An Actress Life - Chapter 13

An Actress Life - Chapter 13

Chapter 13

warnings: rape, language 

word count: 2,016 words

"We should undress you." He tells her softly. "Are you okay with that?" He asks her softly and she nods. "O-Okay." She says and Jensen starts taking her shoes off. When he wants to takes her dress off she backs away and he nods in understanding. He takes his button up off and his t-shirt too before giving his shirt to her. She takes it with a shy smiles before taking it on, after pulling her dress down her legs. She lies down on the bed as Jensen takes his slacks off and lies down next to her. 

He pulls her into his arms and she snuggles into his chest. Jensen rubs her arm gently, "You're safe." He whispers softly and kisses her forehead. 

"Thank you." She whispers, before they doze off to sleep. 

The next morning when Jensen wakes up, Y/N is still asleep as he climbs out of bed and takes his slacks on, before leaving the room to call Gen. He tells Gen everything that has happened the day before. He feels so helpless and clueless about what happened. He doesn't know, how to help or make her feel better, but Gen tells him, all Y/N needs is him to be there for her. Jensen thanks her and walks back inside the room he shares with Y/N. 

He smiles at the sleeping form of her, at least in her sleep she looks peacefully. When closes the door of the room, Y/N slowly stirs awake and Jensen smiles lovingly at her as he sits down on the bed next to her.  "Good morning." He whispers softly and kisses her head as she snuggles into his side. He rubs her arms gently smiling at her, but frowns as he notices the dark bruises her wrist carries. "Are you okay?" He asks her softly as he looks at her wrist and she quickly covers it with the blanket. She nods and Jensen can look right through her lie, but doesn't say anything. 

She gives him a small smile and disappears into the bathroom. She looks at herself in the mirror, gripping the sink tightly as she feels herself tear up. She feels disgusted by just looking at herself. She's so thankful, that she's found a moment, where she could free herself from him. She's never seen Jensen hit someone and he's only done that because of her. She washes her face and dries it with the towel, before taking her dress on she's taken with her inside the bathroom.

Y/N walks out of the bathroom and returns Jensen's T-Shirt, she's been wearing the night before. Jensen gives her a smile and she returns it slightly.

She walks back into the bathroom and closes the door. She lean against the door  and takes a deep breath. You got this. You're safe with Jensen. 

Jensen knocks on the door, "You okay. Y/N/N?" He asks you softly. "Yeah." She tells him, lying to him and herself. She walks out of the bathroom a moment later. Jensen is still in front of the bathroom and places his hands on her shoulder. "Talk to me baby." He says softly and she starts sobbing as he pulls her into his arms. He hushes her softly and hugs her close, rubbing her back gently. 

He cups her cheek gently and when he looks at her, she looks away. "None of what happened yesterday is your fault, you hear me?" He says softly. She nods as she still sobs. When she looks up at him, he notices how broken she looks. The shine he loves to see in a her eyes seems gone. 

Few hours later...

Y/N and Jensen have been home for quite some time. During the drive home, they haven't talked a lot nor did they when they've got home. Y/N has disappeared into bathroom for about an hour to shower, trying to wash off Matt's dirty hands and touches. Jensen's felt devastated, because he hates seeing the woman he loves so hurt and broken. He thinks for now, he should give her some space, because she doesn't want to talk and he has to accept that. 

She's curled up on the couch in the living room, watching Jane the Virgin, trying to distract herself from the events from yesterday. 

The doorbell rings and she gets off the couch to answer the door. "I'll get the door." She yells. "Fine." Jensen yells from his office. She opens the door, surprised to see Gen. "Hey, what are you doing here?" She asks in confusion and Gen just walks past her. "We'll see us in a few hours." Y/N tells Gen. 

"I know, but I wanted to talk to you." 

The two of them walk into the living room and sit on the couch."About what do you wanna talk?" She asks her curiously. 

"I know what happened last night." She tells you with a small sigh and smile, pulling you into a tight hug.. "I'm so sorry." Gen whispers. Seems like Jensen told her. Great. "It's okay." She lies. Gen sighs softly as she pulls away from Y/N. "Y/N, don't lie to me, I can see through your mask." Gen tells her softly and Y/N looks away from her, chewing on her lip. 

