Batman Is Dramatic And I Will Die On This Hill - Tumblr Posts

Bruce figured out their civilian identities pretty quickly. He had to, in order to recruit them. Either way, he knew the names of all of the Justice League heroes and they had no idea who he was.

Most of them either ignored their personas - like Wonder Woman and Green Lantern who didn't talk about their civilian life in costume or vice versa - while others - Superman - sang their own praises as civilians.

Superman's whole having three names thing was useful, and a pretty good cover, but Batman had spotted that the relationship between Clark Kent and Lois Lane was the exact one that Superman and Lois Lane shared, so that was a bit of a moot point.

Personally, Bruce liked his way of keeping people off his tail. Not only were Brucie Wayne and Batman polar opposites, but they were both each other's biggest haters. Although, Bruce publicly admitted that he thinks Batman has the right idea, just not the best execution. While Batman, not on record but definitely heard, has said that Bruce Wayne does good things for Gotham as a whole.

The kids all think it's hilarious, but no one - except Tim, but he's a special case - has managed to cement his civilian and caped identities as being the same person.

Well, maybe Harvey has, but that's because of a lot of reasons. As long as Two Face doesn't reveal that information, and Bruce knows he won't, then all's well.

The point is that Batman knows who the Justice League are outside of capes and masks, but they don't know who he is. Of course, revealing himself would mean revealing his kids, and they wouldn't like that if he was boring about it.

The only natural solution is to be over the top and dramatic about it.

He could keep his name to himself, but where's the fun in that?

Though, it'd be funnier if he managed to keep the appearance of Batman and Bruce Wayne hating each other, especially if he reveals that the Bat Cave is under Wayne Manor.

That'd be funny. His kids would be proud.

His kids will want in on this.

He's got some conspiring planning to do.

Storyboard Part 2

The plan was set and the game had begun.

There was a meeting on the Watchtower exactly three days after the Bat Clan had decided to mess with the Justice League, so that's when they planned to set everything in motion.

Robin couldn't be at the meeting because it fell during school hours, so Nightwing had come to the meeting with Batman. He'd already had the day off, so it wasn't too much of a hasel. Red Hood and Red Robin had both wanted to come, but they also had civilian duties to take care of.

When the meeting was over, the 'main leaguers', as many others had dubbed them, stayed behind as they always did. Normally, it was just so they all could catch up, sometimes to arrange another meeting, or even to discuss more sensitive topics.

This time, when everyone but Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, Green Arrow, Green Lantern, The Flash, Aquaman, Martian Manhunter, Cyborg, and Nightwing had left the room, Nightwing threw his arm across Batman's shoulders and said "You all should come to the Cave!"

All conversation stopped as everyone turned to look at the black and blue clad vigilante. For a long moment, no one spoke or moved. Then, Batman nodded.

"Perfect!" Nightwing's smile got even bigger.

"Um," Superman, the sweet midwesterner, flicked his eyes over to Batman's face before looking at Nightwing. "Are you sure? Bat's has never let any of us into Gotham, let alone the Bat Cave."

Nightwing winked at the hero, his domino mask not hiding it, "Yeah, well, me and the others managed to wear him down. Besides, we've all wanted to give you guys a tour! We've been to all your secret hideouts, so we figured it's about time you saw ours!"

"I'm sorry," Green Lantern raised his hand slightly, "'Others'?"

Nightwing blinked, his smile dropping. Batman straightened up. "Did you-" Nightwing cut himself off, "You do know how many of us there are in Gotham, right?"

The heroes all looked at one another. Sure, they'd heard that there was two, maybe three, working with Batman, but nothing had ever been confirmed aside from Robin working with Batman and Nightwing working in Bludhaven.

Batman fought very hard to keep a smirk off his face. Nightwing didn't even try to hide his amusement.

Wonder Woman was the one to ask, "There are rumors, but I can't say any of us know exactly how many heroes work within Gotham City limits."

Nightwing and Batman shared a glance. This added so much more to their game. They had to tell the others! This was already so much fun, but it was about to get so much better!

"Then, I guess you all have no choice but to come to the Cave with us so you can meet everyone!" Nightwing exclaimed.

The eight heroes shared looks with one another before looking back at Batman and Nightwing. Their choice was obvious to the two Bats before the group had even decided.

"Alright," Aquaman said, "When would you like us to stop by?"

Right on script. Batman said, "Meet here tomorrow at fifteen-hundred New Jersey time. We'll be here to bring you down to the Cave." Then, he left, Nightwing trailing behind him.

"Cool," Flash nodded, "Cool, cool. Totally not nerve wracking at all."

Cyborg stood from his seat. "Don't be nervous, Flash. We're actually being allowed in Gotham. Batman doesn't let anyone in Gotham."

"No," Green Arrow said, "He doesn't let anyone operate in Gotham. I've been many times."

"As Green Arrow or as a civilian?"

He fell silent and the others all laughed. He joined them.

"Regardless," Martian Manhunter said, "I think it's good he's allowing us to see his main base of operations."

"Yeah," agreed Superman, "I wonder what it'll be like."

Wonder Woman was the next to stand from her seat. "It will be quite the tour, I'm sure."

Part 2 Part 4

"Guys!" Nightwing shouted once he and Batman arrived in the main are of the Bat Cave, "I have some fantastic news!"

