Skeleton War - Tumblr Posts
Via u/royalneonbird
That's some amazing math but it's wasted as many people will join the skeletons and many people will have to fight not just the skeletons you would have fought but you as well so everyone would be fighting at least 29 skeletons,they won't win.
the total number of humans ever to have lived is around 108 billion. the total number of people alive today is around 7.8 billion. that means there’s almost 14 skeletons per every living human.
do you think you can destroy 14 skeletons? what about your grandpa can HE destroy 14 skeletons? what about an INFANT CHILD? what kind of BABY can take on
14 WHOLE SKELETONS
what im saying here is that when the skeleton war happens some poor fool is gonna be fighting 15 skeletons because i’m stripping off my flesh onesie and joining the winning side.
HOW DO I JOIN THE SKELETON WAR
A QUESTION MANY ARE PONDERING IN MY INBOX
WELL FEAR NOT MY CHAOTIC COMPATRIOTS, I SHALL SHED CLARITY ON THE PROCESS WITH MY MIRROR SHIELD
JOIN FORCES WITH THE WIZARDS HERE. REBLOG THE POST TO SHOW YOUR VIGOR AND SUPPORT. COMMENT IN THE POST TO DECLARE YOUR INBOX IS OPEN FOR INVASION. HERE IS YOUR SPELL BOOK, BUT FEEL FREE TO MANIFEST YOUR OWN SPELLS
JOIN FORCES WITH THE SUPERIOR SKELETON LEGION. REBLOG THE POST TO INVOKE FEAR INTO OUR ENEMIES. COMMENT IN THE POST ABOUT THE EXCEPTIONAL MIGHT OF YOUR INBOX. WE MAY NOT HAVE SPELLS BUT WE HAVE COOL ENCHANTED WEAPONS.
IF YOU DO NOT WISH TO PARTICIPATE, USE ANY DOG EMOJI YOU HAVE 🐺🐶🐕🦺🐩🐕(EEEK) AND PUT IT SOMEWHERE VISIBLE ON YOUR ACCOUNT (NOT IN YOUR USERNAME, CHANGING YOUR USERNAME LEAVES THE OLD ONE OPEN FOR SOMETHING, THE DREADED LIFELESS PORN BOTS, TO TAKE)
also if i can be real for a sec, this isn't a "drive the wizards off the site" kind of war. this is a game on the playground at recess. this is calvin ball where you make it up as you go. this is simple, no-stakes, fuckery.
we want to encourage people to used blazed posts to not only build reinforcements for wizards and skeletons, but to also to support tumblr and the dev team to keep up their endearing nonsense. we can't do that by bullying and driving people off the site.
tumblr may be cringe, but its our cringe.
ALRIGHT? NOW LETS GET GOIN!
I JOIN THE SKELETON WAR ON THE SIDE OF THE WIZARDS
NYOHOHOHOHOHO~✨
LINK TO SKELETON WAR GUIDELINES
LINK TO SKELETON SIGN UP (HARRUMPH)
LINK TO OUR SPELL BOOK
LINK TO A COOL DOG
HOW TO PARTICIPATE
1: IF YOU WANT SKELETONS TO ATTACK YOU, COMMENT ON THIS POST ABOUT HOW BLAND AND DULL THEIR ARMOR LOOKS
2: GO OVER TO THE SKELETON SIGN UP POST, INVADE THE INBOXES OF ANYONE WHO MINDLESSLY COMMENTS, AND CAST A SPELL ON THEM (YOU SHOULD USE SPELL SUMMON BEAR)
3: POST ABOUT THE SKELETON WAR AND USE TAGS #skeleton war #skeleton war 2022 AND ALSO #wizardposting #wizard council
4: (OPTIONAL) BLAZE ONE OF YOUR SKELETON WAR POSTS TO ATTRACT MORE RECRUITS. IT IS IMPORTANT THAT YOU LINK TO THE GUIDELINES IN YOUR BLAZED POSTS
WE MUST PURGE OUR SACRED LAND OF THESE FOUL CREATURES IN TIME FOR OCTOBER
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY PORN BOTS IN THE #SKELETON WAR TAG
RAAAAAAAAAA
WE MUST WAGE WAR ON THE LIVING SIBLINGS
I miss Skeleton War posts so much. They’d usually start popping up around this time. People would be celebrating, even cracking jokes or participating. What happened to our dear Skeleton War brethren? Have they found peace? Or are we doomed to have weak bones?
I propose:
Skeleton War 2024.
Fucking wizards, man.
butts are the best invention because they are Round and Squishy and allow you to sit on things without your bones escaping
A whisper from the darkness speaks, "Hand me the orb, and I can tell you what secrets it holds"
SKELETON PONDERING ORB FOR YOUR SKELETON PONDERING ORB NEEDS
Okay, actually maybe I dont eant to participate in skeleton war.
if you fuckers do the skeleton war shit again this year we’re deleting the website for real
Ah I see we're finally getting supplies that aren't handcrafted
Nice.
GET YOUR SKELETON WAR SUPPLIES HERE
WIZARDS GO AWAY
-DEALS 20 SPOOKY DAMAGE AND 30 KABOOM DAMAGE
-HAS A 10% CHANCE TO RICOCHET AND HIT YOU IN THE FACE :(
-A CLASSIC, SIMPLY THROW AT THE TARGET AND HOPE THEY DON'T CAST FIREBALL
-DEALS 10 SPOOKY DAMAGE AND 15 BÖNK DAMAGE
-EASY FOR BEGINNERS TO WIELD, SIMPLY WACK THE TARGET
NEW
-POWERFUL MINION TO AID IN YOUR BATTLES
-IS PRONE TO DISOBEDIENCE WHEN IN PROXIMITY WITH OTHER FURBYS
-DO NOT LET IT NEAR YOUR HEAD I REPEAT DO NOT LET IT NEAR YOUR HEAD
MORE WARES COMING SOON
Come here my calcium comrades, and listen to this proposal!
Let's stand together to overcome this pest, for otherwise it will plague our merry doots and beloved afternoon grave dances for long after this war has ended!
Join forces with both wizards and mushrooms, and the spam bots shall cease!
Spam Bot Resistance Update
as some of you may know, i have called the factions of the skeleton war together for the common goal of defeating the dreaded Spam Bots
as our numbers are beginning to increase, i saw it fit to make a post briefing everyone on our plan.
first, of course we must all know how to properly combat a Spam Bot-see here:
but in order for us to truly make a difference we must spread the news to each corner of the Skeleton War, and beyond it. so i found it fitting for us to have our own tag, that we may find and support each other with no barriers for if we wish to win we must be united!
i have begun making use of the tag #spam bot resistance to represent our cause. this is still the skeleton war, but i felt we ought to have a way to find our comrades quickly.
remember, in order to turn Staffs gaze on these foul Bots, and put an end to the blight on this land, you mustnt merely block them, but report them as spam! these are the words we must spread, for the good of our home and for the good of the people here.
remember that Tumblr runs on word of mouth, so we will need not only to be fierce in battle, but quick in news.
good luck my brethren, of any type or alliance, and godspeed!
@8ball-wizard @mak-worse-imagination @basilikum7 @opalescent-apples @treerainer (hope you all dont mind the tags, just want to get word out there. let me know if it bothers you)
Ok , I'm considering joining the skeleton war 2022 but, I am undecided on sides, so wizards, skeletons, convince me
if you fuckers do the skeleton war shit again this year we’re deleting the website for real
