Hey Look, I Did A Thing.... NTAMW

Hey look, I did a thing.... NTAMW…

Never trust a man who insists on punishing you for your crimes, real or imagined, with sex acts.

Why did I cheat?  

I cheated to feel a private victory over him. I didn’t want to actually hurt him; he wasn’t ever supposed to ever find out.  It was my secret; just my little reminder that not everyone shared his opinion of me.  Even if that was just because they didn’t know me well enough to see all my ugly bits as he did.

I cheated to feel better about myself. They told me I was irresistible, funny, and interesting. That he was a fool for neglecting me. They flattered me to get what they wanted. I knew that, but pretended like they were pining for the woman they couldn't actually have. It inflated me temporarily, which was enough some days to prevent me from killing myself.

I cheated to distract myself and have something to look forward to. My meets ups were never near as exciting as the planning and build up. A little adrenaline to supplement the cortisol. Good substitute for the old s and d, right? Right.

I cheated to detach myself further.  Meaningless sex made me colder, cynical, unfeeling. Heartless. You would be amazed what you can endure when nothing matters.

I cheated to survive. That's not an excuse. That is a statement.

This hurt.

Trigger warning: Breakfast

While there is a whole lot of sadness associated with the decision I had to make, there is not one ounce of regret. I made the right decision.

This is what a real, qualified OBGYN will tell you about what women feel when they get an abortion

Dr. Willie Parker, who is trained as a gynecologist and OBGYN, is a hero for the pro-choice movement because he’s honest about the undiscussed aspects of getting (or not getting) an abortion. Watch how he gives a consultation.

You are so strong❤️

There are many days where I do not feel strong at all.  But I try to remember that I got up every time he knocked me down, and that I am still alive.  That counts for something.

Thank you for reaching out.  You are strong too.

I've been reblogging too much lately but this is a good one.

I saw this on facebook and honestly yeah