Bruce pulled his cowl off, his amusement no longer being hidden as he nearly failed to keep from laughing.

Everyone had gathered in the Cave to await the two who'd gone to the Watchtower, so everyone was already there to hear the exclamation. Even Alfred was with them all.

"Calm down, Big Bird," Jason said from his place on the meeting table, "What's going on?"

Dick was bouncing on the balls of his feet, "Can I tell 'em, B? Can I, can I?!"

Bruce chuckled, "I'm not stopping you."

He cheered before turning back to the rest of his family, "They think there's a total of three-" he held up three fingers on his left hand, "-of us operating within Gotham, myself excluded because I'm in Bludhaven."

"Wait," Stephanie called, "They think Batman only has three people helping to cover Gotham? They know we're human, right?"

Dick shook his head, his grin only getting bigger. "Nope! They think Batman only has two sidekicks covering Gotham with him."

This caused everyone to laugh, the humor breaking any seriousness anyone would've tried to control to keep on topic. It was nice, Bruce smiled, to be able to let loose with everyone like this. His family was altogether, spending time with one another, doing things that didn't include head hunts or injuries.

Alfred took his place beside Bruce. "This is nice, isn't it."

"It is."

"You can die a happy man now?"

A chuckle. "You killing me off so soon?"

"Of course not, Master Bruce," He's smirking, "I'm simply stating a fact."

"Ha!"

"What're you guys talking about over there?" Tim called. Everyone had gathered at the meeting table to go over final details and slight changes for the set up tomorrow. "C'mon! We've gotta finish putting this all together."

Duke nodded from over his shoulder, "Yeah! New information allows room for some much more fun!"

Jason smirked. "Yeah, old man, Alfred! We want to see if we can get away with switching out with each other. It'll confuse the hell outta the Leaguers."

Bruce raised an eyebrow as he and Alfred joined the kids at the table. "How are you going to pull that off? Despite what you all may thing, the others are all a lot more observant than given credit for-"

"Except the Flash and Green Arrow." Cass cut in.

"Hey!" Dick said, "Don't dis Barry like that!"

"Yeah," Barbra agreed, "And Ollie's whole thing is spotting details. He prides himself on it!"

"If that were true, then we wouldn't be planning on how to mess with them, now would we?"

Tim nodded, "Damian's right."

"As you were saying?" Bruce prompted.

"Well," Jason continued, "You, Damian, and Dick have to be here as Batman, Nightwing, and Robin. They all probably know about me, so I'll stay out of the Cave, but you can bet your ass that I'll be in the Clocktower with Babs, listening in on everything." He looked to Tim and Babs. "Should we set up cameras?"

Tim thought for a second, "If we want to record this, then yeah. I can have them all set up by morning."

"I'll help you set it up before I head out tonight," Barbra agreed.

"Anyway," Stephanie interrupted, pulling the attention to herself, "Tim, Cass, and I could totally get away with running around and messing with their senses and shit. And if we can get Kate and Selina in on this-"

"You've already talked to them, haven't you." Bruce asked. The matching grins on everyone's faces was answer enough. He sighed.

"Having fun," Cass patted his arm, "Bonding."

He snorted. 'Bonding', yeah right. Maybe letting his coworkers be the target of his childrens' whims is a bad idea. Then again, their not hurting anyone. It's all fun in games.

Bruce sat at the head of the table. "Alright. We all know about Superman's ability to hear heartbeats and breathing patterns. He's able to memorize someone's vitals, especially his friends. It's safe to assume he's got mine down, as well as Robin's and Nightwing's."

Damian scoffed. "Changing my vitals will be no issue for me."

Bruce nodded, "Me, either."

Dick nodded along, "Soundseasy enough. But what's the plan?"

"Oracle will call you out for an emergency in Bludhaven. Red Hood will call me out for some information at the docks. We'll met up at the Clocktower and switch costumes." he explained.

Barbra had a manic look on her face. "We should have Steph and Cass stay away from the Cave at first, then have them come in separately, but sharing a costume." SHe turned her attention to the blonde. "You have a spare Spoiler costume, yeah?"

Stephanie matched her grin, "Naturally."

"What about me, Tim, and Damian?" Duke asked.

"How would you and Tim like to be actual bats?" the red head wondered, "Or maybe ghosts?"

"Do we get to mess with shit?" Tim asked.

"Naturally."

"I'm in," the two responded.

"Damian will run distraction," Jason said," He'll be the only one who stays with the JL the whole time they're here. Alfred will have to keep cover upstairs. I'll bounce between the Manor, the Clocktower, and patrol."

"Are you quite sure?" Alfred asked, "That's quite a lot to be doing."

"Yeah, I'll be fine," he assured.

Brice cleared his throat. "If everyone's ready?" Looks around the table before nods of affirmation. "Good. Finish up any last minute changes and preparations. They've agreed to meet at the Watchtower at fifteen hundred New Jersey time so that I can bring them here. Damian, I want you to come with me."

"Of course, father."

"Ready? Break."

Part 3 Part 5

Tag List: @sebas-nights

At exactly three in the afternoon, New Jersey time, the next day, Batman and Robin took the Zeta Tube up to the Watchtower to gather the waiting heroes for their promised tour of the Batcave.

