Host Be Like

Host be like

"We don't have any sexual trauma, wdym??"

And the 4 sexual protectores, 2 trauma holder and 2 sexual alters just look at him with an "are you serious??" face

OCT Endo

I'm gonna present and explain what does OCT endo means, as we use it in tags to describe our instance to endos

OCT means "Oppositively Constructive To" as a different position to the endo opinion besides pro/neu/anti because none of those described correctly our position to the topic

By definition, being oppositively constructive means opposing an idea, proposal, or plan while offering constructive feedback, alternatives, or improvements. This stance involves a critical approach that seeks to improve or refine the original concept rather than simply rejecting it, aiming for a better, more effective solution

So this means we're anti endo? Not exactly, so we're gonna explain in detail and depth what we mean when we use oct endo as our position label

To make short the big story we're gonna skip a lot of background that made us be in this position, it's going to be the meaning, if you're interested on knowing the background for all of this and a more extended view of what we think about endos you can comment and will do a post if we see it necessary

We like the theory, but not how it's practice; we like the concept, not the endos/endo community itself

The concept of non disordered plurality is so extend and interesting in many ways, yes, we don't agree with many points, but we do agree, understand and feel ok with some others, like all of the things that exist we think it can be improved and refined, although some specific types of non disordered plurality are already well explained and established, but I'm talking of endos as a whole an not like and specific category of non disordered plurality

The concept of non disordered plurality is real, valid and we're half ok with it, we do find some ways of presenting it and some characteristics in this a bit off and offensive to disordered plurality, but we're ok with the concept itself

THE PROBLEM comes when talking about the endos themselves and the community that they have made it's when we enter the worst part of the things

All of the endos that we have met are horrible persons, actively tried to manipulate, use and abuse us, or are just immature annoying people that like harassing and feel moral superiority that end up being trash, we had have terrible experiences with endos, and we have seen the attitude and behavior of endos outside our experiences and almost always is just horrible shit (Bonus points because a lot of pro-endos are similar that this endos)

And even outside their horrible behavior and attitude, endos have ruined themselves, in the meaning that they ruined the concept of non disordered plurality, many of the endos that we have seen don't even understand it and it so... Strange and uncomfortable, I assure you many of disordered systems would not have any problems with non disordered plurality if it wasn't for this kind of behavior and misinformation/lack of knowledge in their own topics, it's so dumb for me to see how they claim to be something they don't even understand and try to make that their whole personality and shit like that, because it affects negatively in their lives and in others lives in the way they're doing it

We don't say all endos are like this because it's not, but you have to admit the the majority of endos are like that and it's... Horrible. For making up numbers we'll say that like 98% of endos are the worst of worst, and like only 2% it's the ones that are good or neutral, we needed to search through a lot to find some good endos and all the endos that have been interacting with us previously and the attacks we received here proves our point that the majority of endos are terrible persons, or at least are horrible

We're not going to say and specify our problems with endos and their community because that would be such a long post and I don't think somebody would even care to read it, but we indeed have a lot of things to say regarding endos and their community

If you think about it none of the to bands are right (endos and none endos - pro vs antis), endos didn't ruin the plural community nor the CDD systems, it was both bands that ruined the community, and instead of, you know, trying to help each other, understand and help the community, both parts are still fighting and are so attached to their beliefs and are so haters that they don't even care for the plural community and we get so fucking annoyed by that

Non disordered plurality is real, is valid, it exists, is the endos that make it horrible, they don't know how to express it and be mature enough to understand it, they've deformed it and now it's something shitty and it's presented in such horrible and dumb ways that it lose it's original concept (Generalizing and our personal opinion), I think the endo community and endos themselves can be better if they improve and understand, admit and work in their flaws, get better terms for them, stop the stupid fight and if they listen to people who aren't just haters, they can be so benefited by some good constructive feedback to improve and be better

So to conclude and made a little summary of this position:

Oct endo it's a stance in where someone it's against endos and they're community because of themselves, not the concept. Someone who's oct endo recognize the existence and validity of the non disordered plurality while having in mind some feedbacks, alternatives and improvements for a better understanding and expressing of this type of plurality in a non hurting nor malicious way, but at the same time is against actual endos for its way of presenting to the world, being critical with their existence in a constructive way and not just denying their existence and validation

People who are oct endo also have their personal preference regarding endo interacting (and some times pro-endo interacting to), some oct endo would prefer not to interact, interact with a specific group of endos or be ok with endo interaction, this stance isn't attached to a specific interaction boundarie

At the same an oct endo could have their own personal opinion and POV of endos, their community, and the concept of non disordered plurality, there isn't a specific rule on their POV nor opinion to use the label oct endo in themselves, just to follow the basics of the stance that has been described

And this is the end of the definition that we give to this stance

I hope we clarified this point and make our stance understandable, if you have any comment or question regarding this you can do it freely just be respectful, cause if you're not we're gonna delete it

We just explain the stance, not our complete POV and opinion on endos, so please have that in mind and don't deform things to claim we're one of the 3 basic stances or to attack us, make assumptions and claim your assumptions are real

Also anyone can use this stance, after all stances are for everyone to use, and take our example as a invitation to make your own stance if the actual ones (pro/neu/anti) doesn't describe you, just like us

Have a good day or night, and I hope this post doesn't end in problems, see ya

Sometimes I want to make a discord server for systems to being an actual good server but the I remember that people are shitty most of the time so it would end in shit cause people will just enter to make caos and drama

It really depends, talking about frequent fronters and the ones we know best we have a list of likes we commonly share or we're ok with it, after all we need to mask a consistent persona to blend with people

But we do have different likes!!

