Funky-brainedwhaletransgender - Funky-brained Whale Trans - Tumblr Blog

Dans la soupe- weird local expression in my area for being in eliminated in a game and made to sit in the middle of the circle and I’m pretty sure it’s just people in my city who use it and that it comes from French daycares.

See also soup of shame/souprifice, specific to the bilingual theatre camps I work at developed as micro expressions by us returning camp councillors based on a literal translation slowly spreading through local French and English school theatre programs participants attending the camp are also part of. Note that these preteens should not be considered a highly reliable source as most of them are quite prone to hyperbole and might interpret "I talked about it with a friend in the school play once and we started making jokes about being carrots when we get out in the theatre game" as widespread adaptation and report it as such.

That said, is there a linguist out there who can explain what this phenomenon would be? A highly local expression getting an inside joke translation potentially being adopted by the dominant and dominated linguistic groups in a highly bilingual area with a lessening degree of tension between linguistic communities seems like a thing someone would have studied somewhere before. Like I dunno but it seems like this might be interesting to someone who knows more about linguistics than me. If we pretend my sketchy observations are accurate, what’s going on here? Is there a word for it? Is this common in bilingual communities?

soup de jour: soup of the day

soup de jure: soup the government wants you to eat

soup de facto: the soup everyone actually eats

The new alphabet song

I am working on a playlist. A wonderful, awful playlist. The goal is to design the playlist that is as irritating as possible to the broadest possible range of music listeners. For example, though I am fond of quite a broad range of jazz styles there will most certainly be jazz included specifically for those folks who find it annoying. I would like as many suggestions for songs and genres that you personally strongly dislike or that you have noticed other people tend to dislike as possible. DMs are open if you have music you are ashamed to admit publicly that you have listened to.

I am currently trying to find:

The worst metal music you have ever heard

The worst hip-hop music you have ever heard

The worst country music you have ever heard

The worst classical music you have ever heard

Something you find deeply unsettling or that inspires genuine fear

Especially if this particular piece of music is considered terrible by many fans of the genre.

But anything you have ever hated is very much appreciated.

Here is a sneak peek at some of the bad things I plan to do:

Pick a song to play four times in a row, play another song, then play it two more times

Follow metal music with whale sounds

Play The Final Countdown at random intervals

4 minutes and 33 seconds

Sandwich an upbeat jazz piece between two white noise tracks that are no shorter than six minutes

Lowercase music

Some songs that make a lot of people cry followed by something with heavy synthesizer and/or hard rock

Christian rock

Follow calming ambient music with something loud. What sort of loud thing is as yet undecided

Christmas music. I’m currently considering something off Julie Andrew’s Christmas album as well as something off the Barenaked Ladies holiday album and perhaps a third other thing

WAP

Bird calls

If I succeed it will be unsuitable for all audiences.

This list includes doctors in the United States, Australia, Canada, and Europe!

Even if you're not the target demographic, please share for any of your friends who may be.

And if you or someone you know would like to be added to the list, there's a place for that!

I am working on a playlist. A wonderful, awful playlist. The goal is to design the playlist that is as irritating as possible to the broadest possible range of music listeners. For example, though I am fond of quite a broad range of jazz styles there will most certainly be jazz included specifically for those folks who find it annoying. I would like as many suggestions for songs and genres that you personally strongly dislike or that you have noticed other people tend to dislike as possible. DMs are open if you have music you are ashamed to admit publicly that you have listened to.

I am currently trying to find:

The worst metal music you have ever heard

The worst hip-hop music you have ever heard

The worst country music you have ever heard

The worst classical music you have ever heard

Something you find deeply unsettling or that inspires genuine fear

Especially if this particular piece of music is considered terrible by many fans of the genre.

But anything you have ever hated is very much appreciated.

Here is a sneak peek at some of the bad things I plan to do:

Pick a song to play four times in a row, play another song, then play it two more times

Follow metal music with whale sounds

Play The Final Countdown at random intervals

4 minutes and 33 seconds

Sandwich an upbeat jazz piece between two white noise tracks that are no shorter than six minutes

Lowercase music

Some songs that make a lot of people cry followed by something with heavy synthesizer and/or hard rock

Christian rock

Follow calming ambient music with something loud. What sort of loud thing is as yet undecided

Christmas music. I’m currently considering something off Julie Andrew’s Christmas album as well as something off the Barenaked Ladies holiday album and perhaps a third other thing

WAP

Bird calls

If I succeed it will be unsuitable for all audiences.

