Ran.exe - Tumblr Posts
About ten years ago I decided that the next step I needed to take in my life was to accept and explore what it meant to be a failure and to have failed. This infuriated almost everybody in my life and clearly terrified a lot of people. People do not want you to accept failure. They dont want you to like... Sit with and think about it and pick it up and turn it arpund in your hands and really examine it. They want you to keep throwing yourself against the impossible walls until your body explodes! They do not want you to say "alright then, I've failed. What does that mean for me? Im still here. What does the life of someone who has failed look like?"
This makes people very angry and panicky.
My mental health improved in ways it had not in the previous DECADE once I stopped. And. Sat. With failure. And thought about what my failure ... Was. And looked at the structures that produced it and examined them critically.
It is so taboo to fail and admit it openly and talk about it. It is so taboo to talk about or think about failure in an accepting way rather than hiding it shamefully until you experience a degree of success in some area which allows you to present the past failure as "a stepping stone" to your current situation. Fuck that. We are put in positions of guaranteed failure by society every day and then punished and shamed for it. Lets fucking talk about failure
male gaze is not 'when person look sexy' or 'when misogynist make film'
death of the author is not 'miku wrote this'
I don't think you have to read either essay to grasp the basic concepts
death of the author means that once a work is complete, what the author believes it to mean is irrelevant to critical analysis of what's in the text. it means when analysing the meaning of a text you prioritise reader interpretation above author intention, and that an interpretation can hold valid meaning even if it's utterly unintentional on the part of the person who created the thing. it doesn't mean 'i can ignore that the person who made this is a bigot' - it may in fact often mean 'this piece of art holds a lot of bigoted meanings that the author probably wasn't intentionally trying to convey but did anyway, and it's worth addressing that on its own terms regardless of whether the author recognises it's there.' it's important to understand because most artists are not consciously and vocally aware of all the possible meanings of their art, and because art is communal and interpretive. and because what somebody thinks they mean, what you think somebody means, and what a text is saying to you are three entirely different things and it's important to be able to tell the difference.
male gaze is a cinematographic theory on how films construct subjectivity (ie who you identify with and who you look at). it argues that film language assumes that the watcher is a (cis straight white hegemonically normative) man, and treats men as relatable subjects and women as unknowable objects - men as people with interior lives and women as things to be looked at or interacted with but not related to. this includes sexual objectification and voyeurism, but it doesn't mean 'finding a lady sexy' or 'looking with a sexual lens', it means the ways in which visual languages strip women of interiority and encourage us to understand only men as relatable people. it's important to understand this because not all related gaze theories are sexual in nature and if you can't get a grip on male gaze beyond 'sexual imagery', you're really going to struggle with concepts of white or abled or cis subjectivities.
self proclaimed schizoposter nervously typing '911' into their phone and hovering their thumb above the 'call' key as they hawkishly watch a disheveled guy at a bus stop make repetitive movements and ramble to himself
they need to stop this NFL season now i am not joking or being facetious they need to reevaluate how football is played fundamentally and it should have happened after Tua earlier this season
Me: oh yeah, if you think school photography is hard now, try imagining doing this with film.
The new girl: what’s film?
Me: … film. Like… film that goes in a film camera.
New girl: what’s that mean?
Me: … before cameras were digital.
New girl: how did you do it before digital?
Me:… with film? I haven’t had enough coffee for this conversation
Image ID's incoming:
[ID: The three picture's on OP's posts are all identical except for the subtitled words and a slight change in facial expression. They show Brennan Lee Mulligan, a pale adult man with short auburn hair wearing a dark blue, dull orange, and grey plaid button-up shirt sitting at a table covered with piles of paper, books, and candles. Brennan is looking to his left in the photos. The subtitles on the three screen-caps read as follows: 'Purpose, true purpose,' 'is always down the scarier path,' 'through the darker part of the forest.' End ID] [ID: The picture consists of a quote from Brennan Lee Mulligan from the previous photos overlayed on a background of wavy green and sparkly gold colors behind a black silhouette of a forest that covers the bottom third of the picture. The text is pale yellow and reads as follows: "Purpose, true purpose, is always down the scarier path, through the darker part of the forest." The first three words -purpose, true purpose,- of the quote are shown in cursive, the next six words -is always down the scarier path- are in a scratchier font, and the last seven words, -through the darker part of the forest- are in a simple gothic font. End ID]
This is our first time doing a proper image ID, be gentle.