"I'm gonna kick his ass, I mean Jared will." She says playfully, laughing slightly and trying to cheer you up. "I'm just thankful, that I freed myself and that Jensen was there." She says as she feels herself teat up again and Gen hugs her close. When she is around Y/N just feels comfortable, she can be herself around Gen and just let her feeling and emotions free. Y/N tells Gen, how she went to the restroom and Matt followed her. 

"What a son of a bitch," she says angrily and shocked. "How can a man do something like this to a woman you've been with, I cannot understand that." She says as Jensen enters the living room. "Hey Gen, thanks for coming." They hug. "I'm gonna leave you two alone." Jensen says. "No, stay." Y/N tells Jensen and he nods with a small smile, sitting down next to her. 

"Y/n/n, you have to talk about what has happened. I know it hurts, but you have to." Gen starts and she looks at Jensen. "I'm- we are always there for you." He says and Y/N nods. She tells them everything what has happened in details, when she finishes, she sobs so hard. Jensen looks hurt, angrily and sorry for her at the same time.

"This fucking son of a bitch, how could he wait for a moment like this? Just to get you to sleep with him?! I can't believe that!" Jensen exclaim in anger.  "Jensen chill out." Gen says softly, while Y/N is still crying. She feels so much better, after telling them what exactly happened. "Thank you guys." She sniffles with puffy red eyes. "For what?" Gen asks confused. 

"For everything, for always being there when I need you, for being by my side and having my back all the time." Gen kisses Y/N's cheek. "You're my best friend and I-I love you. Of course I am always there for you and have your back. Like you always got mine." She says hugging her. She stands up a moment later and smiled at them. 

"But now I gotta go and prepare everything for the BBQ." She says goodbye to Y/N and Jensen and leaves. Y/N sits down on the couch and continues watching 'Jane the Virgin'. Jensen sits down next to her. She looks at him with a small smile. He puts his arm around her and she snuggles into his chest. He kisses her head gently. 

"We don't have to go to this BBQ, Jared and Gen would understand." Jensen tells her softly and she knows, he means well. "I know, but I need to be around the people I love." She tells him and he smiles. She really needs the distraction from that what has happened last night. She doesn't want to think about what happened too much. 

"You are around me." He says playfully with a smile, she rolls her eyes playfully, smiling slightly and playfully hit his chest. "Jensen you know how I meant that." "I just wanted to see you smile." He says softly. 

"I love you, you know that?" She says with a smile. 

"I know." He says softly and kisses her. He deepens the kiss and kisses her more passionately until she pulls away, because she knows where it ends. 

"Jay, I-I can't do this." She says and gets up. "Did I do something wrong?" He asks in concern and gets up as well to pull you in a hug, but she backs off.

"No, it's just- I just feel so disgusting and dirty. I'm sorry." "I am sorry, you have no reason to apologize. I guess, I rushed a bit." He is about to leave her, but she stops him. "Jensen, it's not your fault. I-I'm so sorry that I am so different towards you, you don't deserve this. But he broke something inside me and I don't know what. When I think about Sex it was always something enjoyable but now? It's something I'm afraid of because of him. I'm so sorry. 

I love you, but I don't feel ready." She says and walks into the kitchen. 

He follows her and reaches for her wrist gently. "I know, we just had sex yesterday." 

Wait, did he really just said that? 

"Are you fucking kidding me?! Is this all about sex?!" She almost yells at him.

"You're just thinking about sex right now?! Seriously?!" She adds. "No no no, I-I didn't mean it like that, I-I meant-" He stutters.

"How did you mean it then? That you're just thinking of sex?! Getting your dick wet, that's what's important now?!" She yells at him, feeling every kind of emotion right now, but disappointed is probably the strongest emotion she's feeling.

"No! I didn't even have a chance to to speak out!" Now he starts raising his voice. 

"Then speak out!" She yells at him. 

"What I meant, was that many things have changed in than less 20 hours. And it breaks my heart to see you this way. And I'm so sorry I rushed it, I-I'm...I-I'm really sorry." 

This incident definitely changed something between her and Jensen, although she knows he would never force her to do anything against her will. She doesn't know, if she'd enjoy sleeping with him. It feels so much different, just thinking about it. She sighs, still feeling angry with him, even though she knows how he meant it. 

