I thought you were smarter than that? You're going back to your mother's first thing tomorrow, you understand?" His shouting is scary, he's never acted like this towards me, though I have seen a few interactions like this between him and my mother.

"Dad, no, I want to stay here!" I all but beg, wide eyed at his words.

"I don't want you staying here, I don't want you anywhere near here!" My hearing goes silent after that, but there's an obnoxious ringing... Did he just say that? That he wants nothing to do with me, that he doesn't want me anywhere near him?

He says a few more things, but I don't care enough to hear them, all I can manage to do is stare straight forward in a daze. I travelled so far, but not even my father wants me around anymore.

I was right, I should've just disappeared; I'm the catalyst of every fight, had I never been born, maybe they would still be together?

I don't remember much that happened after, just my father rolling his eyes as he drags his palm tiredly over his face. He walks me to the spare bedroom and tell me to get some rest, but I don't think I'll be able to sleep after the words we traded.

I'm not quite sure how long I lay in that bed before I hear my father talking from the living room, I tiptoe out of bed and look through the cracked door, he seems to be on the phone.

"You think I wanted her here! Listen Holly, I'm sending her back on the train tomorrow, alright? Make sure she doesn't comeback to New York." He sounds tired, annoyed, upset... I guess he really doesn't want me here, but I know my mother doesn't want me either.

I wait until my father's all but drunk himself to death, it's around 0100 in the morning before he's passed out on the couch, empty bottles on the coffee table. I cling tightly onto my backpack, walking to the front door as quietly as possible, opening the door slowly before sliding into the hallway and closing it with a dull 'click.'

The ride down was eerie, and it became even more so when I exited the apartment building. The darkness enveloping New York made the environment look quite scary, especially with only the light from the full moon and some blinking lamp posts to light my way. There was still some people out walking, most were either drunk or homeless, so I tried to pass by silently and unnoticed; my goal is to reach the airport before sunrise and buy a ticket out of the country, anywhere as long as it's not here.

I would've preferred to hail a taxi, but I can't risk not having the funds to afford a ticket, though neither of my parents want me, they still have an obligation to find me. Since I'll be paying for the flight in cash, there'll be no tracking where I went, unless the person selling me the ticket remembers my name, face, and flight destination; but I highly doubt they'll check the airports first.

When I finally arrive, the sun is just beginning to raise above the horizon, the streets are getting a little more busy with 6am traffic, and there is now light foot traffic along the sidewalks. 

I was coming up on the airport, I can tell because the planes kept getting louder and louder. I'd been thinking during my entire walk on where I wanted to go, it would be suspicious for a 12 year old to ask what flights are available to anywhere, especially without an adult present. 

I've chosen to go to Germany because I've always loved the language and have wanted to visit since I was 5; I've also formulated a story should I be asked any questions. I'm going to say that I'll be visiting family in Cochem, Germany. I remember reading about that beautiful place in a travel magazine, it looked nice enough and I also can't remember any other place. If they want more info, I'll say I'm specifically visiting my Uncle who lives there, that I'll be staying there for the summer. They shouldn't be asking much after that though, so I should be all good.

I push open the terminal doors, and immediately locate the booth where you can purchase a ticket. The lady behind the desk looks nice, she sounds polite as she finishes up talking with another employee before turning to me. She looks a little surprised to see just me, but she quickly recovers.

"Hello, how can I help you?" She questions sweetly.

"Hi there, I was wondering if you have any flights today heading over to Cochem, Germany?" I respond, I try to sound mature, but I'm not sure if it worked as I notice her raise her eyebrow humorously.

"Well, let me check real quick." She clicks a few times on her computer, tilting her head as she shuffles.

"There aren't any flights to Cochem since they don't have an airport." She states.

"What does that mean?" I ask, scrunching my eyebrows as I think my plan may be ruined.

"It just means we find the closest airport to their, and that looks to be Frankfurt Hahn Airport; it's only about 15 miles away." She states nonchalantly, but I'm sighing internally. 15 miles, after how long of a flight? I'll need to get a map too if I don't want to get lost.

"We have a flight leaving at around 0900 with a few seat openings." She continues, showing me the available seats.

"Alright, that works." I state, handing her the cash for the ticket, waiting as she prints it out and hands it to me. I smile in thanks before wandering off to check in and head to my boarding area, I've got a while before my flight, so I guess I'll make myself comfortable.

I don't remember the flight too well, I mainly slept through the flight, having sparse moments of wakefulness when they brought us food and drinks. The people I was seated beside were a kindly older couple, they kept me company and checked in on me; I think they just saw a child alone on the flight and wanted to make sure I wasn't scared or anything.

They would try to talk with me, but I think they realized how tired I was and just let me sleep. They were rather nice, even walking with me off the plane before they separated to go to baggage claim; I didn't need to as I only had my carry-on.

I quickly bought a map from the convenience shop in the airport before heading off on my trek, its around 5am and the sun has yet to rise. The temperature is around 60ºF, so I'm not too cold, I actually welcome the chill as the movement will warm me up in no time.

_______

I've been in Cochem for around 3 weeks now, and I must say that I really should have thought this through. I swapped all my USD over into euros, but I barely have enough to afford food everyday, not to mention I have no place to stay, hotels are far to expensive to even think of. Learning german has also been more complicated than I thought, I assumed it would be easier since I'm immersed in the culture, but it's all just been one big shock for both my body and mind.

Some of the shop owners have started to recognize me; I think they have their assumptions and know I'm homeless, sometimes they'll give me something to eat free of charge. I also can't risk speaking to them in english, I can't risk anyone knowing I'm from the United States, that would only heighten their suspicion on why I'm here instead of in the US. So, for the time being, I'll just have to come off as mute until I learn the language.

_______

It's been a particularly harsh past few days, the temperature has been dropping lower than usual, and my deteriorating clothes haven't been doing much to conserve my body heat. The local children have also taken to terrorizing me, I think they've been making fun of my clothing and muteness (I am now able to mostly understand them after some tutoring from a friendly shop owner).

Sometimes, they'll try to grab my bag, I've had a group of them chase after me just because I wouldn't let them steal my backpack. Their parents either don't notice or don't care, either way, I'm on my own.