Jason and Barbra were set up in the clocktower, watching the cameras Tim had set up the night before to record everything. Dick was at the Batcomputer, watching for alerts in case anyone decided to cut their fun short. Stephanie and Cass were on standby in the Manor with Alfred, setting up a movie night to watch the recordings before they were to head down to the Cave to interchangeably play Spoiler. Duke and Tim were both in the Cave, hidden in the rafters in their stealth suits. Kate and Selina had both agreed to help mess with the Justice League, neither actually knowing their identities, and were patrolling Gotham in place of Duke while they waited for part two of the plan.

The plan was set as follows, with room for improv and any missteps: -Batman and Robin gather the heroes from the Watchtower and bring them down to the Batcave -Nightwing meets them and joins in on the tour -Oracle calls Nightwing away for an emergency in Bludhaven -Batwoman would then call Batman away to help out against Red Hood in Crime Alley (that was so that they'd all keep thinking that Red Hood and Batman were still on bad terms. all the better to surprise Wonder Woman when she came to the Manor for the gala) -Steph, as Spoiler, would enter the Cave via the Lane and join Robin and the JL for a tour. She and Cass would then switch out at random intervals, basically gaslighting everyone - especially Superman - into thinking they're the same person -Nightwing and Batman would met up at the Clocktower to switch costumes. Dick becomes Batman while Jason and Bruce go to the Manor in civvies to show that they're under a residence -Duke and Tim, meanwhile, move things around the Cave as they please. At some point, Tim and Damian switch out, but don't acknowledge the switch -NightBat (Nightwing as Batman) comes back to the Cave, sending Steph and Cass back out and to the Manor in civvies, and Duke goes to take over for Batwoman and Catwoman -NightBat and Bruce meet in the locker rooms, while Red Robin distracts the JL, to change back into Batman and Nightwing -Batman rejoins the JL and RR while Nightwing goes back to get his bike and reenter the Cave via the Lane -Robin switches out with Red Robin who resets the Cave, putting everything back in its place as quickly as he can without being noticed -Nightwing comes back -Oracle calls out an emergency at the GCPD -The JL leave

Obviously, they all had comms in and were listening in on everything.

"Exactly on time." Green Arrow nods as Batman and Robin step out of the Zeta Tubes.

Wonder Woman smiles, "How are you doing today, Robin?"

Robin nods to her. "I am well, thank you. And yourself?"

"I am as well as I can be."

"That's good."

The group stands in place for a moment, Batman and Robin doing nothing to alleviate the nervous energy of the heroes in front of them. Eventually, it's Flash who breaks.

"Well, look at the time!" the speedster claps his hand together, "We don't want to be late, right?"

Superman nods in agreement. "Yeah." He turns to the two Gotham vigilantes, "Lead the way."

Batman nods and turns to put the coordinates for the Cave into the computer, authorizing the heroes to access the Batcave just this once. He motions to the Zeta Tubes and Robin steps in. Superman, Wonder Woman, Green Arrow, Martian Manhunter, Green Lantern, Flash, Cyborg, and Aquaman all take turns to follow him. Batman goes last.

Once in the Cave, the Gotham vigilantes allowed the Justice League heroes a few minutes to gawk. The cavern they were in was nothing special. It was a branch off from near the outskirts of the Cave, far enough away to stop any intruders that somehow got passed the Zeta security, but close enough that it only took a few minutes to reach the main cave. There were three Zeta Tubes set up in the small area with a security desk and computer to arm or disable any traps. A matching desk sat at the other end of the trapped hallway.

Entering the main area of the Cave, the JL took another few minutes to drink in the sight. Batman and Robin allowed them to. Nightwing didn't turn his chair yet, waiting for th perfect moment to announce himself.

"Is that- Why do you have a dinosaur in here?" Flash asked, having done a double take at the sight. The others join him.

Nightwing took the cue and spun the Batchair around dramatically. "To eat intruders."

The heroes turned to him as one unit, Lantern, Flash, Aquaman, and Cyborg openly gawking at the Batcomputer.

"Nightwing," Wonder Woman greeted, "It's good to see you."

"What the hell!" Cyborg cut in, holding himself back from running to the computer, though he speed-walked up to it. "It's beautiful."

"Isn't she?" Nightwing smirked, "B built her all by himself. The monitors are all TVs, custom wired to fit the frameless design."

"All seven?" Aquaman asked.

Nightwing nodded. "Yep! And the computer itself was custom, too! I helped with that, actually. It used to be a combination of three computers connected to the monitors, but I helped him condens it down to one shell connected to all seven monitors. RR keeps up the maintenance, though."

Green Arrow and Green Lantern also walked up to the desk. "It's an impressive display," Arrow said, "How long did it take?" He directed the question to Batman who joined the group, the rest coming up behind him.

"Three years and two months," the vigilante answered, "Two years to get everything together and wired properly. Another two months after Nightwing joined me as Robin to condense the three computers into one shell. A year to get everything coded and the firewalls up. As technology changes and programing gets better, so does the Batcomputer. She's intelligent all on her own, but RR and O are working on an AI for her."

"Who's-" Green Lantern was cut off by an alarm on the upper-most left monitor.

"Batcave, this is Oracle." she said, her voice coming through all the speakers in the Cave.

"Go ahead, O," Nightwing turned his chair back to face the computer, his hands flying between the three keyboards as he pulled up what the alarm was for .

"There's a problem in Bludhaven, 'wing, how fast can you be there?"