I’m feminine like the girl from The Ring and masculine like Mr. Rogers but most of all I’m queer like Gonzo the Great launching himself out of a cannon. Final girl scream coming out the mouth of Samwise Gamgee but mainly just felt with an attitude. Feminine rage and girlhood terror radiating from a man who couldn’t intimidate bunny rabbit with muppet-esque chaotic queerness.

This is how I feel my gender in my spleen (the organ I arbitrarily decided my gender identity comes from) but to anyone who asks I’m a trans guy who comes off as really gay.

I’ve got this thing where people don’t notice my autistic strangeness because they’re so freaked out by my evident queerness. "I don’t know what this is and the longer I can keep it talking about whales the longer I have to figure this out." I guess I have confusion privilege?

I looked through the shop and there is some very cool stuff. I didn’t realize you could make chainmail trans and I am happier in life knowing this. Also a really wide variety of pronoun pins. They have not only neopronoun options but some with pronoun sets that include neos and other pronouns. I’ve never seen a they/it or she/fae pronoun pin anywhere else. If it was in the budget I would buy everything in the shop with a trans flag on it. It’s all stunning.

My little online shop is no longer just me!

We've put up two new artists, Meika, my bestie's embroidered patches:

And Prince-S, professional chainmail worker:

At in-person markets we have 7+ artists on our tables. This is just a small portion of the collective, but I'm excited to show y'all a couple of them! www.QueerForQueer.com

Queer For Queer is an collective of 18 queer artists (as of writing this), but we're growing quick! We're in Comox Valley on Vancouver Island, Canada. The online shop ships anywhere :) This is the first time artists other than just me, @jojo-oliver, are selling on our online shop. I want to offer accessible and diverse pride merchandise made by other queer people. These are small artists I have foraged for in the wilderness and know personally. We need your support growing this, so please share!!

Okay so gender is socially constructed and some of us decided that it wasn’t enough so we constructed queerness to defy, nuance and tailor the social construction of gender. We have been very intentionally working and reworking this queerness we constructed since we laid the foundation. I think that intentionality of the process of building the concept of queerness is odd. We regularly, through less than ideal means unfortunately because we have a bad habit of yelling at each other about it, redefine transness amongst ourselves. Ask the first people who identified as transsexual what that identity meant to them and you will get a wildly different answer than you would get from your average modern day trans kid. We are weirdly self aware about this process. I mean. Not totally. Obviously. But in comparison to straight people who are typically mind blown when the 13 year old nonbinary child of someone they graduated with explains to them that gender is a social construct we are hyper conscious of how we’re talking about our genders and attractions. Spend some time scrolling through old asexual forums. Watch the four hour video essay YouTuber X made about respectability politics and transmedicalism. Straight people generally put less thought into being straight over the course of their entire lives than a gay teen spent thinking about gayness in the month following the realization that they’re not straight. This level of intentional consideration going into the development of this social construct is weird, right?

I will be thinking more about why we do this (probably as a way to defend our existence and because queerness in its current form has only really gained traction in this recent age of science and philosophy where we think about everything more but that’s its own thought soup to cook) and what effect this intentionality has on our community and society at large. Are there benefits to this method of social construction? Harms? Are other concepts being socially constructed in a similar way right now? In the past?

