MC: When I Asked You To Bring Me Something Back From The Beach, I Meant Like A Conch Shell

MC: when i asked you to bring me something back from the beach, i meant like a conch shell

Mammon, struggling to hold a seagull: well you didn’t fucking say that

Xingqiu: you lying, cheating, piece of shit!

Chongyun: oh yeah? you’re the idiot who thinks he can get away with everything you do. welcome to the real world!

Xingqiu: im leaving you, and im taking razor with me!

Bennett, picking up the monopoly board: i think it’s time to stop playing now

Belphegor: how do i put myself in a coma without killing myself or giving myself permanent brain damage? My life sucks and i want to die but i think i might want to wake up later, plus i have a twin brother who i don’t want to scar

Belphegor: update: lol i don’t want to die, i just want to go to sleep for like a month

Belphegor: update 2: to all you idiots incapable of literacy, i didn’t ask how to improve my current circumstances, i asked how to induce a coma

Childe: i think i might’ve ate Xiao’s almond tofu

Childe: how long do you think i have to live?

Zhongli: five

Childe: five??? five what???

Zhongli: four

Childe: i went through an entire character arc during quarantine

Childe: i became more evil if you’re curious

Traveler: we’re still in quarantine, don’t worry, there’s time for a redemption arc still!

Childe: im going to get worse on purpose

MC: so you wanna head to my room?

Leviathan: sure...

MC: you have protection?

Leviathan: w-why what’s in there?