put that on an inspirational poster, or a lock screen background
can you imagine how freaky shark mermaids would be like unlike sharks, shark mermaids would have actual arms/hands and could rely on touching things with their hands to see if they’re prey rather than having to bite like sharks do. like youre just swimming in the ocean and suddenly you feel a strong grip on your leg, you freak the FUCK out because uh what????? the fuck??? youre swimming alone in the ocean??
a head pops out of the water, dorsal fin pointed from its back and it just points at you and says in a low whisper: “i thought you were a seal. please dont swim alone like this, im sorry i scared you i just wanted to see what you are” and then disappears back into the depth. what the fuck.
*bangs together pots and pans* HEY PORTAL AUTISTICS COME GETCHU GLADOS ART STUDY HOT 'N' FRESH!
a glados tutorial/study/notes or whateverr. rb if you'd like lawl i barely get reach
Her majesty, the king
Kate MccGwire, Secrete (mixed media with magpie feathers)
If you experienced trauma in childhood or had a rough childhood, dude listen to me. Offer yourself play. You were deprived of it.
Keep bubbles in the house, blow bubbles in the yard, blow them in your room, get a coloring book that doesn’t have to be an adult one with mandalas, watch cartoons, laugh at stupid things, dress up as a superhero for Halloween, wear a Santa hat on Christmas and big light up snowflake earrings, lay down on the floor, lay down in the grass, eat eggos for dinner sometimes. It’s not stupid. You’re not childish. You’re giving your inner child what they had taken from them. They deserve it.
Imagine if systems were really accepted by everyone though
Kids having little nicknames for all their parents in a system
Kids explaining that no their headmate is Not an imaginary friend but they do HAVE an imaginary friend and would love to play pretend with everyone
Coworkers seeing a fronting indicator and being like "oh hey it's been a while do you need help with anything? Oh you guys took notes to stay on track? Okay cool"
Grandmas who can't keep track of who's all in their grandkids system but remembering different headmates' interests and getting so many combinations as gifts
People telling stories about their plural relatives or about themselves and using the headmates name and pronouns instead of the singletsonas
Fictives cosplaying themselves or dressing up as themselves for halloween openly and people being normal about it and saying how cool it is
Dissociative disorders were as understood by people as depression and anxiety
You could actually tell your doctor things like "sometimes my sight is worse cause someone else is fronting" or "our symptoms change sometimes because of switches" and they could actually do research and find out how this is possible
Plural characters exist in most media, even picture books for kids, because it's accepted as a normal part of society
Just... we could all exist in peace and never have to worry about being "fake" or have our personhood erased. We'd never have to fight for dignity...
Why can't we have that?
Y’know what? Fuck you. *Plays an acoustic guitar version of your leitmotif to show you still have tenderness and care in your heart, and compassion for others*
“why bother writing bisexual characters if they just end up in a m/f relationship”
my dude
my guy
my pal
stop talking forever
My current plan to recover from my mental and emotional existence is to just go so deep into being insane that I'll come out sane on the other side. Being a chronic people pleaser plagued with impostor syndrome stretched me too thin, and that leash simply snapped and I am now a completely untethered, unapologetic vermin.
Fuck having impostor syndrome, if I'm not entitled to be here they should've barred the doors better. If I'm doing everything wrong because of imaginary rules that nobody told me about, that's their problem, you should have made your confusing system more idiot-proof.
I'm not here to please everyone and do everything right. I'm here to make bad art, chew on furniture, make people laugh, cook awful food and look at pretty landscapes, and piss off the people who don't want me to exist. If I have an unseen infinite debt somewhere that I can never pay back, I'm going to keep running that tab until I die. I'm alive purely because the universe is shit at pest control.
love is a good soup!
@tubbolul @latenightmining
calvin royal iii and joão menegussi rehearsing as adam and steve for christopher rudd’s touché