Ponderings - Tumblr Posts
working to produce vs. living abundantly. the need and drive to produce diminishes creative expression.
to post the first chapter of my first fic, or wait to get a few more chapters done, that is the question
Sometimes i am thankful
that I don’t know everything.
Every day is
something new.
There is always more to learn, to
explore create taste feel hold find touch understand hear smell savor.
Thank god the world is small,
but not too small,
always a little beyond my reach.
Hello all! I know it's been a good while since I've posted anything here and the truth is I come and go as I please, looking if there were any new Hobi fics out there.
Sadly I've seen a pretty fast decline of stories created of him. 🥺
Truth be told, I have 2 stories in the backs under WIP but have yet to get any updates as I got stuck where I would like for this story to head to.. (Yes, both are multi-chapters) As much as i love reading smit like the next person, I'm also someone who yearns for stories — ACTUAL BUILD-UPS where we see character development, plots deepening and such..
I just haven't found the drive to write again.
I keep going back and forth with my works and it's honestly left me in a blankspace.
Come on, creativity. Work with me hereereee💔
I... Felt like I needed to write down what I currently feel...
When all becomes too overwhelming, we tend to search for an outlet, yes?
Let this be a safe place where I may lay down my thoughts and hope my emotions do not become my undoing...
The holographic principle
Minä olen varjo. Kolmiulotteinen kuva toisesta maailmasta. Minä en ole oikeesti täällä.
"Stans dit spil, du natur, som hvælver dig taust over væsenernes skjæbner."
(Sigbjørn Obstfelder, Stans Dit Spil, Efterladte Arbejder 1903)
would roughly (again, roughly) translate to: "Stop your play, oh nature, that arches silently over the fortune of the living beings."
Currently digging deep into Pär Lagerkvist and came across this fellow who also knows his stuff.
If the real world is not altogether rejected, it is but touched here and there, and into the places we have left empty we summon rhythm, balance, pattern, images that remind us of vast passions, the vagueness of past times, all the chimeras that haunt the edge of trance...
(Yeats, The Tragic Theater, 1910)
La torture, c'est la raison.
(Foucault: Dits et écrits III, S. 397f.)
officially translates to: 'torture is reason'
....itches, sort of....
When you have to attend to things of that sort, to the mere incidents of the surface, the reality - the reality, I tell you - fades. The inner truth is hidden - luckily, luckily. But I felt it all the same; I felt often its mysterious stillness watching me at my monkey tricks, just as it watches you fellows performing on your respective tight-ropes for - what is it? half-a-crown a tumble
Joseph Conrad - Heart of Darkness
the text - by Dag Hammerskjöld - reads:
Det som ger livet värde kan du nå - och förlora. Men aldrig äga. Först och främst gäller det sanningen.
You can reach that which gives life meaning - and loose it. But never posses it. This, primarily, concerns truth.
(the pic is almost full-scale, for those who'd like to check)
That takes care of it, I think. The books, the chess set, the autographs, the miscellaneous, the suit. Now that my kingdom has been disposed of, I feel content. There's no need for you to look at me like that. I know what I'm doing, and I'm glad to have done it. [...] For the time being, we move off in opposite directions. But sooner or later we'll meet again, I'm sure of it. Everything works out in the end, you see, everything connects. The nine circles. The nine planets. The nine innings. Our nine lives. Just think of it. The correspondences are infinite. But enough of this blather for one night. The hour grows late, and sleep is calling us both. Come, give me your hand. Yes, that's right, a good firm grip. Like so. And now shake. That's right, a shake of farewell. A shake to last us to the end of time.
Paul Auster - Moon Palace
If only beauty in words was still a thing...
We'll be setting a westerly course, plunging into the wilderness.
a statement - I could 'hear' with my 'mind's ear': "We are amateurs at breathing, we are amateurs at walking, we are amateurs at naming colours, we are amateurs at rubbing our noses, we are amateurs at grunting, we are amateurs at twisting hair locks, we are amateurs at drinking mango juice. "We are amateurs at swimming, we are amateurs at watching sunsets, we are amateurs at waking up in the morning, we are amateurs at biting our nails, we are amateurs at spotting extraterrestrials, we are amateurs at sneezing, we are amateurs at inventing words. "We are amateurs at twirling our fingers, we are amateurs at tying green ribbons, we are amateurs at catching cold, we are amateurs at drawing a horse, we are amateurs at being drawn by horses, we are amateurs at curling our toes, we are amateurs at growing." I was filled with joy. The roundelay that was being played by the microscopic entities in the pentagonal room was a song I had waited all to long to hear. At last I was in the company of my equals, as far from the maddening pressures of professional life as I could possibly imagine: "We are amateurs at singing out loud, we are amateurs at boiling an egg, we are amateurs at throwing dice, we are amateurs at smiling, we are amateurs at banging pots and pans, we are amateurs at playing with ourselves, we are amateurs at moving a chair from the hallway to the bedroom."
Sjón (The Blue Fox, Marvels of Twilight & The Reykjavík Whale Watching Massacre)
from a short story published in the booklet to Hauschka's Salon des amateurs
I've walked a long way, yet I'm still searching for a place to call home.
I've come a long way, but I'm still yearning for a place to call home .....
To become detached can bring great healing. When a sudden detachment meets one involuntarily, the warm, familiar world becomes unknown.
Pondering whether or not to re-take the HSK4 exam (without the speaking this time) since I failed to meet the passing mark by around 10 points last time and I refuse to believe that the past few months of studying wouldn't be able to give me that boost.
So we got our class schedules today and it turns out that I'm in the same class as I was last semester, probably because I requested to stay in the same level in the survey that was sent out without actually thinking everything through.
To be fair, this survey was before I got my exam results back and honestly I think did pretty well for someone who was initially placed 2 levels below because I didn't do too great on my placement test (although I evidently redeemed myself on my swap out test).
This upcoming week we're allowed to try out other levels before either staying or doing the swap test to go to a higher level, which I might do if the next level is manageable.
I feel like the main issue is that despite being really out of my depth in the beginning, this level ended up being challenging enough, but what if the next level is too difficult and this level is too easy? I don't want to waste this semester, but I also want to thrive rather than try to survive and constantly be stressed out about studying.
I guess the upcoming week shall reveal its secrets so there's not that much sense in obsessing over it. I for one will try to make the most of the remaining days before classes start.
Have a good weekend everyone!