Everything seemed perfect, then that shit happened to them. She also knows, what came out of his mouth was meant different, than it has sounded. When she looks up at Jensen, she sees the guilt and pain he's feeling right now and she also feels sorry about going off at him like that. 

"I know, you're really sorry and I know you didn't mean that. Yesterday, everything seemed so perfect with you. But today nearly everything is changed, I know he didn't rape me, but that he tried. I'm so thankful that you were there, but now when I think about sleeping with you it feels different." She tells him, barely looking at him. 

Jensen walks over to her and pulls her into a hug. "I hope you know, that i didn't mean it like that. All of that, just because of him. I would never force you to have sex with me, when you don't want that, never. It hurt's to see you like that, because you're the person who love to be happy and have fun, but that person seems lost somewhere inside you." He tells her quietly. She hugs him close as they both tear up, holding onto each other.

Read next part here! :)

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Life for Rent - Masterlist

​Pairing: Mobster!Dean Winchester x Escort!Reader

Universe: AU

Summary: Y/N can be anyone for a price. Her life is ruled by contracts, men and money. It’s all she knows; countless identities, seedy clients, and strict regulations. She has to obey the rules, but her past is full of secrets and her future is resting in the wrong hands. But will her next client be the same as the rest?

Rating: 18+

Warnings: No minors to read this please. Each chapter will heed it’s own individual warnings but I will mention now that it will be a slow burn fic and there will be smut, angst, gritty subjects, violence and more smut. So please be 18 + to read this…

Video trailer created by the wonderful @downanddirtydean​ <3

This series is complete!

Total Word Count:  161,417.

Main Masterlist

—————————————————–

Preview

Prologue

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five  

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven    

Chapter Eight  

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten  

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen  

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty One  

Chapter Twenty Two

Chapter Twenty Three

Chapter Twenty Four

Chapter Twenty Five

Chapter Twenty Six  

Chapter Twenty Seven

Chapter Twenty Eight

Chapter Twenty Nine

Chapter Thirty

Epilogue

Letting Go

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Summary: Nobody prepares you for losing the love of your life.

Warnings: mention of blood and death

I finally completed season 15 after nearly two years of putting it off. I cried my eyes out those last couple episodes for sure. Also, let me know if you'd like to be tagged in my future Supernatural fics!

MASTERLIST

---

“Promise me something darlin’, promise me that you’re going to find someone else. I don’t want you to be missing me too much when I’m gone and I know that you wouldn’t consider it but, fall in love with someone else, someone who isn’t going to screw things up the way that I did many times. I love you Y/N, forever and always.”

Fresh tears streamed down the woman’s face, her body shaking from the sobs that wrecked her from deep within. In such a short time she’s lost so many people that she grew to love and consider family; Castiel, Jack and her boyfriend, Dean being the top three that really meant the world to her.

It’s been a little over a week since Dean died and for the first two nights she couldn’t bare to sleep in the room they shared but on the third day, Y/N had found herself pulling on his burgundy shirt, inhaling his musky scent that lingered on the fabric as she laid on his side of the bed. Most days Y/N spent all her time curled up into a tight ball in bed, crying her eyes out into his pillow as she desperately clung to it.

Dean’s death affected his baby brother and lady so much so that it was physically challenging for either of them to get anything done around the bunker. The only reason either of them surfaced for the day is to take the dog out to do his business and on a short walk.

“Now that we have the freedom to do whatever we want, why don’t we start our own family? It’d be nice to have one or two tiny Winchesters running through these halls.”

Y/N buried her puffy face deeper into the soaked pillow as she kept replaying some of the moments spent with her lover. Dean had mentioned that he wanted everything with Chuck to be done with before they could finally settle down without having to wonder what games Chuck is up to. Unfortunately, they both didn't make it that far together as Dean's life was cut short.

Sam gently pushed the door open to check on her as she hadn't gotten out of bed for the day. It's Saturday and on Saturdays she would spend her time baking all kinds of pies for Dean to taste.

The bed dipped beneath Sam and the dog's weight, the grieving pair didn't say anything right away. Sam's eyes landed on the pile of Dean's dirty clothes in the corner of the room that Y/N has yet to move, causing his eyes to tear up more.