He pulled up a map of his home turf, seeing the false alarm at the BHPD. Though, what the Justice League didn't know wouldn't hurt them. "The bank on main, right?"

"That's the one."

"I'll be there in twenty tops."

"Alright."

Nightwing pushed the chair back, turning it and standing in one swift motion. Quickly, he made his way to where his bike was parked in the garage on the lower level of the Cave.

"Comms with Oracle," Batman ordered.

"As always!" he called back, pulling his helmet on before quickly peeling out of the Cave.

It was quiet as the sounds of the motorcycle faded out into the renovated cave system beneath the Crime Capital of the Country.

"Should we..." Martian Manhunter started, "Does he need help?"

Robin scoff lightly. "He will be fine. If he could not handle a minor bank robbery by himself, he would have died before transferring his mantle of Robin onto the next."

"Oh?" Aquaman turned his full attention to the child, "Who took the name after Nightwing?"

Robin didn't answer. Instead, he pointed to the dinosaur. "Our old costumes are kept on display downstairs by the penny. Would you like to see them?"

Wonder Woman, only falling second to Batman when children are involved, nodded. "Would you show the way?"

"Naturally." Taking the lead, Robin lead the group of heroes down the stairs and to the lower part of the Cave.

The upper, main, part of the Cave held the Batcomputer, the main entrances to the Manor, the Zeta Tubes, the lab, the meeting table, and the small med bay. The lower bar of the Cave was home to the training room, the displays, the large med bay, the Vault, the Batplane, and the garage.

"You really leaned into the whole gimmick, huh?" Superman nudged Batman with his elbow.

Cyborg watched him from the corner of his eye. "What do ya mean?"

The kryptonian pointed up. "There's about two hundred bats hanging up on the ceiling.

Flash flinched in on himself. "What?"

"This was their home before I took my name," Batman explained shortly.

Another alarm went off before anyone else could speak, though it was from Batman's gauntlet. He stepped away from the group knowing fully that they all could still hear.

"Hey, B!" Batwoman greeted, a smile evident in her voice.

"Batwoman," he responded. He hid his amusement as his coworkers stared at him in shock. "What's wrong."

"You remember Red Hood, right?"

"Obviously."

"Well, I've gotten into a bit of a pickle."

Batman cut her off with a sigh. "Send your coordinates, I'm on my way."

"Fantastic! Bring your grapple!" Then, she hund up.

"Is this a bad day?" Green Lantern asked, "We can leave and come back another day."

"Don't be ridiculous." Robin scolded, "I am more than capable of showing you around the Cave alone." He turned to his father, "Give Batwoman my greetings."

Batman grunted as he got into the Batmobile. Swiftly, he closed the door, turned the engine, and left the Cave.

Part 4 Part 6

Spoiler took her cue about five minutes after Batman left for the Watchtower to ride into the Cave. The heroes were with Robin by the display of their costumes, paying special respect to Jason's memorial. She made sure to rev the engine of her bike further down the tunnel to announce her arrival.

"Spoiler," Robin greeted her after she'd parked and pulled off her helmet. "These are some of the heroes in the Justice League. They were invited by Batman and Nightwing to come see the Cave."

Spoiler grinned widely at the group, "Hey! Nice to meet you all, I'm Spoiler." She'd never met the group during her few months as Robin, but her suit sta proudly between Tim's and Damian's.

"We weren't aware that there was another hero working in Gotham," Martian Manhunter nodded to her in greeting.

She gasped, her right hand moving do sit directly on the purple bat on her chest. "There are heroes operating in Gotham?" At the confused looks from the group, she cackled and dropped her hand to sit on her hip, leaning her weight more onto her left foot. "We're vigilantes in Gotham. We work outside the law, not alongside it."

"But, Batman-"

"-works with the law when working with the Justice League," Robin cut Cyborg off, successfully pulling everyone's attention to him.

As soon as their eyes were off of her, Cass switched out with her. It was seamless. SpoilerBat (Cass as Spoiler) emerged from her place in the darkest shadows of the Batplane, tapping Spoiler on the shoulder and pointing to the training room. She caught Robin's eye as Spoiler left, nodding and using the LoA signs to tell him the switch was done.

Robin nodded and continued his explanation of the displays, not naming anyone. "Batman's suits are all lined up on the upper tier. He improves them based on his needs and the changes of technology he has at his disposal, resulting in the nine suits you see, as well as the tenth that he's currently wearing. Robin's and Batgirl's suits are lined upon the middle tier. From left to right we have Robin 1, Batgirl 1, Robin 2," He didn't mention that this one was obviously a memorial. "Batgirl 2, Robin 3, Robin 4, Batgirl 3, Batgirl 4, Robin 5.1, Robin 5.2, Robin 5.3, Robin 5.4, and Robin 5.5." He adjusted his stance as SpoilerBat came to stand next to him.

"The lower tier are suits for others in Gotham," she explained, expertly ignoring the whispers about her being a different person a few minutes ago, "Same order: Discowing, Nightwing 1, Nightwing 2, Nightwing 3, Nightwing 4, Redwing, and Nightwing 5." she pointed as she named them, skipping over all five of Jason's suits, as well as the sixth empty one for his current costume, "Red Robin 0, Red Robin 1, Red Robin 2, Red Robin 3, Red Robin, 4, Drake, Red Robin 5, Spoiler, Black Bat, Orphan, Signal." Of the named suits, four suits were missing; Nightwing 5, Red Robin 5, Robin 5.5, and Spoiler.