Anyone have thoughts on this? Sources? Has someone else already done this thinking for me that you’re familiar with? Strategies for sleeping when your brain won’t shut up about your gay ponderings?

legit the best advice i can give you: feed your friends

any time someone is in any kind of crisis or upheaval, offer to feed them. tell them they don’t have to choose what it is if they can’t make decisions, just ask about allergies and preferences and tell them you’re just gonna make food happen at their house.

friend having a baby? delivery gift certificate to order food to the hospital after the kid shows up.

someone’s relative passes away? offer to make them dinner.

buddy gets laid off? ask if you can order them lunch.

pal stuck in a depressive episode? offer to drive them to fucking mcdonalds, if that’s what they want.

people in crisis are tired and sad and angry and the last thing most of them are doing is thinking about feeding themselves. so if you have the ability or time or money, providing that is always, always a good move.

legit i do this all the time, and it is 100% always appreciated. i have taught all my friends that when something happens, we feed each other. it makes people feel extremely cared for, and I cannot recommend it enough.

transmasculinity and lesbianism are lovers. - design by us.

this print is available for purchase on our CafePress shop:

https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.cafepress.com%2Fshop%2FEquinoxian%2Fproducts%3FdesignId%3D136194414&t=MjFlNmJmZDAxNmIxMmQ2NWE2MTg2NzJiMjc5ZTg0NDcwYzdkYmRhOSw5YzVlYmQ1ZGJhN2VmYzFjZGIwNzZiZWM5ZGYxMjk3ZjE0MGQ4MGY4&ts=1729300084

Okay so existential dread is a significant element of my existence but every so often I experience a moment of existential joy.

You ever just look at your dog and go wow. That there is a dog. That dog is a living, breathing creature outside of me. He is a living creature and sometimes when we’re snuggled up I can feel his heartbeat and if I listen I can hear him breathing and he radiates warmth. And it just fills you with absolute joy like this thing has free will and is choosing to fall asleep laying on my back with his head on my butt and he only understands like ten of the thousands of words I say to him and it must feel so different to live in his hairy body with a better sense of smell than sense of sight and his nervous system has got to be wildly different but I’m pretty much certain he loves me and one of the truest things about me is that I love him. He is lying with his head on my butt because when he made it clear that this was how he was going to fall asleep I went of course this is what we’re doing now. Like this living thing that experiences the world in a way I could never understand communicated to me that he desired to lay his head upon my buttocks and I said yes. How many thousands of generations of members of our species had to work to adapt to each other in such a way that I can lay here in cozy comfort knowing that while my neck and shoulders are displeased with this arrangement my nervous system, my endocrine system, my cardiovascular system are benefiting from the strange bond our ancestors managed to build? How strange and beautiful that some ancient wolf going look they’ve got snacks and some prehistoric human going I dunno that forest creature sure has scary teeth but I think it looks like a potential pal lead to you and me sitting like this, my arm slowly falling asleep, you starting to snore because somewhere along the way in your genetic line we fucked up your breathing. My family brought you into this house for the sole purpose of having a creature for me to love and care for. Your job is to be loved. I don’t think I would have made it these past three years without you. Some dude was like yeah you can have some liver and all of a sudden your little head is on my butt and you’re a dog living, breathing, heart beating and we love each other. This is real. We’re alive together.

There is joy in this existence and how strange and beautiful is that?

I know I’ve said this before but vampires

don’t show up on camera

can fly/scale walls

immune to bullets

can break into any safe by turning into fog or some bullshit

could probably hypnotize security guards as needed

therefore I am in dire need of a heist film where a group of vampires band together to steal back their old stuff from museums

Transfem oppression: yeah the other day this jealous cis girl told me I have an obvious adam's apple and that I'll never be a real woman and now I wanna die because I'm not pretty like the other girls!!!

Transmasc oppression: yeah the other day this guy that had a crush on me in high school found out I transitioned and now he keeps texting me begging me to detransition for him, and he somehow found out where I live and where I work, and he keeps sending me rape threats. Also yesterday I went to the men's restroom and I almost got raped but thankfully my friend walked in before anything happened. Thank god nothing happened especially because if I got pregnant I'd get no treatment cause I already changed the gender marker on my birth certificate.

See how stupid that was? See how when I talked about "transfem oppression" I cherry picked a specific issue that mostly affects white binary trans women, completely overlooking the experiences of trans women of color and non-binary transfems. See how this post willfully ignores the very real violence that happens to transfems? See how this doesn't help transmascs at all and only undermines transfems. See how this implies that cis men only target transmascs, and that cis women are incapable of violence?

Wow it's almost as if we don't have to gaslight one group and undermind their experiences in order to talk about the experiences of the other... Funny that.

