it's my drama. appreciate my flaws & learn from my mistakes. it's okay to cry your heart out but don't forget that there's always a second chance. be strong but don't forget to be yourself. you can be wild and carefree but don't forget to be serious at times. oh remember to laugh too! life is amazing and unfair at the same time... deal with it even if it's not the reality that you wanted!
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Day18 Of This Battle: Talking Abt It Only Breaks My Heart.
Day18 of this battle: talking abt it only breaks my heart.
I started talking abt what i feel abt the situation right now and still, it breaks my heart. I try not to let any tears fall coz i dont want them to see how bad & weak i am feeling right now. I am still in the state of shock and just as what my kuya said earlier... my emotions are still high. It's true. I am still in the verge of tears whenever i am alone, i am thinking, or whenever i am not doing anything. And as much as i want to focus on what is happening at tge moment, i can't help but missed out something. It feels like i am not myself. It's crazy coz my attention just shuts off and i keep zoning out. And before i went to bed, i learned that Umpe is nanghihina daw. Nagsuka sya. Ang sakit malaman na wala akong magawa for her. Tawa ako ng tawa kanina, smile ng smile, salita ng salita nung nasa school and after school. Pero ang Umpe ko masama na pala ang lasa. Ang sakit kasi hindi ko alam kung anu na tlga ang nangyayari. Everytime na i try to get on track, some unwanted stuff comes up. All i am asking lang naman is for Umpe to get better and be healthy again. I know i am asking for too much. But i swear, she doesnt deserve this illness. She deserves to live longer and happier. Please God, wag nio pa hayaang manghina ang Umpe. Tulungan nio po sya. Make her stronger and healthier. Please be with her. Please send the Holy Spirit and some angels next to her para po hindi sya mahirapan. Please make her better. Please dear God. Umpe, be strong! I love you and I will continue praying for you. Kukulitin ko si God na pagalingin ka nya. I love you Umpe ko, always and forever.
More Posts from Iamkakasince1991
Another challenge in my life...
School. Fck idk what to do anymore! It feels like everything is going against my plan. I will not be able to apply for tge nursing program next week coz i didnt tool the TEAS test... and i am not taking a risk to take it now coz i know i am not prepared at all. FML! Another reason to make my parents sad and disappointed. I am a failure. A worthless human being. I hate my life and how i live my life. It has no meaning. No goal. No purpose. I hate myself! I wishtime will stop so i can think clearly and plan carefully what i should do next...
i thought i was the last man, woman in my case, standing.
out of all four of us here, i thought i will be the one who's going to just let this day passed by. out of all four of us, i thought they will be more eager to talk to her. but they all ended up sleeping. they must be really tired from today's busy life. but i sort of disappointed that they did not even wait for a little longer. at the same time, i feel stupid and unwanted for waiting. i guess i am waiting for nothing. hindi ko lang alam kung sipsip lang ba o tanga lang ako talaga. hahaha nag-aantay ako sa wala. kahit nga siguro tadhana tinatwanan na ako ngayon. para kasi akong tanga na sobrang excited to talk to her pero hindi naman mangyariyari. siguro hindi rin nya ako gusto makausap. ansakit lang eh. alam mo yun. yung feeling na unwanted ka. o siguro madrama lang ako today at na mimisunderstood ko ang mga bagay bagay. ah ewan. Tanga nga kasi AKO!
minsan sinasabi ko na lang sa sarili ko na strong akong tao at malalampasan ko ito. kaya lang minsan di na umeepekto eh. ganun ata talaga.
walang taong strong pag dating sa taong pinakakamahal mo lalo na kung siya ang mundo mo and he/she means everything to you.