I Found So Interesting That Even Though CDD Community It's Meant To Help And Support In CDD Systems And

I found so interesting that even though CDD community it's meant to help and support in CDD systems and all that kind of shit you can see there a lot of fucking fight between themselves, I'm not even calling the endos in this

Idk, it's interesting...

When brain's so silly that because you're in a horrible moment when you're scared for your life and you saw Spiderverse movie in the middle of that crisis moment you end up splitting a spiderverse subsystem to deal with that trauma and situation

hui!! were relearning spanish bc its our first language certain alters formed.when we onky spoke it only spesk spansih and i thought you'd find it neat

So you mean some of your alters only speak spanish and now all the sys is re-learning it?? Cool

That's a similar case to us tbh, we have various alters that only speak spanish because it's our first language, but we can speak more english lol

What a good surprise not being the only one like this!!

When will people understand that boundaries ≠ stance? I think this a big issue in the plural community that many people can't understand, specially in the endo syscourse topic

Boundary & stance

When we talk about a boundaries we talk about limits for our own comfort, boundaries are an important thing about someone's life because it helps you to prioritize yourself to have healty and good relationships with other people

Boundaries are something everyone has, it something natural because of our consciousness and feelings. Some poeple are able to identify them and put them into formal words, some people let other people break their boundaries without even realizing, but everyone has boundaries, at least one

When we talk about a stance we talk about your posture and the way you stand to a topic, stances are based in your opinion and comprehension about a topic and aren't related to other things

Stances are your opinion, your POV about a topic, how you understand and think about something, you can have a stance for everything including topics that for others doesn't have sence to have a stance, after all stances are subjective and something you completly choose, having stances isn't something that everybody has, but the majority of people do have, and it's also valid to have a stance and don't wanting to share it

Sure, some people base their stances in their comfort, opinion and feelings, but other people don't, at the end a stance isn't necessarily influenced about your feelings

So we need to understand that even though stances and boundaries can co-related they're not hand in hand always, we're millions of people and everyone is it's own world, so obviously might be exceptions about someone who has a boundary who doesn't align with their stance, after all they're not the same thing and aren't forcefully related

Endo syscourse and the boundaries problem

I don't talk about a topic if it's not directly related to the main topic of the blog, but I needed to clarify this before explaining the problem syscourse has with this two things

So we all know the three basic stances: - Anti (Against) - Neutral (Self explanatory) - Pro (In favor)

But did you know those aren't the only stances that exist in the world? At least in syscourse I'm the only one that I have seen that got out of the three basic stances to have a different one, oct, and it's a more complex stance, but that's not the topic of this post (Though it's important for a future point)

There are some systems who don't share their stances but set a boundarie and random people (Mostly endos and pro-endos) come and assume their stance based on their boundarie

"I'm ok with endos/pro-endos interacting" People assume they're pro-endo

"I'm uncomfotable with endos/pro-endos interacting" People assume they're anti-endo

"I'm uncomfortable with anti-endos interacting" People assume they're pro-endo

And you know that's a shitty behavior? Didn't someone told you that assuming things about people you don't know it's rude? Didn't someone told you that judging a book by it's cover it's bad? Because that's what people like this are doing

If someone doesn't publicly says their stance you don't know it

I'm not anti-endo and yet still I'm uncofrtable with endos/pro-endos interacting, I know people who are anti-endo but don't like anti-endos interacting, and like this I can go on a long day

People stablishing their boundaries isn't synonym of they saying their stance, and if you assume someone's stance based on a boundary you're part of the problem Yes, I'm aware some boundaries align with some stances, but you can't know if that' the case without the person telling you about that

And then comes the people who feel they're morally superior or shit like that because they break someone's boundaries just to start attacking them or a stances fight (I have seen this in both endos and CDD) and that's a horrible shitty behavior

If you break someone else's boundaries (talking about endo/pro-endo/anti-endo interacting boundaries) you can't get mad if they or someone else breaks yours, you did it first you have to appeal the consequences

The system community is a shitty toxic place thanks to problems like this, if endos and CDD systems don't have basic respect to one another we can't evolve as a better community

Both sides are haters, like to fight and then get mad when people fight back (not everyone, but a lot of people do)

I see this attitude more with endos/pro-endos and that's worst, the same endos/pro-endos that get mad because someone broke their boundary, fight back or just don't feel comfortable with them interacting are the same ones who do shit to that people

If endos/pro-endos come and attack CDD systems just for having a boundary they're just spreading hate and shit, and that system might become an anti-endo just because they harras them, don't you see this kind of people just make their own problem?