Yes. My goodness yes. In high school I was routinely shoved into the “transgender encyclopedia” role by teachers. They would be talking about something gender related, someone would ask a question about trans people, and the teacher would just hand the question off to me. Honestly, I would prefer that to them stumbling through it, but seriously? Why did this fifteen year old end up teaching half the lesson? Can you consider for five seconds what that does to a kid? It was like being offered the choice of a) shutting it down, saying nothing and experiencing an uptick in bullying because I couldn’t explain my complex, trans existence to the class or b) getting into it and experiencing an uptick in bullying because I probably said five separate things the class bigots object to. Either way I will experience some degree of harassment.

I also dealt with a crushing pressure to be a good little encyclopedia because I knew that if that person Googled it instead of asking me nonbinary would autofill to ‘is made up’. I know that when someone has a genuine question if I can’t answer or give a sufficient answer that person will likely judge my entire community? I’m not a fucking ambassador? I’m not an expert? I’m just some dude you cornered at the family reunion. We’ve literally never spoken before. And that’s when they’re approaching me in good faith. Half the time it’s straight up harassment.

It is kind of funny though when you explain the most base level concept and the cis person you’re talking to looks like you blew their mind. Like, come on. I literally just showed you a stock photo of the genderbread person and told you that gender is socially constructed and I think I somehow shattered your worldview.

Anyway, yeah. OP is absolutely right. Being an activist isn’t a prerequisite to being trans.

Queer 👏 people 👏 are 👏 not 👏 all 👏 fucking 👏 activists 👏

Stop quizzing us on queer history and asking us questions we aren’t qualified to answer about the world and about politics and about our identities

Stop trying to back us into a corner so you can justify your discrimination on the basis that we don’t know what we’re talking about or can’t “defend” ourselves to you

Stop treating every queer person that stands up and says “I want to be treated like a person” as if they’re an activist

Cut that bullshit out

Marginalised people just want to exist and be happy

I don’t know everything, and that doesn’t make me undeserving of your respect or my human rights you fucker

I don’t even owe you the stuff I do know- I still am entitled to basic fucking respect

TLDR; Queer people shouldn’t have to be historians or scientists for you to not be a fucking dick

I- is- that’s an option? Like, there’s a word for this? Can I- can I have it? I don’t have to ditch lesbianism as a man? I don’t have to call myself straight and deal with ‘this makes my skin squiggly’ discomfort? That feeling that my attraction to women is sapphic is… allowed? I can be a man and like women in a gay way? For real? New label? For me? Wow this is a great day to be gay.

Lesboy and Male Lesbian Infographic - repost from my friend thelesbianbakugou

Since his account got terminated a few years ago, me and thelesbianbakugou decided to replatform this lil info sheet! There's one on mspec lesbians too but we just have to find it

Sadly we don't have access to the original image credits, if you know who made some of the images, please let us know and we'll credit them here!

tags for reach woo! @mogai-place @mogai-sunflowers @neopronouns @genderqueerdykes @ghosttypebeat @our-lesboy-experience @transonlyspace @mogai-faggot @enbermoonlish

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to lgbtq+ indigenous youth:

just a reminder that you are under no obligation to label yourself according to the western-centric + white-centric labels of gender and sexuality.

lgbtq+ identities existed long before colonization touched our land. You do not have to exchange one type of conformity for another to fit in with other lgbtq+ folks.

If labels like nonbinary, genderfluid, etc feel good to you, go for it!

If two-spirit feels right, that’s awesome! If not, don’t sweat it.

If you have an identity specific to your indigenous heritage, you are under no obligation to translate your complex, nuanced identity into terms that non-natives understand.

You are under no explanation to explain your identity to non-natives.

