Incorrect Dcu - Tumblr Posts
...me, @sharmasaurus @justyourregulardepressedteen
No one:
Red Hood, in the middle of a gang fight:
Things my friends said as batfam quotes
Dick: JASON IF YOU DONT STOP ATTACKING US, I WILL REPORT THE CRIME ALLEY DRUG CARTEL
Tim: isn’t that a good thing?
Jason: not in my line of work, it isn’t.
Tim: *crying because he’s being beat in Titans Tower*
Jason: will you shut up? You’re interrupting my inner monologue
Dick: Jason, listen to me. I need you to go out and make the world a better place.
Jason: why is it that when others donate one kidney, they’re the ‘hero’ and they get an award but when I donate 7, I’m the ‘murderer’ and I’m being sent to Blackgate.
Jason: okay, so hear me out
Bruce: I regret to inform you that I will not be hearing you out due to the fact that I simply don’t want to
Alfred, tired of people not eating during dinner and being hungry later: No. No, I will not make you food. You’re going to eat your creamy, premium mayonnaise and you’re going to like it.
Jason: Speakin of money, how bout the 20$ you owe me?
Tim: Oh yea. Well, I only have 10$. *Takes out a 10$ bill, handin it to Jason* So, here's 10$. I owe you 10$.
Jason: Thanks.
Dick: Hey. You owe me 20$.
Jason: Well, here's 10$ and I owe you 10$. *Hands the bill to Dick*
Tim: Ah, ah. You owe me 20$.
Dick: Here's 10$, I owe you 10$. *Gives the bill back to Tim*
Tim: Here's the 10$ I owe you. *Gives the bill to Jason*
Jason: Here's the 10$ I owe you. *Gives the bill to Dick*
Dick: Here's the 10$ I owe you. *Gives the bill back to Tim*
Tim: Good! Now we're all even! *Pockets the bill*
Dick Grayson: Dad, I’m hungry.
Bruce Wayne: Hi hungry, I’m Dad.
Dick, tearing up: Did you just make a dad joke?
Bruce,sobbing: Did you just call me dad?
Alfred: *sighs*
Dick: what happened Alfie?
Alfred: this man cut me in the grocery line and his cart was full and two of his cards got declined so he set me back half an hour so i couldn't make my afternoon tea
Jason: *loading his gun* the scum dies tonight
Damian: *sketch pad out* i need a description to find and mutilate your oppressor Pennyworth
Tim: already hacked the cameras we've got him
Dick: isn't it justice not vengeance???
Bruce: fuck it. Damian grab your sword tonight, no one hurts Alfred
Damian: we ride at midnight
Dick: okay what is happening! no Alfred is this what you want?
Alfred: *visibly upset* he had a trump sticker on his wallet
Damian: hisses
Dick: grab my escrima sticks let's go