They haven't caught me yet, and I can't say what they would do to me if they did. Would they just grab my bag and leave? Or would they want to hurt me for having the audacity to run? Maybe they just chase me because they find it funny, or maybe I have good reason to evade them?

It was actually during one of these chases that I ran into the man that would come to replace my father over time.

It was routine at this point, a group of 6 or so kids would spot me and give chase, I would see them coming and take off.  So far so good, I'm dodging the adults that go on with their lives, trying not to get hit by cars as I sprint across the road.

I'm doing really good actually, I turn around to catch a glimpse of them, they got stopped at the road by passing traffic, yes!

I look forward just as I turn a corner, running straight into someone, they are larger than me, barely being affected by the collision. I, however, had toppled down to the ground , scraping up my palms on the ground as the flail out to catch me.

Tears well in my eyes at the stinging pain, I can feel as the grit and dirt dig into the wounds as they rub against the cobblestone. I quickly glance up and see a tall man with short blonde hair, his eyes are a striking blue; they make me think of my father's eyes, how his aren't as striking as this man's.

I observe his expression, his eyes widen only slightly, showing his surprise about being barreled into so unexpectedly. He looks very professional in what I can best describe as a business casual suit, but something about him makes him seem like more than what he shows. This strange man, he holds an air of authority, power, I could almost describe him as threatening.

My thoughts are drawn away by the trampled footsteps behind me. I quickly scramble up from the floor, ignoring the pain in my hands as I snap my gaze to the corner I had rounded. I look just as the others come around, they halt as well at the sight of me and this adult. 

I lock eyes with the groups leader and immediately begin sprinting down the road, I can hear them giving chase immediately, shouting that no one cares enough about me to help. The tears already welled up in my eyes begin to cascade down my face; they're right, not even my own family wanted, how could I expect that strangers from a different country would want me either?

In my moments of self-pity, I step into a crevice, I was unprepared for the change in level and feel my knee giving out. I tumble to the ground in a flurry, scraping my limbs against the harsh ground. I curse at myself, attempting to stand, but this fall may have done me in, my legs feel like they are on fire, and my left ankle feels heavy and stiff, as though it was being strangled.

Looking up, I notice that I've fallen in a rather secluded area of town, almost no foot traffic here at all, so these miscreants will have a field day, I wonder what they'll actually do now that they've finally caught me.

They surround me, two of them ripping my backpack from me despite my struggle to keep hold of it. The leader marches forward and shoves me, allowing them to grab the bag away. They unzip it before turning it upside down, shaking everything out onto the floor.

We watch as clothes, food, paper and pens tumble out. They look disappointed when nothing else appears, what were they expecting, cash? As if I have any left...

The leader and his lackeys roughly lift me from the ground, having to hold me up since my legs have stopped functioning. Just as they're about to speak, a stern voice erupts from behind them.

"Aufhören (Stop)." They all freeze, the boys looking back to see who interrupted them. I look as well, though it took a lot of effort.

There, standing imposingly a few steps away is the man with the blue eyes, I ran into him, what is he doing stopping these boys from hurting me?

"Was (What)?" The leader questions, he tries to sound stern as well, but I can see him shrinking away when the man steps closer.

"Verpisst euch, lauft zu euren Müttern (Fuck off, go run to your mothers)." He growls in a deep tone, I can feel the disgust in his voice when speaking to these boys. 

They apparently don't need to be told twice, they release me, allowing me to crumple to the floor as they bolt away in the opposite direction. I feel dazed after everything that happened, but looking down at the ground, I can't help but feel despair swelling in my throat. Among the content of my bag was a picture of me and my parents, they're smiling and happy, and so was I. That was our last photo together before the fighting started again.

I reach out and grab the crumpled photograph, gently bringing it up so I could cradle it. I glance at the stranger as he steps closer before kneeling down. I'm not sure what I was expecting, but it wasn't for him to begin collecting my belongings and putting them back into my bag. 

I can tell he has his suspicions upon viewing my dirty clothing, the toothpaste and toothbrush, as well as the bits of old food wrapped up for later. He finishes zipping up the bag before gently placing it in front of me.

"Wo ist deine Mutter? Dein Vater (Where is your mother? Your father)?" He questions with a concerned tone, I glance into his eyes before quickly looking away. He's very intimidating, even when he's being so nice.

"Weg (Gone)." I reply solemnly. My parents may not be dead, but I don't plan on ever going back, they're better off without me.

"Nun, wer ist für Sie zuständig (Well, who is responsible for you)?" He asks again, hoping that someone is out there looking after me. I sadly, can't give him that answer, it would be wrong to lie to the man who saved me.

"Nur ich (Only me)." I respond, avoiding eye contact at all costs. I'm terrified, what if he turns me into the authorities, or puts me in an orphanage? Or worse, what if he takes me back to New York! 

"Nur Sie? Hier draußen (Just you? Out here)?" He sounds shocked, his eyebrows scrunch up in worry, a distant look appearing in his eyes. He tilts his head in thought, of what, I'm unsure. He stands abruptly, and I'm sure he's going to leave, allow me to be alone again; but I'm the shocked one now when I notice his outstretched his hand.

I analyze it for a few seconds, wondering whether I should accept it, what happens if I do accept it? Is this a mere action of kindness before leaving me, or will this lead to more actions occurring? So many questions in my head silenced when I reach out and place my hand in his, allowing his firm grip to pull me off the floor. 

My legs are still regaining their senses, but he supports me as I try to remember how to stand. I look down at my legs and notice the scrapes and cuts along them, mostly localized around my knees as they are what I fell on during my tumble. I shift my gaze up to my hands, they are so small against his,  knuckles scraped and bleeding from sliding against the ground.

I tilt my head at them, so many injuries in such a short span of time, how will I fix them? I don't have any bandages on me, and I certainly can't afford to buy any.

"Komm, ich bringe das in Ordnung (Come on, I'll fix it)." I just nod my head, who am I to rebuke against his orders, especially after how he's treated me?

"Wie ist Ihr Name (What is your name)?" My words are slow as I try to remember what to say, I am doing better at understanding what is being said, but have trouble speaking the language. I can see the man raise an eyebrow, I almost think he won't answer me.

