Out Of The Woods

Out Of The Woods

Click here for my masterlist.

Click here to add yourself to my taglist.

Prompt - ‘When the sun came up, you were looking at me.’

Requested - Yes - @cinnamonmurda

If you had been asked years ago to describe your relationship with Daryl you would have said it was anything but simple. At the beginning, all those years back in the earlier days before Rick had even joined back in Atlanta, Daryl hadn’t liked you, of course Daryl hadn’t liked anybody back then but you he especially had a special dislike for. There was something about you that made him even angrier, even more hot headed and defensive than he had been around the others, years later he knew that his old self hated you because he saw you as a liability. If there was ever a person not made for this new world, it was you and Daryl knew it, you were too damn kind, too naive to survive long.

You hadn’t thought too much of Daryl either, the man far too quick to start a fight, too ignorant, too harsh. You hadn’t wanted to be around him back then, both of you going out of your way to put distance between you and yet you were always the first to call each other out. Whenever Daryl voiced his intolerant views, whenever you made a move that he deemed unsafe, whatever it was you and Daryl were always the first to point out the others flaws.

Things didn’t change much until the prison, well for you they changed earlier than that. For so long you had thought Daryl wasn’t capable of caring for anybody else but watching how determined he had been to look for Sophia, watching him go night after night without sleeping, sneaking away to look some more after doing the same all day, something about it changed something for you.

During your stay at the prison though Daryl had watched as you offered to go on a run with Rick and before Daryl could shoot that idea down Rick had agreed to let you go only for you to show back up not long after dark with a bleeding head and holding your aching side.

Something changed for Daryl there, he had no idea what it was but he had waited a few days, tried to talk himself out of it but eventually gave in. He waited until you were alone to approach you, feeling awkward as he did, despite being around each other for so long Daryl could safely say in that time you hadn’t had one civil conversation.

So when he came to you with an offer to teach you how to shoot and defend yourself it made sense for you to jump to defensiveness, accusing him of messing with you because of the incident a few days ago that had resulted in Hershel giving you a line of stitches on your forehead.

It had taken some time for Daryl to finally manage to convince you that he was serious but eventually you gave in, knowing that if you wanted to survive then Daryl was right you needed to learn to protect yourself, even if it meant spending time with the man.

Of course learning to protect yourself didn’t come in too handy, how could it when at even the slightest sign of danger Daryl stepped in. At first it started off with him taking a shot at a walker when you froze, only moving again when an arrow shot passed your head and Daryl knocked into your shoulder to retrieve it. From there though it grew, as you spent more time with each other Daryl started putting himself between you and whatever danger was there before you could even raise your gun, whether it be him grabbing your arm and shoving you behind him or taking out the target from the other side of the fight.

By the time you arrived at Alexandria the two of you were best friends, rather than jumping to point each other's flaws out now you were the first one to defend the other, always ready to take a swing or go head to head with anyone who had something bad to say about the other. It was easy to ignore the change in your relationship, glaring at anyone who dared mention the shift from worst enemies to the best of friends.

It wasn’t until Alexandria you were forced to admit something had changed, when everything was settled and your group was moving in and you and Daryl were both offered separate houses. Immediately your gaze fell to him upon hearing the new living arrangements only to find he was already looking your way with a glare, though the glare wasn’t meant for you.

For the longest time it had been you and Daryl, you’d slept practically within arm’s reach of each other since sorting yourselves out and forming a friendship and now you were meant to sleep in a whole different house? You had hated the idea, despite how things had started between you, you felt safe with Daryl, when he was around you knew you were going to be ok. To suddenly not have him next to you left you feeling unsettled.

Daryl hated the thought of you not being near him. A while back he would have done anything to be away from you and now the idea of it made his skin crawl, he already didn’t like this place all that much but to take you from him, to move him to where he couldn’t protect you, no he hated that.

Daryl was the one to voice his displeasure to your shock, you had known he wouldn’t have liked it but you hadn’t expected him to actually say anything, especially not in front of the whole group but he had and it was worth it when you placed your bag down on the bedroom floor.

Both houses you had been offered only consisted of one bedroom but neither you nor Daryl had complained about it. Daryl would never have admitted it out loud but he was secretly glad for it, not ready for you to be away from him. It wasn’t even just the fact he wanted to protect you but he knew you both felt safer together, knew you both slept better knowing the other was right there.

And so it went on like that, the two of you living together and despite having kept close quarters for some time now this felt different, it was more intimate, more domestic. Once the door shut behind you it was easy to forget that the world had fallen apart, it was easy to just fall into a world that only existed for you and Daryl, one where the two of you left your baggage at the door and just let yourselves be.

Of course it wasn’t all perfect, how could it be? The world outside was still a mess and you were insistent on helping however you could. There was a run coming up, one that Eugene had mapped out and called a suicide mission. Once Daryl had found out you had volunteered he had stormed into the house full of demands that you stay behind whilst he went.

His argument hadn’t gone down well, you shooting back why he should be allowed to go and put himself in danger whilst you stayed behind, you yelling that you were perfectly capable of defending yourself and that you didn’t need him to treat you like a child.

It was rare you and Daryl argued, it had happened a lot in the early days but since the prison you could count the number of times you had on one hand. When you did fight though it was ruthless, both of you knew exactly what buttons to press, knew exactly what words would hurt most and neither of you held back.

This fight lasted a while before Daryl ended it by storming out of the house, the echoing slam of the door silencing you as you listened to the roar of his bike before you were left alone.

You couldn’t say what it was that had gotten both of you so riled up, recently things had been more tense, not between you and Daryl but between Alexandria and the outside world. It had put Daryl on edge and he’d been hovering around you more than usual, always quick to snap at anybody who even looked at you for too long.

The hovering had been starting to get to you a bit but now that Daryl had put space between you, you found you hated it.

You didn’t know how long you stood in the living room for, silently staring at the door as if you could make Daryl to walk through it but Daryl was long gone and you tried to push the bad feeling in the pit of your stomach away. With a sigh you turned and made your way up to your bedroom, sinking onto the bed.

Your eyes fell on to the nightstand, a small huff of laughter escaping you as you saw the polaroid that rested there, reaching over to gently pick it up, your thumb brushing against the photograph, remembering the day you had taken it.

It had been a quiet day, one where you both got to stay in bed later than usual, you held against Daryl’s chest with his fingers brushing against your skin, holding you close. Neither of you had told the other how you felt, both far too scared but content with what you had now, it didn’t need to be defined but some days you did wish it was out there, that you could run your finger through his hair and pull him in for a kiss.

Once you had finally managed to pull yourself out of bed for food you ended up laying on the couch together, music playing softly from the old record player that had been here when you moved in. Daryl’s arms wrapped around you as you traded secrets of lives that didn’t exist anymore and soft laughs whilst entwined together.

As you tilted your head to laugh your eyes fell on the polaroid camera Daryl had managed to find for you on a run a few months back, you hadn’t used it yet because there wasn’t much film left and you wanted to save it for something special.

You and Daryl had done this since moving to Alexandria, whenever you’d go on runs you’d both bring each other gifts back, some with the intent to just make the other laugh, some that made you smile and get slightly teary eyed, some that he accepted with a mumbled thanks but his smile showed how much it meant to him. At some point because of this the house you shared had become a home filled with pieces of you and Daryl littered throughout it.

“Where you goin’?” Daryl had asked as you wormed your way out of his arms and walked the few steps between the couch and the shelves to pick up the camera. “What you doin’ with that?”

You didn’t answer him as you got back on the couch, his arms immediately circling around you again and you smiled up at him widely, shaking the camera at him and laughing as he groaned.

“Please!” You begged before he had the chance to protest, turning further in his hold to pout up at him.

“Nah, save it for something.”” Daryl said, holding back a smile as you shook your head.

“Come on, Daryl, please. I wanna remember this.” You told him, causing him to scoff. “I wanna remember you.”

“You don’t need no dumb picture to remember me.” He grumbled, his face softening even as he rolled his eyes causing you to laugh. “I ain’t goin’ anywhere.”

“You know that’s not the point!” You pleaded with him, watching as he narrowed his eyes with no real heat behind the action and you could see the way his lips twitched as he fought back a smile. “C’mon just let me take my dumb picture.”

More pleading had followed but eventually the sound of a shutter going off filled the room and as you looked at the picture you couldn’t stop your gaze from falling onto Daryl’s smile, one that was reserved only for you in the privacy of your house.

You couldn’t say for sure how long you sat in bed, fingers brushing against the photograph in your hand but at some point you knew you had to go track Daryl down, knowing full well he’d be too scared to show his face back at the house for fear of you wanting rid of him, as if that could ever happen.

The snow had been falling steadily the past few days so you made sure to shrug a jacket on before heading out of the house and taking one of the cars, only stopping to pick a radio up before you put the tracking skills Daryl had taught you to use and headed out.

Daryl had no real destination in mind when he had sped away from Alexandria, cursing himself for picking a fight with you and hating that he had left without making things right. He couldn’t turn back though, he wanted to give you some space, afraid to face you again in case you told him to leave.

He hated that even after all these years he was still so unsure around you. He knew you were his best friend, he knew you loved him like that but he never knew if there was anything behind those lingering touches, the way you’d brush his hair out of his face or hug him tight when he’d been gone longer than planned.

He knew he loved you, more than anything in this world, you were the best thing in his life. It might have taken the world ending for you to meet but Daryl couldn’t say he was sorry for it, he knew in a life long gone you and him would never have crossed paths and even if by some miracle you had there was no chance somebody like you would have wanted anything to do with someone like him.

Sure to begin with things hadn’t been easy between you but at some point you had come to mean everything to him. He knew if he had to he’d turn the world upside down for you, kill without a second thought if you were ever in trouble. He loved you and he was too much of a damn coward to ever tell you.

Eventually he stopped the motorbike, climbing off it to take a moment and catch his breath. Thinking about his feelings for you always made him feel unsteady, he wished he were brave enough to just tell you but he could never tell if you felt the same.

At some point during Daryl’s musing the twigs around him snapped, footsteps coming closer to him but he was so deep in thought he didn’t hear them, not until he heard a gun click.

He whipped around and glared hard at the two men before him, both pointing a gun at him and he cursed himself again for being so stupid and not grabbing his crossbow before he had stormed out of the house.

“We don’t want no trouble now.” One of the men said, causing Daryl to scoff.

“Yeah, sure as hell don’t look like it when you’re pointing that damn gun at me.” He shot back, looking around for something to use as a weapon but coming up empty.

“We ain’t gonna use ‘em if you don’t give us a reason.” The other man sneered, walking slowly towards the bike. “We’re just gonna take this bike and be on our way.”

“Nope, you stay right where you are, mister.” The first man said when Daryl took a step towards them but Daryl was never in the mood for people like this on a good day and today was not a good day.

He swung his fist, feeling a sense of satisfaction as it connected with the man's nose and blood immediately sprayed from it but it didn’t last long as the other man swung for him and sent him staggering back. It only lasted for a few minutes but punches were traded until Daryl was bruised and bleeding, only falling to the floor when one of the men got a well aimed kick in.

