Peter: You Know, I Wake Up In The Morning And Im Disappointed. I Dont Choke On My Food At Lunch, Im Disappointed.

Peter: You know, I wake up in the morning and I’m disappointed. I don’t choke on my food at lunch, I’m disappointed. I make it to dinner, I’m disappointed.

Tony, calling the therapist again: Hi, I’d like to schedule another appointment.

Peter: What if I were to hit my head really hard with a fire extinguisher and have all my braincells click into place?

Ned, grabbing fire extinguisher: We won’t know until we try!

After Tom Holland spoils...

Bucky trying to make plans with Sam:

If it comes down to self sacrifice:

Tony: I’ll do it.

Steve: No Tony, I will.

An hour later...

Tony: No, I’M GONNA DIE FOR YOU ALL!

Steve: NO THIS HAS BEEN MY SPECIALITY SINCE THE 30’S

Tony: BITCH I JUST WANNA DIE BUT APPARENTLY THATS ToO mUcH tO aSk FoR—

What Tony comes home to find:

Tony: Hey kid. How was your time with Shuri—why is there a giant pool of rice in the middle of the room?

Peter: Oh, h-hey Mr. Stark. So um, I kinda accidentally spilled water on Mr. Vision and he kinda started sputtering and collapsed, so Shuri suggested that we throw rice over him, so um...

Tony: ??????!!!!!!

Peter, verge of panic: i GoT mY hAnDs StUcK iN pRiNgLe CoNtAiNeRs OnCe WhAt Do YoU eXpEcT fRoM mE???