" Simon. Und du (Simon. And you)?" He states, walking with me through the town market, grasping my hand tighter when he notices the group of boys that had been terrorizing me cross the street.

"Y/N." I respond quietly, it's almost a whisper. It's been so long since I've spoken, let alone this much; I haven't said my name once during my stay here, so it's a strange feeling.

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After that day, Simon took me in, cleaned my wounds and bandaged them, gave me a hot meal to eat, and a room to rest in.

He unofficially adopted me after a year, explaining to me that I'm like a daughter to him, and that he want me to see him as my father. He didn't have to ask though, I've seen him as my father since the day we first met.

The first months were hard if I'm being honest, I had no idea how to act around a father figure, especially not after what happened with my actual dad. I was a lot more skittish, scared of maintaining eye contact, terrified by the slightest raise in his voice. Those behaviors began to melt away when I realized he wouldn't push me away, that he actually invited my company and tried to do things that I enjoyed - such as painting with me, or taking me into nature so I could write poems in the serene environment.

He asked me quite early on who my parents were and what happened. I was afraid that if he knew they were alive, that he would send me back to them; but I never was able to lie to him. I told him the truth about my parents, who they were, why I ran away, etc. He talked to me about it, and actually explained to me the dark history between his brother and my father.

He was empathetic towards me, explaining that he had similar feelings of displacement when he was staying with his family; it felt good having someone that could relate to me. He would reassure me during times of self-hatred, comforting me, stating that I was never the problem, that my parents should've never made me feel that way. He promised me that he will never allow them to treat me like that again.

The adoption was a quiet affair, he had documents for me falsified so that it stated I was a German citizen that he adopted out of the orphanage.

Yes, I know they were falsified, and I know all about his side of business; he told me the night beforehand what type of person he was, as well as the types of jobs he does. I'll admit, he caught me off guard since he's quite amiable, but I suppose everyone has sides that no one understands.

Some of his close friends that he works with were there to witness my adoption, they were polite and friendly as well. I had never felt more accepted in my life than I did when I was with Simo–my father, and I don't plan on ever letting go of this feeling. 

Nesmyslná Realita(Czech)

Bylo brzy ve čtvrtek ráno, když dostala strašlivou zprávu, že její manžel je mrtvý.

Přemýšlela, proč se včera večer nevrátil domů, dokonce čekal u telefonu, nakonec mu zavolal, ale nikdy nedostal odpověď.

Ona právě odešel její děti, Lisette a Alonso, dolů své dlouhé příjezdové cestě na autobus čeká, tiše mává na rozloučenou, jak to hlučně odjel, nakonec nechal její úsměv a ruce na podzim, jak autobus vyjel ven z pohledu. Otočil se zpátky domů pěšky ona si uvědomila, že ptáci byli velice potichu, abnormálně takže, to dělalo mlčení nepříjemné, jak ona byla v pasti s její neustálé myšlenky, ani hračka chrastící spadané listí bylo tak hlasité jako obvykle. Uhladila černá pletená vlasy na stranu, než tahat neklidně na rukávech její modro-šedý svetr, pevně objala rukama kolem jejího těla, když začala chodit zpátky domů, bedlivě poslouchat křupání pod boty, její mysl stále bloudí zmatení v tom, kde její manžel, Ryker, byl. Pár kroků od ní na verandě, ona zpomalila její chůze, když uslyšela zvuk auta, její kroky nejisté mírně otočila, odhalující stand-out černé a bílé vzor Belmont, Ohio policejní auto řidičský směrem k ní. Oslnění čelního skla z šedé oblohy znemožnilo vidět, kdo řídil, takže si nebyla jistá, zda se cítí nadšená nebo rozrušená překvapivým vzhledem.

Čím blíž to jel rychleji její srdeční tep, přičemž mělčí dechy, když sledovala auto vytáhnout na zastávku pár metrů daleko. Její ruce se podvědomě ždímaly, když čekala, až se dveře auta otevřou, najednou se cítila nepříjemně horká, i když to bylo docela chladno. Věděla, že nebezpečí její manžel byl v důsledku jeho práci, a věděl, že by mohl být zabit nebo zraněn na jakékoliv výzvy; ale nic, co by ji připravit pro sklíčený pohled na důstojníky obličej jako on vystoupil z auta.

Ryker byl na telefonu se svým partnerem pro vloupání v rezidenční zóně, trestní šel vzadu a zaoblený dům přijít za nimi, jak oni šli se dostat přes rozbité dveře, střelba oba několikrát do zad před spuštěním. Policie v současné době hledá pro něj, ale jen dva svědky, kteří zahlédli ho, jak začal poprsí otevřít své dveře, a soused, který viděl, co se děje a zavolal policii.

Jako důstojník vysvětlil, co se stalo její mysl šel prázdný, již tlumit hluk z lesa zcela mizí a že nepříjemné teplo náhle mizí, takže její tělo, ne pocit, prázdné. Ona rychle zjistila, že je nucen vrátit se do reality, když důstojník měl dotknout jejího ramene, nebylo to neslušné, nebo nežádoucí, protože tento důstojník byl dobří přátelé s sebou a Ryker, ale náhlé a nečekané, kontaktujte ji šokovalo natolik, aby blbec rameno pryč a vzít krok zpět. Okamžitě stáhl ruku, jeho pohled svržený dolů k podlaze, zatímco ona svítila lítostivý pohled, když si uvědomila své činy.

Nakonec řekla: "Je mi to líto, jen se cítím v tuto chvíli trochu ohromen."Její hlas nesměle tichý, mírné koktání, když se snaží pochopit a ovládat všechny emoce náhle běží přes ni. Pohled na pochopení se mu omývá přes obličej, než slavnostně přikývne hlavou a otočí se zpět k autu, "sbohem smutno."Carter promluvil a nabídl krátký, smutný úsměv, než vstoupil do svého auta a odjel.

Tam bylo mnoho myšlenek v Saden hlavu, všechny zprávy, ne bít ji ještě plně. S její mysl racing se pomalu jí, jak se jí do domů kabiny, zamykání dveří, než odpočívá čelo tvrdě proti mořené dřevo, dávat sebe chvilku klidu před tlačení off a míří do telefonu, aby se pár telefonátů.