He hissed in pain but still went to get back up, falling straight to the floor not a moment later, the sound of a gunshot ringing through the woods and Daryl clutched his side, feeling his shirt soak with blood immediately.

“Told you we wouldn’t use it less you gave us a reason.” The man said as he gestured for his friend to get on the bike and Daryl struggled to keep his eyes open as the sound of his bike faded.

By the time you found Daryl the snow was coming down hard and fast, you struggled to get the car through it but eventually you were jumping out of it, leaving the keys behind and the door wide open when you saw a patch of blood in the snow.

“Daryl?” You called out, not giving a second thought as to who or what could be lurking in the woods. “Daryl!”

A small groan of pain came from somewhere to your right and in an instance you were falling onto your knees in the snow, cradling Daryl’s bruised face in your hands before your eyes fell onto his blood soaked shirt.

You cursed softly as you patted his cheeks, pleading with him to open his eyes. He didn’t move for a second but his eyelids fluttered open for a moment before falling back shut.

“Alright, you’re gonna be alright, I’m gonna get you home.” You promised him, moving to stand up and drag Daryl to the car when you heard a door slam from behind you.

Your head shot around just in time to see a man quickly reversing out of the small clearing in the woods before you could even stand up, leaving you staring at the empty space the car had been wondering how on earth you were meant to get Daryl home.

As if it couldn’t get any better, it was then you heard the groans and snarls.

“Shit.” You cursed again, eyes darting in every direction as you wondered how on earth you had managed to miss the horde of walkers closing in from all around.

With all the energy you had you managed to get Daryl up off the ground, swinging his arm around you as you carried his weight and winced at the pained groan that slipped past his lips as his wound brushed against his shirt.

You had no idea where you were or where you were going but you knew you had to move, apologising as you practically dragged Daryl away from the hoard of walkers.

As you fought against the snow, cursing as you nearly tripped a few times, having to stop several more to hoist Daryl more securely around your shoulder, you fought to get the radio you’d left attached to your belt and desperately hoped somebody was listening.

“Is anybody there?” You asked, waiting for a response but there was only silence. “Come on, come one, somebody answer please.”

“Y/N, is that you?” Eugene finally answered back and you felt your knees almost give out in relief as you forced your feet to keep moving through the snow.

“Eugene, thank god! Listen I need help, I’ve got Daryl but we ran into some trouble and shit, shit, shit.” you cursed again as you tripped on something in the snow, nearly sending you and Daryl to the ground but just about managing to right yourself.

“Y/N, what happened? Are you alright?” Eugene asked as you turned around and your eyes widened as more of the herd broke off to move in your direction before you glanced down to see what had tripped you, taking a shaky breath and pulling Daryl along when you saw a walker on the ground reaching for you.

“Eugene, there’s too many of them, we’ve got no car, no bike and no weapons, you gotta send help.” You pleaded into the radio, voice breaking as you forced yourself to stare ahead, to not look back as more and more walkers followed after you.

“Do you know the whereabouts of your location?” Eugene asked and you frowned before telling him what route you had taken, trying desperately to remember everything.

“You have to hurry, Daryl, he’s hurt and I can’t do this on my own.” You pleaded with him, voice cracking as a few tears made their way past your eyes and down your cheeks.

“Rest assured Y/N, we will find you.” Eugene promised and then the radio turned silent again whilst you prayed you and Daryl could hold up long enough for help to come.

You carried on dragging your feet through the snow, freezing but breaking out into a sweat from having Daryl’s entire weight on your shoulders and almost cried in relief when you saw a small shack not too far in the distance.

With a final look behind you you forced yourself to move faster as you saw more and more walkers moving in your direction, practically panting by the time you had the door shut and Daryl set gently on the floor.

The shack was small, barely big enough to fit both you and Daryl in but you didn’t care, it was a safe place that the walkers would hopefully walk right past, leaving you and Daryl alone until help came.

You crouched down in front of Daryl, ripping your jacket off despite the cold and balling it up before lifting Daryl’s shirt up to see the gunshot wound. You winced at the blood leaking from it and pressed your jacket against it with as much pressure as you could causing Daryl to jolt awake with a pained hissed, his hand coming up to weakly try and push you away but you caught it and gave it a soft squeeze.

“You’re alright, it’s just me.” You murmured, watching as he forced his eyes open with a frown.

“Y/N?” Daryl slurred your name out and you forced a shaky smile onto your face. “Wha’da hell you doin’ out ’ere?”

“Rescuing you apparently.” You laughed, watching as Daryl frowned when the sound came out more like a sob.

“S’meant to be my job.” Daryl huffed, another pained groan escaping him causing your panic to worsen.

He was right, rescuing you had always been his job, even back in those early days when you hadn’t gotten along. You remembered when you had gone out on a run into the city, determined to prove yourself to Daryl as he scoffed at you. He had told you it was a suicide run for someone like you and yet when you failed to come back after storming off he was the one to track you down, he was the one to pull you out of the room surrounded by walkers.

Once you were friends Daryl made it his mission to protect you but sometimes you wandered off, sometimes you just managed to get yourself into situations that lead you to needing to be rescued. No matter how many times Daryl grumbled about it he was always the first one to notice you missing and the first one to bring you back.

“Thought I’d have a go at the rescuing this time.” You smiled and watched as he chuckled before his face scrunched up in pain. “You’re gonna be alright, the others are already on their way.”

You watched as Daryl’s eyes slipped shut again and let out a shaky breath, squeezing his hand again and feeling the smallest bit of relief as he squeezed back before he forced them back open to look at you.

“M’sorry,” he said after a few beats of silence passed between the two of you and you frowned, looking at him questioningly. “For before, for pickin’ a fight, was damn stupid.”

“It doesn’t matter now.” You assured him, knowing that the blame didn’t lie solely on him, knowing that you hadn’t needed to fight back but had anyway. “All that matters is that you’ll be alright, we’re gonna get outta here and you’re gonna get patched up then we can just lay on the couch until you get better.”

“Yeah,” Daryl chuckled a bit breathlessly, “yeah we can do that.”

You smiled to yourself, letting your thoughts fill with how many nights had passed with the two of you in the living room, too tired to pull yourselves off the couch as your bones ached and you were comfortable resting against each other.

The first time it had happened you remembered waking up to a flustered and apologetic Daryl, you quickly blinking awake to realise you had fallen asleep together, at some point in the night after a long run away from Alexandria you had ended up against Daryl’s chest with his arms around you.

You had avoided each other for most of the day after that, your thoughts on how much you liked being in Daryl’s arms, how safe you had felt, how easy it was to sleep and how well rested you were.

From that night it happened a few more times until eventually you both stopped waking up flustered and avoiding each other, neither one of you even pretended to be bashful about it anymore, both content with lying on the couch, safe in each other’s arms, easily drifting off to sleep with Daryl’s heartbeat against your ear.

You were startled out of your thoughts when you felt Daryl’s hand on your skin, his fingers lighting brushing against the top of your chest where a necklace rested.

“Forgot to bring my damn bow.” Daryl grunted as he tried to sit up straighter and you were quick to help him before letting him pull you down next to him, making sure you were still applying pressure to his wound. “This one ain’t much help.”

You laughed again, resting your head on his shoulder as you looked down at the necklace, it was well worn at this point, you had hardly taken it off since Daryl had given it to you.

You could still see the nervous look on his face, all week he had been nervous, he kept opening his mouth as if he had something to say but always let it fall back shut and turned the other way. You had gone to say something to him but decided against it, you didn’t want to pressure him to talk about something he clearly wasn’t ready to discuss.

So you were surprised to say the least when Daryl eventually grew impatient with himself, unable to find a way to give it to you without feeling painfully awkward so he had settled for just thrusting a chain at you. Your eyes had widened in shock when you took it off him, noticing the small archer's bow hanging from the chain before your expression morphed into a grin, pushing the necklace back into his hands and turning around, urging him to put it on you.

Once you turned back around and saw the smile on Daryl’s face, a barely there pull of the lips and his eyes softer than you had ever remembered seeing them, you wished you had had your camera then because you wouldn’t have hesitated to capture him in that moment.

You remembered that time clearly because it was the first time you had thought to yourself that you were in love with Daryl Dixon.

“I’d take this one any day.” You told him softly, tracing the bow with your fingers as you looked up at him, desperately praying to any force that was listening that the others would hurry.

Daryl was pale, a sheen of sweat covering his face as he fought to keep his eyes open, letting out pained hisses and groans every few minutes as you kept your jacket against the bleeding wound.

From outside you could hear leaves crunching, branches snapping, each sound sent a new wave of fear running through you, your mind running wild with different scenarios of the monsters lurking outside.

You shifted your gaze back to Daryl, lifting your hand to gently brush strands of hair from his sweat coated forehead, smiling slightly as he leaned into the touch. Your thumb brushed over a scar that was barely visible anymore, faded with age and only visible if you really looked but you knew it was there, you had been there when he got it. It had been during a bad run, you had come across another group who had immediately gotten the jump on you but Daryl had managed to get you both back in the car, tearing out of the parking lot and speeding down the road long after he had put distance between you and them.

All it took was Daryl glancing away to look at you, assuring himself that you were alright before he turned back to the road, foot slamming onto the brakes at the sudden hoard in front of you. The next thing he knew he was cursing in pain as he was thrown forward before he passed out.

You had immediately gone into panic mode as you so often did whenever Daryl got hurt, now that you were looking back on it it was a wonder you had remained oblivious to your feelings for the man for so long. When Daryl refused to wake up you cursed, looking between him and the walkers and knowing you didn’t have long.

Somehow you managed to drag Daryl into the back seat, ripping your sweater off and pressing it to his bleeding forehead, not unlike how your jacket was pressed to his side now, before jumping into the driver's seat and taking over, getting him back to Alexandria and into the small clinic.

They had asked you to wait outside for them to patch him up, telling you his injury would need a few stitches but when you were finally allowed to see him he was awake and looking at you apologetically.

“M’so damn sorry, Y/N/N,” Daryl had started to say but you cut him off immediately.

“There’s nothing to be sorry for, you’re alright, that’s all that matters. You are ok, right?” You asked, sliding into the seat next to him and taking his hand in yours, brushing your thumb against his knuckles softly.

“Yeah, m’alright, few stitches but Y/N I could’ve got you killed.” He was clearly feeling guilty for something that wasn’t his fault and you knew nothing you said would stop that, looking back on it it was obvious Daryl had feelings for you, he had always put your safety miles above everyone else’s, if you got hurt or if there was even the slimmest of chances you could have gotten hurt then that was on him no matter how much you tried to convince him otherwise.

“Daryl, I’m fine, I didn't even get hurt. You’re alright, we’re alright, okay?” You asked and watched him hesitate for a moment before his face crumpled.

In all the years you’d known Daryl you could count the number of times you’d seen him cry on one hand, so when you saw his eyes turn red and teary you couldn’t stop yours from doing the same as the morning sun filtered through the window and you clung to each other.

Daryl caught your hand in his, pulling it away from his scar and entwining them together. Your gaze shifted to meet his eyes and saw his pupils were bigger than usual, a tiny ring of blue barely visible as he looked at you, clearly struggling to stay awake and alert.

