Deep Summer Thoughts

Deep Summer Thoughts

A calling I cannot tone out

louder, bursts, unfolds, breaks up,

my legs, cold. The Light, it Speaks

to me, yet It won’t Shine in me.

Why won’t It look my way, have I

something done so cruel to drown It?

I look back, read the leaves of the

trees, each grain of sand. They shine,

like I used to. I go closer,

in longing, in desperation.

Yet they stab me, pierce my bones,

a cold, unspoken feeling.

I go deeper towards Him,

My Light. That warm feeling on

my skin, undressed. He kissed me

once, he’ll kiss me again.

As I touch him, and he me

they suck me in, obliviously.

I keep going deeper, thinking

that it is Him. Suddenly, no

warmth is felt on my bare

skin, no sweetness, it’s not fair.

They pull me in, drink me up.

Finally, they take my breath

Away. I no longer see the Light,

I no longer see My Sun. This

deep water that drowns love struck

souls, drowned me. Moonlight on

my skin, crazy whispers all come

in, I no longer have a purpose,

all I dream about is Him. Oh,

how oblivious I was! No wonder

they never let me in. I said

I’d be the last to pass, but

first I had to surrender, but

I couldn’t surrender Him.

Primrose

Everliving and Youthful

Your image that of Beatrice,

Heavenly, resembling of the days gone

But there is no regret up here, my Dear

Our likes sometimes Daft and Daredevil,

Yet Your presence to me never sufficient

As You are my life’s only elixir, my Dear

Death himself walked the Earth today and

Damned us both, my Dear

But I will never let go of You

Place Your faith in me as You pledge to me

The remainder of Your living moments

The Earth is crumbling at our fingertips, My Dear

My life mustn’t go on any further as I can’t

Bear Your absence

So I shall leave You with the kiss of Death,

For now.

May our fantasies end the plague, my Dear

And may You return to me

You always return, in Spring, kindred to

The Primroses that line Eden’s Garden

Outtakes

This bubble of joy I find myself in

Helps my world to not spin

Time is of the essence here,

Where the Gods are Queer

And walk amongst men

But I will say: Every now and then

I find myself wishing for the danger

but quickly I retreat away from the stranger

who may defeat me.

Not today, I won’t let me.

Although today is the day to truly be

Dancing, Dazzling with the Queen

The Queen? The Queen! for she

was right here, outside the bubble to the left

Wait… There I had just placed my weft

There… To the left.

In this world they spoke of enchanters

and master crafters

who’ll all keep you safe til the day you die

How that is guaranteed I know not why…

Yet no one told me of the opportunities outside the bubble

Outside the bubble! Beneath the rubble

Please take me in, I just want to live

I don’t care if you only have misfortunes to give

I didn’t want this at first, but now I’m torn.

My Fault. So I can’t mourn?

Calais

your heart rushes. my eyelashes flutter.

you both love and hate the lace of

my gloves, hugging my fingertips -

undeniable elegance obstructing

your skin from touching

mine. although, you could say the same

for the rest of my attire.

but we both know actions speak

louder than words.

candles

light the candles

watch the flame flicker

don’t get too close

don’t get burned please

feel the warmth

the warmth of my heart

smell the scent

i can’t escape this feeling