When will people understand that boundaries ≠ stance? I think this a big issue in the plural community that many people can't understand, specially in the endo syscourse topic

Boundary & stance

When we talk about a boundaries we talk about limits for our own comfort, boundaries are an important thing about someone's life because it helps you to prioritize yourself to have healty and good relationships with other people

Boundaries are something everyone has, it something natural because of our consciousness and feelings. Some poeple are able to identify them and put them into formal words, some people let other people break their boundaries without even realizing, but everyone has boundaries, at least one

When we talk about a stance we talk about your posture and the way you stand to a topic, stances are based in your opinion and comprehension about a topic and aren't related to other things

Stances are your opinion, your POV about a topic, how you understand and think about something, you can have a stance for everything including topics that for others doesn't have sence to have a stance, after all stances are subjective and something you completly choose, having stances isn't something that everybody has, but the majority of people do have, and it's also valid to have a stance and don't wanting to share it

Sure, some people base their stances in their comfort, opinion and feelings, but other people don't, at the end a stance isn't necessarily influenced about your feelings

So we need to understand that even though stances and boundaries can co-related they're not hand in hand always, we're millions of people and everyone is it's own world, so obviously might be exceptions about someone who has a boundary who doesn't align with their stance, after all they're not the same thing and aren't forcefully related

Endo syscourse and the boundaries problem

I don't talk about a topic if it's not directly related to the main topic of the blog, but I needed to clarify this before explaining the problem syscourse has with this two things

So we all know the three basic stances: - Anti (Against) - Neutral (Self explanatory) - Pro (In favor)

But did you know those aren't the only stances that exist in the world? At least in syscourse I'm the only one that I have seen that got out of the three basic stances to have a different one, oct, and it's a more complex stance, but that's not the topic of this post (Though it's important for a future point)

There are some systems who don't share their stances but set a boundarie and random people (Mostly endos and pro-endos) come and assume their stance based on their boundarie

"I'm ok with endos/pro-endos interacting" People assume they're pro-endo

"I'm uncomfotable with endos/pro-endos interacting" People assume they're anti-endo

"I'm uncomfortable with anti-endos interacting" People assume they're pro-endo

And you know that's a shitty behavior? Didn't someone told you that assuming things about people you don't know it's rude? Didn't someone told you that judging a book by it's cover it's bad? Because that's what people like this are doing

If someone doesn't publicly says their stance you don't know it

I'm not anti-endo and yet still I'm uncofrtable with endos/pro-endos interacting, I know people who are anti-endo but don't like anti-endos interacting, and like this I can go on a long day

People stablishing their boundaries isn't synonym of they saying their stance, and if you assume someone's stance based on a boundary you're part of the problem Yes, I'm aware some boundaries align with some stances, but you can't know if that' the case without the person telling you about that

And then comes the people who feel they're morally superior or shit like that because they break someone's boundaries just to start attacking them or a stances fight (I have seen this in both endos and CDD) and that's a horrible shitty behavior

If you break someone else's boundaries (talking about endo/pro-endo/anti-endo interacting boundaries) you can't get mad if they or someone else breaks yours, you did it first you have to appeal the consequences

The system community is a shitty toxic place thanks to problems like this, if endos and CDD systems don't have basic respect to one another we can't evolve as a better community

Both sides are haters, like to fight and then get mad when people fight back (not everyone, but a lot of people do)

I see this attitude more with endos/pro-endos and that's worst, the same endos/pro-endos that get mad because someone broke their boundary, fight back or just don't feel comfortable with them interacting are the same ones who do shit to that people

If endos/pro-endos come and attack CDD systems just for having a boundary they're just spreading hate and shit, and that system might become an anti-endo just because they harras them, don't you see this kind of people just make their own problem?

None of the two sides is safe, they both complain about the other side bitting but they also bite

Be mature, respect boundaries, don't assume others stances and stop harassing/attacking people with different stances/boundaries

Remember, if you perpetuate one of this behaviors you're not helping anything, your just making this worst and help the problem grow out

Vent post

Why everytime a professional in mental health tells you something that you already know hit so fucking hard and makes me wanna cry?

In our today's session our psychologist told us "Yes... Those are post traumatic stress symptoms" and we knew, we are aware of that, but it fucking hurts so bad and when we heard it from her we felt so horrible and bad, like the body reacting bad when you hear something you shouldn't

We knew we have it, why does it hurts and feels so bad when