“Thanks for coming t’get me.” He whispered, suddenly sounding exhausted but shushing you as you went to sit up in panic. “M’alright, that’s what you always say right, I’m alright, you’re alright, we’re alright. We’re gonna be alright ain’t we, Y/N?”

“We’re alright, Daryl, I promise. You just gotta hold on a little while longer for me, you hear? I can’t do this without you, you promised me I wouldn’t need some dumb picture to remember you.” You told him, watching as his lips pulled into a shaky smile.

“I meant it.” He told you, squeezing your hand weakly. “I meant what I said but just in case, m’glad you have it.”

“Shut up, you’re gonna be alright.” You told him as tears began to slide down your face.

“Doesn’t feel like it.” He winced, shifting to pull you close enough so that he could rest his lips against your head. “Should have told you years ago, was never brave enough though.”

“Don’t do this now.” You pleaded with him but he shook his head.

“Just in case.” He repeated and you sniffed as more tears fell down your cheeks. “Should have told you how pretty you were, every damn morning when I got to wake up next to you, the sun shining on ya, so damn pretty. Should have told ya how much I wanted to kiss ya, all those nights on the couch but I really should’ve told ya how much I love you, should’ve told you you made this world worth livin’ in.”

By the time he finished his voice was barely a whisper, his breathing becoming fainter and fainter and you were sobbing, shaking his shoulder with your free hand in an attempt to get him to open his eyes but they stayed shut.

“I love you too, I love you so much, Daryl. We both know I’d have never made it this far without you, not just because you protected me all these years but because you made this world worth living in too.” You told him, desperately hoping for him to wake up but he didn’t move. “Please Daryl, you can’t do this, I won’t do this without you, please.”

Your sobs filled the shack as Daryl refused to wake up. There was nothing left to believe in and yet you still prayed to any force, any god, anything that would listen that you could keep your promise, that the group would find you and Daryl would be just alright. He had to be because you weren’t sure how you were supposed to go on without him.

By the time you heard the sound of boots outside you sobbed even harder, you couldn’t say how long had passed since you found Daryl but his breathing had gone faint not too long ago and you were both freezing, the small shack and your lack of jacket doing nothing to ward off the winter chill.

“Told you we’d be alright.” You whispered to Daryl even as he stayed motionless, letting your cold lips press against the scar on his forehead. “We’ll be alright.”

“Help him.” You pleaded with Rick once the door opened, his eyes soft and sympathetic as he nodded, gesturing for Maggie to help you stand whilst he got Daryl.

You made a noise of protest when you felt yourself being moved away from Daryl but were quietly shushed as a warm arm wrapped around your shoulder and led you out of the small shack you’d found.

When Maggie led you out though you couldn’t help but look around, noticing that there were no monsters out here, not anymore, just the wide stretch of trees that towered over you, full but still not able to block the rising sun and you let your gaze fall to Daryl.

He would be alright.

The two of you were placed in the back of the car where you pulled him close, brushing his hair with numb hands and letting yourself relax as you were finally on your way home.

It took a couple of days for Daryl to wake up, you hadn’t moved from his hospital bed, sleeping in the chair and not caring how uncomfortable it was, not when the other option was to leave Daryl whilst you slept in your bed alone, without him. The others had tried to get you to leave but you refused, wanting, needing to be here when he woke up.

When he did open his eyes it was when the sun was just beginning to rise over Alexandria, the golden rays shining into the hospital room and making it look less cold, less unwelcoming.

Daryl’s eyes found you straight away and he let himself take a moment to just look, to watch as you played absentmindedly with the necklace around your neck with one hand whilst the other held his, your thumb brushing soothingly across his knuckles. He could see the dark circles formed under your eyes and knew you hadn’t gotten much sleep since being rescued but he couldn’t blame you much there, whenever it was you in his place nobody could drag him away from you.

Despite looking exhausted and despite clearly having been crying at some point during the night Daryl couldn’t help but think you looked more beautiful than ever and he gave your hand a gentle squeeze, smiling as surprise filled your face as your head shot up to look at him, both of you soaked in the morning sunlight.

“I’m alright.” Daryl said first, watching as a smile spread across your face as you chuckled breathlessly.

“You’re alright.” You confirmed, unable to stop your smile from widening. “We’re alright.”

“Are we?” Daryl couldn’t help but ask, remembering his confessions to you when he had doubted if he would open his eyes again, his only thoughts being how much he needed to tell you and how much he hated that he was going to leave you alone.

“I meant what I said, I love you, I love you so much. Without you I wouldn’t have wanted to make it this far into this world but having you with me, it makes everything else worth it. I love you and you were right, we should have said it earlier.” You told him honestly, watching as his lips pulled into a smile reserved just for you.

“I love you too, I know we didn’t start great but what we got now, I love that, I love getting to wake up with you every morning and sleepin’ at your side every night. I love you, Y/N/N, I’d tear the whole world apart for you.” Daryl said, feeling lighter than he had in years now that it was finally out there, now that he finally knew where he stood with you. “Can’t wait to go home with you.”

If you were asked to describe your relationship with Daryl you would have said it was simple. It was the simplest thing in the world, you loved him and he loved you. It didn’t matter that that hadn’t always been the case, not now, not when he was finally given the all clear and the two of you practically fell onto the couch, Daryl pulling you close against his good side, your head against his chest with his heartbeat in your ear. It was the simplest thing in the world when he pulled you close and pressed your lips together, it was simple in the way he held your hand and you brushed strands of hair from his face.

It was simple because you had made it out of the woods and it had been enough for you and Daryl to finally say how you felt, to say the words that had been held back for so long. Even if nothing really changed between you except for the fact you knew how his lips felt against yours or that you knew every part of his body and he did yours, except for the fact you finally knew how the words I love you sounded coming from the other. It was all so simple and even if it had taken years longer than it needed you had finally got there and everything was alright, the two of you had each other and it was more than enough.

Daryl Dixon Taglist (Click the link in my bio to add yourself!) -  

@canadailluminate , @cinderellacauseshebroke, @black-rose-29, @classyunknownlover, @levisbloodcut, @mystic-writings, @lizamango,  @kaitieskidmore1, @fangirl-and-her-fantasies, @mrslizzyolsen, @lolmxria, @ladykxxx08, @caysophia, @xxchaotic, @nameless-ken, @ukai-hoe, @avengersbabe13,  @gypsytraveler86-blog, @lucyysthings, @bubsonnobx , @eddiefrickenmunson, @valluvsu,  @fakesocialmediaa, @ellablossom-blog​, @dumb-fawkin-bitch,  @odin-hatesu,  @nashja, @alexxavicry, @deathjawd, @annabellefrances1, @spideysimpossiblegirl,  @annaaaa14237, @top1bbgloak, @handsupforamiracle, @irishavengersassemble, @father-violet, @kitten-xoxxo, @mirasantidotes, @yarrystyleeza, @anjelicajoyce, @cinnamonmurda, @thunder-ki, @beepboopbeetroot, @devilacot​

Thank you so much for reading!🤎

Fearless Masterlist

Fearless -

Fifteen -

Love Story - Loki x Reader

Hey Stephen -

White Horse - 

You Belong With Me -

Breathe -

Tell Me Why -

You’re Not Sorry -

The Way I Loved You -

Forever & Always -

The Best Day - 

Change - 

Jump Then Fall -

Untouchable -

Come In With The Rain -

Today Was A Fairytale -

If This Was A Movie -

You All Over Me - 

Mr Perfectly Fine -

We Were Happy -

That’s When - 

Don’t You -

Bye Bye Baby - 

Teardrops On My Guitar

Click here for my masterlist.

Click here to add yourself to my taglist.

Prompt - ‘'I wonder if he knows he's all I think about at night.’

Notes - Making my way through Taylor Swift’s albums so if you want a fic for any song that I haven’t done yet send me a message!🤎

Click here to see which songs I’ve already done and which songs are free!

Click here to see who I write for!

For as long as you could remember it had always been you and Peter, other friends came and went throughout the years but you and Peter had always been a constant in each other’s lives. You had gone through everything together, when your family’s business went bankrupt and you had to live with the Parker’s for a few months, when Peter’s parents died and he had chosen you to run away to. Every big moment, every little moment, no matter the memory Peter was almost always in it.

You never thought you’d have to imagine a life without Peter, it always seemed such an impossible thought. You were the best of friends, there were no secrets between either of you, you told each other everything.

Which was great for years, it worked well for the two of you, you knew the other better than you knew yourself. It was nice knowing you always had someone to confide in, no problem too big or small to share.

And yet now you hated the fact that nothing was kept a secret between the two of you, you hated the fact that you meet up with Peter every day before school, hated that it was so easy to forget that the rest of the world existed, right up until you walked through the doors and his gaze immediately sought her out.

Gwen Stacy.

Gwen Stacy who was top of every class, Gwen Stacy who was so stunningly beautiful you just knew you couldn’t ever even begin to compete with her. You didn’t stand a chance, not when you saw the way Peter looked at her, his expression completely softening, the way his lips pulled into an unconscious smile every time she walked into a room, the way he couldn’t walk into one without glancing around for her.

You didn’t stand a chance.

And because there were no secrets between you and Peter you got to hear all about his crush on her when he remembered you existed. Ok, so maybe that wasn’t fair, it wasn’t like Peter shut down on you whenever she was around but he always had an eye on her.

You and Peter always walked home together, usually hanging around in his bedroom since Aunt May was at work so it left the two of you alone. You didn’t know if you loved the alone time or hated it.

You couldn’t even remember when your own crush on Peter had developed, maybe it had always been there, there before you even really knew what a crush was, before you knew anything about relationships or love or any of those things. Maybe it had developed when you had a bad day and Peter was always there with open arms and ready to make a fool of himself if only to see you laugh again. Maybe it was in the way that there really wasn’t any distance between the two of you, whether it be with no secrets or the way you could crawl into the other's bed after sneaking in through the window and the other person didn’t react other than to make room and wrap their arms around the other. Maybe it was all the little things that seemed so insignificant to other people but you treasured so deeply that made you fall for him so easily.

It didn’t really matter when it happened though, only that it did. It happened and it hurt every day. You couldn’t even get a break on the weekends because whenever Peter came around Gwen always seemed to be the first topic on his lips.

And it wasn’t like you could say anything either, you couldn’t just demand he stop talking about her. Not without admitting you had feelings for him anyway and that wasn’t going to happen, not when you knew he didn’t feel anything for you. You would just have to sit and listen to him talk about her for hours at a time because you loved him and you couldn’t lose your friendship.

Still it hurt. It hurt when he asked you what you think he should do, how could he get her to notice him, what date ideas should he think of to ask her out. The worst of it was that you loved him so much you couldn’t even bring yourself to give him bad ideas, whenever he asked for your advice you gave him the best you could, gave answers you wished Peter would do for you, and you watched him use them on her.

You had gotten pretty good at faking a smile now around Peter, at pretending everything was ok until you were alone and you could let the hurt just hurt. It was so easy to picture you and Peter together too, nothing would change except the fact you’d know how his lips felt against yours, how his hand cupping your cheek to bring you closer would feel.