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Dům je tmavý, vydávat nepříjemný a zmatek aura, slunce nemá ještě zvýšil a žádné světlo v okolí, ale tady je chlapec s jeho školní uniformu a batoh na tiše zavřel dveře. Začne chodit pryč z jeho domu rychle, nervózní atmosféra kolem něj pomalu pohlcovat další dostal, jeho napjatá ramena a na okraji podívejte oslabení jednoduše mírné paranoie.

Má jizvu nad okem, její poněkud červená barva je zřejmá proti jeho bledé kůži. Dostal tuto jizvu ve stejnou dobu, kdy ztratil svou matku a nevlastní sestru, autonehoda byla brutální, jen on a jeden z ostatních cestujících automobilů přežili.

On odstíny jeho oči pryč od oslepující světla, že projít každý tak často, jak chodí po chodníku, jeho paranoia mizí čím blíže se blíží Bingham je Rybník. Najde místo daleko od silnice a položí tašku dolů, když pozoruje spící labutě a kachny. Malý úsměv milosti jeho rysy, jak on si pamatuje, když on a jeho matka, Liz, by sem přišel brzy ráno mluvit a dívat se na východ slunce před školou; jeho úsměv mizí stejně rychle, jak přišla až si uvědomí, že může jen přijít sám. Vždycky mohl požádat svého nevlastního otce Aleca, aby šel s ním, ale obával se jakékoli odpovědi, kterou Alec dal, zvláště teď, když byl jediný, kdo přežil autonehodu.

Ve snaze setřást své myšlenky pryč od minulosti se podívá zpět na labutě a obdivuje jejich krásu proti temné vodě. Prvních pár slunečních paprsků začne zářit proti matné obloze, mírný vánek způsobuje, že se třese, protože nemá jednotnou bundu, protože to stojí peníze navíc. Jak on si sedne a opře o strom a on se zamračil na bolest vzplanutí v zádech, než se otřepat a vytáhl tašku se k němu, odepnout zmrazení kovu a sáhl dovnitř, vytáhl složku obsahující nedokončené úkoly; mnoho z nich mělo hrudky a slzy, i když je držel úhledně ve složce. Uvolňuje unavený a podrážděný povzdech začal pracovat, počínaje jeho názvem,'Archer Carlisle', jeho studené ruce, takže je těžší psát a podívat zhoršení záblesky v jeho očích, když ví, že nebude mít všechny tyto úkoly, než školy; strach náplň něm při pomyšlení, že by museli říct Alec o špatnou známku, i když jeho nedokončené a roztrhané úkol byl Alec je chyba. S dalším povzdechem se vrátil do práce a snažil se co nejrychleji a co nejpřesněji dokončit co nejvíce.

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Už je to týden, co jsem řekl o jeho smrti, už jsem věděl, že jsem nemohl zůstat v našem pohodlném Ohio domů, zejména od Ryker to postavil, jen chodit do dveří způsobil nechutný pocit, že mytí nade mnou s vědomím, že jsem ho nikdy neuvidím.

Pohřeb byl včera odpoledne... Černé šaty, které jsem nosil, jsou nyní hromada šedého popela v ohništi. Moje dcera Lisette šla se mnou, byl větrný den s posypeme déšť utírání prachu země mimo; zdá se, že svět byl ještě truchlí nad ztrátou, ale to je asi jen mnou uvedení významu do jednoduché věci. Můj syn Alonso využil smrti svého otce velmi těžké, já vím, jak blízko byli, a vidět můj syn pláče udělal slzu prorazit můj fasády síly, ale musel jsem rychle otřete ji pryč, když jsem objal mou plačící syn. Jeho výkřiky trvaly hodinu, Lisette začala plakat také,když viděla, jak se Alova třesoucí forma utěšuje mou. Tu noc jsem s nimi zůstal v jejich pokoji, seděl na koberci mezi jejich dvěma postelemi, jedna ruka uchopila v každém z mých, když jsem jim vyprávěl příběhy, aby je ukolébali ke spánku. Když jsem věděl, že spí, i nadále držet za ruce, opřel hlavu o dřevěnou zeď, když jsem zíral na strop, světlo z měsíce vytváří stíny větví stromů proti protější stěně. Prostě jsem tam seděl a přemýšlel o hovorech, které jsem udělal v den, kdy jsem obdržel zprávy; do příštího týdne bude to, co zbylo z mé rodiny, v naší skotské chalupě, daleko od něj.

Ještě musím dětem říct, že nevím, jak jim říct, že se vzdalujeme od všeho, co nám připomíná jejich otce. Mohu jen doufat, že mě za toto rozhodnutí nebudou pohrdat, ale jen pobyt v tomto domě způsobí, že moje mysl bloudí směrem, kterým si nedovolím jít.

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Zazvoní zvonek hlasitě, jak jsem spěchat do zavírací dveře mé třídy, podíval se po místnosti, vidím, že všichni již sedí a učitel pozoruje mě ostře. Snižování můj pohled, jsem narovnat svůj domácí úkol a zase-v neslavně skončil stránek do koše, než courání kolem mého stolu učitele dosáhnout svého sedadla, aby se zabránilo jeho a všichni ostatní, je dívat se na všechny časy.

Vím, že bych neměla být strach o moji učitelé, ale Pan Curraigh má stejný přísný hlas jako Alec, a nemůžu si pomoct, ale být nervózní, kdykoliv vkročím do své třídy; jeho přísná pravidla a zastrašující postavu nemám zrovna mi pomoct, když se snaží odlišit dva.

Pan Curraigh pohledy z jeho počítače na mě, jsem polknout nervózně a zamíchat mírně v mé místo jsem se podíval dolů na papír jsem opatrně umístil na můj stůl. Třída je klidné klábosení měli opět několik okamžiků před lety, ale byl rychle zastaven znovu, když Pan Curraigh tlačil jeho šikmá obrázek z jeho psací stůl a neuspěchaný strided do přední části třídy.

"Pane Carlisle, chcete třídě vysvětlit, proč jste přišel pozdě? Znovu."Jeho nonšalantní první věta značně kontrastovala s jeho tvrdým vyslovením "znovu". Podvědomě jsem sklonil hlavu, když třída mlčí, jiné třídy by se mohly chichotat,ale vědí, že se v této třídě nemají šroubovat.

