Some Nights He Would Wake Me Up Multiple Times Telling Me I Was Snoring.

Some nights he would wake me up multiple times telling me I was snoring.

I do snore. But a few times he did it while I was still awake. He thought i was sleeping and wanted a reason to wake and shame me.

Today in Review

Me: I have a lot of work to get done today, and people are depending on me. Oh shoot, I have two appointments that will interrupt my day too. I should probably get started.

Brain: Maybe you should panic and do nothing for four hours instead.

Me: ... well, no, if I plan and start n....

Brain: PANIC AND DO NOTHING FOR FOUR HOURS!!!

I'm certain he has someone.

I wonder how much he uses his time with me to torture her.

I bet he's always suspicious and checking her phone, and tells her he can't help that he can't trust; his ex was such a whore.

I bet he screams and throws things at her when she brings up something he does that hurts or bothers her. He's sorry, but he can't help it; his ex was a bitch and she just said something like his ex would say.

I bet he calls her as stupid as his ex when she forgets something.

I bet he's hit her when something is out of place. His ex couldn't be trusted to be responsible or keep house properly, and he doesn't want to live with a pig again.

On the other hand, I'm sure he's told her that he was practically addicted to sex with his ex. It would just be a coincidence that he'd bring these things up when she's not in the mood or doesn't want to do a specific sex act.

I'm sure he's mentioned that his ex made great food when she's burned dinner or made something he didn't like. Or worse, when she didn't feel like cooking.

I'm sure that he's mentioned how dutiful his ex was with the housework when she wants to go do something fun or socialize.

I'm sure his ex's agreeableness (code for: door mat) has come up when she's feeling vulnerable and jealous about the strippers and other women he flirts with.

I'm sure I, his ex, am a very useful manipulation tool.

I get hugs all day from my partner now. ESPECIALLY when I dont think I deserve one.

My humanity ebbing away.

“Can I have a hug?”

“What makes you think you deserve one?”

My safety net was there and I had help and support.  That’s why I am safe now.

Some survivors are not so lucky.  Please help this person if you can.

May 8, 2021 (CW for abuse)

This is still my situation at home, with my partner.

For those who don’t know me, I’m Miriam. I’m 22. I’m a mostly-closeted trans woman in an abusive relationship. I’m trying to scrape together some funds to safely leave. A friend started a PayPal pool for me at the beginning of the year and I made this blog. Since then I’ve made some preparations, talked to a counselor, and I may have a temporary place to stay if I’m able to leave.

So, I could still use more help. Lack of money and a social safety net around me are what’s holding me back the most now. My car, despite my best efforts, is on its deathbed. At this point it would cost about as much to fix it as it’d be to scrap it and just buy another one. I still have medical bills piled up. I’d like to save up for staying somewhere more permanently someday. I’d still like to start taking steps to transition once I’m in a better place. I’d like to feel safe.

I’ll leave a link to the PayPal pool. Anything helps, including reblogs. You can donate anonymously and without having a PayPal account.

paypal.me

Miriam's escape fund

(Updated 8/5/21) Hi, I’m Miriam and I’m a trans woman trying to safely remove myself from a physically abusive relationship. I would appreci

Tagging some blogs in hopes for this to gain some traction, but no pressure. Thank you all. ❤️

@trans-mom @bihet-dragonize @ndiecity @girlfriendluvr @lezzyharpy @thebibliosphere @justsomeantifas​​ @one-time-i-dreamt​ @lesbonic-ebonics​ @closet-keys​ @socialistexan @peetbools @butchniqabi @omegaverse @bill-nye-official-blog