(ok for non natives to reblog!)

the beautiful thing about ADHD is it can take you down many paths. within minutes you might go from checking if there's any holidays soon to discovering a national holiday to raise awareness for a little known disease and then suddenly you're spending your morning down a wikipedia rabbithole and you're rapidly experiencing the joys of learning and connecting the pieces of the universe together and entering a higher state of enlightened being. or at least having fun.

the horrible thing about ADHD is all that's nothing but a useless distraction from your REAL purpose in life: being a capitalist drone

i think that all the people who argue about gender by saying "the woke left cant even define a woman" need to get hit with the "who are you" question by a buddhist monk. no, thats your name, who are you. no thats your profession, who are YOU. no you fucking idiot thats your species, who are YOUU. dumb bitch u cant even define yourself

I am not an expert in childcare or childhood development, but I have learned some strategies for helping kids who are dealing with big emotions through trial and error. These are the ones I use for kids between 5 and 10.

Do not:

Yell back at a child or yell at a crying child. First, you can’t help a child self-regulate if you yourself can’t at least give the illusion of being regulated. Whether or not you think the child did or is doing something wrong, this is not the time to correct the behaviour. If the perceived problem behaviour already happened, I can guarantee you that in this moment they will not internalize a lecture or learn from a punishment. If the perceived problem behaviour is actively occurring and putting the child or someone else in danger, yelling might not make them stop. Yelling at them will likely make them more upset, thus making it harder for them to manage their behaviour. If the problem behaviour is not putting anyone in danger, then set a boundary, be firm, but do. not. yell. If there is no perceived problem behaviour aside from being upset, what the heck are you even yelling at them for? Having feelings? That’s very likely how they’ll interpret it. And let me tell you that getting yelled at by an adult when they’re upset will not make a kid less upset. Getting yelled at for crying makes it really hard to stop crying, actually. If they do manage to shut themselves up, it will be because they’ve just learned that they have to hide their hard feelings from you. That will not, ultimately, lead to a more regulated child, a child who trusts you, or a child who behaves more cooperatively.

That’s what not to do. Here’s what I suggest.

Understand (find out why they’re upset), validate (no, you don’t have to tell them that their reaction is proportionate, it probably isn’t, or excuse any perceived problem behaviour, just let them that their feelings are real and allowed), regulate (show them how to take deep breaths, guide them through focusing on their senses, maybe just get them somewhere private where they can cry it out), and plan (how do we help you feel calmer in this sort of situation next time, what do we do to solve the problem that made you feel upset, how do we help you feel safe reintegrating into this activity, how does your behaviour need to change to be safer/kinder). These can happen in any order. Some kids will not be able to explain the situation that made them upset until you help them regulate. Some won’t be able to feel regulated until they have a plan to deal with the situation. Some kids will be regulated pretty much as soon as they feel validated. Sometimes the same approach works for one kid every time they’re upset, sometimes you need to try a different take from situation to situation. You need to be prepared to tailor your approach to each kid and each situation, accept that you may misstep and be prepared to backtrack or improvise, and this is key, appear calm and regulated even if you’re not. Sometimes situations that upset kids upset adults too and often seeing a kid upset is in itself distressing for adults. It’s understandable if you need a moment to put on a calm face. I personally like to calm myself down by modelling deep breaths for the child. Calms two birds with one stone.

It has taken me years to get to a point where I can not actively make it worse like 95% of the time and maybe be helpful like 70% of the time.

There's a post going around Tumblr about how if you're post-menopausal and have bleeding, you should get it checked by your doctor. I brought some minor bleeding I'd had up in a doctor visit earlier this year, prompted by that post, and this week, after a biopsy, I found out I have cancer. It's early stage and the survival odds at 5 years are 99%. I have an oncologist appointment and we may have caught it early enough that surgery alone will be sufficient treatment (no radiation/chemo).

So that post may have saved my life and it may have made my treatment a lot easier too.

If you get into menopause and then start bleeding again, really, get your reproductive innards checked out. The life you save may be your own.

What to do if you suddenly find yourself homeless

FOOD

Find your nearest food bank or mission, for food

grocery stores with free samples, bakeries + stores with day-old bread

different fast food outlets have cheaper food and will generally let you hang out for a while.

some dollar stores carry food like cans of beans or fruit

SHELTER

Sleeping at beaches during the day is a good way to avoid suspicion and harassment

sleep with your bag strapped to you, so someone can’t steal it

Some churches offer short term residence

Find your nearest homeless shelter

Look for places that are open to the public

A large dumpster near a wall can often be moved so that flipping up the lids creates an angled shelter to stay dry

HYGIENE

A membership to the YMCA is usually only 10$, which has a shower, and sometimes laundry machines and lockers.