Because the stealth suits were made specifically to be stealthy, they were never displayed in the open. Instead, they were kept in the locker rooms. No one who didn't know they had them knew any of them were even missing.

"Why are there so many?" Superman wondered.

"We all operate out of the Batcave." Robin stated as though it were obvious, "Our costumes change as we need them to."

"So," Flash began, getting close to the displays but no touching them, "Who all shares costumes? Or do they all belong to different people?"

Robin and SpoilerBat shared a quick look, neither wanting to explain. Let them think what they want. Skewing the numbers via omission will only help their plans along, as well as work to keep their identities.

Moving on, Robin told of how the penny and the dinosaur had come to be in the Cave. He warned to keep away from the edges because of the chasm.

"Chasm?" Aquaman had a smirk on his face, "Why do you need a chasm?"

"To keep the dragons." Robin said. he and SpoilerBat led the way to the garage. "The platform the Batplane rises and lowers as needed. The area above it is a door that can only be opened via remote in the plane itself or via command on the Batcomputer. Over there is the garage. The Batmobile, the Batcycle, the Wingcycle, Ricochet, the Redbird, the Batpod, the Spoilermobile, and Spoiler's motorcycle. Honestly, he turned to SpoilerBat, speaking to Spoiler, "You still haven't named your motorcycle?"

SpoilerBat shrugged.

Green Arrow took his time to look over every present vehicle. "Impressive. None of these are mainstream."

"That's because they're all custom made." Robin preened.

"Really?" Flash asked, bouncing like an excited puppy, "Which one's yours, little man?"

Robin scowled, but didn't address the name. "The Batcycle is the one I am permitted to use. Although, Batman has given his consent for me to drive the Batmobile in case of emergencies."

Cyborg was looking over Ricochet, Red Hood's bike, closely. "This doesn't look like any of the others."

"How do you mean?" SpoilerBat tilted her head slightly to the right.

"It's got the obvious base of a Harley Davidson," he pointed out, "It's also a lot less tech focused than the others."

"The second Robin build that bike from scratch," Robin said shortly, "Do not touch it."

"Right, sorry."

SpoilerBat decided to lead the way to the training area. Robin followed behind the group.

The training area was a clump of four offshoots from the main area of the lower level of the Batcave. The widest area was full of standard gym equipment. In the offshoot to the left was a taller cavern full of gymnastics equipment. The offshoot to the right was weapons training. The offshoot directly across from the main area was for sparring matches on mats or in the ring.

Wonder Woman regarded the gymnastics set up with a keen eye. "You all are trained, yes?" SpoilerBat nodded. "Can we see a routine?"

"Sure," SpoilerBat said. She stepped up to the starting point of the obstical course they had yet to take down from last week. Taking a deep breath, she began. About halfway through, she was out of the heroes' sight long enough to land in the rafters that Duke, Tim, and Steph and occupied temporarily. When she landed, Steph jumped down to continue the routine as Spoiler.

Having finished the routine, Spoiler landed, breathed again, and then jogged to rejoin Robin and the Justice League. A minute nod from the littlest bat let her know that the visiting heroes didn't see the switch. "So, what'dya think?"

Green Lantern did a double take. After a few false starts, he finally managed, "Are-are you a different person?"

Spoiler tilted her head to the right in a perfect imitation of Cass. "What're ya talking about? I'm the same me you met!"

Green Lantern didn't say anything more, choosing instead to follow the others as they explored the sparring mats and the weapons room.

Green Arrow and Martian Manhunter were the ones to take the most interest in this room. The wall on either side of the opening was dedicated to storing all kinds of weapons. The left side of the wall directly opposite the opening was a shooting range for all kinds of ranged weapons. The rest of the room housed training dummies.

"Let me guess," Aquaman admired the shorter ranged weapons, "You all forged these on your own, as well?"

Robin scoffed and crossed his arms. "Of course not. The swords were gifted to me by the finest of swordsmiths. The daggers as well."

"Yeah," Spoiler nodded along, "The only ones we actually produced are the Bird and Batarangs."

"Where do you get the materials?" Martian Manhunter inquired, holding one of the Batarangs to the light.

"There wasn't always a chasm." Red Robin said from where Robin had been standing. The Justice League heroes all whipped to look at him, dropping into ready stances. Red Robin held his hands up but didn't flinch or move back otherwise. "Whoa there, calm down. What spooked ya."

"Where's Robin?" Superman demanded.

Red Robin and Spoiler looked at each other. "What'd ya mean?" she asked, "He's right here."

"No," Flash looked between the two, around the room, and then back to Red Robin, "Robin is a child. You, decidedly, are not."

Red Robin huffed. "Are you okay? 'Cause I've been here the whole time?"

"Really?" Superman asked.

"Yeah," Red Robin crossed his arms. "Spoiler can vouch for me."

"Ah, but she can't!" Green Lantern pointed as though he'd caught them in a trap. "She's been switched out with someone else!"

Again, the two Gothamites shared a look behind their masks. "Alright," Red Robin shrugged, "This is an enclosed space with exactly one accessible exit-" if you don't know your way around, that is, "-if we were being switched out, where would they hide and why wouldn't Superman have been able to hear them?"