None of the two sides is safe, they both complain about the other side bitting but they also bite

Be mature, respect boundaries, don't assume others stances and stop harassing/attacking people with different stances/boundaries

Remember, if you perpetuate one of this behaviors you're not helping anything, your just making this worst and help the problem grow out

Term stealing/reclaiming

So this post it's to talk about the theft and "reclaim" that the plural community is facing, because it gets to a lot of problems in various ways, principally in the "Endos get out of our community" and "Anti-endos get out of our community" fight

I'm not gonna be taking sides and I'm gonna talk about this issue with both communities at the same manner because both of them (Endo and CDD) do wrong with this

What's the problem?

Well it's pretty easy to understand what it's the meaning of the words, isn't it? But let's do a better understanding on what it means in the plural community as a whole

When someone steals a term to use them from the other side they normally do it breaking their own boundaries, why would you think is good for you to break your own limits? And also if you don't like that side, why even bothering in stealing from them? Isn't that the same term but just like "now it's mine so it doesn't hurt me" because you basically steal it? Isn't just better to make your own term with the same definition or even a better/more personal definition that fits you best?

I honestly don't get what the point of stealing the other sides terms is

And then are the people who steal them to reclaim them to "the other side"... It's just shoving fucking syscourse through a term that doesn't care about that, terms that aren't aligned with syscourse should not be put within syscourse things

You really know that it's still stole and that doesn't make you a better person right?... You know that's not how reclaim works within this specific context?...

When someone or some group reclaims a term/word is by any of this two stances:

A word/term that was use pejorative but has been brought back into acceptable usage, usually starting within its original target

A word/term that was taken away and stolen from a person/group/community

And, when you see that 98% of this reclaiming game it's about... You'll see that doesn't fit in the two definitions... Cause they're not "reclaiming" they're stealing and saying it's ok

Since when we agree as a community that stealing each other, putting fucking discourse things that doesn't have anything to do with the term/word and claiming "I fixed it" "I reclaimed it now it's ours" was a good thing?

If you want to be better and don't contribute to the fucking problem and fight don't do this kind of shit, your not helping anyone, you're not doing a better job nor something like that, you're just making the problem bigger and making us be far away from a posible solution

Y'all need to be more mature and understand that more than a half of this stealing and reclaiming you do it's unnecessary and makes a bigger problem, doesn't solve anything just makes a bigger and worst problem, you're putting oil to and already extended fire in hope to put out the fire, and that's not how you put out a fucking fire

Anti-Endo part

So when anti-endos reclaim a term it's usually a label and/or a role, almost every time you see a CDD system anti-endo reclaiming or stealing an endo term it's a label or a role

I'm aware that it's not the only things that can and are being reclaimed and stole, but most like 98% of the reclaimed and stolen things are just that, labels and roles

There are many anti-endo that are "Why don't endos make their own terms" but then fucking steals/reclaim their terms, isn't that hypocrite? Because from what I see it is. How do you expect endos to separate form CDD systems terminology when you're stealing their terminology, idk, I just don't get this kind of people

If that term fits you just fucking use it unless it specifies that it's exclusive for one type of experience, and here's the thing...

Experience exclusiveness does NOT equal syscourse

People really need to understand that, it's similar to the boundary and stance fight (Which I already talked about, I'm linking the post if you wanna go read it) it's stupid that you put an stance on top of something that doesn't have anything to do with it, if you want to be exclusive in that term, go ahead, but putting an stance to that it's nonsence

Being and exclusive experience term has nothing to do with stances and this syscourse fight. If you, CDD anti endo, want to do a term/role/label just for CDD systems go ahead, but please put something like "exclusive to systems with a dissociative identity disorder" instead of "this is anti-endo/anti-endo exclusive"

I'm not gonna go to deep in this cause that's another post topic, but yeah-

And if you're gonna steal/"reclaim" endo terms just to make them anti endo, you're horrible, you're part of the problem, specifically this problem, and you're not doing something good or that helps, you're just putting more fuel to the already big fire

Like, maybe I will kinda understand if a label endo-exclusive it's, indeed, a CDD exclusive experience, but that doesn't make it seem good either in my eyes

And if an (pro)endo makes a term that's not exclusive and can be used for everyone, why will you steal/reclaim that?? It's dumb and nonsense, are you really that mad about the origin of the word that you have to do that shit?