"Sammy?" Y/N finally lifted her puffy face from the pillow to look at the lone Winchester brother who shared the same miserable, exhausted look.

"Hey, I um…I came to see how you were doing, also wanted to know if you were up to getting some fresh air with me."

"I'm not up for it Sam, just let me be."

"Come on Y/N, you've been cooped up here for two days. You need some fresh air." He gently squeezed her ankle and she sighed. He was right, she needed to get out of the room that held so many memories of her and Dean.

"Okay."

She hauled herself out of bed once Sam left the room and pulled on a pair of leggings and one of Dean's old flannels that she loved seeing him in. She loosely tied her hair into a bun and slipped on her sneakers to join Sam on his nature walk.

"Let's go buddy." The fluffy dog didn't need to be told twice as he happily walked beside her.

Sam and Y/N both claimed the steps and headed out the door; the bright sunlight almost blinding her from its intensity. There's a lake about two miles away which she loved to go to when she needed to clear her head, that's something she really needed to do right now.

"Sam I have a question." The tall giant looked down at her, waiting for her to continue as they trudged closer to their destination.

"Are you going to keep working cases? You know, carry on the hunting tradition."

"Honestly, I don't know. It definitely isn't going to be the same anymore and I don't think I'll be able to do that without.." His voice trailed off, his mind flooding with memories of him and Dean.

"Okay."

"What about you, what are you going to do? Dean set you free before he left."

"Love is nowhere in the cards for me again Sammy." The pretty lake came into view and the pair quickened their pace a bit to sit on the fallen tree trunk.

"Dean was it for me ya know, I mean he was far from perfect but he was to me, flaws included."

"But he said-"

"I know what he said but I don't think I'll be able to move on, not anytime soon anyways. What about you, you lost Eileen all over again." Sam tossed a stone into the water fighting back his tears yet again. He missed his girlfriend so much.

"I'm sure someone will come along soon enough. I'll miss her everyday but I can’t keep living in the past." The pair fell silent, focusing on the sounds of the birds chirping in the trees that surrounded them.

"I miss him so much Sammy."

"Same here Y/N."

Y/N rested her head on his shoulder and he leaned his on top of her head.

"I miss Cas and Jack too."

"Me too."

—

Ten years later

"Behind you!" Sam warned Y/N of the demon charging at her a second too late as he drove the angel blade into her back.

She collapsed to the floor, blood pouring out of her wound. Sam killed the demon before moving to her side.

"No no no no no, stay with me alright." Sam fished his phone out of his pocket to dial 911.

"Sammy, no."

"I can't lose you too Y/N, I can’t."

"You're going to be alright Sam, tell little Dean that auntie loves him for me please." Blood stained her mouth as she slowly faded.

"Y/N…please."

"I guess my time is up, never thought I'd be taken out by one of those suckers though. You'll be fine Sam, it's time to let me go. I love you Sammy."

"I love you too." Sam broke down into tears, watching the light fade from her eyes until she took her final breath. She was the sister that he never knew he needed and now he has to add her to the list of dead family members.

Now all he's left with in this world is his son. The only good thing about this is the fact that he didn't have to break the news to anyone since she never did move on from Dean, she had flings but nothing serious.

Y/N stood in the middle of an open road surrounded by tall trees, no incoming traffic, no loud noises only peace and quiet. Looking down at her outfit she was surprised to see that she was wearing the floral mid-thigh dress that Dean had bought her. She ran her hands down the chiffon material with a bright smile on her face.

The familiar rumble of the impala drew her attention up ahead as it came to a stop in front of her. Dean got out of Baby with his charming smile on his face, she missed that smile so much.

"Hey sweetheart."

"Dean."

Y/N took off running towards him, jumping into his open arms. Dean effortlessly caught his girl and buried his face in the crook of her neck. He didn’t know how long it's been since he died as time doesn't exist in heaven but by the way she's squeezing him tight he could tell it's been far too long.

"I missed you so much." Y/N pulled back to cup his face in her hands, his green eyes stared up at her.

"I know sweetheart, I missed you too."

These are some of my favorites😊

Damn. I'll take gifs I stared at for far too long for 800 Alex.