The answer is the sheer number of bats. The rafters are high and hidden enough in the ceilings that they blend in with the natural formations. The bats hang from the rafters. Because there are so many of the animals, and because of their training and spite, the Batfam have been able to hide their heartbeats within the throws of bats'. Superman's hearing would be able to pick up any sound that doesn't match with the nocturnal animals. The flutter of a cape could easily be the flutter of a bat's wings. The heartbeats that are slightly too slow are easily taken to be an older, sleeping bat. Movement is just a bat that's been disturbed.

The heroes were all quiet as Superman listened intently. Then, after a few minutes, he sighed and shook his head. "I can't hear anything out of the ordinary."

"But-!" Flash tried.

Red Robin shook his head. "If you guys are too paranoid about being here, we can take you back to the Zeta Tubes. I don't think we'd be able to convince B to let you come back here, though."

"No," Wonder Woman composed herself, "We apologise. Please, continue."

Hesitant, RR turned to take them to the large med bay. "Alright, if you're sure."

Part 5 Part 7

"I think we upset them." Dick said as he plopped down onto the couch beside Barbra, using her lap as a pillow.

"They're big kids," Kate shrugged, "They can handle it."

"Though," Jason said, "They may try to get revenge once it all comes to light."

"'If'," Tim corrected, "You think they'd be able to pull a prank on B? Or any of us?"

"Don't get cocky, Tim," Bruce admonished lightly, "They'll catch on eventually, and I don't doubt that they'll try their hands at revenge."

"Try?" Selina smirked.

Bruce smirked back. "They all have yet to be able to get anything directed at me to skip my notice. With all of us being the targets? Nothing'll slip by."

"All of us are detectives, Drake," Damian added, "And half of us were trained by assassins."

Duke gasped dramatically. "Is that praise I hear from our littlest brother?

Damian shoved him off his seat before taking it for himself. "You must be imagining things, Thomas."

Duke laughed, shifting to sit more comfortably on the floor. Stephanie threw a blanket and pillow at him.

Cass smiled from her own spot on the floor, her head leaning against Stephanie's knees. "Had fun."

Steph grinned. "It was a lot of fun, huh?"

"Don't go writing off Phase Two yet!" Jason shook his head.

Selina and Kate nodded. "Yeah," the red-head agreed, "We didn't even get to do anything yet!"

Barbra projected the camera feed from the past few hours in the Cave onto the screen in the room. "Don't worry, we've still got a few weeks to plan and send out invites."

The group settled in, popcorn and drinks and snacks having been distributed by Alfred. Once everyone was seated, Barbra hit play on the recorded security feed.

Each of their own perspectives had been funny, put it was even better to have the sound with the whole picture.

Part 7 Part 9

Phase Two of the plan was set to take place during the next Wayne Gala. Meaning they had exactly four weeks to plan out every meticulous detail. It was going to be great.

Week One

Planning for a gala is never easy. Planning for a Wayne Gala is even harder. Invitations, as per social standard, must go out at least four weeks prior to the event, so the guest list was first priority. Tim was put in charge of this. He elected the help of Luke Fox.

"Dude, you are never going to believe what Bruce did."

Luke sighed. "I leave for one month- What'd B do?"

Tim grinned up at him. "We're pranking the Justice League."

A beat. "What?"

"We're pranking the Justice League."

"Okay... Why?" He asked. "Better question: How? Don't they already know who you all are?"

Tim shook his head, pulling up the security feed from Phase One to send to his pseudo uncle. "They have no idea who we are behind our masks. Better yet, they have no idea how many of us actually operate within the city."

"There's no way."

"Right? I was so sure that they'd know by now, y'know? Because Superman has memorized our heartbeats, and we've met him both in and out of costume; Wonder Woman's Wonder Woman, and she has the Lasso of Truth- though, I'm pretty sure there's a way around that if she ever did try and get our names that way."

"And you called me here because..?" Luke prompted.

"Right!" Tim opened a different tab on his tablet. "I need you to help me make a guest list for the next Wayne Gala."

"Isn't that like, months out?"

"Not anymore! We're throwing on in exactly four weeks, so this guest list needs to be made now so that invitations can go out yesterday."

Luke raised an eyebrow.

Tim met his gaze. "I said what I said. Will you help me or not?"

With another sigh, Luke relented. "Alright. You can fill me in on everything later- And I do mean everything. I want every detail. Also, why didn't you pull me into this before?"

"We weren't sure if you'd be in town for this, and you were gone during Phase One. Also, we didn't actually intend on Selina and Kate being in on this, either. Well, maybe Kate."

"You got Selina and Kate in on this before me?" He looked absolutely heartbroken. "Wow. I thought I was your favorite."

Tim shook his head. "I'm pulling you in now, aren't I? Now, c'mon, we've got work to do.

The hardest part about setting up a Guest List is knowing the relationships between everyone. Everyone will be amicable with each other no matter who was invited, especially at an event hosted by the Wayne Family, but distaste for present company will be made known.

For this particular gala, there will be a mix of upper and middle class attendees to cover the odd additions that are the members of the Justice League.

"What's our priority, Tim?"

"Guest list, seating arrangements, and interference."

"'Interference'?"

"Who's going to stand between people if families of hostile relations run into each other."