Zavrtěl jsem hlavou "ne", aniž bych plně důvěřoval svému hlasu, aby odpověděl bez koktání.

"Neslyším tě Archere. Vysvětlíte třídě, proč jste přišli pozdě."Jeho ostrý, akcentovaný hlas zazvonil proti klidu a nezanechal prostor, aby se vyhnul jeho otázce. Vím, že se na mě dívá, když čeká na svou odpověď. Konečně se na něj dívám a tiše odpovídám, když můj pohled neustále bliká mezi ním a stropem.

"Zaspal jsem, pane, nedovolím, aby se to stalo znovu."Snažil jsem se představit klidnou tvář, abych mu snad zabránil v tom, aby mě znovu zavolal, moje mysl uvnitř řve myšlenkami na to, zda přijme omluvu nebo ne. Vteřina projde, než se vrátí na tabuli a začne psát, všichni ji rychle zkopírují do svých notebooků, konverzace zdánlivě zapomenutá. Tušení, obav i nadále kobylka v hlavě, že věděl, že moje omluva byla falešná, ale neměl jsem čas to dát nějaké rozjímání, jak už jsem byl pozadu na poznámky, a mé nedávné zranění zápěstí není zrovna mě přínosem.

Třída konečně skončila, většina lidí byla sbalena a čekala u dveří na zvonek, jen pár lidí sedělo u svých stolů. I zastrčit přiřazené domácí úkoly do jejich složky, umístění můj notebook v mé tašce, jakož. Sáhnu po složce, když ji nejprve uchopí další ruka, ruka patřící žádnému studentovi. Jsem pokukovat očí před rychle při pohledu dolů na stůl, to byl Pan Curraigh, který držel můj domácí úkol složku, opíral se o stůl, jak on prolistoval nyní otevřete složku.

"Víte, vaše organizace a péče se nesčítají, když odevzdáte roztrhané papíry."Uvádí, jak pomalu zavírá složku a drží ji, abych ji vzal, což rychle sleduji, tiše ji vložím do tašky.

"Chcete mi říct skutečný důvod, proč se zdá, že jste vždy pozdě?"Pan Curraigh otázky, jeho normálně hlasitý a přísný hlas nyní tišší a obsahující náznak obav. Bylo to pár okamžiků a já jsem ještě reagovat, když se ozve,

"Archere, pokud máte skutečný důvod, proč jste pozdě, chápu, ale nemohu přijmout tyto falešné výmluvy už. Tohle je už 10. čas, kdy jsi přišel pozdě. Pokud mi Nemůžete dát skutečný důvod, musím vás zadržet."Jeho hlas byl nikdy velmi přísný nebo krutý celé věty, které mají spíše varovný tón, ale můžu sebrat jako odpověď je, aby se neklidně zavrtěla hlavou "ne", když se podívám nahoru, aby se setkala s jeho pohledem. Pan Curraigh se prostě na chvíli těší, než uvolní podrážděný povzdech a odtáhne ze stolu.

"Přijď pozdě na zadržení, Pane Carlisle."Je vše, co říká, než se vrátí ke svému stolu, zazvoní zvonek a studenti spěchají ze dveří, já okamžitě následuji, abych nepřišel pozdě na další lekci. Moje myšlenky na zbytek dne jsou zahaleny tím, jak Alec bude reagovat, když se vrátím domů pozdě, jak bude reagovat, když mu řeknu, že jsem znovu zadržen. Hrůza bazény v mé hrudi, takže se cítí pevně a vzduch dusí, jak jsem se plahočit přes den.

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První den v našem novém domově to byla chalupa, kterou vlastnili rodiče a kterou jsem zdědil. Daleko od Ohia, daleko od Ryker, celou cestu v Glasgow, Skotsko, který se nachází v pěkné oblasti s lolling zelených polí a kamenné zdi úhledně obklopující ji.

Lisette a Alonso vzali tento krok lépe, než jsem očekával, zdálo by se, že chtěli utéct stejně jako já. Zavolal jsem dopředu, abych se ujistil, že chata je připravena, když jsme dorazili, a přítel mých rodičů přichází sledovat mé děti, protože musím co nejdříve jít do své práce. Spěchám z domu, rychle obejmu přítele a rychle uvedu čas, kdy budu doma, než přejdu k mému pronajatému vozidlu Volkswagen. Moje tašky popruh kroucení, když se snažím umístit vše v autě, rychle jsem strčit ji do sedadla spolujezdce před nastavením zrcátka a míří do mé nové práci.

Šedé mraky vrhající se po obloze mi připomínají hodně domova, ale toto rušné město je přesně to, co potřebuji, abych se dostal pryč od mého života v malém městě. Jízda na levé straně je však docela zvláštní, něco, na co si někteří zvyknou.

Když vjíždím na parkoviště, všimnu si, že škola se blíží ke konci dne, doufám, že mě nevyhodí, než vůbec začnu. Rychle klopýtal přes dveře kanceláře, jsem narovnat držení těla a tričko, než chodit na recepci a uvádějící, jsem nový učitel. Žena se usmívá, než někomu zavolá, předpokládám, že ředitel nebo možná jiný učitel.

Po čekání na asi 2 minuty, kancelář dveře hlasitě žádá otevřít, vysoký muž s hustými světle hnědými vlasy a zastrašující postavy pokroky, dává malé kývnutí na ženu předtím, než se ke mně blíží. Vstávám a potřásám mu nabídnutou rukou.

"Ahoj, Jsem pan Curriagh nebo Aric, jsem tu, abych vás doprovodil do vaší třídy."Jeho hlas má silný přízvuk, něco, co si teď budu muset zvyknout, protože žiji ve Skotsku. Zdá se, že jeho zastrašující postoj kontrastuje s přátelským úsměvem, který nabízí.

"Rád vás poznávám, Aricu, jsem smutný."Zdvořile odpovím, než mu dovolím, aby mě vyvedl z kanceláře a na chodbě.

"Takže vy jste nový učitel vědy?"Hlasuje v mírné zvědavosti a pokračuje v navigaci po prázdných halách.

"Ano, co učíte?"Ptám se, chůze rychleji držet krok s jeho svižným tempem.