Public libraries have bathrooms you can use

Dollar stores carry low-end soaps and deodorant etc.

Wet wipes are all purpose and a life saver

Local beaches, go for a quick swim

Some truck stops have showers you can pay for

Staying clean is the best way to prevent disease, and potentially get a job to get back on your feet

Pack 7 pairs of socks/undies, 2 outfits, and one hooded rain jacket

OTHER

first aid kit

 sunscreen

 a travel alarm clock or watch

 mylar emergency blanket

 a backpack is a must

 downgrade your cellphone to a pay as you go with top-up cards

 sleeping bag

 travel kit of toothbrush, hair brush/comb, mirror

 swiss army knife

 can opener

cw: ableism against neurodivergent folks, discussion of police violence, contains a personal story about a negative interaction with security officers

Most of the time I exist in a strange middle ground where I pass as neurotypical to some, albeit a weird one while some people just assume I’m autistic. Part of the reason why I want to get a diagnosis is because while yes, people who assume I’m autistic sometimes treat me like a child, I rarely encounter outright hostility with them when I can’t hide my autistic traits. Neurotypicals seem to need to have a diagnosis disclosed to them before they’re willing to tolerate perceived strangeness. It’s that thing where it’s okay to bully someone for autistic traits, but it magically becomes discrimination when the person discloses a diagnosis. I see people talking about this a lot, but I want to emphasize the potential danger of not being able to prove your autism.

In meltdown, I have had campus security called on me. Fair enough. I couldn’t stop screaming. I can see how that might scare someone. They wouldn’t believe me that I wasn’t high. I had to give them way more personal information than I should have had to to convince them that I was not, in fact, taking drugs I wasn’t prescribed. I had to tell them what medications I was on, convince them that I was taking them, tell who my psychiatrist was, and that I was on a wait list for a therapist before they would stop trying to convince me to admit I was high. Before they would treat me like a person and not a threat. I essentially had to prove that I was an acceptable mentally ill to them.

First I say, so what if I had been high? So what if I wasn’t being "appropriately managed?" Even in those cases, it is not helpful and potentially dangerous for the person in crisis to treat them like they’re a threat. That’s ableist. Requiring people to convince you that they are receiving or pursuing certain treatments or otherwise meet specific standards of respectability before you treat them like a person is ableist.

What if I had been having a verbal shut down that day? I was barely able to talk at all in that moment. Speaking felt physically painful and I was struggling to form complete sentences. I was lucky I was able to communicate the necessary details to earn safety from them. What if I hadn’t been able to? What if they had been real cops? What if I hadn’t been able to say "no touch" or communicate other basic needs and the situation escalated?

What if I had had an autism card? That situation would have been much less terrifying. I would feel safer going out in public knowing that if I get upset and can’t communicate, I have a diagnosis other people are likely to believe to back me up. I can make my own warning card with instructions on how to help me, but ultimately, people don’t listen to disabled people, they listen to their doctors. If I say I’m autistic to an authority figure and later on I can’t prove it, I will be in trouble.

The same way I hope people in my classes assume I’m autistic so they are willing to be tolerant of my autistic traits, I hope people who can genuinely hurt me assume in my worst moments that I am autistic so they won’t fucking tase me.

If I, a white person, a housed person, am worried about being hurt because I can’t be clear about my autism, imagine what it’s like for people from other demographics that are already more vulnerable to police violence. People who are also less likely to receive an official diagnosis.

I am willing to discuss this and would love to hear other people’s perspectives, but I will not be debating people about my choice to self-diagnose.

Reminder for this pride month.

Here is a list of sources you SHOULDN'T listen to about intersex issues & bodies

TERFs

Anyone who uses the term "DSD"

Intersex-medicalists

The medical establishment in general

Fanfiction

The trans community

Trans forums

Perisex (non-intersex) people in general

Futanari porn

Here is a list of sources you SHOULD listen to about intersex issues & bodies

Intersex advocacy groups

Intersex people