[10:48 PM]

[10:48 PM]

seconds after a short text, johnny is already at your side.

you’re already sobbing when he pulls you into his arms. you close your eyes and sob even harder as he cups your face in his hands so gently that you barely feel it. you look into his soft brown eyes, unstoppable tears streaming down your flushed cheeks.

“oh dear,” he murmurs as he pulls you closer and lets your tears wet his light blue hoodie. “who hurt you?” his face is overwhelmed by concern for you and he strokes your swollen cheek with one hand. 

you don’t respond but clench onto the fabric by his waist tighter as you burrow inside what seems like a perfect paradise, safe and separated from the rest of the world. you’re shaking and sobbing and everything in-between, and johnny wraps his strong arms around you quietly.

“i-i can’t do this,” you say, your voice cracking as you speak the words. you’re looking at him, into his eyes that almost seem to reflect the hurt you feel. 

he listens.

you tangle your fingers with his, using all four clasped hands to wipe your tears. “i need to run away so bad.”

“i’d love to take you with me,” he breathes, “but you know i can’t.”

you would smile, but you can’t. “i know.” you know too well. you lean back into his chest as he leans his head on yours, and wrap your arms around his waist firmly - as if he’s a lifeline. “i know.” 

johnny presses a kiss to your head and gently pats your back as you continue to sob, each choked cry shattering his heart even more.

[9:57 pm]

bad boy!lucas loves it when you call him luca. you’d misheard his name the first time you met at a coffee shop, his eyes flirtatious but his cheeks rosy pink as he tried to flirt with you. you were different, somehow. 

maybe it was the way your pretty brown eyes glimmered amusedly as he introduced himself with a slight stammer that even he didn’t know was capable from his confident persona. maybe it was the way your slender, pretty hands tucked strands of soft black hair behind your ear when they fell to cover your eyes. maybe it was the perfect girl-next-door aura you seemed to radiate - the girl everyone’s parents would want them to marry, the girl everyone in the community showered with love because she did the same.

lucas doesn’t know why he was drawn to someone so different from himself at the first glance, but he hadn’t had the opportunity to give it a second thought since he fell into your eyes - a beautiful brown ocean he knew he loved to get lost in. 

he thinks the name luca had a different feel to it than his actual name: a typical name for a boy-next-door, perhaps. it makes him feel as if he is closer to you mentally, especially as he tucks your hair behind your ear and softly cups your cheeks with his big hands - his fingers stretching to support the back of your neck - as he leans in to kiss you. you feel him smiling, and know he can feel the same. you pull him closer by wrapping your arms around his neck with a giggle.

he knows you love him for whoever he is, but he has an overwhelming, insatiable desire to feel even closer to you. lucas would gladly become luca if it would make your parents like him even a bit more - if it would let you love him forever.

2.9.2020

[happy birthday johnny, i love you]

you can never forget johnny - because of his big heart, yes, but also because of all the little things he’d do.

he’d constantly show up with small gifts at your door because he remembered something random you said one time - like the time you told him that you watched a lot of dora as a kid and that boots was your favorite character, and he bought you a mini-boots plushie at the airport months later because it reminded him of you. 

he’d send you videos of him kissing the camera repeatedly when he missed you, spamming your phone with “i love you so much” texts until you were giggling hysterically at his persistence in getting you to say it as many times as he was saying it. 

he’d be so eager to model for your photography or art, although you knew he probably wanted to be away from the camera on days he was off. johnny claimed that you taking a picture of him was different somehow - he loved to see how you saw him.

he’d slip one hand into your hair as you kissed, careful that you wouldn’t strain your neck because he was so much taller than you, and he’d wrap the other arm around your waist.

he’d bow deeply to your parents and would help them wash the dishes after each meal - although they told him not to since he was a guest - conversing smoothly with them until all of them were laughing at his stories. the true highlight, though, was slipping your hand into his clammy one at the end of the day as he confessed how nervous he’d been in case he slipped up in front of your parents. you would giggle, tippy-toe to press a kiss to his cheek, and tell him that wouldn’t happen. your parents adored him.

he’d drum his fingers in a specific pattern whenever he thought of you; the pattern that the both of you later found out was morse code for “my love.” johnny had the faintest memory of memorizing morse code in middle school, but hadn’t realized that it was still embedded in his subconsciousness. 

you had loved him all the more.

renhyuck antics

[11:05 am]

every time you and best friend!mark break into laughter at another stupid joke, both of you subconsciously smack best friend!johnny’s shoulder, causing johnny to playfully shout “ow!” as he leans back from the both of you.