It didn’t matter how much you wanted to cry, not when you had to fake a laugh at his over dramatic love declarations that caused him to grin as he shoved you lightly, it didn’t matter because no matter how many damn stars you wished on nothing would change.

Sometimes you thought Peter knew, how could he not know that he was the reason you stayed up all night thinking about him, how could he not know that the reason for your tears was him, how was he so blind to the way you looked at him? If it were anybody else you’d think they knew but Peter wasn’t cruel, if he knew he wouldn’t be torturing you so much.

If you had thought things between you and Peter were hard when he was just pining after Gwen it was nothing compared to when he finally put all your advice to use and ended up getting together with her.

It was slow at first, you still saw Peter every day, still walked home together after school but over time it turned into less time together. You walked home together but after a few weeks Gwen joined you and you hated how kind she was, it’d be easier to hate her if she wasn’t so nice. Then it turned into you going straight home, not wanting to third wheel on them, not when it meant more time watching Peter look at Gwen like she was his whole world and you had somehow become nothing more than a passing thought, silently pleading for Peter to notice you.

It wasn’t much longer after that the time you and Peter spent together got less and less, no more hanging out after school, no more weekends together, no more sneaking into each other’s houses, no more sharing every thought that popped into your head.

That’s what hurt the most, the thing that left you crying silently to yourself each night. Peter had forgotten all about you and your heart hurt, it hurt so badly that you just wished you could stop feeling anything. It wasn’t even just Peter’s fault though, you wanted to blame him for it all but you were to blame too, you pulled away but Peter hadn’t caught you and pulled you back.

You hoped Gwen knew, you hoped she knew how lucky she was that she was the one that got to fall asleep in Peter’s arms, the safest place you’d ever been. You hope she knew how lucky she was that Peter had picked her to love, you hoped she would love him just as fiercely as he loved her, hoped she knew how lucky she was to be able to fall into those beautiful brown eyes and to know how his lips felt as he kissed her so softly like she was something to be treasured.

You really hoped she knew because you would never know.

Andrew Garfield’s Peter Parker Taglist (Click the link in my bio to add yourself!) -

@haroldpotterson​, @rottenstyx​, @powerpuffluuvv​, @filmsbyblair​, @cinderellacauseshebroke​, @black-rose-29​,  @chaoticevilbakugo​, @ppgrayson​, @onyourgoddamnleft​, @divanca2006​, @siriuslyfearless​, @levisbloodcut​, @alwaysclassyeagle​, @asherhunterx​, @ordinarylokix​, @carmellasworld​, @ellabellabus07​, @lokismidnight​, @maeve-7​, @benhardyslut​, @apolysius​, @jasontoddthezombie​, @instabull​, @qfton​, @honkroselyn​, @inflatabledinosaurs19​, @father-violet​, @rosesinmars​, @mystic-writings​,   @izzyyy-1​, @lizamango​, @beaconings​, @randomwriter1021​, @taylordidsomthingbad​, @kaitieskidmore1​, @aylauwuuniverse​, @hydeonysus​, @freeshavocadoooo​, @writeroutoftime​, @mrslizzyolsen​, @kosmic-klouds​, @idli-dosa​, @allthingsmarvellove​, @inas-thing​,  @xxchaotic​, @standarizedpumpkins​, @ukai-hoe​, @lucyysthings​ , @cwritesforfun​, @siriusstwelveyears​, @daisyfreshwhore​, @myguiltypleasures21​, @luluwinchester​, @polyglot-noodle​, @bubsonnobx​, @heyitsaloy​, @eddiefreakingmunson, @eddiefrickenmunson, @f-sant, @fairydxll​, @valluvsu, @sjprongs, @uwiuwi, @bookfrog242,  @ellablossom-blog, @alexparkxr, @instabull​, @ell0ra-br3kk3r,  @momoewn, @secretsthathauntus, @clairemsworld, @psychicbouquetgladiator, @evvy96, @pedritoswife, @iluvweasleys,  @navs-bhat, @nashja, @alexxavicry, @annabellefrances1, @myeyesandheartadjust, @countryday, @pretty-npeach, @harry-and-ouis28, @spideysimpossiblegirl, @definitelykyles, @handsupforamiracle, @nao1800, @imposter-27, @hoplessromantic17, @father-violet, @lunalovegood156

Thank you so much for reading!💛

my tears ricochet

Click here for my masterlist.

Click here to add yourself to my taglist.

Prompt - ‘And I can go anywhere I want, anywhere I want, just not home.’

Requsted - Yes - @fandomtrashwhore 🤎

You had been fighting in the Clone Wars for a long time now, in that time you had been mad, you had felt anger for all the men lost, all the civilians used and left without anything, you had felt rage at the helpless feeling, at how it seemed the war would never end. In the years of the Clone Wars you had felt a lot of emotions, intense and overwhelming ones, but never anything like this.

You were seething, it felt like white hot anger was running through your whole body, lighting you up, and you couldn’t let it show, not whilst you stood before the Council, not as you listened to them debate your future before you. They spoke freely, murmuring to each other about your actions, about attachments and your anger, how your path had become clouded with the Dark Side.

You wanted to laugh, you wanted to cry, you wanted to let the Force break out from where you were barely containing it and let it wreak havoc on the room as you stood there. You had pleaded with them, Force had you pleaded with them to hear you out but they weren’t listening. It was like their minds were already made up on the matter and they had just been waiting for you to mess up.

The worst part of this whole trial was that the one person you wanted to be on your side hadn’t even opened his mouth. Your eyes were locked onto Obi-Wan but he refused to look up at you, refused to meet your gaze and that might have hurt more than any punishment the Jedi Council could give you.

You and Obi-Wan had been close friends for years but with the war you had been partnered together, working closely side by side, fighting together and having each other's back every day.

It was no wonder you fell in love with the man.

You kept your feelings to yourself at first though because while you may not have cared much for certain ways of the Jedi, you knew Obi-Wan believed in the ways and you never wanted to put him in a position where he would have to choose between you or the Jedi, not when you knew you wouldn’t stand a chance against the Order.

That was until you had been captured and tortured, you couldn’t have said at the time just how long you’d been gone for, to you it had felt like years but Obi-Wan had told you, with tear filled eyes, that you’d be gone for a number of weeks.

When Obi-Wan had come for you all you could do was collapse into his arms, not helping him as he led you back to the ship and barely remembering him getting you to the medbay. The next time you opened your eyes the pain had lessened and Obi-Wan was sitting at your side, his hand in yours and that feeling, the feeling of his thumb brushing softly against you was enough to erase any remaining pain away.

It was a long journey back to Coruscant and you were only stuck in the medbay for the night before you received the all clear from the medical droid with orders to rest for a few days. Despite the clearance Obi-Wan insisted you share his room on the ship with him so he could watch over you.

You had hardly protested, unwilling to give up a night or two sharing a bed with Obi-Wan. In those two days everything between you seemed to shift, the whispered words in the middle of the night, Obi-Wan holding you close whilst he murmured how brave you were, the overwhelming fear he’d felt when he lost you.

Obi-Wan knew he could no longer deny his feelings for you, he’d always known but he tried desperately to shove them down, to ignore it because that was the Jedi way. Attachments were forbidden but with you gone he realised that was too late, he was already attached to you. He couldn’t stop himself, not when you looked up at him, looking at him like he was the only person in the galaxy.

He cupped your cheek and brushed his lips against yours, softly at first to give you a chance to pull away but it didn’t take long for the kiss to turn hungry and desperate, both of you making up for lost time as you clung to each other.

When you eventually pulled away Obi-Wan had tried to apologise, stammering out an explanation but for as legendary as he was with his words this time he could come up with nothing to say.

Whatever stuttered words Obi-Wan had managed to get out were cut off by you shushing him with another kiss before you both pulled away, Obi-Wan leaning his forehead against yours as he looked at you in wonderment.

Somehow you had been able to convince Obi-Wan that this was a good idea, whatever relationship came from these kisses would be good. You could both keep it away from the Council, keep it just yours and make sure it didn’t interfere with your jobs. Obi-Wan had nodded along with your words and let the relationship continue.

That had all been just over a year ago and now you were standing before him as the other Master’s held the fate of your future in their hands. You hardly recognised the man, not right now when he wouldn’t even meet your eyes.

He was the whole reason the Council was debating anyway. They had given you an order, Obi-Wan had been sent on a solo mission with half of the 212th whilst you were needed in another battle with the remaining battalion.

Mid battle you felt a shift in the Force and it wasn’t long after one of the clones had told you they heard through the comms that Obi-Wan had been taken. You hadn’t even waited for him to finish speaking, taking one of the smaller ships and a small squadron you left the battle and the planet behind, uncaring that it was an important battle, uncaring that winning it would gain the Republic a key partner and planet in the war.

You didn’t care, the Separatists could have the planet, they could have all the towns they’d burnt down, the only thing that mattered to you was Obi-Wan.

It hadn’t taken long for the Council to find out you had abandoned your post and were heading towards Rigantu. They had immediately demanded your presence through the comms and you cleared the room before connecting with them.

“The Battle on Creanti is too important, Y/L/N. We cannot risk it staying in Separatists hands, we need that planet.” Master Windu told you like one might talk to a child.

“And what of Obi-Wan? What are your plans for him? I’m the closest person to Rigantu, you know that as well as I do!” You snapped, sick of going round in circles with the Council.

“Obi-Wan will be fine, you can rescue him after you have completed your mission on Creanti.” Master Windu stressed and you chuckled humorlessly, the last time you had spoken to Obi-Wan he looked terrible but assured you he could last until you arrived.

You had been taken and tortured so long ago and Obi-Wan hadn’t hesitated to come for you, you were going to do the same whether the Council approved or not.

“It could be too late after my mission, Master.” You hissed the word, your tone full of venom and you watched as Master Windu’s eyes narrowed at you before he and Master Yoda were sharing a look.

“Forbidden from going to Rigantu, you are.” Master Yoda said after a long pause of silence where the two Master’s held a silent conversation. “Go back to Creanti, you will.”

“You cannot stop me, Master.” You told them with a calmness you didn’t feel. “Punish me if you must but I’m not leaving him to die out there. Not Obi-Wan.”

With that you ended the comm call and made your way through the ship. It was only an hour long trip to reach Rigantu and you spent most of that time desperately trying to find even a sliver of Obi-Wan’s force signature but never did.

It was maddening.

Eventually you arrived on the planet and had the ship set down next to the palace. Through intercepting Separatist comms you had managed to find where Obi-Wan was being held.

You barked orders at the men, used the Force to cause so much destruction, walls were torn down, cliffs crumbled and you tossed droids around wildly, uncaring about anything other than getting Obi-Wan back.

Once you were in the palace you heard people gasping as you led a squadron through, not holding back as you marched ahead, making quick work of anyone who stood in your way.

From the room you knew Obi-Wan was being held in you could hear pained grunts and muffled sobs like he was trying not to give his torturer the satisfaction of knowing how badly he was being hurt but couldn’t stop the noises when the pain was too much.