"Oh já? Vždycky jsem byl literární člověk."Jeho odpověď způsobuje, že se objeví malý úsměv, skutečnost, že lidé zde jsou tak milí a příjemní, je něco, co zbožňuji. Zastavíme se po další chvíli chůze.

"No, tohle je vaše třída, i když jste dorazili trochu pozdě."Vysvětluje, když sledujeme studenty, jak si balí tašky. Uvolňuji tichý povzdech, samozřejmě bych zmeškal celý první den své práce.

"Nebojte se, že ztratíte svou třídu, můžete se připojit, abyste pomohli s zadržením nebo prozkoumali důvody."Aric říká, když bliká oči z okna ke mně, Chystám se reagovat, když zvon zazvoní hlasitě, ozvěna prázdnými sály, než se dveře učebny otevřou a studenti se vypustí. Oba stojí u okna do třídy do haly tichý zase dolů, jen několik studentů, stojící kolem, zatímco někteří jsou právě teď dokončuji balení.

Aric se ke mně otočí, když se jeho pohled otočí k něčemu za mnou, jeho náhlý výkřik mě překvapí a rychle se otočím, abych viděl viníka.

Mladý chlapec s tmavě hnědými vlasy, okamžitě se zastaví, jeho oči jít široký být křičel na, ruku zpřísnění svých držet kolem jeho kniha tiskla proti jeho hrudi.

"Lukostřelec. Zadržení je v opačném směru."Aric uvádí, jak chodí ke studentovi. Očekával bych, že každý student bude nervózní, když bude povolán učitelem, ale tento student, Archer, vypadal vyloženě vyděšeně.

Než Archer bude schopen reagovat, Aric začne znovu mluvit. "Je to podruhé, co jste se pokusil vynechat vazbu, Archere."Dává mírný zlom, když čeká na odpověď, poté, co neobdržel žádnou, nechal si povzdechnout podrážděním, než řekl: "Pojď se mnou Archer."Začínám chodit zpátky ke mně, Archer vleče pár kroků za sebou s očima vyškolenými na podlaze.

"Je mi líto, že jsem zkrátil vaše turné, ale musím doprovodit tohoto studenta do vazby."Aric uvádí, jak se dívá zpět k Archerovi.

"Docela v pořádku Aricu, můžu jít s tebou? Přece jen mi chyběl první den."Ptám se, podíval se na Archera, jeho oči se po celou dobu nepohybovaly z podlahy. Aric krátce přikývne hlavou, než povede cestu k zadržení. Rychle sleduji, snažím se držet krok, poslouchám, jak Aric popisuje části školy, kterou procházíme.

------

Kdo je ta osoba? Je to nová učitelka? Řekla, že tu zmeškala první den, a náš nový učitel vědy se nemohl ukázat.

Zvedám hlavu nahoru, oči se na ni na chvíli dívají, když přemýšlím, zda bych se měl zeptat nebo ne. Nakonec se vzdávám zvědavosti a ptám se: "jste nový učitel vědy?"Zdá se, že moje otázka je oba vyleká z jejich malého rozhovoru, pan Curraigh nyní mlčí, když čekám na její odpověď. Otočí se ke mně a nabídne přátelský úsměv, než odpoví: "Ano, To jsem já, můžete mi říkat paní Monroe."Její odpověď je pěkné, ale krátké, a její hlas zdálo se, váhat trochu, když řekla, že její příjmení, což způsobuje hlavu naklonit někdy tak trochu ve zmatku na její nechuť mluvit její příjmení.

"Ráda vás poznávám, paní Monroeová, jmenuji se Archer."Odpovídám, můj hlas vypadá sebevědoměji a hlasitěji než můj normální tón, i když to sotva přemýšlím. Ten čas, co zbylo z chůze do vazby, strávil jsem ho mluvit s Paní Monroe, nevím proč, ale zdálo se, že jednodušší mluvit s, to by mohlo být z její non-zastrašující postoj a výšku, nebo možná, že mi připomínala mou matku, z nichž oba jsou věrohodné.

Mluvili jsme o knize, kterou jsem držel, když se pan Curraigh zastavil, místnost, ve které se zadržuje, je přímo před námi. Jsem oslovit chytit rukojeť, na okamžik zapomněl na moje zranění zápěstí, až jsem se uvolnit grunt bolesti, okamžitě tahá mě za zápěstí zpátky a držel ji na mé hrudi, jako krutá svíravá bolest, která zaplavila mé systém, který mi připomněl včera.

Jak Pan Curraigh a Paní Monroe se zdají šokováni, že můj náhlý výbuch bolesti, Paní Monroe je o něco říct, ale já nemám čas přemýšlet, klopýtal pozpátku jsem zase mírně a utéct. Jsem na jediné místo, kde se cítím v bezpečí, Blízkost Rybníka, nebo Labutí Rybník, jak říkávala moje matka; jen připomenout, že způsobuje vlny úzkosti zamést přes mé tělo, všechny tyto věci, které se pořád děje jsou příliš zdrcující. První jsem ztratil moje matka a sestra při autonehodě, pak můj nevlastní otec(který už mi nelíbilo) viní mě za to, a teď mám učitele, který mi připomíná přesně to, moje matka, já prostě nevím, jak se mám cítit, nebo reagovat na tyto situace. Jsem tak zaujatý těmito plodnými myšlenkami a bolestivou bolestí, že neslyším kroky, které se ke mně blíží. Byla to náhlá ruka na rameni, která mě překvapila přítomností jiné osoby. Rychle otočím hlavu očekávám, že uvidím rozzlobeného pana Curraigh nebo možná Aleca, ale místo toho se setkávám se smutným úsměvem paní Monroeové, když se krčí vedle mě. Natáhl jsem ruku na zápěstí, odhodil jsem se, ale po další vteřině jí dovolím vidět mé zápěstí, ignorující možný důsledek, že by mohla pochybovat o tom, jak jsem utrpěl toto zranění.