Maybe if the creator it's problematic for bad things outside the "It's endo/pro-endo" I would kinda understand it, but it's pretty dumb to go and reclaim/steal terms just because of their creator when the creator didn't do anything wrong and just to fit your stance, that's a shitty behavior if you ask me

So anti-endo CDD systems, stop "reclaiming" and stealing terms that aren't yours and you can't reclaim, you're not helping anyone and are not contributing to solve the problem

Endo part

The things I said for the anti-endos kinda apply the same here, both parts are make almost the same mistakes in this story

The reclaiming/stealing because an stances is bullshit, and when it comes to experiences and it's exclusiveness it's worst

I think endos sin more from this error than CDD systems, they see some terms that are exclusive for dissociative identity disorders experiences and come and steal them

And yet this same endos that steal/reclaim exclusive experiences terms are the ones who complain that they're not faking the disorder nor wanna be compared to the CDD systems, you see how hypocrite that is? (Generalizing, not all are like this but a big majority are)

A lot of anti-endos and CDD systems dislikes the endos and pro endos because they behavior, how they steal, take, "reclaim" and do that kind of things to dissociative identity experiences of the disorder, it's not that hard to make up your own terms and don't steal and take advantage of the terms that are medical and non-medical but exclusive

As I said with anti-endos, you can make up new word to make your own term that it's for you. I know there are some immature anti-endos that will try to reclaim/steal the term, but the mature CDD systems and anti-endos we'll be glad that your not appropriating our things, that you're making up your terms to be separate from us

The other things that I didn't say is because I don't want to repeat the same points as I already did

Both parts

And yet addressing their issues by separate doesn't mean we already talked about all, because here comes the bigger issue that it's involving this to parts and their immaturity

We come to the both sides terms, terms, labels and words that aren't exclusive in experience, and for good and obvious reason don't have a fucking stance shove it down. Terms like plural or headmate

Look, I know you can say there are sources from both sides to reclaim it as exclusive, this and another words, but in reality there's this thing called "impartiality", some word/terms are that, impartial and neutral, that aren't attached to any side

I get that can get annoying or something like that if you see the side that you don't like, but that doesn't give you the right to come and try to "reclaim"/steal that word and put them a fucking stance, because those terms aren't exclusive experience at all, so what you're doing it's trying to make a word a weapon and put it a stance, like if the word had consciousness to have an stance in this stupid fight, the word doesn't give a damn how it's used and you, both sides, are making a big deal about it

People have to accept that some word are for both parts, like it or not, and you can't do anything about it, sure is valid to feel mad, sad or something like that, but going to the point of trying to steal or reclaim a word that isn't yours and isn't exclusive it's a pretty dumb shit that just helps the image that both CDD and endos are some toxic little inmatures

Words/terms like those can describe a various amount of things, so it's obvious that both sides are gonna use it, if you don't like that well stop using those words and use the exclusive ones, there's no exclusive word for what you're searching for? Well go ahead and make up your own words to use it for yourself, but stop putting yourself in this stupid words/terms fight cause it's hurting both sides and benefiting no one

Can we please be mature enough and grow up and leave this fights? Don't you think endos and CDD systems would be in peace and not have this stupid fights if things like this wouldn't be a problem?

Endos and CDD antis are the ones who are obstaculising themselves to be separate, it's like a fight between toddlers when they have their own toys but are mad because are not the same colour so they fight for the other's toy, they can't be separate from each other because they're fighting for no reason, for a thing that could be just not happening, do you imagine how would it be if the kids saw that they can have shared toys and personal toys without a fight? That would be ideal and good, the same with this thing

To be honest it's just frustrating seeing both parts being their own enemies and blaming the other for that, when they're the one to blame, both of them, it's both fault, and you can't say me otherwise

In this topic I think I covered all the things to be said, be free to comment/repost your own thoughts or additions to this post and topic, if they're for a little chat/debate and it's respectful I will give it a try to make a little conversation from that

But for now, that's all, see ya and have a good day/night

"My kid is ok, they don't have trauma"

Bitch your kid learned english alone when he was less than 10 years because you didn't know the language and so the kid felt more secure talking about things in english because it gave them the sense of control and privacy

Bitch your kid learn to dissociate in english because that's more safe and now sometimes they can't remember their own native language because their brain lock itself in english

Bitch your kid likes more english and talks better in english than their native language because they feel more confident and safe like that

Random like vent post that applies to us lol