"Oh, Hey Dude, How's It Going?" "Good, Good, You?" "Great, I'm Good, I'm Good" *leaves* "I Have No Idea

"Oh, hey dude, how's it going?" "Good, good, you?" "Great, I'm good, I'm good" *leaves* "I have no idea who that man is"

"This is my father, my brother, my other brother, my sister, my newest brother, my other brother, and the leech"

"We are friendly acquaintances," "they are best friends"

Don't lose your head

A parody, based on Damian Wayne

I have too many thoughts about this and also too much time, enjoy:

Grew up in the alps

Of Nanda Parbat

Life was a chore so (he set sail)

Was sent to my dad came straight to the manor

Theres this British dude, lame

Epic fail

Ooh, I wanna fight and slash

Family? Not my thing

Ooh, but then my dad was dead

And soon my brother said, "You should try and get ahead"

He wanted me, huh, obviously

Selecting me as the perfect Robin

Couldn't be better, then he gave me the R and who am I kidding

I was pretty excited

Ooh, put on the R

Ooh, just wanna try

Ooh, you're the old guy?

I'll throw you off this dino, xo "Drakey"

(Oh-oh)

Here we go🙄

(You almost killed him!)

I didn't know he would find my grandfather!

(What?)

Get a life

(You sent him on his quest?)

Like, what was I meant to do?

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what I did

I'm just tryna have some fun

Don't worry, don't worry, don't lose your shit

I didn't mean to hurt anyone

(Not much anyway)

LOL, say oh well

Or go to hell

I'm sorry, not sorry 'bout what I did

Don't lose your shit

Two in the cave and the little one said

If you wanna help me, make up your mind

Him or me, chum

Don't wanna be the

Guy who get left or

Are you dumb?

Ooh, don't be bitter

Ooh, 'cause I'm fitter

Ooh, why hasn't it hit him?

He doesn't want you 'round here

Somebody kick you

(Oh-oh)

Here we go

(He did as you said!)

I didn't really mean it but here we are now

(Wow Dames, way to make the others hate you)

Mate, what was I meant to do?

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what I did

I'm just tryna have some fun

Don't worry, don't worry, don't lose your shit

I didn't mean to hurt anyone

(Not much at least)

LOL, say oh well

Or go to hell

I'm sorry, not sorry 'bout what I did

Don't lose your shit

Tried to kill

But the bat said nope

My only hope was learning

I got a promotion

Caused a commotion

Set in motion the Zoo of Wayne

The rules were so outdated

I wanted to chop som heads off

Soon, Morgan Ducard (dead!)

Everybody chill, its totes God's will

Batman's out every night on the street

After benching me, like what the hell?

If that's how it's gonna be

Maybe I'll break out of jail on three

Just to make him rage

Richard finds out and he goes mental

He screams and shouts

Like so judgemental

You damned brat!

Mate, just shut up

I wouldn't be such a b-

If you'd just let me out

(Oh-oh)

Here we go

(Is that what you said?)

And now Tim's back with the real Bruce Wayne!

(No)

Yeah, that's definitely my dad

(Seems it)

What was I meant to do?

(What was he meant to do?)

Like what was I meant to do?

(What was he meant to do?)

No, but what was I meant to do?

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what I did

I'm just tryna have some fun

Don't worry, don't worry, don't lose your shit

I didn't mean to hurt anyone (by a lot)

LOL, say oh well

Or go to hell (he's going to hell)

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what he said

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said

Don't lose your shit

Thought:

Six the Musical but instead of Henry’s ex-wives, it’s Batman’s six Robins

Ex-Wives Ex-Robins

Fired (Dick)

Murdered (Jason)

Moved on (Tim)

Fired (Steph)

Murdered (Damian)

Still on (Jarro)

We're fired, murdered, live!

[...]

Everybody knows that we used to be six Robins

But now we're ex-Robins

Gotham, make some noise!

All you ever hear and read about

Is our dad and the way it ended

But a pair doesn't beat a royal flush

You're gonna find out how we got un-adopted

Tonight we're gonna do ourselves justice (ha!)

[...]

Fired

My name's Nightwing, the first Robin

Was with him a whole ten years, I'm a paragon

Of heroing, my loyalty is to the citizens

So if you try to fire me

You won't try that again

Murdered

I'm that Red Hood guy

And I'm up next

See, I almost made him break his rule

Yeah, I'm that important

Why did I get blown up?

Well, my shorts may be green

But the Joker made them red!

Moved on

The third Robin, the only one he never chose

Untrue!

When his son was newly dead, I arrived

But I'm not what I seem

Or am I?

Stick around, and you'll suddenly see more

Fired

Spoiler! I'm the fourth Robin.

Ja

When he saw me fighting he was like

Ja!

But I couldn't follow rules as well as Dick

Funny how we all discuss that, but never Batty's little

Prick up your ears, I'm the Robin who is blood-related

Murdered

Cause of his promiscuity outside of wed

Lock up your pets, and lock up your swords

D Robin is here, and the fun's begun

Still on!

Five down, I'm the final Robin

I'm always with him till the end of his life

I am the starfish, Jarro the great

I bet you wanna know how I got this far

I said, I bet you wanna know how I got this far

Do you wanna know how we got this far?

Thought:

Six the Musical but instead of Henry’s ex-wives, it’s Batman’s six Robins

Ultimate Spider-Man, Season 1 episode 9 "field trip".

"I hate field trips" -Peter Parker

He has canonically been bitten by an animal on all the field trips he's ever been on.

I'm just saying, we as a fandom don't use this enough in our field trip fics

High-key my favourite thing ever.

Duke waking up on his first birthday in the family: uhm... what's this?

Bruce, sighing: that would be Talia’s gift

Duke, picking up a sword laces with poison: ....neat

AU where Talia’s obsession with Bruce is tilted a little to the left and when Bruce adopts Dick she’s like !!!!! My beloved you should have told me you wanted children what a wonderful eldest son we have I want custody over summer I will train him to as the best Assassin the world has ever seen I love him so much etc etc Bruce and Dick are obviously freaked out a little by this.. anyway her response to not getting summer custody is to make Damian in her fake womb and not give Bruce custody (or knowledge of his existence). She is equally enthusiastic about each new addition to the family and they all get increasingly strange holiday and birthday gifts from her. When Dick first moved to Bludhaven he came home one day to League style daggers and a ‘I’m so proud of you, love, mom’ note on his kitchen counter and poison in all his food. When she gets hold of zombie!Jason she’s like ‘finally I get custody time to bond with my sons’. Damian is still completely fucked up when he gets to Gotham but this time the murder attempts are because of the lack of birthday gifts.

Damian Al Ghul ~

& Alfred the cat