[1:28am]

assassin!jaehyun presses his hand to your rifle, stepping between you and your target. you’d known he would try to stop you when he found out your assigned target was his civilian brother - but you didn’t think the pleading look in your partner’s eyes would hurt as much.

“move, jaehyun,” you tell him sternly, your voice cracking ever so slightly as you speak his name.

“you can’t do this,” he says, completely covering your line of fire by pressing his chest to the tip of your rifle. his eyes beg with you as you push him with the weapon. “(y/n), just for old time’s sake, please.”

you had previously knocked the target out for a quick death due to your guilt when jaehyun stepped in. your eyes flickered to his trembling hands that had set his brother more comfortably on the floor while you were frozen in shock from his sudden appearance.

“you know i have to, jae,” you shove him with the tip of your rifle again. “we both know what happens to my family if i don’t. move, or i’ll shoot.” it’s a blatant lie, and your voice shakes as you tell it.

jaehyun’s eyes harden. “no.”

you tear up at the prospect of having to fight and possibly kill your best friend, partner, and long-time love. “jaehyun, please.” it was you begging now. “i don’t want to hurt you, but i will.” if you shot through jaehyun’s heart, he would surely die - especially since you were firing from so close.

“he’s my only family, (y/n),” jaehyun says, taking a step closer as your rifle presses into his chest. he takes a deep breath. “you can shoot me. tell them i stopped you and he got away. it’ll be convincing if i die.”

“i can’t do that,” you breathe, tears in your eyes. it was so unlike you to be emotional during a mission, but it was different when jaehyun was involved.

“please,” jaehyun says. his eyes have that flame of determination that you glimpse whenever he finishes off a target - except this time, the target is himself. “please. for me. let dohyun escape, maybe hide him.”

this won’t end the way either of you want it to, and you know it.

you throw your rifle to the floor. “fight me,” you tell him.

jaehyun is only the slightest bit surprised. he’s probably anticipated this, observing your thought process as your partner for several years.

the both of you kick, swing, and punch each other with impossible agility, jaehyun careful to block you from his brother every time you get too close. you land multiple punches on his jawbone as he kicks you in the stomach.

but you can feel that neither jaehyun nor you are fighting with full power.

“i won’t hold back anymore,” you say, slightly out of breath.

“neither will i,” jaehyun smiles slightly, and slides under you as you whip around, anticipating a sudden attack.

you hadn’t thought he would grab your rifle and shoot his own heart.

“jaehyun!” you scream, and rush to his side as he coughs out blood. your fingers tremble as you press the wound in futile hopes that it would magically seal.

he tries to lean on the wall, but to avail - he slides back down in pain, a smear of blood left on the wall.

you cup his face in your bloody hands, lip trembling as you speak. “i hate you so much.”

he looks like he would laugh if it wasn’t too painful. “is that all you have to say?”

you let out a deep sigh while looking into his eyes. they look happier than you’d ever seen them after a flame. “i have too much to say.”

“i do, too,” jaehyun breathes, and coughs out some more blood as you wipe it from his mouth with worried eyes. both of you know his wound is too severe - you’ve both taken several medical classes and witnessed several deaths and know when a wound is absolutely fatal. he smiles, his dimples bloody. “you know, i love you.”

your eyes widen.

“this probably isn’t the best place,” jaehyun jokes, then winces as he forces a laugh back down his throat, “or time. but i don’t think i could die without telling you. you know? i don’t want a respons-”

“i love you too,” you blurt, and jaehyun’s eyes widen in surprise. you press your forehead against his. “i just... wish we had more time.”

jaehyun wonders if it would be disgusting to kiss you when he’d just coughed out blood, but you beat him to it, the taste of death lingering between breaths.

his eyes flutter closed as he presses one last kiss to your lips, murmurs a last plea to help his brother, and whispers a last breath proclaiming “i love you.”