You strode down the hallway, taking out the droids in a matter of seconds before your lightsaber pierced through the locked door and you cut a circle into the metal, stepping through the second the door fell to the floor.

The person torturing Obi-Wan looked like a doctor, a few Separatist leaders in the room but you didn’t spare them much of a look. You just wielded the Force until it felt like something you had never felt, whereas the Force was usually Light and easy to manipulate this time it felt heavy and Dark.

You didn’t care though, not when it had Obi-Wan’s torturers falling to their knees, choking for air as an invisible Force cut off their air supply. You kept moving even as you clenched your fist, making your way over to Obi-Wan and gasping at the sight of him.

He was black and blue with bruises, burns covering the skin you could see cuts littered on him. That was the final push you needed to clench your fist harder, hearing the collective struggles come to a stop.

“I’ve got you.” You murmured, quickly undoing his shackles and gesturing for the men to help you lift him.

It took a while to get to the ship, Obi-Wan was dead weight at that point but that didn’t matter, he was still breathing even if they were shallow.

You could see Obi-Wan’s ship and made your way over to that, knowing there were med droids on board that you needed to get Obi-Wan to.

From there everything had been a blur, Obi-Wan was unconscious the whole journey back to the Temple but the med droid assured you he was stable, you were ripped away from him the moment your ship landed. Masters Windu and Yoda were waiting for you and told you that you were to stay in your quarters until they called you before the Council.

The days drove you mad, nobody would tell you anything, droids brought you meals and you weren’t allowed to see anyone. You were scared for Obi-Wan, all you wanted to know that he was ok.

The next time you saw him was when the Jedi Council convened and called you before them, which brought you to now. Obi-Wan looked better than he had the last time you had seen him, from what little you could see with the robe covering so much and his refusal to meet your eye.

Finally, after what seemed like a lifetime, Master Yoda cleared his voice and the room went silent. You could only look at him as you waited for the verdict.

“Punished, you will be.” Master Yoda said after a pause of silence, “To be expelled from the Jedi Order, you are.”

The words had barely left his mouth before you let out a slightly maniacal laugh, his words ringing in your ears as you stared down at him, shaking your head in disbelief.

“You’re throwing me out? I saved Obi-Wan’s life, you saw him, he wouldn’t have lasted as long as you wanted to wait! I saved him and you’re punishing me for it!” You exclaimed, jutting your chin out as Master Windu levelled you a cold hard look, one that would usually have you falling silent and complying with whatever order you’d been given but you figured there was little you could do to change their minds so what did you have to lose. “Surely you can see how ridiculous this is. We’re fighting a war, we need all the help we can get!”

“Trusted, you no longer are. Go, you will.” Master Yoda told you and you shook your head again.

You could have just walked away, the decision was made and you knew once the Council had decided on a matter that was it, really you should have left with grace and your dignity but you didn’t care for that.

There was only one thing you cared about and he was keeping his mouth firmly shut.

“You’re not even going to speak in my favour,” You laughed bitterly, finally addressing the man you loved, the man you were getting thrown out of the Order for. “I saved your life and you won’t say a word.”

Obi-Wan finally glanced up at you, a guilty, broken look on his face. He opened his mouth as if to say something but was cut off by Master Yoda clearing his throat causing Obi-Wan to look down. When you glanced over at Master Yoda you saw the mistrusting look on his face but it was gone just as quick as he turned to you and gestured towards the door.

“I have given my life to this Order!” You exclaimed, the rage you felt was unbearable, it felt like it was burning you from the inside out. “I followed your commands and played by your foolish rules for years and this is what I get! If this is the future then I sure as hell am not rooting for your success against the Separatists, you’re all as bad as each other.”

With that you turned on your heels, using the Force that was bubbling with anger to slam the doors open, the sound echoing around the chambers, before you stormed out with your head held high.

You went back to your rooms, the second the door slammed shut behind you, you let the rage explode, the Force spreading across the room just as Dark and angry as you felt and destroying everything around you. Everything that could break shattered, furniture, books, pictures, everything went flying leaving the room a mess and all you could do was scream, scream for the man that you loved more dearly than anything but who clearly didn’t love you back as much.

You don’t know how long you stayed there for, eventually falling to your knees but at some point you managed to pick yourself up off of the floor and packed a small bag. You didn’t know where you’d go, some outer rim planet perhaps, where you could lay low and decide what your next move was but you knew you had to be away from Coruscant.

So that’s what you did, you found a ship to a sleazy outer rim planet you had never even heard the name of and left Coruscant behind, looking out of the window and cursing the Order, cursing the man who hadn’t fought for you.

As you sat on the shuttle you felt a tear slide down your face but quickly wiped it away. Tears wouldn’t solve anything and you refused to cry over any of them, not when you had given your life to them and this is how you were repaid.

Your new life was…lonely. It was the only word for it but it was easy to turn that loneliness into pain and anger and feed the Darkness inside of you. Ever since the day you’d rescued Obi-Wan using means that weren’t Light you had grown obsessed with feeling the hum of the Dark Side, the anger you felt at the Order only made it easier to call upon the Darkness until you were wrapped around in it with no way out.

Even with this newfound Darkness growing inside you, dragging you further in with each new day, you could never shake your love for Obi-Wan. You’d tried to, Force knows it would have been easier if you could, but you’d never been able to turn your feelings for Obi-Wan off.

You still had plenty of old contacts, most still willing to talk to you as it seemed the Jedi Order were covering the fact you had been expelled, rumour has it they had told people you were on a top secret mission. You couldn’t help but laugh at that, they threw you out without a second thought but they were more than happy to cover up to make themselves look like the heroes.

Speaking of heroes, according to your contacts Obi-Wan was still playing the same unshakeable hero that everyone knew, still flying around the galaxy as he did whatever the Council asked of him. Here you were on some nowhere planet, life ruined and Obi-Wan was saving face so he could still be Jedi Master Kenobi.

You might still have loved the man but Force if it didn’t make you angry thinking about how Obi-Wan had refused to even stand up for you. The worst thing was you knew that if the situation was different, if it had been Obi-Wan stood up there alone and expelled from the Order, you knew you’d have stood from your chair and walked out with him. You’d have done that for him and he hadn’t even been able to look at you.

The anger you felt just continued to feed the Dark Side, before you knew it when you looked into the mirror you were staring at eyes you didn't recognise, they were yellow and angry.

This is what the Council had done to you.

Obi-Wan felt like he was losing his mind. He might have played the perfect soldier, continuing to go wherever the Jedi sent him, continuing to fight and win battles before readying himself for the next mission. He might have looked like the same person everyone had known before you left but he wasn’t.

He was constantly running on too little sleep. Whenever he did manage to drift off it wasn’t ever long before he woke with your name on his lips, dreams of you alone somewhere in the galaxy, dreams of you telling him how much you hated him. His waking hours weren’t much better, you seemed to be everywhere, he couldn’t escape you. He’d look out into a crowd and see your face in it, he could hear you whispering, taunting him as he did what was expected of him.

You truly were haunting his every waking and sleeping moment. He walked around with the weight of his regret on his shoulders every day, wishing things were different, wishing you had stayed, wishing he had gone with you.

He just wished everything was different.

It was a big galaxy, you could go anywhere you wanted now you were no longer a part of the Jedi Order. You had long since left that small planet and moved on to the next and when you tired of that you moved on. You could go wherever you wanted and yet you couldn’t go to the one place you wanted to be most: home.

You wanted to go home.

Not to Coruscant or the Temple, though that is where you have been since you were a child. No, home to you was wherever Obi-Wan was, it didn’t matter if it was some occupied Separatist planet or the Negotiator, wherever he was it always felt like home. It was the one place you wanted to be more than anything.

Now you were alone in the galaxy, moving from planet to planet with nothing but your anger keeping you going.

Obi-Wan couldn’t believe what he was hearing, standing before Master Yoda and Master Windu, both of their expressions deadly serious.

“I will not kill her.” Obi-Wan finally choked out, shaking his head in utter disbelief at what they were asking of him. “You cannot ask me to do that, Master. I won’t, despite all that has happened she is still my oldest and dearest friend.”

That’s not all you were of course, to Obi-Wan you were still his whole world, he still loved you more dearly than he had ever thought possible. He had his loyalties to the Order though, the Order he had sworn his very life to. He never wanted to have to choose between you or the Order, desperately believing he could keep the two apart but he should have known better really.

“The girl you knew is long gone, Obi-Wan. Our sources assure us she has fallen to the Dark Side and we need to stop her. We can’t have more Sith when we’re already struggling to fight this war.” Master Windu said coldly, showing no sympathy for Obi-Wan.

“Questioned, your loyalties are. Whispers of your attachments, there are.” Master Yoda said. “The Jedi Master you are, prove to us.”

“You question my loyalties? I let her go, did I not? Surely there is another way to prove myself, I cannot kill Y/N.” Obi-Wan pleaded, feeling his world giving out around him.

“Obi-Wan, we will not ask again.” Master Windu said as he pressed a chip into Obi-Wan’s hands. “This is where she is, go to her, do your mission and return to us. This is the only way to ensure victory for the Republic.”

Obi-Wan let out a shaky sigh, taking the chip from the other Jedi and turning to leave the room, missing the look shared between Masters Yoda and Windu.

By the time Obi-Wan found you you were already waiting for him, lightsaber in your hand but not yet lit. Obi-Wan made his way over to you with heavy feet before he stopped across from you.

From here he could see it was true, you really turned to the Dark Side, the Sith yellow eyes made him shudder as he recalled your Y/E/C eyes looking up into his, looking at him with such warmth that was missing now.

“They sent you to kill me.” You said by way of greeting and Obi-Wan nearly recoiled at the coldness in your tone.

“Stop this.” He pleaded with you, desperate for you to listen to him. “It doesn’t have to end this way, let me help you.”

“Help me?” You laughed darkly, the two of you know slowly walking in a circle around each other. “You had your chance to help me, Obi-Wan, all those months back and instead you sat there in silence as they decided my fate. This is my fate, this is what they made me.”

You lit your lightsaber and swung for him, Obi-Wan’s lightsaber igniting and crashing into yours. You were strong but Obi-Wan was able to throw you off him, pushing you to the side so you had to roll to stand back up just as he took his first swing.

It went on like that for a few minutes, the two of you fighting each other, such a stark contrast to the way you used to fight side by side.

“You can kill me, Obi-Wan.” You told him, your tone softer than it had been moments before and you took the way Obi-Wan paused to get another blow in before continuing. “But you will always miss me. You can lie to them, you can lie to yourself but you never could lie to me.”

Both your lightsabers smacked into each other again, Obi-Wan gaining the advantage as he pushed you down, managing to use the Force to kick your legs out from beneath you as he sent you to the floor.

“Stop this!” He pleaded with you but you still held firm, knowing you were stuck but pushing your lightsaber up into his anyway.

“You know, you used to tell me I was brave for fighting for what I believed in? I believed in us, I fought for that but you didn’t.” You hissed, the heat of the lightsaber so close to your face and the effort of fighting Obi-Wan caused sweat to pool on your forehead.