Bylo to mírné rozšíření jejích očí, které způsobilo, že jsem sledoval její pohled, rozhodl jsem se nikdy se podívat na mé zranění, takže když jsem viděl, jak moje zápěstí oteklé a pohmožděné způsobuje, že se mé oči také rozšířily. Lehce se dotkne mého zápěstí a já se okamžitě odtáhnu, bolest mi hoří rukou. Zdá se, že tam sedí v okamžiku přemýšlení, jako by přemýšlela o tom, co by měla říct.

"Lukostřelec. Jak se to stalo?"Tam to bylo, jediná věc, kterou jsem nechtěl slyšet. Jsem zavrtěla hlavou a dívat se jinam, teprve teď si uvědomil, že pár měl slzy stékaly po mé tváři, rychle otřel s mou volnou rukou. Neslyším odpověď na mé odmítnutí, takže se dívám zpět, když vidím, jak paní Monroe zadržuje slzy, i když proč, nevím. Kroutí hlavou, tlačí se z podlahy a natáhne ruku pro mě, kterou pomalu beru. Teď stojím oprášil jsem se svou dobrou rukou, volně drží svůj batoh, když čekám na její otázky.

Vše, co dělá, je, zdánlivě potřást hlavou k sobě, před motivací, abych ji následoval. Ona mě vede zpět do školy, nikdy mluvit nebo dívat se na mě, jen zíral dopředu, téměř empaticky. Vezme mě do lékařské místnosti a řekne mi, abych počkal u dveří, když odchází, aby si promluvila se sestrou. Zajímalo by mě, co říká, má podezření, že můj nevlastní otec způsobil tato zranění? Nebo si myslí, že mi to udělal jiný student? Měl bych prostě běžet, dokud mám ještě šanci? Moje myšlenky jsou náhle zastaveny, jak paní Monroe a sestra chodí ke mně, moje nervozita kope do jiné osoby, která je nyní přítomna.

Pokusil jsem se to dávat pozor na odlesk ups bolesti jako zdravotní sestra zabalené moje zápěstí ledový sáček, mrazu, což mi třást jako počasí venku už bylo chladno. Po několika minutách třešničkou mé zápěstí, že přináší kompresní obvaz, příjemná přetáčení zápěstí a ruky, bolest se zmenšila, ale udržuje stabilní bolest, která obklopuje celou moji ruku. Když skončí, dává mi pokyny k tomu denně, a poznámka pro třídu, protože to byla moje psací ruka.

Chůze ke dveřím, jsem na místě Paní Monroe čeká, její přátelský úsměv nahrazen vážný a přísný pohled, ten, který dělá moje kroky trochu více váhají. Opouštíme med místnost a vyjít do klidné, pusté chodby, její tvář stále vážné, jak jsme oba zastavit.

"Jak jste se k tomu zranění Archer."Nebyla to otázka, ale něco, co vyžadovalo odpověď, kterou jsem se velmi zdráhal dát. Rybaření svou tvář od ní jsem zavrtěla hlavou "ne", znovu, nechtěl jí říct pravdu, moje mysl řvala, že to by mohlo způsobit více bolesti, než dobrý, že i kdyby to udělala, věř mi, nikdo jiný.

"Archere, pokud mi to neřekneš, budu muset říct kanceláři, aby zavolala tvému otci."Ona říká, její hlas ztrácí některé z toho je přísnost, když se snaží přimět mě, abych odpověděl.

Když slyším její volání Alec můj táta způsobuje, že všechny tyto pocity prostě explodují, můj hněv volně proudí a nemohu si pomoci, ale chaoticky reagovat, "není to můj táta!"Můj výkřik se ozývá po chodbě, ticho, které zůstalo v jeho brázdě, je nepříjemné, všechno to hněvem poháněné sebevědomí rychle opouští mé tělo, když vydechuji. Není hloupá, přijde na to, co se děje, odvezou mě z domova, posledního místa, které mi připomíná mámu a sestru.

Zdá se, že její postoj ztuhne po vyslechnutí mé odpovědi, Mohu jen doufat, že se nebude zlobit na můj výbuch.

"Zeptám se tě ještě jednou. Kdo to udělal."Její hlas byl smrtelně tichý, druhá věta byla tvrdě vyhlášena a nezanechala prostor pro výmluvy. Konečně jsem její tvář, i když moje hlava je stále snížena, oči blikání se k ní každý tak často, jak jsem přemýšlet, co jsem chtěl říct.

"....Aleku."Můj hlas prakticky šepot, i když vím, že to slyšela, a věděl, že někdo jiný si je vědom tohoto tajemství, jen mě nutí cítit... zranitelný.

Series

Unraveled(Broadchurch):

Ch.1: Introductions

Ch.2: Unhappy Ellie

Ch.3: The Family

Ch.4: Reacquainting

Ch.5: Tough Times

Ch.6: I Fucking Hate Reporters

Ch.7: Frustration

Ch.8: Dull

Ch.9 IDK WTF IS HAPPENING

Balto's Sister:

Ch.1: The Big Race

Ch.2: Steele

Ch.3: Concerned

Ch.4 DISCONTINUED

Feral Pride:

Ch.1: Before and Now

Ch.2: Pack Placements

Ch.3: The Hunter and the Hunted

Ch.4: An Encounter with Death

Ch.5: Secrets for the Future

Ch.6: DISCONTINUED

Scar's Adopted Brother(Lion King):

Ch.1: Life as Little Brother

Ch.2: Fight for Leadership

Ch.3: New Rivals

Ch.4: Eavesdropper

Ch.5: Untrustworthy

Ch.6: Foreboding

Ch.7 DISCONTINUED

The Elder Maximoff:

Ch.1: Hail Hydra

Ch.2: Captain America

Ch.3: The Meeting

Ch.4: Intimidation

Ch.5: More than a Confrontation

Ch.6: Safe House

Ch.7: Seoul

Ch.8: The Cradle

Ch.9: The Vision

Ch.10: DISCONTINUED

Woodland Princess(The Hobbit):

Ch.1: A Journey Begins

Ch.2: The Company

Ch.3: The Conversation

Ch.4: The Adventure Begins

Ch.5: Confrontation

Ch.6: Expected

Ch.7: Turn of Events

Ch.8: The Great Chase

Ch.9: Memories

Ch.10: DISCONTINUED

Ch.2: Pack Placements

Ch.1 Ch.3

I try to get up after he's off me, but he quickly growls a warning to stay down; I don't listen and try to get up only to be pushed down by the alpha. I growl at him in frustration and anger before I bite his paw, causing him to hop up in surprise and jump off me; allowing me to try to get up again.

