Sadness Resounding

Sadness resounding

from the piano kills

all of my dreams

I sing

as you wrap yourself

in a blanket

I scream

I asked you to love

me deeper when I'm sad

You promised, I was glad

But why did you sleep

while I bleed?

Do lies taste better,

darling

when the love is dead?

-katie, 23:01

❤

12 months and counting...

You are the blessing I didn't ask for but were given;

You are the miracle I didn't pray for but happened.

You happened. And my love, I've become my best version. Thank you for calming my storm. Now everything in me is pacific. Thank you for taming my demons. Now they kneel and wear golden halos.

Since you happened, the lips that refused to pray started uttering praises to God who made this blissful encounter possible.

Because you happened, I lift my hands up above, call out in the voice of a Seraphim as I feel my wings growing...

Wings that were severed when I-

I renounced my faith in love.

You happened, so I regained everything I ever lost from fear and doubt and wrath.

You are the gift I didn't ask for but were bestowed;

You are the guardian I didn't pray for but were sent to bring me home...

You were sent TO BE my HOME.

-god sent, katie

7th of March 2020 @23:30

If I could speak

to the heart

that is now dead

I would ask it

if it's colder

there, in the grave

If it tells me, yes

then I will stay here

with you

where your arms

wrap me

into a chilly embrace

-katie, 23: 20

But the parts that you claim

to love so tenderly

are the polished parts

Those free from flaws

covered in rich foundation

My love,

those are the easy parts

to love

How about embracing

the scars

the unsightly stretch marks

the eroding wave of sanity

all of the dark?

-katie, 21:00

I'm not a rug

or a carpet

you can walk into

Whenever you please

I'm a person

and I can be hurt

My heart, though

I trained

it to be strong,

can be broken

like a glass,

can be torn

like a paper

I can only take

what my cup

can contain

I will speak

I will scream

I won't be

silenced as though

your storm

can render me mute

But most importantly

I know where to exit

without second thoughts

I will leave

when I had enough

And I had enough

-katie, 20:00

And she learned

to sleep through the pain

for the night

won't make it go away

-katie, 09:01