“Did I deserve any of this? What did I do that was so terrible?” You asked him desperately, feeling how he shuddered at your words. “They threw me out because of you because I chose to save you! I couldn’t let you die, Obi-Wan!”

“Y/N, you knew the Jedi’s rules on attachment, we both promised we wouldn’t do anything to make them aware of our relationship.” Obi-Wan told you and you used the new wave of anger to shove him away from you, rolling out from under him and getting back to your feet, wasting no time in bringing your lightsaber down on him.

“But they’re not aware, are they?” You hissed out as your lightsabers continued hitting into each other. “Because whilst I got dragged through the flames you sat there and kept silent!”

“Do you truly think I didn’t fight for you?” Obi-Wan yelled as he brought his lightsaber down on you, again gaining the upper hand and forcing you down, trapping you between a boulder and his lightsaber. “Y/N I spent more time than I could count pleading and bargaining with them.”

“And yet you never told them you were as attached as I am.” You forced out, straining against the weight of Obi-Wan’s lightsaber as it came closer. “Did I deserve this, Obi-Wan, all the hell the Order gave me?”

“I’m sorry.” Obi-Wan whispered, you could feel him shaking from where he was pining you in place and you took a deep breath.

Even now, even with everything the Order was making him do you knew he wouldn’t leave. You knew you’d never have the man you loved back, not when he was so blindly loyal to the Jedi Order.

“I love you, Obi-Wan, I swear I love you.” You whispered before using the Force to turn your lightsaber off, Obi-Wan’s immediately falling forward into you and as you faded you heard his cry.

Obi-Wan fell to his knees, pulling your body onto his lap as he cried for you, he cried for the way your story had ended, he cried and cursed and screamed at the sky until he was too numb for anything else.

Somehow he managed to drag himself up, he picked your body up, refusing to leave you behind on some planet, you deserved better than that.

You deserved better than it all.

It was only a few days later Obi-Wan was wrapping a warm cloak around his shoulders, pulling the hood up and remembering how you had been the one to gift it to him. He made his way through the Temple with his head down, Anakin and Ahsoka were at the main entrance waiting for him and he didn’t speak as the three of them walked together.

The room was filled with people, some were crying, many were clinging to each other and Obi-Wan felt his own composure slip as tears he had tried holding back slid freely down his cheeks.

He couldn’t bring himself to walk to the front of the room where your body lay, he couldn’t do it, he had already seen your dead body enough to haunt him for a lifetime and it did. Every time he closed his eyes he saw you dead in his lap, every time he tried to sleep he awoke after less than an hour, a curse and your name on his lips as he dreamed of Sith eyes that used to be so bright, he dreamt about your last words, the love confession that he never got to return.

He swore some days he could hear you when he was awake, the words echoing in his head. Some days it felt like you were taunting him, like today he could practically hear you asking why he was at your wake when he was the one who killed you.

He tried blaming the Order at first, Masters Yoda and Windu had been the ones to give the order but he was the one who followed it. He tried to blame you for leaving, for letting your anger turn to Darkness but he knew you weren’t to blame. He regretted not walking out with you that day.

He was so full of pain, drunk on it and desperately wished it would end but it never would, this was his punishment, to live with this pain. He was a shell of the man he once was, nothing more than a ghost anymore because it may have been you who had died, killed by his own hands, but you might as well have killed him too because he had died on that planet right alongside you.

Obi-Wan had tried to forget you, he tried to bury himself into the war efforts in an attempt to forget about all the good years the two of you had had together but it was no use. 

You were always there with him, haunting him until the day he died.

Obi-Wan Kenobi Taglist (Click the link in my bio to add yourself!) -

@paintlavillered, @captainamericasdaughter15, @bubsonnobx , @starkillerrr, @heyitsaloy, @fall-08, @punkpirate82, @bookfrog242, @folklorianpixie, @shadowheads-shitshow, @dumb-fawkin-bitch, @chiaraxtargaryen​, @myeyesandheartadjust​, @evvy96, @crazywitchbitch, @little-diable, @navs-bhat, @alexxavicry, @asherhunterx, @myeyesandheartadjust, @top1bbgloak​, @kpopperbree123​, @audrie-bryant​, @pank0w​, @bitchineedfuckingtherapy​

Thank you so much for reading! 🤍

You’re Losing Me

Click here for my masterlist.

Click here to add yourself to my taglist.

Prompt - ‘Every morning I glared at you with storms in my eyes. How can you say that you love someone you can't tell is dying?’

Notes -  I won’t lie I don’t know if House still has an active fandom but I just started watching it so have this, also the way this song was leaked like four hours ago and I immediatly jumped to google docs

It seemed impossible when you had first realised how you felt, falling in love with a man twice your age, a man who was your boss no less, it had been an impossibly bad, stupid idea. You hadn’t planned on acting on it, the man was meant to be your mentor but he was so unlike anybody you had ever met before, so bluntly honest, never beating around the bush, there was something so charmingly arrogant about how that you just couldn’t help but like.

So it went on for months, months where you silently pined for him, sneaking glances at him as he watched his soaps in his office, stealing moments together as he pulled you into an empty room as he avoided clinic duty and instead quizzed you on the latest patient. You had hoped that ignoring how you felt would just make your feelings go away, make you realise this was just a silly crush and yet nothing ever changed.

Nothing changed until the man started seeking you out more, he started to look to you first for answers, it was you he found first to talk about cases or music or whatever else came to his mind. He wasn’t open but he did begin sharing little pieces of himself with you, nothing overly personal to most people but when it was Gregory House sharing those tidbits they felt big, they felt important, like it was this closed off man's way of trying to open himself up, to give something in return for all you shared with him.

You knew as you spent more time with him that it wasn’t just a silly crush anymore, it wasn’t just some admiration that had gotten out of hand, you were falling for the man and you tried not to let yourself hope that he was falling for you too. Then you’d see him talking to Wilson, the two of them sat together, Wilson looking hopeful whilst House frowned, his eyebrows furrowing together before both their gazes found you and his frown turned into a small twitch of the lips.

Neither of you acted on it for a while but the pining and the tension eventually became too much for both of you. You couldn’t exactly say who snapped first, only that the case you had been working had lasted for an exhaustingly long week and you were both pent up with far too many emotions, add the bottle of something strong from his office and it wasn’t a surprise when you found yourself pressed against the wall with House’s lips on yours.

From there on nothing had been defined for a month or two, you both spent more time together, slept together, went for meals together, yet nothing was ever defined. It had driven you crazy, not knowing if House wanted something more from you or if you were simply a way to burn off steam after work.

Eventually you had given into your need to know, waiting until you were alone, you pulled against his chest, tucked up in bed together. You hadn’t been able to get the words out, mouth opening and closing, your fingers distractedly playing with him as you tried to collect your thoughts.

House never missed anything though and if he could read other people well without ever needing to meet them then he could read you like the words of his favourite book. He had been the one to start the conversation, telling you to say whatever you needed to say and listening as you stammered out the question of what were you.

House had paused, it wasn’t like he wasn’t expecting it, of course he had been waiting for it and yet he still had to pause. He had to remember all his conversations with Wilson, the ones where he had promised to give this a real go because his feelings were real. It wasn’t easy, he had closed himself off for years, never letting himself get attached, never letting himself fall.

Of course you came along and ruined that but he had never been able to find it in himself to be mad. He was glad it was you he got to try again with, he was glad it was you who showed him that he wasn’t totally ruined.

He may not have understood why you wanted to be with a man twice your age, a man who was explosive and closed off, a man who needed drugs just to make it through a day, a man who was so far beyond damaged he couldn’t remember a time he had been whole. He didn’t understand it but he wasn’t taking it for granted.

He told you as much and you let yourself fall a bit more for him at the honesty, at the trust he had given you. From there on, you hated how cliched it sounded, but everything just seemed to have fallen into place.

You went out together and called them dates, House let himself relax, stopped analysing every word he said, stopped debating whether he was enough for you and instead let himself slowly open himself up to you. You hadn’t been hurt the way House had, sure your last relationship had broken you for a while but you were trusting House to not do the same, you didn’t have the same insecurities so whilst you fell first it took House a little longer but he fell in love with you too.

It was good for the first few years, not perfect because nothing was ever perfect. You worked together and you went home together, sometimes that was too much, sometimes a case was too much and you couldn’t leave it at the door, instead dragging it in and letting it linger but everything always resolved itself, everything was good.

You fell hard and so did he. You moved into his place even after he offered to find somewhere else but you had just smiled at him and told him his house felt like home and you’d love to move in with him.

You couldn’t say how many nights had been spent with the two of you on his sofa, his arms wrapped around you with you against his chest, holding you close as you spoke softly to one another, how many nights had been spent listening to him play the piano that sat in the corner or listening to music filling the room after a long day where no words were needed.

It was good.

So where had things started to fall apart? When had that love turned into something else, something that seemed more for show than anything else. When had you gone from sitting in bed as House read aloud, the lamp lighting the room with a soft orange glow before the two of you drifted off in each other’s arms to you staying awake long after House had fallen asleep, staring into the silence and wondering what had happened, wondering if time was running out for you.

It had started with little things, things you hadn’t even noticed until months later. He brushed you off more, not just at work but outside too, suddenly your opinion didn’t seem as important. Then it escalated to him cancelling plans which evolved into him forgetting to cancel plans, leaving you sitting alone in a crowded restaurant, having to keep the tears out of your eyes as you left realising you’d been stood up again.

It was when the sympathetic looks came that you couldn’t bear it, not from the strangers around you but from Cameron, Foreman and Chase. Each of them had warned you away from him at the start, told you House just wasn’t a relationship guy but you had ignored them and it was worth it, it had been worth it for the best years of your life.

Their sympathetic looks hurt, they could see something wasn’t right but their’s weren’t the one that cut deep. That honour belonged to Wilson. House trusted that man more than anyone and to see his fond looks turn sad and sympathetic, that’s when it hurt.

The only person who couldn’t seem to see that things were falling apart was House himself. The man who notices everything, the man who sees the smallest thing and pieces together an entire puzzle without any other parts, the man who spots and obsesses over every anomaly failed to notice how tired you were. He failed to see the way you were sick, sick of being tired, sick of feeling unwanted, sick of questioning what you had done and why you weren’t good enough and where things had gone wrong and why he didn’t love you anymore.

You were sick and he couldn’t see it or maybe he just wouldn’t admit it. He still said the words I love you even as you frowned, wondering how he could so easily say those words when he couldn’t even see you in front of him, couldn’t see how you were dying from how much everything hurt.

How did he miss the pain and anger and grief in your eyes as you glared at him in the morning, him so easily going about his day whilst he ignored you, gave you a little bit but never what he used to. He smiled and joked in front of everybody, the others whilst knowing something was wrong never knowing the extent because not even House seemed to realise what was happening.

It had been years and you had wanted so much more with him, you wanted to give him everything and yet House seemed content stuck where you were, happy to stay frozen in time. You wanted to beg him, fall to your knees and plead with him to do something, to see that he was losing you despite how badly you had always wanted him.