I'm quite weak however, and can barely stand up after wasting all that energy that I required to go hunting for food with. If I'm not accepted into his pack I could die of starvation, dehydration, or of having another animal kill me while I'm in my weakest state. I might even accept being an omega if it means I'll survive long enough to gain energy and kick his arrogant ass.

The alpha turns away and starts to converse with the oldest of the females. I sigh and try to get up again, but he left a few deep gashes in my sides that I didn't realize were there until the adrenaline wore off. So I simply lay there waiting to see if he might still allow me to join his pack after my attack. The white wolf walks over to me, looking down at me in gratitude.

"Here, let me help you." She says as she pushes me up and allows me to lean my weight on her. She walks me over to an area slightly away from the pack where she then lets me sit. I see her looking around. I wonder what she's looking for, but then she picks up a couple of dandelions. I look at her strangely, but her face says 'trust me', so I simply allow her to walk up to me.

"This might freak you out a little bit." She voices before placing a dandelion on each of my wounds, which then proceed to disappear as if I was never injured, there was however light scars on my side from where the alpha raked his claws; but at least the wounds are gone as well as the pain.

"My name's Huata, I just wanted to thank you for having my back over there." She says as she gestures to when she was getting attacked due to her unwise attempt to be friendly.

"My name's Ceska, and thanks for healing my wounds; it would've taken ages for them to heal naturally." I respond as I get up and start walking slowly back to the pack, Huata follows me closely. Seems like I actually have managed to meet a wolf that isn't arrogant or annoying, what a surprise; this is probably my first friend I've made. Well she seems happy as well, she must not be popular in her family; well, at least we have each other now.

As we make our way back, the alpha is greeting the young blonde wolf, which I assume is Huata's sister; well, she looks like a bitch is all I can say. The alpha looks up from greeting her, and growls deeply at me, I return the favor by relaying a louder growl while baring my teeth. The reddish tan wolf looks up and growls at me, I snarl in return which causes him to bare his teeth at me. He lunges but I easily sidestep and pin him to the ground. The alpha and a gray wolf drag me off him and hold me down while I'm scraping holes in the earth as I try to attack the red wolf. He gets up and looks at me in fear, slight anger, and disgust.

"What should we do with her alpha? I asked the oldest female if she was with them, but she was just as surprised as we were when she showed up." He questions as he looks up at his alpha.

The alpha allows me up, but not before giving me a warning growl to not attack. For once I listened, but only because I still wanted to kind of be accepted into his pack.

"She is a strong female Trot, and she could be useful in hunting and battles, but if she gets out of place....", he growls at the end before stalking away, followed by the gray wolf. I turn around to see the wolf known as Trot watching me; I growls at him before stalking off to find Huata. At least I have a friend now. Hopefully she'll continue to be my friend since I know no one else will be.

As I walk up to Huata I see her talking with the black wolf, Hinto, I believe his name was.

"Hi Huata", I address her as I sit beside her.

"Hey Ceska, I'd like you to meet Hinto, he tried to help me before you came into the fight." Huata informed me as I looked at him. He looked friendly, but at the same time he looked dangerous. I think we'll stay as acquaintances. We simply nodded at each other after Huata introduced us.

Dasker allowed me into his pack as a warrior and hunter, sadly Huata is an omega, and Hinto was demoted to lower than omega due to him challenging Dasker to protect Huata. I'll have to challenge him later, when I win I'll make sure to promote Hinto and Huata.

It's night time, and Anemy, Huata's sister, is attacking Huata; sadly Huata does nothing seeing as that would then bring more pain, I however will not allow my only friend get bossed around. I jump forward and tear Anemy off of Huata; ohh how pissed she looked. She even tried to bite me but I threw her into a tree and helped Huata up. She looked at me in gratitude as we walked off and chilled with Hinto. They got into a conversation about what being an omega means for the pack. I suddenly heard them start talking about proving their worth by finding a huge meal. They say they'll go in the cover of night, so I should hear when they go to leave, so I can follow them.

I return to see the pack getting ready to sleep. Kilo seems to be insulting Trot on how he's no longer beta. Trot seems to get offended at Kilo's statement and starts to growl in anger; Trot actually doesn't seem too bad now. He's just sensitive and reserved, he actually seems nice to be around.

"He's right, I've been replaced, I'm unworthy." Trot says in despair as he lays down. I walk out from behind the bushes, and start walking closer to him. He looks up and growls in anger as he remembers our fight earlier. I look at him in a friendly way as I wave my tail slightly, and walk up to him. To say he was surprised is an understatement, he looked beyond surprised and confused at that moment where I showed kindness to him, especially after how we almost got into a fight.

"Hi, I believe we got off on the wrong paw... My name is Ceska." I say hesitantly as I look at him.

"Trot, but I'm sure you already knew that." He replies.

"Listen I'm sorry for attacking your alpha, but he was attacking my friend who unknowingly disrespected him. Come on, how do you expect a human raised wolf to react, they know nothing of pack life...... and I'm also kind of sorry for attacking you. At that moment I wasn't thinking straight, I was overly aggressive, and should've been thinking more. I actually think you're pretty sweet, and nice." I explain as I look at him.

"It's okay, I was fighting my alphas battles, not to mention I should've expected you to be aggressive, after all you did just get attacked by our alpha, I should've been more considerate." He replies as he looks at me in understanding. I look at him in happiness, I just made another surprising friend, and he was even one I got in a fight with. I didn't think it was possible.

"Mind if I stay over here with you. I'm not really a favorite of anybody else, and Hinto and Huata are already asleep so I don't want to wake them. Of course that is only if you're okay with it; I wouldn't want to be intruding." I stated as I stood slightly uncomfortable. He simply looked at me and smiled.

"Of course you can stay over here, you're my friend now, so I don't exactly mind." He replies as he motions to the spot next to him. I walk over a lay down a few inches apart, which is a friendly spacing between two wolves who aren't mates, so as to not make him feel uncomfortable. We both drift off into sleep.

Ch.1 Ch.3