Luke shook his head. "Rich people."

"Luke," Tim said, "I hate to break it to you, but you're 'rich people'."

A gasp. "I am? Tim! How could you do this to me?"

"I'm sorry, man," he shook his head sadly, laying his hand gently on Luke's arm, "But it's not my fault. It was your parents."

"My parents?"

"A betrayal of the worst kind."

"How could they!" he sobbed.

Tim rubbed his back, "I know. There, there."

"Tim? Luke?" Kate asked, walking into the office Tim had commandeered. "What they hell are you two doing in here?"

The two look up, sharing a laugh. "Nothing, Kate."

She raised here eyebrow skeptically, "Uh-huh, sure. Do you have a guest list set yet? We need to get invites made up and sent out."

"Almost," Tim answered.

Luke shrugged. "I still don't understand why we can't just host an open event. It'll make it so much easier."

"And risk our identities being released to the public?" Kate said, "Not to mention the amount of rouges that'll get in."

"They'll try to get in anyway."

"Extra security," Tim mumbled, switching to the document that was shared between the family for planning, "Got it."

"No-" Luke turned back to him, "That is not what I said."

Kate laughed. "Get back to work, you two. I'll be back in a bit to print off the invitations."

"We can get away with sending the invited late because we're The Waynes," Tim muttered to himself, "but any later than a day and we're on cracked ice."

"Isn't the saying 'thin ice'?"

"Only if you don't wear a mask o cowl to fight crime at night."

"Touché."

Part 8 Part 10

Week One

While Tim and Luke had been working on the guest list, Alfred and Kate set up the Ballroom, though they weren't decorating quite yet. That would be Selina and Cass's job. Though, as with everything in the Manor, Alfred expected the room to be set up perfectly. Along with the expectations of this prank going off perfectly, with room for improv should any unforeseen events take place, it's best to have everything ready starting as soon as they can.

There had to be storage somewhere in the house that only Alfred knew about because there's no way that the entire family of detectives missed what had to be a hundred round tables and triple the amount of chairs.

"This is an impressive amount of tables and chairs," Kate whistled lowly, "Where were you keeping these things?"

Alfred gave a small smile. "They're kept we're they've always been kept."

That answered no questions.

"Are you sure you're not hiding some kind of magic from everyone?" she wondered.

He didn't answer. "We'll start by setting up the tables along the edges of the room," he instructed, taking one of the circular tables from the rack and carrying to the nearest wall. He set it up quickly. "Leave six feet between the wall and the table. That way there is room enough to get behind whomever is sitting here without pushing against the wall."

Kate knew some of the people Tim was thinking of inviting. She knew for a fact that they'd take up as much space as they could. "Theoretically."

Alfred's eyes twinkled like he knew something about this that she didn't. He probably does. "Theoretically."

***

Steph and Damian are doing the seating and interference arrangements. Steph because she knows way more about gossip between pretty much all of the Justice League and the One Percent, and Damian because he was raised not only in propriety but also in espionage.

The way Alfred and Kate had set the room left the middle of the floor open for dance. At the head of the room, directly opposite the two sets of doors, was a stage that Alfred was keeping somewhere. The orchestra would be set up there with a podium for speeches.

Steph plopped the papers, pens, and tape she was holding onto the nearest table before sitting down. THe finished guest list sat on the top of the stack. "So, Baby Bat, how're we gonna go about this?"

Damian sat beside here, a chair between them, and took a pen and blank paper for himself. "Write down the name of each family, one per paper. Then, we'll decide who sits where based on relations to one another. The papers will act as a placement until Kyle and Cain come to decorate."

"Right," Steph picked up the other pen and paper for herself. "I'll take the bottom of the list, you take the top?"

"Very well."

It took no longer than seven minutes before each name on the list was on a seperate piece of paper, folded in half to stand on its own. Once that was done, the discussion was open.

"The One Percent will be offended if they don't get seated close to the stage." Damian opened.

"Yeah," Steph agreed, "But this ain't about them; it's about the Justice League."

"All of whom have been invited to bring their families under the pretense of random selection throughout the country. If we put them all at the front and together, then they'll know something is off."

"But the One Percent will be offended no matter where we put them!"

"Queen won't."

"Then the Queens take on of the front tables. Who takes the other?"

"The Kents?"

She shook her head. "That'll set a precedent of 'them or us'. Why don't we have the Wayne's take up the other front table?"

Damina denied the idea this time. "Favorability. We could take up both of the front tables, but that would be a moot point for interference and showing favor to whomever sits closest to us."

Steph threw her head back and sighed. "So, Queen gets a front table. We'll take the back two tables so that we can watch over everything."

"Impractical. We'll need to be at the front and back."

She groaned loudly. "Why can't this be easy?"

Damian scowled. "If it were easy, then this whole farce would be revealed in a moment. The more we focus on the details, the less likely it will be that the heroes will call us out."

"You really think they'd be stupid enough to try and call us out in a room full of people?"

"No, but they are not usually the best at keeping on the down low when they think they've figured something out."

"So what do we do about seats?"

Damian thought for a moment before making another nameplate for the Wayne Family. He left one on the table with Steph, in the back right corner of the room, and took the other to the uppermost table on the left side of the room. Then, he took the Queen Family nameplate and put it on the table in the top right by the stage.