It felt like your heart was twisting and stuttering, sometimes beating too quickly that you were afraid it was going to push you over the edge and sometimes beating so slowly you thought you were already dead.

You wanted him to notice, you needed him to notice, to do something to fix it. He was a doctor, he was the one who always noticed everything, focusing and giving it his attention until the problem was fixed but when he looked at you he didn’t see a problem because these days he never looked for long enough.

The thing was House had always been the one to understand you, to know what you were thinking without you ever needing to vocalise it, he used to be able to take one look and understand everything about you. Now though it was like you were a stranger to him.

You didn’t want to lose him, you didn’t want to be in a world where you didn’t love him anymore but you were tired and drained and just sad. Sure you may still fall asleep in the same bed but he never pulled you into him anymore, suddenly all the songs that he played sounded infinitely sadder and you nearly laughed at how you felt like those songs, becoming sadder and sadder as each day passed.

You had given him so much, you had never complained once about the drugs, accepting that was who he was, you had never given a second thought to his leg even when he tried to use it as an excuse to keep you from loving him, you loved his personality where most people struggled to even accept it.

You had given him the best of you and now it felt like everything was too far gone to bring back to life.

“Can I talk to you?” You asked softly as you stepped into House’s office, already having spoken to Cuddy and knowing you were doing what was best for you even if you did feel like your heart had exploded in your chest.

“Little busy right now.” He told you, barely taking his eyes away from the board in front of him, sparing you half a glance and missing the way your eyes were teary and red. “Can it wait?”

You took a shaky breath, wanting him to notice, wanting him to realise everything was broken. Where the man before you had once felt like home, had felt like he had been made by the universe for you to find, tied together with an invisible string to lead you to each other, now it felt like that string had been slashed, cutting off your blood flow and oxygen and stopping your heart all together.

“No, it can’t.” You said and watched as he huffed before turning to you, leaning against the desk to look at you and still not seeing something was wrong. Your lips quivered as you forced yourself not to cry, even as you felt the sting of tears returning. “I’m leaving.”

“You’re leaving?” He asked, raising an eyebrow at you, not seeming too alarmed.

“Yes, I’m leaving. I spoke to Cuddy and handed my resignation in and-”

“Wait a second, you’re leaving the hospital? Why? You love it here.” House said, his eyebrows knitting together as he tried to solve the puzzle in his head.

“I’m leaving New Jersey.” You interrupted his thought process, watching as he stared at you dumbly. “I already spoke to my parents, they’re letting me move back home for a little bit until I find something else but I’m leaving.”

“I don't understand.” He told you and it hurt, it hurt how genuinely confused he sounded. He really hadn’t figured it out, he hadn’t cared enough to notice everything had gone to pieces.

“I know you don’t.” You told him because it was all you could say, you knew he didn’t understand but he should, he should love you enough to see understand.

Do something, you pleaded in your head, say something, lose something, risk something, choose something, choose me.

You needed him to choose you, needed him to swallow his pride, to lose it for just a few minutes, risk being emotional, risk something, you needed him to choose you, all you wanted was for him to want you, to need you the way you needed him.

“So that’s it?” He said and your lips thinned as you fought back a sob.

Of course he wasn’t going to fight for you, of course he wasn’t going to choose you, not when he had been pulling away for so long without even realising it. Or maybe he did know what he was doing and he had just been seeing how long it would take for you to crumble and break.

“That’s it.” You forced out, somehow managing to keep the flood of tears from falling even as you felt the last of your heart stop.

“Right, well then, if that’s everything I have somewhere to be.” House told you coldly, not giving you a chance to say anything as he grabbed his cane and walked past you and out of his office, down the hallway without so much as glancing back.

Alone in his office you let the tears fall down, a hand to your mouth as you tried to muffle your sobs, not sure you’d be able to come back from this one. It hurt too much, all you had wanted was for him to fight for you and he didn’t even want to.

How had things gone so wrong?

Doctor Gregory House Taglist - 

New character, use the link in my bio to add yourself

Thank you so much for reading!💜

Got You Back

Click here for my masterlist.

Click here to add yourself to my taglist.

Prompt - Forehead kiss whilst cuddling

You’d known the Bad Batch long before Order 66 was executed, they joined you so much on missions that at some point they just never left and came apart of your battalion. The only time they left your side was when they were called back to Kamino or another battalion needed help with the impossible.

Over the years you had grown close with all of them, Hunter stood by your side and helped you command the 429th, the two of you had spent many sleepless nights together pouring over new intel and strategies. You and Crosshair were close though people looking in at your friendship would doubt that, even though your friendship mostly consisted of the two of you poking at each other’s buttons you were also the first to stand up for the other, always willing to take a blaster shot or punches thrown by the enemy. It had taken Tech the longest to warm up to you and you him, he hadn’t been purposefully hostile but he had never been all too good with new people or breaks to his routine and suddenly he was on a ship surrounded by regs who he had never had the best experience with anyway and you, a complete stranger. Overtime though the two of you did bond and whenever Tech wanted somebody to talk to he usually sought you out first.

As much as you loved them all it was Wrecker who had taken the place as your favourite, not that you’d ever admit it out loud. You didn’t need to honestly, it seemed everybody knew.

Wrecker was something else, at first you had been weary of him. There was no time for introductions when the batch first showed up, the battle already well underway and you and your men losing spectacularly.

One minute you had been surrounded by droids, the Force and your lightsaber both desperately trying to fight them off and the next there was a loud boom as an explosion went off and then Wrecker had easily dealt with the remaining droids on you with nothing but a loud laugh, giving you a grin before moving onto more droids.

Turns out after getting to know him that the giant of a man was really a gentle, caring one, always aware of his strength and never using it against anybody but the enemy, not even when you had heard some of the regular clones under your command giving the batch a hard time.

Once they started joining you frequently you let yourself get closer and closer to Wrecker, finding out you had more in common with him than just about anyone on the ship. You found yourself gravitating to him all the time, whether it be seeking him out before a mission when you were worried and felt the weight of the whole battalion on your shoulders or after a mission were you let him pull your aching body into a crushing hug in which you both assured yourself the other had made it through another mission safe and alive.

At some point Wrecker had managed to pull you into training with him somehow. You had finally given into his insistence that you needed to learn how to fight without your lightsaber. He wasn’t wrong, you were highly skilled with your lightsaber, easily a worthy opponent but there were times it got lost in battle and you had only yourself to rely on. So you let him teach you how to throw punches and to deflect attacks until you were an aching puddle on the floor. The only thing that made the whole thing worth it was seeing Wrecker break a sweat as he grinned at you.

You had never thought that his training would come in as helpful as it had, a year or so later you found yourself on a rare campaign without the batch’s assistance, they had been needed elsewhere to aid Master Billaba.

You had had a bad feeling about this mission since they had left but you knew the war was coming to an end, Master Kenobi was on his way to defeat Grievous as you headed to your own mission. There was nothing to be done for your nerves though and you desperately tried to push them aside without Wrecker’s steady presence assuring you everything would be just fine.

It turned out your bad feeling had been right.

You found yourself staring down the barrel of a blaster held by the Captain, the rest of your battalion following his lead and aiming their own at you. It was after a long battle, one in which you had lost your lightsaber again and you had nothing but the Force to help you.

You weren’t entirely sure how you had managed to get on a ship, the past hour nothing but a blur but what you did know was that it was Wrecker’s training that had saved you. All that time spent working together until he was satisfied you could hold your own had finally paid off and it was the only reason you were alive.

It sent an ache through you thinking about Wrecker. You wanted to comm him but you weren’t sure how widespread this thing with the Clones was, what if the batch wanted to kill you? You weren’t sure you could deal with the heartbreak of losing them.

You had decided on heading back to Coruscant when Obi-Wan’s message came through, warning you away from the Temple and Coruscant, your heart breaking as the message played on a loop until you forced yourself to turn it off with shaky hands, turning your comm off with it.

You didn’t know where to go, the war had been lost, nowhere was safe. As you sat in your ship you wracked your brain for safe places only the Jedi knew about and then remembered a place you’d heard some of the Master’s speak about.

It was sketchy but you figured if the Sith had truly taken over then they wouldn’t start with planets like this, it should have left you with plenty of time to come up with another plan before they arrived.

Finding Cid had been an unpleasant enough experience, you couldn’t figure what the Jedi were doing working with somebody like her but there wasn’t anyone left to question. When she tried to drag you into her sketchy dealings you had walked right back out of her office, you were alone in the galaxy but you weren’t that desperate for help that would probably come back to bite you one day.

You left with her threats of calling the Empire following you out the door and then paused once you were out, wondering what in the stars your plan was. Staying in Ord Mantell was probably your best option provided Cid didn’t make good on her promises. You could stay in your ship and work odd jobs to build enough credits for something more secure but until then it looked like you were stuck.

Many days passed until you stopped bothering to keep track of how long it had been since the war was lost, since you were left alone with no home to go back to and no friends, no Wrecker. You hadn’t turned your comm on since that day, there was no point, everyone you knew was either dead or wanted you dead.

“Hey you!” Cid called as they turned to leave her office with a mission, not sure how willing they were to trust her but needing the credits. “You mentioned the Jedi.”

“Um yes I did, what of it?” Echo asked as they turned back around to face her.

“There was a girl poking round here not too long ago, said she was a Jedi but she didn’t stay long, not willing to make a friend outta me. You reckon you know her?” The batch all turned to each other, Hunter hated the hopeful look that spread across Wrecker’s face.

It had been a while since that day and when you hadn’t answered any of their comm calls Hunter knew what had happened to you. Wrecker had been devastated, not only did they have the guilt of leaving Crosshair behind but Wrecker was heartbroken over your loss, not that Wrecker ever accepted what had happened, he still sat at the comm every day and called you, refusing to give up hope that you were alive. Hunter heard him crying softly into Lula most days, Omega having pressed the doll into the giant’s chest when Tech brought your name up and he got teary eyes.

He still wasn’t dealing with it well, Hunter heard him crying more nights than not, dark circles under his eyes showing that he hadn’t been sleeping well without you. Hunter didn’t know what to do, he hated seeing Wrecker so distraught, if he could have taken his pain on he’d have done it in a heartbeat.

Omega had been an angel, Wrecker loved the kid straight away and she might have been the only thing keeping him together. Wrecker had told her so many stories about you, Omega always content in his lap, eager to hear of your grand adventures together and nobody said anything about the tears that slid down Wrecker’s cheeks.

Seeing him now made Hunter’s fist clench, Cid hadn’t known what she was doing brining the Jedi up but seeing the bright hopeful look on his brother’s face made him want to punch something knowing full well it was going to hurt just as badly as it had the first time when it turned out it wasn’t you.

Wrecker let himself get his hopes up though, he’d always known you couldn't be dead. Even if something had happened and you’d been without your lightsaber he knew he had taught you enough to survive without it. He tried to justify the unanswered comm calls by telling himself your comm had probably just gotten broken during the battle and you hadn’t been able to get to a new one yet.  

He didn’t miss the sympathetic looks he got from his brothers and Omega but he ignored them, unwilling and unable to give up one you. You would find your way back to each other, you always did.

“What’d she say her name was?” Wrecker asked eagerly, stepping towards Cid with a growing smile.

“She didn’t say her name, refused to say much of anything once I asked her to go on a run for me.” Cid said and they watched Wrecker’s shoulder slump down. “But I do know she never left the planet, matter of fact as a show of my goodwill I’ll tell you where she’s staying.”

“Yeah, tell us!” Wrecker pleaded, perking right back up.

“Alright, alright! She’s staying in her ship, down in hangar bay 18.” Cid told them and Wrecker was already out the door as Cid called after him. “Don’t say I don’t do nothing for you boys!”

Hunter and Echo shot each other sad smiles, knowing full well how this was going to end. They stood still for a moment, Tech sighing softly as the three of them watched Wrecker practically run out of Cid’s with Omega following closely behind.

“It could be her right?” Echo asked though the tone of his voice didn’t have much belief in his words.

“Unfortunately, the chances of this so-called Jedi being Y/N are highly improbable to impossible.”  Tech told them, his voice quiet as he adjusted his goggles.

“Come on, let’s check it out anyway.” Hunter said and gestured for them to follow the other two, already dreading the heartbreak Wrecker would experience all over again.

Wrecker arrived at the hangar bay moments before the rest of the batch caught up to him, pausing outside of bay 18 as he took a deep breath.

“Wrecker, I know you want it to be her, we all do but you have to prepare yourself for it being somebody else.” Echo told him gently, placing a hand on Wrecker’s bicep.

Wrecker turned to him with a shaky smile and nodded but he refused to let himself think it could be anyone else. It was going to be you, it had to be you.

“You ready Wrecker?” Omega asked with a smile, looking up at him.

Wrecker took one more deep breath and nodded again, smiling as Omega slipped her small hand into his and gave it a squeeze.

He led the way into the hangar bay and his breath caught in his throat as he recognised the ship the Republic had used. Everyone else took note too and felt their heart break a little more knowing it was only getting Wrecker’s hopes up.

Wrecker was the one to knock on the ship’s door and everybody waited anxiously for the door to open.

You had been on Ord Mantell for far too long, this place was everything you hated but you had no choice but to stay. It wasn’t swarming with troopers and that was the best you could do right now. You worked odd jobs and built up some credits, saving them for when it was time to flee, needing to be ready to do so at a moment's notice.

You had finally gotten back to your ship after a long day of manual labour but it was worth it for the credits that had been handed over to you at the end of it. You took a small ration bar out of the storage box and sat down heavily in your seat.

As you ate the small bar you couldn’t stop your thoughts wandering back to the same place they always did…Wrecker. Stars you missed him. Every day your heart ached at being away from him, at how you would never see him again, at how he was now nothing but a mindless droid following orders, it ached at knowing that you would never get the chance to tell him that he had been the one to save you, that you would never get to tell him you loved him.

You had known for a long time that you loved Wrecker but your loyalty to the Jedi Code had stopped you from ever telling him. That and the fact you were scared, you’d never been in love before and you weren’t certain that Wrecker would feel the same about you so it was easier to hide behind the Code and keep your feelings to yourself.

You regretted that now, hated the fact that you hadn’t been brave enough to tell him. You knew the chance to do so would never come around, not now that he was the Empire’s good soldier.

You’d have left the Order if Wrecker had asked you too, joined him and his brothers in the Marauder and fought alongside them. He had never asked though and you had had to be content with them joining you on your cruiser and staying for as long as they could.

Your thoughts were suddenly interrupted by a banging on the ship’s door and you startled in your seat, reaching over to grab a blaster in place of the lightsaber you had never managed to recover.

You stood up and headed over to the door, finger hovering over the button to open it. If it was the Empire they surely wouldn’t bother with niceties, preferring to force their way onto your ship instead. There was nobody else it could be though, the only person who knew you were staying on your ship was Cid and you weren’t exactly expecting her to stop by for a cup of caf any time soon.

You hesitated for another moment before raising your blaster and pressing the button.

There were several gasps as the door finally opened and you didn’t have a chance to take in your guests because suddenly you were being dragged into a bone crushing hug, one that had you tensing before your mind caught up and you recognised the arms holding you close.

“Wrecker?” You choked out, tears springing to your eyes as you pushed him away to make sure it was really him, blaster falling to the ground. “Stars, it’s really you.”

Wrecker was a mess, tears fell rapidly down his face as he pulled you back into his arms, feeling your fingers clawing into him as you gripped him tight. He had to watch himself, knowing he could crush you but he couldn’t loosen his grip if he tried, not when it felt like if he did you would disappear before him.

“I knew you were alive.” Wrecker mumbled into your hair, leaning down to rest his head against you as you sobbed into him. “Knew you’d be alright.”

“I thought you were gone!” You cried, pulling back only far enough to look up at him, shaky hands cupping his cheeks as you took him in.

“M’alright, ya don’t have to worry ‘bout me, I’m right here. Just glad I found you.” Wrecker told you, his voice softer than you had ever heard as he leaned down and pressed his forehead to yours.

The two of you stayed like that for a while longer before you both managed to pry yourselves away, though you didn’t go too far from each other. It was then you saw the others standing behind them, their own eyes shiny and cheeks stained with tear marks.

“Echo, Tech, Hunter! It’s so good to see you!” You exclaimed, meeting them halfway and letting Echo pull you into his own hug, him holding you close for a few moments before letting you go, squeezing your arm as he did.

“Good to have you back, Y/N/N.” Echo smiled, his voice shaky and you couldn’t help but laugh softly, the sound more like a sob as you nodded.

Tech was next, he wasn’t the greatest with physical affection but he still let you pull him into a soft hug and let himself rest his head against yours and he took a shaky breath, hardly able to believe you were alive and well.

Hunter was waiting for you with open arms and you practically fell into them, letting him wrap you up, tucking your head into his chest as a few more tears escaped you.

“I’m sorry we didn’t find you earlier.” Hunter apologised into your hair and you shook your head, brushing the apology off easily, you couldn’t blame them, you would never think to blame them. Considering the circumstances it was a safe assumption for them to believe you had died at the hands of your battalion, just as it was a safe bet for you to think they had become the Empire’s new soldiers.

You could help but notice that Crosshair was missing from the group, blood going cold when you realised they would never willingly leave one of their own behind, not unless they had no choice in the matter and you guessed that whatever had happened to your battalion had happened to at least one of the batch.

You didn't mention the loss of the sniper, instead when you pulled away from Hunter you gravitated back to Wrecker who was waiting just a step or two behind you, his arm winding around your waist and pulling you even closer.

“What happened to you?” Echo asked and you took a shaky breath, feeling Wrecker’s thumb softly brushing against your hip and you let yourself relax into the touch, a touch you never thought you’d get to feel again.

“How about we go to the Marauder?” You suggested, glancing towards your ship and back to the group. “I don’t think there’s enough space on there for all of us.”

The walk back to the Marauder was silent, the young girl you had noticed but had not been introduced to made her way over to Hunter and took his hand in hers, Hunter smiling down at her before continuing on. You couldn’t help but smile at them as you walked alongside Wrecker, his arm still around you as he kept you close.

Once you were all in the Marauder, everyone in their usual seats with Wrecker pulling you onto his lap, his head on your shoulder and arms still wrapped around your waist, everybody turned to you.

“After the battle on Zaphus the clones turned on me, I didn’t have my lightsaber but,” you paused, hands resting on Wrecker’s forearms as you turned to look at him thankfully, “I managed to escape with your training, guess you were right it did come in handy.”

“Told you it would.” Wrecker said but there was no teasing tone to his voice, no smug I told you so grin on his face, the words were soft and sad in a way you hated hearing from Wrecker.

“I got to the ship and after I heard Obi-Wan’s message to all remaining Jedi I shut my comm off.” Before you could continue Tech cut you off.

“Why would you turn your comm off? We have tried to get in contact with you every day since the end of the Republic.” Tech told you and you felt your heart ache and swell at the same time, all this time you had thought they had wanted you dead when really they had spent every day trying to find you.

“I thought whatever happened to my battalion had happened to you, once I got to Ord Mantell I realised that all the clones had turned, I figured that meant you too.” You told them, feeling your eyes well up but refused to let the tears fall as you leaned further into Wrecker’s chest.

“Y/N, we thought you were dead, stars if we’d known we’d have done everything to find you.” Echo said and you smiled over at him.

Out of all the batch you had known Echo longest. You and General Skywalker had always gotten along well and had aided each other plenty of times throughout the Clone Wars. Echo and Fives had made quick work befriending you and you had become closer with each mission you worked together.  

Echo had always been kind to you, always ready to help in any way he could whether it be through bringing you a hot mug of caf when the sleepless nights piled on top of each other or shooting down clankers before they could get a hit on you.

When the batch had come to assist you and had brought Echo along with them you couldn’t stop the tears that filled your eyes as you took in the pale skin and robotics attached to him but ultimately none of that mattered compared to the fact that Echo was alive and safe with your batch and you hadn’t been able to resist pulling his skinny frame into a tight hug.

“I know, me too.” You murmured, feeling Wrecker’s arms tighten around you before he relaxed again, assuring himself you were here and with him.

That night, long after more talking and a few shared tears, you headed down to the bunk rooms. Climbing into bed with Wrecker again after so long apart made your eyes sting but you refused to cry again tonight.

Wrecker’s arms wrapped around you, encompassing your frame as he dragged you as close to him as you could get, not a single inch of space between you, not that you were complaining, if anything your tried to burrow yourself deeper into his chest, fingers clinging to his blacks as you let yourself relax for the first time in a long time.

After everything that had happened you had truly thought you were alone in the galaxy but having Wrecker here, his body comforting and steady as his fingers traced random shapes on your back, you knew you still had a home.

“Missed you every day, mesh’la.” Wrecker murmured, his lips moving against your hair. “Knew you couldn’t be dead, never gave up on ya, baby.”

“I’m sorry for turning my comm off, I wish I-”

“No,” Wrecker cut you off, pressing a kiss to your head. “S’like Tech said it was smart, we could’a tried to trick ya. Doesn’t matter now anyway, we got you back, I got you back.”

You smiled shakily into Wrecker’s chest and nodded along with his words. He was right, nothing could be changed, no amount of pleading with the Force could undo time, all you had was now and you weren’t going to waste a single moment, not when you never thought you’d have this again.

“I love you Wrecker.” You whispered into his chest, glancing up to see him smiling widely down at you.

“I love ya too, baby.” He told you before placing a kiss to your forehead, pulling you into him.

You let your eyes fall closed as you took steady breaths, feeling like you could breathe properly again with Wrecker’s heartbeat against your ear.

It wasn’t long before you drifted off, Wrecker’s arms a heavy and grounding assurance that this was real, that not everything had been snatched from you in the blink of an eye, that the Force wasn’t cruel enough to leave you alone in the galaxy. Every night since that day you had yearned for Wrecker and now you got to fall asleep in his arms again, content and safe for the first time in what felt like forever.

Wrecker Taglist (New character, click the link in my bio to add yourself!)

Thank you for reading!💙