Steph joined him at the Wayne table by the stage with her pen. "We'll have to specify who's sitting where exactly."

"Father will obviously have to be up front."

"It'll look bad if the others aren't here with him, so Bruce, Dick, Tim, Cass, you, and Duke will have to be up here."

"That leaves you, Kane, Gordon, Fox, Kyle, and Todd back by the doors." He hummed. "Will Gordon's father be joining us, or will he be helping security?"

She shrugged. "Beats me, ask Babs."

"We'll assume that Gordon's and Fox's fathers will be joining at the tables, so they'll have to sit back by the doors."

The two wandered back to their work station and wrote down their families names on the back of the placecard.

"I think we should stagger the placements," Steph suggested, "One Percent, than a Non-Oner, than a One Percenter, et cetera."

"That seems like a wise course of action. Who will be the most displease by that arrangement?"

"Luthor for sure," she laughed, "And probably most of the elites from everywhere that isn't Gotham."

He hummed again. "Then we should group them together by city instead of class, with Gothamites scattered about."

"That'll give a good way to hide security in here."

"Indeed."

Part 9 Part 11

Week One

Kate came back and printed out the invitations as soon as she and Alfred had finished setting out the tables and chairs in the ballroom. By then, Luke and Tim had finished the list and designed the invitations, ready to print them out. At the top, there was space to write in the name of the guest. On the back, they made sure to add in the RSVP information, theme, and dress code.

Suggestions had been thrown around about having an open invitation to bring their families, practically guaranteeing that the Justice League would bring their kids, but that was way too big of a security risk. So, the plan was to put 'family' after each surname to ensure that the families were invited to come along. Besides, this was agreed to be a private event, so not even press was getting in without explicit invitation. And even then, only three people from the press were getting in.

As soon as the invitations were printed out, Tim and Luke set about the somehow even more painstaking task of putting them all in envelopes and addressing them.

"How the hell does Alfred do this for every gala you guys host?" Luke groaned about four envelopes in.

Tim shook his head. "We have a set guest list and address book for every One Percenter in the country, as well as pre-made invitations for every gala of the year. All Alfred has to do is change up the invitations at the beginning of the year, make Bruce choose who gets to be at which one, and send of the invites."

"They're all pre-printed?"

"Yep."

"That seems like a lot of work to do at once."

"Yeah, but it makes the rest of the year easier."

"That's fair."

"You guys go to some real extremes, huh?"

Tim gave him a deadpan look. "You're one of us, Luke. Besides, you really expect any less from Bruce? I'm surprised he doesn't have the names and addresses of everyone in the country!"

Luke gave a considering hum. "How do you know he doesn't?"

"Because I've seen every file on the Batcomputer. Also, it's unrealistic, even for Bruce."

"Also a fair point, but I wouldn't put it past him if he ended up cataloging everyone at some."

"Not even the government has records of every person in the country."

"You're really gonna compare Bruce to the U.S. Government? Batman?"

"Yeah, I see you're point."

It took an hour to stuff and address every envelope. It took another forty-five minutes to seal them all. And, because they're the Waynes, therefore having to be extra at everything, they used a wax seal on all of them. Two different seals, actually, one for the Justice League Heroes and one for everyone else.

The black wax on the heroes' invitations was the Wayne Family coat of arms, altered slightly after Bruce took up the cowl: A sword cut behind a shield, like most coats of arms, but there were bat wings on either side of the top half of the shield. The shield was cut into four sections; the bottom one had weighing scales; the one on the right had a magnifying glass; the one on the left was a bird; and the one on top had a W in fancy calligraphy. A string of pearls hung off the pommel of the sword, and a robin's wings and tail poked out from behind the bottom half of the shield. Finally, a banner completed the seal at the bottom reading, "Eques Caliginous"; Knight Dark.

Every other invitation was sealed with the Wayne Family seal: A W in Elizabethan Calligraphy. Red wax for these ones.

As soon as the wax had dried on all of the envelopes, Luke and Tim gathered them in a stack and were quick to send them off. Their efforts were better used elsewhere now that they were done. Mostly getting ready for patrol, as well as starting the surveillance of the rogues. The gala needed to go perfectly, especially because it was set to end just before their patrol was going to start, but none of the bats were stupid enough to not start setting up fallbacks as soon as they could.

***

Dick and Duke were on Entertainment duty, meaning they had to find both the music and ways to entertain every person in attendance. Having the guest list done made this task exponentially easier. It's be easiest if they had the RSVPs, but they didn't really have time to wait on those, so they were working under the assumption that every family invited would show up.

"It'll mostly be adults in attendance," Dick said, "But there'll be teens and kids here, too."

They were standing in the ballroom, trying to figure out how to cater to everyone. It was a hard task.

"We could have a seperate room?" Duke suggested, "Something off from the main ballroom."

"Not a bad idea," agreed Dick, "But which room? And how would we decorate it?"

Duke shrugged. "We could use one of the sitting rooms? The one by the bathrooms down the hall should work. It's close enough to hear the music, but far enough that kids can escape their parents."

Dick smiled. "Good idea! Though, what about security?"

"Um... Let Bruce handle that?"

"Even better idea! I'll go hire the live music, you wanna put together a playlist for the kids?"

"Sure," Duke started to leave the room, "You sound old, by the way!" He ran before he could see Dick's betrayed sulking.

Part 10 Part 12